A/N: Oooh so we have a Q&A now? Yey!

AngelQueen1325: Hey sweetie! To answer you question, from my own experience, colleges give you at least four core lessons, and depending on when these are, you can have a lot of half days with long empty periods in between, or simply a single lesson in the morning. It won't ever be the case of having a whole day off college in the middle of the week, but most days are like half days.


Black & White

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January crawled on by with zero contact with Levi or his fellow goths.

Eren made a point of taking the longest routes to any of his lessons, spending any free periods in the lunch hall or the library studying, and whenever he finished early, he'd simply leave. He still hadn't really forgiven his sister for ripping Levi's hoodie, however now that they'd ended whatever they'd been, he didn't feel like being mad anymore.

They hadn't discussed it; it was one of those unspoken conversations siblings seemed to have. One day they'd ask you to pass the milk and whatever they'd been fighting about would be quashed and set aside.

Not that Eren made a point of 'bouncing back' to his old self. He preferred to keep his own company of the last few weeks, not really wanting to bring other people's moods down. He liked being in the library because it meant that no one could really talk to him about things. He needed his space, some time to think about what had happened between himself and Levi. Not that there was much to think about; Levi had flipped a switch and wasn't into PDA. What else was there for Eren to get?

It had gotten to the point that Mikasa would make an extra effort to invite Eren out on the weekend with the older kids. He always brushed her concern aside and said he didn't feel up to it.

On those long weekend evenings, Eren would spend his time sat at his desk or on his bed, typing on notes on his phone or in a word document for what he would say to Levi if he ever had the guts to seek him out after what he'd done. None of it was helpful, even if Armin had insisted certain things were cathartic. Eren thought it was more frustrating than not seeing Levi. Still, he ploughed away at it, hoping that one evening he'd realise it wasn't quite as painful anymore.

That wasn't to say that he hadn't heard from Levi.

It had only take about five days for the older teen's resolve to fracture. He sent Eren a text asking if they could talk. Despite the rush of emotions Eren's husk had felt when he'd seen Levi's message pop up on his phone, the reality of what went down between them froze his fingers on his the keypad. What the hell could Levi say that would make him feel better?

Instead of replying, Eren had set his phone aside and gone downstairs to help his mum make dinner.

The follow messages from the goth all amounted to the same thing; he wanted to talk, about what, Eren refused to find out. As soon as he messaged Levi, he would lose any power he'd had in the situation. Levi had made it clear that they needed to cool things down. As far as Eren was concerned, he was giving the older teen exactly what he wanted.

By the end of the second week, Levi seemed to have given up.

'Clearly wasn't that important after all,' Eren had thought somewhat bitterly, as he and Armin studied after a pizza and video-games marathon at Armin's house on the second weekend. Despite being in his 'funny mood' as his friends had dubbed it, Eren felt a little better about being sociable, if only with his closest friends.

.

.

The following Monday brought a whole manner of issues; Eren and Mikasa's bus was late, so they were both ten minutes late into their first lessons. Eren had forgotten his assignment despite insisting that he'd finished it. He even had to swear to the teacher he'd have it emailed within the hour that he arrived home after his last lesson.

During in third period, right before lunch, Eren was scouring through his USB's and emailed to see if he had a copy of his finished assignment lurking somewhere, when a shadow fell across his desk. The hairs on the back of his neck prickled and he turned in the swivel chair.

The girl standing before him with her neon-orange hair braided around her ears, glowered down at him. "You're Eren, right?" she asked.

Frowning he nodded. "Yes … Can I help you?"

Wrapping her black painted nails around the neighbouring swivel chair, she squeezed the worn out cushion as though releasing all her anger into it. "You're friends with Levi?"

Oh shit, was this a test?

If he said 'no' he'd obviously be called out for lying but if he said 'yes' it would open a whole other world of issues, considering no one else was meant to know.

Instead, Eren asked, "Who are you?"

"I'm Isabel," she sneered as though it should have been obvious.

Eren shrugged a shoulder, "Okay. What do you want?"

"I want to know what you've said to Levi to make him in a pissy mood."

"He's always in a pissy mood," Eren deadpanned.

"More so."

Eren sighed and raked a hand through his hair. "I haven't said anything to him. I have nothing to say to him."

"Why not?" she snapped. "You're friends, right?"

"No actually," he bit out. "I think we were, at some point, but he decided that we needed to stop hanging out with each other. So if you want to ask Levi why he's being a dickweed, then you can ask him yourself."

"I'd watch your mouth, smartarse."

Eren turned back to his computer. He'd been about to shut it down, truthfully, but he wanted to make a point of not caring what the redhead had to say. Sure, he wanted to know what Levi was mad about and if it really did have anything to do with him, however Levi had made a point of not wanting to hang out with Eren anymore. It was a done deal.

"If Levi had anything to say to me, then he can come and say it to my face."

He wasn't entirely sure what Isabel's reaction was, however he did hear the distinct heavy 'clunk-clunk-clunk' of her thick soled boots as she stomped her way out of the library.

He let out a shaking breath.

Going through his emails, he found a draft he'd been working on over the last few weeks. He'd never had the gall to send it and he doubted he ever would. Whatever he had felt towards Levi had only been accelerated by the goth's physical hunger for sex. Eren was mildly surprised that the older teen hadn't gotten off with someone else already, but that was none of Eren's business. He opened the draft up, his eyes skimming over the well-versed words;

.

'Levi,

What you did to me has nothing short of shattered my self-esteem and ability to be myself. You've ruined what I once was and I despise you for that. Punching you in the nose was the least you deserved.

I feel like I was sick these last few months; spending time with you was like a sugar high despite all the sneaking around. Then the reality would hit and it would feel like a kick in the face. I don't even have anyone to vent to about all this, except in hypothetical's. You were my outlet and that just makes it worse. It's fucking pathetic!

I don't see how our situation was going to get any better. It just shows how fragile this friendship was to begin with! I was open with my feelings from day one and you used it to try and manipulate me. Yet I came back for more because I had feelings for you! You made it clear that it was never going to happen between us and yet it still plays on my mind. I was always filled with 'what if's and 'maybes'. I wish I could turn it off.

Even if you did suddenly say you had feelings for me, I'd assume it was pity at this point.

You're like a drug. You're killing me slowly but I keep coming back for another fix of you.

I just can't do it anymore. It's the first thing I think of when I wake up and the last thing I think of before bed. It plays on my mind over and over and sets my mood for the day. These past few weeks I've felt numb and keep spacing out during lessons and getting snapped at by my friends and teachers. It's sad and pathetic and hurts so damned much, but it has to stop.

Not speaking to one another is probably the best and only thing to do. I need to move on from you. I need to be with someone who want's to be with me and who doesn't just want me for an easy lay.

Regards,

Eren.'

.

His fingers itched, feeling somewhat desperate to enter Levi's email address and send him the letter. Another part of him felt as though his actions should be speaking louder than his words, however if Levi and his posse were still making the effort to seek Eren out in the library, then clearly they weren't getting the message.

Was it worth sending it? What did he hope would come of it? For Levi to suddenly change his ways and have more than two emotions?

He wished there was someone who could tell him what he should do. If he sent the email, would he be deluded to hope that Levi would understand the depth of his betrayal and plead Eren for forgiveness? Or would he simply scoff and brandish the thing all over college just to make sure that Eren was even more humiliated?

No, Eren decided, best not to send it.

He went through the same issue almost every day. Maybe one day he'd have enough balls to his the 'SEND' button, but for now, he just needed to get to the lunch hall before they ran out of pizza.

~0~

"So do you think we should invite Marco and Jean to the cinema tonight?" Mikasa asked as she unwound the red scarf from around her neck and brushed her hair out of her eyes. She focused on twisting the dial of the padlock on her locker.

Armin and Eren shared a look and frowned. "I guess we can't really exclude them just because Jean's a bit of an idiot," Armin stated with a hapless shrug. "Marco is a nice guy. It's so strange that his best friend is someone like Jean."

"Is that cool with you Eren?"

Eren rolled his eyes and shrugged. "As long as I don't have to sit next to horse-face, I think I'll be fine."

He walked down a few rows until he got to his own locker. He fumbled with the padlock –getting it open on the second try –and blinked in surprise as something slid out and landed at his feet. It took him a long second to realise that it was an envelope with his name on it. It wasn't in his handwriting –or anyone's he knew.

Damn, someone probably slipped it into his locker by mistake.

Keeping his locker door open to gain some degree or privacy, Eren opened the envelope. Inside was a single piece of card, neatly cut, with sharp, straight writing across it.

'Angsley Park at Midnight. Tonight.'

His body flushed with a prickly heat. The hairs on the back of his neck stood up on end. Despite there being nothing else on the card, Eren was almost entirely sure who it was from. His throat ran dry as he slid the note into his back pocket. He was going to the cinema after school, then maybe some food. Probably wouldn't get home until gone 11PM. Would he even be able to sneak out? Did he even want to?

He wasn't sure.

His gut twisted over and over at the prospect of seeing Levi again.

Well, he had the rest of the day to decide.

He grabbed the books he needed, slammed his locker shut and fell into step with Mikasa and Armin as they made their way toward the South building. Mikasa had a free period so she was walking along with them. They hadn't even left the main building when a flock of black-clad teens brushed through the corridor, parting other students like they were Moses and the Red sea. Eren felt himself tense, scanning the darkness for Levi.

No, he wasn't there.

That Isabel girl threw him a dark, calculating look though. He wasn't sure what it meant but he instinctively knew he didn't like it.

Mikasa sighed as soon as they were out of earshot, "I want to say some people will grow out of it, but in their case I doubt it."

Eren was about to open his mouth to argue, but thought better of it. They continued walking towards the neighbouring building in amicable silence. Mikasa waved them off; Eren went left into his Design Tech workshop and Armin went right into his Fine Art class.

~0~

As predicted, they didn't get home until about 11:06PM. The movie had been good but the pizza and drinks afterwards had been so much better. Even Jean had managed to be somewhat less of a douche, which was always a good change of pace in Eren's opinion. Although he had tried to ask Mikasa out again, which had ended as awkwardly as it always had.

When they got in, Mikasa staggered awkwardly towards the kitchen and pulled the door open. The pale illuminated a small sliver of the kitchen as she opened the carton of milk and gulped it down. Eren watched her and sniggered. She flipped him off –her fist against his nose –before leading the way upstairs. She was so knackered, she'd be out like a light within half an hour. He made sure to leave his stuff by the front door, and leave his shoe laces tied. He'd give his sister half an hour to fall asleep before sneaking out.

"G'night," Mikasa grunted as she practically fell into her bedroom.

"Night," Eren whispered as he tiptoed along the hallway to his own room. He closed the door and settled on his own bed. He could hear the TV in his parents room still on but he could hear the soft snoring of his dad, which meant that his mum would be nodding off soon, too.

He pulled out his phone and messaged Armin to sleep since he had a test the following day. He didn't get a reply. He was probably asleep.

For a brief moment, Eren toyed with the idea of texting Levi. However, the memory of their last encounter stopped him cold. He didn't really know if or what he was going to say to Levi –if it even WAS Levi writing random notes and sticking them in his locker. For all he knew he was going to get the shit beat out of his and get harvested for his organs.

was going to get the shit beat out of his and get harvested for his organs.

The time ticked away.

His mum went to bed, shutting the TV off and getting comfortable.

The house was silent.

Eren licked his lips, every sound suddenly magnifying in his ears. It was only when he heard his mum's heavy breathing that he decided it was safe enough to sneak out.

He was so nervous as he got ready; he knew all the floorboards that creaked on the staircase, and he knew just how to wrestle the door out of its frame without making it whine too loud. He still winced with every other breath, straining to hear if his actions were waking anyone up. He didn't dare to relax until he'd eased the front door closed again. He didn't lock it –that would be too noisy! Drawing in a deep breath, he hesitated. If he stepped off the porch so soon after all that noise, he'd know his mum would look out the window and see him walking down the street.

The last thing he needed was for her to chase after him and yell at him for the whole street to hear.

He shuddered at the thought and waited for another few minutes before finally setting off down the road.

.

.

Angsley Park wasn't too far from his house. He still had to walk for about ten minutes but that wasn't a huge issue. The world felt so alien at this time of night; it was a school night so most places had closed by now and the last buses were chugging through the streets, practically flying from one borough to the other. The drivers just wanted to get home to a warm supper and bed.

Hands in his pockets, Eren walked calmly down the empty streets, his senses keenly seeking the presence of anyone else around him. He made it to the park gates in one piece, only momentarily bothered by the chained gates. He gripped the cold railings with his hands and managed to haul himself up and over, the blunt spikes poking awkwardly at his thighs before he slid off the other side.

It took all of three minutes to locate Levi.

The teen was perched on top of the wooden climbing frame in the childrens park area, blowing smoke rings into the cold air.

Levi turned when he heard the crunch of Eren's trainers on the tarmac. He took a long, slow drag of his cigarette and blew the smoke out. His eyes seemed to gleam in the dark as Eren crossed the play area and climbed up so that he was on the platform a level down from Levi.

"I was starting to think you wouldn't show," Levi stated, absently toying with his lighter.

Eren shrugged, "I wanted to know why you bothered sending me that note."

Levi scoffed but didn't reply right away. "Sure, that's the only reason you're here."

"Why else would I be here?" Eren asked tightly. "It's not like I have anything to say to you anymore."

Levi blinked, seemingly stunned by the young teen's coolness. He couldn't deny it was warranted, it just simply didn't register in his brain as coming from this clumsy kid. "Is that so?" he finally ground out.

Eren sighed. "What did you want?"

"To talk."

"So talk."

Levi dropped his head back and sigh, releasing another plume of smoke. The tang hung in the air, making Eren wrinkle his nose in distaste. "I wanted to ask why you never bothered to come and piss me off since that last time."

"You told me to back off!" Eren snapped. "I'm hardly going to go out of my way to get on your bad side!"

"Tch," Levi tutted.

"Is that all you had to say? You're pissed off I actually did what you asked me to?"

"Yes and no."

"What?"

"Yes I'm pissed about that, but no that's not what I wanted to talk about." Tossing the smouldering butt aside, Levi slid off the roof of the climbing frame and dropped down so that he and Eren were face-to-face. "I want to know what Isabel said to you."

Eren frowned. "Isabel? She didn't say anything to me."

"Don't give me that shit, brat! I know she spoke to you."

"Yeah but it's not like she told me any deep dark secrets. She said you were pissy. End of!"

"You expect me to believe by best friend sought you out of all people, and didn't say anything remotely revealing?" he narrowed his grey eyes. "You're such a shit liar."

"Yeah, cause it's the truth."

Levi glared up at him. He shoved Eren back against the wooden railings, his arm firm and lethal against his chest. "Tell me the truth, brat! What the fuck did she say to you?"

"Nothing!" Eren spat. He shoved Levi off of him. All emotion had burned out of his chest as he ducked under the railing and dropped down to the padded matting below. "If that's all I snuck out for, then this shit-show really wasn't worth my time."

Levi dropped to the ground with a light thud.

The next thing Eren knew, he'd been knocked hard and went sprawling onto the cold, hard gravel. He was too stunned to react. Levi kicked him onto his side and crouched down over Eren's chest, his nails digging into the younger teens shoulders. "And to think I wanted to apologise for being a dick!" he spat.

Eren tried to wriggle free. He reached under and pinched Levi's inner thigh, making the goth hiss in pain and jerk sideways, giving Eren enough room to crawl out from under him. He straightened up and grabbed Levi's hoodie and shoved him against the wooden ladder. "If you're going to apologise, maybe say the fucking words 'I'm sorry!' instead of tossing me about, you dickhead!"

Levi glowered, his fists clenched. "Sorry? You expect me to apologise now? I may have said it after you punching me in the nose. Fuck off if you think you're getting one now!"

Eren wasn't expecting the punch to the gut.

He certainly wasn't expecting Levi kick his leg out from under him, straddle him and twist his arms up over his head. Both boys' were panting hard in the cold air. Eren was glaring up at the older teen, anger bubbling in his veins. Levi's face was very close, his breath ghosting over Eren's skin.

A shiver ran through Eren.

No, this shouldn't be even remotely enticing!

The red haze melted away.

He looked up at Levi for the first time in weeks; his hair looked a little greasy, his eyes were bloodshot and his nails –by the feel of them –were blunt. He wasn't himself. He was … miserable? A pang of guilt burrowed into Eren's heart; he had made Levi feel like that. Not without good cause, of course, but even so.

"Levi …" he breathed, and stopped. What did he want to say? Sorry? No, he wasn't really sorry for what he'd done. However, he did regret that they'd had to go through this at all. He'd missed Levi.

The goth boy in question didn't speak. His features had softened and he'd relaxed his grip on Eren's arms. He reached up and tentatively stroked a line down Eren's cheek. "Eren …" he swallowed. "I'm sorry. I didn't know how to deal with my friends finding out about what we'd been up to so … Guess I figured if there was nothing for them to find out …"

"Then you weren't betraying them."

"Exactly."

Eren rolled his eyes and shook his sore head. "You're a dick."

Levi nodded. "I know." He stood up, dusted himself off and then offered Eren a hand. He hauled the younger teen back to his feet. "Guess I can forget about seeing you again, right?"

Eren shrugged, not really knowing where they stood. "I'd like to see you Levi, but … you've not exactly been upfront with me."

"I know."

"I didn't even dare get my hopes up that you liked me and … I felt cheated."

"I know."

"I don't really know if it's wise to see each other again. Not if this is going to happen again."

"Jesus Christ, I know, okay. Fucking hell, kid," Levi snapped. "The only reason I came here was because I decided that I like you. A lot. Those few months did mean a lot, kid, and …"

"And what?"

Levi glowered up at him, but didn't say anything else. He'd said too much.

It broke Eren's heart watching the words die out in the air between them, like smoke on a breeze. He hesitantly approached the goth, his insides knotting over and over. "Levi?"

"Mmm?"

Eren bent down and wrapped his arms around Levi. The older teen tensed but didn't object as Eren placed his head in the crook of his neck and inhaled softly. "I missed you too."

Levi made a noise as though agreeing without saying the words.

"I do need you to do one thing for me, though."

"What?" he growled, the warmth of Eren's body disappearing as the teen straightened up.

"I … sort of …. Um … w-wrote you an email. Over the last few weeks. Before any of this goes any further I … I think you should read it."

"Oh? How long is it?"

"Not very. A page or so."

Levi rolled his eyes but couldn't deny the strange warmth that fizzed inside him. "Fine. Send it to me. Hopefully I can read it tonight."

Eren gave a tight-lipped nod.

Levi wanted to stay longer, but his watch beeped for 1AM. "Shit. I need to go."

"Me too."

Levi nodded towards the gates. "My car's that way."

"Okay."

Together they walked to the gates, not really speaking or touching. Eren offered to boost Levi over but the older teen just scoffed and scaled the gate as though it was as easy as breathing. Eren followed in a less graceful fashion. Levi's car was the only one parked on the road.

"It's my dads."

"He lets you drive it?" Eren asked, astonished.

"He doesn't know."

Eren shot the older teen an accusatory look but Levi shrugged him off. He opened the car and slid into the driver's seat. "I can give you a ride."

"No thanks, I'm the other way," Eren lied. In truth, he just wanted the ten minute walk to process what had just happened. "Thanks though. I'll see you at school?"

Levi looked up at Eren with a strange look in his grey eyes. Eren couldn't quite place the emotions lurking in there, but they seemed to be dark and urgent. It could have been the black eye make-up, but Eren was almost sure Levi was imagining picking up where they left off.

Another reason not to get in the car.

"Text me when you're home," Levi ordered as he slammed the car door closed. He fired the engine up and was rushing down the road before his words had sunk in to Eren's head.

Eren remained rooted to the spot until the sound of the car's engine faded into silence.

He turned on his heel and walked home.

Once he'd snuck inside, toed off his trainers at the door and made sure everything was locked up, he tiptoed back to his room and changed into his pyjamas in the dark. Sliding into the cool covers, he pulled his phone into his bundle and text Levi.

.

[1:48] Home now.

[1:50] Good.

.

Eren ground his teeth together. Just before he went to sleep, he logged onto his emails on his phone and found the draft. He hesitated for a few minutes before typing Levi's address into the recipient box.

This time he didn't hesitate.

He hit 'SEND'.


A/N: Ah, teenagers. When will they learn? :P As usual I'm happy to answer any questions! x