Up In The Air ch. 3
I don't know what I was thinking when I agreed to meet Santana at the park today but I didn't have a choice in the matter as far as my children are concerned as they begged, pleaded and cried for me to take them there. I know they wanted to see the rock star, seeing that they communicate through my cell phone since they met in the airport but I'm wary of having her around them as I hardly know anything about her except that she knows Mercedes and she's a singer.
After our conversation last night when the kids had finally gone to sleep, I had called the dark skinned diva and asking what does she really know about the Latina but she wasn't much help on the matter but she did assure me that she was someone that trusts. I'm stepping out on a limb here but I do trust my friend's judgment as I arrived at that park ten minutes before the designated time Santana requested, allowing the kids to play on the playground while keeping a watchful eye on them.
Harmony and Marley were swinging on the swings as Bailey was sitting under a tree, drawing in his sketchbook that he carries with him everywhere as it's been awhile since I had a peaceful moment like as raising three children does take its troll. It has been difficult but my children are happy and healthy as well as enjoying themselves then it's well worth it as I notice a small blonde child walking to my girl with bright smile on her face, animatedly talking with her hands.
She was maybe half an inch shorter than the twins with blonde hair in pigtails and from what I could tell she has blue eyes in a purple shirt, black tights and a pink tutu, raising an eyebrow at the odd fashion choice but it isn't my place to judge as it added to her adorableness. I looked out the corner of my eye to see that my is no longer sitting by himself as he's looking away from the page he's drawing on as he's carrying a conversation with a girl around his age who's currently hanging upside down from one of the lower hanging tree branches.
I'm worried that she might lose her grip and falling from that height to cause a concussion or permanent brain damage as I made a move to help down when a hand gently stops me. I turned to come eye to eye with a smiling Latina standing in front of me as I take in her appearance to notice that she's in a white sleeveless tank top underneath a grey vest, a black form-fitting jeans with a chain connecting from the front belt loop to one in the back, and black knee high boots. Her hair is flowing down her back, decent sized hoop earrings in her ear, her hands dawning black fingerless gloves, and her eyes are being cover by a pair of sunglasses as she pushes them to the top of her hand, revealing her mocha brown eyes as find myself drowning in.
"Hey mi amore, you're looking beautiful as ever" Santana said smiling.
"Starting off early with the flirting, aren't we Santana?" I asked raising a eyebrow.
"It's not flirting if it's the truth and I keeps real" Santana chuckles. "Looks like the ninos are having fun"
"Indeed but I can't seem to place the girls. I've never seen them before"
"Oh they're mine" Santana said off-handedly.
"What? You have children?" I said shocked.
"What? No! They're my god-kids. The little one with Harmony and Marley is Charlie and the one with Bailey is Beth." Santana said gesturing to each child. "I thought it would be good to spend time with you guys and them at the same time since I knew that you had kids around the same age as my friends. It seem like a win-win situation"
I don't know why I feel relieved that Santana doesn't have children as well but I can't be completely sure that she doesn't have any as far as I know of as I just have to see. I look at Beth who's still hanging on the branch before righting herself as she makes 'come on' motions at my son as he dusts the dirt off the back of his pants then moves to climbing up the tree and I move to stop him but Santana stops me. I raise an eyebrow at her as she moves towards the duo, Bailey notices her as his face lights up before jumping off of the branch to hug her which she returns, ruffling his hair.
The rock star tells them something and they nodded in understanding before walking to where I'm standing when the twins rushes over to her, hugging in excitement as she listens to them about whatever they're rambling about at the moment. She laughs as Harmony pulls her towards the slide, sitting at the top of it and placing Marley in her lap before sliding down to the bottom as Charlie and Harmony slide down together with it being obvious that they're having fun.
Santana is a natural with children as it's apparent that children adore her as the younger children decide to play a game of hide-and-seek but stayed where we could see them as the Latina returns to my side, sitting on the picnic tables. She leans back somewhat, patting the empty space next to her as I roll my eyes at her but I complied because I want to and not because she's asking me to with my arms folded, one leg crossed over the other.
We sat there quietly as Harmony searched over the playground in search of the other girls walk but I couldn't help the calmness that's surrounding the vivacious sitting next to me as she has so much going for her. I couldn't see for what reason why she would choose to pursue a woman with three kids with no current concrete plan for a career at the moment when she more than likely has men and women throwing themselves at her feet.
I didn't even know who the Latina was when we met and I'm not at all interest in her money or impressed by her fame as I'm used to being around talented people. I looked at Santana out the corner of my eyes to see how calm and relaxed she is right now, like all her cares are just blowing away with the breeze when she looks over at me as I quickly look away but I knew that I was looking if the light giggling was anything to go by.
"I don't mind you staring, mi amore. It doesn't bother me"
"I didn't mean to" I said shaking my head.
"It's okay. I like that you're checking me out as long as I get to check out" Santana said winking at me.
"Do you always have to be such a flirt?" I asked rolling my eyes.
"Not always, only when a woman is keeping me company" Santana said smirking.
"So any attractive woman would do then" I said frowning.
"No, just you" Santana said looking me in the eye.
I wanted her to be deceitful or dishonest, I was expecting her to be but when I looked into those soulful brown eyes I knew that she wasn't because all I could see was sincerity staring back at me. I hate that I was expecting the worst from Santana as she hasn't done anything for me to not trust her but I just…I just can't bring myself to do so as the last time that I trusted someone, they left and betrayed her. I spent so long thinking that I wasn't good enough, that there was something that wrong with me, that there could have something I could've done to stop it from happening as I gave up everything for this person.
For a long time, I didn't know who I was without this person and I had built my life around them only to have it come crashing down around, hating every second of it but the good thing that has come out it are my children. They're my light and I want them to be happy but at times, I feel a little selfish that I want happiness for myself as well. I'm pulled out of my thoughts when a comforting hand touches my cheek, giving it a reassuring squeeze to realize that it's the rock star, looking at me with such care that I couldn't bring myself to look away.
"I'm here for you, Rachel if just as your friend or a lover preferably as a lover" I laugh despite myself. "If you'll have me, you got me because I'm want to be there for you"
"Why? You don't even know me" I said biting my lip.
"I know but that doesn't stop me from wanting to get to know you. I'm not like that person that hurt you" Santana said taking my face in her hands. "Although I know that I can't promise that I won't hurt you but I can promise you that I'll do my utmost to keep her heart if you'll one day decided to reside it with me"
"I want to trust you, Santana I really do but I don't know if I can" I said sighing quietly.
"One day at a time and I'll put in the work to earn your trust" Santana said placing a lingering kiss on my face.
"Oooooooo"
We looked to that we have an audience watching as Santana chuckles before chasing after three girls with a overly exaggerated monster roar with Bailey rolls his eyes as he turns his attention to drawing the scenery. I scan the playground for Beth but she was nowhere in sight as my protective mother's sense kicked in when a flash of blue/green flannel behind me, turning to see the girl was sitting on top of the table with her feet on the bench. She hops of the table, scrutinizing me as she circle around me once before stopping in front me, crossing her arms over her chest, shifting most of her weight to one foot.
"Don't hurt my god-Mami" Beth said before wandering towards the pond.
Did I just get her approval? What did she mean hurt her god-mother? Did something happen in Santana's past? I'm not sure what to make of Beth's statement but I packed it away for a later if Santana and I decided to pursue a relationship of the romantically persuasion but as for, we'll see the future has in store for us. We spent a couple of more hours before deciding to grab something to get some this little restaurant close by that's very kids friendly but it's an array vegan choices for to choice from.
When I asked the rock star how she knew about me being a vegan, she came clean about asking Mercedes about where to take me and did a little research so I would able to get something so I could avoid getting sick. I was honored that the Latina would go that far for me as no one has ever gone that far as most people often forget or over look that small fact as dinner was hectic and messy that's a package deal when you're dealing with five rambunctious children.
Around the time that we managed to convince the younger girls to leave, Santana found her carrying two sleeping twin while my favorite ballerina has been glued to my hip since we left the park while Bailey and Beth talk about an endless supply of things. Once we reached my apartment, the rock star quickly changed them into their pajamas and put them to bed but not before placing a kiss on each of their forehead then tries to pry Charlie's arms from around my neck. She hugs my son goodbye before moving towards me, giving me one last lingering kiss on the forehead then leaving as a part of me didn't want her to go when my artist looks at me with a smile.
"Have something to say, young man?" I asked raising an amused eyebrow.
"If you do decide to date again Mom, I think that Santana could be good for you" Bailey said shrugging his shoulders.
"Oh yeah, well I think that you might be a little biased" I said giggling.
"Maybe, maybe not but I think that you should put yourself out. I want you to be happy and I think Santana could put a smile on your face again" Bailey said hugging me.
Leave it to my son to talk some sense into me but I just don't know. I don't know if I'm ready to open myself to another person or if I'll ever be.
~Nicole The Dragon Rider signing off
End of ch. 3