Impulse Chapter 15

Lena pushed the keyboard away and expelled a frustrated huff. She leaned back in her executive chair and swivelled around to gaze out of the expansive windows to the acres of meticulous manicured gardens and thick grove of trees beyond. The club owner had been trying to get through some of the mountains of paperwork that never seemed to dwindle in the comfort of her home office, which was quiet and free of distractions, mainly consisting of whining employees with petty problems that could be easily remedied without her. She had snapped at both Dusty and her best friend Sam, telling them in no uncertain terms that they were in charge unless it was an emergency of the most critical of circumstances. Lena winced as she recalled the moisture that welled in Dusty's eyes after her tirade in a frosty, short tone that had caused the sweet butch to shrink visibly in front of her. Sam had just raised her eyebrows and her hands as if fending of a blow and given her a look that said Lena was going off the deep end and she had to calm the fuck down. But her emotions were so close to the surface swirling and gathering power like a hurricane and she found herself unpredictable and irritable and had finally retreated to the mansion, before she drove all of her employees away. Lena prided herself on being a fair and amenable boss, while still being aloof and emotionally distant to all, but a few of her most trusted. Namely, Sam, Dusty and Jack, who managed the gay boys side of her strip club. He had escaped her wrath that day, but Sam had informed her that she had passed on her new directives.

Lena's thought's then drifted to Kara as it had from the moment they'd met, but more so lately and it wasn't with the usual lust and fondness either. No, now her thoughts were of worry and concern and a helpless feeling of inadequacy. Lena's thought's went back to that night.

It had been a week since she had awoken from dozing on the couch to see Kara's blonde head peeking above the black leather armchair that sat facing the window giving a full view of the bar, floor and stage below. The stage lighting cast a flashing rainbow of colours across the side profile of her superhero lover. But she hadn't looked so Super when Kara had turned to gaze at her upon noticing that she had awoken. She looked desolate and lost and Lena had scrambled up from the couch as quickly as her healing injuries would allow and rushed to her lovers side.

"Kara, baby? What is it?"

Tears were glistening in those gorgeous blue eyes and her throat bobbed as she swallowed. Kara closed her eyes and the tears released and rolled over her cheeks. The blonde head shook a little from side to side and she opened and closed her mouth several times, but no sound escaped. Lena had knelt in front of Kara and pressed her hands over the obviously distraught Superhero's hands that were tightly clenched fists in her lap.

"Kara, please. You're scaring me." Lena glanced at the clock on the wall behind her desk. "You were gone over three hours. Did you find them? Oh, God! You did didn't you!"

Blue eyes opened and locked with Lena's green. "That's not... Yes, but..." Kara's voice had been barely above a whisper with an emotional cracking to it. "Can I have some water please?"

Lena understood that Kara needed a few more moments to get herself together and the club owner gave it to her willingly. After Kara crushed the first bottle sending water everywhere, Lena helped the second to the blondes lips to sip. "Kara, if you need more time to process whatever you found, I'll give it to you. I'll give and do anything for you."

Lena's heartfelt declaration seemed to bolster Kara somewhat. "Oh, Lena. I just don't understand humanity sometimes. I found twelve different sets of ...of...human r-remains. One of them a small child. I had Alex pinpoint each location so that the police could recover them. Two were bundled together. They were fresh and I think they were your missing dancers. Some were, just bones and had obviously been there a long time. I just don't understand, Lena! How humans can undervalue life and take it so easily. Rao, I just. Alex didn't even seem surprised. So many lives taken and she wasn't shocked by what I had found!" The look Kara gave her, near broke Lena's heart in two.

"I guess humanity has lived through a multitude of monstrous travesties in it's history and we see it on the news from the time we are old enough to understand, that it has just become a part of human nature. It is such a broad term and covers the entire spectrum of human traits from the purest of good to the darkest of evil. Most of us are a blending of good and bad depending on the circumstances, the scales often balancing a little more in favour either side depending on the person. We are complex creatures and scientists have studied the what's and why's that make certain people lean towards the evil. Is it a lack of some kind of brain chemistry, electrons that light up some sections of the brain that causes some people to have no conscience or lack of self control. A lack of a soul. It's complicated, honey and unfortunately you see the worst of us on a regular basis. There are bottom dwelling scum like Bubba that do bad things for money and the thrill of it and then there are people like my brother who is a megalomaniac who thrives on power and making everyone else feel inferior to his intellect. My brother and others like him are a bazillion times worse than the Bubba's and other petty criminals of this world. Though it seems Bubba is moving up in the evil department lately.

I'm sorry for what you found, Kara, but at least now over the coming weeks some families may get some closure because of what you discovered tonight. I know it isn't much to console you, but I also know that without you this city would be a lot darker and scarier to live in. You symbolise hope to so many in National City, Kara, and like me, it makes us want to be better. To try just a little bit harder to let our good sides win."

"Thank you, Lena. You're right, it's not much of a consolation, but I thank you for saying it. I'm tired. But I'm not sure I can close my eyes and not see all those remain pulled out of the river. It just makes me wonder what else I've missed, you know."

"Kara, do you remember what, Alex told you earlier when you wanted to rip Bubba's head off?"

Kara frowned in concentration. "Uh, that he is a human police problem not a Supergirl problem. Because, I don't just go around ripping human criminals heads off. That we need proof to take him down." Kara pouted unhappily. "I heard all the proof I need, but it doesn't amount to anything, because I heard it with my super hearing ability, but that doesn't mean I don't still wanna rip his disgusting head off."

Lena laughed and leaned forward to brush a chaste kiss upon Kara's lips, "that makes two of us, my love. But let's leave it to the experts for now, yeah? Will you fly us home?"

Kara stood and lifted Lena upon one graceful motion. She smiled softly, but it didn't reach her eyes. "It would be my pleasure."

Lena had held Kara for the remainder of that night, but neither of them slept for long. Kara plagued by what she had found and Lena blaming herself for Kara getting involved in this Bubba business in the first place, despite the fact that she'd be dead if she hadn't.

Lena let out a weary sigh as she swivelled her office chair to face her desk and the illuminated computer screen. Her eyes flicked to the two lilies and the small envelope that had accompanied the flowers and had been discovered on her front door step several nights ago. She didn't have to pull out the shiny plain black card with the bold white writing to remember what it said. She could see it in her minds eye, plain as day. She shuddered, how disturbing just a few words could be.

Glad you're not dead, Sis.

L

Lena, of course, shouldn't have been surprised that her brother was acquainted with Bubba. That fat, greasy wannabe gangster was a tiny minnow in a very big pond and her brother was most likely the top apex predator. Lena had no doubt that it was one of Lex's associates that had called off the hit Bubba had put on her that night Kara's second alter ego Jack had visited Buda Bing and overheard. Because in Lex's warped mind no one could try to kill her, but him, perhaps with the exception of Lillian. Though, Lillian was more likely to berate and belittle rather than kill her. Bubba was lucky he hadn't been fitted with new concrete shoes for messing with Lena. Lex must have been feeling generous or perhaps Bubba hadn't outlived his usefulness as yet. Lena had taken strenuous efforts not to think about Lex, or her mother for that matter and it was giving her a headache thinking about them now and wondering just what nefarious deeds they were committing at this very moment.

The club owner noted that her office was now only lit by her computer monitor the sun having set whilst she was lost in her troublesome thoughts. She turned on the ornate art deco lamp and checked her phone for messages. One missed call from Dusty and a text from Sam with a lovely photo attached of her god-daughter Ruby inviting her over for dinner soon with a side note to bring her new girlfriend. But no calls or texts from Kara. Lena was so very concerned about her. Kara had taken to doing extra patrols on top of her regular job and crime fighting missions. The light had dimmed in her girlfriends eyes. They were now haunted and her shoulders were heavy with a burden of her own making. Kara blamed herself for not saving those unfortunate souls from the river. That she had let the citizens of her city down and Lena felt bad because she just wanted her sunny, bouncy, adorkable and downright lovable girlfriend back. Lena felt bad because she was irritable that Kara hadn't touched her beyond a few hugs and too chaste for her liking kisses since that fateful night. Lena had an incredibly high sex drive and the self service she'd been doing wasn't making a dent in her sexual frustrations. Lena would normally go to Impulse and pick out a sexy, willing playmate to take care of her needs, but Lena was fighting that dreaded urge because her heart thudded heavily in her chest with the thought of cheating on Kara.

She never in a million years thought she'd be one of 'those people'. Saps that fell in love and committed to that one person, but here she was and she was downright cranky about it. Lena was annoyed that Kara had failed to detect that she had been noticeably testy and cool with Kara when she showed up late and crawled into bed with a mumbled greeting and falling to sleep almost as soon as the blonde head hit the pillow. Kara held her protectively and Lena's heart would trip with the security she felt held within those strong arms, but would wake up to Kara already gone doing an early morning sweep before work. She was being unfair and selfish, she was sure. But damn it, Lena didn't want to share Kara with the entire city. She wanted to be put first again, when it came to Kara, except perhaps Alex. She wasn't going to just be a forgotten girlfriend waiting at home for just a scrap of attention. I'm Lena goddamned Luthor for fucks sake! I am a desirable and sexy woman and I will not be taken for granted!

"Maybe I should go to the club and pick up someone. It'd serve her bloody right," Lena muttered under her breath as she poured herself a generous goblet of scotch. She took a resolute sip and relished the burn at the back of her throat, but she didn't move from her seat behind her desk. Because no matter how frustrated she was, her heart was still firmly in Kara's corner.