Author's note:

After a short break, here we are with the second part of this story, which begins two weeks after the end of the first one. A special mention goes to Guest for giving me the inspiration to write Steinarius' dream, and to Elspeth for her usual support and her important opinions.

There's a warning for language and angst. Also, this is the longest chapter I've ever written - after all, it takes a lot of words to explore Steinarius' complicated mind.

Enjoy!

26th of Rain's Hand, 4E 202

The wild forest around Falkreath was as beautiful and fascinating as ever. Masser and Secunda were shining in the clear summer sky, thus casting their dim light on a little clearing by a pond. On its shores, two lovers were walking hand in hand.

As he embraced Agda, Steinarius couldn't stifle a laughter. The Imperial kissed her, caressed her, nibbled at her skin until the girl was a writhing mass he held tight in his arms. A minute later, when Agda pulled away and made to shed her dress, Steinarius felt the usual rush of lust and love and tenderness that always accompanied that gesture. Before the girl's clothes could fall to the floor, however, the magic of that clear summer night was broken by a scream.

Steinarius was taken aback by the terrified yell Agda produced shortly after. The girl had turned pale and was shivering as though she'd just seen a ghost. When the Dragonborn looked over his shoulder, he immediately realized the reason for Agda's distress - not far from him, a scary figure was observing them from the shadows.

The creepy stranger was a woman wearing a charred armor adorned by a little wolf-like symbol. She had a lean figure and was and was so skinny that her limbs resembled pale bones with nothing but a few inches of skin attached. As the intruder took a step forward, Steinarius also realized that she had dark brown hair full of knots and dirt.

Before the Imperial could overcome his surprise, Agda fell to the ground with a sharp cry of pain. Worried and confused, Steinarius made to crouch beside her, but was taken aback by the unexpected speed of the mysterious woman who had startled Agda in the first place. Baring her teeth, the stranger leaped over the Imperial and started wrestling with him on the dewy grass of the clearing.

As he fought for dear life, Steinarius realized that his opponent was completely covered in scars. There was a huge gash on her neck, another one on her cheek, a last one across her right eye. Her left iris, the only one the Imperial could see at the moment, was as black as a starless night. That detail allowed Steinarius to trace the identity of the woman: eyes widened in fear and rage and disbelief, the Dragonborn whispered the name of his former fiancée.

Vigdis seemed to go crazy as she heard her name coming from the lips she'd once been used to kissing. She yelled in desperation, then she unexpectedly abandoned the fight, thus allowing Steinarius to get back on his knees.

Although his heart was screaming for him to help Agda, the Imperial realized that Vigdis was about to attack him again. With a frown, he also noticed that the body of his former fiancée was violently shaking.

"If I can't have you, she won't have you either!", Vigdis groaned before bursting into a hysterical laughter. A second later, the former Companion shifted into a werewolf.

Steinarius was shocked by the unexpected appearance of the majestic beast he'd learned to trust over the years. Vigdis' pelt was as black as coal, whereas her eyes immediately became silver. As she charged towards the Imperial, Steinarius was quick to change and face the huge creature that was threatening his life and his happiness.

The fight was long, as both werewolves were determined to seize the victory for themselves. As he snarled at his enemy, Steinarius couldn't stop thinking about Agda, who was still lying unconscious behind him. If Vigdis had harmed her, his revenge was going to be terrible.

The clearing in the forest was soon filled with growls and howls and sharp whines of pain. The werewolves lunged at each other's throat, used their claws to cut through pelt and skin and muscle, bared their teeth to spill the blood of their former mate. After many endless minutes, Steinarius miraculously managed to strike the winning blow.

As the grey wolf snapped her spine in two, Vigdis let out a heart-breaking howl. Before she faced death, however, the woman made one last effort to return to her human form.

"If I can't have you, she won't have you either", she repeated. This time her voice was nothing but a whisper.

Steinarius didn't bother listening to those evil words. He would have liked to thrust his sword in the chest of the woman who had ruined his life, but the worry for Agda got the upper hand. As the Imperial reached for her, he immediately cradled her face in his hands and looked for her pulse point.

When Steinarius realized that Agda was no longer alive, he felt as though his heart had just burst into flames.

It took Steinarius a few moments to recover from his nightmare. In an attempt to calm his frantic heartbeat, the Imperial sat up on his bed and took his head between his hands. There was a movement on the left, then Erik spoke. The boy's voice was hoarse and sleepy.

"Is everything alright?"

Steinarius was too shocked to reply. Faendal and Erik exchanged a worried glance, then stood up from their beds. As Steinarius took in their puffy eyes and their tired faces, he felt embarrassed for the way he'd just startled them awake for the third time in the same night.

"I-I'm fine", the Dragonborn muttered. "I just had another bad dream. T-there's nothing to worry about".

The other members of the Blades didn't believe him. In a weak attempt to soothe the distressed Imperial, Faendal laid a hand on his forearm and cast a weak calming spell, whereas Erik provided him with some water.

"I can fetch Delphine, if you want", the red-haired warrior said. "She'll give you a sleeping draught, if you ask nicely".

Steinarius shook his head. The last thing he needed at the moment was for Delphine to fuss about his mental health.

"I just need some fresh air", the Imperial said as he stood up and covered his bare torso with a blanket. "Don't worry for me: I'm perfectly fine".

Although Faendal and Erik didn't believe him, they nonetheless allowed Steinarius to leave the sleeping quarter of Sky Haven Temple. As he abandoned the suffocating warmth of the room, the Dragonborn immediately felt better.

Without bothering to put on his boots, Steinarius walked towards the backyard of the headquarters of the Blades. Delphine had done a great job with that place: thanks to her, the old Temple was now full of every kind of comforts.

As his feet came in contact with the cold floor of the main hall, Steinarius shivered and let out a brief brrr noise. That sound was enough to draw Delphine's attention.

"Where are you going?"

As the Breton stood up from her chair and approached him, Steinarius fought the urge to roll his eyes. It looked as though Delphine never felt the urge to sleep.

"I just need some fresh air", the Dragonborn lied. "It's too hot in the sleeping quarter. Moreover, Esbern is snoring as loud as a cave bear".

Delphine gave him a skeptical look, but Steinarius ignored her and resumed walking. As he finally reached the back doors of the Temple, he pushed them open and inhaled the cold air of the Reach. After sitting on a nearby rock, the man let his blanket fall to the ground and rested his back against a tree.

With some luck, the freezing breeze coming from the hills would help him stay awake for the rest of the night.

Yawning loudly, Steinarius tried once again to put on the cuirass of his armor. The Imperial had spent most of the night awake, shivering and sighing and strolling around the little backyard of Sky Haven Temple in order to prevent himself from falling asleep and having another nightmare. Now that dawn had finally broken in, the Dovahkiin was ready to face the long journey back to Riverwood. First, however, he needed to find a way to keep the pieces of his armor in place.

"You're leaving".

As Delphine spoke, Steinarius didn't even turn to look at her. The Breton was standing in the doorway of the armory and looked even grumpier than usual.

"I'm talking to you, Dragonborn. I'd appreciate it if you showed some attention".

Steinarius sighed. He was sleepy and it was raining and although it was shortly past dawn he was already being pestered by the most annoying woman he knew. Moreover, the stupid straps on his Blade armor were unwilling to cooperate and keep his cuirass in place. Right then it looked as though everything was screaming at him to go back to bed and remain there for the rest of the day.

"Dragonborn, I'm…"

"I'm listening, for Talos' sake, I'm listening!", Steinarius snapped when his cuirass fell to the floor for what felt like the hundredth time. "And I would have left a lifetime ago if your stupid predecessors hadn't required their warriors to attend a special course in order to learn how to strap their armors on! Also, my name is Steinarius, for Dibella's nonexisting beard, not Dragonborn! It's a beautiful Imperial name and I'd be very glad if you…"

Delphine didn't show any reaction at the outraged cries coming from the man who was helping her rebuild her Order. On the contrary, she resumed speaking before Steinarius had even stopped screaming.

"Erik has told me about your nightmares".

Those words caused Steinarius to stop yelling and finally listen to Delphine. The Imperial was completely shocked: right when he was thinking that his day couldn't get any worse, there came Erik with his babbling mouth.

"The boy should mind his own business", Steinarius hissed after overcoming his surprise. "And so should you".

"I'm just trying to help".

Confronted with those words, the Imperial chuckled.

"Delphine, you never do anything for free. If you're willing to help me, it means that you want something in return".

The Breton didn't deny the truth in Steinarius' words.

"I want to help you just because your nightmares are distracting you from your fate", she simply said. "And if you are distracted from your fate, all of us are doomed".

Steinarius let out a snort. By now he had stopped wrestling with his cuirass and was simply leaning against the wall of the armory.

"If Erik hadn't talked to you, you wouldn't have found out about my nightmares at all", he pointed out. "Therefore, I can't see why you say that they are distracting me from my curse - or however you called the fact that I'm supposed to save the world from the dragons".

Delphine wasn't in the right mood to argue with Steinarius, therefore she ignored most of his comments.

"Judging from what Faendal has said, those nightmares always follow the same pattern", she replied. "You keep on shouting something about Agda and another woman, then you wake up on the verge of tears".

Steinarius felt betrayed by the way Faendal had revealed that to Delphine – sadly enough, it looked as though Erik wasn't the only one who had problems keeping his tongue in check.

Before the Imperial could overcome his susprise, however, Delphine talked again.

"As you can imagine, Faendal has also told me about the latest developments in your love life. In a normal situation I would wish you all the best for your life with Agda; unfortunately, Dragonborn, yours isn't a normal situation. You're supposed to be saving the world, not smooching with an innkeeper. Agda is distracting you and that is putting everyone's life at risk. Also, the girl may have a pretty figure, but she isn't worth so many attentions. If I'm to be honest, I think that you can do much better than that, Steinarius".

For the hundredth time over the previous few minutes, Steinarius felt the need to grab his shield and smash it against Delphine's arrogant mouth. He hated the woman, he really did – but most of all, at that moment the Imperial hated the little part of himself that fully agreed with her evil words about Agda.

The roads of the Reach were full of dangers, that much Steinarius knew. Yet, as he and his horse slowly walked west, the Imperial couldn't bring himself to focus on his surroundings.

Part of that was obviously due to his lack of sleep. Also, the Imperial still had to get used to Pansy's irregular pace. His faithful black steed had been killed during the attack on Helgen, and ever since then Steinarius had travelled through Skyrim on foot. After reaching Markarth a few days earlier, however, the Dragonborn had decided to purchase another mount.

Pansy was as sturdy and reliable as all the other horses of Skyrim. She was very young and had an unusual spotted coat that Steinarius actually didn't like. Yet, with some luck, Agda would fall in love with it and finally ask his man to teach her how to ride.

Given her lack of confidence with horses, Agda never travelled far from Riverwood. As a consequence, Steinarius was forced to visit her very often in order to spend time with her. Unfortunately, the Imperial had taken to loathing his forced trips to Riverwood: every time he spent a few days in the village, he felt as though he was wasting precious time in the fight against the dragons.

With a sigh, Steinarius forced Pansy to increase her speed. As the horse settled into a comfortable trot, the Imperial compared his love for riding to the way Agda tensed every time she was near a horse. A moment later, the Dragonborn forced himself to meditate on his nightmares.

Those unpleasant dreams had begun after the first time he slept with Agda, that much was certain. At the beginning Steinarius had believed it to be a coincidence, but after a few days he had been forced to change his mind.

When that vampire attacked you, you probably contracted Sanguinare Vampiris, Agda had reassuringly told him after he'd woken her up for the hundredth time in the same night. Since you're a werewolf, the disease didn't take root. Nonetheless, it is causing you to suffer from these weird nightmares. Things will get better over time, Stein. You just need to be patient.

Esbern thought Agda to be completely right, and the Dragonborn had been weirdly reassured by the old man's opinion. Unfortunately, that morning Steinarius couldn't get Delphine's words out of her mind. Thanks to them, the Imperial had namely made a tragic realization: all his nightmares showed him how void his life would be if Agda suddenly died or decided to leave him.

Steinarius knew that his worries were completely irrational, as there was no reason why Agda should risk her life or dump him or attempt on his mental health in any other way; yet, after all he had suffered because of Vigdis, the Imperial seemed unable to trust another woman.

Sadly enough, that morning there were also other things that deeply worried Steinarius. As much as he hated it, the man had to admit that Delphine was right: rebuilding the Blades was a noble task, sure, but one day he would be forced to face Alduin for good - and he clearly couldn't do that while being distracted by his love life.

Everything would be different if Agda were a warrior, the Imperial thought with a snort. If the girl knew how to fight, the Dragonborn would have already asked her to join him on his adventures, thus making everything easier for the two of them. Yet, after risking his life to save Agda's less than two months before, Steinarius knew that the young innkeeper was still too unexperienced to tackle the wilds.

As he meditated on Delphine's words, the Dragonborn smelled a foul scent coming from ahead. As he realized that he was nearing a fight, Steinarius rolled his eyes.

At that moment he deeply regretted his choice of riding towards Riverwood rather than taking a carriage.

Steinarius hated the Reach with a passion – he hated its steep hills and its wild rivers, he hated its racist inhabitants and their stone beds, he hated its Jarl and the fact that all the foulest creatures of Skyrim (Falmer and Thalmor and Hargravens and a few more) seemed to dwell in that Hold. But most of all, Steinarius hated the Reach because of the Forsworn. As a consequence, when he saw three Reachmen attacking a Nord who wasn't even wearing an armor, the Imperial hopped off his horse and immediately joined the battle.

The Forsworn were taken aback by Steinarius' arrival. The sword of the man swiftly cut its way through the chest of one of them, then it proceeded to sever the head of the closest enemy. When the last savage turned to face him, however, Steinarius was both shocked and surprised - in all his life, he had never seen a Briarheart roaming so close to the roads of the Reach.

That moment of distraction was enough for the powerful enemy to lunge at the Imperial. Slightly unsettled by the speed with which the Reachman was wielding his weapons, Steinarius reacted in the traditional draconic way: without any effort, he shouted the Briarheart off his feet.

As the force of his Thu'um echoed through the hills, Steinarius cursed – due to his lack of attention, the Nord man he was trying to help had just been fus-ro-dahded away by his shout. Nonetheless, the Dragonborn had no time to worry: taking advantage of the temporary weakness of his last opponent, he leaped towards him and thrust his sword through his chest.

As the light faded from the eyes of the Briarheart, Steinarius heard someone cry. When he looked around, he noticed a distraught woman hidden behind a juniper bush. Before the Imperial could overcome his surprise, the damsel in distress abandoned her shelter and buried her face in his armor.

"Looks like we've found a true hero".

As he turned his head, Steinarius saw the Nord man he'd helped fighting the Forsworn. The stranger was holding his ribcage and was accompanied by Pansy, who had observed the fight from safe distance. When she noticed that thin man, the lady in Steinarius' arms immediately left the Imperial and went to hug the Nord, causing him to let out a pained whimper.

After offering the man a health potion, Steinarius frowned.

"Have I hurt you?"

As he gulped the healing vial under his wife's careful gaze, the Nord shook his head.

"Quite on the contrary, I'd say that you saved me and my woman from certain death", he smiled. "The name's Enno, by the way".

Steinarius shook hands with the Nord and with his wife Tebla. The woman looked at him with a mixture of terror and respect, then whispered something into Enno's ear. The man suddenly looked unease. Under Steinarius' confused gaze, the man explained why he was so nervous.

"My wife suggested that you could help us with a problem", he said with a noticeably embarrassed tone. "You're quite good at fighting and, if Tebla is right, you are the person the Greybeards call Dovahkiin".

Wonderful, Steinarius thought with a snort. Now that these two have recognized me, they'll ask me to retrieve some long-lost family amulet or free their house from the skeevers.

The Imperial was in no mood for such efforts: he wanted to reach Riverwood before nightfall and was already late with his schedule. Moreover, it was raining - and Steinarius hated rain.

Enno probably noticed the unenthusiastic look on the Imperial' face and immediately tried to apologize for asking him for help.

"If you aren't…"

"You're right, I'm the Dragonborn", Steinarius interrupted him. After all, there was no use in denying his identity after shouting a Briarheart off his feet less than ten minutes earlier. "What do you need?"

To Steinarius' shock, Enno and Sigurd revealed him that their campsite had been destroyed by a dragon.

"You two set up camp in the Reach?!", the Dragonborn asked in disbelief.

Steinarius was too sleepy to try and be tactful; moreover, he couldn't understand why two people in civilian clothes would choose to spend the night in a little tent in the middle of the most dangerous Hold of Skyrim.

"We're from Dragonsbridge", Enno explained. "We would like to land a job as miners in Markarth, that's why we're facing this journey".

Steinarius had the feeling that Enno wasn't telling him the truth - either that, or he and his wife were completely crazy. Nonetheless, the Imperial decided to stop enquiring about their personal life and simply asked them where they'd last seen the dragon. A moment later, Steinarius gave them some money and two of his daggers, then he hopped on his saddle and headed for Dragontooth Crater.

If there was a dragon roaming that close to Karthwasten, someone needed to intervene.

As he trotted towards his goal, Steinarius sighed. Enno and his wife had described the beast that had attacked them as a majestic white demon made of ice and death – and if that meant anything, Steinarius was probably in for a tough fight against an Ice Dragon. As soon as he reached his destination, the man realized that his prediction had been correct; also, he realized that the Forsworn settlement near Dragontooth Crater was completely empty. The Reachmen were mad, but not mad enough to dwell in a fort so close to a dragon. The Briarheart Steinarius had met earlier probably came from that place.

The fight against the dragon was long and tiring. Luckily enough, a crumbling tower near the lair of the creature provided Steinarius with shelter and with a chance to rest every once in a while. Nonetheless, the Imperial soon started feeling extremely tired. His runs back and forth from the tower were wearing him out, whereas his arms were hurting because of the many times he had to use his bow. As his arrows missed the dragon for the hundredth time, Steinarius wished he could discover a Shout that would trap those foul beasts to the ground.

After many curses, the Imperial eventually managed to force his enemy to land. At that point Steinarius was quick to reach for the dragon, hop on his neck and thrust his sword through the thick skull of the creature.

When the dragon moved for the last time, Steinarius was thrown to the ground. Once there, the warrior closed his eyes and panted heavily under the falling rain. With a grimace, he thought that he was getting too old for the dragonslaying business.

When the soul of the dragon penetrated through his body and mind and soul, Steinarius fought the urge to scream: he hated the blackness that always overcame him at that moment, he hated the rush of foreign memories that flooded his brain with images of fights and fire and flying, he hated the pulsing of the Dragon tongue in his ears. As a consequence, when he underwent that process, the Dovahkin always felt on the brink of losing his mind.

Shaking, Steinarius soon forced himself on his knees. Absorbing a dragon soul always managed to heal his injuries, but it also left him feeling stressed and distraught.

As he slowly got up, Steinarius realized that the Word Wall near the dragon skeleton was attracting him with its sacred ancient mistery. At the same time, he noticed that the straps on his gauntlets had definitely caved in after his tumble. Thinking about all the efforts he'd made to put on his Blade armor that morning, the man couldn't help but let out the thousandth curse of the day.

After learning the word of a new Shout, Steinarius went to retrieve Pansy. The horse was looking at him from a safe distance and hadn't shown any interest for the battle between his owner and the dragon. That indifferent attitude was probably going to grant her a long and merry life.

Before hopping on the saddle, Steinarius realized that the straps on his cuirass were about to cave in, whereas the ones on his gauntlets had already broken. With a sigh, the man wondered about the chances to find a blacksmith so far from Markarth. He thought and he thought and he thought until the answer popped up in his mind: he could find a blacksmith in the Imperial Camp not far from that place.

Steinarius was very tired as Pansy carried him towards the little settlement. It was shortly before midday, but the man was already hungry and sleepy and exhausted. Also, he feared he would never make it to Riverwood before nightfall.

As he got closer to the Imperial settlement where he'd served less than a year earlier, Steinarius frowned: most of the tents had seemingly collapsed and no one had taken care of pitching them again. Also, there were no soldiers patrolling the area.

Before he could decide whether to write a letter to Tullius about that or not, the Dragonborn realized that those problems hadn't been caused by neglicence - quite on the contrary, the soldiers of the camp had been involved in a heated battle.

As Steinarius walked through the remains of the settlement, he felt his heart sink low in his chest. Despite the rain, the blood of the soldiers still stained the white linen of the tents, whereas the smell of decay filled the air. Piled in a corner, Steinarius eventually found the corpses of his former brother-in-arms. Most of them had been charred, so that it was impossible to recognize them.

Sickened by the sight of that slaughter, Steinarius had to sit on the ground for a few seconds. There was no way to understand who had raided the settlement, but the Imperial's money were on Ulfric and his men.

After regaining his cold blood, Steinarius started taking care of his fallen comrades. Despite the rain and the tiredness and his date with Agda later in the evening, the Imperial spent the whole afternoon at the camp, burying the dead soldiers and murmuring a few prayers to the Divines. As he thought about the death of his former brother-in-arms, Steinarius suddenly remembered what Delphine had told him that very same morning.

Dragonborn, yours isn't a normal situation, the Breton had said. You're supposed to be saving the world, not smooching with an innkeeper. Agda is distracting you and that is putting everyone's life at risk.

With a heavy sigh, Steinarius realized that Delphine was painfully right. Part of him had always been aware that his relationship with Agda was distracting him from his duty; the other part, however, had used the girl's love to forget about his destiny as the Dragonborn. Now that he was confronted with the consequences of his negligence, however, Steinarius couldn't help but mutter a string of nasty insults towards himself. Skyrim was at war, the dragons were roaming near the villages, Alduin was getting stronger and stronger – and rather than solving those problems, he had fallen in love with a pretty innkeeper who could nothing but cook and cast a few spells.

While rubbing his tired eyes, Steinarius realized that he had to do something about his relationship with Agda. If he wanted to save the world, he had to to fully focus on his calling as the Dragonborn - and in order to fully focus on his calling as the Dragonborn, he had to forget about his love life and resume the lonely life he'd got used to over the previous three years. And in order to do that, Steinarius needed to break the heart of the sweetest girl he'd ever known.