This story is prompted from the song Fuck It by BoTalks. Give it a listen. If language bothers you, be warned that there are a few swear words and also I like swear words and will probably use them in future chapters without a warning like this up top.

"I just got all my stuff here, so it's messy," she warned as she slid the key into the lock and turned it. True to her word, the apartment was revealed to be quite a mess when the door swung open. Boxes were strewn everywhere, some things taken out and placed on the floor near the boxes, but nothing seemed to be put into its rightful place. Not even the couch seemed sure, as it sat dead center of the apartment facing down a hallway that led to a bedroom, bathroom, and spare room.

"Fancy place, Rae," the man chortled as he looked about. A solved Rubik's cube was snatched up from its place in a box and Beast Boy landed on the couch. Within seconds the colors were a disarray and he set himself to the task of trying to fix it again.

"What? I was gonna unpack today and then you wanted to visit. A nonchalant shrug was given as Raven slumped on the couch beside him. "So, I'll unpack tomorrow... probably... At some point everything will be where it needs to be and all will be well."

It had been a short while since the two of them got to physically be in each other's company. Raven had moved out of Jump City, pursed some education, moved back, left again to visit other places that she could not be visited in, and now here she was. Moving back into Jump City again. Hopefully to stay this time. Moving to places in the city wasn't the worst. Moving to different cities and dimensions? That was difficult. All her boxes were brought to the apartment from a storage unit where it had been resting for at least a year, yesterday. After lugging them around to sort what should go in which room, she had been too tired to unpack except for bedding and some clothing into the closet. After getting the mattress off the floor and on a bed frame, she passed out in a dead sleep. That next morning had consisted of Raven opening up boxes and pretending like she was going to find places to put stuff, but a text from Beast Boy who had finally responded changed those plans as he was invited to come over and bask in the underwhelming amount of work she had put into her return.

"I can help you out with unpacking if you want. I've got nothing else going on today," he offered as the colors got more and more mixed up, rather than being solved in any way.

"Maybe... If I get to that point of boredom, I'll have you help me out."

"You and I both know you could unpack all these boxes without even leaving this couch, though," he pointed out without looking up. "Hell, after where you've been for the past year, you could probably do it with your eyes closed. You don't have to keep doing things the human way, you know. There's no one here that would care in the slightest."

He had a point. After being around "normal" people for so long, it felt strange to want to use her abilities to be able to do mundane tasks, though. Other dimensions encouraged it, but this wasn't there. When Raven was a part of the Teen Titans, it didn't matter if she never did things a human way. After living among them for three years, did she forget who she was?

"Yeah, yeah. I'll get to it eventually. Just been around people for too long. Didn't even think about doing it." That was definitely going to cut down the time it took to fully move into the place.

"It's because you dated that guy for so long and never told him that you were a half demon with bad ass powers. I don't know why you never tell anyone. You've always had the coolest powers, probably even more so after wherever you just were." Beast Boy's subtle adoration did not go unnoticed.

"How's Terra?" The topic was changed, for lack of wanting to discuss it. Much to Raven's vexation, Beast Boy had kindled a relationship with Terra, that seemed to have grown to a full flame. Even though she didn't remember betraying them, working for Slade or anything about the Titans whatsoever, Raven still held that over her. Her sacrifice be damned, Raven was still pissed after all this time. Beast Boy seemed happy though, so she tried to go easy on the traitor. "Haven't heard about her in a minute for some reason."

Beast Boy stopped fiddling with the unsolved Rubik's cube with his eyes growing wide and a sort of emptiness filling his body. He had forgotten the news hadn't been shared with Raven yet. A few moments of silence were taken.

"We uh... we broke up. She decided that other people were better," he replied carefully while glancing down at the mix of colors, but daring not move. Raven froze and it felt like anything that might have been moving in the room did as well. Even the flow of air that had once been able to be heard moving through the vent, and the hum of the refrigerator stopped. You would have been able to hear a pin drop in the carpeted room down the hall. Slowly she turned her head to stare at the green man.

"What do you mean, other people were better?" The question was asked slowly, an almost dangerous edge seeping into her tone. Beast Boy had to take a breath before he could explain.

"I walked into our apartment and she had some other guy in there. Which had apparently been happening for months."

"I'll kick her ass." The words were so immediate even Raven was a little surprised by what she had said, but she was serious, already bringing herself to her feet.

"No, Rae don't do that," he begged, trying to catch the half demon as she stood, but narrowly missed her hand and had to watch as she began pacing the floor. A few boxes had fallen over and the contents spilled, though they hovered above the ground from the bout of anger.

"Who does she think she is? That's one of the worst things you can do to a person." A pause to once again stare at him, rage clear in her eyes. "Where is she?"

"Seriously, it's fine. It happened a few months ago. She had been trying to justify it-"

"You can't justify something like that," she cut him off. More boxes fell, one's contents hitting the ground with a loud clatter. "That's inexcusable. Why the fuck is this the first I'm hearing about it? Why didn't you tell me when it happened?"

"Yeah, I know. She said she was exploring herself or some shit and that she had every right to do so." Now as he was saying it out loud to his friend, it sounded more and more ridiculous and the anger from the time could be felt bubbling back up in his stomach. "I didn't want you to be like this, when I was upset about it. She would be dead by now if we had egged each other on." A moment of silence and clenched teeth was followed by a heavy sigh from Raven while everything was set back into their cardboard containers. He had a valid point. She wouldn't have lasted a day with the both of them being upset about it.

"Maybe if you two weren't in a committed relationship she would have a right to do so. It's been what, almost two years? And she just wanted to throw that all away?" The pacing began again as Raven's nails digged into her palms to avoid breaking any of her belongings. She had experienced that herself with a relationship after only three months and that almost ended in a murder. If it had happened after being together for that long? She didn't let her mind go there.

"Well she didn't want to, she thought it was fine for some god damned reason, but I was thinking about ending it anyway." The pacing stopped and all the anger in Raven's face changed to a look of confusion. The sound of the air flow resumed and the hum of the refrigerator came back as she stared at him in bewilderment.

"What? End it after almost two years of me getting texts about how much you care about her and she might be the one?" He had been extremely annoying about it and the last thing she wanted to hear about after her breakup of a longer more healthy relationship, but she was glad to see him so happy about his whole situation, which was the only reason she didn't tell him to shut up about it.

"Yeah, there was a lot going on and I didn't appreciate it all, and then that all happened. Besides, I realized something about a month before I found out all this was going on."

"What's that?"

Beast Boy took a breath to speak, then stopped. Maybe he shouldn't. Maybe this would end badly. No... Another breath was taken and the Rubik's cube set on the floor as he avoided eye contact. Saying it now would definitely be a bad idea. What else could he say? His eyes raised and caught her violet ones before… Fuck it. "I don't want to just be your friend, Raven."

Oh, not this. Anything but this. All emotions that were evident on her face vanished as she just stared at him blankly. "We broke up years ago -" she began, but was cut off.

"And I've still been in love with you ever since. None of my relationships, not even the one with Terra, felt the same. The one with you just felt so right and I want that again." Turning his body so he was sitting cross legged on the couch, he faced her as she sat down and avoided eye contact, making sure to keep at least one cushion's worth of distance between the two of them.

"Beast Boy - "

"Tell me that you don't," he challenged. "Tell me you don't still love me and I'll back off and we can forget this ever happened."

She wouldn't though, and he knew that. Lying was the one thing Raven wouldn't ever do. Being in the Teen Titans group had made them close before exploring what a relationship together would be like, and even still when that relationship was over. That whole group had grown to be her best friends, but it was different with Beast Boy.

Raven met guys and girls alike for years after they broke up. None of the relationships lasted as long. They all felt like they were missing something and she would drive herself insane trying to decipher what. The longest was with (not counting the three years with Beast Boy) a little over a year with someone human. Her last relationship. A librarian and poetry major graduate student. They had a lot of things in common, but ultimately Raven found it difficult to relate to him in terms of anything except their love for knowledge. She hadn't even been able to be honest about who she was with him, for fear he'd freak out and expose her while she was trying to live a life as a normal person. He had said he loved her, but she never said it back. In fact, she had never said it romantically since the relationship with Beast Boy. No other relationship after was ever as nice or safe feeling.

There was always a constant need to change who she was and what she was for anyone she dated, but the years she dated Beast Boy and the years she was just friends with Beast Boy were the years that changed her for the better. Once her teenage years were over, she found herself not being so serious all the time. Not everything had to be so gloomy. Sometimes she wore bright pink just because it felt like a nice color now. The world didn't have to be dark all the time just because her mother was dead and her father was a crazy demon, and Beast Boy was the one who showed her that. All her powers could be easily controlled, even with positive emotions, something she never thought would happen.

The relationship with each other, had been each party's first. The mechanics of how everything was supposed to go was lost on them. All they had to rely on was what they saw on TV and read in romance novels (which they now knew was absolutely not how it went at all). Which made a break up necessary, at least in the mind of Raven. They had thought they were in love, but how were they to really know what that meant when their lives consisted of being around each other all the time and never even meeting other people? Beast Boy had been convinced this was it. It was the real thing, but Raven had a nagging feeling that it was because it was convenient and they were just fooling themselves. So, a break up took place, just so the chance to explore other options and see if it was real, could be decided. It had been 6 years since then.

The Teen Titans stayed together for a year after their relationship ended, but their break up wasn't the reason for the team fragmentation. At that point in time, everyone just felt ready for different things. Cyborg went to recruit and teach about her life and justice. Robin followed the footsteps of his hero, Batman, and went to be a solo hero (though the solo thing only lasted about a week before Starfire joined him.) Beast Boy and Raven tried to experience normal lives, but such a thing was difficult when you were green, so Beast Boy mostly spent time with Raven and helping Cyborg. Occasionally when someone could overlook the fact that he was green, his time would be spent with someone in a relationship as well. Raven managed to get into a University, experience how awful education was, and get a degree in nothing useful in three years as opposed to the normal four. Afterwards, she spent time searching dimensions in hunt for different forms of mental stimulation that didn't require unnecessary busywork and all-nighters for a good letter on a paper that absolutely no one cared about.

The years living among the humans were the most unbearable for Raven. The only solace during that time was when Beast Boy would come visit and make fun of her for wanting to go to school.

"You should go." The words were spoken after a period of silence. Violet eyes stayed trained down and refused to look at the man beside her. She had dreamed of this conversation happening. Dreamed of getting to have another relationship with him. So why was she treating him like this? Where was the joy? Where was the excitement? Why was she filled with such dread?

"Raven, please. I know we've both changed since we were teenagers, but you're still Raven. You're still you. I've gotten to watch you become who you are and I fall more and more in love with you as I watch you discover yourself."

The moment that was said, a pit of darkness opened on the floor in front of the woman, and without so much as a word, she stood and vanished into it, leaving Beast Boy on the couch, gawking at what had just occurred. Here he was, pouring his heart out, and all Raven did was run away. Albeit in a pretty cool manner, still running away. She had literally just noped herself out of the situation.

"God damn it!" He groaned into the emptiness as he fell backward and let himself slump over the arm rest behind him.

It wasn't until the next day that Raven returned to the apartment, figuring that would have given him enough time if he was waiting, to get bored and leave. What Raven did not expect, was to walk into the apartment and find that the piles of boxes were gone. There was a new pile of broken down boxes in the middle of what was now the living room, and it looked as though everything in the front rooms were unpacked. Not the bedroom, but the kitchen and living room were now full of things instead of boxes. Even the TV that would barely get used was set up and ready to go as soon as the pile of cardboard was removed from in front of it.

Before she could even be upset about the fact that she didn't know where anything was, her eyes fell to a paper on the now put together table at the side of the room. Filled out in the handwriting of Beast Boy.

I realize I was a bit too much. You only just moved back and I shouldn't have thrown something like that at you. I'm sorry. I unpacked the boxes for you, hopefully you found the list about what I put where. It's on the fridge. You have a lot less stuff than I thought you did. You're my best friend and I don't want to ruin that with everything I said. Please call me. Let me know you're okay.

As if on cue, her phone buzzed from its place in her pocket. A text message from... Starfire. There was a strange mixture of relief and disappointment as the name showed on the screen now in Raven's hand. The message entailed Starfire's excitement that she was now back on Earth, followed by multiple other messages trying to arrange a day they could hold a get together with the whole group to catch up with one another, and even an invitation to leave Earth again, but for another planet rather than another dimension. A quick reply was sent off before Raven began inspecting the apartment to see if everything really had been taken care of.

The quick inspection revealed an unpacking and cleaning job nearly identical to when he had helped her move into a place near the University she had attended, which was to say surprisingly flawless. During his teen years he had lived in a pig sty, but since the team had disbanded, he was surprisingly tidy. His own place of residence somehow was always clean every time Raven had visited. True to his word, a diagram of each room was drawn on paper and detailed what was placed where, so she would know.

Taking a seat on the bed in the back room of the apartment, her phone was produced once more. A few more texts from Starfire sat in wait - a mental note was made to get back to those later. Laying back on the bed, the phone was held high above her. The text conversation with Beast Boy was pulled up and a simple message produced.

[TEXT]: I'm alive

Not even ten seconds later, the phone was ringing in her hand with the contact photo of Beast Boy lighting up the screen. Why was he such a fan of speaking over the phone? Texting was more than sufficient. The call was answered after about ten seconds of deliberation.

"Raven? Oh, thank god, I was worried you were gonna run away for a lot longer. Look, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have thrown all that at you. If you're not ready for that, we don't have to talk about it. We can forget it happened."

"Thanks for unpacking. You're right that I could've done it myself in no time, but I appreciate the help." The phone sat hovering near Raven's face while her eyes scanned over the room of belongings. She had thought it would be a lot more difficult to talk to Beast Boy after all the emotions she felt yesterday, but it was surprisingly easy to fall back into the habit.

"I thought it was gonna take forever to unpack, but you don't own a lot of stuff."

"I definitely could've done it on my own."

"Yeah, but now you don't have to." A sort of proud grin could be detected from his tone. What a dork. "Where did you even go when you disappeared?"

"Azarath. It's kind of like limbo, but different."

"Well considering I know nothing of what limbo's like, I can't imagine it. What were you doing there?" Did she tell him what she was doing in her homeland? Maybe a half truth.

"Meditating." Crying and figuring out her emotions was a more accurate answer, but he didn't need to know that. "Just meditating somewhere that was quiet."

"I'm really sorry about last night. I shouldn't have kept going until you felt the need to run away from your own apartment. Can we forget it happened? I don't wanna lose you. You're my best friend."

"No." The word was out of her mouth before she could even think up an appropriate response. It had happened. It wasn't something that could be erased or forgotten. After speaking with the people she did back in her home dimension, she didn't want to forget it.

"What?"

"Umm... Are... are you at home?"

"What? Yeah, I a-" the line clicked and moments later a circle of darkness appeared in Beast Boy's bedroom, Raven stepping through on to the carpeted floor. Beast Boy was laying on his bed with one arm behind his head and the other holding his phone up to his ear as he was still trying to figure out whether or not the call had actually ended. Sitting up with a look of confusion, the phone was tossed aside.

"What are you-" A gray hand went up and Beast Boy's voice stopped, though his mouth still moved. Then it stopped, then it moved more before he looked up at the woman in even more confusion.

"It's my turn to talk. Scoot over." With a slight nod, the man slid over to create room and with her hand still raised, Raven sat cross legged on the bed facing him.

"First things first, I know you're mildly concerned that I know the coordinates to your bedroom well enough to get a portal to exactly here. Get over it." A sort of what the hell kind of look crossed his face, but still no sound was to be heard from him. "Second, no we cannot forget it happened. It happened. It's in the open now. Life would be bliss if we tried to ignore the things we didn't want to hear. But that's not how it works. I spent a lot of time thinking it over while I was gone and I couldn't come up with one single reason why I wouldn't want to be with you." The expression changed from a sort of concerned confused appearance, to one of relief and joy as he tried to speak and found his voice still absent.

"Except." Once again, his expression changed to that of worry. "I need more time. I can't just jump into a relationship with you immediately. I know I've known you for what feels like forever, and it's technically not jumping in" air quotes from her free hand accompanied the words, "a relationship with you, but to just now move back, not even having seen anyone else yet, and be immediately in a relationship feels too abrupt. So. If you are willing to wait until I no longer feel like it's a snap decision, then we can try... In a few weeks."

A look of, watch what you say, was given before her hand was lowered.

"...esting, testing 123. Hey it's back!" Were the first words out of Beast Boy's mouth as the hold was expunged and his voice was able to be heard again. "First, I did not know you could do that." A hand pointed at his throat to show his implication of his voice. "That's pretty damn cool. Second, I think he goes by Nightwing now. Third, why the hell do you know my bedroom coordinates, do you creep on me while I sleep?"

"Oh my god, let it go," a groan followed her voice as her eyes rolled in regards to the comment, though a small smile tugged the corners of her mouth.

"Forreal, I'm concerned. I can just set up a live stream or something instead." A teasing grin accompanied the words as Raven reached across and punched his shoulder. "I can get multiple cameras; you can get all the views."

"Oh stop, I don't creep on you while you sleep." A feeling of relief, like a weight was lifted from her shoulders accompanied a lighthearted smile as she listened to the teasing of the green man. "Wait a few weeks. Deal?" Her pinky was extended from a fist and offered toward Beast Boy, who gave a wide grin as he grasped her pinky with his own.

"Deal."

And wait a few weeks he did...not. He did try, he really did. It ended up only being a single week. And it wasn't him who jumped the gun. He had every intention of waiting a few weeks. Few months. Few years. However long she needed. Apparently it wasn't that long.

"Look out! It's behind you!" he blurted urgently.

"I'm well aware it's behind me, but these damn fucking things are in front of me!" she retorted immediately and just as urgently.

"Run! Get out of there!"

"Gee, why didn't I think of that?" The sarcastic remark was met with a pursed lips and a quick hard glare.

"You just gotta..."

"Get your hands out of here!" A swatting motion was made to the green hands that were trying to reach to the game controller in Raven's hands. "Let me die in peace!"

"I can't watch you die on the first level again, it's killing me!" He groaned as he dramatically fell back on the futon with his arms spread out. The high intensity music coming from the game came to an abrupt halt and the game over noise played on the TV screen in the room and Raven gave a heavy sigh before setting down the controller and falling back to join the man on the bed.

"Why are video games so much more difficult than I remember? Fuck this."

"To be fair, you were never good at video games," he teased, earning a playful shove from the woman before they both rolled to their side to face on another. Beast Boy's arm moved up to cradle his head and Raven's legs just pulled closer to become more of a ball shape.

"You know what I was always good at though?"

The question just earned a quizzical look from the male. "Snarky comments...?"

"Well yeah, but also," a pause was put in her words in order for Raven to scoot closer, her legs straightening and a hand moving to behind his head as she quickly closed the gap between their lips with her own. It lasted only a moment before Beast Boy pulled away.

"Wait a second, Rae," he stopped her with a hand on her shoulder. This was definitely against what he wanted to do, but his conscience would never forgive him if he didn't. "What are you doing? You said you needed time."

"And I took time."

"It's been one week."

"Its technically been a lot longer than a week since we were last together."

"You know that's not what I meant. It's been one week since you said you needed time."

"I don't want more time. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that you were right."

A green eyebrow was raised. It wasn't often that Raven ever admitted to him being the one that was correct. "Are you sick? Too much dimensional traveling?"

"No, I'm not sick." Adjusting her position, Raven moved so she was laying on her back and staring at the ceiling. Expressing her emotions was hard enough as is. Expressing them while staring right at him was damn near impossible. "Beast Boy, I love being your friend. I adore having you in my life, and the times I'm around you are the only times I feel accepted in this world. But it was always you. It was always going to be you that I chose. And you knew that because you know me better than anyone. And it's not fair to either of us for me to try to pretend like there was any other way this was going to end. Please stop looking at me like that, you are legitimately making it so difficult to not punch you in the face right now." She didn't even have to look at him to feel the effects of the grin on his face.

The more she spoke, the more his heart fluttered. Of course he knew. It was more of a matter of her realizing it for herself. The more she spoke, the more smug of a grin he also gained, though, because being told he was right by one of the worlds most stubborn people had an amazing boost on his confidence.

"You're sure you aren't sick? The Raven I know would never admit that I was right." The tone was teasing for the sole purpose to lighten the mood.

"I'm not gonna say it more than once.. Don't get used to it." Her head turned to look further away from him in order to save her own pride that she had dismissed to admit such things, and also to hide the heavy amount of blushing that resulted from her saying such things. A green hand reached over to gently cup her cheek and pull her head the opposite way toward him though, so their foreheads and noses could meet together. His eyes were closed just because he knew how embarrassed she probably was, and her eyes did the same as she shifted to be laying on her side again.

"Thank you. I know you aren't comfortable with emotions like that so it means a lot to me that you said all that. But I swear to god if you die on this level again I'm taking the controller and playing through that section for you because watching you try to get through it hurts my very soul."

"You're not touching the fucking controller when it's my turn to play, Beast Boy," she replied in a sweet, yet stern voice that he could only heavily sigh at in defeat.

A/N: So this is not my favorite writing I've done. It leaves a lot to be desired. A build up to this sort of thing would have made it feel more like how I saw it in my head. Explanations I didn't want to come up with for where Raven went and what it looked like, could have been provided. I hated what I wrote for that so it is not in there. It just feels rushed, but there honestly isn't much I could've done, in my mind, to change what it was. So this is what you get. Fight me 'bout it.

Also, if you want to see some great Robin x Starfire, hit up the profile Supernova. Iris (get rid of the space between the "." and the "I", for some reason it omits her name if I write it out as her actual pen name) as she is writing a story with the same title as me and using the same prompts, but using her own fantastic writing style. We're going to attempt to upload stories every other Sunday until we get bored of this project, but if life happens then life happens. She's pretty bomb, would recommend checking her out. Song choices of what the prompt is for the chapter will alter between her and I.

Edited on 2/21/2020 to include more at the end because way more was to be desired from how I left it originally.

Thanks for reading :)