Trials (part 2):

Ezra had known, more or less, that he'd end up a Mandalorian in some fashion once he married Sabine, but it had never dawned on him that he'd have to become one before.

It really should have.

Not that that would have changed his mind or anything – marrying Sabine was worth any sort of trial or inconvenience.

And so far, the tests didn't seem that ridiculous. Mandos were all tough bastards, so it made perfect sense that the first requirement was one of fortitude and wit.

Not that it made it any less awful that he had to do this in the snow, though. Uggghh.

Why the hells does Sabine have to come from a winter planet?

I can take cold. I've been cold lots of times. But this kriffing white stuff is just a pain in my ass. Or legs, as the case may be. Force, why does it have to be so deep?

Since Ezra had been trudging through snow deeper than his knees for a while now, he had every right to complain about the burning in his muscles unused to the activity.

And here I thought I was in good shape.

Not.

Karabast.

As he grumbled to himself, Ezra had been traversing the edge of the lake, looking for a decent place to huddle in for the night while still keeping the Wren Stronghold in sight. (Having no wish to get himself cold and lost, thank you very much.)

The grey light of early evening illuminated the surrounding forest in varying degrees of shadows, making his search harder, but after maybe half an hour of searching (and trudging and grumbling) Ezra finally spotted a fallen tree whose upended roots had made a natural little cave. The ground was bare underneath and everything, showing a dense bed of old leaves and evergreen needles that had blown in.

It looked downright comfortable at this point.

And he'd definitely slept in worse places back in the day.

Grinning at his find, Ezra turned his attention to filling in the front of the small enclosure with something so that his body heat could potentially stay trapped within and keep him warm, knowing that it would likely fall to -20 Centigrade overnight. That something ended up being the branches of a dying evergreen tree, whose needles were about halfway to turning orange but had not yet fallen off. The boughs were still difficult to snap off, but not as hard as a healthy tree would have been.

Once he'd propped the fluffy (but very sharp and pokey) branches around the open part of his new shelter in a thick wall (leaving room for him to slip through on one side), propping the ends in the snow and winding the tips through the roots above, Ezra then packed more snow over the branches to fill in any cracks. Handling the evil, crystallized stuff made his hands ache with cold, and he was really wishing for more water-proof gloves at the moment, but he knew it would be worth it in the long-run.

Next, he made a small door out of more branches that he could prop up in the remaining opening, intertwining the smaller twigs to hold it all together and then winding his belt through it for good measure.

The last thing he did was take the removable hood off the waterproof (and thankfully very large) cloak and fill it with the cleanest snow he could find. He used the draw strings to pull it as tightly closed as possible, and then tucked the pouch of snow between his jacket and shirt to melt into water for himself.

Once all of that was done, his body was plenty warm – nearly sweating, in fact - and in complete contradiction to his wet trousers and freezing hands. But Ezra was proud of what he'd accomplished.

Before crawling into his new home for the next twenty-something hours, Ezra looked back across the lake towards the Stronghold. He didn't have to stretch his senses at all to feel Sabine looking back in his direction, undoubtedly watching the show he'd provided through the zoom feature on her helmet, making him smile to himself. He figured it was safe enough to send her a little burst of love down their bond, positive there was no way that could break the 'no Force' rule since it had nothing to do his endurance test.

And what Ursa doesn't know…

Sabine's worried presence brightened considerably at the gesture, and he really wanted to wave at her, but that might be too obvious a use of his abilities, so instead, Ezra turned and gave a cheeky salute to the unlucky Wren warrior who'd been chosen to follow Ezra out into the snow.

The grey and gold covered man, almost completely hidden behind a tree a few hundred metres away startled slightly and then stiffened, clearly not expecting to have been found out in his spying. Ezra smirked to himself as he ducked into his shelter, dragging the door closed after him, imagining the report already. 'The kriffing Jetti brat spotted me, Countess! What do I do now?'

Ezra laughed quietly to himself. He didn't have to be a Jedi to know when he was being followed. That particular skill had been developed from an early age on the streets and had nothing to do with the Force, just an innate sense of possible danger that any good little street rat learned for the sake of survival and self-preservation.

All closed in, the tree root cave was nearly lightless and smelled of earth and cold moisture. It wasn't unpleasant. Nor was he scared of the dark. In fact, he'd have no problem sleeping away the majority of his test if he felt like it. His stomach might rumble a time or two near the end, but even the lack of food didn't concern him much, having gone hungry more often than not between the ages of seven and fourteen. And even after he'd joined the Ghost crew, food hadn't always been in abundance due to lack of credits. Hera and Kanan had done their best to provide their family with as much sustenance as possible, often pretending that they weren't hungry so Zeb and the younger members could eat, but Ezra had seen right through that almost immediately and called them on it whenever he could. Sabine had also learned through hard times how to make food last as long as possible, so the four of them eventually came to an agreement to share equally, while making sure that Zeb got enough dietary fuel to keep his much larger frame strong and healthy. (As their muscle guy, no one begrudged him the extra rations.)

Thinking about food made Ezra groan a little though, because he'd been essentially dragged away from his dinner… which had been particularly good and far above the fare usually offered to the rebels on Yavin 4. (He might be able to tolerate hunger more than most, but that didn't mean he didn't covet the good food when it appeared.)

At least I have a distraction in the form of the data pad Ursa gave me, Ezra thought as he curled up on the ground, snuggling under the large cloak, his boots and gloves now off and hopefully drying to some degree. With access to the holonet and a lot of free time, Ezra had no doubt that he could put a sizeable dent in learning Mando'a to impress the Countess and her clan with. Okay, and Sabine too, he added to himself with a little smile, imagining his beloved's pleased reaction to hearing him speak her language fluently.

Or at least, not pathetically.

Hopefully.

With resolve in his heart to nail at least the learning of the Mandalorian creed known as the Resol'nare, Ezra turned on the data pad, blinking at the glow as his eyes adjusted to seeing bright light again.

Once he was able to focus, he grutned a little in surprise to see a message on the screen.

Babe! I have news! Text me back!

Ezra shook his head fondly as he smiled and typed back, I'm here. Because, of course Sabine figured out how to slice into his data pad, brilliant genius that she is. And nothing like a little command from her mother would stop her from talking to him somehow if she wanted to - as she'd proved years ago when Sabine first reunited with her clan and spent all those months secretly texting and holo-comming Ezra and her Ghost family against her mother's wishes.

Thank kriff! I was worried you'd go straight to sleep first after all that exercise.

Ezra huffed to himself, rolling his eyes. It wasn't that hard.

Liar. You know you wanted to die after walking in the snow for half an hour.

All right. He had to give her that one. Fine. Maybe not die, but it certainly sucked.

Hah!

Don't rub it in.

Sorry, babe. (Heart)

Forgiven. (Heart eyes.)

You're doing great, by the way. Everyone is impressed with your shelter. We all watched the live feed from Caden's bucket like it was the best movie ever.

Ezra felt his face heat with pleasure at the praise. Thanks. But as much as he'd rather just chat lovey dovey nonsense with her for the next twenty hours, Ezra couldn't help but remember the feel of the urgency to her first message. You said you had news?

Oh! Right! They're pretty sure what knocked you out was the destruction of Alderaan.

Ezra gasped. Kriff! That's bad! Leia's homeworld! Oh, Force. Bail Organa! Didn't he just return home yesterday?

Yes. He and everyone else on planet are presumed dead. And Leia is still captured as far as we know.

Frag. The sorrow of all those lost lives hit Ezra hard, forcing him to have to breathe deeply to regain his composure.

There's something else.

A feeling of dread settled in his chest as the words popped up on his screen. What?

Kanan was knocked out to by the Force thing too and he's still unconscious. Hera is really worried.

Double frag.

Exactly. Can you do your bond thing and get him to wake up?

Ezra tried to laugh at 'bond thing' but it came out sounding way too much like a sob. I'll see what I can do. I'll let you know if it works.

Love you, babe. Good luck.

Love you more, Sabie. Talk to you soon.

(Heart)

Feeling despairing, hopeful, and determined all in one, Ezra turned off the data pad to save the battery and then closed his eyes for what would most likely be the most important meditation session of his entire life.

As much as it ached, he could still feel the gaping hole in the Force where millions of lives used to be. The all-encompassing entity was hurting badly and still spreading its pain throughout the galaxy. Reaching for his connection to Kanan, he found it, but weaker than he'd ever felt before even with the distances that they'd been separated in the past.

It felt like… just like with the lives lost… Kanan was falling into the black hole. And that just wasn't acceptable.

With grim determination, Ezra mentally followed the bond with his Master into the darkness.

Kanan was walking endlessly in the dark, and he couldn't find his way out. Everywhere he looked, there was just more deep black shadows.

This was worse than when he'd first lost his sight. At least then he still had his other senses. This was just an empty nothingness. He lost all sense of time and place the longer he was stuck there.

Desperately trying to keep his spirits up, he thought of his beautiful, courageous Hera, and his Padawan, Ezra, who had become as close as a son to him, and the rest of his unorthodox family. He had so much to live for, so he was determined to keep trying to find his way out.

He tried to remember what had sent him here, but his failing memory drew a blank.

Maybe it was better this way. He had a feeling it had to be something truly horrific.

At least I still have my memories of Hera.

As he walked aimlessly in what was probably circles with no clear path to follow, he replayed every moment he had spent with her, from their first meeting on Gorse until the last moment on the Ghost. The last thing he remembered was of watching his beloved stroll away from him – admiring the seductive sway of her golden image in the Force.

His mind substituted in an older memory of her, where she was actually in living color and not just a Hera shaped Force signature. He remembered her beautiful emerald eyes, the perfect features on her delicately shaped face. His favourite shade of green all over the soft skin of her perfectly curved body. The patterns on her lekku.

Which reminded him of his wedding ring.

He gently rubbed a finger over the engravings. He had spent so many hours feeling those engravings after he had lost his sight - his last connection to Hera's pretty lekku patterns. He drew strength from the familiar gesture. I made it through that terrible phase of my life, I'll get through this weirdness too.

Minutes or hours later, he was still walking with no particular direction in mind and starting to forget why he was walking. He was getting tired and everything was getting a little fuzzy around the edges. Even his memories of Hera. But then a small light approaching caught his attention, causing the lost Jedi to freeze in place.

The light grew bigger and bigger. His heart filled with hope. Maybe I can get out of here after all!

Kanan's eyes widened in shock as the golden light slowly morphed into a grown up version of his Padawan that he had never actually seen in full colour before. "Ezra?" His hair was really short, he was so much taller than he remembered, he'd filled out a bit, the scars on his cheek had faded, and he walked with a calm confidence he'd never had before. Somewhere in the back of his mind, Kanan knew all these things about Ezra as he was now, but he was so befuddled from wandering, he had actually forgotten. He had been relying on his memory of Ezra as he was before losing his sight, as that was the way he pictured him in his mind automatically.

This new Ezra was a bit of a shock, if a welcome one.

He had to touch him to make sure he was real.

Ezra rolled his eyes at Kanan as he was hugged much harder than necessary, but he didn't really mind, just thankful he had actually found him. This pitch black hole Kanan was in was depressing as hell. At least Kanan looked fine, if a little confused. "Of course it's me, Master. Who else would follow you into this pit of despair?"

Kanan pulled back enough to look him up and down in a very obvious way, still hanging onto his shoulders. "But, but, I can see you!"

Ezra's eyes widened. "Really? That's great!" Now Ezra hugged Kanan, filled with joy for his Master, which he returned with interest. Stepping back before it got too awkward, Ezra posed cheekily with his hands on his hips. "So… what do you think? Am I grown up enough now?"

Kanan laughed at him. "No, you're still a brat." To which Ezra pouted jokingly. "I wonder why I can see you now?" the older man mused, tilting his head in confusion.

Ezra shrugged. "Probably because we are so deep in the Force, we are literally inside it as opposed to just being connected to it like we normally are. That's my guess anyway."

"What? Where are we?" Kanan looked around as if the darkness would provide answers. "I don't remember much. I feel like I've been wandering in here for days."

Ezra shook his head sadly. "It hasn't been days, only a couple hours. You really don't remember the shockwave of fear and death?"

At Ezra's words, Kanan's eyes widened and then he fell to his knees, crying out in anguish. Through their bond, Ezra could see Kanan's memories reappear in his mind. The exploding star cluster. Saving Hera and the Ghost. The misery of billions of people dying and how it had ripped a hole in the Force. How Kanan's open connection to the Force and his exhaustion had dragged him down into the hole. He looked up at Ezra, the weight of the death of a whole planet reflected in his face, slumped shoulders, and tone as he forlornly said, "Why did you follow me here? Now you will be stuck too."

Ezra pulled Kanan up onto his feet. "I came because you needed me. I know you would do the same for me. I believe we will get out. And I don't think it is so much a matter of getting out as repairing the hole we are in."

"Correct you are, young one." Kanan and Ezra spun to see Master Yoda limping up to them, leaning heavily on his walking stick, with, believe it or not, Ahsoka and Darth Vader following behind him. They had been so focused on each other, they hadn't noticed the new Force presences approaching. "Fix the tear in the Force we must."

"What the kriff!" Ezra and Kanan said together, glancing at each other and then gawking again at the improbable trio who came to a stop in front of them.

"Ahsoka?" Ezra asked. He hadn't seen her since they parted in the World between Worlds. He'd been worried that she'd gotten lost all this time. But she looked exactly the same and quite healthy, so that was good.

"With Vader?" Kanan continued. A Darth Vader who didn't feel like a winter storm for once. (A small hurricane, perhaps, but at least not freezing cold.)

The Togrutan shrugged, a smile twitching at the corner of her mouth. "I saved him. He saved me. I saved him again. It's a little complicated. But the short version is that he's more Anakin Skywalker again than Darth Vader and back on our side and that's all that matters."

Kanan raised a skeptical eyebrow at Master Yoda. "If you trust him…"

The ancient Master nodded. "I do. Returned to mend his wrongs Skywalker has. With this one we will start."

Vader/Skywalker huffed. "Not like I had much choice. You projected yourself into my Tie Fighter while we were in hyperspace, hit me in the knee with your stick and said, 'Meditate. Now. Your power you will use for good for once!' And then Snips agreed and here we are."

Ezra looked at Ahsoka and the smug expression she was wearing and had to work really hard not to burst into (probably uncontrollable) laughter. "Only you could work such miracles with Vader."

Ahsoka smirked wider. "What can I say? My Master has always been a sucker for my big puppy eyes."

"Too true," Vader grumbled, crossing his arms over his chestplate and looking like a massive, sulking child. "And you got us in so much trouble because I had zero ability to say no to you."

Ahsoka glanced at Yoda, mirth in her eyes. "I believe that's how our lineage has always worked, has it not? Masters running after their Padawans with unheard 'No's!' floating in the air between them?"

"Unfortunately, yes."

Kanan was outright chuckling. And even Yoda was snickering at this point. Ezra felt it was safe enough to laugh a little as well without dire consequences raining down on his head. (Like Vader's wrath.)

But then Yoda smacked Vader and everyone else in the shins with his stick with no warning and everyone instantly sobered. "Enough silliness. Heal the Force we must. Sit."

And because he said so (along with the fact that they all now had stinging shins except for maybe Vader) they all quickly sank into a kneeling pose in a circle formation.

"Just one quick question," Kanan said once they were all settled.

"Yes, Caleb?" Yoda asked, looking at Kanan with a tilt to his head.

Kanan startled a little at his original name, but then forged on. "I was just wondering, why can I see everyone in this place?

"Hmmmmmm." Yoda narrowed his glowing green eyes. "Deep in the Force we are. Projections of ourselves we are. All mental this is."

"Do you think… That I could see in real life as well?" Kanan asked tentatively. "It's just… I made a promise to Hera…"

Ahsoka looked like she wanted to say something, but Yoda spoke first. "Through the power of the Force, possible all things are, young Caleb. Have faith and you will see again."

Kanan nodded, relief radiating from him. "Thank you, Master."

Silence reigned for a couple seconds, which Ezra decided to break. "So what do we do now?"

"Concentrate. Feel the tear. Find the edge and towards you pull. Think heal and safe and calm," Yoda said matter-of-factly, as if this was just an everyday training exercise.

Ezra concentrated. He had felt the tear from the outside. He should be able to find it from the inside as well.

It ended being more slippery than one would think, and the hole felt like it was still trying to expand, but eventually Ezra got a good mental grip on an edge and started pulling it towards their group in small increments, not wanting to shock the Force anymore than necessary – it was already in so much pain. He mentally urged the Force to think about healing itself, also making him absently wonder if it really was possible to heal their own bodies in the same way.

When they had the tear down to just a small hole surrounding their projected forms, Yoda opened his eyes and caught everyone's attention. "Go. Finish I will. Done well you have, young ones."

And with a push from his mind that Ezra felt like a not so gentle hug, Yoda sent them all back to their bodies.

Smiling to himself, the ancient being finished healing the hole in the Force, then drifted in the restored Light, looking for something else to occupy his mind.

His swamp on Dagobah was a fruitful but boring place, after all.

Hmmmmm. What is my Great-Grandpadawan doing now?

Causing more chaos I see.

How fun.