Author's note:
My dear readers, here I am to wish a Merry (belated) Christmas to all those of you who celebrate it; also, here I am to present you with my very personal Christmas gift to you all.
First of all, let me thank all my readers, favouriters and followers: you are growing day after day and I'm extremely thankful for your support!
The special mentions of the week go to Elspeth, MeanE and ShpperofTrashyShips. As for ShpperofTrashyShips, I thank you for underlining that you now have a new nickname and I apologize for not noticing it earlier. Forgetful writer is forgetful! Also, your new nickname had me curious about what kind of trashy ships you actually ship. Are Agda and Steinarius included in the list? XD Also, glad that you enjoyed Steinarius' passion for goats!
As for MeanE, I must say that their review really had me laughing. I am evil indeed and I do not like happy endings, but I still haven't decided whether I'll be evil to Agda and Steinarius too. I've grown so fond of them and I really want them to be happy! In the meanwhile, however, I suggest you getting ready for the worst: one never knows - and luckily enough, boxes of tissues are not so expensive.
Last but not least, a huge thank you to Elspeth. You are one of my long-time reviewers and I really have to thank you for your support and for your appreciation!
Back to my Christmas gift, here's a new instalment for you all. It is a bit short, but I absolutely wanted to post something today. Also, the next chapter of TAaTW will probably be out on Sunday, therefore stay tuned to find out more about Agda and Stein's adventure. Speaking of which, this is a filler instalment, but it is very important to get the story moving.
Enjoy!
1st of Sun's Height, 4E 203
As he put on his boots, Steinarius gave Agda a loving look. They had arrived at High Hrothgar on the previous evening, at the end of a long and tiring day. The two of them had actually hoped to reach the monastery before sunset, but on the previous morning they had been too occupied with lust to set off at a decent hour. Steinarius and Agda had made love to each other in bed, in the bath and another couple of places - and by the time they left for the monastery, the sun had already reached its peak. During the following hours, Agda's complicated relationship with physical activity had forced them to proceed at a very slow pace - and had Steinarius not taken the girl in his arms, the journey up the Seven Thousand Steps would have taken them even longer. Eventually, however, the two lovers had arrived at the seat of the Greybeards and had been greeted by the local monks.
Upon reaching High Hrotgar, Agda had been shocked by its solid structure and legendary aura; yet, she'd been very disappointed by the way Arngeir and the others had treated her. The monks weren't used to having random female mages around them - and they'd made that known by giving Agda a long list of things she couldn't do in the monastery. Don't cast spells, don't sing, don't curse, don't get undressed in public places... Agda had felt rather offended by that respectless list, therefore Steinarius had decided to spend the evening with her in the tall meditation tower located in the courtyard of High Hrothgar. Once there, the Dragonborn had tried to keep his promise to Arngeir - the promise Steinarius had made during an awkward conversation about monks and dragons and sex -, but had miserably failed: on the previous night, with the moon shining in their eyes, the snow falling from the sky and the fire crackling beside them, Agda and the warrior had made passionate love to each other on the little terrace of the meditation tower. That place technically didn't belong to the monastery, but that awareness wasn't enough to cancel Steinarius' feelings of guilt. As he looked at Agda, however, the man realized he didn't regret anything he had done over the previous night, or week or year.
That morning the young Nord was particularly beautiful, Steinarius thought with a smile. She was still asleep, her hair covering her face and her hands clinging tight to the warm blankets. Her baggy nightgown had left her shoulder bare, whereas the furs didn't cover one of her legs - the same leg that until a few minutes earlier had been intertwined with Steinarius'.
Still smiling, the man leant towards his woman and gently brushed her hair away from her face. Her scars were very evident despite the darkness, but Steinarius didn't even notice them: after all that time, he had even forgotten they were there.
Sighing, the Dragonborn made to leave the room and visit Arngeir for their upcoming meeting. He was about to head for the Throat of the World and use the Scroll he had retrieved in Blackreach, a fact that made him very nervous. According to the monks, reading that ancient manufact on the Throat of the World was likely to draw Alduin's attention and cause the ancient dragon to fly there in order to face his opponent - and that was something Steinarius desperately wanted to avoid. Unfortunately, there was no other way to learn the infamous Dragonrend Shout but to read the Scroll on the tallest mountain of Skyrim, with Paarthurnax there to offer his guidance and wisdom.
As he thought about the old dragon, Steinarius couldn't help but look at Agda again. He hadn't revealed her the true identity of the Master of the Greybeards - after all, he wanted to save her from the shock he himself had experienced upon making that discovery; at the same time, however, the man couldn't help but feel unease at hiding that important detail from his beloved mage.
While Steinarius was still pondering about his feelings, Agda softly whimpered in her sleep. Confronted with that sound, the Dragonborn suddenly felt the need to go back to bed and caress her again.
"I'm doing this for us", he whispered as he gently stroked Agda's curls. "So that one day we can be happy together".
Still talking, the Dragonborn allowed his hands to travel along Agda's face and shoulders and sides until they finally came to rest on her belly. Steinarius had lost count of the times he and the young mage had made love to each other over the previous hours, but he hadn't forgotten their heartbreaking talk from two nights earlier. Considering that they hadn't taken any precautions, the Imperial found himself hoping that the young mage in front of his eyes would soon carry his child; at the same time, however, that possibility caused him to feel guilty and afraid. Leaving Agda behind in order to fight Alduin was bad enough as it was - leaving a pregnant Agda behind, however, was a hundredth time worse.
Sighing at the thought, Steinarius gently ran his hands along Agda's bare leg. He kissed the girl on her forehead, then he kissed her gently on her bare knee. When he finally made to leave, the mage unexpectedly opened her eyes and whispered his name. The woman's voice was fleeble and confused, whereas her eyes were full of tiredness. Steinarius shushed her, then he walked back to her.
"Good morning", he softly whispered while brushing her forehead with her hand.
Agda replied with a tiny whimper, then she nuzzled her face against Steinarius' hand. The man immediately leant down towards her and kissed her languidly on the lips.
"Where are you going?", the girl asked when the Imperial finally pulled away from her. She had noticed that Steinarius was wearing the new steel armor Adrianne had smithed for him, a fact that immediately rang a bell in her head.
"You know where I'm going, Agds: I'm visiting Arngeir, then I'm going to the Throat of the World to meet the leader of the Greybeards and read the Elder Scroll with him".
"And why are you wearing your best armor?"
"There are many ice wraiths and frost trolls on the way", Steinarius lied. He knew that Alduin might decide to pay him a visit, but he didn't want Agda to worry about it. "The armor will help me defeat them".
Although the Imperial had used his most convincing tone, Agda frowned in suspicion. She made to say something, but Steinarius stopped her by kissing her lips once again.
"I need to go now", he whispered. "Arngeir is waiting for me and I'm already late. I'll talk to him over breakfast, then I'll leave for the Throat of the World. Go back to sleep, honey: by the time you wake up, I'll have already returned to this very same room".
Agda made to protest, but the tiredness in her eyes helped Steinarius understand that, for once, that stubborn woman would listen to him and fall asleep again in a matter of minutes. Confronted with her weary expression, the Imperial smiled; then, with one last sigh and a silent prayer, he set off to meet Paarthurnax.
Steinarius breathed in the fresh air of Skyrim. The Throat of the World was always the same - snow everywhere, dragon bones scattered around, freezing gusts of cold wind every once in a while -, but the Imperial felt deeply different from the last time he had visited that place. Back then he was still a puppet hanging from Delphine's strings; now instead Steinarius was free, as free as the dragons whose fire ran through his veins and as the eagles that dominated the skies of the land he loved more than any other place in Tamriel; but most of all, the Dragonborn was now happy and satisfied with his existence.
As predictble, most of that happiness depended on Agda. The former innkeeper was everything Steinarius had ever dreamed of: she was sweet and kind and fun and, to his eyes, she was the most beautiful woman of the world.
Even then, as he walked towards Paarthurnax's lair and prepared to greet the ancient dragon, Steinarius couldn't help but think of his desire to build a family with the wonderful mage he had left behind at the monastery. A few years earlier Vigdis had got pregnant before she and her man could even voice the desire to have children and now Steinarius wished the same would happen to Agda. Every step he took, the Imperial couldn't prevent himself from imagining a baby with his hooked nose and Agda's brown eyes - and that thought was enough to speed up his heartbeat and make a wild smile appear on his face. Unfortunately for Steinarius, with happiness came fear.
After Vigdis' escape, the Dragonborn had stopped worrying about death - quite on the contrary, he had become the boldest warrior of the Imperial Legion. He was always the first one to attack, always the first one to volunteer on dangerous quests, always the first one to risk his life in hopeless missions. Even after discovering that the fate of the world depended on him, Steinarius had never really worried about the dangers connected to his title because he thought that, all in all, there had to be a reason why the Divines had chosen him. Now, however, Steinarius Crepusculus found himself afraid for the first time in years. He wasn't scared of pain or dangers or sufferance - he was scared of dying and leaving a broken and desperate Agda behind.
There was a sudden flap of wings and Paarthurnax appeared in Steinarius' visual field, thus snapping the Imperial out of his thoughts. The ancient dragon carefully landed on a rock, then pointed his scaly mouth towards the human.
"You have found peace, dovahkiin", he said with his ancient and booming voice.
And as he heard those words and thought of Agda, Steinarius nodded. He had found peace in the deep eyes of that young mage and he was ready to kill Alduin in order to spend the rest of her life with her.
Her teeth clattering because of the low temperatures, Agda walked towards the meditation tower of High Hrotghar. Arngeir had greeted her with the usual coldness, therefore the girl had decided to eat her breakfast in the courtyard of the monastery. The mage felt as though the monk knew about the actions she and Steinarius had performed in that very same place no later than 12 hours earlier, so she didn't feel at ease around him; also, she didn't feel at ease knowing that her man had set off alone to meet the mysterious leader of the Greybeards.
As another gust of wind invested her, Agda muttered a curse under her breath. It was summer, but on the Throat of the World the temperatures were constantly cold. In an attempt to get some warmth, the girl found shelter at the bottom of the meditation tower and began crunching on a loaf of bread. Her hands were shaking because of the cold, but the young mage had no desire to eat in the halls of the monastery, under Arngeir's suspicious gaze.
Sighing, Agda thought once again of Steinarius. Had he been there with her, her man would have surely shared his body warmth with her; right then, however, his beloved Imperial was on the top of the Throat of the World, so close yet so far away from her. At least he was probably safe, Agda scoffed - and as soon as that thought took form in his mind, a dark shadow appeared on the horizon.
After travelling with the savior of Skyrim for what felt like a lifetime, Agda had become quite an expert at recognizing dragons. She still remembered the creature that had attacked Riverwood more than one year earlier, just like she remembered the beasts she'd met outside Labyrinthian, in Blackreach and on the road to Winterhold too. Yet, that wasn't enough to prepare her for what she saw in that moment. A huge dragon was approaching - a huge, dark dragon that immediately caused her to be overrun by fear and anxiety for her man.
Alduin had discovered that Steinarius now had the means to defeat him - and the ancient God of Destruction was determined to erase that arrogant human from the face of Nirn.
At first Agda couldn't believe what her brain was telling her: Alduin is attacking us, go and find a shelter.
Unfortunately, when Arngeir ran out of the monastery and shouted very similar words, the mage realized that the creature that was approaching High Hrotghar was Steinarius' sworn enemy indeed.
Upon making that discovery, Agda's first instinct was to grab her cloak, her bread and her terror and find shelter in the monastery, just like Arngeir was suggesting. Then, however, the worry for Steinarius defeated the fear for her own life - and that's why, without thinking twice, the young mage cast an invisibility spell and ran towards the path that led to the Throat of the World.
While running, Agda realized that Arngeir was screaming her name and telling her that she couldn't face the road that led to Paarthurnax without the proper training.
"Proper training my ass", the girl snorted under her breath. She was the best mage of Skyrim, she was brave, she was clever - but most of all, she was in love with the man Alduin had come to destroy. Driven by fear for his fate, Agda lost all property and politeness - and together with that, she also lost her traditional prudence.
The girl didn't realize her mistake until she opened the iron gate of High Hrotghar with a spell and ran past it as fast as she could. Only then did she notice how strong the wind in that area was.
For a moment, Agda felt the need to stop her desperate run and look for another way to reach her man. The path in front of her was narrow and covered in ice, whereas the gusts of wind were incredibly violent and prevented her from seeing where she was walking. Then, however, Agda heard the strangled roar of a dragon - and when she noticed that Alduin was flying towards the top of the mountain without bothering about the monastery, she immediately took her decision.
From his position near the monastery, a desperate Arngeir saw the young mage set off into the sea of fog and wind and snow in front of her eyes and immediately decided to use a Shout to approach her. By the time he got to Agda, however, it was already too late: the strong wind had caused a few rocks to fall from the side of the mountain - and as some of them collided with her head, Agda of Anvil lost consciousness and drifted into darkness.
"Balgruuf will never allow you to use Dragonsreach as a trap", Agda heard an old, tired voice say.
"I know, but it's my only chance to find Alduin. He is at his weakest now and I may not have another chance to defeat him".
"I wish you didn't have to do this, child", the old voice from earlier sighed. "Not now that you have finally found a reason to live. Apropos, I'd better get going: your mage will awaken soon. Tell her that she was lucky I was there to help her with her concussion and that I will not tolerate her presence in the courtyard anymore".
A chair rattled against the stone floor of the chamber, then Agda heard the sounds of footsteps fading in the distance.
Grimacing, the girl realized that she had a splitting headache and that she felt on the brink of throwing up. The girl had no clue as to why she was feeling so bad.
"You gave me quite a fright, you stubborn little mage", someone whispered at her side - and a moment later, when that very same someone slowly caressed her hair, Agda understood that she was reunited with Steinarius. The simple thought was enough for her to snap her eyes open and try to sit up.
As she found herself in a sitting position, Agda understood that she was in a makeshift bed in the most isolated room of High Hrotghar. Before she could notice anything else, however, the light of the nearby candles and her rapid movements caused her to feel particularly dizzy.
"Easy", Steinarius said, his voice serious and his hands ready to grab Agda by the shoulders. "You've got hurt quite badly".
As her man helped her lay down again, Agda noticed that his expression was very stern and tired. The Imperial also had a vast burning on his cheek, which had probably convinced him to shave what was left of the beard he had struggled so much to maintain over the previous weeks. As she noticed that, Agda immediately remembered about Alduin.
"You're alive", she said, relief well evident in her voice. The lights of the candles were worsening her nausea, but the girl wanted to keep her eyes open to study the expression of her companion. "I feared..."
"I'm alive, Agda", Steinarius sternly broke the girl off. "And you're alive too, even if tried hard to kill yourself".
Frowning, Agda brought her hand to her temples. As she did, she noticed the heavy bandage wrapped around her head and faintly remembered being hit by a rock while trying to reach the Top of the World.
"Stein, what... what happened?", she asked, confusion well evident in her voice.
Steinarius sighed, then he ran a hand across his face.
"You don't remember", the Imperial snorted. His eyes were slowly becoming golden, a fact that made Agda unease. "Of course you don't: you've been unconscious for the last two hours because you hit your head on a rock, all while trying to pull off some kind of silly heroic deed. Well, here's what happened, sweetheart: Alduin attacked me as soon as I read the Elder Scroll and I miracoulously managed to have the upper hand. My enemy fled from me, so I immediately made my way back to the monastery. And what did I find when I arrived? My beloved Agda, lying unconscious on a bed because she's too stubborn to listen to Arngeir's advice! Do you have any idea as to how scared I was when I returned to High Hrotghar without knowing whether Alduin had attacked the monastery or not? Do you have any idea as to how I felt when I discovered that everyone was fine, but you'd been injured in such a foolish way? Do you have any idea as to how I felt when I realized that I cannot really focus on Alduin as long as you're around, because you always end up distracting me? Damn it Agds, how can I fulfill my destiny when you're too busy trying to slip off a cliff and commit suicide while I'm fighting against my sworn enemy?! There's a reason if I left you behind this morning, and there's a reason if Arngeir told you not to take the path to the Throat of the World!"
When Steinarius stopped talking, Agda felt her eyes fill with tears. The Imperial sounded deeply hurt and angry and disappointed and, for once, Agda had to admit that he wasn't particularly wrong.
"You could have explained me where you were going", she whispered, her voice weak and fleeble. "You could have told me that Alduin was going to attack you, but I couldn't help you for some strange reason I don't know. Instead you just left and told me nothing".
"It's because I wanted to protect you, Agds".
Confronted with those words, the mage scoffed.
"You've been trying to protect me for years, Stein", she said. "I thought we were well past that, but you still think...".
"I simply think that you're the woman I love more than anything else in the world and that I'm the only one who can defeat Alduin", Steinarius broke the mage off. Rather than angry, the man now sounded tired and sad. "That's why I saw no reason in dragging you along to the Throat of the World. I would have got distracted while trying to protect you, and you might have got hurt trying to protect me - and should something happen to you because of Alduin, I..."
As Steinarius trailed off, he hid his face in his hands and sighed a couple of times.
"I'm a fool", he whispered after a long break. "You're in this state and I'm shouting and getting mad at you. I'm sorry Agds: it's just that sometimes I have the feeling you think you're the only one who knows what's better for the two of us. Sometimes, however, it would be nice if you listened to me and understood that my choices are driven by the desire to make you happy, not by some silly wish to prove that I'm better than you".
As Steinarius said those words, Agda realized that, for once, she had really acted in a dangerous and foolish way. As the first tears began to run down her cheeks, the girl couldn't prevent a sob to escape her mouth.
"Arngeir had told me that concussion can cause people to feel particularly sensitive", Steinarius sighed when he noticed that. "I'm sorry Agds, I really am".
Frowning, the man used a cloth to wipe the tears off Agda's face.
"Arngeir told me he doesn't keep healing potions here in the monastery", he whispered once the mage slightly calmed down. "I have a few vials in my knapsack, though. Would that help you?"
When Agda nodded, Steinarius was quick to retrieve a few healing potions from his baggage. He helped the girl pour one of them, then he leant towards her until his forehead brushed against hers.
"Better?"
Agda nodded, then she raised a hand to caress the burning on the Imperial's cheeks. The man was quick to grab her wrist and place a series of kisses on each of her knuckles, thus causing the mage to smile at him.
"I'm so happy to see you're fine", Agda whispered. "Now that you've forced Alduin to escape, what's our next move?"
Steinarius was silent for a second, then he sighed.
"There's only one way to discover Alduin's hiding place: trapping one of his lieutenants and forcing him to reveal us that information. I can think of only place that can keep a dragon captive as long as we want, and that place is Dragonsreach".
When Agda frowned, Steinarius thought she was about to call him crazy. Instead, the mage slowly sat up on her bed and looked into his grey eyes.
"Fine", she said, determination well evident in her voice. "Let's go imprison a dragon".