Sorry about the long wait. First there were Christmas, at the end were university exams (kinda still are, but shhh! Don't question my life choices if you get profit from them) and in between I was learning how to draw manga. I'm afraid I have the problem of Leonardo da Vinci - many interests and quite a lot of talent, but as a result I hardly get anything done on time and can't focus on one thing for long. Looks like writing on shedule just isn't my thing. Oh well.

Another news, now I have a beta reader valiantly protecting the quality of this fanfiction. Big thanks to DeathLord-92. All chapters except for the previous one are already edited. And now it's reviews time.

Guest - Oh ho, not quite. That would be once two worlds will collide and Ted and Azirra will have a true conversation. But yes, story is getting more complicated. This chapter is the last part of the 'warm up', after that Nerevarine will truly begin her adventure with her arrival to Balmora.

The nerd who likes digimon - First of all, thanks for not one, not two, but three reviews. Now for all your concerns, starting from the beginning. Thank you, I appreciate your compliment. Yeaaah, I know, I'm bad with the usage of 'the', my biggest problem right next to tenses. Hopefully with my new beta reader aiding me that will no longer be a problem. Yes, the player will be a mage, although her path of advancement will be different from the one in the game, a bit more... let's say dramatic and unexpected. Nerevarine, the word is Nerevarine. Basically, Nerevarine is a reincarnation of ancient Dunmer warrior and saint, Lord Nerevar Indoril. Just like the protagonist of Skyrim is the Dragonborn and the one in Oblivion is the Hero of Kvatch, the player character in Morrowind is called Nerevarine. For now that's all you need to know about the subject, it will be explained in the story in detail. Alright, thanks, I'll keep in mind Morrowind's fauna needs more explanations, it is quite different from the rest of the Tamriel. As for the holiday specials, well, that's not really my thing. I believe a holiday special should be just that, special. Unless I have a really good idea, I won't write such chapters. Besides, it's way too early for those - the story is just beginning and I never was a fan of big time jumps.

With that said, dig in!

The stench of rotting flesh was the first thing that greeted Azirra after reclaiming consciousness. As sad as it sounds, it wasn't the worst way she's ever woke up.

She changed her mind as soon as she noticed a dead body right next to her and recalled just how she ended up here. This time her silent panic attack was very short, since it appeared she wasn't in any immediate danger.

"Bloody dragons..." muttered Khajiit. "I really hope it's just those mushrooms I found. Vvardenfell is strange enough."

After she managed to convince herself that the dragon was a hallucination (she tried the same for the part about the falling mage, but she still had some of his blood on her...), Azirra focused her attention on the dead man.

He was an Imperial, probably in his forties. The set of clothes he wore was of better quality than hers, but they had become worthless due to amount of blood covering them. Azirra wasn't a healer, but she did figured out a deep wound in his chest wasn't caused by a wildlife. This man was murdered, probably just a few days earlier, judging by the stink.

She took a deep breath through her mouth and walked over to the corpse to search through his pockets. She might have been a bit unaccustomed to this kind of thing (one of the perks of living in Kvatch for many years), but someone who was poor their entire life learns to accept someone else's loss as their gain. That's just how the world works.

Surprisingly enough, the supposed victim of a bandit still had money with them. And not just a few coins, but two hundred septims! Azirra frowned. It wasn't a robbery, that much was clear.

The identity of the man had not remained unknown for long. In another pocket she found a tax record of Seyda Neen with the name of an official - Processus Vitellius.

A taxman, she thought. Few professions were despised as much as this one. Azirra wondered if anyone even knew he disappeared.

To keep, or not to keep - that is the question.

Azirra, just like most people, liked the concept of a nice number of septims falling into her hands without any strings attached. That, however, was the problem - she knew dead money rarely came up without any complications. If she were to keep the collected taxes, with her luck it would surely come up later in the future to bite her in the ass. Were two hundred septims worth it?

No, she decided once she entered the village. They weren't. Not after she just got out of prison.

"Captain Gravius?" started Azirra entering the office. The legionary looked at her above the stack of papers he was filling.

"Yes? I believe I explained everything there was to explain few hours ago. Is there something else?"

"Kind of. You see, I was just collecting ingredients for a potion in the swamps... and I found the body of a taxman. He still had his documents."

Gravius frowned, but he had shown no surprise at her words.

"I pretty much expected this to happen, no one saw a trace of him for the last two days." Legionary shook his head. "I'll have to send some of my men for the body. Where exactly should they search?"

"It's not well hidden, to be honest. An edge of a bigger island, right next to a boulder."

"Very well. Speak about this to Socucius Ergella, his superior. You already met him."

"I see. Thank you."

Azirra left through the second door and entered the main building of the office. Thanks to her amazing determination and ability to ignore anything unimportant to her current main objective, she managed to pass through the unguarded room full of shiny things without taking anything. To be honest, it was a torture - it's one thing for a Khajiit to do so once, but to return later and find all those things still in place, without anyone even checking if everything is in the right place... That's just cruel.

As it turns out, Ergalla's pile of paperwork had not decreased in her absence. In fact, it might have even grown a bit. She knocked on the frame of the door to avoid startling him as much as the first time, but the result was similar.

"What is it?!"

"Just came in to inform you I found your taxman. Someone stabbed him and left the body in the swamp."

Official immediately calmed down, which, however, didn't mean he was happy.

"I... I see. I shouldn't really be surprised... Me and Thavere Vedrano were the only ones in the town who liked him, not to mention his job made him a target for any outlaws in the area. After he went missing, it was clear something terrible had happened." Muttered Ergalla and gave Azirra a serious look. "So, Vitellius was killed and robbed in the swamps?"

"Not exactly. He was indeed killed there, because I hadn't noticed any trails of dragging, but he still had the collected taxes." Azirra pulled out a small pouch and placed it on the desk. Much to her annoyance, he seemed flabbergasted. Was it really so strange, the sight of a Khajiit returning money to the authorities?

"He wasn't robbed? Strange." Oh. That was the reason of his expression. Never mind, Ergalla was a good guy in her book. Perhaps she was a bit oversensitive. "If it wasn't the work of bandits, then it must have been someone from the town. There's a murderer on the loose..." Official took the pouch and put it away in one of the drawers of the desk. "You know, Miss..."

"Azirra." Nice or not, he definitely had a problem with remembering names.

"Yes, Miss Azirra... I have a proposition for you. The death of Processus, due to him being a government employee, will be surely soon examined by Sellus Gravius and his men, but I'm afraid they will never find the murderer. You see, locals don't like legionaries. Uniform makes them reluctant to share rumors. You, on the other hand, are someone with no duties and known loyalties. Just another traveller."

"You want me to... conduct an investigation?" Wow, just wow. Prisoner in the morning, investigator in the evening. Looks like the gods had finally gotten around to making up for years of bad luck.

"Indeed. Processus is... was a friend of mine. I really shouldn't do this, since it's not exactly legal..." Ergalla's eyes wandered over to the soldier standing next to the door. He definitely had a lot of experience in guard duty - not every newbie can sleep and stand straight at attention at the same time. "...But no one is going to find out if Processus' last payment, which he was about to receive today, would become a reward for the person who finds his murderer. He surely wouldn't mind. I'll also add a little bonus from my own pocket. You don't have to apprehend the criminal, just find out proof and deliver it to Captain Gravius. What do you say?"

Azirra considered the pros and cons. The only thing she was likely to lose was time, but, despite her eagerness to deliver the package to Balmora in reasonable time, she wasn't in too much of a hurry. There was also the possibility of danger, but all of Morrowind was dangerous for a lone Khajiit, so nothing new there. The potential gain far exceeded the risks.

"I suppose I can at least try. We have a deal."

"Splendid. Perhaps you should talk to Processus' girlfriend first. She lives in the lighthouse. Now, if you'll excuse me, I must return to my work."

Her talk with Thavere Vedrano was a somber one.

The Dunmer woman was already worried because of Processus' long absence. It was a shame Azirra hadn't included the loss of a relatively good mood among the cons before she made the deal. It took her at least a half hour to calm Thavere down.

"I just don't understand why anyone would hurt him! He was the calmest person I ever knew!"

Thavere also had the tendency to stray from the subject.

"I have no doubt. Did he have any enemies? Was he arguing with anyone recently?"

"Enemies? The townspeople didn't like him, but it never got more serious than the usual aversion of imperial representatives. And yes, he was arguing with some people a few days ago. It was normal, it always happened when he came to gather taxes. Fargoth and that Argonian, Fine-Mouth, kept telling the taxes were too high. Foryn Gilnith even had audacity to claim that Processus was skimming off the top for himself! Uncouth brute."

Azirra realized Vedrano wasn't going to be of any more help, not in this state. Perhaps what she learned would be enough. She had had enough of her shrill voice, too.

"Interesting. I'll look into this. I believe you should rest, Miss Vedrano. You were of great help." NOT.

Turns out Thavere actually had something useful for her. Shame she decided to say so at the very end.

"Oh, one more thing! Please, if you find it, can you bring me back his ring? I gave it to him a few months ago and he had always worn it since. At least I would have something to remember him by."

"I... of course."

Azirra left the lighthouse.

There was no ring on the body, she realized. She was sure of it. It appears the murderer DID steal something. But why, if not for profit?

That gave her a clue, not a great one, but it was good enough. Still, not much to go on... Hold on, hadn't she found a tax record on the body? Azirra pulled out the list.

"Processus Vitellius

Seyda Neen Census and Excise Office

Arrille - 450 drakes - PAID

Draren Thiralas - 200 drakes - PAID

Eldafire - 130 drakes

Erene Llenim - 78 drakes - PAID

Fargoth - 111 drakes

Fine-Mouth - 54 drakes

Foryn Gilnith - 225 drakes

Indrele Rathryon - 127 drakes - PAID

Terurise Grivayne - 98 drakes -PAID

Thavere Vedrano - 134 drakes - PAID

Vodunius Nuccius - 87 drakes"

"Huh." So the people who had been arguing with the taxman still hadn't paid their taxes. Foryn Gilnith's debt was much bigger than the others. Azirra had an idea of who she should talk to next.

"Crito, I'm not a scholar! I'm a battlemage! I don't analyze things, I burn them!"

"Bah! I don't care, Granius! You are the only one in the group who reads them books. So tell me, is this thingie worth anything?"

"How should I know? Just take it to the city and check prices the vendors prices."

"Moron! I must know how much is it worth! If it's rare, it might get us a great deal of gold. If you don't know, then I'll have to take it to a collector."

All of them would say it was worthless, even if it was not, because either they didn't know or because they didn't want to pay too much. That's how collectors buy things. Ted just shook his head. Bandits. Bloody idiots.

After a short flight, our hero managed to find a good place to call a temporary home - a big mountain close to Balmora (but not too close). Yes, it was the same mountain over Fort Moonmoth. The one with Dwemer ruins on the top. He couldn't remember the name, but it was definitely something that sounded like a cat choking on a mouse. All Dwemer cities had such odd names.

The place was perfect. Close enough to civilization for him, but not too close for civilization to him. If there's one thing Paarthurnax was right about, it was that dragons like mountains. There's just something special about looking at the world from the very top, laughing at all insignificant dots called NPCs.

There were only two things Ted disliked about the location - there was an already mentioned imperial fort at the bottom of the mountain and a smuggler den in the ruins. Legionaries weren't a problem - how often did guards look up in search of enemies? Almost never, that's why those damned cliff racers were so common. Smugglers, on the other hand... If he could, he would collapse the entry to the underground, thus saving potential travellers from bandits and slightly increasing an average IQ level of citizens of Morrowind. Sadly, such feat was still impossible to him, not to mention this place was important to Nerevarine's quest. If Falling Wizard's presence was any indicator, it was this particular year that the Nerevar reborn arrived to Vvardenfell, even if that Khajiit wasn't the hero himself.

The point is, how stupid must a bandit be to not notice a giant lizard hanging in the air right above you?

"No, I told you many times already! Reman Cyrodiil ISN'T the greatest hero of Tamriel!"

"Face it, Crito, Gaiden Shinji is overrated!"

"Argh! I can't believe I have to work with such idiots! Granius, if you will open any of your fancy books about combat, you will find Shinji's name on one of the first twenty pages!"

"So? Most books for some strange reason aren't even that long!"

Okay, now they argue about great heroes. That's enough.

"Rargh!" exclaimed Ted, slamming into the ground in front of the smugglers. Both Imperials gave him their full attention. "You are both wrong! The greatest hero of all times is Pelinal Whitestrake! For the love of whatever god you believe in, he was a time travelling robot who was sent to the Merethic Era to deep-six an evil sorcerer demigod, you cannot become more awesome than that!"

Both mortals took up defensive positions.

"But Reman created an empire!"

"So? Empires rise and fall. Which Empire do we have? The third? Fourth? I lost count."

"Shinji built an arena in the Imperial City. His accomplishment stands strong and proud to this day!"

"Don't make me laugh! The very fact you stand here today and argue with me instead of working in the mines of Cyrodiil for the elves is a result of Pelinal's fight! There's only one thing more epic than his battle against Umaril."

Both bandits looked at each other with eyes filled with curiosity.

"What would that be?" Asked the chief, Crito.

"The story in which Pelinal, Reman and Shinji used the Elder Scrolls to travel through the ages to the time of Planemeld in order to kick Molag's ass."

And that's how fanfiction was created in Tamriel, thought Ted with a smile.

...

Now he only needed to make it a reality.

"Raaargh!" exclaimed Ted, slamming into the ground in front of the smugglers. Both Imperials gave him their full atten...

"Dragon!"

"Kill it!"

"Oh come on!"

An older Imperial, Granius, threw a small fireball at his chest. To be honest, Ted didn't even flinched. There wasn't much mana behind that spell, touching a heated pan in his human form was more painful.

"Bandit 1 uses the Fireball, Dragon weathers the blow" stated calmly the future winner of the confrontation.

The other bandit smacked his companion on the head.

"Idiot! It's a dragon, they're not afraid of fire!"

Granius started to shake so badly he almost lost his cuirass, which was a great achievement in itself.

"I'm out of here!"

"Come back here, coward!" screamed Crito after the battle mage, who was already jumping into the relatively safe depths of Arkngthand. The bandit chief glared at the Dragon Troll.

"I hope you ate a tasty meal, dragon. It was your last. Tonight, YOU will be the meal to my band!"

"Geez, are you even sure you are an Imperial? You sound just like a Nord or maybe even an Orc."

"It's all lies! My dad was an Imperial merchant! RAAAAAA!"

Yep, definitely an Orc, thought Ted, getting his head out of the reach of the man's axe. Sadly, Crito was in a state in which he no longer cared where his weapon would strike, as long as it would be the enemy.

What transpired after that caused a great shame and discomfort to Ted every time he recalled this event in the future. For a second time he saw the world through the red glasses of murder and, well...

Let's just say it was going to be painful to get rid of the bandit's cuirass once Ted would have to go to the toilet.

This is the place. Foryn's house.

Perhaps 'house' was a generous term. The shack was losing terribly against weather and time. It was strange that someone with such poor living conditions had to pay taxes exceeding two hundred septims. Arrille, the richest person in town, had to pay only twice as much.

She knocked.

"Come in, it's open."

The inside wasn't much better than the outside. A hammock, small table, and some sacks with food could be found. No real floor, just well-trodden soil. Add the poorly dressed, annoyed Dunmer in the middle of it all and the picture is complete.

"Who are you? I haven't seen you before."

Fortunately Azirra came up with a good excuse before entering. It was also time to channel her inner Khajiit-speak. She had no idea why most of her kind spoke in third person, and in her opinion it always made them sound foolish, but now it would be helpful.

"This one is Azirra, a friend of Thavere Vedrano. Thavere asked Azirra to help her search for Processus Vitellius. Azirra was told you two have spoken recently. Do you know where he is?"

His look of slight annoyance (which, now that she thinks about it, was a default expression for most Dunmer) yielded to perplexity and then to a sneer. Foryn crossed his arms.

"I think you already know the answer to that question, Khajiit. Ask openly or not at all."

...Am I really so easy to read? Well, here goes nothing.

"Do you know anything about his death?"

"You're damn right I did that fetcher in, and a good thing too!" Proclaimed Foryn with pride. Azirra just gaped. Is he for real? "That thief was overcharging us all on our taxes and keeping the difference for himself. Ask anyone and they will confirm that bastard was showing off his wealth every time he could, just to mock us! All those from the Office are the same."

"Are... Are you mad?!" Azirra completely neglected further acting. "You killed a man just because he was a prick?!"

"I killed him because he was a prick, N'wah and a thief. I had no doubts of what I wanted to do when he took an evening stroll through the swamp. I had no need for his ill-begotten gold, so I left it with him." Answered Foryn without remorse, although the smirk was now gone from his face.

"And what about Thavere? She cried a river when I told her what happened!"

This managed to make Gilnith wince.

"She wasn't to blame in all of this..." muttered Dunmer, finally appearing slightly regretful. "I knew it would cause her pain, but the opportunity was too great. Believe me, in the end he would make her miserable anyway." Foryn pulled out something from his pocket. "I have his ring, I think she gave it to him. I didn't know how, but I knew I had to somehow give it back to her, I couldn't just leave it on the body... She deserves to at least have it back..." His face hardened and he squinted his eyes. Azirra took a step back. "So, how many people are you going to tell it? Just Vedrano... or perhaps also the guards?"

Azirra took a deep breath and smiled broadly.

"Not at all. I completely understand."

"I... see..." Nope. He didn't fell for it.

It's interesting how fast a single object can advance to the very top of the list of most important things in your life. For some it's a pet. Most of the time, it's a very special person. Others have a worthless piece of paper upon which their idol wrote their signature.

As for Foryn and Azirra... at this specific moment said object happened to lie on the nearby table. The latter wanted to get away from it and former to stick it into his 'guests' body.

...Why are you looking at me like that? I'm sure you wouldn't enjoy being stabbed with a sharp fork either. Azirra definitely didn't.

The Khajiit yelped and took a step back, holding her bleeding left hand. The Dunmer decided to not give her a chance of retaliation and lunged towards her. There was only one thing she could do being cornered like this.

As soon as her palms rested on Foryn's face, he screamed like your average character in a horror movie and fell to the floor due to incredible pain. The skin was peeling off his face, revealing muscles beneath, which already started to fuse with the skull, while the eyeballs...

Oh, wait, that's Quirrell, not Foryn.

"Really? Fire Bite spell? Just, really?" Foryn asked. Even with Azirra's hands still covering his face she was sure he only raised one eyebrow and nothing besides that has changed. He even still had the freaking eyebrows to raise, for gods' sake!

"...How? This was always enough in bar fights." questioned Azirra trying to hold onto her courage. This wouldn't be easy - the only close distance destruction spell she ever bothered to learn was a dud.

"You do realize we Dunmers have a strong resistance to fire, right? Comes with living on a volcanic island and getting your race blessed by Tribunal."

Daedra shit.

"Then I guess it's time for my other bar fight trick."

Out came the claws and then shit hit the fan.

It is a miserable experience for most sentient beings, to come to their senses surrounded by blood and human body parts. It can only get worse on one condition - if the missing parts are in your stomach.

"...Oh God..."

Looks like they're going to leave it soon enough.

*disgusting sounds of organic nature*

We shall skip the inner monologue inside Ted's head. At this point it consisted mostly of the word "NO" repeated over and over again. Honestly, that's perfectly normal.

In Ted's opinion, some things just shouldn't be done, no matter if it's in real life, a game, or even a dream. Dropping a sex bomb on your own mother. Introducing an eight year olds to drugs. Eating someone... in a nonsensual way, at least. So, whether a hallucination or reality, what just happened was a solid blow to our protagonist's psyche. Still, once he was done vomiting human meat, he still could at least find some solace in the fact it wasn't his conscious decision... That sadly only meant he now had to be wary of losing himself in battle.

So far Ted ended up in three fights. In the first one he panicked as soon as he received a paper cut and fled. In the second he kept a cool head (and ended the battle with it), but only because his opponent was a one-hit skeleton, and they didn't really pose much danger (as long as it's a world made by Bethesda and not Toby Fox). In the last fight, he tore apart his enemy and ate most of his body in a primal rage. As you can see, his track record wasn't good. Would the same happen next time he was forced to defend himself? Mind you, he had no intention of starting a fight he couldn't finish or for a stupid reason... No, an attempt to create fanfiction in Tamriel was a really good reason, shut up. After all, some things are just bound to make people fight you - screaming you are a Christian in front of ISIS terrorists, walking into a bad neighborhood at third in the morning, having an ugly face. Being a dragon of all things is also on that list. Someone was going to attack him sooner or later. For now he could only pray this butchering was a one time thing.

Finally, Ted was able to calm himself down. The gross aftertaste of vomit was still present though. A trip to the river to take a drink was in order.

"Ugh. That was officially the most disgusting experience of my whole life." concluded Ted. As an afterthought he added, "Looks like the descriptions were right. Human meat does taste like sweeter beef... oh no, why have I said that, here comes a second wave...!"

*THUD*

In all honestly, once Ted saw what exactly he spitted out, he was actually wishing it was a bandit's head for example. Instead, in the puddle of vomit, lied a small cube shaped metal object, now slightly bended and sizzling from stomach acid of the only creature that could eat a man whole and still digest his armor. The dragon's eyes widened in realization at what exactly he had damaged.

"Oh no..."

There, at his feet, lied an object that once was known as the Dwemer puzzle box of Arkngthand.

"I fucked up the main quest."

A/N:

Here it is, the fifth chapter. Personally, I think it lacks something. Perhaps Azirra is not very lively written. I could take more time with this, but you guys already waited long enough. Don't worry, the next chapter shouldn't take a lot of time, I already have over 10k words (yeah, that's one big chapter, I'll most likely split it into two). I noticed that almost every chapter is at least slightly longer than the previous and the same goes for sixth... I guess that's a good sign.

As you see, "The Death of a Taxman" quest is pretty much completed. Not much was changed from game version besides the conversations. Also, in the game Foryn Gilnith fights us only with bare fists, but damn, on the first level he is surprisingly dangerous, kept knocking me down and dealing a lot of damage when I couldn't defend myself. It appears Azirra is your typical Lawful Good character... at least for now. There's a chaotic streak in her, that's for sure, but I decided it would be realistic for her to keep low profile and don't take risks with breaking the law. Won't stay that way for very long, I find Lawful Good boring.

Ted went and made a mess again, this time possibly one with grave consequences. As for bandits - in the game the battlemage is the one that stands watch in front of the entrance to the ruins of Arkngthand (the first big dungeon most of us explores in the game), right next to the Dwemer bridge the players use to get there. Crito is the leader of bandits, he is the only person in the same room in which we find the Dwemer puzzle box for the main quest.

Well, I guess that would be enough lore for this chapter, there wasn't much this time. The next chapter is special - Azirra arrives to Balmora, first big city we see in Morrowind, meets Caius Cosades and the best questline in the history of The Elder Scrolls truly begins... kind of. It's not yet time for her to gather intel on the big bad.