Uuh... long time, no see. I'm sorry. So very sorry. Please accept Leo's humor, sarcasm, and fan boyish ways as an apology to make up for it.

Thanks you for all the reviews. Sorry I took so long.

I give credit to Rick Riordan for some of the wording in this chapter (aka some dialogue and descriptions)

Disclaimer: I own nothing

On the road, the four of them had plenty of time to talk. Percy told Annabeth, Leo and Grover about his latest dream, and Leo whistled.

"That's a doozy," he muttered.

"Tell me about it," Percy agreed. "The person called the voice in the pit something other than my lord. A special title, but I can't remember it."

"The Silent One?" Annabeth suggested. "The Rich One? Both of those are nicknames for Hades."

"Maybe ..." Percy said, although he didn't sound convinced.

"That throne room sounds like Hades's," Grover said. "That's the way it's usually described."

Percy shook his head. "Something's wrong. The throne room wasn't the main part of the dream. And that voice from the pit ... I don't know. It just didn't feel like a god's voice."

Annabeth's eyes widened.

"What?" Percy asked.

"Oh ... nothing. I was just-No, it has to be Hades. Maybe he sent this thief, this invisible person, to get the master bolt, and something went wrong-"

"Like what?"

"I-I don't know," she said. "But if he stole Zeus's symbol of power from Olympus, and the gods were hunting him, I mean, a lot of things could go wrong. So this thief had to hide the bolt, or he lost it somehow. Anyway, he failed to bring it to Hades. That's what the voice said in your dream, right? The guy failed. That would explain what the Furies were searching for when they came after us on the bus. Maybe they thought we had retrieved the bolt."

Percy wondered what was wrong with her. She looked pale.

"She thinks it might be something worse than Hades," Leo whispered to Percy, as though reading his mind.

"Like who?" Percy muttered back.

"I'll tell you later. They're freaked out enough; we can't afford to distract ourselves," Leo hissed. "Besides, the last thing we need is to send Annabeth into a panic attack."

Percy wondered what that meant, but he didn't push it. Yet.

"But if I'd already retrieved the bolt," Percy said, "why would I be traveling to the Underworld?"

"To threaten Hades," Grover suggested. "To bribe or blackmail him into getting your mom back."

Leo whistled. "You have evil thoughts for a goat."

Maybe I should introduce him to Coach Hedge, Leo thought.

"Why, thank you."

"But the thing in the pit said it was waiting for two items," Percy said. "If the master bolt is one, what's the other?"

"The helm," Leo replied. "This thing wants as many objects of power as possible. I mean, if you were plotting to start World War III or take over the world or whatever, wouldn't you want to have the upper hand? He wants the Master bolt and Hades's helm. I'm surprised he didn't go after your father's trident, too."

"So what's our game plan?" Percy asked.

"We trade the helm for your mother," Leo answered. "And then, we get information. Why would Hades's have his own helm stolen?"

No one had an answer.

"Exactly. He wouldn't. What if this isn't Hades's?"

"Who else would it be?" Percy asked.

Leo pursed his lips, exchanging a look with Annabeth.

"One thing at a time," he settled on.

Wasteland rolled by. They passed a sign that said CALIFORNIA STATE LINE, 12 MILES.

"Either way, the answer is in the Underworld," Annabeth assured them. "You saw spirits of the dead, Percy. There's only one place that could be. We're doing the right thing."

She tried to boost the atmosphere by suggesting clever strategies for getting into the Land of the Dead, but that only made Leo feel worse. After all, it was the land of the dead. Leo had only been there once, and it was not fun (long story). It wasn't as bad as the House of Hades, though.

The cab sped west. Every gust of wind through Death Valley sounded like a spirit of the dead. Every time, the brakes hissed on an eighteen-wheeler, it reminded Leo of Echidna's reptilian voice.

At sunset, the taxi dropped the demigods at the beach in Santa Monica. Honestly, Leo thought San Francisco looked nicer, but this place looked nice, too, although it didn't smell too great. There were carnival rides lining the Pier, palm trees lining the sidewalks, homeless guys sleeping in the sand dunes, and surfer dudes waiting for the perfect wave.

Grover, Annabeth, Percy and Leo walked down to the edge of the surf.

"What now?" Annabeth asked.

Percy stepped into the surf.

Leo raised an eyebrow. He didn't remember this story, but he did remember something about pearls.

"Percy?" Annabeth said. "What are you doing?"

Percy kept walking, up to his waist, then his chest.

She called after Percy, "You know how polluted that water is? There're all kinds of toxic-"

That's when his head went under.

Annabeth began to head for the water, Grover following, but Leo put out an arm to stop them.

"Let him go," he said. "Percy knows what he's doing."

"For once," Annabeth grumbled, but she stepped back.

Several minutes passed before Percy appeared out of the sea, his clothes dry and something clenched in his hand.

As soon as he climbed onto the sand, he told them the story of what occurred beneath the waves and showed them the pearls.

Annabeth grimaced. "No gift comes without a price."

That reminded Leo oddly of what Nemesis told him when she warned him about opening the fortune cookie.

He shivered. Bad memory.

"They were free."

Leo snorted. "That's not what she means. She's not referring to money."

Annabeth nodded. "'There is no such thing as a free lunch.' That's an ancient Greek saying that translated pretty well into American. There will be a price. You wait."

On that wonderful thought, they turned their backs on the sea and headed up the beach.

With some spare change from Ares's backpack (Leo glared at it when the others weren't looking), they took the bus into West Hollywood.

Of course, the driver had never heard of DOA Recording Studios. Leo should've expected that.

"You two remind me of some people I saw on TV," he told Percy and Leo. "You guys child actors or something?"

"Uh ... we're stunt doubles... for a lot of child actors," Percy lied.

"Trained in free running and parkour," Leo agreed. At least he was.

"Oh! That explains it."

They thanked him and got off quickly at the next stop.

Leo had almost forgotten what that was like, people recognizing you from the news. By the Wilderness School, he was pretty close to looking legal, so the news focused on kidnapped kids and nine year old runaways. A fifteen year old runaway was three years away from being an adult... or maybe social services just didn't want to deal with him anymore.

They wandered for miles on foot, looking for DOA. Leo didn't know the way because Nico had shadow traveled them to the building. Leo had never walked there before, and he'd never lived in California, so he couldn't be much help.

Twice, they ducked into alleys to avoid cop cars.

Percy froze so suddenly, Leo took a few steps before realizing that Percy wasn't beside him.

Leo back tracked and found Percy standing in front of an appliance store window where a television displayed an ugly, fat man playing poker at a table. Three guys sat around the table, and a young blonde woman was sitting beside him, patting his hand. A TV news anchor was interviewing him.

A tear glistened on his cheek (although Leo suspected it was fake. This man reminded him of Teresa-although he was much uglier- because they both had the same look in their eyes- a look that told Leo they were hiding something, but they were good at hiding it, and that made it worse). He was saying, "Honest, Ms. Walters, if it wasn't for Sugar here, my grief counselor, I'd be a wreck. My stepson took everything I cared about. My wife ... my Camaro ... I-I'm sorry. I have trouble talking about it."

"There you have it, America." The news anchor turned to the camera. "A man torn apart. An adolescent boy with serious issues. Let me show you, again, the last known photo of this troubled young fugitive, taken a week ago in Denver."

The screen cut to a grainy shot of Percy, Leo, Annabeth, and Grover standing outside the Colorado diner, talking to Ares.

"Who are the other children in this photo?" The woman asked dramatically. "Who is the man with them? Is Percy Jackson a delinquent, a terrorist, or perhaps the brainwashed victim of a frightening new cult? When we come back, we chat with a leading child psychologist. Stay tuned, America."

Leo snorted. "The things they come up with. First of all, you are a delinquent, just not a violent one, and a terrorist? Please. The cult theory, though... that's promising."

Percy rolled his eyes. "Thanks."

"C'mon," Grover told them before hauling them away.

It got dark, and dangerous-looking characters started coming out on the streets to play. Leo was a runaway and had met some interesting people, to say the least, but LA was... let's just say, Leo wouldn't want to live there.

They walked past gang members, homeless people, other runaways (Leo even recognized a few that he'd seen in other states, and he made sure to keep his head down). Some of them looked at the demigods like they were trying to figure if they were worth the trouble of mugging.

As they hurried past the entrance of an alley, a voice from the darkness said, "Hey, you."

Leo was ready to break into a run (getting called out on the streets of a dangerous area is never good), but Percy, class A idiot at times, decided to stop.

Before Leo knew it, they were surrounded. A gang of kids had circled them. Six of them in all-white kids with expensive clothes and mean faces.

"Okay, let's all calm down," Leo said.

"No such luck, Valdez," one of them said.

Leo blinked. "How did you..."

Another rolled their eyes. "Dustin here used to be apart of Blake's gang," he said, stabbing a thumb at a kid decked out in all dark clothes. (This is explained in the authors note at the bottom)

Leo sighed. "Of course," he muttered, sarcastically.

The kids started coming closer.

Percy must've panicked because he uncapped his sword/pen/thing (Leo used to call it that just to tick... well, future Percy off).

When the sword appeared out of nowhere, the kids backed off, but their leader was either really stupid or really brave, because he kept coming at them with a switchblade.

Percy swung the sword.

"Percy!" Leo yelled.

The kid yelped. But he must've been one hundred percent mortal, because the blade passed through his chest, harmlessly.

He looked down. "What the ..."

"Run!" Percy yelled.

They pushed two kids out of the way and raced down the street, not knowing where they were going. The demigods turned a sharp corner.

"There!" Annabeth shouted.

Only one store on the block looked open, its windows glaring with neon. The sign above the door said something like CRTYSUS WARTE BDE ALPECA. (I'm not sure if Leo has dyslexia, so I'm just assuming)

"Crusty's Water Bed Palace?" Grover translated.

Leo shrugged. It was better than nothing.

Oh, man, was he wrong.

They burst through the doors, ran behind a water bed, and ducked. A split second later, the gang kids ran past outside.

"I think we lost them," Grover panted.

A voice behind them boomed, "Lost who?"

The demigods all jumped.

Standing behind them was a guy who looked like a raptor in a leisure suit. He was at least seven feet tall, with absolutely no hair. He had gray, leathery skin, thick-lidded eyes, and a cold, reptilian smile. He moved toward the kids slowly, but Leo got the feeling he could move fast if he needed to.

Leo mentally cursed. Bad feeling about this guy. He tugged on Percy's shoulder, but Percy was still blinking owlishly at the man.

"I'm Crusty," he said, with a tartar-yellow smile.

Yeah, Leo thought. You definitely are. He probably would've said it, but he had a bad feeling, and if this guy was a monster, no use adding fuel to the fire.

"Sorry to barge in," Percy told him. "We were just, um, browsing."

Leo inwardly groaned. Why didn't we just run? If this guy is only a sales man, we're screwed. If this guy is a monster, we're really screwed.

"You mean hiding from those no-good kids," he grumbled. "They hang around every night. I get a lot of people in here, thanks to them. Say, you want to look at a water bed?"

"No, thanks," Leo practically yelped, but he had already put a huge paw on Percy's shoulder and steered him deeper into the showroom. Leo, Grover, and Annabeth had no choice but to follow.

There was every kind of water bed you could imagine: different kinds of wood, different patterns of sheets; queen-size, king-size, emperor-of-the-universe-size.

"This is my most popular model." Crusty spread his hands proudly over a bed covered with black satin sheets, with built-in Lava Lamps on the headboard. The mattress vibrated, which reminded Leo of the time he put an invention in his foster sibling's mattress and rigged it to vibrate in the middle of the night to make him think there was an earthquake.

Leo mentally laughed. Good times.

...Priorities, Leo. Focus.

With his ADHD, that was easier said than done.

"Million-hand massage," Crusty told them. "Go on, try it out. Shoot, take a nap. I don't care. No business today, anyway."

"Um," Percy said, "I don't think ..."

"Million-hand massage!" Grover cried, and dove in. "Oh, you guys! This is cool."

"Grover," Leo hissed. "Priorities."

"Come on, Leo. We can spare three minutes," Grover pointed out before relaxing on the bed.

Leo rolled his eyes. Here we go. This is first-quest-Leo-Valdez right here, he thought, mentally pointing at Grover.

"Hmm," Crusty said, stroking his leathery chin. "Almost, almost."

"Almost what?" Leo asked. There was something off about the way he said that...

He looked at Annabeth. "Do me a favor and try this one over here, honey. Might fit."

Annabeth said, "But what-"

He patted her reassuringly on the shoulder and led her over to the Safari Deluxe model with teakwood lions carved into the frame and a leopard-patterned comforter. When Annabeth didn't want to lie down, Crusty pushed her.

"And you?" He gestured to Leo.

"No, thanks," Leo squeaked.

Crusty grabbed Leo's wrist and dragged him over to a model with Lava Lamps on the bed posts and fire red sheets.

Fitting, Leo admitted.

Leo tried to back away, but Crusty pushed him onto the bed.

"That was not cool!" Leo exclaimed. "Guys, come on. We have places to be."

"Hey!" Annabeth protested as her and Leo went to stand.

Crusty snapped his fingers. "Ergo!"

Ropes sprang from the sides of the bed, lashing around Annabeth, holding her to the mattress.

Grover tried to get up, but ropes sprang from his black-satin bed, too, and lashed him down.

Leo was quick, but even he couldn't escape the ropes, which lashed at him and tied him down at the speed of light.

"N-not c-c-cool!" Grover yelled, his voice vibrating from the million-hand massage. "N-not c-cool a-at all!"

"Look, Voldemort," Leo snapped (that's who he reminded him of. They were both pale and had very creative ways to torture people. The difference was this guy had yellow teeth and a nose). "You better let us go, or this shop burns to the ground."

Crusty tutted. "You, young man, are much too short. "

Leo rolled his eyes. "I know! How is that relevant?"

The giant looked at Leo before Annabeth and then he turned toward Percy and grinned. "Almost, darn it."

Percy tried to step away, but his hand shot out and clamped around the back of his neck. "Whoa, kid. Don't worry. We'll find you one in a sec."

"Let my friends go."

"Oh, sure I will. But I got to make them fit, first."

"What do you mean?"

"All the beds are exactly six feet, see? Your friends are too short. Got to make them fit."

"Dude, I am only 5'2!" Leo shouted. "You are not stretching me ten inches!"

Leo, Annabeth, and Grover began to struggle harder.

"Can't stand imperfect measurements," Crusty muttered. "Ergo!"

A new set of ropes leaped out from the top and bottom of the beds, wrapping around their ankles and then around their armpits. The ropes started tight-ening, pulling the three of them from both ends.

It didn't hurt much at first, but after a few moments, the ropes started really tugging at Leo's spine, and he cried out in pain.

"Don't worry," Crusty told Percy, "These are stretching jobs. Maybe three extra inches on their spines. They might even live. Now why don't we find a bed you like, huh?"

"Percy!" Grover yelled.

"Your real name's not Crusty, is it?" Percy asked.

Not the time for questions! Leo managed to think through his pain clouded mind.

"Legally, it's Procrustes," he admitted.

"The Stretcher," Percy said.

We hot that, Leo thought as he shuffled around on the bed, pain erupting in his back.

"Yeah," the salesman said. "But who can pronounce Procrustes? Bad for business. Now 'Crusty,' anybody can say that."

"You're right. It's got a good ring to it."

God plan, Percy, Leo thought, but work faster.

His eyes lit up. "You think so?"

"Oh, absolutely," Percy said. "And the workmanship on these beds? Fabulous!"

He grinned hugely, but his fingers remained on Percy's neck.. "I tell my customers that. Every time. Nobody bothers to look at the workmanship. How many built-in Lava Lamp headboards have you seen?"

"Not too many."

"That's right!"

"Percy!" Annabeth yelled. "What are you doing?"

"Don't mind her," Percy told Procrustes. "She's impossible."

The giant laughed. "All my customers are. Never six feet exactly. So inconsiderate. And then they complain about the fitting."

"What do you do if they're longer than six feet?"

"Oh, that happens all the time. It's a simple fix."

He let go of Percy's neck, and he reached behind a nearby sales desk and brought out a huge double-bladed brass axe. He said, "I just center the subject as best I can and lop off whatever hangs over on either end."

"Ah," Percy said, eyes wide and voice higher than usual. "Sensible."

"I'm so glad to come across an intelligent customer!"

The ropes were really stretching Leo now. Leo had never been burned, but he imagined that it felt like this. His hands were unconsciously heating up, and if everyone wasn't so distracted, they probably would've noticed his hair smoking.

Meanwhile, Annabeth was turning pale, and Grover made gurgling sounds, like a strangled goose.

Work faster, Leo mentally begged, but when he opened his mouth, only chokes gasps escaped.

"So, Crusty ..." Percy said, keeping his voice light. He glanced at the sales tag on the valentine-shaped Honeymoon Special. "Does this one really have dynamic stabilizers to stop wave motion?"

"Absolutely. Try it out."

"Yeah, maybe I will. But would it work even for a big guy like you? No waves at all?"

"Guaranteed."

"No way."

"Way."

"Show me."

He sat down eagerly on the bed, patted the mattress. "No waves. See?"

Percy snapped his fingers. "Ergo."

Ropes lashed around Crusty and flattened him against the mattress.

"Hey!" he yelled.

Come on, Perce, Leo thought as his spine popped in numerous place. Much more strain, and Leo's spinal cord might just snap.

"Center him just right," Percy said.

Could you release us first? Leo thought, but his words became coughs on the way to his lips.

The ropes readjusted themselves at Percy's command. Crusty's whole head stuck out the top. His feet stuck out the bottom.

"No!" he said. "Wait! This is just a demo."

Percy uncapped Riptide. "A few simple adjustments ..."

"You drive a hard bargain," Crusty told Percy. "I'll give you thirty percent off on selected floor models.'"

"I think I'll start with the top." Percy raised his sword.

Stop mocking him, and hurry up! Leo tried to yell, but he flopped back on the mattress as the ropes tugged harder. His words were lost somewhere in his mind, which was foggy with pain.

"No money down! No interest for six months!"

Percy swung the sword. Crusty stopped making offers.

Percy cut the ropes on the other beds. Annabeth and Grover got to their feet, groaning and wincing and cursing Percy a lot. Leo gladly joined them.

"You look taller," Percy said.

"Yeah," Leo gasped, sarcastically. "That makes up for the torture session."

"I know, right?" Grover agreed, even more sarcastically than Leo (challenge accepted, Leo thought).

"Very funny," Annabeth said to Percy. "Be faster next time."

Leo nodded. "Although I hope there isn't a next time."

Percy looked at the bulletin board behind Crusty's sales desk.

"Come on," Percy told his friends when he found the address of DOA Recording Studios.

"Give us a minute," Grover complained. "We were almost stretched to death.'"

"Then you're ready for the Underworld," Percy said. "It's only a block from here."

Once again, sorry I was gone for so long. Hope you enjoyed the chapter.

Also, if you suggested a character in trivia, and your character has not shown up yet, message me. I'm a forgetful person. I know that Dakota has been suggested. Anyone else that has gotten trivia and suggested a character, message me. Thanks

Trivia:

What is Leo's full first name?