Nuss 6:02PM
Luke
Paula found chocolate fondue
Nuss has sent you an attachment (3)
Lookas 6:04PM
That looks good
I'm jealous
Nuss 6:05PM
I wish yu were here
Lookas 6:05PM
Me too
Nuss 6:05PM
:O
Lookas 6:05PM
Gogo
Don't leave Paula hanging
I'll defeat Cuphead on your honor
Nuss 6:05PM
:)
Lookas 6:05PM
:))
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~oO0Oo~
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"Am fearsome predator."
"Yes, you are. Very scary."
"E-E-Exactly. I am your trustiest trustworthy friend." Rope Snake pokes his head out to survey the people bustling under the balcony. When a couple of girls giggle past, their stray thoughts hopeful for a shirtless Link, I hastily stuff him back into the sleeve of my dress-shirt. Rope Snake's quick to express his displeasure though. I feel it manifest in the painful nip on my wrist.
"Ow! Quit it."
"B-Bite me."
"...Sorry."
The tickle of a lick tells me I've been forgiven.
Something moans behind us. "oOOoh." A fat Luma balloons into view over the rim of the railing. Floating and bobbing like a beachball, it's helpless against his own girth.
I stifle a grin. It's that time of year again. Rosalina's mentioned that the birth of a new year often brought about the birth of new galaxies, and judging from the size of this Hungry Luma, he's ready to pop. Curiosity his first name, Rope Snake checks out the newest visitor, his scales roughly rubbing against my arm as he slithers back out of my sleeve.
The Hungry Luma whimpers. "Foood?"
I check all my pockets, and raise my empty hands in regret. No Starbits.
"Gonna burst... but food so good...!" Lighter than a good dream, the disappointed Luma continues to rise upwards like a lost helium balloon.
Rope snake sniffs in disdain at the display. "Ss-See? B-Blimps everywhere. I am master of stealth. Not clumsy like these b-b-balloons." As if to prove his point, Rope Snake unhinges his jaw, letting it dangle before snapping it back up. "I can do this on my own. You sss-said you were busy. Return to the n-nest."
Admittedly, Ness does have a nice stash of games and movies waiting in the living room, but Rope Snake's revelation is arguably more important than Ace Attorney and AstroBoy.
"I changed my mind."
"Someone's j-j-jealous."
"You dragged me out here. Might as well look out for Ness while I'm at it," I remind him gently, and Rope Snake huffs. He's still sour over Ness's previous encounter. "I'll tell him to apologize. Do you smell anything?"
Rope Snake flicks his tongue out to taste the air again. Animals and Pokemon have much keener senses than me. I've seen Duck Hunt Dog predict earthquakes and Pikachu smell thunderstorms at the twitch of his nose. And despite his dramatic flairs, Rope Snake's been antsy all evening. He's usually sensitive during a shedding, but I've known him long enough to see through his airs.
Better safe then sorry.
I press him, "What do you smell?"
"Something bad."
"What kind of bad?"
Rope Snake switches tongues into a low rattlesnake hiss. His eyes turn to slits. "Awful bad."
I watch a panicking chef below grab a burning pan and toss it into the sink. "Well, you're not wrong."
"Not smoke. I taste... sour," Rope Snake hisses. "Sharp and sour. Like blood. But not tasty."
I puzzle over his jurisdiction. "Blood? I guess we are right above a kitchen-"
"I f-feel sick."
I let him slither onto the railing. "Better?"
"Hungry. Want rat," Rope Snake groans.
"Let's go inside. I'll defrost one for you-"
"Hey, Lucas! Fancy seeing you here-" Shulk halts, uncertainly glancing at a dry-heaving Rope Snake. "Er, is he all right?"
"Peachy-keen," Rope Snake squeaks.
"Rope snake said he smelled something strange, so we stepped out for some fresh air."
"Blimey. Something strange, huh? Gimme a minute..." Shulk rummages around the many pockets on his cargo pants. Finally finding what he's been looking for, Shulk opens a bulky pouch if mentally counting its contents, before thrusting the gift into my hands. "Funny you say that. I was just looking for you. I dunno if it's because of Ness yesterday, but I got another vision just now. About you. You'll need this tonight."
The pouch is surprisingly lighter than it looks.
Feeling more lost by the second, I glance into the pouch. Inside is what looks like sugar crystals. I recognize their rainbow glitter. Starbits. "Why?"
Shulk shrugs. "I don't know. I saw you needing exactly four-hundred and twenty."
"Don't Hungry Lumas eat these?"
"Usually. Starbits have minor healing properties too, but I'd use them as a last resort. They're not really for human consumption." Catching my expression, Shulk gives into a nervous smile. "Hey now- my visions don't always spell doom and gloom. Maybe they're for Rope Snake?"
Unconvinced, I glance over the railing. Shulk follows my eyes to a familiar bobbing head in the crowd. Despite the crest and trough of the crowd, I pick Ness out by his clothes. He's having the time of his life, helplessly laughing and clutching his sides from what seems like a joke, and Paula grins beside him, the guilty speaker of the punchline.
Shulk realizes. "They're not for Ness."
"Are you sure?"
"...no," he admits reluctantly, and I slip the pouch into my pocket. I'm not superstitious, not by chance, but Shulk's uncanny timing forces me to give pause.
Rope Snake might be onto something.
But first, feeding time. When I drop a defrosted rat into Rope Snake's terrarium (shaking the throbbing sensation off my hand when he accidentally misses and chomps me), Rope Snake gags... then retches out a hairball onto the floor.
"No wonder you were feeling sick," I accuse, feeling betrayed, and a guilty Rope Snake snaps open his jaws so I can untangle the rest of the hairball from his teeth. This unfortunately isn't the first time he's scavenged my hair from the trashbin. He should know better. By the time I've extracted the last of the hairball, I'm dripping up to my elbows in mucus. So when I wipe his tank clean and wash my hands in the kitchen sink, Rope Snake has the sense to look ashamed.
"Was h-h-hungry. No regrets."
"But I fed you on time last month-"
"P-p-phone?" Rope Snake whimpers, pathetically curling up into a tight knot.
I give him the evil eye before turning to his saving grace. Recognizing the name on my phone screen, Rope snake relaxes, flicking his tongue over the defrosting rat in his terrarium.
It's Gramps.
I feel an odd mixture of relief. Every night, my grandfather likes to talk about his day. How busy the Dorayaki stand was, how cold it's been lately, if I've eaten dinner yet. He does most of the talking, but I don't mind. I get the feeling that he's lonely by himself a lot, so I listen for however long his conversation takes. It's a way for me to connect with the little family I have, and at the very least, with Porky around, every call means that my grandfather's safe.
Either way, he's got friends in the village. I don't have to worry about him.
I call him back.
He's not there. Instead, a worried voice interrupts me. "Lucas, this is Tessie. Is Alec with you?"
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~Chapter Thirty-Six~
The Final Stand
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No.
He should've been safe. The villagers were never alone. At least, not in the village. No matter what time it was, Leder was always there keeping watch. And though most of the villagers ignored me, Alec agreed not to accept gifts from Porky. My grandfather was absentminded at times, and cracked bad puns that made me groan, but he was smart enough to see Porky for who he was.
Grabbing my things, I pelt Tessie with questions. Where did he go? Who saw him last? Did Porky show up?
No one knows. Wess was last to see him for dinner yesterday. No, Porky only stops by on mornings, she says. It's okay, Lucas. I think he wondered off to the graveyard and got lost. It's happened before.
I don't believe in coincidence. Shulk's gift weighs down my pocket.
Still I hesitate.
There's a good chance I'm bumping into Porky tonight, Ness had said. I'd promised him to stay behind, but my grandfather was missing. I couldn't be in two places at once. Of the two, Ness can take care of himself... but I'd feel more at ease if I could be here for him somehow.
The choice is obvious.
Rope Snake uneasily ties himself into a knot, his meal untouched. He doesn't have the best hearing, but he's obviously heard the conversation through the vibrations. He knows what's coming.
So when Rope Snake curls himself back into my pocket like a roll-up, I pluck him back out, careful to avoid his shedding skin. "Keep an eye on Ness."
"We're a t-team."
"We are. That's why I can trust you with this. If I'm not back by tomorrow, let the Twelve know."
Mollified, Rope snake eats up the praise. To sweeten up the deal, I promise him plenty of naptimes this week. Eventually Rope Snake relents. He unhinges his jaw with a reluctant sigh, uncurls himself from my hands, and slithers onto the floor.
That's one problem taken care of.
Before the last of his tail slips out the keyhole, I've followed suit. Once I find my grandfather, I should be back soon, but I text Ness for a heads up. The text lags, but I stuff my phone back into my pocket, confident that it'll send soon. Either way, I have an alibi.
I wonder how much of the future Shulk foresaw this time.
It doesn't take long to track down the Hungry Luma. It's hard not to. He leaves behind colorful sparkles that twinkle and fade on the floor, so when I find him, he's wedged underneath the glass ceiling of the 12th floor Planetarium like a Genie squished in a bottle.
When I approach, loosening the drawstring on Shulk's pouch, the Hungry Luma spots me faster than a bloodhound. "Starbits...? Give me!"
"Can you could make me a Launch Star to Tazmily?"
"Tazmily? I could!" The Luma cheerfully waves its blubbery arms around. Another wave of sparkles fall off his starry form like snow. "But first, I need Starbits! And a wish."
I'm taken aback. Rosalina never mentioned this before. "A wish?"
"A happy wish," the Hungry Luma agrees.
"I'm not sure I have a happy wish..."
"Nonsense! Every child has a happy wish. A wish that makes you smile. A wish you'd make under a shooting star... Yes! Give me one of those!"
I feel lost. It's silly, really. I don't remember the last time I wished for anything under a shooting star. Wishing didn't bring me this far. Wishing didn't bring my mom back. What if my wish wasn't happy enough?
...What if I didn't feel like a child anymore?
The Luma laughs. His bubbly laugh rolls over his body like a wave of joy, and the Starbits glow warm in my hands. "Ah, Little Prince. We all grow up, but deep down, we are still children at heart. You can never be too old to dream, Little Lucas, for Dreaming is a magic we all possess." he says kindly. "Now then, think of the happiest things. Let your wishes propel you into the air... and-" The bumbling Luma opens his mouth wide. His goofy grin widens when he succeeds in making me smile. "Aaa!"
I think of Ness. Of my family. Of the Smashers and Tazmily Villagers. I guess a little wishing couldn't hurt.
So I wish.
I wish to make the world a better place. I wish to live in a future where I don't have to worry about being an adult at sixteen. A future where everyone I love is safe. A future that is kind to those who need it most.
I wish for a happy ending.
I pour the Starbits out of Shulk's pouch. The Starbits rush into Luma's mouth like a rainbow chasing its Pot of Gold, and glowing like the happiest being without a worry in the world, the Hungry Luma twirls itself into a Launch Star with the laugh of a thousand stars. The North Star twinkles. Somewhere, a new galaxy is born...
And as I race the stars in the sky and fly over a city bathed in moonlight, I feel like a shooting star.
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~oO0Oo~
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The forest is dark when I land in Tazmily Village. The surrounding cherry blossom trees blot out the moon, their silhouettes showing off their first baby leaves of spring. Otherwise, the sky's quiet and empty, the sparrows already nesting in their new homes for the night. When they whistle welcome, I whistle back. Sparrows aren't the smartest birds, but even if Corvids and parrots outstrip them in brains, sparrows are easy to talk to. They're just as compassionate and comfortable around humans.
Hobbling along with his knobbly knees, the Big Friendly Giant Leder lights the lamps along the square. His lamplighter looks like a matchstick in his enormous hands. This is the first time I've seen him move. Something tells me that he lights the streetlamps every night, when the villagers have gone to bed. As if sensing my presence, Leder turns around. He blinks balefully.
I ask him if he's seen my grandfather today.
He shakes his head.
I leave. Like a tall hunched specter, I feel his eyes on me as he watches me go. An impending sense of foreboding weighs down on my chest.
When I arrive at my grandfather's cottage, Tessie greets me inside.
Apparently, I'd worried over nothing.
"Your old man's back in now. Must've gotten lost in the forest last night," Tessie says, now fussing over me like a mother. She reminds me of Peach. "I tried calling you, but the signal's been spotty in the village. It does this often on windy nights, but goodness! You came all this way for nothing-"
Passing by the glass display of Alec's prized sushi knife and traditional fishing supplies, I follow her in. "How is he?"
Tessie sighs. "Alec didn't let me check on him, but he seems fine. He did say he was faint from hunger, so Lighter brewed up some mush, but your old man's been refusing to eat all night until he sees you. Stubborn as a mule, I tell you, Lucas."
Two other people wait inside the bedroom. Camped on either side of a bedredden Alec, they speak in frustrated undertones of Japanese, but stop to glance up at my approach. I recognize the older man as Wess - Duster's dad - but don't remember the much younger man beside him. Middle-aged and stocky, the second man's got a gritty beard and gray super saiyan hair.
"Lighter," he says, shaking my hand.
His name jogs my memory. "The Village Lumberjack."
"That I am. We're close friends of your family. I grew up with Flint once upon a time... I think." Lighter hesitates. "The Tazmily memory problems can wait. Your grandfather's been expecting you."
"Lucas," my grandfather rasps, reaching for my face.
I settle for holding onto his hand.
"See? What did I tell ya. I told you to eat, you stubborn old coot. You're lucky Tessie and Lighter were here," Wess says in exasperation. I don't know why my grandfather downplayed the Villagers' language proficiency. Aside from his strong accent and occasional slip-ups, Wess's English is near impeccable.
My grandfather scowls. "I'm not hungry! I want to see my grandson."
"He's right there. See here, Alec! You're luckier to have a grandson like him. If Duster was anything like Lucas, I bet he would've been less of a moron! What a family disappointment my son is. Hmph!"
Lighter coughs. "Erm, now that Lucas is here, you might want to eat, Alec."
"I'm not eating."
"Alec-"
"I smelled your cooking, Lighter. Are you trying to poison me?"
Lighter looks hurt. "This is my son's favorite rice gruel whenever he gets sick. It's not that bad-"
"Not that bad? Ha! Lucas, you taste it for me. If you think it's okay, I'll take a bite-"
"I'm full," I say quickly.
"Full? You need more meat on those bones-"
I persist. "The food smells good. How long did it take you, Lighter?"
"Barely half an hour."
"You must've been busy. Were you here the entire time?"
"No. I had to feed my son around eight. Tessie was on her way here. Wess arrived afterwards."
"I see. Thanks." I glance at the window. "It's getting late. I can take over now."
Lighter looks at me strangely. "Lucas, it really is no problem. All I did was cook up some rice gruel."
Wess snorts, clapping Lighter on the back. "But the boy's got a point. He's here, so we can go home. Alec, eat your rice gruel. Tessie, let's go!" As I bid them goodbye at the door, Tessie fretting over the cut network ("It's still down... Strange. I hope they fix it soon.") and Wess complaining about Duster ("Bah, it's unreliable. They should name this network after my son!"), Lighter stops at the threshold, his eyes flickering in the direction of Alec's room.
"...He doesn't seem alright. Make sure he eats, okay?" Lighter finally says. The look he gives me reminds me of my dad's. He's more perceptive than I thought. I nod, and when Lighter ambles away, hefting his 2 by 4 over his shoulder, I lock the door. Then I clear the kitchen of potential weapons, throwing all the kitchen knives out the window.
When I return, he's sitting up in bed. Fumbling around the bowl, Alec peers into Lighter's rice gruel with ill-concealed distrust. "...You're right. I think I was too harsh on Lighter. The gruel seems good." He gives a heavy scoop and points it my way. The spoon wobbles in his grip. "Try some, Ryuka."
"I'm good. You should eat. Tessie said that you were feeling faint."
Rice gruel dribbles over the edge of the spoon. "Don't make me waste food, grandson."
I take the spoon from him and drop it back into his bowl. "After one question."
"Anything for you."
My smile hardens. "Where's my grandfather?"
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~oO0Oo~
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The imposter's smile upturns into a disapproving frown. His voice is convincing enough to be overlooked. Had I not arrived with my guard up, I might've been hoodwinked. "What? You don't recognize your own grandfather?"
"Nice try. Where is he?"
The imposter stares at me. "What gave it away?"
"I knew it when-"
He hurls his bowl of rice gruel at my face.
Reflexively I duck. Hearing the bowl shatter against the wall, I grab him by the arm and hurl him into the ground. Skidding towards the kitchen, he staggers to his feet and gropes around for anything he can use.
Then he lunges to the side, and realize my mistake too late.
The glass display.
With a quick punch, he nabs Alec's sushi knife. I fall back when he slices around in wild arcs, tearing the carpet into ribbons, and barely avoid becoming sashimi when he stabs the floor right where my foot was a split second before. The knife quivers in place.
When he bends down to pick it up, I blast fire right into his face.
"Lucas," the bot rasps, its damaged voice box betraying itself. Its fingers slide into his pocket, which morphs and molds his hand into a semblance of a gun. "You are a fool-"
I crush his head with ice.
The sushi knife thunks onto the floor. A crack splitting its head into two, the Porky Bot struggles feebly like a caught fish on the line before going limp. Even as a bot, its resemblance to my grandfather is eerily accurate.
My heart pounding in my ears, I extinguish the fire on the coffee table with a cup of water. There's no time to worry about the house. I need to find my grandfather.
But that concern is shunted to the side when Wess breaks the doorknob off and crashes in, gasping and sweaty-faced. "Lucas, the forest... f-f-fire!"
The blistering heatwave greets me outside.
It's chaos.
Surrounding the village, fire spreads across the forest like the Seven Circles of Hell, crackling on the thatches of the rooves and eating up tree trunks whole. There's commotion when the terrified villagers run out with whatever belongings they can carry, yelling and screaming and coughing through the smoke. When I test out my powers on what looks like the heart of the fire, my heart sinks. It's already too hot. My magical ice sublimes before it even escapes from my fingers, and PK Magnet is too small to contain a fire this large.
Most of the wildlife are smart enough to have fled by now, but not all. When a trio of baby sparrows cry, "Hot! Hot! Hot!", I scoop them up from their fallen nest on the ground, and wrap them up in my jacket. On my way to the Town Square, I free as many people stuck in the rubble as I can, and treat their burns with PK Freeze.
This forest was supposed to be a sanctuary.
But what protected the village before was now its funeral pyre.
At the Town Square, Tessie hands out wet rags from the well. At this point, the villagers pick their poison; no one was keen on suffocating into a crisp in seconds, and the poisoned water would take longer to take effect. By the time I arrive, a sizeable crowd has gathered around Tessie, but the instant the other villagers see me, they flock over to me like lost sheep, their faces turning hopeful. Oh no. I don't need telepathy to know what they're thinking.
I don't have a plan.
This isn't good.
As Tessie calms the villagers down, I quickly count the heads. There's an obvious face missing. "...Where's Lighter?"
"He ran back for his son, Fuel," Tessie says, wringing her hands.
"When are they coming back?"
Leder shakes his head for the second time. The crowd murmurs uneasily. The baby sparrows cry in my arms.
There's a morbid kind of humor about a boy named Fuel stuck in a burning house, but I ignore it. "Rope snake, can you-"
Oh. That's right. I left him behind.
I swallow the rest of my words down. Everyone else is here. I'll have to double back for Lighter and his son later. Already sensing my lapse in judgment, the Tazmily Villagers fidget. With my grandfather and Lighter out for the count, if I don't spearhead a plan soon, we'll end up dissociating from panic.
As I hand the makeshift nest of baby sparrows over to Tessie, and tell Wess to check on the injured, I buy myself time, using my free hands to contact the Mansion. Miraculously, the call goes through twice, but no one picks up. Unusual. When the call doesn't connect, I give up and call the local police station. The fire station. Ness.
None of the signals go through. No one's coming to help us.
Porky's trapped us in Tazmily and nailed the coffin lid shut.
The fire grows. Tessie wipes the sweat off her brow. In her arms, the baby sparrows cheep and flutter in my jacket. "Lucas, I tried calling Emergency services earlier. Did you get anything?"
"No. The connection's down."
Unfortunately, the nearest couple catches wind of the situation. "Are you saying..." The husband turns hysterical. "Are you saying we're doomed?"
"OH MY GOD! Matt, we're going to die!"
"I don't want to die!"
"I'm too young too die!"
"Why didn't Master Hand send us a useful smasher like Mario?!"
I try to regain control. Stay calm. "We'll make it. I have a plan-"
"I knew it," Butch bleats in terror. "This is all Duster's fault! He started the fire! Duster the murderer-"
"How dare you! My son is such a moron that I bet he doesn't even know what a fire is," Wess roars.
"Curse you, Wess! And a thousand curses to Duster-"
"It's not Duster's fault," I interrupt, and the crowd quiets down, at least for just a moment. "I know we're all stressed out, but we'll get out of here alive."
Butch's eyes dawn with realization. "You're right. It's not Duster's fault."
Thank you.
"It's your fault!"
...What?
"We should've listened to that Porky man when we had da' chance!" Picking up steam, an enraged Butch blubbers and shakes his fist at me. "We were all happy before you came. Before you showed up a-and cursed our village. We were all mighty blessed that Mister Minch was nice enough to step in and fix your screw up with his generosity, but then you had to go on and ruin it for us like the rich snob ya are. Now I lost all my happy pills, all my money, and all my happiness... because of you!"
His tirade sparks a witch hunt.
Any semblance of control's spiraled out of my hands.
The villagers scream when more Porky bots surround us through the smoke. In identical pink military uniforms like Christmas nutcracker soldiers, this platoon of Porky bots levels their Dark Guns and marches us into a corner. On an ordinary day, their Pig Masks might've looked ridiculous, but their added surrealism only hikes up their eerie threat.
I weigh my chances for combat. Not good. I'd rather avoid fire. My ice might give us cover, but under this heat, it's temporary at best. PK Thunder's long-range, but leaves my guard down for too long. And as glamorous as Hollywood movies make the prospect sound, I'd rather not sacrifice myself unless I had no choice but to. If I go down, I can't guarentee safety for the villagers. I can fight, but I'm not sure that I can protect them at the same time.
Butch squeals in terror and scoots behind me. Wess readies a fighting stance with a scowl. The rest of the villagers shuffle around nervously.
There's nowhere to run.
I brace myself for the defensive.
A portly toy general - swathed in a white cape - steps out among the ranks of its breathen. Its eyes glow and click.
Then Porky's wheeze rasps out of the record player in its mask.
"Lucas of Tazmily, heed the high command of King Porky. You are surrounded. The Pigmask Army outnumbers you. If you kneel before me and surrender, Master Porky will mercifully spare the Villagers."
Smoke stings my eyes. "Liar."
"He is a generous man. Master Porky tires of bloodshed. He offers the villagers his kindness. He will honor the women and children into his bedchambers, and admit the bravery of your men into his labor camps. But should you refuse-" The general turns his head to stare directly at Butch, and Butch whimpers behind me. "He will shoot your grandfather down like a dog. He will slaughter every person in his sight and harvest their organs. He will raze and burn the village down to the ground until not even a speck of ash remains."
Butch wails. "What're you waiting for, dammit! Turn yourself in-"
In silent dissent, the rest of the villagers huddle closer, hoisting up their pitchforks and fists. My throat burns from gratitude.
"Don't listen to him, Lucas. Porky's lying," Wess mutters, casting Butch a mean look. "Even if most of the villagers distrust you, there's no reason for Porky to keep us alive once you fall."
The villagers need me.
I have to protect them.
Tessie, Wess, From the corner of my eye, I catch them jolt from the unexpected telepathy. I'll cover you. On the count of three, tell the villagers to-
Then a Drago crashes through the trees with a deafening roar, and chomps down on the flailing General bot. Shaking its head violently, the Drago rips the Porky Bot's head clean off its body, effortlessly swatting other scattering Porky Bots aside with his tail. As if Porky himself had no idea what to make of the newcomers, his LEGO army disperses and skitters around in confusion.
And on the Drago's back, nestled in a harness, is a girl with bubble-gum pink hair.
Upon seeing me, she crows in delight. "About time I repaid you for the favor, eh Lucas?!"
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~oO0Oo~
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Our PK Freeze combined does the trick.
Together, as if we've fought as one before, we make short work of the Porky bots.
I don't remember fighting with a PSI user other than Ness, but fighting alongside her is different. Her excitement pulses through my blood like a sugar high. Wild, savage, and unrestrained, her magic tears through the Porky bots like paper, somehow managing to make Ness's look well-behaved in contrast. Where Ness is balanced in hand-to-hand combat, she gives no fucks, fighting aggressively on offense with the speed of a tiger and the wrath of a bear.
As the heart of the forest fire roars through, we keep the flames at bay when they fringe too close, and keep the villagers alive.
When the last Porky Bot falls, I yank my fist from its frost-ridden mask and survey the damage. "Thanks for the save."
"Don't mention it. You saved me first."
I did?
Unfortunately, the Drago takes my confusion as an invitation to butt me off my feet with its head, before proceeding to lick the ever-loving life out of my face. "Thanks to you too- pptbth, oh nooo-"
"You're seriously lucky that we were nearby. This lil guy must've recognized you, because the second he spotted you, there was no turning back- Woah, wait a sec." The girl grabs me by the shoulders and whirls me around. She searches my face, then groans. "Lucas, pal. Please don't tell me you've forgotten who I am."
I don't know what triggers it first: the nostalgic punch of her magic, or her wild pink hair. A name suddenly clicks into place. "...Kumatora."
Kumatora grins. "That's more like it."
Kumatora quickly fills me in: for the past several years, Porky had poached all of the adult dragos in the mountains for their hides to sell as expensive leather. After accidentally stumbling upon the orphans and discovering their cave, Kumatora had kept watch over the remaining baby Dragos since, working as a waitress by day, and helping the Dragos migrate from nest to nest by night. When the disturbance of the forest fire shook the area, worried that Porky had built another base close by, she'd taken the oldest drago along to investigate.
Kumatora laughs, shaking her head in disbelief. "I had no idea there was a village here. You'd think that I'd have found it after all those years...!"
"Well, I'm glad you found it today." Catching sight of the uncertain villagers huddled together, I grimace. "I hate to break this reunion short, but it's too early to celebrate. Porky's got reinforcements."
"So what now?" she says, crossing her arms. Next to her, the drago yowls, curiously whiffs over the soot on my hair, then nuzzles me like the world's friendliest green T-Rex. Despite its thick bulletproof hide, this drago's barely an adolescent, and only large enough to carry one person. We had the advantage of surprise before; I doubt this Drago could sweep the field as easily next time. If there even is a next time. I scratch it behind the ears, and the Drago gives a happy throaty rumble. Despite its intimidating appearance, it's a gentle creature. My heart melts.
With them both here, it's easier to think.
"Kumatora, where's the Drago nest?"
She jabs her thumb up. "The nest? Right now, it's right outside the village, farther up the mountain. Why?"
"We need to bust the villagers out of here. Here-" I toss her my phone and gesture to the villagers. "When you're safe, call the Smashers for help. I'll join you after doubling back for stragglers."
"How are you gonna find your way up?"
"I'll figure it out."
Doubtful now, Kumatora frowns, watching me absorb energy into magic from the nearest fire. "What about your grandfather?"
"Porky likes theatrics. He won't kill him now."
"Fucking piece of barnacle scum," Kumatora says darkly.
"Hurry. I can buy you time, but it won't last long-"
"I got you. Leave it to me." Kumatora whistles, grabbing the drago's attention. "Hey everyone, get your damn asses into gear, and follow me!"
Those who can't walk are paired with one or two people who can. With Biff the only villager with a broken leg, we strap him to the Drago's harness. As soon as we test that the harness is secure, the Drago gives me a last nuzzle and leads the way, trampling the fire underneath its thick feet and smothering smaller fires in its wake. The villagers need no other incentive to follow, hurrying into the path that's been cleared. Wess flashes me a worried look. Tessie wishes me luck. Kumatora takes up the rear. After a final glance back, she grins, gives me a high-five, and darts off to pick up the pace.
The flames greedily swallow up their trail.
Most of the villagers are safe. Now it's just Lighter and Fuel. Turning back to the burning village, I will the magic into my hands.
Breathe in.
Exhale.
I blast a wind of frost from my hands, carving a sizable path across a weak patch of fire, and retrace my path back into Tazmily Village.
The forest fire's left destruction in its wake. With Kumatora's help, the heart of the flames has moved on, allowing me to take in the full extent of damage. The well's scorched dry. I race past several charred houses, their support beams crackling black.
To my dismay, Lighter's house has completely caved in by the time I arrive. The thatch roof smokes and smolders over the burning wreckage. I call out their names, but get no response in return.
I'm too late.
No, wait. I see tracks. They're sooty footprints against uncharred dirt: three pairs leaving the house. Two of them would've belonged to Lighter and Fuel. Did Porky reach them first? I doubt it. Porky doesn't have any reason to hunt for more hostages under subterfage, and there's no sign of a struggle outside of the burning house. The third's likely to be another unaccounted Villager.
Nearby, a heartbroken sparrow warbles for her missing nestlings. When I make a trill in response and wait, the mother sparrow lands, fluttering and panicking about on a burnt branch. "My nestlings! My triplets! Oh, have you seen my *trill*plets?"
It takes a while for my message to go across, especially with my clumsy sparrow, but the mother understands. Her children are safe. When she twitters her thanks, I ask her a favor. She's kind enough to oblige, and I watch her follow the footsteps out of sight. With any luck, she'll guide Fuel and Lighter to Kumatora on her way to her triplets.
Then as if to ruin my streak of good luck, I spot a familiar clearing. The forest fire's long burned down the sunflower field, but there's another platoon of Porky bots arranged in the distinctive semicircle of a shooting squad... and someone else.
My grandfather, tied and blindfolded to a gravestone.
.
.
.
~oO0Oo~
.
.
.
I don't remember screaming.
I don't know how I made it.
But I manage to deflect the first round of shots. PK Freeze has saved me twice today.
"Lucas," my grandfather says, his voice weak, turning his head to my direction. Even now, he's worried about me. My throat constricts when he blindly reaches around for me, and I press his hand onto my face. Hostage situations are the dumbest trick in the book to fall for, but I've got so much to lose. I'm not losing what's left of my family.
A crunch of desiccated leaves.
"Here we are. The beginning of the end."
Behind his firing squad, Porky watches us in the comfort of his spider mech. Even through the reflective glass, I can feel his eyes bore through the back of my head. The hungry edge in his voice makes his expression the more unnerving.
"Lucas. I was wondering if you'd come."
I don't mind him rambling. Out of Porky's view, I first fumble for the ropes around my grandfather's wrists with one hand, but they're knotted too tightly. I need to burn them off. As I strain the ropes, the edges of her gravestone chip and flake off under my hands.
Sorry, Mom. I'll find you another gravestone.
"It's a shame you wasted my food. I knew you'd eat only what your grandfather would give you. Yet you were too spoiled to indulge in my Happy Pills. Aha. Hahaha." A wheeze. "It's funny, really. You could've been happy. You could've stayed blissfully ignorant and left the past behind you. But no. You had to deny the villagers the same happiness that you yourself so crave."
"I didn't deny them happiness. You tricked them into buying your drugs."
"And what did you gain from the truth? Nothing. Greed exists everywhere. Why stifle what is human nature?" Porky wheezes. "I wonder if I should thank you. You were the reason behind this paradox after all. It's incredible how someone so insignificant and worthless caused my dream to come true."
One rope down. I stall Porky for time. "What dream."
"I suppose I owe you this story. Yes, I'm talking about the magnificent life story about me, the most clever, most charming, and most trouble-making boy who ever lived. Master Porky Minch." A wheeze. "You see... Once upon a time, this most charming boy lived in Onett. He was loved by everyone. He was so popular that he had the leisure of picking his own friends. But then a loser uglier and poorer than him stole away one of his friends - his neighbor. Now imagine how that boy felt."
Two ropes down. Down to the last. "...Bad?" I guess.
"Horrible," Porky groans. "So horrible that one day, this most charming boy followed his neighbor out to see this loser for himself. He found out that the loser was named Lucas. Of all the stupid names-" He stops, wheezing uncontrollably in a fit of anger. The fit subsides. "So this most charming boy did his best to win his neighbor back. But it was too late. This Lucas had turned his neighbor into a traitor. A loser like himself. When Giygas failed to remind this neighbor of their friendship, this sad, most charming boy fled into the future without a friend, where he would become King of the World. For years, this most charming, most beloved boy ruled the land like it was his oyster... but years later, what does he find?" Porky wheezes. "A little boy at death's door."
My heart turns cold. It can't be.
"Yes. It was a little boy... who looked exactly like the loser who stole his neighbor away. Impossible! But this time, this most charming boy was merciful. This most charming boy spared the loser a place in the kingdom. He permitted the loser to be his friend."
"Friend? You tortured and brainwashed him into liking you-"
"At first, this most charming boy had no idea. He thought that he had won." A heavy wheeze. "But years later, this most charming boy hears about another boy crawling his way. To stop him, no less! And what is this boy's name? Lucas."
With another wheeze, Porky transfixes his piggy eyes on me. "For years, I've thought long and hard about what to do with you. I've dreamed about different ways to kill you. I've fantasized about fucking you and auctioning you to the lowest bidder. But I changed my mind. You did bring me back to the time I so missed as King. For that, I will reward you." Porky's eyes turn dark with barely-suppressed glee. "You will serve me the same way your brother did years ago. You will serve me as your new master. My new lapdog."
"Never."
"I don't remember giving you a choice. I always get what I want... I've always preferred to keep my friends close, and my enemies closer-"
No point waiting around now. I burn through the last rope, untangling the charred knots. Porky watches me in no apparent hurry.
"Thank you for playing this final game with me. It was fun knowing you." A pause. Then a wheeze. "Kill them."
Right before the guns go off, I smash a PK Freeze at my feet and yank my grandfather free. I don't know what Porky did to him, but even after shaking off his blindfold, he's too weak to run. We've barely cleared the field and landed into the woods when he stumbles, pitching forward into the ground. Ignoring his protests to leave him behind, I carry him on my back, checking behind me every other step for sharp shooters. It's a small comfort when I feel my grandfather's arms loop tighter around me. His safety comes first.
I can't think of a worse fate than to fall to Porky.
"Lucas," gramps whispers.
"We'll make it."
"I'm slowing you down."
"You're lighter than Ness. I can handle this much weight."
We pass his charred house, the Town Square, the well. Just as I spot Sunshine Shrine, I hear the shots whiz somewhere behind me, forcing me to lower him back onto his feet. I don't want him to get hit by any stray shots on my back. Nearby, just beyond Sunshrine Shrine lies the glimmer of the city. Now filled with renewed energy, my grandfather's face brightens up. He redoubles his stride, and I take up the guard.
Ten meters.
Five.
We're close now. Close enough to see the police tape barricading the forest, close enough to see the police with their gas masks on. The sirens on their cars flash blue and red.
Is that them?
I think so.
Porky said they were coming this way.
I slow, suddenly uneasy. "Wait," I say, but sensing freedom so close by, my grandfather musters all his strength to reach forward, calling out to the nearest officer for help-
What happens next isn't easy to describe.
The officer turns around with a glinting pistol. There's a shot.
The bullet hits home.
Alec collapses.
More shots ring through the night. I dive for my grandfather. Smoke pours into my vision. A gas cannister? Shit, I can't see. I can't tell where he's been shot. The smoke clogs up my eyes.
Back into the forest it is.
But I'm not as fast as I'm supposed to be. I think the smoke... did they drug me? He's bleeding though. I think he's dying. He's not moving. He can't be dying.
In a last-ditch attempt, I let out a whistle. Nothing. I repeat it over and over again on the run. Still nothing. I'm desperate now.
Around me, I hear the sparrows help, echoing my call.
Stomp. Stomp. A worried whine. A lick on the face.
The harness.
My fingers are shaking, and I'm so dizzy I can't get all the straps on right, but it works. He's in the harness. He's bleeding so much.
The Drago licks my arm. Ow, it stings. I give the Drago a clumsy push. The Drago whines again, louder and more insistent, and my push turns into a shove. He gets the hint. A rustle, and he's gone. My leg buckles under my weight. The bullets ring closer. I've defeated Porky once, I can do it again. I can fight them all off.
I'm not losing to the man who murdered my brother.
.
.
.
~oO0Oo~
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.
.
Porky Minch steps forward, feeling the charred sunflower petals crunch and collapse under his shoes. Around him, Tazmily Village smolders, its dying embers crumbling into the bitter remains of a fire that had once feasted on the bones of the forest.
The eyes of his discarded spider mech glitter like obsidians. Against the smoking ruins of the well, it sticks out like a diamond in a haystack.
Porky meets the Onett Police there. Like a fly stuck to rotting carrion, Captain Strong weasels up to him. They pass Strong's lackeys: four lieutenants and some, all armed with manual pistols.
Captain Strong's face is bruised in an ironic mirror image. One eye has swollen shut. "The boy headed where you said he would. Sprayed him with laughing gas- lost him once, but we cornered him here. He's obviously ditched the old man at some point, but we have no idea where the old man-"
"Nevermind the old geezer, you buffoon. I want to know about the boy."
To his own credit, Strong's sycophantic smile falters, but stays. "My platoon closed in on the boy. Took a few shots to take him down, messed him up like you said... and we've left you the last shot, as requested." When Porky says nothing, instead pulling out a handkerchief and wiping his hands clean of soot, Strong fidgets. "Hey. Not saying that I believe him, but the boy accused me of being your fall guy. And I can't help but wonder- Ah, again, not saying that I believe him-"
"Ridiculous," Porky wheezes. "Captain Strong, would you ever take the word of a sixteen-year-old over mine?"
The answer's obvious. Captain Strong responds in the negative, sounding satisfied, smug even, over his own security.
If only the man knew how dispensable he was.
An angry hiss of pain. Captain Strong rubs his own sore eye. "Sonova bitch. Fucking lunatic punched me in the eye when I tried to touch his face-"
"Where is he?"
All too eager to comply, Captain Strong points at a shackled heap on the ground.
Porky Minch brushes past him, slipping on his white Gentlemen's gloves. He's not risking any slip-ups with the base. Another Porky Bot bows low and presents him a Dark Gun on a tray, polished for the occasion. Porky takes it.
Somehow, the loser's still breathing, ragged and unsteady, his once-perfect hair streaked with blood. His blue eyes remain half-open and glassy, seeing but unseeing. He's a monster for even lasting this long, Porky gives him that. But that only means he'll soon be Master Porky's perfect little monster.
Porky delivers the final shot.
The golden amiibo topples over into the dirt. Porky pockets it.
At long last, his collection is complete.
Author's Note:
…φ(。。)
Though rare, short 3rd person POV scenes will be sprinkled sparsely throughout the fic, but only to highlight important moments. Minor note, but we'll touch upon what Rope Snek smelled in the next chapter. Shout out to Forestfire34720 for their feedback about timing.
In case I need to refresh and clear things up:
(1) All Porky Bots in this fic wield retractable DARK GUNS
(2) The Onett police were carrying manual weapons (i.e. pistol with real bullets)
time to hide- I mean, hibernate for the next few months (ﾟ∀ﾟ人)
*In general, Corvids (includes crows and ravens) and Parrots are arguably the smartest of all bird species.
*Snakes are opportunistic feeders, but must be fed on average ~once per month. Feeding time varies with snake species.
*In Mario Galaxy, Hungry Lumas eat as many StarBits as they can before exploding into a galaxy. They can also turn into Launch Stars for Mario to launch into said galaxy.
*In Earthbound, Ness fights 5 cops to leave Onett (including Captain Strong) - in this fic, Captain Strong promoted the four who fought against Ness into lieutenants (Note: A Lieutenant is the rank that serves the Captain).
*In Chapter 1 of Mother 3, the forest surrounding Tazmily burns. Later on, the player realizes that Hinawa sacrifices herself to save her sons, and dies from Porky's Mecha Drago during the forest fire.
*In Chapter 1 of Mother 3, Flint (Lucas's father) rescues Fuel (Lighter's son) from a burning house.
*In the end of Chapter 3 of Mother 3, Lucas saves Kumatora and Wess (and Salsa) from the Pigmask Army by calling a baby Drago with a sharp whistle, who in turn calls for its mother.
*In Mother 3, Dragos are green, gentle T-Rex-resembling dinos that are native to Tazmily.
*In Mother 3, Kumatora (her name literally translating to "Bear Tiger") is one of the main protagonists in Lucas's party. In actuality, the moves Lucas uses in SMASH (PK Fire, PK Freeze, PK Thunder) are Kumatora's.
*In Mother 3, Porky Minch owned a Fan Club of women - one of whom liked to tickle him in the chin. Though sexual undertones are only implied, the word "harem" is explicitly in the title of the song that plays on the floor. Whether or not these women were brainwashed to love him is unknown.