A/N:
My dear readers, here I am with a new update. It's time of important meetings for Agda - also, it's time for her to remove a few pebbles from her boots. First, however, let me thank all my amazing supporters for their lovely reviews: the answer to chapter 57 was amazing and gave me a much-needed moral boost!
As for MeanE's comments, "son of a biscuit" has just become my favouritest insult ever. Also, glad you're still enjoying this story!
A big "thank you" goes to KSausage for their remark on the word "Apropos". As I said before, this kind of remarks are very important to me, so keep them coming! Also, I thank you for your comments about Ulfric's personality. I did have a tough time with nailing his character, so it was good to read some constructive criticism about that.
On a side note, I'm happy to see that I'm not the only GoT fan around here - Elspeth, Valtieri and KSausage, kudos to you for noticing the reference to ASOIAF! Also, I thank Elspeth for her kind comments!
Speaking of thanks, I am very grateful to kaibaeskyrim for her wonderful words about chapter 57. The best instalment of the book, I'm flattered! And here I was thinking my quality standards were getting lower...
As for Scepta101's comments, they had me laughing out loud in a room full of people. I love your enthusiasm and I could actually relate to it!
As for Valtieri, you gave us material for two very interesting discussions. First, Ulfric's behavior: I don't think he really did try to deceit Agda - actually, I think he was just curious to see how that young mage would react to his attentions. Stealing a lover from a Captain ofthe Legion isn't that bad, especially when said lover is the Archmage of Winterhold... Jokes apart, however, before posting I was actually afraid Ulfric was a bit out of character in that chapter and for a moment I even thought of deleting that instalment altogether. You and KSausage partially confirmed that my doubts were founded, but hopefully I'll make things a bit clearer in this chapter, when Agda reflects about her encounter with Stormcloak.
As for the second discussion, the one about rebels and young people, I think it's a mixture of the factors you mentioned. Young people tend to see the world in black and white and to have a lot of dreams, irrealistic as they may be; also, they (we) firmly believe in the whole "impossible is nothig" thing. Older people instead tend to be more detached and disillusioned. I guess that's why we usually consider rebels as very young people: it is easier for a teenager to feel (and act) rebellious than it is for the older generation, though Ulfric is there to prove that there are always exceptions to that general rule.
Last but not least, a huge thank you goes to Maddyodair for her lovely comments and her amazing support. Oh, and I love your profile pic!
Back to the current instalment, I consider it rather important because it introduces the third arch of the story.
Enjoy and let me know what you think!
1st of Second Seed, 4E 203
Right after her misadventure with Ulfric, a very worried Agda hastily headed for Winterhold. For a long amount of time the girl feared for the leader of the rebels to lay siege to her town or to demand her execution to the local Jarl; yet, as the hours became days and the days became weeks, not even a member of the Stormcloaks turned up in Winterhold to claim Agda's life.
The young Archmage was actually confused by that lack of consideration. She'd expected Ulfric to be mad at her, to be outraged by her refusal, to call her "an Imperial whore" in front of the whole country; yet, the Jarl of Windhelm was behaving in a surprisingly dignified manner.
Agda's quick comeback from Windhelm was greeted with curiosity by her colleagues; yet, the young mage didn't tell anyone about the details of her meeting with Ulfric. Not only was she still too embarrassed to talk about it: she was also having troubles finding an explanation for her own behavior. Ulfric hadn't poured any special potion in her drinks - pathetic as it may sound, Agda had convinced herself of the contrary because she needed to feel less disgusted by her actions.
Being born in Anvil, the young mage was used to endless courtings characterized by gallantry and patience; the harsh life of Skyrim, however, left no time for those petty love games: when a Nord woman felt attracted to a Nord man, she usually ended up in his bed before she could even realize it. Ulfric was accustomed to that and had always considered actions to be much more valuable than words - that's why, believing that he and Agda might have something in common, on that weird night he hadn't hesitated in trying his moves on her.
The young mage still didn't know what to think of the kisses she and Ulfric had passionately exchanged. Rejecting his following advances had been a natural reaction, but Agda couldn't suppress the thought that, had she been born in Skyrim, she would have behaved in a completely different way. After all, Ulfric wasn't the monster she'd been taught to fear: he was a man who believed in his principles, who dreamed of a better future, who fought hard in order to make the world a better place - and when he'd kissed her for the first time, Agda had actually felt comfortable and flattered.
As she tossed and turned in her bed during one of her usual sleepless nights, the Archmage of Winterhold thought once again about Ulfric's kisses. She hadn't hesitated in replying to those displays of passion and deep in her heart she knew that, had the Jarl of Windhelm been a bit gentler and slower, she'd probably gone all the way through with him. When Steinarius had tried to lay his lips on hers more than a fortnight earlier, instead, Agda had immediately denied him that contact.
You behaved like that because you didn't want to get hurt again, a voice in the back of her mind tried to reassure the young mage. You already know that Steinarius is terribly serious about relationships; moreover, you are well aware that he can be a very insensitive companion, which is the reason why you didn't kiss him. With Ulfric, instead, you allowed lust and curiosity to take over. After all, a one night-stand couldn't do you any harm...
Agda did her best to tell herself that the voice was right; yet, she couldn't help but feel that her behavior with Ulfric had been influenced by everything she'd suffered at the hands of Ancano. The Jarl of Windhelm knew what it felt to be tortured by the Thalmor, whereas Steinarius couldn't even imagine it; that's why, for a brief and stupid moment, Agda had thought that Ulfric could be the one to help her forget her past. Now, however, the girl knew that no man in Nirn had the means to save her from her demons - if she wanted to move on, she could rely only on herself.
Led by the desire of a new, better life, Agda soon immerged herself in work.
After her meeting with Ulfric, the girl spent most of her time alone in her office or travelling through Skyrim in order to put a remedy to the damages caused by the Eye of Magnus. During her frequent journeys Agda had the chance to discover more about her homeland; also, she began taking on jobs from many different Jarls, thus allowing the College of Winterhold to gain the trust of the local population. A giant was roaming too close to the roads of the Pale? Faralda, Onmund and Brelyna would immediately intervene. A woman had just been bitten by a bear near Riften? It was Colette's chance to shine. Someone complained about the undead who were roaming through an abandoned mine near Markarth? Tolfdir, Enthir and Niryia were ready to take care of the threat.
As well as providing her colleagues with many different jobs, Agda summoned a lot of famous scholars in Winterhold, so that they could hold special lectures for her and her colleagues. Some mages accepted the invitation, others didn't - yet, those who accepted it didn't regret it at all. Thanks to those visiting teachers, the leaders of the other magic schools of Tamriel soon began to share the same opinion: the new Archmage of Winterhold was young, but she knew what she was doing.
Agda was proud of the rumours that regarded her, but at the same time she found them slightly annoying. She'd never asked to become the leader of the College and she often missed the quiet life she'd left behind upon fleeing from Wayrest; also, she hated being considered a kind of walking legend by most of the people that surrounded her. Despite those problems, however, Agda always did her best to help her school become more famous and appreciated across the whole of Tamriel.
As the months went by, the young Archmage found herself completely surrounded by foreign scholars and interesting projects. Work allowed her to take her mind off her past, therefore Agda spent most of her time discussing the results of her latest researches or venturing through ancient caves in order to unveil their secrets. Unfortunately, that meant that the young Nord never found the chance to come to terms with her demons, a fact that soon began to take a heavy toll on her personality.
To those who didn't know her well, Agda came across as a kind and friendly young woman; nonetheless, those who were well acquainted with her could tell that she had become completely unable to open up to anyone - not to her colleagues, not to her friends, not to the foreign mages who often came to Winterhold and spent a few months teaching there. One of them, a kind Imperial by the name of Jago, actually seemed able to gain Agda's affections for himself - the girl would often smile at him, listen to his lectures, spend long evenings in the library in his company. On a glorious occasion the Archmage and that talented Enchanter even spent the night together, but nothing happened during those long hours - and when Jago returned to Cyrodiil a few days later, those who hoped Agda would find a partner and retrieve her happiness were badly disappointed. That kind girl couldn't think of anything but work - and after her misadventure with Ulfric and Steinarius' departure for the Reach, her chances to build a happy life with another man were equal to zero. Not even Adaeze could break through the walls Agda had built around her: now that she'd been tasked with leading the only magical school of Skyrim, the girl seemed unable to think of anything but work, thus neglecting her private life and the nightmares that still troubled her sleepless nights.
Six months after Ancano's death, Agda still hadn't received any news from the Dragonborn. Erik and J'zhargo would often write her long letters regarding their training with Delphine, then they'd add a quick note where they mentioned Steinarius and how much he missed her; yet, the man himself seemed utterly unwilling to pick up a pen and write a short letter to Winterhold.
At first Agda was outraged and confused by Steinarius' silence; as the days became weeks and the weeks became months, however, the girl stopped worrying about it. After all, the Dragonborn was likely as busy as she was; also, his emotional instability had probably caused him to forget everything he'd told her after their fight against Ancano.
Although Agda didn't actually realize it, the lack of contact with Steinarius had a series of negative impacts on her personality.
First, the girl forgot about the existence of a thing called 'private life' and focused exclusively on her job.
Second, it made her become stern and detached, a fact that caused the nickname of "Agda the Cold" to fit her like a glove.
Third, that lack of news on Steinarius' side caused Agda to be extremely surprised when a rather relaxed Delphine turned up in Winterhold and asked for a quick chat with her.
Of all the people of Tamriel, the girl had never thought to meet her former boss again.
As she found herself face to face to Delphine, Agda asked herself whether she was daydreaming. She hadn't seen Breton in almost one year and she was surprised to notice that her former boss looked significantly older. At the same time, however, Agda immediately realized that the Head of the Blades hadn't abandoned her usual martial demeanour.
As Brelyna poured them a cup of tea and left them alone in the Headquarters of the Archmage, Agda noticed that Delphine's presence was awakening feelings she thought she'd forgotten once and for all - rage for the way that Breton had carelessly got her involved with Ancano, anger for the way she'd never bothered to visit her after she'd been tortured, hatred for the way she'd considered her nothing but a pawn in her personal war against the Thalmor. With those thoughts running through her mind, Agda found it hard not to kick the Breton out of the College without even listening to what she had to say.
"You have come a long way from Riverwood, Agda", Delphine smiled as she took her first sip of tea. She seemed oblivious of the thoughts that were racing through Agda's mind, but the young Nord knew that to the old warrior there was much more than met the eye. "You used to pour the beverages in our inn, whereas now you have someone else doing that for you", the leader of the Blades added when Agda didn't reply to her comment. "Also, this office is a true bless for an alchemist like you".
Disgusted by the little smile on the Breton's face, Agda turned to look at the little garden inside her headquarters. The girl was outraged by Delphine's calmness and was slowly starting to regret the choice of welcoming her in her office. How could that arrogant woman come back into her life and pretend that things between them were perfectly fine?
"People only see the beauty of this garden", Agda slowly said while eyeing that wonderful oasis of peace in the middle of her room. If Delphine wanted to act as though nothing had happened over the previous months, she was in for a bad surprise. "Yet, people don't see how much attention this place costs me. I have to take care of it every day, I have to use special potions to keep the plants alive, I have to make sure they have everything they need... Unfortunately, the same goes for my new role as the Archmage of Winterhold: people only see the beautiful robes I get to wear, but they don't imagine what hides behind them".
Another person would have probably been confused by that comparison, but Delphine immediately caught the hidden meaning of Agda's words.
"You were tortured, but now you're the leader of the only magic school of Tamriel. That's what you were trying to say, isn't it?"
Surprised by Delphine's quick change of strategy, Agda frowned. Rather than avoiding the unpleasant talks related to her past, the Breton had now chosen to follow the girl' suggestions and face them immediately.
"I know that you suffered a lot, Agda, but look where it got you: you could have become the fat wife of a stupid man who only needed your money and your fertility, instead you have risen through the ranks of the only magical school of Skyrim and you are currently creating your own network of power. I'd say it was worth it".
Agda scoffed at Delphine's comment. Over the previous months she'd created a potion that could perfectly hide her scars from sight and now, for the first time since she'd been tortured by Ancano, the girl regretted drinking it that morning.
"I've never asked for power, Delphine", she pointed out, her brown eyes full of rage and determination. "I only asked for a normal life where I could take decisions for myself. I never wanted to become a martyr in your war against the Thalmor".
"You didn't become a martyr, Agda - on the contrary, you gained the respect of the Thalmor themselves. Had they thought you weak, they would have already avenged Ancano and their other men".
"That is something to be happy about!", Agda humorlessly chuckled. "The Thalmor still haven't killed me, but they'll probably try to avenge their officers when I least expect it. Is that what you're trying to say?"
Delphine slowly nodded.
"Exactly. Time has a different meaning for Men and Mer: the Thalmor will wait until you feel safe and secure, then they will hurt you with all their force. I thought you should be informed".
Agda produced a weird sound between a chuckle and a snort.
"Tell me, Delphine, who gave you this important piece of information? Do you have a friend with a very strong death wish inside the Thalmor Embassy? Or did you trick another poor sod in spying the Dominion on your behalf?"
"Agda, I didn't 'trick you'. You knew who the Thalmor were and you were more than willing to..."
"I was a stupid, Delphine, and you were selfish enough to take advantage of that!", Agda suddenly shouted. She'd heard enough and had finally run out of patience. "You used me when I was at my weakest, just like the Thalmor are planning to do as soon as I lower my guard! You are just like them, or maybe you're even worse!"
Delphine chuckled, then shook her head in what looked like amusement.
"Agda, I..."
"You weren't there while I was fighting for my life, you weren't there when I recovered part of my memories, you weren't there when Steinarius almost got killed during the battle against Ancano!", Agda broke the Breton off with another scream. "You used us as though we were your own little slaves and you didn't even care about the consequences! I could have got killed, Delphine! I could have got killed and..."
"Enough, Agda, I've got this!", Delphine broke the girl off with a bored gesture. "You could have got killed, but you didn't. I may be reckless, Agda, but I always had someone keep a close eye on you. You may not remember it, but I perfectly do".
Those words had the power to stop Agda's outraged shouts alltogether.
"What do you mean that you had someone keep a close eye on me? And what do you know that I don't?"
Delphine reacted to those words with a chuckle. Thankfully enough, she'd managed to calm Agda down.
"I made a promise not to tell a single soul about the identity of my helper. Just know that it is the same person who helped you out too, Agda. Oh, and don't give in to Hermaeus Mora's offer: your missing memories aren't worth your soul, especially if you still dream of a life with Steinarius. Speaking of which, I'm sorry you didn't get to see each other for almost one year".
Just like Delphine had planned, the mention of Steinarius caused Agda to temporarily forget the slight reference to her missing memories.
"I needed the Dragonborn to focus on his job in these last few months, therefore I couldn't allow him to be distracted by his private life", Delphine continued once she was sure she had the girl's attention for herself. "That's why I paid a courier to steal all the letters he wrote for you - and that's why I paid that very same courier to give me the messages you wrote for the Dragonborn before he could get hold of them. In this way, you both started to believe that your favourite person in the world was ignoring you - and thanks to that misunderstanding, you soon forgot about each other and carried on with your life. Gosh, I wish I'd thought of that sooner".
As Delphine stopped talking, Agda remained completely still. She was completely at loss for words: all those months she'd thought Steinarius had forgotten her, while the truth was that that terrible hag had stolen all the letters he had written her.
"You heartless bitch...", Agda hissed once she regained the ability to talk.
"I get called like that quite a lot, Agda, so you'll forgive me if I don't get angry", Delphine smirked in reply. "Back to the reason of my visit, I'm very glad Crepusculus stopped fussing over you. Over the last few months he's turned Erik, Faendal and J'zhargo into excellent dragonhunters, he's trekked in many ruins in order to discover impressive Shouts, he's even defeated a few dragon priests so that he could learn their powers. Yet, now there is only one thing that prevents him from defeating Alduin: he needs to retrieve an Elder Scroll".
Agda frowned at the mention of that precious artifact.
"Why..."
"That isn't important. Right now, the important question is the following: I don't know anything about Elder Scrolls and the same applies to the Greybeards. We thought that someone at the College could help us and, since my team of Blades is busy slaying a dragon nearby, I have decided to pay you a visit. After all, your studies about mysterious artifacts have been getting a lot of attention lately".
There was a long moment of silence during which Agda thought of many things at once. The Thalmor were willing to murder her and were just waiting for the right moment to strike; Delphine knew what had happened to her on that long night in Dawnstar, but didn't want to tell her; Steinarius hadn't forgotten her and was approaching the final battle against Alduin; also, Delphine had come to Winterhold because she needed someone who could point her in the direction of an Elder Scroll - an Elder Scroll Steinarius would likely be forced to retrieve on her behalf.
"Why did you come here?", Agda enquired, her face fixed into a frown. "Where is Steinarius? After all, I think he's the one who will be forced to find the Scroll".
That question was greeted by an amused chuckle.
"I'm glad to see that you haven't changed a bit, Agda", Delphine commented. "Even if you're the Archmage of Winterhold, you're still as naive as a common innkeeper. As I mentioned, I don't want Crepusculus to meet you and forget about his duty once again - that's why I came here in his stead. After all, he needs to be focused if he has to retrieve an Elder Scroll and use it".
"You won't help him find it?"
That question caused Delphine to chuckle.
"Agda, no one will help Crepusculus: not me, not the other Blades, not even the Greybeards. It's a matter of self-preservation: my faction is formed by people who are either too young or too old, whereas Arngeir and his gang despise violence more than anything else in the world. Also, after I ask Steinarius to carry out a certain deed on the Throat of the World, the Greybeards won't look him in the eyes anymore, let alone help him. No, Agda: Crepusculus will have to deal with Alduin on his own. After all, he is the Chosen One: if he's meant to save the world, he'll do it even without our help".
As soon as Delphine said those words, Agda finally understood what she needed to do. She was tired of that scheming hag, she was tired of her mind games, she was tired of the way she was constantly, carelessly toying with her and Steinarius' lives; that's why, with a long sigh, the Archmage of Winterhold slowly got up from her chair and pointed towards the exit of her room.
"I will not help the person who almost caused me to die", she stated with a coldness that perfectly justified her nickname. "Leave, and don't come back again".
Delphine reacted to those words with an amused chuckle. She made to speak, but before she could even realize it the Breton found herself pinned to a pillar in the middle of the room. A magic dagger immediately started swaying back and forth in front of her eyes, whereas a threatening Familiar appeared next to her and began growling in rage. Despite that situation, however, Delphine chuckled again.
"Agda, if you think you can impress me..."
"I don't want to impress you", the Archmage of Winterhold hissed in reply. "I want you to leave and never turn up in this place again, otherwise Alduin and the Thalmor will be the last of your worries".
Delphine analyzed Agda's face for what felt like a lifetime. When she found no hints of doubts hidden in her tired traits, the Breton sighed in defeat.
"I will do as you ask, Agda", she eventually gave in. "I will leave the College and I will find that Scroll without your help. Now let me go".
Confronted with that harsh command, for a brief moment Agda entertained the idea of keeping Delphine trapped in her room, of forcing her to reveal everything she knew about her missing memories, of hurting her just like Ancano had done with her. Eventually, however, the young girl couldn't bring herself to do that - after all, unlike Delphine, she wasn't a monster. Also, Agda had no idea whether she was bluffing or not.
As she was released from her restraints, thr Breton smiled. She elegantly walked towards the door, then she turned to look at Agda one last time.
"I'm proud of you, girl", she said, the ghost of a smile on her lips. "And I'm proud of me too, actually: you may hate me, but I am the one who allowed you to become the fierce woman you are today. You owe me a favor, Agda - don't you ever forget that".
And with those words, Delphine finally disappeared from Agda's life.
After her meeting with Delphine, Agda felt very weird for the rest of the afternoon. Part of her wished she'd forced the woman to reveal everything she knew about her missing memories, whereas part of her thought that the Breton had made that up in order to gain her attention. Agda also had troubles believing what the woman had told her about the Thalmor's plans for her, as she couldn't imagine how a normal spy could get access to that kind of information. Most of all, however, the girl was troubled by the news regarding Steinarius.
That night, as she was tossing and turning in her bed and thinking of the dangers the Dragonborn was about to face, Agda was distracted by a light knock on her door. When she answered it, the mage found herself face to face with a rather embarassed Brelyna.
"Archmage, I'm sorry to bother you at this time of the night, but you have a visitor".
Frowning, Agda put on a heavy cloak and followed the visibly distressed Dunmer down the flight of stairs that led to the courtyard of the College. Once there, the girl deadpanned.
Standing still in the middle of that wide area was a rather embarassed Steinarius. Agda had never seen him like that: his eyes were golden, his hair were tousled, his face and mouth were completely covered in blood. On top of that, the Imperial was wearing just an awkwardly small piece of cloth around his loin and a half-broken Amulet of Talos around his neck. No wonder Brelyna had looked so shocked after meeting him.
When Agda finally overcame her surprise and took a step towards him, Steinarius sheepishly ran a hand through his hair.
"Agda, believe me when I say that I wasn't planning to turn up in Winterhold half-naked", he said before the girl could ask him anything. "Actually, I wasn't planning to turn up in Winterhold at all. It's just... I had a very bad argument with Delphine and now I need somewhere to sleep".
It took a couple of seconds for those words to sink in. When they did, Agda frowned - judging from his state, Steinarius had probably turned into a werewolf after his argument with Delphine.
"The blood around your mouth..."
"Not Delphine's", Steinarius immediately clarified. "I'm afraid I took my rage out on a poor elk. You... you don't happen to have a free bed in the College, right? I should have probably gone to the inn, but I'm afraid they would have called the guards upon noticing that I'm almost naked. I know that for some reason you didn't reply to any of the letters I sent you over the last six months, but I thought that maybe..."
Steinarius didn't get to finish that sentence: when Agda ran towards him and threw her arms around his neck, he could only smile and hold her tight to his chest.
Agda watched as Steinarius nervously paced up and down her room. The man had taken a bath and was now dressed in the civilian clothes the girl had found in an old crate. Although it had been more than a hour since his arrival in Winterhold, the Dragonborn's eyes were still golden with rage.
"That bitch", he said once Agda was done telling him about her recent encounter with Delphine. "Stealing all of our letters so that we couldn't speak to each other... There should be a Plane of Oblivion for people like her".
Agda nodded. That long day had been full of surprises and seeing Steinarius after six long months had probably been the best one.
"When you didn't reply to my letters, I even gave up the idea of visiting you in Winterhold", the man went on explaining her. "Actually, I avoided this place like plague because I thought you were angry at me. That bitch!"
When Steinarius began insulting Delphine once again, Agda sighed.
"Stein, you've been here for more than an hour, but you still haven't told me why you argued with Delphine. You've put up with her for almost two years, why did you suddenly snap?"
Confronted with that question, the man finally stopped walking and looked Agda in the eyes.
"You know how it works with Delphine: she treats people like puppets, that's what she does - and she's fucking good at it too. Somehow, that bitch made me believe she was the only one who could help me defeat Alduin. She forced me to train hard every day, so that now I'm as ready to face my calling as I'll ever be. I've become faster, stronger, heavier... Geez, none of my old shirts fits me anymore!"
When Steinarius opened his arms to underline that comment, Agda immediately noticed the slight changes in his physique. The Imperial had a lean and agile built that no training could ever change; yet, after spending six months with Delphine, the muscles on his torso and on his arms had become even more defined than before.
"As well as training my body, Delphine forced me to study a lot of books about dragons. She said it would help me and, as a matter of fact, it actually did - at least, now I know more about the dragon cult and the heroes of old. Also, during my time with Delphine I learned powerful Shouts and visited ancient temples in order to discover more about dragon priests. On top of that, Delphine forced me to kill a dragon once every three days, whereas Esbern created powerful potions that could increase my strength. Thanks to them, I've basically become a dragonslaying machine with the ability to breath and talk".
"It doesn't sound so bad", Agda carefully said. "Why did you argue with them then?"
Confronted with that question, Steinarius scoffed.
"Agda, during the last six months Delphine has tried to turn me against the Greybeards in every possible way. She and I had our ups and downs, and most of the downs were connected to this topic.
"Delphine considers the monks to be her enemies just because I trust them. That hag often tried to cause arguments between me and Arngeir, but she never succeeded. Angered by that situation, Delphine has given me an ultimatum: if I don't want her to kick me out of the Blades, I'll have to kill the leader of the Greybeards".
For the umpteenth time in that long day, Agda's jaw dropped to the ground because of the shock.
"DELPHINE DID WHAT? BUT ARNGEIR..."
"Agds, Arngeir isn't the true eader of the Greybeards", Steinarius slowly said. He was choosing the words with great care, a fact that Agda didn't fail to notice. "Actually, the true leader of the Greybeards isn't what you'd expect him to be at all. He's old, incredibly old, and he has a bit of a shady past. That's why Delphine wants me to kill him: because she doesn't accept that people can overcome the evil that lies in their hearts. Also, this is the exact reason why she asked me, of all people, to carry out the deed: to her, I am already rotten, as I am Dragonborn and werewolf and Champion to a couple Daedras. What difference would it make to add murderer to the list of monstruosities that already describe me?"
"Stein, you are not a monster", Agda softly said in reply to her friend's question.
"No, of course not", the man humorlessly chuckled. "I came here in my werewolf form and scared the lives out of a few travellers, but I'm not a monster. Also, I might have caused poor J'zhargo to give up on Skooma, as he probably saw me shift while I was still inside our camp. And don't forget that I hurt Delphine rather badly".
Agda frowned at that.
"You attacked her?"
"She forced me to!", Steinarius said with a very defensive tone. "She'd positioned herself in front of the exit to her tent and wouldn't get out of my way. When she went for her dagger, I shouted her off her feet and she might have accidentally ended up in the pile of dirt our horses produced during our stay in that camp. I didn't do it on purpose, though!"
With great efforts, Agda managed to stifle a laughter.
"Well, at least she had a soft landing", she smirked. "She didn't deserve it, though".
Steinarius was silent for a brief moment, then he let out a quick laugh that reminded Agda of a bark. A moment later, however, he surprised the girl by grabbing the cloak she had provided him and putting it around his shoulders.
"It's two o'clock in the morning, but I'm still too angry to sleep", he announced. "Since I don't want to spend the rest of the night cursing Delphine and the way she kicked me out of the Blades after all I did for her, I think I'll go to the library and find out more about the Elder Scrolls. After all, they're the last thing that keeps me from slaying Alduin".
Agda carefully analyzed Steinarius' face. That long day had been full of surprises for both of them: Delphine had tried to use them for their own means, but the two friends had finally succeeded in breaking free of her chains. Agda was very happy about it, but she could tell that Steinarius had mixed feelings - after all, it wasn't easy to give up on the Blades after spending half a year training them and teaching them how to become dragonhunters.
When Steinarius eventually walked towards the door, Agda did something the Imperial hadn't been expecting: she called his name, then she got up from her seat and opened one of the many cupboards of her room. When she found what she was looking for, the girl finally returned to Steinarius.
"Delphine visited me because I have recently made a research about the Elder Scrolls", the girl explained. "During that study I asked one of my colleagues to visit a former mage of the College. The guy is as mad as a hat, but he provided us with the answers you need to defeat Alduin. There is one Elder Scroll in Skyrim and it is hidden in one of the worst places of whole Tamriel".
As Agda spoke, Steinarius slowly approached her. He exploited his height to take a look at the map the girl was holding in her hands, then he frowned.
"Blackreach", he said in a low, angry hiss. "I'll have to go to Blackreach. And now that I've been kicked out of the Blades, I won't even be able to count on Erik and the others".
"We will go to Blackreach, Stein", Agda was quick to correct her friend. "After all the efforts I made to get this map, I'm not keen on letting let you take all the glory for yourself".
As he heard those words, Steinarius thought that Agda was making fun of him. Yet, as he looked in her brown eyes and saw the determination that burnt there, the man felt his heart swell with joy.
Despite Delphine's tricks, that young mage was still on his side.