Blaming this one solely on my boyfriend who wouldn't shut the F up while I was trying to finish this chapter.

"Are you not tired?" Sasuke's fingers swept along an endless path from the lobe of her ear to the slope of her shoulder while his gaze remained trained on the door across the room.

"I have become accustomed to restless nights," Sakura murmured against his chest, her fist curling over his sternum, "As of late. I wish you were the only one haunting my dreams."

Sasuke's ministrations halted and she felt his grip tighten as his hand slid down her arm.

"They will not harm you," his words came with a deadly stealth, but Sakura shook her head.

"They already have. They have claimed my sanity, my resolve. These men," Sakura spat, "These soldiers of the Akatsuki, I despise them for having such power over me."

"You must not allow them to keep that power," he said firmly.

"How can I not?" she asked incredulously, "When I have no solace to call my own, when I have no means to defend myself - How am I to fight these men if I have not the tools?"

Sasuke bristled and met her wide, probing eyes.

"You want to fight them?"

"Should I not?" Sakura shot up sharply, peering down at him, her hand still clinging to his chest, "These are my lands that they ravage, my people that they kill. If that does not make it my fight - "

"Even if it does, battles are often not waged by those who ignite these quarrels."

"You think my family responsible for this war?"

"No," Sasuke shook his head solemnly, close to biting his tongue, though he found that difficult to do around her, "But they had a hand in it, yes."

Silence fell where Sasuke had expected Sakura's protest. She pulled away from him, retreating into herself.

"So I am to remain idle? As I have the entirety of my life?"

"Not idle," he assured her, "But as a pillar of strength for your people."

"A pillar," Sakura scoffed, "An object to be marveled at, and yet the foundation it was built on is often forgotten," her resolve strengthened, "These people are my foundation, my father is my pillar, but I will not be a silent ruler. I am borne of their strength," she breathed deeply, nostrils flaring, "And their strength is what I will carry to my battle."

Sakura watched the shift in Sasuke's features. A story played out, led by his admiration for her, which was promptly followed by his fear, his anger, his apprehension, perhaps not for her, but it still elicited defiance within.

"Do you think it is not my place to speak of such things?" Sakura questioned, "Do you think me naive? That I might romanticize war?"

Sasuke swallowed harshly and struggled to push himself up so that he might meet her level gaze.

"Perhaps," he did not wish to offend her and he thought her naive on the subject only because she was raised in such a way, "But it is not your fault."

"You might be right. There is only so much one can learn from literature," she sighed heavily and looked away from him, "It is one thing to know of something, but to experience it - "

"Why would you want to experience war?" Sasuke fought to understand her reasoning.

"I suppose in some macabre manner, it is because I am bored," her chin tilted down, hiding her eyes from him, "I wish to understand things other than this life."

"Death is not a thing to wish for."

"And yet you, as a soldier, deal in it so impertinently."

"Perhaps I have become accustomed to it," Sasuke reached for her hand; she squeezed his tightly.

"Does it not haunt you?"

"I am haunted by things worse than death."

"Like me?" Sakura asked lightly.

"Precisely."

"Is that true?" She turned to him in disbelief.

"I am haunted by things I can not have," the marvel in her eyes was not lost to him.

"But that would mean you want me," Sakura teased, running her fingers over the palm of his hand.

"Is that difficult to fathom?"

"Yes," Sakura admitted, "At least, until you come back to me."

"I suppose I have developed a habit of chasing you," he smirked.

"I do not mind it," she giggled as his hand moved up her arm. He followed the slope of her shoulder to the nape of her neck to pull her into a kiss, but she stalled him, "What else do you wish for that you can not have?"

Sasuke sighed, his breath fanning over her lips. He pulled back to meet her gaze, but he shook his head, the words lost to him.

"Please," Sakura murmured, "There are many things I still wish to know about you and often times I do not know where to start. I must take my chances when I can," she pondered for a moment, then, through his silence, she continued, "Sasuke-kun, if there is anything worse to hear than your name, I should like to hear it now."

"Before what?" he mused.

"Before I fall any more in love with you," she stated without any frivolity or pomp about it. He admired her a long moment before he spoke.

"I suppose that would be the kind thing to do," Sasuke smirked; kindness was never something he had likened himself to.

"Do you think yourself capable of that?" she finally teased. He chuckled and it caused a smile to spread over her face, but as his thoughts caught up with him, along with the weight of her questions, he quickly grew somber.

"Sakura, there is not one thing in my life that I have wanted that has not been taken from me. Nothing has turned out like I imagined it would when I was a child," he lost her gaze as he bowed his head, "Itachi, my parents, they painted a very different picture of my life before everything happened. They told me I was destined," he huffed, "For great things. I would venture that is what most parents tell their children, but I truly believed it. And when Itachi left - nothing was the same after that."

"When did you meet Naruto?"

"I had always known him, and his family. Itachi had arranged for me to leave with Naruto and his parents, but we could only hide out for so long. I do not know where they are now," Sasuke shrugged, but the expression on his face suggested he was not as flippant as his gesture, "Of all the things that could have happened to him, I am grateful that Naruto is only at war."

Sakura did not press him when he fell silent, rather she took up his hand and gave it a tight squeeze. For the first time in her life, she was beginning to comprehend a loneliness that she herself had never felt before. It was different from what she knew, from what was familiar. In her loneliness of misconception, she was comforted by the environment around her. The palace grounds were hers to do as she pleased, the garden was an extension of herself, and it dawned on her then that she was more disturbed by the Akatsuki attack for how they had robbed her of that possession. It was not her life she feared for, but instead her repose.

She thought she had understood Sasuke's loneliness, but it was a different matter entirely. It was as though someone had set a candle before her, a small, flickering flame to light the darkness. But that same person had forbade her from reaching it; all she could do was watch as the flame trembled and slowly died.

The Empress shook as she held the letter in a tight grip. Littered on her husband's desk were identical parchments with similar words that all promised the same threat. The Hokage's seal was broken on each one. She stood abruptly, the gilded throne scraping against the stone floor as she pushed away from her husband's desk. She tore at the parchment with harried fingers as she marched over to the fire whereupon she tossed every scrap into the embers. Mebuki watched the paper curl, writhing as if in pain. The words written upon them were so vile she wished briefly that she could cause them pain in turn. She huffed, what an irrational thought. As the letters blackened and turned to ash, she did not move, rivaling the flames before her with the rage that stirred within her. She could not distinguish who she was more upset with; the Hokage for making such an odious request, or her husband for not telling her of the man's intent.

That morning, as the light crept through her curtains, filtering through every slit it could find, Sasuke decided he despised the sun. If there ever was an enemy, it would be that immortal illumination that came with every new day, shooing away the darkness that coveted his time with Sakura.

Nonetheless, he slipped away from her and took up his shirt. He struggled to slip it on and the rustling caused Sakura to stir.

"Must you leave already?" she rubbed her tired eyes and crawled over to him, the sheet falling from her still naked form.

"I am expected at the infirmary," he paused his movements to peer at her as she pulled herself up to sit, "If you are attempting to persuade me to stay - "

"I would not stoop to such tactics," she feigned offense and tossed her hair over her shoulder to expose more of her pale skin, "How dare you accuse me!"

"It is either that or you truly have no modesty."

"Not where you are concerned," she admitted with a sly smile and moved to stand before him, assisting with his shirt, "Will you be at the infirmary all day?"

"I do not know," he answered, as Sakura finished pulling his arms through his shirt, "I was released only on the condition that I return for a daily check up."

"May I - ," Sakura huffed as Sasuke began buttoning his shirt, "Well I would like to see you again today."

"Is that so?" Sasuke attempted to hide his smirk; for once he was playing coy.

"It is," she grinned, "And I dare say, as your superior, I command you to visit with me once more today. At least."

"My superior," Sasuke mused and paused his fumbling fingers; he could not wait to be rid of the sling. His good hand rose to her cheek. He thumbed her jawline before dropping to the delicate slope of her neck. His hand tensed against her, but she could sense his restraint without the flex of his knuckles. She sighed heavily and leaned closer to him. She watched his gaze drop to her lips, irises darkened to near black by his primal need, "Very well, Sakura."

He resumed buttoning his shirt and stood, peering down at her with carelessly concealed lust.

"I will be back tonight, but I do not think it wise for you to visit me at the infirmary," he grimaced as her face fell, but before he could say anything she spoke up.

"I understand, Sasuke-kun," she stood from the bed and walked up to him, placing her hands on his chest, "Until tonight, then."

"Until tonight," his good hand came up to squeeze hers and she smiled.

"We're not far now," Deidara stoked the fire as he spoke. The men around him were quiet, merely staring into the flames, losing themselves within the light. They were famished, restless, and exhausted. While the promises of glory, of becoming heroes when they returned home, were becoming less of the pipe dreams they once were and more of the tangible future that lay before them, it was the scarcity of food in the winter that was beginning to make them certain they would never see that future. It was only the fear of disloyalty that kept them on their path.

"I was not expecting you to come for your check up," Kusako smiled as she redressed the bandage on his leg.

"Why?"

"Most of your kind," she huffed and wound the gauze tightly around his thigh, "Soldiers I mean, usually hold too much pride to come seeking help."

"This is necessary," Sasuke shrugged as Kusako tied the bindings and rose to her feet. She unhooked the sling holding his arm and set it aside. Slowly and with great care, she straightened his elbow, keeping a firm grip on his forearm.

"The Emperor's daughter once said the very same thing to me," she chuckled. Sasuke smirked, he supposed that didn't surprise him. "Even still she carries the same independence."

Sasuke couldn't agree more, given that she rarely did as she was told. Kusako bent his arm at the elbow slowly and Sasuke winced, but she did not apologize, only repeated the motion until the pain began to dull.

Sakura meandered through her father's halls, admiring the tapestries that hung from the walls. She hadn't visited the gallery in quite some time. There was rarely a soul within that part of the grounds during the winter, as that building seemed to keep the cold air much more than any other.

As a child, Sakura greatly enjoyed exploring the many rooms with her father, as he retold the valiant tales depicted in silk and cotton fibers. When she often wandered away, without fail her father would be able to find her seated beneath her favorite tapestry; the image of a man, her brother, seated atop his horse, sword in hand, as he rode into battle. The embodiment of a knight, a man of honor, and on a gilded mantle beside the artwork held his very same sword alongside its sheath. It was the only thing of her brother's that still remained in that palace.

Before the war those grounds had been their home most winters; as many royal families did, they moved with the seasons. But the last palace her brother had called home rested beyond their reaches now, overtaken by the Akatsuki, and so the remainder of his belongings were lost to them, forever.

Sakura touched the hilt, her fingers skimming over the gold that twisted like a ribbon around it. She followed the hilt to the blade that sloped on either side and curved to the sharpened tip. The steel was as clear as any mirror and her father had often encouraged her to look into it just the same. He had told her that her brother's spirit resided in that sword and if she stared at the blade long enough, she would be able to see his reflection. She had never been sure when she was younger if she ever had seen him. But as she did so this time, she was certain all she could see was her own green orbs staring back at her.

There was confusion and naivety within them, as well as a fragility that unsettled her like nothing ever had before. It irked her terribly, and she desired to do something about it.

The barracks were remarkably empty when Sasuke arrived, but then again, the majority of his fellow soldiers were accompanying the Emperor on his journey. And without Kakashi to lead them at the palace, many seemed to default to watching over the Emperor's wife, while the rest remained in the infirmary.

It seemed as though the courtiers outnumbered the guards, something that would have previously been a problem for Sasuke. Now, it seemed those odds were working in his favor. There was a chance that every other soldier would be too busy to notice if he came and went as he pleased from Sakura's rooms. A chance. Sasuke pulled his pack out from under the bed and set it atop his sheets.

Was that good enough for him?

"Lee, come now, you must make amends with her," Tenten urged him, pulling at his sleeve as they neared Sakura's quarters.

"Yes, Lee, you must," Ino pouted, teasing him, "Seeing as you've made such a mess of things."

"Have I really?" Lee blanched, "Has she said something?"

"Not a word," Ino giggled, "That is not like her. You must have really done it this time."

"Oh shush, do not torture him so," Tenten chastised Ino, "Simply apologize to her and all will be set right."

Sasuke stood back from the occasional crowds that bustled along the walkway as he watched Lee and a pair of Sakura's ladies approach her doors. He had every intent now, his pack slung over his shoulder, of returning to Sakura sooner than they had agreed, but found he was not the only one with that same urge.

A series of rapid knocks startled Sakura and she quickly shut the entrance to her bedroom, before racing to open the doors to her sitting room. Ino, Lee, and Tenten stood expectantly at the threshold, awaiting an invitation. Sakura peered over their shoulders before ushering them in, searching for the person she hoped would be at her doors instead.

"Sakura-san," Tenten spoke sweetly, "Are you all right? We have been so worried."

"Yes, I'm fine," she answered promptly, shutting the doors behind her and turning to face them, "Why?"

"Well, we haven't seen very much of you lately," Ino said plainly, "I know how greatly you value your privacy, but we were beginning to think something was bothering you."

When he didn't speak, Ino's elbow brushed Lee's side in a gentle nudge.

"Yes," he muttered gingerly, "Is something the matter?"

"Not at all," Sakura shook her head, oblivious.

"Well," Tenten laughed boisterously, "What a relief! Come, Ino, Karin will be expecting us."

She linked arms with Ino and began pulling her towards the doors.

"Yes, a relief," Ino's eyes darted to Lee several times before she finally turned to follow Tenten, "We should not keep her waiting. Good day, Sakura-san!"

The door shut with a loud bang that led way to a thickening silence, but Sakura cracked a smile as it dawned on her what her ladies were attempting to do.

"How sweet of them to worry," Sakura said with a simper, "How very thoughtful of them to come down here in this weather, simply to tell me that they held concern for my wellbeing."

"Yes," Lee had difficulty meeting her gaze. He shifted his feet and folded his hands behind his back.

Sakura's smile faltered; he truly felt remorse for the words he spoke to her. She could not tease him, she realized; it would not be fair.

"You do not need to apologize to me," guilt gnawed at her stomach as she spoke, "I should apologize for being so cross with you."

"No," finally he looked at her and the hope in his eyes pulled at her heart, "I was out of line. I - I should not have said such a thing. It was - "

"A mistake," Sakura amended, "We both made a mistake."

"Yes," Lee sighed, relieved, but Sakura felt as though a noose were tightening around her neck, "I know you are not capable of such things. I know you are honorable and selfless."

"I am not - "

"You are," he insisted, stepping closer to her, "In my own jealousy I was blinded by reason. Uzumaki-san is a fine man, I am grateful for his services. But I could not help feeling envious that he was awarded your attention," Lee laughed at himself, "I suppose I felt neglected."

Sakura bowed her head to hide her shame. His words were causing her blood to run cold.

"I am sorry if I have been thoughtless as of late," she said softly.

"No, do not be sorry. You must be so distraught without your father. I am sorry for causing you unnecessary strain," he sounded so sincere as he spoke, but Sakura still could not bring herself to look into his eyes, fearful of what lay there.

"Lee-san, you speak so considerately of me."

"It is because I know you!" he insisted, "I know you are so much more than you present to the world."

"You should not presume such things," she murmured.

"I am certain of it," he continued.

"How?" she challenged.

"Because I love you," Lee said it so simply that Sakura had to replay it in her mind over and over until the words sunk in. Her heart stopped as a cold grip took hold of her body. She began to shake her head, but stalled the motion. It took several gulping breaths before she could find the will to speak, and when she did, she lifted her head.

"Love is depraved," Sakura peered thoughtfully at him and noted the kindness that always seemed to reside in his eyes, "You are not depraved."

"Would you like me to be?"

"I would not ask you to be more or less than who you are."

"And yet I would be anything for you, change anything for you," he professed.

"You should not have to."

"But I would!" he insisted, advancing on her, taking her wrist boldly.

"You should not say these things so lightly," Sakura lowered her eyes from his intense gaze and pulled against his grip, but he stayed his hand.

"It is with the immeasurable weight you have placed on my heart that I utter these words to you," he pulled her hand against his chest, pleading though she could not see the desperation he held within him.

"I am sorry I have left this weight with you," she muttered, skin beginning to flush.

"No, you mustn't be sorry," he pleaded, "Without you I would not know love."

"You do not know it now," she flinched from her own words as she wrested herself free.

"How can you claim that?" he asked without accusation, only earnest.

"Love should not be spoken, it should be felt," she said sharply, unable to contain herself, "It is something shared, it is desire and anger, pain and suffering, and - ," she swallowed harshly, but was unable to quell her need to speak her next words, "And happiness - it is a bliss the Gods themselves could not conjure. It is not something that can be put into simple words, try though we might, because it is not a simple thing. Love," she lost her breath when she saw the look on his face, "You do not love me, Lee. You cannot."

As the silence stretched, Sakura thought he might ask why, after all he opened his mouth to speak, but instead he turned from her and left her chambers.

Relief swelled within him when Sasuke saw Lee leave her quarters, and with a discouraged look on his face, as well. He waited until Lee had walked a good distance away before approaching her doors. He knocked only twice and the entrance flung open, an aggravated expression on Sakura's face greeting him. But then it softened as she realized who stood before her.

"Sasuke-kun," she breathed a sigh of relief and pulled him into her sitting room, taking care to lock the doors behind her. The area was dark, except for the fireplace that crackled; she had pulled the curtains over the windows. Fear gripped Sasuke for the briefest moment as he set his pack down.

"Did he do something to you?"

"No," she turned from him and began a pace as she spoke, "But, Lee has told me he loves me."

She did not look up to see his reaction, though Sasuke had grit his teeth and clenched his good fist. He could not speak, for what could he possibly say to that? What did she want him to say? Lee came from a noble family of good standing and fine breeding. It was easy to picture him beside Sakura, but it was a truth, Sasuke thought, that was very difficult to swallow.

"Why must you tell me this?"

"Because I am afraid!" Sakura exclaimed, coming to face him, her eyes brimming with tears, "I am terrified of what this means. If he decided to pluck up the courage to propose to me, he would have my mother and father's blessings in a heartbeat. And what am I to do then?"

"You would accept his proposition," Sasuke answered with a forced monotone.

"How can you say such a thing?" she searched his eyes, those endless black pools that threatened to swallow her every time, "How can you look at me like that and say those words?"

"What else am I to say, Sakura?" he became exasperated, holding his hand out as if she could offer him some manifestation of a solution to all of their problems, "I am nothing to your family. And if they knew who I truly was then I would be less than nothing to them."

He softened when he saw the tears begin to fall down her cheeks. His good hand reached for her neck to pull her close and she wrapped her arms around him. She took a shaky breath, frustrated.

"I do wish you would do as you please - with me, at least," she whispered.

"How do you mean?" they pulled apart slightly, only so they could look into the other's eyes.

"If you wish to kiss me, I wish you would do it," her voice grew stronger, "And if you wish to touch me, then I wish you would touch me. I wish you would touch me as one does a lover," he did not flinch when she said that, "I wish you would ravish me, raze my skin, my very soul with your hands; for I am yours and no one else's," his heart swelled as she said those words, but all he could do was look at her, "Sasuke-kun, I know you are tempted, too."

She stepped back from him and pulled her hair free from its bun. Her long rosy tendrils fell around her in single wave. Her fingers began making quick work of the buttons at the front of her robes, shedding each layer of dress until she stood bare before him. The hitch in his breath and the slip of his gaze did not go unnoticed by her. She took up his good hand as she stepped toward him and raised it to touch her breast. Without her command his fingers tightened slightly.

"Was it not pleasant?" she gasped.

"What?" his throat was dry, scorched by his desire for her.

"When you touched me like this?" her hands went to his chest to unzip his vest. She began to tremble when his thumb brushed her nipple, "When you put your lips upon me, was it not pleasant?"

"It was," he affirmed; Kami, it was.

"It is just us now," his hand slipped below her breast to follow the curve of her waist, "You may touch me as you please, you may touch me without consequence - "

"Sakura - "

"Who would find out?" she challenged him, "More than half the army resides with my father and the others are either sleeping or posted elsewhere. And what's more, the only two keys to my chambers reside with the only two people occupying this room."

To that, he could not argue. He pulled her body against his, claiming her lips in a kiss that demanded they share everything they had to offer. Sakura was all too eager to oblige. With great care not to disrupt their kiss and difficulty with his sling, Sakura removed his upper layers. The touch of bare skin spurred them into movement as they quickly broke away to retreat to her bedroom.

Sasuke urged her to lay back on the sheets as he kissed a path down her neck. He relied solely on his good arm to support himself while his lips moved to her breasts, to press light, teasing kisses upon her skin. Sakura's breath caught in her throat and she closed her eyes at the sensation of his tongue meeting her nipple. But as soon as he bestowed that pleasure on her, he took it away, coming to sit back on his heels. Though, just as quickly, his fingers began inching up her thigh. Sakura's heart quickened merely at the prospect of what he might do.

"I have wanted this for longer than you know," he admitted. She opened her eyes in time to catch the lascivious glint in his as he spoke.

"Your self control is admirable," her breath hitched before she could continue when his thumb brushed over her clit.

"But you do not care for it, do you?" Sasuke teased with a smirk. She shook her head, at a loss for words when he circled her entrance. As he slipped a finger inside, she gasped and clutched the sheets beneath them, "I thought not."

His finger curled and retreated only to invite a second to further his torment of her. Her warm, tight walls clutched him desperately as she cried out. He moved closer to her, continuing the rhythm of his fingers, and passed his tongue along her wet cunt. Sakura released the sheets, her hands flying to his hair to twist and urge him on, but he pulled away. She whimpered and bit her plump bottom lip in frustration. Her hair was already mussed from her slight writhing on the bed, her cheeks flushed with passion, her eyes alight with desire and longing.

She was breathtaking.

"How you break for me," he whispered, the words falling sinfully from his tongue. He thumbed the waistband of his pants and Sakura's gaze dropped, as if she dared him to rid himself of the obtrusive garment.

"Do you intend to keep me on the edge like this?"

"Only so you might know how it feels," his eyes darkened as he unbuttoned his pants and slid down the zipper, "Every moment I am with you, every moment that I cannot touch you is an endless torment."

"Then you are always at the chasm of satisfaction?" she questioned with a coy smile, moving to kneel on the bed before him. She hooked her fingers in the belt loops of his trousers and pulled down. His cock fell free, thick and swollen with his own need for her. He cupped her chin and lifted her eyes to his.

"Always."

"Another letter from the Hokage, My Lady. It has just arrived."

The Empress extended her hand gingerly to receive the envelope. She turned it over carefully, examining the seal imprinted in the crimson wax. She paused, her finger at the seam, ready to tear it.

"Is there a reason you are still here?" Mebuki questioned, without raising her eyes to the messenger who stood just behind her guards.

"The Hokage has requested I await your response, Your Highness. I am not to return until I have it," the messenger stammered slightly, taken aback by her directness.

She did not respond, she only broke the seal and unfolded the parchment as she removed it:

To the Esteemed Ruler of our Great Lands,

I hope this letter finds you well, as I am afraid I did not receive a response to my most recent proposition. I understand you must be quite occupied, but I am certain it is the same thing that keeps us up at night. The Akatsuki have devastated our provinces for too long now and together I am assured we can forge a stronghold that even the most fearsome of enemies could not penetrate. Though, I am forced to take your lack of correspondence as refusal. Once more I offer you this proposal; your daughter is of a reputable age and I have no doubt you shall want her to marry for privilege and for the bastion of your rule. I offer this to you as a last chance to fortify our households against the Akatsuki. Should you refuse, then, I daresay, you will be left to your own depleted military resources.

With my best regards,

- Hokage of the Provinces of Konoha

Mebuki folded the parchment down and took a deep breath. She stood from her husband's desk and took a steady pace to the fire. She gripped the mantle in one hand and crushed the letter in the other, then threw it into the flames below. She steadied herself before she spoke.

"You may tell your Hokage that if he wishes to insult my family with such propositions he should do it in my presence, as any proper man would. He is too busy, no doubt, hiding behind his walls for the fear he holds for my husband. I do not blame him for that, surely he knows where the allegiances of our people rest," Mebuki stalked back to the desk, her footsteps emphasizing the finality of her words. She placed her hands flat against the wood, "I would sooner trust a child with the fate of our nation than I would that deranged man."

The messenger stood rigid in his place, awaiting another onslaught of defamation of his Hokage, but it did not come.

"That is all," Mebuki took her seat and resumed her previous task, looking over the papers littered on her desk, "Escort him out."