A/N: Ah god. I ain't even. I ain't even!

Please accept my humblest apologies and this longer-than-the-distance-from-the-Earth-to-the-Moon-in-word-count chapter.

Chapter 9: The Apricot Jam Conundrum

'So, what's the deal with you and Millennia?' Jack asked ten minutes later as they sat in the waiting room, ready to be called in for the Doctor's first familiarisation session. Leah and Theo were running around somewhere nearby, and the waiting room was nearly empty.

'Mmm?' the Doctor asked in a tone that distinctly meant he didn't want to have a conversation about it.

Jack ignored the rather obvious hint. 'I couldn't work it out.'

'Work out what?'

'Y'know, whether she wanted to kiss you or not.'

The Doctor sighed. 'Look, I knew her a very long time ago. A time I did something extremely stupid.'

'Yeah?'

The Doctor glanced around for Leah and Theo, but they were out of hearing range. He leant in, conspiratorial. '... Back in the Academy, me, Rallon, and Millennia heard about the realm of the Celestial Toymaker - a sort of God and a Guardian of Time - and we fancied ourselves as being able to take him on. To cut a long story short, I was the only one who got home to Gallifrey.'

'Oh. What happened?'

'We were utterly beaten. The Celestial Toymaker used Rallon's body as a new host and took Millennia prisoner. I was put on trial and expelled from the academy, Rallon and Millennia were wiped from the Time Lord records.'

'Geez,' Jack muttered. 'But you went back?'

'I got called back. I ended up destroying the Toymaker's realm … and I thought Rallon and Millennia with it. I thought I'd killed her.'

'You think it might be her, then?' Jack wondered.

The Doctor paused, thinking about that. 'I don't know. She acts like her. Talks like her. Looks like her. She's got her memories.'

'And her story?'

'Improbable, but not impossible.'

'We know Rose was here. She could've set it all up.'

'I've never told Rose about Rallon or Millennia in that much detail,' the Doctor replied. 'There's no way the Lanwa's could know this much, much less recreate a pretty perfect version of her.'

'Anywhere it might have got the information? Maybe it talked to Brax?'

'Brax wouldn't know. Only people who'd vaguely know would be my old companions, but they never met Millennia either.'

Jack paused for a brief moment, thinking about that. '... Sounds to me like she's the real deal.'

The Doctor paused, chewing his lip as he mentally ran through the facts of what they'd discussed. 'Really does, doesn't it?'

Any further conversation was suddenly interrupted when the door of the therapy room suddenly opened to reveal a tall alien in a pristine silver uniform, holding a datapad. 'Doctor?' he asked, looking around at the few people in the waiting room.

The Doctor stood up, Jack yelling out for Leah and Theo as they all gathered to make their way into the room. The therapist gestured for the Doctor to take a seat on the examination table as Jack and the kids congregated next to him.

'Today is about the initial boot up of the exotronic,' the therapist told him. 'We'll try and master basic movements, and then get you back in the rejuvenation chamber to help heal the flesh on your arm.'

'Gotcha,' the Doctor replied as the therapist checked the exotronic, scanning it and prodding it.

'Looks like its taken very well to your arm,' he commented. 'Any discomfort?'

'Just a bit itchy at the moment,' the Doctor replied.

'Good,' the therapist said, and made a couple of notes on its datapad. 'Try to resist scratching it, as it can delay the healing process.' He examined a little more. 'Well, it's looking very good, you have above average healing rates. Ready to turn it on?'

'Yep.'

The therapist nodded. 'When I switch on the exotronic, there will be a small adjustment phase,' he said. 'It will take a few moments to attune to your sensory controls. Usually in this moment, the exotronic can move strangely and independently of you.'

'Got it,' the Doctor said, nodding. 'I'm ready.'

'Switching on the exotronic in three … two … one …'

The therapist pressed the button on the exotronic. The diodes on the device burst into light, flashing orange like a rebooted router struggling to find a connection. For a moment nothing happened, before the entire exotronic suddenly came to life with an almighty electronic screech and surge of power.

'Watch out!' the Doctor yelped as his arm flew up to the left of its own accord, narrowly missing smacking Jack in the face.

'Jesus Christ!' Jack yelped, only just about ducking in time. He took the kids with him to dive under a nearby desk for shelter as the Doctor's rogue fist clenched and the arm charged forward like Superman, dragging the Time Lord's helpless body behind it to slam straight into the opposing wall with tremendous force, leaving a significant fist-shaped dent in the metal.

The arm didn't stop - it continued to have a complete mind of its own as it rapidly spun the Doctor around in a circle and then charged forward to make him crash into a table of medical instruments. He was about to fall over, but the sheer power of the exotronic hauled him upright, rapidly spun him around again and started waving back and forth so erratically it nearly dislocated his shoulder. It abruptly stopped waving and promptly charged into another wall with the fingers extended, piercing into the metal several inches to embed itself.

It tried to pull itself away, but the exotronic had firmly got itself stuck, and was still trying to move despite this. The Doctor channeled every ounce of concentration he could to the device, desperately trying to gain control of his rogue limb. Eventually he managed to wrangle it, and the exotronic stopped moving.

'I think I've got it!' the Doctor panted while trying to extract his hand out of the wall, but it refused to budge.

'I've never seen such an extreme boot-up!' the therapist squeaked, emerging cautiously from behind a screen.

'Lucky me,' the Doctor supposed, and gestured to his arm. 'Any help?'

The therapist moved over and carefully pulled the arm out. The Doctor was concentrating very hard to keep it under control as the exotronic was freed, and the therapist took a nervous step back.

'Try not to focus on moving it,' the therapist advised him. 'Let it operate subconsciously.'

'You sure about that?' Jack asked, still hiding under the table with the kids.

The Doctor did what he was told and tried not to think about it. His arm spasmed a few times with a kind of contained wild energy, but eventually it seemed to relax and hang by his side as the exotronic adjusted to the signals of his somatic system.

'Can we come out yet?' Leah asked.

The Doctor cautiously moved back to sit on the examination table again, keeping his eyes transfixed on the exotronic. It stayed still. 'It's stopped.'

The three of them emerged from under the desk, but Jack kept the kids at a distance as the therapist moved forward and scanned the exotronic.

'All systems functioning, you should be able to start controlling it now,' he said. 'Try raising your arm.'

The Doctor did, and promptly his arm moved up.

'Clench your fist and unclench it,' the therapist ordered.

The Doctor did. It worked flawlessly.

'Wow,' Jack muttered. 'That's incredible. You're still paralysed but you're moving it.'

'What does it feel like?' Leah wondered.

'It's just moving like a normal arm except I can't feel it,' the Doctor told her.

'Raise your hand again for me,' the therapist said, jotting down some notes.

The Doctor did.

'Now bring down each digit in turn.'

The Doctor did as ordered, curling in each finger and his thumb individually until he had a fist again.

'Now wiggle your fingers.'

He wiggled them. The therapist looked very impressed. 'Try catching this ball,' the therapist said, and threw a small foam red ball to his hand.

The Doctor caught it without thinking about it, stunning himself slightly with the precision of the exotronic's movement and some slight sensation on the tips of the fingers. 'I feel that,' he said, staring at the ball held in his fingers.

'What?' Leah asked, wide-eyed.

'I can't feel the texture or the weight, but I know something's there.'

'Sensors on the exotronic tips should go directly to your brain,' the therapist said. 'You won't be able to feel the rest of it but the fingertips should register basic pressure.' He jotted down some more notes. 'I've never known a patient and an exotronic to work so well together so quickly. I don't usually do this for a few sessions, but …' He put a small pin on the table by the Doctor. 'Try picking that up.'

He did, absolutely perfectly.

'This is incredible,' the therapist said, smiling broadly. 'Usually getting to this stage should take weeks.' He brought out a couple of metal cups next, placing them on the table. 'Take hold of a cup.'

The Doctor reached forward to take the metal cup. It immediately crushed in his misjudged and highly powerful grip. 'Oh, sorry.'

'The exotronic's strength can be a little hard to fathom at first as you have no sense of texture, resistance, or weight,' the therapist said. 'Try again.'

The Doctor put down the destroyed cup, and tried the second one. This time he didn't crush it, holding it delicately.

'Good job,' the therapist commented.

'How powerful is it?' Jack wondered.

'56 garks lifting weight and 900 cdi,' the therapist replied.

'Wow,' Jack murmured, stunned.

'What's that mean?' Leah asked.

'It means he could lift an African Elephant and crush a diamond at the same time,' Jack translated.

'Wow!' Leah echoed, and then slowly frowned. '... Why would you do that?'

The Doctor grinned, putting down the cup and flexing his metal-coated fingers again as Theo broke free of his uncle and jogged to his dad.

'Careful,' Jack warned the boy. Theo ignored him, and reached up to his daddy with his hand outstretched. The Doctor considered him, and then cautiously reached out to place his fingertips on his son's tiny ones. They met in a gentle connection.

The exotronic pulsed lightly, and the Doctor blinked in surprise. 'My arm warmed.'

'The exotronic warms when you come into contact with organic matter,' the therapist told him. It's a sort of warning that you're touching something that can be hurt or potentially delicate so requires less grip strength. Once you're fully integrated then you will be able to turn that setting off.'

'I like it,' the Doctor confessed. 'Think I'll keep it as it is.'

The therapist then handed him a small device that looked a little bit like a mobile phone with added LED lights. 'This is your MCU - your Mobile Control Unit. It has all the settings menus, such as a simple reboot, a system cleaner, sensitivity adjustment, you can invert the Y axis movement if you prefer, emergency shutdown, and if you feel it's out of sync you can recalibrate it. There's also a menu for macroing, so you pre-program repetitive movements and execute them automatically, as well as a remote control.'

'Yeah, but can he change the colour of the lights?' Jack joked.

'That too,' the therapist confirmed. 'Also there are pre-programmed gestures for communication in six million non-verbal languages.'

'Jesus Christ,' Jack muttered.

'What are the limits?' the Doctor asked.

'The exotronic will fail in temperatures below 675 and above 786 gacions, and cannot be submerged in liquid for more than ten hours. Also any form of electrocution or other dangerous conditions. Nothing extreme will happen, it will just shut itself down until it senses a normal environment again. This prevents any permanent damage.'

The Doctor nodded, just before his arm suddenly beeped and dropped abruptly with the lights turning red, nearly causing him to fall off the table with the force. He couldn't move it.

'What happened?' Leah asked.

'Out of power,' the Doctor replied.

'Yes, it will need recharging,' the therapist said.

'How long does a charge last?' Jack wondered.

'It depends on how much it's used, but with moderate everyday movement that's not strenuous, it will last for up to two weeks,' the therapist said. 'It uses a sonic-charged battery but will plug into all of the most common plugs. You'll be provided with a wireless universal plug adaptor for that.'

'Okay,' the Doctor said.

'What happens next?' Jack asked.

'Next we'll get your flesh healed, and I'll schedule you in for regular rehabilitation sessions over the next few days so you can master its use. But at your speed, I don't think it'll take too long,' the therapist said.

'Long day?' the Doctor supposed.

'A few hours. Let me get the regenerator,' the therapist said, and left into an adjoining room.

The Doctor glanced at everyone else. 'You don't have to hang around for this bit. But thank you for coming.'

Jack nodded. 'We'll go have some fun. Kids?'

Leah nodded, but Theo rapidly waddled to his dad. 'I stay,' he said hugging the bigger gallifreyan's leg.

'You sure? It'll be boring,' the Doctor told him.

'I stay,' Theo repeated.

Jack shrugged. 'Fine, we'll see you guys later. Leah, you coming?'

She nodded, hurriedly hugging her dad's leg goodbye before taking Jack's hand and dragging him out the door.

'Bye!' Jack only just managed to get out before the door closed behind them. Leah let go of his hand. 'Right, if you're okay, I'll see you later, have fun and-'

Jack was suddenly interrupted by the little girl jumping in front of him and throwing up her hand in a halting gesture. 'No, Uncle Jack, you gotta come with me.'

'What? Why?' Jack asked, puzzled.

'I need your help.'

Leah had dragged him by the hand to the lift, and Panacea seemed to know where she wanted to go without Leah even saying. On exiting the lift, she led her uncle in the library, through the maze of people towards one of the reading pods where the door swooshed closed and she programmed on the computer to retrieve a specific book.

'What're we doing?' Jack asked as a large, dusty, thick book materialised into existence on the desk. 'I'm not a big reader, y'know.'

'D'you know where the Tuvala System is?' she asked, rifling through the book.

'The what?'

'Tuvala. T-U-V-A-L-A.'

'Sorry kid, never heard of it,' Jack apologised, shrugging.

Leah sighed, disappointed as she suddenly stopped looking through the book. 'Okay, don't worry. You can go,' she said, promptly curling up on the chair and hugging her knees.

Jack frowned. 'Why are you asking?'

She paused, clearly for a moment trying to make a decision. Whatever it was, it was quite clearly too hard for her not to tell him as she nodded, and sat up to continue going through the book. 'I did loads and loads of research and I found this.' She settled on a certain page, and then scanned down with a finger and eventually pointed at a particularly long paragraph. 'Read it.'

Jack regarded the massive paragraph filled with tiny alien writings that the TARDIS - still sitting in the dock 4.2 astronomical units away - was slightly too distant to fully translate for him. 'I can't read it. Tell me.'

'Um, it's a medical journal with a case study of Lanwa's disease where the host survived.'

Jack's eyes bolted open, his heart skipping a beat. 'You're kidding. What does it says happened?'

'He went somewhere called the Tuvala System to a shrine and it says he was healed.'

Jack stared at the book, then at her. 'Where in the Tuvala System?'

'I dunno, I've looked everywhere but this is all I found,' she said, and handed a photo over to him. On it was a face-on picture of an old, ancient-looking shrine in carved stone set in a lush green and bountiful landscape. It still looking grand and glorious despite its ravished state, with pieces falling off and moss growing up the sides. Written in the top corner in six-year-old Leah's curiously neat writing were the digits 70-0045:C.

'Galactic co-ordinates?' Jack supposed.

'Yeah, but it's not long enough, there should be more,' Leah replied. 'I was hoping you'd know.'

'You said he was cured there? How?'

She nodded. 'I dunno how, I was thinking maybe it was something in the air or maybe something's there like a plant. All it says is he went there, then when he came back he was fine and that the Lanwa's had disappeared, and he said it was at that shrine.'

'So, it's a definite cure,' Jack surmised, and then heard what he'd just said and grinned widely. 'Who cares where it is, it's a cure! You've done it! You've saved her!'

He stooped down and swept the little girl up in a bone-crunching hug. She laughed, caught up in his excitement before he landed her back on two feet, and she promptly looked confused.

'Umm, but if we don't know where it is, how can I research it?' she pointed out.

'Research,' Jack repeated, grinning. 'If your dad could hear you. We'll find out where it is and go - that's simple.'

'How?'

'Who's the first person you ask when you want to know anything about everything?'

'Um, Daddy,' she supposed. 'But we can't.'

'Why not?'

'Cos he's busy getting better.'

Jack laughed. 'Leah, he'll want to know this. You've done the hard work for him. He'll know where the Tuvala System is - guaranteed. We go and swipe this cure; give it to your mum; done. Just gotta wait for him to get out of his session.'

Leah looked a little unsure for a moment, but eventually relented and nodded, beaming. 'Okay!'

Having spent his last few hours sitting still and being poked and prodded by medical staff and machines alike, the Doctor was relieved to finally return to their living quarters with Theo in tow. The operation was still taking its toll - his arm wasn't hurting so much anymore, but everything else felt like he'd just woken up the morning after going ten rounds with Mike Tyson.

Theo ran off to retrieve a game for them to play as he promptly collapsed into the nearest chair and waited, leaving him with his thoughts.

You're an idiot.

'Thank you for your input,' the Doctor murmured to his increasingly annoying subconscious, which still insisted on using Rose's voice.

You risked everythin' for that. I'd never have let you do this. Please admit it. You have no idea how to save me. You've got no idea where to start. So forget me, go on and live your life.

'I'm not doing it without you. That's not how it works,' he muttered. 'I'll find a way. So shut up.'

There was a pause.

It was painfully silent.

These past few years, he'd become far too used to the constant noise of people around him. He'd spent so long being on his own that to suddenly have that, had at first been bewildering, and now he realised couldn't live without it.

'I'm sorry,' he found himself suddenly saying. 'Please stay with me.'

Apologisin' to yourself?

She was laughing.

I'm not actually Rose y'know, in case you're gettin' confused.

He smiled a little. 'Yes. Yes, I am.'

So, are you gonna go to the Celene and see Millennia? You've been thinkin' about her all day.

'I don't know. Probably. Maybe. Eventually.'

His conversation with his subconscious was suddenly interrupted by Theo running back in, holding Leah's prized and deeply loved cuddly toy rabbit, Floppy, and - somewhat bizarrely - a jar of Waitrose Apricot Jam.

The Doctor frowned. 'Um, where did you get …?'

'We goin' play the F'oppy Dunk game! I jus' made it,' Theo interrupted him, clearly very happy and incredibly proud.

The Doctor's eyebrows lowered. 'Can't say I've heard of that one.'

'Um, easy,' the little boy said, and held up the rabbit by one arm. 'F'oppy.' He then held up the jam. 'Dunk.'

The Doctor swore he could almost see a thin veil of terror in poor Floppy's beady black eyes. 'Err, okay,' he said, getting up to rescue Floppy from the insane toddler he'd created and carefully placing her on the table, far, far away from the apricot jam. 'Ooor … how about I Spy?'

The door suddenly whizzed open in a hurried shriek and Jack and Leah rushed in with a whirl of energy.

'Hey Doc, ever heard of the Tuvala System?' Jack asked, breathless.

'Err, it's an area of split space somewhere between Hynaxia and the Dagmar Cluster. Why are you …?'

'What's split space?' Leah asked keenly.

'Well, it's a region of space that's had so much damage done to it, that the entirety of space-time in that area has quite literally been shattered or destroyed.'

'By damage, you mean …'

'War and weapons, yeah,' the Doctor confirmed. 'Weapons so destructive that they blow a hole in the universe. There's quite a few areas of split space scattered around, I tend to just avoid them.'

'So never been to a place like that?' Jack asked.

The Doctor shook his head. 'Not much point. They're usually flooded with gravitational and time distortions, unreality pockets and psychosis-inducing icaron particles, and loads of other really unpleasant things - most of which we don't even know about. Not much can safely pass through it, and there's nothing to see there, either. Completely inhospitable and fairly inaccessible. Impossible to navigate safely. Everything's dead inside it, and everything that comes out of it is never the same again. Why, is it important?'

Everyone fell silent. Suddenly Leah erupted into tears, grabbed Floppy, and ran out of the room.

'Leah!?' the Doctor cried and made after her, but Jack grabbed his arm to stop him.

'What? Get off!' the Doctor complained, trying to pull away.

'She found the cure for Rose.'

That stopped the Doctor dead in his protests as he stared at Jack, stunned. 'Wait. What?'

'She researched her little heart out, Doc, and she found it. One case study in one book in billions. It's in the Tuvala System at this shrine.' He produced the photo of the shrine and handed it over. The Doctor looked at it, and then at him, stupefied.

'She's found the cure?' he managed.

'Definitely. It's there, Doc. Absolutely positive.'

The Doctor looked at the photo again, and then frowned. 'Wait. She's found the cure. Why is she crying?'

'Err, probably because you just told her that it's in a completely inaccessible and deadly no access kinda place?' Jack supposed.

'Oh.'

Jack let go of his arm, which dropped to his side limply. There was an excruciatingly long pause.

'What're you gonna tell her?' Jack asked.

The Doctor pursed his lips, puckering them before looking back at Jack with a decisive, electric glint in his eye that Jack had seen all too regularly before. 'That we're going to find this shrine and save her mum.'

Still clutching the picture of the shrine, the Doctor gently knocked on Leah's door.

'Leah?' he asked. There was no reply, asides from the sound of sobbing. 'Leah, can I come in?'

She didn't answer. He opened the door slowly, and found her sitting cross-legged on the bed hugging Floppy, crying.

'Leah,' he started.

'I'm ... s-sorry,' she sobbed out through her tears.

He considered her briefly, his hearts simultaneously breaking at the sight of her crying. 'What for?' he asked, moving forward to kneel in front of her.

'I w-wanted to … to g-get everything back to … to how it used t-t-o b-be b-but now I … I made it w-worse.'

'No, no, no, no,' the Doctor said quickly, moving in to take one of her little hands in his own, squeezing it reassuringly. 'You found the cure. There's nothing bad about that at all. This is amazing. This would've taken me weeks to find. You're incredible.'

'We c-can't get there though, c-can w-we?' she sobbed, tears pouring down her face and dripping off of her chin. 'You s-said we … that we can't g-go into … split … split space.'

'Leah, you really should know I have a long and very embarrassing 900 years history of saying things can't be done and then them happening three seconds later. I'll figure out a way. All it is is a couple of obstacles - time distortions won't be a problem that's for sure. Yes, there are lots of other things but I'll figure out a way to handle them. We've got the Tardis, and that's a brilliant start. Just you watch me. I promise I'll sort this. Okay?'

She just sniffed, clearly not convinced.

He took her face in both hands, forcing her to look at him. 'Trust me. Please. When have I ever let you down?'

Leah's slightly confused expression rapidly reminded the Time Lord of many previous atrocities he'd committed in this still fairly new father-daughter relationship that he was struggling to completely get to grips with.

'Okay, sorry, stupid question,' he admitted. 'I know I've not always kept my promises, and I know I've let you down before, and I'm so, so sorry.'

She sniffed. He persisted.

'Leah - I'm still as confused as the day you were born. I've had nearly seven years of being in a completely useless state, ambling around in the dark trying desperately to make you think I'm worthy enough to be your friend. Along the way I've done some very stupid things, I know. But this time it's a proper promise. I will find a way. I'll save Mum, bring her back to us, and everything will be just like it used to be. Us four together. Can you trust me?'

Still crying, she nodded. He pulled her into a hug, daring to use his new metal arm to hold her. His entire arm warmed at the touch, activated by the touch of contact with organic life.

'I love you,' he murmured with his eyes closed.

'I love you too, Daddy,' Leah replied.

Eventually he pulled back, kissing her forehead. 'Want dinner?'

She smiled, her eyes still a bit red and puffy. 'Yeah.'

'Okay, I'll get everyone ready and I'll meet you in the main room in five minutes,' the Doctor ordered. 'Then we'll find some food and I'll tell you all about the time me and Donna went to Las Vegas, where the bargaining chips were alive and ate one of the croupiers.'

She giggled while simultaneously shaking her head in disbelief, before jumping off the bed and running to the bathroom.

Don't have clue how you're gonna get into split space, are you?

He sighed. 'Nope,' he muttered, and left to find Jack and Theo.