AUTHOR'S NOTE: I realized after reading my previous note, that I made it sound like Ben and Lisa are out of the story. They are not, they will be back after The Winchesters finish visiting with Missouri. I love all your reviews, and I thank each of you that takes the time to leave one for me.
I have two favors to ask- one is your opinion on Ben and Lisa. Do you want them to stay as part of the story or do you want them gone? I have a couple different plotlines in mind, and the story could go a couple different ways. I've already gotten some feedback from some of you and all the different opinions have been eye opening, with some points brought up that I didn't even consider. You can tell me in the comments or shoot me a PM if you have an account, I'd love to hear from you!
The second favor is this- I've been writing a new fic called "Riders on the Storm", it's another Supernatural AU with a new OC. It's different and it's the darkest thing I've written so far, and I'd like some feedback. If you could take the time to read and let me know what you think, that would be wonderful. (Although I realize that it won't be a story for everyone because it does have some dark themes, so if it's not your thing, I get that too) Thank you! XXXOOO
CONTENT WARNING: More sads, discussion of character deaths, have the tissue box handy.
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We drove to Missouri's house, and Uncle Sam went with Grandpa John in his truck. None of us talked on the walk back to the parking lot, or in the car.
When we got to Missouri's house, she brought us inside quietly, and hugged each of us, murmuring quietly to Grandpa John as she held him and patted his back.
"Are y'all hungry, I've got the jambalaya ready to re-heat, and you know it's always better on the second day," she smiled.
Everyone shook their heads- I think that crying at the cemetery had taken something out of them. I felt tired too, and Daddy looked drained and sad.
"Well, I have somethin' to show you, come on," Missouri led us down the hallway. "This is my reading room, I use this for card readings and seances when I have 'em," she told us. There was a low table set up at the far end of the room, with all kinds of objects on it- little statues, different kinds of shells and gemstones, a tiny bird's nest, and candles.
"This is my altar," she said, "It's what I use when I worship, to help me focus my power and energy. I've made it up special today for All Soul's and to honor Mary."
There was a photo of the blonde lady on the altar, surrounded by loose flowers from Missouri's garden, some low candles, and a small dish of food.
Missouri held her hands out with her palms up over the altar, and said, "As the shadows are growing longer with the time of year, we turn our thoughts to the past and those who are no longer with us. Our memories bring both joy and pain; let us recollect and share in all the emotions that this day brings forth. May these loved ones live on today as we reflect and remember, and remind us that we are not really alone, that they are still with us in our hearts," She took a deep breath and then lowered her hands.
"Thank you," Grandpa John murmured, "Where- where did you get the photo?"
"I have somethin' for you, I've been saving it 'til I saw you again," she walked over to the side of the room, and brought over a flat gray metal box.
"I keep an eye on your old house, and the people who live there. There was a young family that moved in a couple of years ago, they had trouble with a poltergeist and I helped 'em out."
Grandpa John looked at her sharply. "Was it-"
She shook her head. "No, it was just a random spirit. That house was more open to supernatural energies, but I fixed it. I went and put hex bags in the walls on every floor, and it's been quiet ever since. But the homeowner found this shoved in the back corner of the basement, I'm guessing that when the house was re-built the contracters found this and didn't throw it away." She handed the box to him.
Grandpa John flipped it open. It had photographs and papers in it.
"Oh, my God, I haven't seen this-" he said in a choked voice, "This was Mary's box to save special papers in," He rifled through and pulled out a certificate, "Look, this is Sammy's hospital certificate," the paper had two little black footprints on it, "She hadn't gotten around to making his baby book yet," he chuckled and looked at Uncle Sam, "Everyone in the hospital said you had the longest fingers and toes of any baby they'd ever seen."
"Even back then he was a moose," Daddy quipped, and Uncel Sam smacked Daddy's arm.
"Well, if you don't mind, I'd like to take Charlie and talk some more, and do some work with her while y'all go through that," Missouri said, "Charlie, is that all right with you, sweetie?"
"Yeah," I agreed.
Daddy squeezed my shoulder and smiled at me. "We'll be right here."
I followed Missouri back to the living room. There were a couple of fresh-cut asters on the coffee table, and she lit the smudge stick and smudged us both again like she had yesterday. She said it was good to use before I did any sort of work with my abilities.
Missouri sat down next to me. We did some deep breathing- inhale through the nose, exhale through the mouth- that she said were "cleansing breaths".
She asked me more questions about times that I had seen things when I had touched people, and then she asked about what had been happening recently. I talked and talked, telling her about everything. Missouri was easy to talk to, she gave me all her attention and she asked questions that showed she was really listening. When I cried, she rubbed my back or patted my arm. She told me that I was very strong for all of the things I had been through recently.
Then she asked about my dreams. She said that Grandpa John had told her about the dreams I had when I was sick. I told her about all the different images and how upsetting they were.
"It was scary 'cause I had dreamed about Grandpa John having cuts on his face, and then when he came back, he had them just like in my dream. He said that sometimes when we dream, things might come true but then something might change to make it not happen."
"That's right," Missouri said.
"I don't get it."
"Well, think about it this way. Everyone has their own life, and when people's paths cross things can change. There are things that happen that you can't control. You might dream that you're gonna fail a test at school, and worry 'bout it, but the when you go to school the next day, you find out that the test is postponed because the teacher got sick. You couldn't control what happened to the teacher, just your own life. So things that you dream can change in an instant. Just because you dreamed something one way doesn't mean that that's the way it's going to happen."
"Grandpa John said that you might dream that you're going to the park the next day, but then a sudden rainstorm happens, so that changes what you had planned."
She nodded, "That's another good explanation for it. Do you get it now?"
I nodded, feeling relieved. Then I shifted on the sofa. "I had another dream about a witch, after, uh-" I felt myself blushing. For some reason I felt embarrassed.
"What is it, child?" Missouri asked gently.
"Well, I uh, I was looking for my toothbrush in Uncle Sam's bag and there was a knife, and I picked it up to move it and Daddy thought I was playing with it, and he—he spanked me really hard," I lowered my head, feeling guilty.
"Oh, child," she said.
"He, uh, said he was sorry and all, and the next day everyone was really mad at him."
"He's so worried for you, honey, you're his baby girl and he doesn't want anything bad to happen to you. He over-reacted, but he knew he did you wrong."
I nodded. "I had a dream, that night, about going to a house with a lady who was a witch. Mommy was with her and said Daddy wasn't good at being a daddy and I had to make a spell to bring her back. The lady in the dream who said she was a witch told me to go in Daddy's trunk and to look for a special book called a grimmer. A grim- oire," I tried to pronounce it correctly.
Missouri got very still. "Tell me more about this, child, everything you can remember."
I told her everything I could remember about the dream, what the lady and the house had looked like, and exactly what Mommy had said to me about Daddy being an unsuitable guardian and not equipped to be a father. I told her how Daddy and Uncle Sam had been investigating a witch at the time.
"All right, I need to do something," she said. She rubbed her palms together. "I'd like permission to go into your mind, if I may. I'd like to check something out."
I nodded.
"All right, you think about that dream you had, and I'm gonna put my hands on your head for focus."
She reached out and put a hand on either side of my head. "Close your eyes now," she murmured.
I thought about the dream, and then I started to think about when I had done the spell and how I had gotten into trouble.
After a couple of minutes, Missouri took her hands away from my head and sat up straight, looking at me. "Oh, honey, you tried to do the spell?" she asked.
I nodded, feeling myself blush again. "I-I didn't know how—how dangerous it really was."
"I wish you had talked to someone about how you were feelin' about everything, that whole situation could have been avoided if you'd just talked, but then, Winchesters aren't known for talkin' 'bout their emotions," she shook her head, "You learned you lesson, though, didn't you?"
I felt my face get even hotter, and I looked down at my lap. "Yeah, I got in a lot of trouble," I whispered. That had been one of the worst spankings I had ever gotten from Daddy, and I never wanted to go through that again.
She cupped my face and smiled. "You're such a sweetheart and you've got such a good spirit, I can't imagine punishing you, but I have to say in that case I think your Daddy did the right thing. That was a very unsafe thing you did, and he needed to make sure you knew it."
I blushed harder. "I—I know," I agreed.
"But you're a smart girl, and a good girl, and I know you'll never do something like that again."
I shook my head. "Uh-uh."
Uncle Sam came out to the hallway and glanced in at us. "Just going out to the car," he said.
"Now, we're going to practice blockin' other's energies," Missouri said briskly, "You need to think of an image that you can call up right quick, so that you can put it in your mind and keep it there."
"Can it be the flower?" I asked.
She nodded. "That's fine. So what you want to do, is keep that in your mind when you're about ready to touch someone, if you know it's going to happen."
"Missouri, how come sometimes I see something when I touch someone and sometimes I don't?" I asked.
"Well, this is what happens. It all depends on focus and concentration, not just yours, but the other person's, see? Think about what happens when you meet someone- the both of you are focused on shakin' hands and being pleasant and learning about the other person. So you're both sending and receiving energy. Then when you touch it's like the energy gets sent back and forth. On the other hand, when you take your daddy's hand when you're crossing the street, you're concentrating on crossing the street, not on him, so you don't get anything from him. Does that make sense?"
"Yeah," I said, " 'Cause I don't ever see things when I hold hands with Daddy or Uncle Sam like that."
"And at the same time, they're concentrating on something else, too, not sending their energy out, so they aren't gonna be sending you anything to see."
"Right!" I agreed, "I wondered why I didn't see something every time, I thought maybe it was because something was wrong with me."
She chuckled. "No, honey, don't ever think that. Everyone's abilities are different and unique to themselves, and you can't ever judge yourself by anyone else. That's the beauty of these gifts, they're as different as each of us on this earth, and that's to be celebrated," she turned to me, "So, I want you to hold that picture of the flower in your mind now, and you try to keep it there."
I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, imagining the aster. She took my hand, and then I saw the butterfly bush out back.
I opened my eyes and dropped her hand.
"All right, try again, honey," she said.
I took another deep breath, and held her hand. This time I saw a big pot on her stove.
"Don't get upset now, you're learning," she said. We took a couple of cleansing breaths together. I gritted my teeth when I closed my eyes, and when I took her hand I felt her move back.
"Ooh, child, not so hard!" she dropped my hand and chuckled. I opened my eyes and she was rubbing her forehead. "You blocked me all right, you sent me that image loud and clear that time!"
"I did? I blocked you?"
She nodded, "You did, sweetie, great job. Let's keep on."
We practiced a couple more times, and each time I was successful at blocking her. I was able to keep the image of the flower in my head the while time.
"All right, now we do a test. And after that I think it's time for a break. Come with me," she said. I followed her back into the other room.
Daddy and Uncle Sam were sitting on either side of Grandpa John on a sofa. I walked over and sat next to Daddy.
"I need one of you take her hand, and send her an image. Dean, think of something." Missouri instructed.
Daddy took my hand, and she said, "Close your eyes, both of you, and Dean, you think hard on that image."
After a moment, I opened my eyes.
"Well?" Missouri asked.
"I just saw the flower," I said.
"What were you thinking about?" Missouri looked at Daddy.
"Uh, the tool kit in the trunk of the car," Daddy replied sheepishly.
"No, that's good, that's not something she'd think of normally," Missouri said, "and you blocked it! Wonderful!" She looked at all of us, "I'm gonna go heat up the food now."
"Look, Missouri," Grandpa John stood up and walked over to her, handing her two photographs.
"Oh, would you look at that," she said, shaking her head. She looked at me. "This lil' girl is the spittin' image of her."
"What is it?" I asked.
Grandpa John showed me. One of the photos was my school photo from kindergarten- my hair had been white blonde back then and past my shoulders, pinned back with little barrettes. The other photo was a black and white photo of a little girl with white blonde hair, wearing a little blouse with a curved collar, and her hair was also pinned back with little bows. Our hair was styled almost exactly the same and we had the same smile, and our heads were even tilted the same way.
"That's Mary in First Grade, I think," he told me.
"Wow," I said. I looked at him. "Where- where did you get my picture?"
"I brought some in, I wanted to compare," Uncle Sam said. He was holding one of my photo albums. I noticed a photo of my mommy holding me when I was a baby, and I started to cry.
"Why'd you have to bring that in?" I asked, turning away and putting my hands up to my face.
"Oh, sweetie, it's all right," Missouri said, "It's All Soul's Day, you can honor your mama and talk about her or cry about her if you want."
Daddy came over to me and picked me up. "It's all right, baby, go ahead and cry," he said gently.
A longing swept over me, and I started crying harder. "I—miss- her!" I heaved out, "Why'd- she—have—to-die?"
Daddy hugged me tightly. "I know, baby, I know," he said, and there were tears in his voice. He walked over and sat down on the sofa next to Grandpa John, and held me while I cried. It felt like I cried for a long time.
"I know we don't talk about your mom at all, I just wasn't sure if you were ready to," Daddy said gently, "I know you have a lot of emotions about everything that happened, and I worry that I'm not doing the right thing by not talking about it. Do you want to talk to someone about what happened?"
"What do you mean?" I sniffled and looked at him, "Who would I talk to?"
"A therapist," Daddy said, "A doctor who helps you talk about things that happened and feelings and- stuff like that."
"No, I don't want to talk to a stranger," I said.
"Well, honey, you can keep talkin' to me if you want, all right?" Missouri said, and smiled, "I'll put some coffee on while I'm heating up the food," She left the room.
Daddy gave me a bandana from his pocket and I wiped my tears off of my face. Then Grandpa John showed me some of the photos from the box. Some of them had burnt edges and some were folded and slightly torn.
There was a photo of Grandpa John dressed in a green outfit, wearing a hat, and Mary wearing a blue dress, and they were standing in front of Baby. There was another photo of them in a yard, with a little boy and a baby, and a big tree in the background.
"That's the front yard of the house where we- lived," Grandpa John told me, "Dean loved to try and climb that tree. Mary always panicked and worried that he'd fall and break something. I'd take him out there and lift him up into the lowest branches and let him climb around a little," he chuckled and shook his head, looking at Daddy, "One time you got kinda high up, and it took a while to coax you back down. Mary came out and saw what I was doing and boy, she got mad at me, gave me one of the worst tongue- lashings she ever gave me," he smiled ruefully, "I slept on the sofa for a couple of nights after that."
"She yelled at you and made you sleep on the sofa?" Daddy looked back at him, "You always made it seem like your marriage was perfect."
"Well, we had our times," Grandpa John said, "She could be—somewhat overprotective when it came to you boys, was really worried about you getting hurt and didn't want any rough-housing at first. I had to convince her that little boys actually benefit from rough-housing and physical play. She'd get pretty stern with me about it."
Missouri came to the door. "Let's eat, y'all," she motioned to us. We followed her into the kitchen, and she served the jambalaya and the red beans and rice. She had a plate of sausage she said was called kielbasa that could be mixed in with either dish. I tried some and it wasn't spicy, so I added some to my bowl of red beans and rice.
"Daddy, you need to learn how to make this, it's good," I told him.
"Well, I'll give y'all my recipe, but you have to hold on to it, it's been passed down in my family through the generations," Missouri said. She placed mugs of coffee on the table and a small pitcher of milk and a sugar bowl.
Then she sat down and said, "John, I know you had asked about the possibility of someone messin' with Charlie's mind, and I can tell you that that did happen. That witch that y'all were investigating- she was able to send herself into Charlie's dream and give her the ideas about finding the grimoire and doing that spell. And Charlie's aunt was in on it, she visited that witch and paid her off."
"Son of a bitch, I knew it!" Daddy muttered.
"Is there anything we can do to protect Charlie from something like this happening again?" Grandpa John asked.
"Yes, I can give y'all some prayers of protection, and there's some other things I can do too."
Uncle Sam took a drink of his coffee. "Why are Charlie's abilities becoming stronger?"
"Well, she's in the best health she's ever been in, and physically she's strong now too. She's like an engine running at peak performance. Also sometimes when you go through a trauma, such as Charlie went through with the changeling, it can open up the doors in your mind to make your abilities more powerful. So right now she's got a lot goin' for her," Missouri smiled at me, "and she's doing so well with everything we're doing. How are you feelin', honey?"
"I'm kinda tired," I said.
"Would you like to go lay down for a while? I've got some things I want to talk to your family about."
"O-okay," I said, feeling a little uncertain.
"Are you finished eating, or do you want more?"
"I'm done," I said. She stood up and I took my bowl over to the sink and rinsed it out.
Daddy reached for me as I walked by the table and pulled me into a hug. "Have a good nap," he said.
Uncle Sam and Grandpa John hugged me too, and Grandpa John ruffled my hair as he let me go.
I followed Missouri upstairs to a small bedroom with dark wood furniture in it. The bed had a thick quilt on it and big fluffy pillows.
"Those men sure do love you a lot, I'm so glad ya'll found each other," she said, "You've needed a lot of love, and they needed someone to give all the love they've been hiding inside." She pulled the quilt down and patted the pillows. I took my shoes off and climbed into the bed, and she tucked me in, and then walked over to the window and pulled the blind down.
"You rest as long as you need, and then we'll see how you feel about doing some more work later, all righty?"
"M'kay," I murmured, feeling sleepy. I was curious and wanted to look around at the stuff in the room, but my eyes were heavy and I couldn't stay awake.