A/N: P3 fans, you should know what happens after the Kyoto trip.
This chapter is a bit experimental, a lot actually.
"There's only one, but…" Inside Juno, Fuuka furrowed her eyebrows. "I thought she was in the hospital…"
Junpei widened his eyes. "She's… not?" But, but what? Where? Why?
While everyone was wondering that, Fuuka cried out and clutched her own head. "She's… she's inside!"
Fuuka screamed. SEES looked at each other. No one knew what was happening or what to do. Soon, Fuuka went quiet, and everything was reduced to silence.
"... Long time no see."
"Chidori?" Junpei asked. It was her voice, instead of Fuuka, in his head.
"I can't stand the sight of you all anymore. So, I've decided to do something about it. You know where. Come to me..."
Fuuka collapsed on her knees. She touched her head and groaned. The rest were talking, so they all heard her, discussing what to do, planning a team to deal with the escaped member of Strega. Chidori, why? Be careful, they said. It's Strega. It's a trap. Why Chidori?
"Hey Junpei, do you know what's going on?"
Junpei was clenching his fists. She really escaped? She left the hospital. Chidori, why did you...?
"Junpei!" Yukari repeated.
"No, damn it! I have no idea!" Junpei snapped. Chidori left. That's declaring war with SEES! Whatever that's better than this was too late. They're enemies now. "Damn it, damn it…!"
"Junpei, wait!"
Junpei ran out the door. It's his fault. She was unhappy. Just when he thought he had a chance to convince her, to leave Strega, to stay...?
"Chidori! What's going on? Why are you doing this?"
Standing in front of Tartarus, Chidori frowned.
"It doesn't make any sense!" Junpei shouted. "I mean, I know I'm not that smart, and I've done a lot of stupid stuff, but-"
"Junpei, move!"
He managed to dodge the axe that almost cut his head half open. Chidori pulled the chain and the axe was back in her hand. Why, why why why? He could see it and he could guess, but why?
"Get back, Junpei! It's useless trying to reason with her!"
"It's too dangerous! I know how you feel, Junpei-kun! But please, just back up!"
Chidori pointed the Evoker at her head. "Medea."
Junpei backed away, or was he dragged back? and let his friends fought her, to calm her down or whatever. No, he didn't get it. They didn't need to. This fight shouldn't happen. It's just… It isn't right. Junpei had tuned out the fight, but her voice remained loud and clear to him.
"I don't belong here. I… I've always known that."
And Junpei couldn't find the courage to tell her wrong, to shout it out loud that he had always been there and did she not think the same?
"Why? Why won't you leave me alone? I just don't get it, Junpei..."
I don't get it either...
When Medea faded and Chidori closed her eyes, Junpei ran to her side and caught her before she fell.
"I told you…" Chidori pushed him away. "Don't touch me."
"Chidori, please, tell me." Junpei knelt down to her level. "Why are you doing this?" Why all of this have to happen. Why can't it be like before, when I visited you every day and talked and made you smile? "Why...?"
"Because I am in pain…"
It was barely a whisper, meant only for Junpei to hear.
"You brought me pain, Junpei. Pain that I didn't want. Pain that I never asked for." Chidori shook her head. "It's painful to be happy only for the moment. I don't like pain. I want it away. And before I know it, I'm in fear..."
"Huh?" Junpei wanted to hug her right now. He held himself back.
"When I'm with you, Junpei. I fear everything. I fear loss. I fear death. I fear that my time with you will end. That's why I…" Chidori looked down. "I'm sorry. If I could turn back time, I wouldn't have..."
"Chidori…?"
The Tartarus doors were swung opened from the inside, and there they were, Takaya and Jin.
"I can't believe that you would choose betrayal." Takaya clicked his tongue. "I had hoped you would see the light. Instead, you've been poisoned by them... You're no longer one of us."
Junpei stood up. "What the hell does that mean? She's your teammate!" These people didn't deserve Chidori at all. Just use her and throw her away like this? She didn't have anywhere else...
So Junpei made up his mind.
"Chidori, don't stay with them. Come with me. I'll protect you with my life!"
Chidori looked up, there was hope in her eyes, and Junpei smiled back. She's now the same person that was in the hospital, the one that spent time with him and smiled and just be happy. She was an enemy but she was his friend. He knew he wouldn't regret it and that he would find a way.
There was a gunshot.
Junpei wasn't sure what had happened or where, or who? Shinjiro's last moment flashed across his eyes. What a weird thing to be thinking about now… Everyone looked so shocked, and he was confused. What was it that brought him the burning pain in his chest? That slowed the world down and pushed blood up to his mouth when he breathes?
It was hot. It burned, but the whole world was cold and slipping...
And as he fell down to the floor, it didn't feel like much, only a blur of many things that normally wouldn't blend into one, emotions or thoughts or sound, the green sky and a small hand on his chest. He looked into her eyes. He felt cold and weak but he knew he must not die... Her eyes were too sad...
"Jun… pei…"
…
I want to be with you, Junpei. Forever.
That's why this is how it should be.
You can't die here, Junpei.
...
Junpei gasped, surprised that he was breathing. Pain, he expected pain, a lot of pain but there was none, only the comforting warmth. He found himself smiling from the vague dream that surely was pleasant.
"Junpei-kun!"
"Junpei!"
The sky was green. It was still the dark hour. Junpei sat up. His shirt was torn and soaked with blood, but there's no wound, no pain. His heart was beating, and in that moment he thought he was the luckiest person in the world. He was saved. She saved him. She had saved his life, Chidori, Chidori.
"It worked." Chidori whispered, her voice so quiet, and she ended it with a faint smile. "I did it…"
"Chidori!" Junpei caught her yet again that night.
This one felt a lot heavier in his arms.
"I can hear the life pulsing through you…" Chidori placed her hand on his chest and giggled. "Now I will live inside you, and we'll be together... forever."
"Wh-what're you saying?" Junpei choked. He knew exactly what was implied. He just knew. He felt it in his body.
"I'll protect you..."
"I, I'll protect you too!" Junpei held her hand and it was shaking. "So, so please…"
Chidori reached out to touch Junpei's cheek, the same hand that closed the hole in his chest. "This feels so nice..." Her finger lingered only for a few seconds before dropping back down to the floor. Junpei took that hand and squeezed it.
"Please, no. No. Chidori. Stay with me, Chidori, Chidori..."
"Always." Chidori smiled. "No regrets… Love you, Junpei. Thank you..."
Her hand stopped shaking. Her breathing stopped. A few seconds of silence.
Junpei held her hand and told himself it was still warm, and Chidori in his arms was warm, and his own body were warm. And she looked just like she was taking a light nap with that smile on her lips, but at the same time he could feel his heartbeat and the flame, it was her life and her power and he just knew.
This can't be happening…
"What a pity." Takaya was talking with that fake sympathy. "Such a meaningless death…"
"Meaningless?"
The air a moment ago ignited into power. Still holding Chidori with both of his arms, something snapped, like a bullet piercing through his head. Red like blood, red like her hair, red like the flame that they both used. Trismegistus was surrounded by flame. Her flame.
Jin staggered backward and hit the ground while screaming in pain. Takaya backed away as well. Junpei watched the fire burned. Their clothes were burning. That's Chidori's revenge. All for her. They have to pay, damn it. This is not enough.
SEES could see Jin holding Takaya back through the thick smoke, then a flash of light. By the time they could see anything again, the two Strega members were gone.
"STREGA, COME BACK HERE!"
"Junpei!" Yukari and the rest ran up to him.
Junpei looked up. "Can you hold her for me? I'll go after them!"
"No, Junpei-kun!" Fuuka gasped. "They just escaped. You can't be saying-"
"I'm not done! It can't end like this, it's unfair!" Junpei shouted. "I, I have to! They-"
"She entrusted you with this life!" Akihiko said.
Junpei froze.
Life. Heat. The weight.
He became aware of the weight in his arms.
"Don't waste it..."
Junpei took a few deep breaths, caressing her arm with his thumb, his own hands were shaking. She was still warm but the heat was leaving her body. Even that couldn't stay with him. "Chidori, I… I…"
Junpei closed his eyes and brought her body closer to him.
"This is so hard. But… It's not just my life anymore."
Junpei lay her down on the floor and held her hand until she left completely, until he felt the warmth left under his grip. He let go of her cold hand and stood up, let himself looked at her, if it was too long his friends didn't mention it, and turned his back. Kirijo people would come to take her away to a good place, a nice place to rest filled with sunflowers. It was their job, nothing he could do anymore and so he walked back to the dorm and thought and thought of what she did, she gave him this life. Life...
The warmth lingered, and Junpei was being reminded of the weight with every single breath he took.
The career experience was uneventful for Minato. Soon, it was already Friday and Ryoji invited him for some burgers.
"Autumn is nice, but there're so many leaves to sweep," Ryoji said. "It's all red and orange and yellow all over the floor, you know?"
Minato nodded. He himself worked in this Wild Duck, but anyone would notice the fallen leaves everywhere they went. It's that time of year before the quiet winter.
"I was supposed to be in the same group as Junpei. He never appeared." Ryoji took a bite from his burger. "I called Junpei and he… didn't sound okay at all. Did something happen?"
Minato considered telling Ryoji the half-truth, that Chidori was missing from the hospital and she was now gone. He decided to be straightforward. "He lost someone important."
Ryoji slightly frowned. He began twirling the straw around in his drink. "People… die. I think that's something you have to accept."
Minato didn't say anything.
"I've never seen him like that. That's why I'm worried." Ryoji looked down. "But, what can we do? People die every day like the blowing of the wind, but of course, death would be different when it is close to you… I'm being too cold, aren't I?"
Some would say he never leave his room. That's not true, of course, he still had to use the bathroom, and he needed to eat something, and he needed the fresh air outside. The flame in him would die down if he didn't do any of that and he knew, he had to go through the motion to let that warmth stay.
Junpei waited for them to leave the dorm first before he came out of his room. He couldn't really avoid Koromaru but he didn't mind the dog. He walked around in the dorm and the dog followed. He took a shower sometimes and ate instant noodles, someone bought more for him, there were more cups than usual in the cupboard.
He did open the window and look outside. He also did open the door and look outside. He never stepped outside, but he could see the world that keep moving on without him or her. He saw the autumn leaves fell and scattered. Red, dying leaves that danced lively in the wind. Yellow ones had the same energy that gave the cut sunflowers some life again, the yellow glow that poured life over his gunshot wound. They would all disappear when the heat left the town and the cold winter took over.
Junpei was lying on his bed. It should be evening now. His friends had already gone into their rooms. It was earlier than usual so he bet it was the last day of that career thing, meaning it was Friday and… Damn, he wished he was born in America. They didn't have to go to school on Saturday. Could he push his luck and skip a day…?
"Iori, this is for you. It's from the hospital… I will leave it here."
There was a thud, and the footsteps faded.
Something left for him, from the hospital?
It might be more food. No, he had already eaten dinner. It was usually Yukari who left the dish, not Mitsuru. She said something about the hospital. It's not hospital food, is it? It could be a bottle of depressants, or maybe they gave him his flower vase back, the one he bought along with the sunflowers. He really couldn't guess what it was outside of his room and if Mitsuru didn't say anything then he didn't need to go get it. It could be anything random and nothing personal that would affect him in any way at all.
Who am I kidding...?
Junpei lay on the bed for a little longer, a few minutes or maybe seconds, he had no idea. He stood up, made his way to the door and opened it. As expected, there was a box in front of his room, a box of her belongings.
The flame flickered in the back of his mind.
He knelt down and simply stared at it, the door still ajar, the hallway brighter than his room. If he closed the door, would the box go away? Junpei didn't want that. He didn't want to bring it into his room either. Didn't want to deal with anything, he kept staring.
C'mon, snap outta this. It won't disappear or invite itself.
Junpei raised his arm and reached for the box, but he felt tired all of a sudden. His hand dropped back onto his thigh.
But it's just so hard...
The flame flickered again. Chidori, do you have something to say? Maybe she wanted me to check it… Chidori wouldn't mind if he looked, he hoped. Junpei was grateful his friends didn't snoop around and let him do it by himself. Yes, take all the time you need, at your own pace, when you feel like it...
The warmth comforted him, her life burning like a crackling fireplace. He took a deep breath and it fueled the fire even more.
"Hey, Junpei… What do you do to make yourself feel alive?"
"Uh, I dunno. Breathing I guess?"
Junpei knew he was right about that. After he had gathered enough energy, he grabbed the box with two hands, he grabbed it too tight, and stood up. He sat down on the edge of his bed with the box in his lap.
Junpei went through her items. He remembered every single one, a new sketchbook he had bought for her, colored pencils he had given her, with that letter, the chain attached to her axe, and two pieces of a cross dagger that seems to stick out of her head.
After putting everything back into the box, Junpei picked the sketchbook up. Chidori never let anyone look at her drawings, especially this new sketchbook. His fingertips were playing at the edge of the cover. After a while, Junpei opened the sketchbook to the first page.
Chidori hugged her sketchbook, hiding what she was drawing from his sight. "That's none of your business."
Junpei flipped the page. He widened his eyes. He started to flip pages after pages.
They were all portraits of him.
Some were detailed, some were quick sketches, but every single page was devoted to him without fail.
"Chidori…"
This sketchbook could be traced back to September. It was his third visit, maybe. He bought her the sketchbook because he thought the old one might be getting full, and being bored in the hospital seemed terrible. It was the same day Shinjiro visited and they saw Medea for the first time...
Chidori chuckled. "You're so weird, Junpei."
He reached the last page of the sketchbook, and again, he stared at the drawing, a detailed portrait of a man named Junpei Iori.
He was moved, more than moved. How could he explain that? He wanted to breathe, but he choked, so he tried again and his heart was pounding but in a good way.
Are you trying to tell me something, Chidori?
This man in the portrait was not too different from what he saw in the mirror, but the sketch had charms to it that even looking into a mirror couldn't replicate that effect. He could get that. His face in the mirror was miserable lately. Back then, he had been in a happy go lucky mode, unlike now. Back then, he had been trying to cheer her up and make her happy, unlike now. Back then, he had been determined to fight because he believed that maybe he was fighting for her too...
Junpei finally heard what she was trying to say.
"I'll fight," Junpei whispered. "Fight, get rid of the Dark Hour, end everything, and live for the both of us…"
His finger trailed over the pencil lines.
"End it, and live. For the both of…"
He let her warmth comforted him as he cried.