Unwanted Guests
ᵖᵃʳᵗ ¹ ⁱ ᵏⁿᵒʷ ᵖˡᵉᵃˢᵉ ᵈᵒⁿ'ᵗ ʰᵘʳᵗ ᵐᵉ
"Kazuma..."
"Yes, I'm Kazuma."
"You still haven't given me a rating for that Explosion yet."
"..." Kazuma pouts as he carries Megumin down the same path they take to practice her explosions back to Axel. As the self-proclaimed connoisseur of Explosion magic, he often would give out his analytical feedback to help the young Archwizard improve. While her average score exceeds 90 out of 100, today however...
"...79" he mutters.
"Huh?"
"79."
"EHHHHH?!" Megumin cries, "That low!?"
"-and a half!"
"What difference does that make!? What was wrong with it!?"
"Hey, keep still!" Kazuma shifts his grip to keep the bewildered girl from falling off of his back.
"It's just..." he gulps, "The impact felt distant like hearing a boulder falling from a mountain. I felt a slight breeze but it's barely distinguishable from a windy day. The center of the crater looked like it would definitely kill anything caught dead in the middle of it, but it probably wouldn't do such much AOE-wise."
Each words were like arrows striking upon the poor girl.
"H-have mercy..."
"79 isn't so bad, that's still passing-"
"PASSING IS NOT ACCEPTABLE TO THE STANDARDS OF A CRIMSON DEMON!"
"Hey not so loud! I'm right here you know!" Kazuma leans his head forward as possible to keep his ear drums from rupturing, "Look, everyone has a bad day-"
"Impossible, members of the Crimson Demon clan are perfect."
"That's debatable."
Megumin's eyes flares up, "Was that mockery directed at me or my clan?"
Not wanting to end the day with two explosions, Kazuma bit his tongue and replies, "Nothing, forget I said anything."
"Hmph, I won't just let this insult slide because you backed down, coward."
"Who are you calling a coward!?" Kazuma retorts, "If I was to mock you and your clan, I would say that one of the many things you two relate with is a lack of development!"
"You! Take this!" Megumin grabs her staff with both ends as she pulls it against Kazuma's neck.
"GAH! L-let go you c-crazy!"
"Apologize! Now!"
"I c-can't-!"
Kazuma starts shaking violently to throw off the tempered mage from his back to no avail.
"H-hey! Careful where you're moving to! There's a steep slope near us!"
"T-then I... taking y-you with me!" Kazuma chokes as he dives back off into the slope beneath them.
~/~
"Ah, welcome!" announces Wiz as the shop's doorbell ringed. She emerges out from the back while rubbing eyes to greet the customers.
"How can I-AH! Kazuma! Megumin! Are you two okay!?"
"Hoi" the pair answered, both covered in dirt, scratches, and a few bruises here and there.
"W-what happened-"
"Giant toads."
"A-ah, I see..." Though while Wiz notices how the two of them are not covered in toad slime with their usual encounters, she felt that it was probably the better to not press for details.
"So... what brings you both here?"
"We need some healing potions and salves if you have any," Kazuma answers.
"Oh my! Is your, uh, friend hurt?" Wiz looks around to see if a certain Archpriestess is lying in wait for her to drop her guard.
"We're not... trying to be too reliant on her..."
Even though Kazuma isn't part of Megumin's clan, both their eyes appear to be glow menacingly before Wiz at the mention of the goddess.
What a... terrifying pair...
"Kazuma, I'm going to use the bathroom." Megumin said as she leaves him before he could answer.
"I-...okay..."
"Are the..." Wiz fidgets wondering if she should inquire while looking for her potions, "Are the two of you... fighting?"
"Eh!? Is it that obvious?" he stammers.
"I-I don't mean to invade! And don't worry! C-couples fight all the time, it's normal! Or so I'm told..."
"W-we're not-!" Kazuma flusters and turns his head away from her. The hell did that come from!? I would expect such a loaded jab from Vanir not this-
"H-hey, where is Vanir?" Kazuma asks in his attempt to change the subject.
"Oh, today's our inventory day! He's in the back right now taking records of our stock, which is why our store might seem to be a little disarray right now. So it's best that he shouldn't be bothered right now."
Kazuma looks around the room and discovers all the assortments scattered throughout the area. Clearly Wiz's handiwork with how cluttered and disorienting it looks with all the objects and boxes piling up.
There was one product in the room however that caught Kazuma's eye.
"What is that right there?"
Wiz turns to see where he's pointing, "Oh! This was originally kept so far in the back I nearly forgot I had it."
The product is a black box layered with what appears to be tape with symbols written on them. It appears to be one of those half slotted containers as he can see the seams at the bottom taped up with the symbols.
"Heh, it almost look like a parcel package from hell," Kazuma chuckled.
"Well, it's not technically from hell but it is a cursed relic created by demons."
"... hah?"
"Is... something wrong?" Wiz questioned.
Oh, right. I forgot this place carries dangerous objects ever since Vanir and I struck up a business in selling products from Japan. Like that damn collar...
"What's in it?"
"It's a... peculiar curse..." Wiz's cheeks started to become noticeably red, "It's said to influence... emotions to people in the same room..."
"Like what."
"A-ah!? You know... the... intimacy kind...?"
"I'll take it."
"Huh!?" Wiz startled by Kazuma's quick offer. "But why would you-ah, I-I s-see... but we haven't even made a-mmph"
Her sentence was cut short as Kazuma confidantly silences her lips with a finger.
"Money isn't an issue, but don't underestimate my mercantilism." Kazuma walks over to the box and pulls out a dagger.
"W-wait Kazuma! What are you doing?"
"If this object can stir up hidden emotions, then I would like to see it for myself." smiling widely he slides the dagger in between the seams ready to cut the seals off.
"Kazuma."
"Ah! M-Megumin!" Kazuma quickly hides the blade into the back of his pants as he turns to the Archwizard returning from the facilities.
"Can we get something to eat on the way back?"
"Of course! Of course! Anything you want! Hahahaha!"
Megumin raises an eyebrow at him but before she could speak her face was immediately met with a bundle of vials before her.
"Here are the potions you want!" Wiz coming in with the assist.
"O-oh, thank you..." Megumin takes the bundle from her, "I'll wait for you outside, but let's get going ok?"
"Yeah, just a sec while I pay her!" Kazuma waves before turning to the lich. "Thanks for the save..."
"I rather keep my store in one piece... you shouldn't be so lenient like that around her." she scowls.
"B-but we're not... yeah, you're right..." Kazuma's heart suddenly being speared by a mix emotions of excitement, guilt, and fear. "But... could you deliver that object to our mansion?"
"S-still? I suppose I could but-"
"Kazuma!"
"Here's what I have on hand! If it's not enough you can ask for more when you drop it off!" And with that, Kazuma rushes out after dropping a hefty sack of coins on her desk.
~/~
"I can't believe someone as stingy as you would just lose that much money and not realize that til now."
Kazuma kept quiet as he broke the news to the hungry, now irritated mage that he lost the money in order to keep his purchase a secret. But in a spur of the moment, he forgot to have some left to order food.
That object could help settle our emotions without getting on each other's nerves. And m-maybe...
"What were you doing with Wiz while I was waiting then? Where you flirting with her behind my back?"
"What!? Of course not! I just told her to deduct it from my next payment from Vanir..."
"Okay."
Normally, Kazuma would have love to see Megumin become jealous over him. But the way she delivered those lines felt like they were laced with venom. And the heavy silence to follow is enough to make him squirm.
"Megu, I-"
"Megumin!"
Oh what now!?
Standing in front of their mansion, uninvited, is a fellow Crimson Demon member pointing at them in a way that looked cooler in her head than it really is.
"As your rival I have waited for your return so that we can continue our challenge to see which of us is-hey! Don't just walk past me I'm talking to you!"
"Go home, Yunyun," Megumin muttered with disinterest.
"W-what's with the cold reply!? You said yesterday to come back tomorrow and I been waiting for you two since the afternoon outside of your home!"
"You know you are welcome to come inside even if no one is here." Kazuma replied.
"That's... not what she said!"
"To repeat history is to invite stagnation. I have no interest in satisfying that fragile ego of yours with pointless games."
Kazuma glances at Megumin like he just met her for the first time. The level of coldness this girl can reach could bring about the next Ice Age.
"What's with you!? You-you may say that now! But that will change once I beat you once and for all!"
"Fine, I accept on the terms of my choice of challenge."
"H-hey wait, you can't-"
"First one to sleep with Kazuma wins," Megumin raises the baffled adventurer's hand up along with hers, "I win."
"Hey don't involve me in this again!"
"WHA-! Th-that's not fair, Megumin! He's your boyfriend-!"
"Yes, but Kazuma's the type who would not hesitate with sleeping in the same bed with another woman if given the chance. So what's your excuse? Other than being a child that is."
This girl! She's really twisting the knife in both of us!
Yunyun's eyes swelled up before turning away from them running and shouting, "You didn't have to go that farrr, Megumiiiiiiin! Waaahhh!"
Megumin already started heading to the door while Kazuma watches Yunyun still trying to process that turn of event.
So cold... is this because I gave her such a low rating on that explosion?
No... it was because I insulted her and the village she really cares for. And all she did was called me a coward... And I only proved her right. Maybe I was the one out of line.
"Oi, Megumin!" Kazuma calls out to her.
She pauses at the doorway with her hand already on the knob but not turning to face him.
Kazuma took a deep breath, somehow feeling the pressure squeezing him knowing what he could say now will affect everything.
"I... I'll make your favorites for dinner tonight!"
"..."
"T-to make it up for losing the m-money-no... for what I said earlier... I'm sorry, I didn't mean what I said... your clan is important to you, and I shouldn't have crossed that line... nor kept mocking your f-frame... I know I keep saying that, but to me you're beautiful-ah I mean-!" Kazuma couldn't help control himself. Fighting through situations before in quests and against the Demon Generals were nowhere near as difficult to him as this. Never had he imagine that this would happen to him when he first step into this world.
And yet here he is, desperately trying to salvage the situation. Afraid to lose something as meaningful as this to him.
"W-what I'm trying to say is... I-"
Kazuma stopped as he felt two small hands gently wrapping around his right hand. He looks up only to see the back of her head as she's looking down in front of him.
"You would mock my body and yet always hold me close at night. You would treat me like a child and act mature but you couldn't even keep a straight face talking to me or about our relationship. You would even not hesitate to throw both of us into a slope but still carried me the way back and tend to my wounds."
Megumin laughs as tears began welling up.
"You're a walking contradiction! But that's what I love about you! You can be mean and arrogant but you're a wonderful man by heart. I could never hate you or stay mad at you. I forgive you, and I'm sorry for being such a child today. I don't want this day to end badly between us either."
Megumin smiles up at him, "I'll still visit you tonight, okay?"
"...okay."
"Chu~"
Kazuma stood his ground as Megumin walked away after planting a kiss on his cheek and into the house. He immediately collapses as if the kiss was secretly a Drain Touch spell.
"My, if that were to go any longer I would've thought we were getting a heat wave!"
"AHHH!" Kazuma scrambles upward by the sound of Vanir's voice, "How much did you see!?"
"Enough to start making bets whether we'll be seeing another member of the Crimson Demon to enter onto our world."
"That's not funny!"
"Considering what I am here to deliver, I wasn't aware it would be a joke." Vanir presents the same box Kazuma bought before him.
"Oh... that's right... is this actually for real?"
"You ask that now after making the purchase? What ever happened to that merchant intuition of yours?" Vanir shakes his head, "But yes, this artifact will certainly be quite effective. Though if you're that desperate to make a daughter, we could've settled for a contract."
"Hey! First of all why are you so sure it will be a girl! And second, even if it... might happen tonight, I'll settle for this 'cursed' object instead!"
Vanir smiles before turning around and waving, "If you insist! Considering your luck with women, one does not have to be an all-knowing goddess or demon to tell. Oh and the receipt's in the bag!"
After watching him go, Kazuma suddenly felt the weight of the words said to him.
"My luck with... women... yeah, I can certainly see that too..." Kazuma mutters while looking down at the box in the bag before noticing the slip of paper, "Oh right, how much was it again?"
He pulls out the receipt and glances over.
"GAAAHHHHHHHHH! THAT BACKSTABBING DEMON!"
Author's Notes
Second chapter but it's a two-parter, and it's not even night time yet? What a hack.
Apologies for that, but I felt if I were to continue then it would just be a really long chapter. But there will be more hi-jinx for these awkward love birds to face. So stay tuned.
̶A̶l̶s̶o̶ ̶A̶l̶i̶c̶e̶ ̶i̶f̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶a̶r̶e̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶d̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶s̶ ̶p̶l̶e̶a̶s̶e̶ ̶c̶o̶m̶e̶ ̶b̶a̶c̶k̶