CHAPTER 6

My cell phone began to buzz furiously, startling me from the trance that reading through several pages of a report about a suspected elder abuse case had put me in. I closed my laptop and picked up the phone, fully expecting to hear my husband's voice. He usually called at least once a day when he was on shift to check on me and Finn.

"What's up, handsome?" I asked, smiling. I didn't bother looking at the caller ID. I heard a loud crackling sound amid the occasional squawks of sirens in the background. It wasn't like him to call from a fire scene. He usually waited until he and the crew were back at House 51 before calling.

"Maddy, this is Wallace Boden," he said in his deep, booming voice. I was suddenly filled with a sense of dread, the smile slowly fading from my face The Chief never called me unless there was something wrong. I began to panic.

" Oh my God, is Matthew alright, Chief?! What happened?" I said in a shaky emotional voice.

"Maddy...listen to me carefully. Matt was injured in a fire over here on Warehouse Row. He fell through a stairwell and landed hard on his back. He's on his way to Lakeshore in Ambo 61. He's unconscious, so we can't be sure of just how badly he's hurt. I wanted to tell you so you could get to the hospital as soon as possible."

I don't even remember ending the call. My heart was racing a mile a minute as I scrambled around the house gathering my keys and purse. I slung my bag over one shoulder and the diaper bag over the other before carefully lifting Finn out of the playpen. I had put him in there so I could get some computer work done and he had fallen asleep while quietly playing with his blocks. I tried to buckle him into the car seat without waking him, otherwise he'd be a squalling, cranky little bugger by the time we got to the hospital. Thankfully, he fell back to sleep as soon as we pulled away from the house.

The forty minute ride to Lakeshore seemed to take forever. I drove as fast as I could for someone with a sleeping toddler in the car who was anticipating seeing her injured and unconscious firefighter husband in the emergency room. I turned into the ER parking lot on two squealing wheels, pulled in to the nearest parking spot and slammed the car into park with a jolt. Luckily, Finn remained asleep as I unbuckled him and lifted him out of the car seat. I walked as quickly as I could into the ER entrance, searching for a familiar face behind the admission desk, when my eyes locked on Marion Edwards, a Registered Nurse, who I knew well. She had worked at the hospital for close to twenty years, having spent the last few years as the Admission Coordinator for the ER. She was a crackerjack, no nonsense nurse who knew her stuff. Many times I had told her that she should have gone back to school to be a PA, but she would laugh and scoff it off, saying she was too old.

"Marion! Thank God! Ambo 61 is bringing Matt in from a fire scene. Have they arrived yet?"

"Yeah, honey. He's in Triage 3. They're still assessing him for injuries. You can see him in a few minutes. Come with me. You can sit in the staff lounge until they're ready," she said. I followed her through the narrow hallway behind the admissions desk and into the staff lounge. I dropped my purse and the diaper bag on the floor and sat down on the grey plastic couch, with Finn on my lap.

"You rest here and I'll come and get you when you're able to see him. Is there anything I can get for you or this adorable little guy?" she asked, gently grasping Finn's cheek between her thumb and forefinger.

"I could use a shot of tequila, but I'll settle for ice water. Apple juice for him, if you have it.'

"Sure thing, honey. I'll be right back." Finn was still sound asleep with his head against my shoulder when she returned a few minutes later. She handed me a plastic tumbler filled with ice water, then dug through the diaper bag looking for Finn's sippy cup.

"My God, Maddy...where has the time gone? He's gotten so big since the last time I saw him! How old is he now?" she asked as she poured the apple juice into his cup.

"He'll be two in August," I replied. I tried to keep my mind focused on the idle conversation between us instead of the image of Matt laid out on a hospital stretcher, all bloodied and broken, but it wasn't working. "Is there any report on Matt yet? Jesus, I hate not knowing what's going on," I said, sounding impatient.

"Let me go check," she said, patting me on the knee. Ten minutes later, she returned and motioned to me to go with her. Still holding on to Finn, I followed her down the hall, stopping in front of Triage 3. The door to the room was closed and the blinds were drawn on the only window. I could feel my heart pounding in my throat.

"You can go in now, honey, but let me take him before you do," she said, taking Finn from my arms. I cautiously pushed the door open and stepped inside. I was greeted by the sight of Matthew on a gurney, surrounded by four people, two on either side of him, all of whom were checking the monitors that he had been hooked up to. He had been stripped of his turnout gear and his white Captain's shirt, wearing only his blue pants and socks. IV's had been inserted in both of his arms and electrodes had been placed on his bare chest. I wiped away the few tears that had fallen down my face.

"Don't cry, baby," said Matt, in a weakened voice. I looked up at his face to see his eyes were open and looking directly at me. I rushed up to the head of the bed, pushing a woman with a clipboard out of my way.

"Oh Christ, Matthew," I said, picking up his hand in mine, unable to stop the cascade of tears from falling. His face was covered in soot and grime and blood was trickling out from his left nostril. He looked pale and sweaty and was struggling to breathe.

"Are you Mrs. Casey?" asked a tall, thin man with thinning white hair and a white goatee.

"Yes, I am. And you are?"

"I'm Dr. Evan Richards. I'm the attending physician in charge of your husband's case."

"Do you know how bad his injuries are yet?" I asked, wiping away the steady stream of tears that I couldn't stop.

"Well, the good news is that he regained consciousness shortly after arriving at the ER. The bad news is that he's got a couple of cracked ribs and a sprained shoulder. Your husband is very lucky, Mrs. Casey. He took one hell of a fall and things could have been a lot worse. Right now, his worst complaint is the pain. I've ordered a narcotic to help with that."

"Is he able to go home?"

"Overall, your husband is in good physical shape, but even so, I'd like to keep him overnight to get his pain under control and to monitor his vitals." I nodded my head to let him know I understood what he had said, but could not speak as I tried to choke back a few sobs that were determined to escape. I turned my attention back to Matt, who was grimacing with obvious pain.

"Is that morphine on it's way, Doc? It hurts like a bitch," said Matt.

"The nurse is administering it into your IV right now, Matt. You should feel the effects in a few minutes."

Just then, we could hear wailing from the hallway just outside the room. I could tell that primal scream from a mile away.

"Is that Finn?" asked Matt, with a slight smirk on his face.

"The one and only. Marion Edwards took him so I could come in to see you," I said.

"Hey, Doc...is there any reason why my little guy can't come in? I'd like to see him before the morphine knocks me out," asked Matt. The doctor opened up the door and motioned for Marion to bring Finn inside. As soon as he saw Matt, he started chanting "Da Da" over and over. I took him from Marion's arms and held him so he could give Matt a kiss on the cheek.

"Hey, little man! Daddy's got a boo boo, but I'm gonna be okay," said Matt.

"Da da boo boo?" said Finn, in his tiny little inquisitive voice as he reached his arms out to Matt, who took his little hands in his. Matt was in too much pain to hold a squirming, cranky toddler.

"Maddy, why don't you take him home. He's only going to get more antsy the longer he's here. I'll be fine for tonight. There's no reason for you to hang around," said Matt. His eyelids were getting heavy as the morphine began to take effect.

"OK, Captain...only if you're sure," I said. He nodded his head slowly. He cradled the side of my head as I leaned down to give him a kiss goodbye.

"I'm sure, baby. When I first fell, I was scared as hell and my life flashed in front of me like an abbreviated home movie, but now that I know I'm gonna be okay, I can rest easier. I'll see you tomorrow," he said, before nodding off in a narcotic induced sleep. I gathered up my purse and the diaper bag from the floor, shifted Finn to my left hip and left the exam room. I thanked Marion for her help with the baby before leaving the ER. I buckled Finn into his car seat, then slid into the driver's seat and buckled myself in. I stared blankly through the windshield, not really looking at anything, when a huge wave of all consuming guilt washed over me and I began to sob. Just a few days earlier, I had been angry at Matthew for forbidding me to talk to Jackson. In light of Matthew's injuries, it all seemed so trivial now. I still felt strongly about seeing Jackson, but it would have to wait for a while. Matt's recovery was the only thing that mattered right now. Everything else would have to wait.