Meanwhile:
A white van pulled into the parking lot of the hospital. The sunroof opened and there was a whir as a device rose out of it. A satellite dish appeared and spun, like some sort of odd detector, beeping and humming.
Inside the van, a large man tapped some buttons. "Agent P to Agent A. Do you read?" He asked, speaking into a radio.
"Loud and clear, P."
"Any progress on finding Excerebro Scrambellicus?"
"Attempting to check hospital records, P..." she paused on the other end.
"A?"
"It's the Nazi and a squad of interns... and oh..."
"What?"
"Sorry, I was distracted by an attending with... Awful hair. Very handsome, though... Kinda dreamy..." She sighed. "I could be his intern any day..."
"Reed!"
"Sorry! and it's agent A remember?"
"Whatever. We have to focus if we want to find Scrambellicus before J and K do, alright?"
"Of course. What should I do?"
"Hang on, I've hacked into their personnel files. We've got an agent on the inside, Big Bird. She may be able to help us." He tapped some buttons on the screen, and an image of a smiling resident came up. "Goes by... Heron. I'm sending her pic now." He clicked 'send.'
" OK," I'll get back to you as soon as I have more info."
"Roger."
"Over and out."
xxx
"Let me get this straight..." Bailey pointed a pen at Meredith, who was currently inhabiting Mcdreamy- er Dr. Shepherd's body. "You want to cancel all your surgeries today?"
Meredith cleared her throat and tried her best Derek impression, "uh, yes."
"Even the corpus colostomy scheduled this afternoon?"
Meredith leaned against the counter and nodded. "Yes."
"And you've booked up the CT and the MRI for the next four hours?"
She looked Bailey up and down, and tried to be smug. And a little flirty. Like Derek was when she fell for him. Not that she wanted Bailey to fall for him, but... She wanted to do the thing. The Mcdreamy thing... "Mm-hmm, yes." She tried.
Bailey shook her head. "And you want Grey. And Yang? It's Yang's day off."
Crap..."uh..." She stammered. She needed Cristina. Well she had Cristina, in George's body, but she'd come to the conclusion that it was quite possible that Derek was in Cristina's body. Which was... "Ow!" She exclaimed, turning around.
" Sorry, Dr. Shepherd, Bailey... But I never... I mean Cristina never takes a day off anyway." Cristina in George's body said.
" Yeah," added George in Meredith's body. "She's Dr. Yang, she never takes a day off."
"Right?" Meredith pleaded.
"Yang?" another voice said, accompanied by the click- clack heels that she knew too well. Addison. Crap. Crap crap crap. McMeredith looked up, down, around... Anywhere but at Addison. "I just saw her in the elevator. Eager to work, that one."
"Great! I'll have her paged!" She whirled around, knocking into her entourage, "thanks for all your help Bailey!" She pushed through her friends awkwardly, trying to get as
"Now hold on, I did not approve-"
"Derek!" Addison called after them. "We have to talk!"
"Super secret study!" Meredith hustled along to the elevator. "Can't talk now, we'll talk about this later..."
"Derek Christopher Shepherd!"
"Bye!" It was too late, and much to Meredith's relief, the elevator door closed.
xxx
Derek in Cristina's body tapped his foot while he waited for the elevator. He'd managed to escape both Burke and Addsion and drop off a vial of his blood to the lab.
Or was it her blood? Whatever.
Now he just had to find Meredith.
Or himself.
Or take a scan of his brain. He sighed, and entered the empty elevator. It pulled up to the third floor and the door opened. "Meredith!"
She looked behind her, and then ran her hands over her body. Derek swallowed.
"Oh. Uh... that's me," she said, " but it's not. Now, which one are you? Because I'm George in Mere's body, and Cristina's in my body, Mere's in... Wait."
Derek blinked. What was Meredith yapping about? He really just wanted to kiss her. But check it, Shepherd, he told himself. He wasn't in his own body.
"Please tell me you're Dr. Shepherd..." She said.
"Yes," he croaked. So this thing affected more than just him?
"Oh thank God..."she said, looking very relieved. "Because we just took some scans...And there is something very, very, wrong with our brains."
"Oh," he managed. Meredith looked... Well she looked...
"Dr. Shepherd? Are you alright? You look... hungry."
Derek shook his head. "I'm fine... Fine. O'Mere, I mean O'Malley. C'mon. I dropped a blood sample at the lab an hour ago. It should be ready."
xxx
A shadow crept through the tunnels, and a tiny red-haired agent slid along the wall."This is Agent K," she whispered into her wristwatch. "I have infiltrated Seattle Grace, and am attempting to gain access to a staff badge via bamboozling."
"Copy that," the smooth voice said on the other side. "I too, have found a target. Radio silence for 15 minutes."
"10-4" said Agent K. She tucked her radio in her pocket and peered around the corner at her target, a blonde leggy intern, deep in study, eating a cupcake. Bamboozling an opponent required her to be up close. So Agent K improvised. "Help!" She called out, clutching her throat... "I can't -," she gasped, stepping out so the intern would notice her. "Can't breathe!" she flailed dramatically, catching the eye of the intern.
"Oh my God!" The intern cried out, noticing the woman in seemingly dire straights. "Are you alright? It's okay... I'm a doctor-" she rushed over
Agent K clutched her throat and made choking noises, "can't... can't breathe!" She spun 360 degrees and dropped to the floor in pretend agony.
"It's alright! I can help!" The blonde rushed forward falling for the agent's trap. As soon as she got close enough, the agent pulled out a slim device and pulled the trigger. The blonde launched backwards, landed on the floor and jittered.
When she stopped, Agent K stood over her. "Hi, you've just been bamboozled. Now, remember, you're not a doctor, you're a patient. Your name is April... and you've just been admitted because... you're a hypochondriac. Now, you need to get back to your room, 213B. Oh, and you hate cupcakes... and anything cupcakey. Got it?"
"Yes," she said in a strange monotone voice.
"Good," Agent K smiled. "Can I have my badge now?"
"Here you go," the blonde smiled and handed over the badge.
"And the coat."
"Oh yeah," she giggled. "I'm not a doctor, I'm a hypochondriac. I really should go to my room now. Here, have a cupcake, they're delicious but I hate them."
"Thank you," said Agent K as she looked at the name badge. 'Isobel Stevens, Surgical'. Perfect. Now she just had to Meet up with Agent J and find Excerebro Scrambellicus before everything went to hell.