CHAPTER 9
Jackson leaned his head against the door frame and watched her walk down the hall. It tore his heart in two to watch her leave. He had spent every waking minute of the last fifteen years thinking about nothing but her and their baby girl. They were his whole life. It had taken him such a long time to make his way back to her, but every misstep, every bit of pain he endured had been worth it. Coming back home and learning that she was gone tore him up inside. Part of him wished that he had been left in the desert to die, but seeing her today made him glad that he was alive. His love for her never died. Those Iraqi bastards may have broken his body and taken his leg, but they could never take away the image of her face that held steadfast in his mind. He watched as she turned the corner at the end of the hallway, then disappeared out of his sight. It was only then that he went back inside the suite and closed the door.
He remembered their last conversation like it was yesterday. He could still hear her voice in his ear, crying happy tears at the news that he was coming back home for good. This tour of duty would be his last one. He had planned to leave the reserves and be home with her long before their baby was born. All he ever wanted out of life was to find his soulmate, settle down, start a family and live out the rest of their days at Rocking Horse Ranch. It had been his only dream since he was a young boy growing up in Texas. Seeing her now brought all those memories to the forefront of his mind, but fate always seemed to have a way of screwing things up for him.
He was afraid now that she may not come back to see him. He had rattled her by kissing her, but he couldn't help himself. He hadn't touched her like that in fifteen years. Even the knowledge that she was married to someone else didn't stop him. He had ached for her every day he was away from her and that kiss had only partially satisfied him. The moment his lips touched hers, he felt as if he would catch fire. He felt no guilt for wanting to pick her up and carry her into the bedroom to make love to her. He hadn't been with anyone else since he met her all those years ago in Cancun. She was his one true love, the greatest love he had ever known, but she belonged to Matthew Casey now. That's a name that would haunt him for the rest of his life, he was sure of that.
It had been a long time since he held her, but he was certain he felt her respond to him. When his lips first touched hers, her body stiffened and she hesitated, not knowing what to do, caught between being Mrs. Casey and having been Mrs. Walker at one time. But when the memory of them kissing at their wedding popped into her head, he felt her press her body in closer to his, clutch at his shoulders and kiss him back almost just as hard.
"There's still something there, Cookie. I know it," he said aloud, before downing a jigger of Jack Daniels. The liquor emboldened him into feeling that he could win her back for good.
Matthew Casey wouldn't know what hit him. It would be his punishment for abandoning her while she was in college. Jackson didn't give a damn about any explanation this Matthew Casey had given her. He had been the one to show her what true love was, not Casey. He had been the one to give her the life she deserved, while Casey was nowhere to be found. Madeleine would understand all of that. She had to. Jackson thought back to how intensely Madeleine had loved him. She told him time and time again that he had brought her back to life and had shown her what love was supposed to be like. She belonged with him, not Casey. She completed his life. Without her, he was an empty shell of a man in spite of his intimidating size. The war in Iraq had damaged him physically beyond repair, but it was nothing compared to the emotional damage from learning that Madeleine had moved on without him and was married to someone else. Losing her had been far more painful than losing his leg. He needed her in his life and he was going to have her at any cost.
Since his father died and his mother had slipped into the early stages of dementia, the Walker name didn't hold as much weight as it once did. Jackson was determined to change that. Preston Jr. had done his best to keep the family business afloat, but it was too much for one man to handle, especially for one that had no balls. His younger brother Kent had been no help to him, which left Jackson to clean up the mess. Since he came back to Texas, he had successfully taken care of Walker & Sons, placated the Board of Directors and had taken care of his mother's medical needs. Once he had Madeleine back in his life, all the pieces of the puzzle would be in their proper place.
He wished he had asked her more about her father, but their conversation had taken an unexpected turn thanks mainly to his crossing the boundaries that he should have respected. He had loved both Jim and Gwen when he and Madeleine were married. Her father was an affable enough man who loved his daughter and wanted to see her happy. Her mother was a different story. Madeleine had told him years ago that her mother was cold and distant and she was right. He never warmed to her like he did with her father. She was always making things difficult and never had a word of praise for Madeleine. To make things worse, he found out from Preston Jr that her mother had accepted a large sum of money from their own mother, presumably used as hush money for giving up all rights to their granddaughter. His mother's mind was too far gone to ask her and now that Gwen was dead, he had no one to question.
The only situation he couldn't make right was Harper. The only parents she knew were Junior and Audra and they had done a good job of raising her. Madeleine had been duped into believing that their little girl had died at birth. She hadn't been given the chance to be a mother. Their parents had seen to that, claiming that Madeleine was in no state of mind to take care of a baby, especially after she had attempted suicide. Jackson knew deep down in his heart that having Harper to take care of would have been exactly what she'd needed to fill the void that his reported death had left.
If only he could have gotten home to them sooner, he would have put a stop to his family's interference and their lives would have been completely different now. He wouldn't have allowed anyone to take his family away from him. Now that he was home, he made a vow that he would take back the one thing that belonged to him and that was Madeleine.
"Matthew Casey, you'd better prepare yourself for war," said Jackson, swallowing down another shot of whiskey.