Chapter 2: Bombarded by Letters

The summer holidays had started when May was finally let out of the shed. She was sure that she had suffered a longer punishment before, but she couldn't recall if she had a longer punishment. She was sure that it could've had something to do with pranking Dudley. She wasn't sure which incident it was. It was either putting wet leaves in his bedroom a few minutes before the Dursleys woke up or it was the incident where she had tricked Dudley into eating a sponge with frosting on it.

She didn't know that Dudley would get sick from it, but then again, he could've pretended, but either way, she and Harry got punished for it, if Dudley was faking being ill. If he really was ill, then she would admit that she deserved getting punished. Her pranks weren't supposed to hurt someone or make them ill, she was doing that to get revenge.

She was sad that the holidays came because she usually got away from Dudley when they were at school, usually by hiding out at the library or in the girls' toilets. After all, she couldn't hide in the girls' toilets forever and she didn't want to be branded 'Toilet Girl' either.

Since Dudley's gang was around almost every day, Harry and May spent as much time away from Number 4. They usually went to the play park that was on Magnolia Road, a few blocks away, where they usually spent all day at, only leaving when evening was approaching. Dudley and his gang had broken almost all of the swings, except one.

While Harry swung on the swing, May usually read under a tree or planned out more pranks to pull on Dudley. Sometimes they talked about their possible friends that they would make at Stonewall High since Dudley and Piers were going to Smeltings, Uncle Vernon's old school, since Dudley wouldn't be there to scare them off. That is, if they didn't get their heads shoved in toilets on the first day of school.

One July evening, Aunt Petunia had bought Dudley his Smeltings uniform, which was orange knickerbockers, maroon tailcoats, and boaters. They also carried sticks that were used to hit each other when the teacher wasn't looking. It was supposed to be training for later life, although May wasn't sure how being hit with a stick was supposed to train someone for later life. Aunt Petunia had even taken the liberty of getting May some second-hand uniforms for when she and Harry went to Stonewall High.

Dudley was parading the living room in his Smeltings uniform, with Aunt Petunia was taking pictures and cooing, "Vernon, just look at him. I can't believe it. He'll be off to Smeltings."

"Caveat Smeltonia," said Uncle Vernon. "This is the proudest moment of my life." He looked proud, but to May, going to Smeltings wasn't anything to be proud of. If one thought that dressing up your kid as ridiculously as possible, was anything to be proud of.

"He looks like a bruised peach," May whispered to Harry.

Harry laughed and got nasty looks in response. Dudley seemed to investigate his Smeltings stick and swung it right at the Potter twins. The two ran off in separate directions to avoid getting hit by the stick.

It looked like Dudley had a new weapon to use against them.

It was the next day when May woke up to a horrible smell coming from the kitchen. May folded up her cot and put it against the wall of the stairs. She went in the kitchen to see Aunt Petunia stirring something in a large tub in the sink.

She stopped in the doorway staring at the sight before her, "Uh, Aunt Petunia…?"

"What's that?" asked Harry, coming up from behind May. They walked forward to see that there was grey water in the tub.

Aunt Petunia's lips thinned, the ways they always do whenever one of the twins asked a question. "Harry's school uniform."

"I didn't know that it was supposed to be wet," said Harry.

"Don't be stupid," said Aunt Petunia to Harry. "I'm dyeing yours and some of Dudley's clothes grey for you. It'll look like everyone else's when I'm finished."

"Doubt it," said May.

Aunt Petunia looked ready to say something, but Harry grabbed May's arm and dragged her to the kitchen table. Harry warned, "Don't push it."

"I'll look horrible in grey," May complained, thinking of her grey uniform that she'll have to wear.

Harry balked at her, "That's all you got from it? It'll look like I'm wearing elephant skin."

"It'll look like you're a giant pile of rags walking on its own," said May.

Harry chuckled right when Uncle Vernon and Dudley walked in. Uncle Vernon glared at May and ordered, "Brush your hair, girl!" He glared at Harry, "Comb your hair, boy!"

May heaved a sigh.

"Yes, Uncle Vernon," the twins replied in unison.

May looked at Harry and rolled her eyes.

They heard the click of the letter-box and the flop that the letters made when they hit the ground.

"Get the post, Dudley," said Uncle Vernon as he read his newspaper.

"Make one of them get it," ordered Dudley.

"Get the post, Harry," said Uncle Vernon without looking up from his newspaper.

"Make Dudley get it," countered Harry. The 'for once' didn't have to be vocalized.

"Poke him with your Smeltings stick, Dudley," said Uncle Vernon.

Harry dodged the swing as he went to get the post. May glared at Dudley, who ended up jabbing her in the ribs repeatedly with his Smeltings stick. She sighed and thought about how to prank Dudley.

She was considering hiding his Smeltings stick somewhere, but she figured that they would get in trouble for that, which actually wasn't anything new. She was taken out of her thoughts when a letter fell in front of her.

She picked the letter up, noticing that the envelope felt like it was made out of parchment. She looked at the address:

Miss M. Potter

The Living Room

4 Privet Drive
Little Whinging
Surrey

She wasn't sure what to do. Why did this person put 'The Living Room' on it? She turned it over and looked at the large purple wax seal, which had the letter 'H' on it. The wax seal was underneath a stamp of a coat-of-arms. The coat-of-arms bore an eagle, lion, serpent, and badger surrounding the letter H on it. Above the coat-of-arms it said "Hogwarts." She frowned at the strange name. The only letters that she ever received was from the library, where they were rudely demanded for books to be returned.

She returned to the kitchen and dropped Harry's letter in front of him and gave the rest of the post to her uncle. She popped the wax seal and took out a letter, which was made out of the same material as the envelope.

"Dad! Dad! They've got letters!" Dudley shouted.

"That's mine!" shouted Harry.

May went to unfold the letter rapidly, getting a paper-cut in the process when it was ripped out of her hands as well. "Give that back! It's mine! It specifically had my name on it! Not yours!"

Uncle Vernon glared at her. He hated it when she yelled, so May tried not to. May forced a smile and said in a false cheerful tone, "By all means, go ahead and read it."

"Who'd be writing to you two?" sneered Uncle Vernon and then he looked at the letters. The colour on his face rapidly went from red to green and then lastly, greyish white like old porridge. May thought it was extremely unhealthy and he should get that checked out. "P-P-Petunia!"

Dudley tried to get the letter but Uncle Vernon held the letter high out of their reach.

Aunt Petunia took one letter, looked at it, and looked like she might faint. She grabbed her throat and made a strange choking sound, "Vernon! Oh my goodness – Vernon!" She stared at Vernon, who stared back at her in horror.

May and Harry looked at each other, finding the reaction really strange.

Dudley gave a sharp tap to his father's head with his Smeltings stick, yelling, "I want to read those letters!"

"You can read?" asked May in disbelief.

Dudley swung the stick at her and May ducked, hitting her head on the table in the process.

"Don't swing that at her!" shouted Harry.

"And give us our letters!" shouted May lifting her head to glare at her relatives.

"We want to read them, because those are ours!" shouted Harry.

"Get out, you three!" ordered Uncle Vernon hoarsely. He started stuffing the letters in the envelopes.

Harry and May didn't move. May was too stunned by her relatives reacting like that over a letter that was addressed to her, a letter that she didn't even get to read.

"Give us our letters!" shouted Harry.

"Let me see them!" demanded Dudley.

"Since it has our names on it, they're ours, so therefore we should read them!" shouted May.

"Out!" roared Uncle Vernon. He grabbed Dudley and Harry by their collars and hauled them out of the kitchen, throwing them into the hallway and locking the door.

Aunt Petunia grabbed May's arm and hauled her off into the backyard. The kitchen door slammed shut and there was a click as the door was locked.

May waited a few seconds, before she stepped forward and pressed her ear to the door.

"Vernon," said Aunt Petunia in a quivering voice. "Look at the address – how could they possibly know where they sleep? You don't think they're watching the house?"

"Watching – spying – might be following us," said Uncle Vernon gruffly.

"But what should we do, Vernon?" asked Aunt Petunia. "Should we write back? Tell them we don't want—"

"No," interrupted Uncle Vernon. "No, we'll ignore it. If they don't get an answer…yes, that's best…we won't do anything…"

Aunt Petunia started, "But—"

"I didn't want one of them in the house, let alone two, Petunia! Didn't we swear that when we took them in, we'd stamp out that dangerous nonsense?" snapped Uncle Vernon.

There was silence and May hurried away from the door so they wouldn't know that she had been eavesdropping. She enjoyed being out of the shed.

She stood by the hedge and examined it when she heard the door open. She turned to Aunt Petunia, "Where's my letter?"

"Don't be stupid, that wasn't addressed to you," Aunt Petunia said.

That angered May, "It had our address and the living room on it. How can it be a mistake?"

"Don't ask questions, or you'll be locked in the shed 'til you're forty," threatened Aunt Petunia.

May walked in the house and went to the cupboard under the stairs. She walked in, closed the door, and sat on the cot next to Harry.

"I hate them," said Harry in a dark tone.

"Me too," said May.

"Those letters were ours and we didn't even get to read them," said Harry.

May was agitated, "Apparently we're not allowed to have mail!"

"Except you're allowed to get notes from the library," said Harry.

"That doesn't count as mail," said May. "I just wonder why they got mad over a school sending us letters."

"How do you know that it was a school?" asked Harry.

"The coat-of-arms seal," said May in a matter-of-fact tone. "Did you hear how they didn't want us to go? '…Tell them we don't want…' I just wonder why they don't want us to go."

"Why would they want us to stay? I thought they would be glad to get rid of us," said Harry.

"I honestly don't know, Harry," said May, "I honestly don't know." She reached in her pillowcase and took out her composition notebook and pencil. She opened the notebook.

"I should've put the letters in the cupboard," said Harry.

"You didn't know that they were going to act like that," May said. "I didn't know that they were going to get mad at us for daring to get mail."

"I just wonder what that letter was about," said Harry.

"Must've been terrifying, if they reacted like that," said May. "They probably saw the tuition price."

"Definitely," said Harry.

"Maybe it could've been a rich relative," said May, "Wanting us to live with them."

"That'd be a miracle," said Harry.

That evening, Uncle Vernon did something uncharacteristically of him. He visited Harry in his cupboard. Since May was always there, it was like a win-win situation for Uncle Vernon.

It made the already cramped space even worse, since it wasn't big enough for two ten-year-olds.

May hid the composition notebook and pencil in her pillowcase. She was sure that if her relatives discovered the notebook, she would have it taken away from her and they would read it. She didn't feel like dying at a young age. She still needed to act on her revenge plans.

When Uncle Vernon managed to squeeze himself into the cupboard, Harry asked, "Where's our letters? Who's writing to us?"

"Yeah, and what did they want from us?" demanded May.

"No one," replied Uncle Vernon in a falsely innocent tone. "They were addressed to you two by mistake."

"It's no mistake if it had the living room on it," May said darkly.

"And my cupboard," Harry added.

"And our first initials and our last name," added May.

"Silence!" roared Uncle Vernon.

The yell was so loud that it made spiders and dust ran down on the twins.

May felt one walk down her arm and she grabbed it, putting it against the wall so it can climb back up.

"Er – yes, you two," started Uncle Vernon. "About the cupboard and living room…your aunt and I have been thinking…" he spoke to Harry, "Harry, you're getting a bit too big for this cupboard…" he looked at May, "and you need more space than just the living room and the shed…" He looked at the both of them, "So, we think it would be nice if you two moved in Dudley's second bedroom."

"You're joking," said May. She looked at Harry, "I think Dudley hitting him with the Smeltings stick knocked something loose." She shook Harry's shoulders as she shouted, "I think Dudley broke him, just like how he breaks all of his toys!"

"Quiet!" shouted Uncle Vernon. "Take all your stuff and go upstairs! Now!"

Harry and May gathered their stuff, which wasn't much on Harry's end. However, on May's end she had three bin bags filled with clothes, among with a tattered sheet and pillow. She managed to carry the three bags up the stairs and up to Dudley's second bedroom.

Dudley's second bedroom was just basically storage to him. There were four rooms in Number Four. One room was for Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon, one room was the guest room, which usually boiled down to Aunt Marge visiting, and then Dudley's two bedrooms.

They both got to Dudley's second bedroom and opened the door. Nearly everything was broken in there. The month-old cine-camera was lying on a small, working tank that Dudley had driven over the neighbour's dog. Dudley's first ever television set with the screen broken because Dudley put his foot through it when his favourite programme had been cancelled.

May looked at the cage that once housed a parrot that Dudley ended up giving away just to get an air rifle, which end was bent because Dudley sat on it. The cage and rifle was on a shelf that was full of books. She didn't know why Dudley had books because he didn't read, and May was sure that Dudley didn't even know how to read. On the bright side, she finally had new reading material.

There was a wardrobe that had once belonged to Dudley, but somehow he had knocked the door loose and the door was now always ajar because the hinges were loose.

There was a white wooden framed bunk bed in the corner with what looked like a detachable ladder. The two looked at each other and they both made a mad dash for the bunk bed. May threw her bin liners on the bottom bunk and got on it as quickly as possible. "Ha! In your face Harry! I got the bottom bunk!"

"Isn't it usually the top bunk that people want?" asked Harry.

May was confused, "Is it? I don't recall hearing that. Oh, well." She laid down on the mattress and sighed in content. "This is bloody better than the cot."

"Definitely," said Harry.

"The only thing that's ruining it is the Hindenburg's wailing," said May. She covered her ears with her pillow, but it was no use. Dudley's wails was still loud enough for May to hear.

"I don't want them in there!" wailed Dudley. "I need that room! Make them get out!"

Whatever was said was enough for Dudley to stomp upstairs. May got up and ran for the bedroom and locked it, so Dudley didn't barge in and throw all their stuff out in the hall.

"I kind of wish I had that letter," said Harry.

May got back in bed, "Me too."

There was repeated thumping on the door, and Dudley screamed, "Get out! I need that room! Get out now!"

"How long will it take for them to reverse their decision, May?" asked Harry as Dudley screamed and hit the door some more.

"Ten minutes," said May. "After his screaming gives them headaches."

They heard Dudley stomp back downstairs while still screaming.

"They're not getting out! Get them to leave!" demanded Dudley.

In the morning, Dudley was in shock. He had thrown the biggest tantrum that May had ever seen, and his parents had refused to give him his room back. It stunned even May and Harry over that.

"I can't believe that they refused to give Dudley his room back," May whispered to Harry as she set a plate down in front of him.

"I know," whispered Harry.

"Is it backwards week?" asked May.

Harry shrugged.

May set her plate on the table when she heard the click of the letterbox and the flop of letters hitting the ground. She made a beeline for the kitchen door but she felt bony arms around her waist. She knew that Aunt Petunia had grabbed her.

Harry got up and ran for it, but Uncle Vernon grabbed his collar. Uncle Vernon looked at Dudley and said, "Dudley, go get the post."

Dudley sputtered and went into the kitchen, banging his Smeltings stick into stuff as he did so. May couldn't help but think that if she did that, she would get yelled at and locked in the shed for five months.

There was silence and then, Dudley yelled, "They got another one. Mr H. Potter, the Smallest Bedroom, Little Whinging, Surrey. Miss M. Potter…" He trailed off and Uncle Vernon gave a strangled cry. He threw Harry to the ground and ran into the hall.

"Those are ours!" May yelled and she elbowed her way out of her aunt's grasp. She ran to the hall where Uncle Vernon was holding up the two letters.

May got angry and she ran over, jumping on her uncle's back. She wrapped her legs around his waist and wound her arms around his neck. She tried climbing over him, somehow making it over his shoulder. "Give me those!" she hissed as she tried grabbing the letters.

Harry had appeared and grabbed Uncle Vernon's arm.

Dudley didn't seem to understand what was going on and started waving his Smeltings stick round. He smacked Harry in the ribs, hit Uncle Vernon in the stomach and when Uncle Vernon doubled over, May slid off of her uncle's shoulder. She fell on the ground and Dudley hit her in the back a few times.

"Don't you dare hurt her!" Harry shouted and ducked when Dudley swung at him.

May got up and grabbed a letter from her uncle's grip. She ran for the backyard, ignoring her uncle's call for her to get back there.

"Run, May!" encouraged Harry.

May ran through the kitchen, startling Aunt Petunia, and got to the kitchen door, before fumbling with the lock and getting it open. She ran to the gate that connected to the backyard and struggled to open it. She was stopped by two bony hands grabbing her upper arms. She screamed and Aunt Petunia grabbed the letter. May held tight to it.

"Let me have it!" shouted May. "It's mine!"

"You don't know that," snapped Aunt Petunia.

"Just let me have it, you old hag!" shouted May.

She realized that she really shouldn't have called her aunt that. She noticed how Aunt Petunia seemed to freeze and May certainly noticed her aunt slapping her. May was stunned at that. Aunt Petunia dragged her in the house and up the stairs. She threw open May's bedroom door and threw her in the room, slamming the door shut behind her. May stumbled to her bed and laid down on it. She buried her face in the pillow and cried.

May could remember the last time she cried. It was when she had to go to A&E to get stitches. She cried because it really hurt and Aunt Petunia had forced her to say that she and Harry were rough-housing, and she had made to knee him, but she misjudged, putting her knee through the glass pane. She didn't want to blame Harry for something he didn't do.

Oddly enough, Aunt Petunia had gotten her ice-cream after the trip to A&E, but she made May swear that she won't tell anyone.

She was sure that she was just frustrated. She didn't care about Aunt Petunia slapping her. She figured it was only a matter of time.

"May?" asked Harry tentatively.

"I just don't know why they won't give us our letters," said May in between sobs. "What could be so bad about that school that they don't want us to leave them?"

Harry sat down next to May and patted her shoulder. He said, "I have a plan." May looked up at him and tried to get her crying under control. Harry looked stunned. "What happened?"

"She stole my letter, what do you think?" asked May.

"I mean, what happened to your face?" asked Harry. "Your cheek is really red and puffy."

"She slapped me," said May.

"She did what?" asked Harry flatly.

"She slapped me," repeated May. "I called her an old hag. I kind of deserved it."

"No, you didn't," said Harry looking angry. "She deserved being called an old hag, because that's what she's being."

"What was your plan anyway?" May asked, wanting a distraction. She didn't want to think about the situation any longer.

"Since they know that we hadn't received our letters, there might be a chance that they will write back tomorrow," said Harry. "We sneak downstairs early in the morning and grab them before they could."

May nodded, "That could work. I don't think the Dursleys are that smart to think of something like that."

"Yeah," said Harry.

It was six in the morning when the alarm went off. Harry and May quickly got dressed, before quietly tiptoeing downstairs. They avoided the last creaky stairs and May noticed something funny looking on the ground.

She whispered, "Harry—"

It was too late because Harry stepped right on the mass and let out a scream of surprise as he jumped up. It was Uncle Vernon, sleeping right in front of the door in a sleeping bag. Apparently he had the same idea as Harry.

Uncle Vernon shouted at the twins for about half an hour, before ordering them to get him some tea.

They shuffled off to the kitchen and May got some bread, eating it as quickly as possible.

Harry put the kettle on the stove and May glared out the kitchen window at the shed. She hated the situation.

"I hate this situation," she said out loud.

"Oh, I thought you just loved having our letters get ripped away from you," Harry replied.

"I appreciate your sarcasm," said May with mock cheerfulness.

"I do my best, May," said Harry in the same tone.

After the kettle went off, Harry prepared the tea and took it to Uncle Vernon, only to watch six more letters drop right in their uncle's laps.

May started, "Give us—"

Uncle Vernon proceeded to rip the letters up right in front of them.

Uncle Vernon didn't go to work that day, staying home to mail the letterbox shut using fruitcake as a hammer.

However, nailing the letterbox shut didn't work out so well. May had decided that maybe Harry can distract the Dursleys, while May waited outside for the mailman so she can run upstairs with the letters when she got them. It didn't turn out well because Aunt Petunia had opened the front door and locked May into the shed. She was only let out when it was Sunday, because there would be no post on Sunday. She grabbed a tray with a kettle, a teacup on it, and some small bowls with sugar cubes in it. Harry was to serve biscuits.

They went into the living room and May set the tray down on the coffee table and looked at her uncle who was grinning maniacally. May didn't think that getting letters would make her uncle go mad like that. Harry gave Dudley and Aunt Petunia a biscuit before going over to Uncle Vernon.

"Fine day, Sunday. In my opinion, the best day of the week," said Uncle Vernon grinning. He looked at Dudley, "Why is that, Dudley?"

May and Harry looked at each other.

Dudley shrugged and didn't answer.

"There's no post on Sundays," May answered. "Right, Uncle?"

"That's right, Mayflower," said Uncle Vernon very cheerfully. "No, damn letters. No, sir. Not one single bloody letter, not one."

May glared at her uncle for using her full name. No one ever used her full name. The only ones that did was her enemies (I.E. Piers and her relatives), her teachers before they used her nickname, May, and her classmates who used it to mock her.

Harry walked over and nudged May. He motioned to the window with his head and May went over to look out the window. Her mouth dropped open at the sight of the owls around Number Four.

"What the bloody hell?" whispered May in disbelief. She wasn't sure what was more shocking: Uncle Vernon calling her Mayflower instead of girl or the sight of the owls hanging round. "It's an Owl Battalion."

Harry snorted.

Uncle Vernon continued talking, "Not one blasted—"

There was a strange sound and the twins turned round to see what had cut their uncle off. They looked at each other and May arched an eyebrow at that bout of strangeness.

Harry shrugged and then the rumbling started to come from the fireplace. They stared at the fireplace as it seemed to start shaking. May grabbed Harry's arm in terror.

Loads of letters came shooting out of the fireplace. May ducked and covered her head with her arms hiding behind the closest chair. Her relatives, minus Harry, shrieked in terror.

"Make it stop! Please make it stop!" shouted Dudley. It was probably the only time that he ever said 'please.'

"Go away!" shouted Uncle Vernon. "Go away!"

"What is it?" shouted Dudley. "Please tell me what's happening!"

May shouted, "it's the Letterpocalypse! I'm too young to die!"

She peered over to watch Harry jumping up onto the coffee table trying to get a letter from the air. She looked down and crawled over, grabbing a letter. She got up, getting hit with the letters and she ran into the hallway in victory. She went for the cupboard and tried to open it, and went for the stairs. She tried to run upstairs but screamed when Aunt Petunia grabbed her by her hair. "Let me go! They're mine and Harry's, not yours!"

"Stop it, girl!" Aunt Petunia shouted over the scream and ripped the letter out of May's hand. She released May and ripped the letter up. Harry came running out of the living room and Aunt Petunia grabbed the letter from him and Uncle Vernon charged out of the living room, grabbing Harry round the waist. Aunt Petunia kept a hold on May's arm.

Dudley ran out and ran for his mother.

"That's it!" shouted Uncle Vernon. He was struggling to have a hold on a struggling Harry. The board on the letterbox broke and letters came shooting out.

"They're for me and May! Let go of me!" shouted Harry.

"We're going away!" shouted Uncle Vernon. "Far away where they can't find us!"

"Daddy's gone mad, hasn't he?" cried Dudley.

"I want you all back here in five minutes! Pack your bags! Just clothes! No arguments!" ordered Uncle Vernon.

May wondered if her uncle had really lost his mind.