A/N: I have nothing. MAILBAG.

Blaze2121: Not gunblades, just normal guns. At least until Serenity returns anyway. Koei is becoming more and more edgy by the day. Iffy needs more floof though, I concur.

Adstradea: That was one of the hardest things about writing this, keeping Koei competent while not making him Kirito-Chirst incarnate who can fart his enemies away.

I mean, I like That Time I Got Reincarnated as A Slime, but that was one of the things that made me kind of drop it mid-season. Oops.

But yeah, that dragon was just old. More of a reference to it being from a time before CPUs than anything. (They get wiped out quickly after when CPUs destroy the ecosystem.)

Incognito Doom: That is exactly the reference I was going for. God, what a good song…

Right, chapter time. See ya.

Twirl, twirl, twirl…

Okay, that got boring fast. Twirling Peace and Tranquility around is only fun for 10 minutes at most. Still, I was housebound until further notice, thanks to Mana Burnout.

Wait, was I? Or was I just assuming based on the fact that I no longer have Serenity and nobody wanted to tell me its location?

I mean they probably don't want me going out while recovering… But screw the rules, I have guns now! I'm going to Lastation, baby!

Lastation's cancer-filled air filled my lungs as I stepped out of the subway station. With my suit set to Kei Blue, I did blend in nicely with the crowd, which was nice for my purposes of trying not to be caught out.

Still, me coughing up my lungs was in fact, pretty conspicuous so it didn't really matter either way. Still, I did feel pretty tired out just from the subway, so I found a nearby cafe and went in.

Function was the name of the game here. Metal plating covered the walls, most of it not even bothering to be aligned with itself. The chairs were similarly DIY'd together, which was an impressive feat, even if it meant each chair looked hella uncomfortable to actually sit on.

Still, I made my way to the counter, which was similarly slapped together. "So I assume you built this on a budget?" I chat up the unsurprisingly female attendant.

She gave a wry grin. "Well, it cost me less than 5000 credits, along with being a good talking point, so I say the hard work paid off." She seemed proud of her work. "Say, I don't get many business types around here. Too afraid of getting their suits dirty with the grime of actual work, ya know?"

I looked down at my suit, forgetting that I was wearing it. Hey, it was cozy as hell, cut me some slack. "Oh yeah, this. My other clothes are in the wash, so I have to wear this for the time being. Not a business type, just splurged on it due to the adjustable colours. I want to be a walking strobe light one day."

The girl politely chuckled at that statement. "I see, I see. Say, you look like someone I know. Were you on the news recently?"

Uh oh. "N-no. Say, can I have a coffee to go? I forgot I had a quest to turn in." I didn't really need to be recognized when I'm still healing.

Still, the clerk brewed coffee and after paying for it and politely said goodbye, I left the ramshackle store. It was nice, as was the clerk. If I liked Lastation more, I might go there more often.

Still, this left me with a coffee and a wandering mood. Didn't really explore Lastation the last time I was here, mostly due to being slashed in the chest type reasons. You know, the usual.

Aside from the air, Lastation was busy, but not so busy as to choke the streets with traffic. Yes, the perfect place to hang about without arousing suspicion. Aside from my own choking, that is.

Jesus this place needed better filters. Feel like I'd get lung cancer long before I got liver cancer if I lived here. Still, for what little I could see before I hit smog, it was nice.

Still, I tried to remain inconspicuous. That close call with the barista showed that I was gaining a reputation and due to my introverted nature, I did not need this. Not at all. Being recognized for the work I do, is fine. But I don't need to be a celebrity on the level of the CPUs. I don't even have a second form I can be incognito in, so being recognized and mobbed on the street would be bad for my… everything.

For now though, I was blending in well. Unfortunately, it seemed that my time of being hidden was at an end, as I slipped out of the crowd and recognized a certain CPU Candidate outside what seemed to be a weapon store.

Fortunately, as Uni was looking at the store window, I had the chance to slip away. But to where? I'm already out of the crowd and would cause a commotion if I tried getting back in. Also I don't want to go back there.

Wait, can't glass refle- goddammit she turned around.

"K-Koei?" Uni was shocked at my appearance. I mean, I would be too, she probably heard the news from Nepgear. "I thought you were in a coma?"

"Yeah but I got better." I shrugged. "I mean as bad as this sounds, it's not my first coma."

Uni put a gloved hand to her chin thoughtfully. "That makes sense I guess. Still, what brings you to Lastation on this… Day?" Seems that Uni couldn't see the sky for the smog either. Maybe that'll spur her to do something about this.

"Got bored, nobody told me where Serenity was, then NepG gave me these puppies." I pulled out Peace and Tranquility and handed one of them for Uni to inspect.

For some reason, she got really excited. "W-Wow! Is that a plasma battery attachment that gives each individual bullet a plasma aura that can shred through defense by itself?"

I uh… "This is NepG's, not mine. All I know is that it makes pew noises and it has a weird purple thing after I fire it."

Uni nodded her head in conformation. "I see. You said Nep… G made this?"

Oh, they didn't really know each other that well, did they? "Nepgear, my bad."

Uni's eyes seemed to sparkle with the mention of that name. "Ah, Nepgear! We got on so well in Leanbox, I really wish I could see her again… But Noire wants to keep me in Lastation until Gamindustri recovers from the shock of the Nations making peace."

At the very least, that went well. Phew, thought my near-death experience would have fucked that up somehow.

"Well, NepG seems to be doing fine, if that makes you feel any better." I relayed, this seemed to please the Candidate, as her mood lightened a little.

"G-great!" Uni took the time to hand Tranquility back. God I love that name. "Say, I've got a Quest to do and I couldn't ask big si- Noire to help as she's still doing paperwork. Would you mind coming to help me out?"

Part of me wanted to say "Are you fucking nuts I just came out of a fucking coma", but Uni meant well by what she said and she was still young and inexperienced.

That and I really needed an excuse to fire off Peace and Tranquility. No point having these if I can't fill something with lead and plasma, right?

"Sure, as long as it doesn't involve a dragon or anything like that." I noted. Dragons are going to give me PTSD, I swear.

"N-no, nothing like that! Heh. Just some derelict factory is showing some life. Going to put down whatever's making noise in there."

Jesus fuck Uni. "Brutal." I note simply. "I suppose a pair of plasma firing pistols would fry any robots if we happen to find some in there."

Uni nodded in agreement. "I concur. Then let us go." She then marched off, thankfully away from the crowds of people in the Lastation streets. I followed closely behind to keep up.

As it turns out, Lastation is an actual shithole. I thought the smog was bad in the more general walking areas around the subway and Basilicom. That is nothing compared to the industrial area. As Uni and I headed towards it, I ended up breathing so much polluted air that I felt like if I vomited, it'd as dark as Uni's dress.

This is why I now had a cloth covering my nose and mouth, anyway. It's not a perfect solution, but considering my weakened state, I wasn't taking any chances in what the locals call "BlackLungstation."

Uni was completely fine with this, however. CPUs are weird. She even shot me a look of pity when I went into a nearby store to buy this Lastation branded cloth that is sold for the express purpose of keeping your smog inhalation down.

And the fact that I have to get one of these kind of proves how badly Lastation needs an environmental reform sooner rather than later. I'm blaming Kei for this, she seems like the kind of person to drive efficiency this high and with Noire's eye for overwork, she would probably miss something like this.

Still, we eventually made it to the abandoned factory. "Time Splitter LTD." it was called. Unsurprisingly, they made clocks before being shut down once more digital clocks came about. Seems they couldn't adapt to the evolving tastes of their customer base.

At least, that's what I assume happened. For some reason, I feel something like this happened back home, but like most things, I can't really explain why I think that way. It bothers me, somewhat.

Oh well. We inspected the main entrance, which was unsurprisingly bolted shut. It was a derelict factory. Still, we needed a way in, so I started to make my way around.

I was inspecting to see if there was a less bolted entrance when I heard shots from around the corner. Running back to the entrance, Uni was there with a smoking barrel and a perfectly intact lock… On the floor as the chains that were supporting it where melted to shit.

"Geez, didn't think we'd have to break in here." I mutter, as Uni blew the smoke off of her rifle… Thing. It was a rifle, but I don't really know anything outside of that as it looked like a frigging gun. Granted, it had a few more switches and levers than I would have liked, but Uni looked to be a skilled markswoman so she could make it work… Probably.

"Alright, let's make this quick and easy." Uni stayed back to reload her clip with bullets from… somewhere as I opened the door and took a peek inside.

Seems that this place had been abandoned for a while, as nature has begun to reclaim the aging machinery as it continued to rust over. Despite the fact that we broke in through the front door, holes were starting to appear in the eroding walls, as evidenced by the scavenging cat-like creatures wandering around, along with some Bits and… Tentacled Dogoos, goddammit.

"Well, time for some murder, right Uni?" I turn to the Candidate, who's nerves looked less like steel and more like thrice-reinforced titanium.

Click. "Let's do this."

Uni for her part, was already firing shots towards the crowd of Bits advancing towards us and she wasn't a bad shot, nailing one right in the rotor , disabling it, while hitting another one square in the chassis, slowing it greatly while it sparked violently.

I however… Was less of a crack shot. With a grand total of one Bit trying to attack me, I unloaded shot after shot at the bastard thing to no avail. Sighing in resignation, I put Peace away and simply aimed Tranquility at the bastard Bit before firing a single plasma infused shot at it.

To my surprise, I hit a shot after using my brain and aiming. It seems that despite the lower calibur of the bullet (this is a pistol versus a high powered rifle after all) the plasma rather funnily enough completely shreds through metal, leaving the Bit in a smouldering pile of wires and sparking technology.

Needless to say, Tranquility was not a fitting name for the carnage this hand cannon could cause to these Bits. "Uni! I'll take out the Bits! You focus on anything organic!... That isn't me." I quickly clarify before I could be hit with friendly fire.

"Switching to Napalm Shot." Uni without little issue swapped out her clip, almost on instinct. It was kind of scary, honestly.

Wait. "NAPALM?"

Uni turned to me, a confused look on her face. "Well, I wanted to put in some white phosphorus bullets, but Noire shot that down saying it was "A war crime" and would make "Lastation look bad", so I had to improvise with napalm."

I took a few steps back from Uni. Okay, she might look 13, but she has the mind of a war torn soldier who clearly wants to get things done in the most brutally efficient way possible.

And I thought Kei was scary. This is Kei with a gun. And napalm.

Still, Uni turned back to fill a nearby cat-like thing with molten lead. Regardless, she can hit her shots so well that her opponents dissipate into data before the effects of white phosphorus would kick in properly anyway, but still, what the hell Uni?

Right, back to destroying Bits. Getting the hang of having two hands on the handle paid off by giving me a proper aim. Popping a few shots off, I was able to nail some Bits, frying their circuits easily. Turning back to Uni, she had taken up a different position in the complex, one that gave her a better field of view to snipe innocent monsters. Still though, the Bits were taken care of, so I decided to sneak around a bit to see if I could loot something while I was here.

Noting that Tranquility was glowing awfully brightly, I swapped it out for Peace instead, which gave off a far less "explosive" glow as I explored the warehouse.

Rather surprisingly, I found some healing items. They seemed to be in date and went right into the inventory. I also grabbed some not completely busted looking bracelet-type armor, but it probably wasn't better than what I had. Still, I could sell it.

Looking around more, there were a few more broken things I could salvage for a quick buck at the market when we get out of here.

The only other thing that looked interesting was an obsidian gauntlet that had undertones of red between the joints of it and rubies decorating other parts of it, including one roughly thumb-sized one located right on the back of the hand.

The weirdest part of this wasn't the fact that there wasn't a matching left one, but the fact that it was nigh-intact despite being abandoned here. Still, could sell for some cash.

Hopping back over a downed crane, I saw Uni wandering for more things to shoot. Seems we were fresh out. "Seems we've cleared out the problem, then." I say to her.

Uni simply nodded, before suddenly grabbing me and dragging me down behind some barrels.

"Ow. Fu-" Uni slapped a gloved hand over my mouth to shush me. I was about to smack her when I saw what was strolling past us. A massive, steel covered, four legged spider-like tank with a dual-cannon attached to its top walked past us. It was easily over 2 meters tall and I doubt that even Peace and Tranquility would scratch it.

"That thing is why we're here." Uni whispered, pointing at the silver and purple mecha. "There's unsubstantiated rumors at the guild about this being a Planeptune creation due to it being spotted through the holes in the walls."

I suddenly miss the ability to jam a glorified cattle prod into things. "They seem very substantial to me when I'm staring at the ass-end of a turret on legs."

Uni for her part was taking this well. At least, she was loading something into her rifle. "I knew I should have brought the mortar rounds…"

As she reloaded, I took a peek out from behind cover. The machine seemed to be patrolling, as it began to wander down to the place where I found that bracelet and gauntlet earlier.

I looked at Uni for a moment. "Maybe we should go to where it was. I don't think we've been there yet." Really I just wanted to avoid conflict as much as possible in my current state.

Uni sighed, before getting up herself. "You have a point. Maybe we can find out why it's still patrolling after all this time."

So off we went towards the surprisingly sparse area the spider tank came from. It was covered in fresh burn marks, so I didn't really need to guess why the place was sparse.

Still, a large and open steel door greeted us. Bracing myself, I brought out Tranquility just in case as it glowed with the same intensity as Peace now, which was nice.

We walked in, only for… oh goddammit.

"You again?" I pointed both my guns to Anonydeath, who was working away on an abandoned, yet functioning computer.

Anonydeath for his part turned around and didn't seem to be bothered by the trio of guns pointing at him. "Ah, Koei. We haven't seen each other since that incident in Lowee! How's that head wound healing up?"

I put my hand against my head, trying to think of what happened since then. Drinking, more drinking, fought Rei, Anonydeath conceded against future attempts at villainy, helped world peace…

"Oh. RIght." I put away Peace and Tranquility before giving Uni a "Stand down, I got this." look and approached the flamboyant hacker. "Yeah, it's fine. Just so much has happened since then. Kinda forgot we weren't enemies anymore." I leaned on a part of the computer not covered in dials and what not.

"There we go. You remembered eventually." He slow clapped me. "Well, you're probably wondering what I'm doing here. It's nothing to do with that patrolling spider-tank, as much to my chagrin, the override codes have long since corrupted on this old, abandoned PC so I can't shut it down."

Shots rang out as Uni took down another Bit. "So… Why aren't you being shot to death?"

Anonydeath shrugged. "I presume because Time Splitter LTD ended up automating their entire factory a few years before shutting down entirely. So their security protocols are really just binary optical sensors that go berserk at anything with a pulse. Thankfully my magnificent suit manages to hide my perfect maiden body so I've been safe here so far."

Huh, interesting. "That really doesn't give a why though?"

"Oh, just a base of operations while I get my next plan going. I know what you're thinking, but this is for the good of Lastation, so put that animosity away, nosy-pants."

I sighed in resignation and put Tranquility away, which was pointing at his head not a moment ago. Maybe I am jumping the gun a tad.

"Well, go on then." I roll my eyes while keeping them on Uni, who didn't seem to be bothered as she was holding of another wave of Bits.

"Well, you've noticed the… less than clean air here, right? As it turns out, the Citizens Group was formed partially because of issues like this that the CPUs seemingly refuse to resolve or even acknowledge. Now to you and I, it's pretty obvious that they have bigger things on their plate and leave that to the Oracles. But as they're the face of the government, they get all the flak when the Oracles fail to do their job properly…"

Oh boy, politics. "So what you're saying is that if Lastation had cleaner air, it'd be better for Noire's reputation?"

Anonydeath nodded. "Indeed. And yes, I still love Lady Noire, but my darling Rei is also a viable target for my affections…" I swore I could see him blush near the neon slits that were his face. "R-right. She's just a friend. Regardless, one of Rei's (and thus the Citizen's Groups) big complaints was in fact the lack of response of the environmental deterioration of Lastation. Now tell me, who would benefit the most from making Lastation as efficient as possible, the consequences of the people living there be damned?"

I put a hand to my face as it all came together. "Goddammit, Kei." I removed my hand from my face. "So what, you're going to somehow get her ejected from her role?"

Anonydeath for his part seemed to take offense to that. "Nothing like that. Instead I'm compiling an official report that will convince her to start cleaning up Lastation by writing it in a way that appeals to her… efficient nature. Honestly, this is a lot more simple than elaborately planned hoax quests that fail."

I suppose it is. "Well, that explains a bit, thanks. Anything relevant to me?"

I could feel the smugness from here. "Well if you insist, there's rumors of some long lost treasure around here. Apparently the CEO of Time Splitter LTD bought a gauntlet in order to show off to his fellow CEOs, but nobody gave a damn and he just left it here one day before he went bankrupt. At least according to these logs. They're very fascinating once you comb through all the tax forms and get to the company emails. I have the whole thing on archive, basically."

Huh. That gauntlet… Nah, can't be. That'd be stupid.

"Well, it was fun talking to you Anonydeath. Glad to see you did change over a new leaf." I turn to leave, only for my blood to freeze. It was the damn tank. And Uni was nowhere to be found.

"ORGANIC LIFEFORM DETECTED. PLEASE PRESENT ID OR BE EXTERMINATED." The tank's "eye" scanned me up and down. Shit, shit, shit.

Wait… Could I? Quickly equipping the gauntlet, I used it to cover my face as I heard beeping sounds.

"AH, MR. DOOK. APOLOGIES FOR THE INCONVENIENCE. HAVE YOU LOST WEIGHT?" The robot's synthesized voice suddenly turned fenimine as it patrolled right past me, seeming content that I was this "Mr. Dook."

"Well, that's one way to fool an AI." Anonydeath mused. "That's definitely been patched out of future models of the Walking Auto-Cannon."

He turned to me, as if remembering something. "Oh! That model of the Walking Auto-Cannon was produced in Planeptune, back when they and Lastation weren't at war. That's why it has the purple and ivory design, but not any of the Planeptune markings. You can relay that to whoever started the rumor mill, because I am getting tired of kids almost getting fried by the pain of a tank."

Huh. That explains a bit, I guess. Shooting an armored thumbs up to Anonydeath, I ran off to find Uni. I hope she's okay…

Powerwalking out of Anonydeath's new base of operations, I looked around for the Lastation Candidate, while popping off a few Bits. As far as I could tell, the Bits were similar to the Auto-Cannon in that they only really searched for anything organic. They seemed to be coming at a rate that hinted at them still being manufactured, despite this place's disuse.

Of course I could just blame this on Anonydeath, but I think that's just unfair, especially as he seems to be trying to improve himself and they weren't much of a threat anyway.

Still, where the hell is Uni?

Vrrm, vrrm.

"Hello?" I simply my put my fleshy arm to my ear, fearing the interference from the still equipped gauntlet.

"WHERE THE HELL IS UNI?" Noire's voice screamed down the line, scaring the utter shit out of me. "AND DON'T EVEN TRY TO SAY YOU'RE IN PLANEPTUNE BECAUSE HISTOIRE WANTS WORDS WITH YOU TOO!"

Aw fuck. "Well, there's a funny story behind that. Ya see…"

"I SWEAR TO ME KOEI IF YOU DON'T BRING HER BACK TO THE BASILICOM WITHIN THE HOUR YOUR ASS IS GRASS, TREATY BE DAMNED."

Click

Well, time to find Uni I guess. Wandering around the complex, I realized that Uni could have easily ran off. This was bad for my ongoing wellbeing, needless to say.

"Uni? Uniiii? Come on, your sister wants you back at the Basilicom otherwise and I quote, "My ass is grass."" I call out at the deserted factory. Nada. Bugger.

Still, I had to persevere. Checking around cover and in parts I hadn't explored yet, Uni wasn't anywhere. This was not good.

"UNI, FOR FUCKS SAKE." I yelled, losing my patience. "YOUR SISTER HAS NEARLY KILLED ME ONCE BEFORE, I'M SURE AS HELL SHE WOULD DO IT AGAIN."

After the inevitable echo, I heard the grunting of a young woman. Yup, there she was. Running over as she did sound hurt, Uni looked fine, albeit she was clutching her leg…

Oh god. "UNI, PUT YOUR LEG DOWN!" I avert my eyes before I catch a glimpse of anything forbidden. I may have to start buying clothes for people with lesser chances of being peeped on.

After a moment, I turned my eyes to her again, she was blushing and looking away from me but seemed more hurt physically than emotionally, which I can thankfully fix without having to apply my poor social skills.

Pulling out a Nep Bull, I handed it to the blushing Candidate, who took it gladly. Taking a sip, she nearly spat it back out. "Gah! Who drinks this crap?"

"People who need healing." I state simply. "Now drink up, Noire found out that you snuck out of the Basilicom and just gave me shit over the phone."

Uni's face turned a lovely shade of white to contrast with her ebony hair. "Oh. Crap." She then proceeded to chug the Nep Bull without complaint, probably because she knew she'd need the energy.

As for me, I was tempted to grab my canteen, but I realized I might need that more once I got back to Planeptune so I put it back in my breast pocket before helping Uni get back up as we both decided to abscond this hellhole before Noire decided to find us herself.

Back out of the life-shortening industrial district, I put the cloth used to preserve my lungs back in my inventory. The gauntlet was also long since placed in there, mostly for visual reasons. Some random walking around with a cloth covering most of their face and a black gauntlet one was pretty conspicuous. Someone looking like a dishevelled businessman with the typical Lastation getup? Less so.

Then again, I have Uni with me and I don't know if people know of the CPU Candidates yet. Huh…

"Hey Uni, do people know that… You exist?" I asked curiously as we headed through an empty part of Lastation. Seemed that people were at work now, so the streets were practically empty.

Uni put a hand to her chin. "Not really. There's obviously the rumor mills, but Noire and Kei have been hush-hush on the subject. Apparently they're waiting for a perfect opportunity to arise… Whatever that means."

"If I had to guess, engineering a situation where all four Candidates are forced to reveal themselves to the world simultaneously." I pondered aloud. "That would give you all equal share and wouldn't really make one Candidates seem better than the others."

Uni shrugged. "Makes sense, let me guess, you'd do the same thing?"

I shrug back. "Mostly. I'd probably just come out and announce it, though."

The rest of the walk was uneventful, bar Uni's increasingly worried look as we slowly approached the Basilicom. I wanted to say something to comfort her, but decided against it. She'd be fine.

Still, we were here. The guard letting us in, Noire waited impatiently in the main lobby, looking very angry at me in particular.

I wanted to GTFO right then and there, but I figured she needed the gauntlet first. Hell if I'm holding on this. It looks evil. Best to keep it away from me.

Still, Noire marched up to me and with her slightly taller frame, she was even more intimidating when she had something to kick your ass over, apparently.

"Koei." She stated simply. "Why the utter hell did you not only wake up, steal Nepgear's guns and bugger off here without telling anyone where you were going, but drag my sister into your stupid escapade?"

Woah. This was a misunderstanding and a half and was escalating. Fast. "Okay first of all, Nepgear let me borrow Peace and Tranquility. I'll have to explain this when I get back to Planeptune too. Furthermore, I found Uni outside of a gun shop along with stating that she was on a quest and just joined me for fun. If anything, you should be thanking me, because I helped her out when she needed it… Speaking of." I turned to Uni. "What happened to you to be clutching your leg in pain like that?"

Pretty sure I saw Noire's eyes bug out from the corner of my eye as the Candidate started to sweat, "I-it was just a fall. I didn't get caught off-guard by a Bit and knocked down into an iron bar or anything." Uni lied through her teeth and I could taste her fear.

I decided to leave her be at that point. The rollocking she'd get from Noire would more than suffice for me in revenge for getting me yelled at. "Before I go Noire, I found this in the place we were questing." I pulled out the gauntlet and handed it to her. "Thought it'd look nice on you if nothing else."

Noire blushed. "T-thank you?" She inspected the gauntlet for a moment before looking back at me. Even with the slightly intimidating height difference, her blushing face was cute. "Don't think either you or Uni are off the hook for t-this, though!"

"You say that…"I started, before promptly turning around and sprinting in the other direction. "Sorry Uni!"

"DAMMIT KOEI!" Came the anguished yells of the Lastation CPU and Candidate as I got the seven hells out of there. I was already overdue for a lashing back in Lastation, so…

Phew. Full on sprinting to the subway station takes a lot out of you. I was almost glad to be back in the moist, dank air of the station as compared to Lastation's general air quality. Taking another Nep Bull out of my inventory, I decided to take this one easy as I waited for my subway. Probably wouldn't work out well if I just chugged the bastard thing, after all.

Vrrm, vrrrm, vrrm.

God… Dammit…

"Hello?" I swear if I get yelled at again I'm stomping these gloves out of existence.

"Koei? So you're alive?" Blanc's voice came from the other end. Surprising, because I swore this was Vert's number.

"Oh, hey. No I'm dead, this is just a prerecorded message. 'Sup?"

"Just checking that you're out of that coma. Rom was really worried after she heard the news is all." Blanc replied. Really, Rom of all people?

"Huh. Suppose she's that sort of person who worries about damn near anyone. Raise her well, won't you?" I ask in a worried tone. Poor Rom has a terrible compassionate role model in Blanc, but I'm not going to say that.

"Working on it." Blanc stated simply. "Vert was also worried. We all were. By the time we all woke up you were already back, so…"

"Oh. GOD." I state without thinking. All the CPUs surrounding my piss covered, blood soaked body is really disturbing for some reason. "Tell me nobody saw anything indecent?"

Silence. "No? I don't know why you'd ask such a thing. Compa was very insistent on making sure you were at least covered up before we could see you. Compa on the other hand…"

"Well, she's a nurse. It's in her job description, more or less. No point worrying over that." I play that off as cool as I could, at least. I really didn't mind Compa doing such things… God that sounds dirty.

"Alright then. I would pass the phone over to Vert, but she insists that her raid is more important, so I'll just put it down. Goodbye, Koei."

Click

Jeez, that was pretty passive aggressive of her. Still, glad to see some people were worried for me.

However unwarranted I felt it was. I'm just a guy, after all. Breathing a heavy sigh of relief at my sobriety and safety, I took one last chug of Nep Bull, leaving the can empty as I tossed it into a nearby trash can and headed towards the soon to depart subway car.

Histy's gonna be Pissty.

Ah, back in Planeptune. Fresher air, prettier sights, the impending doom of a Histoire lecture… Yup this was home.

At least it was still daylight out here. Man, today's been long. Oh well, time to head to the Basilicom. Still a lovely place to wander around in. Oh, better switch my suit to Histoire Purple. Maybe that'll help with negotiation.

It won't. Ahhh, time to crack that sobriety, I guess. Taking a long drink of whiskey, I entered the Basilicom and went up that tall, tall elevator.

As the door opened, she awaited me.

"Histoire." I simply stated. "I'm back."

Histoire's angry fairy face did not change. "Koei. We need to talk." No room for ifs ands or buts, simple facts were stated by the book fairy.

"Talk about what? The lovely weather?"

"Koei. You went out, without taking any precautions despite your condition. Do you realize how much danger you put yourself in today?"

"Plenty." Whiskey coursed through my veins. "What I do in my own time is none of your business, Histoire."

The fairy blinked. "But… You work for me."

Huh? "I never signed a formal contract to work for Planeptune. I was simply requested to bring peace to Gamindustri by uniting the four Nations. That job is done, no?"

"No." Histoire shook her head. "I may have been unclear during our initial meeting. Due to your status, current and former, I decided that once you did complete your quest to sort of draft you in as an official Planeptune citizen. The paperwork did take 3 days to process during your brief comatose state and I was ready to hand it to you this morning after you woke up. However, once I couldn't find you, I had asked IF where you went and she didn't know either. Neither did Nepgear, though she mentioned that you borrowed her prototype pistols for uh, testing purposes?"

"So you then decided to contact the other Oracles?" I prod.

"No, just Kei. Kei has information on everyone. It's kind of her thing if you didn't notice." Histoire replied.

"I did."

"Regardless, she had a beat on you as soon as you stepped into Lastation. She also had a beat on Uni as soon as she went on her Quest, so she was never in any real danger… She did tell me to thank you for keeping an eye on her in any case, as quote "it's not efficient to go around fixing things myself, you know." end quote."

"That woman is insane." I state simply. "Both insanely efficient and absolutely nuts at the same time. It's scary."

"That is an accurate summary." Histoire seemed to have calmed down at least somewhat. Still though, there was something she mentioned a minute ago that piqued my interest…

"Wait, I'm an official Planeptune citizen now?"

The book fairy nodded in response. "It would be weird if you continued to be in your previous state of illegality. Apologies if that seemed a little.. Pushy. I understand that you wish to be more independent, but paperwork is paperwork."

I shrugged in response. "I don't mind, but being clear about these things helps."

Histoire breathed a sigh of relief. "Good. You seem to be recovering fast, but for your sake… No, I must tell you the truth. Serenity was damaged."

What?

"When Plutia brought you back, Serenity had a large crack in its blade. It seems you pushed it too far along with yourself. I sent it off to repairs in Lowee 3 days ago after we made sure you were alright, but I haven't heard back from-"

"Hello, hello!" Neptune's voice came from behind us, shocking me slightly. Aside from her usual outfit replaced with a larger white parka, she was her usual happy self. In one of her hands was a vaguely familiar blade. "Here you go, Histy! One reforged, repaired and resharpened Serenity! Oh, hey Koppey!"

I put a hand to my face. "Please don't call me that. Only Plutia can call me that and that's because she's a fluffy ball of sadism and happiness."

Neptune rolled her eyes in a flamboyant matter. "Okay!~" She then proceeded to hand me "Serenity" for me to inspect. It was largely the same. Cool blue steel, the named etched into the hilt, that damn aura…

But it was different. For one thing, it did feel heavier. It might take some getting used to, but it's better than the alternative. The handle also had a sapphire inside the handle that seemed to glow when I gripped it. Now the fact that I couldn't see it was annoying, but it felt like I recovered some strength just by holding it. It seemed to have a better composition overall. Maybe it was it being reforged with more modern techniques, but it felt stronger overall too.

"Serenity." I state sweetly. "We're finally together again."

"You like that sword more than me, then?" IF peeped up from behind me.

Not even turning around I stated. "You know Serenity is only the second love in my life, Iffy." I then tossed my plush of me at her to make her adorably squee.

Because Iffy squeeing is the real win of today.

A/N: Some fun facts about this chapter!

Uni and Koei were meant to fight the Walking Auto Cannon, but I decided against it due to Koei's state.

Histy was going to be far more Pissty due to a misunderstanding, but I thought that made Koei come off as a smartass so I cut it for worrying about his safety.

Linda was going to appear! But for similar reasons to the auto cannon, decided against it.

This was an absolute bitch to write and I'm still sort of unhappy with it. Yeah… I think it's time to kick Koei into gear.

Oh and I was going to put in some Rabi-Ribi music (Brawl Breaks) but as the fight scene was so short, it wasn't worth it.