A/N: Getting back in the groove was rough, jeez. Maybe it's just because that (Spoiler) this was a very slow chapter as you might expect from the subtle hinting of last chapter. Very dialogue heavy, pretty rough to write admittedly. Hope it stands up with the previous chapter or two.
Let's just get on with the fanmail, there's a lot to get through.
Blaze2121: Well we can't have Anonydeath without Ultradimension, can we? I have the feeling that despite my continued protests, Sadie and her misfit gang of CPUs will be relevant at some point. I have to get there first, of course.
Xbox432: Absolute boner of an error there, thanks for pointing it out. I'll also take the time to reply to your other comment that you posted by mistake (No worries.)
I think Chapter 11 has been my favourite of the bunch so far. So much drama, action and banter all mixed up into one meme-fest of a package. And I have no idea how the fuck I pulled that off. And yes, Linda is as useless yet sneaky as ever. I wonder if this will come into play?
Probably not. Linda's a joke.
EnderSoul1401: Neptune's proverbial shit is just like Koei's: Charming until it isn't! I think she's just exaggerating to get on Koei's good side, honestly.
As for UD IF… Jeez that will be awkward. Or would it? Fear of THE GREAT LADY SADIE aside, they're practically the same. Or maybe I haven't played enough RB3. (Which I have been doing sporadically between last update and this one. IF's utter crap by the way, she is not suited for even the midgame, jeez. Meanwhile Kei is just carrying the team. One letter off Koei, I wonder if there's a connection.)
Alright, I've left you all anticipating for long enough. ON. WITH. THE. DRINKING!
By the time we arrived back in Planeptune, the sun was already setting over the horizon. To be fair, it also gave the ivory towers an orange hue, giving the area some more variety of visual flair. Of course, this wasn't the main reason for coming back to Planeptune at such an hour (And neither was the convenience of being able to crash at the Basilicom, thanks Histoire!)
That would be partaking in the greatest of pastimes: Alcoholism! (The cause of and the solution to all of life's problems.)
Following IF through the rapidly thinning streets of Planeptune, we didn't really say anything as I followed her. It would have been awkward if it wasn't for the fact that I was pretty tired from the earlier fight and I think she noticed and just let me be.
Eventually, IF stopped in front of a… Very different looking building. It concentrated the clean nature of Planeptune by simply not having any white on it. In fact, it was purple and black all throughout, with the purple neon letting it stand out amongst the black tiling covering the building.
The sign marking the name of this place was more of a bright pink neon with the word "CE1 EST-1A"
"Celestia, huh?" I turned to IF, who was about to enter the building, She turned back with a shrug before walking in, leaving me out and gather my thoughts for a moment. Certainly looked like the sort of hipster place that IF would frequent and seemed fairly quiet to boot. I took a deep breath and followed IF into the building.
The first thing that hit me was the smell. It wasn't a bad smell by any means, it just smelled off in some way. Probably the cleaning supplies leaving that behind. Looking around, the interior matched the exterior well, with the dim lighting of the bar contrasting well with the neon pink wall lights. The bar itself shot for a nice cyberpunk theme to it. IF was sat at the bar already, but the bar itself was unattended.
Sitting down next to IF, the stool felt comfortable but still supported my weight well had enough resistance to not sink entirely, letting it reform easily after use. Perfectly functional if not too interesting. The bar itself was a pretty standard metal lump to place your drinks on, complete with a chrome finish to get a nice reflection of your awful, awful face.
I did take a look though. It seems that aside from the bandage across the top of my head covering the claw wound, I looked the same. Might need a shave, though. In the dark I couldn't tell if my hair had changed colour from the usual dirty blonde. Oh well, I was never one for personal care anyway. Maybe it's due to not seeing people much back then.
Or it could be the concussion.
"Customers? Well shit. Time to mix drinks and change lives." came an unfamiliar voice, strolling in with a class in one hand and a glass filled with said cloth in the other. Her face showed one that really didn't scream anything but "I've been through some shit" with a glint of "I hate my job but hey it's a living." Her attire was simply some bartender fare, a black (or was it blue?) tuxedo accented with a red tie. The only other notable features were her ebony hair in a ponytail complete with sideburns and her ruby red eyes that contrasted well with IF's eyes.
Oh right, I'm supposed to be on a da- drinking session, I should pay attention to her. Glancing at IF, she had her hand underneath the chin and leaned on the bar with a wry smile on her face. "Sick of me already, Koei? Thought you said we had a connection?" She teased. Got me there.
"Uh yeah, just weird to see a non-generic NPC working here." I mutter little commitment to what I was actually saying. This was going to be a long night, wasn't it?
It was about then that the atmospheric music kicked in. I thought it was oddly silent in here.
(Current music: Welcome to VA-11-HALL A - VA-11 HALL-A OST)
"Welcome to Valhalla." the barkeep said as the music had time to settle down and become atmospheric rather than jarring. "What can I get you two?"
"My usual, Jill." IF ordered, before turning to me. "As for Koei… Well, I think a Beer would do him."
"Coming right up, IF." Jill turned around and started throwing several coloured liquids and then pouring them into a glass, then repeating the process, albeit with a different order. a few moments later, Jill turned back with a Beer in one hand and a strange red drink in a martini glass in the other.
"There you go. 450 Credits." I pulled out some Credits and handed them to Jill, before placing the cash in the register. As for the Beer itself, it was pretty much a beer. That orange liquid topped with a head of froth made my mouth water slightly as I took a good long sip. It was as you expected, pretty good, though it didn't really have anything to set it apart from similar beer. It would do for getting me hammered, with the day I've had…
"You ever had to fight a giant robot lobster, Jill?" I ask the bartender, some exasperation in my voice as I set down the glass, IF giving me a sympathetic glance before going back to her own drink.
"Coming out of the gates swinging, huh?" Jill cleaned her glass while giving a half-lidded look. "Can't say I have. Can't say that I know anyone else has either."
I pointed a thumb towards IF. "She did. Fuckers hurt by the way. Superheated lobster claws are not very good for your face."
"I figured as much." Jill put down her now cleaned glass and picked up another dirty one. "You're an adventurer, then?"
"Yup, I'm a glorified hobo." I took another drink. "Though I do have a place to crash for the time being, which is useful for saving credits. How about you, Jill, how do you make a living?"
"I mix drinks and change lives." She stated simply. "Not really much to it. You listen, you talk, you throw out shitty clients. Then you go home and drink your cheap Beer that you buy in bulk from the store and talk to your cat."
"Sounds about right." Silence fell between the three of us momentarily. It was weird to be in a situation where we could talk in peace for once. No fighting, no global politics. Just relaxing after a long day of work with a drink and a friendly face.
"So, I'm liking the look of this place." I make small talk while waiting for the alcohol to kick in."Really sets this place apart from other places here in Planeptune."
"Yup. Bringing some of that Glitch City charm to Gamindustri. Just without the smell of dog piss." Jill cleaned another glass, tone unchanging as her unreadable face started into my nearly empty glass. "Another round? You seem to be someone who wants to forget."
"Sure." IF spoke up, attacking our attention. "What, did you forget about me?"
If there was proper lighting, my blushing would have been easily visible. It might have been barely visible in the light, but I was too busy trying to read IF's current expression. She seemed unimpressed.
"My bad, IF. Just fascinating to meet new people."
IF waved me off. "Don't worry about it, thought it'd be a good time to get a refill. I'll pay this time for being a bother. I j-just… Nevermind." IF's blush could have fit in with the neon surrounding the walls. Getting up, she walked outside.
Turning to Jill for a moment, I saw her eyebrow raise before coming back down. I could almost hear her inner monologue saying "yikes", but I'm sure that was the Beer kicking in.
"Well, I'm sure you enjoyed the Beer as a starter, but would you like to try anything else, Koei?"
Looking to the menu, I saw various cocktail names. Fringe Weaver, Mercuryblast, Brandtini (Which I think was what IF ordered), Bad Touch…
"BAD TOUCH?!" My inner teenager nearly burst out laughing at the hilariously inappropriate name of the drink. I swear I saw Jill's composure nearly break down too.
"T-that'll be 250 Credits. Anything else?" I handed over the Credits as she handed the drink. It was very green and served in a tall glass with ice. It looked as bad as the naming was, truthfully.
"Uh yeah… Do you know IF's favourite drink? It doesn't seem that the drink she ordered would be one of her favourites. I'll pay for it, of course."
Jill put a free hand to her chin thoughtfully. "Well, there is one drink that she orders when she's feeling down… Give me a minute." She got to work as IF returned, face noticeably less beetroot than before, looking confused at my Bad Touch and the fact that Jill was working on another drink.
"Sorry about that, I had to er… Call Compa and tell her I'd be back later. Yeah, that's it." I could barely see the blush on her face at this point, but she was coming back to her usual self.
It was at this time that Jill finished the process of her latest concoction. The glass was notably wider than mine, but just as tall, possibly to accommodate more ingredients. The "drink" itself was a cyan blue that reminded me of Lowee, topped with a flower ornament stuck to the side of the glass, making it look fancier but not impeding the glass itself.
"320 Credits, if you don't mind." Jill asked for payment and I handed it over dutifully. These drinks were stacking up in cost, but I had enough to splurge a bit, I felt. Money doesn't buy happiness, but alcohol can lead to it!
"A… Piano Woman?" IF looked at me with a half-hearted glare. "You asked Jill, didn't you."
"Bartender confidentiality." Jill stated simply. "Can neither confirm nor deny who ordered that drink." She turned a gave a sly wink to me before starting to clean out another class. IF rolled her eyes before taking a drink of her Piano Woman, seeming to gain a ghost of a smile in the process.
"Ahh Compa, where did the time go?" IF muttered to herself, reflecting on times gone by for a moment before snapping back to reality. I for my part, chose to ignore that and take a sip of my Bad Touch and-
Well first impressions are always important and this drink certainly left a memorable one. Have you ever had one of those sour sweets? You know the kind, the ones coated in sugar to mask the fact that they're essentially gelatin lemons? Take those, remove the sugar, blend them into a drink, add alcohol and you have a Bad Touch.
I regained consciousness… eventually and took a look at the drink. It was still there, as were IF and Jill. They weren't worried as much as trying to hold in their laughter.
"What's wrong Koei?" IF smirked, clearly enjoying my pain. "Did you get a Bad Touch?" Which would have been a perfectly innocuous question had it not been for the name of the drink.
For my part I rolled my eyes and braced myself as I took another drink. After the initial shock, it honestly wasn't that bad. It even had a classy sort of touch to it, like a brandy or some of that expensive wine. Just you know, wrapped inside a lemon.
"Keep laughing, this is actually… Kinda alright." Cue more barely restrained laughter from IF as I slowly placed my face into my hands. I did this to myself.
(Current Music: Snowfall (VA-11 HALL-A OST)
Eventually the laughter died down and silence reigned over the bar, aside from the jukebox of course. I had finished off the Bad Touch (snrk) and was waiting for it to kick in before ordering another. Just because I had a long day didn't mean I was going to force IF to carry me home.
Looking at IF, she was taking her time with her Piano Woman, taking occasional glances to her phone before putting it away and looking back at Jill, who had ran out of glasses to clean and was just keeping an eye on us. Nobody wanted to be the one to break the silence, it seemed.
"So… IF." I initiate small talk, as much as I would like the silence, this was meant to be a date… I mean drinking session. "Where did your name come from?"
IF took a moment to finish off her Piano Woman. No really, she took what must have been easily a third of the drink and chugged it down before wiping her mouth with her sleeve. "You know how I use fire magic and am a spellblade? There's a reason for that."
"Oh?"
"You might have gathered that IF is just a codename I use. My name isn't "Miss Factory" either, that's just a cover-up to keep people off my back when I have to use my "full" name." Here comes the big secret reveal.
"Then what is it?"
"My name is Ifrit. Named after the legendary fire demon. Because I'm a descendent of his. My mother was human and he was my father."
My jaw dropped. "Holy sweet fuck, are you serious?"
Silence. IF's expression started to change. "Y-y-y-" She then broke down into an even harder laughing fit, nearly falling off of her stool. "NO! Could you imagine? I can't believe you fell for that!"
I looked at Jill, who had her usual unreadable expression. "She's a bit of a lightweight." She clarified. I could tell. "Might want to make this next one your last before you end up escorting her home."
"Sure thing." I took a look at the menu as the hysterical laughter died down. "Guess I can get something sweet to wash down the Ba- last drink I had." Didn't want to set the less than sober IF off again. "I'll take two Moonblasts."
This prompted a nod from Jill. "Large Moonblast, what about the lady friend?"
"I'll take a large Piledriver!" IF yelled, clearly not calm from her previous drinks. "If you're only letting me have one more drink, I might as well go full tilt!"
I looked at Jill and she gave me a "God help you" look as she started making our drinks. She finished the Moonblast and passed it to me. It was similar to the Bad Touch, but pink rather than green and served in a large glass due to ordering a larger one. IF's drink on the other hand, could only be described as pure liquid manliness with a squeeze of orange.
Taking a sip of my Moonblast, it tasted like you'd expect a pink drink to taste: liquid diabetes. The overwhelming sugar content overpowered the other flavours of the drink (Though I did taste a smidgen of strawberry, but that could be the placebo effect.) but it still tasted nice.
IF on the other hand, took a swig of her Piledriver and it looked like she was having a much worse time, barely being able to keep the drink in her mouth. The karmic justice was kind of cute with her making fun of me for having a Bad Touch so I didn't mind revelling in it. She did eventually swallow down her first swig, then took a look at what remained and looked at me with a look of "Help, this is too much for me."
I pretended to ignore her. The alcohol content in that looked way too high for me. Plus if I still felt if I needed a drink, I could pull a Koei Kombo when I got back to the Basilicom. But for now, I enjoyed my liquid diabetes.
"So do you get any other customers, Jill?" I asked quizzically. It felt like it had been a while, but I haven't bothered to check my watch since coming in and didn't really want to see how late it was now.
"Not really." Jill replied, shrugging internally. "I mean you're the first new customer in weeks. Back in Glitch City I got like, 3-4 clients a day, about 2 of those were new maybe? Here in Gamindustri, I get IF sometimes, some clearly underaged girl who asks for "Pudding" not realizing this is a bar and her sister who always apologizes and buys an alcohol free drink as an apology. She's a nice kid. Anyway, if it wasn't for the absurdly low rent for this place, I'd probably have shut down within the month."
"Yeah I think the rent's cheaper because of adventurers. Not really a consistent paycheck so they just like keeping things fair. Do you at least make a profit?" I did take a business class briefly at one point, so I'm not entirely dense when it comes to running a business. Just mostly.
"A few thousand Credits a month. Enough to keep the place stocked, as well as enough for me to live off of. Nothing grand, but it's a living."
"Amen to that. I'd offer to come work here, but it doesn't seem like you'd even recoup the cost of hiring me even if I brought in all my friends."
"That and you're not qualified. Celestia is kinda weird when it comes to who works behind the bar. Due to how the mixing of drinks works. Can only get a certificate in Glitch City way on the PC continent, probably part of why this is the only place like this in Gamindustri."
"Uh, you two gonna wrap up your business talk or what?" IF had finished off her Piledriver and was stood up, not swaying too much as to be noticable, but I could see her easily doing so once the Piledriver hit. Finishing off my Moonblast, I made sure I had everything on me.
"Well, been nice meeting you Jill, If I'm ever in the mood for a drink and a talk again, I'll pop around."
"I'd appreciate the business." Jill replied simply, giving a small smile. "You pay right off the bat and don't spend the whole evening on one drink, that's good enough for me."
And with that, IF and I left CE1 EST-1A and went back to the Planeptune night.
(End Song)
The cold Planeptune evening hit us both as we exited, the buildings being a shining becon of hope against the opressive darkness. IF for her part, did look a fair bit more dishevelled against the bright lights of Planeptune.
"Come on, let's get you home first. I can stumble my way back to the Basilicom." I told IF. She glared at me for a moment, before walking off in no particular direction, me walking alongside her to make sure she was alright.
A few minutes and we hit an apartment complex. IF would have hit it literally if I didn't stop her. Seemed to be fairly generic, the same purple and white decor slapped around a big ol' tower, complete with an intercom because letting random people walk into an apartment complex is a no-go, captain.
IF pressed a button out of the several rows worth, and we sat in silence and waited for the dial tone. Eventually, someone picked up.
"Hello? Iffy?" Compa's voice was on the other end. She sounded slightly worried at best. "Did you go out drinking without telling me? Oh I'll come down right away!" and the line went dead.
IF for her part, seemed to lose her cool a little bit. I saw a sweat drop form on her cheek before she turned to me. "For both our sakes, you should probably get back to the Basilicom. Or the bar. Either way, away from here. Compa is not someone you want to annoy."
Seemed like a fair enough reason. Still, I wanted to make this night memorable. Against my better judgement (Who needs that when you have alcohol?) I wrapped my arms around IF. After a moment of two of silence (and feeling the blazing heat from her blushing), she hugged me back. "See ya, IF."
"See ya, Koei." She curtly replied, before I made like a tree and got the hell outta there before shit went down. I checked my watch for the first time in a while. 7:30pm, huh?
Guess I could do with another drink.
Returning back to CE1 EST-1A was a brisk and uneventful walk, though I did hear girlish yelling from behind me as I walked, poor IF is going to feel that in the morning. That and the hangover.
(Current music: Every Day is Night - VA-11 HALL-A OST)
Still, reentering the cyberpunk bar, I spotted Jill serving another customer.
The girl (I presume at this point that anyone who wasn't a generic looking NPC was female. It's just how this world works.) had blue hair, pretty much everywhere. That with the contrasting red, very justice looking scarf made her stand out at least. All I could really tell aside from that at the angle I was at was her black, zip-up jacket and her assets… Or lack thereof. Maybe breast- best not to bring that up.
"... And that's how I saved the Netherworlds from Overlord Void Dark and his motley crew, single handedly!" The girl seemed to have some form of ego, but with a chest like that…
"Ah, Koei. Welcome back." Jill greeted casually, done with the girl's shit, apparently. Or it would seem that way. "Back to order another drink? You really want to forget today."
I gave a nonchalant shrug. "I mean my day wasn't awful, but if I ever see lobster again, I'm jamming Serenity right through it and never looking back."
"I'll take that as "I'll take a Beer."" Jill replied curtly as I nodded, before turning to my fellow drinker, who seemed to be eyeing me up and down with a curious look. A bit too much at my chest, though…
"Do you have something wrong with your voice box, miss?" She asked me, as if that was a normal thing to ask.
"Which is more likely, I'm a female who has a male voice, or I'm one of the few competent males in this entire goddamn universe?" I shot back rhetorically. Though at this point, either answer was pretty valid. Or maybe it was the concussion.
"Hmm, suppose you're right. Sorry about that. Let me buy your drink for you as an apology." How nice. It did save me a few credits, at least.
"So, you know my name already, but let's greet formally. Koei. Koei Tech. Professional Hobo and Sociopath with a Spellblade."
Somewhere I felt a disturbance. I think Neptune was laughing for whatever reason. Clearly I needed this drink for the sake of my sanity.
"Well, I'm Nisa. Heroine of Justice!" She greeted happily with a mock salute, before extending her hand out for a shake. "Always nice to see a fellow adventurer fighting for justice."
"Eh, I don't do it out of pride or justice or whatever." I admitted. "It's just a way to get paid and make friends. I mean, somehow I've managed to get a Planeptune Staff ID a week in, so now I crash with the CPU of Planeptune."
"Heh. Not too many people can claim to be buds with Neptune." Nisa remarked as she received her own drink, a large green… thing in one of those fancy cocktail glasses, you know the ones with fruits jammed at the top? Kinda shaped like a lamp? Yeah, that one.
It looked nice enough anyway. Meanwhile I had a standard old Beer. Hey, if it ain't broke…
"Yeah, should probably keep that fact low-key. I've already made a few enemies just by existing, so I can't imagine what hell I'd go through if I accidentally told everyone that I've somehow befriended all the CPUs… Goddammit." The words slipped right out of my mouth.
"Something tells me that fact will slip out eventually." Jill remarked, cleaning yet another glass. It's like an obsession at this point. "You can't just be popping around all four Nations, doing good deeds and making friends with important people without arousing some suspicion." Sad truth of life, really.
"Well, aside from that, world peace should be resolved soon." I rolled my eyes. "Can't really call this a war when it's more a global disagreement."
"You think that's weird? I thought alongside Neptune and the others to defeat the Deity of Sin and ASIC before I got sucked into a world of demons and angels. So I end up finding a portal back to Gamindustri, see Neptune for the first time in what felt like years, give her a hug… And she looked at me like I was a complete stranger. Really hurt, that did."
"And that's why you're here, drinking?" I reason rather reasonably She simply gave a curt nod before taking a sip of her drink. "Well, that's a complete shitter. But with all this dimensional fuckery I've been hearing about, you could just be in a version of this dimension where you didn't exist."
Nisa's eyebrow rose for a moment, before coming back down. "Not even the craziest thing I've heard this week. Did you hear the one about the guy who took a superheated lobster claw to the face?"
"I am that guy." I pointed to my still bandaged head. "Kind of worrying that people already know about that."
"Wouldn't worry about it." Nisa patted me on the back. "Any and all rumors are anonymous anyway, and most people just dismiss them are hearsay. I was going to dismiss it too, but it seemed to hold a little more weight."
"I could see that. It smacked White Heart pretty hard when it jumped into her. Oh, you mean a different kind of weight?" I joked, finally getting into my element with some alcohol down my throat.
"It felt more like reality, surprisingly. I dunno, when you hear so many reports of robots in as short of time as I have, you start to think there's something connecting them."
"Love-stricken robot dude named Anonydeath who wants Noire to himself." I stated factually. Screw that guy in particular, he's tried to kill me twice in two days.
"Love makes people do crazy things?" Nisa shugged."In my time I've seen one guy make a universe spanning army for it, and another take them down for the same reason. This is why I work with justice, not love."
"Make that two of us, sister." I chinked my glass with hers. "Though I must admit despite that, I think I've already fallen for someone."
Jill raised an eyebrow. "You don't mean that IF girl you were with earlier?"
I nodded. "It's kinda weird how quickly it escalated though. One day we were calling each other arsonist and stalker in a sorta joking way, the next we were kinda just running into each other and having fun just chatting… One thing leads to another and I find myself having a crush on her. Is that weird?"
"Love works the way it does, I guess." Jill had at this point, stopped cleaning and started leaning on the countertop. "Seems like you two just like each other, you know? You simply enjoy having the other around. That could blossom into love, or you two could remain friends. Just… Try not to leave them on a sour note. Chances are that'll be the last thing you say."
"You sound like you speak from experience, Jill." I noted, the room growing notably heavier. I think I regret bringing this up now.
"Oh it's… Nothing." she didn't want to make eye contact anymore. "You just learn things as a bartender. Nothing more."
Specific denial aside, I think this drink was enough alcohol until I got back to the Basilicom. "Well, lovely to meet you Nisa and it was great to see you too Jill. I'll be on my way."
"See ya!" Went the pair, as I stumbled out of the bar with all the grace of a slightly shit-faced 20 something who clearly thought their tolerance was higher than it was.
(End Song)
Making my way back to the Basilicom, a new pair of guards well, guarded the way in, but a quick flash of my Staff ID was all I needed for them to grant me access, thank fuck. Sure I still had plenty of Credits, but that doesn't mean I want to be wasting them willy-nilly on anything but the most vital expenses.
Heading up the elevator, I checked my watch. 9PM? Time really does fly when you're having fun.
"Nep Jr.~ I need your superior gaming skills again!~" Neptune called out as I exited the elevator, slightly queasy from the speed it travelled. Certainly will have to watch my limit next time.
Walking out, the adorably pouty Neptune greeted me, looking for her sister so she could cheese something or other. "Hey Nutjob, how was your day?"
"Awful. Histy got Pissty and made me do work, then this stupid game started cheating and I can't find Nep Jr. ANYWHERE!" I can't believe I have to live with this girl.
"And as for YOUR snarky inner monologue, well I have no time for it! Go drink your Krappy Kombos or whatever, I have a sister to find!" Neptune stomped off, uncharacteristically angry from some reason.
Ducking into what I presumed was Neptune's room, I noticed the source of her anger. Obviously she had a game console (Surrounded by empty pudding cups, of course.) with that same dopey beanbag Dogoo chair and two controllers plugged into a game system I had never seen before. Okay so why does Neptune play her own console? Isn't that counterintuitive…
Oh whatever, I approached the console and picked up the controller. It reminded of a controller I saw myself once, but it was different. A large purple N was the main selling point on it, but it also had a D-Pad, four face buttons and two central buttons that I presumed were Start and Select, topping off with two shoulder buttons.
This wasn't the controller I was thinking of, but I was more familiar with the general concept of it, as it was the basis for more modern controllers at least.
The game itself looked to be a 2D RPG. Not a top-down view as you might expect, but a side scrolling RPG. To be fair, it also looked really pretty considering what controller I was using. Looked more like a living painting than a game. The actual gameplay seemed to be more action oriented than your typical RPG, which used a timer based attack system rather than turn based.
The oddest thing about this game was that it had Neptune in it herself. I know that she's the CU of Planeptune and it's her console and all, but this is way too literal. I checked the play time and Neptune was only what, an hour into this game? She seemed to be in a volcano area and was near a big Dogoo, but with the WTF factor turned to 11, with the evil, sharp grin it had. It was also very orange, so I assumed that a large orange thing in a volcano meant it was made out of lava.
Of course, I checked her inventory and skills too. Surprisingly few items but the real kicker was that she had an ice skill. Glacis Edge was a little on the nose.
Still, equipping that, I tackled the enemy head on. I won't bore you with the details, but after my first attack, my gauge refilled due to me using a "Weak" attack on it. I assume that mean that it was weak to the I just end up mashing attack until I won. I didn't understand whatever the hell I got or the plot significance of that monster, but hey I did better than Neptune on a video game.
Getting up from my throne, I saw Neptune, with a new tub of pudding with her sister and I nearly fell over in shock. Or maybe that was the concussion. Or the drink.
"Pretty swish playing, Protag! What was your secret?" Neptune seemed impressed at my basic understanding of type advantage. Which was weird because in the series I played most when I was younger, Ice did less damage than fire. I mean that makes logical sense, ice just straight up melts.
Whatever, video game logic. I shanked a fucking robot lobster with a glorified cattle prod and was cured of my convulsing by a magic yellow pill, I have no high ground here.
Oh right, Neptune. "Uh yeah, just use elemental weaknesses and that should do you good?" I shrugged. Honestly at this point I was pretty wasted, so any amount of strategy that could be gleamed was pure dumb luck. My favourite kind.
"Well, I guess I should have sorted that out beforehand. Thanks Protag!" Neptune waved off before sitting down and looking at her haul.
To be honest, I don't think that hellish abomination was even plot-relevant.
Heading over to bed, I checked my UI gloves for any interesting news (Not really), and promptly tucked myself in. I just felt exhausted after today, honestly.
I was out like my light. Someone turned it off anyway. I wanted to say thanks, but they just shut the door and left me be. I think it was Nepgear. I really should thank her.
What a day. After all that I think I'll take tomorrow off.
A/N: You and me both, Koei. You and me fucking both. And yes, I did just technically make this a Neptunia/VA-11-HALL-A/Disgaea crossover. Will Nisa and Jill make future appearances?
Maybe. I don't think I got her character down right and she kinda just turned into "IF but from an alternate dimension." Jill less so, but that's because Jill is Jill and Jill is probably partially where I got my writing style for Koei from.
Don't look at me like that. VA-11-HALL-A is fucking amazing and I wish I could write a tenth as well as that game is written.
But yes, wew. Pretty beefy chapter. I was going to end it after IF was escorted home, but then I realized that it was kinda way too short for how long you've been waiting. Praise the flat saviour Nisa, master of madding chapters!
(All you did was write drinking scenes! -Neptune)
They're harrrrd.
(Then write actual plot things. - Neptune)
But those are harrrrrrd.
(Why can't I win with you. - Neptune)
Hey I put you in this chapter at least.
(Ugh, fine. You win. See you next update. - Neptune)
With my pace, it'll be out in 2020! See you then!