Today's chapter is more Daenerys centric.
I have heard the people and they are worried my Daenerys is nothing but a love interest and I promise you all this is not the case. Like I said this is our story, and your input is always welcome here. I'm trying hard to make sure that everyone's development is something that makes sense. I feel Dany wouldn't immediately come back being a badass bitch again. She murdered half a million or more people. I'd like to think that she would take a step back and be like who am I? Who is Daenerys Targaryen and how will the people remember her? Because our Daenerys isn't a 'mad queen,' she's better than that. Hope this chapter makes you guys get where I'm going with this story! See you guys tomorrow :)
Facing the light of day the next morning was hard, to say the least. In total twelve of Skinna's men, including Skinna himself, had fallen. Daenerys remembered many more men being involved in the initial attack but figured they all scattered after the storm, one Skinna was gone. Only two of Jon's men fell that night, but the loss was much greater on her side. Twenty-one Sisters of the Keep had fallen that night. Most of them were older, maybe twenties and older, but a few of them were kids. One of the ladies who fell was pregnant. Daenerys didn't think anything could feel worse than the day Sage died, and now she wishing that was true. The Sisters of the Keep mourned with heavy hearts. Many of them had nightmares, Daenerys included. Jon, Tormund and the surviving men he brought along with them stood for a few things to help the girl prepare funeral pyres and clean up the mess that the Thenn left behind. Once everything was said and done, it was time for Jon to head back to Snowhome and as much as it killed Daenerys to do this she had chosen to stay behind.
"Are you sure?" Jon had to double and triple check before getting on his horse. Daenerys knew there was no way he'd leave if there was just the slightest hint of uncertainty in her voice.
"Last time you asked me if I was staying I told you they needed me," Daenerys was looking out at the rest of the keep. Nothing had felt more like home to her in so long. Not across the Narrow Sea, not anywhere south of the wall, only here. She turned back to Jon and smiled ever so slightly, "But that's not true. I need them. The work I put into this place… it feels like a step in the right direction. Like washing my hands…"
"Who you were before-" Jon started but she quickly cut him off.
"Is who I still am. I'm still Daenerys Targaryen." Daenerys sighed as she looked into Jon's eyes her lips couldn't help but curl up again. "Maybe one day that name will mean something better.
"Daenerys-" Before he could say anything Tormund and Rosemary approached them.
"Thought you would ride off without saying goodbye, your Grace?" Rosemary walked over to Jon and hugged him goodbye.
"How about you Tormund," Daenerys looked at the large ginger man and smiled, "You need a hug goodbye too?"
"Nope, cause I'm staying." Tormund's face was serious, probably the most serious Daenerys had ever seen him. Jon looked confused as he and Rosemary broke their hug. Rosemary's face was calm like she knew in advance what he was going to say.
Jon got a little closer to him, "Forever?"
"And leave you, little crow?" Tormund smiled and gave Jon a big bear hug, "Of course not!" He put Jon down and patted his shoulder, "I'm just gonna stay here for a little longer, then I'll come home."
Jon smiled, and then looked around at the ones he stood close to. Everyone was staying but him and at that moment he felt a sense of loneliness. "Well, I guess I have a Kingdom to rule. Until next time." Jon started to head to his horse while Tormund and Rosemary walked away, leaving Daenerys standing there alone.
"Jon," he turned around to Daenerys call and before he can say anything he felt Daenerys put her arms around him, "Thank you."
Jon pulled her in closer. It was an unusual moment for both of them. Her touch felt as familiar as it did like a stranger, but at that moment Jon couldn't have wanted anything more. When the hug finally broke he couldn't help but feel full of hope. "You aren't the old you at all, you are better."
Daenerys smiled as Jon mounted his house. With a whistle, he and his men rode off back to Snowhome. She couldn't help but smile a bit as she watched him go. Maybe she was getting better after all.
A few weeks passed since Jon left. Since the attack on Widow's Keep. A lot had changed since then. Tormund had been teaching the sisters to fight. To use knives, bows, and swords. All the girls at Widow's Keep would know how to defend themselves. No one would feel helpless ever again, at least that was the promise that Rosemary had made to them. It was clear that after had passed it was Rosemary who was now the clan chieftain. The sisters loved her and constantly looked up to her for advice and protection. Daenerys would sometimes feel the same. In her mind, Daenerys would credit Rosemary with her change. Something about her presence made you want to work harder and be a better version of yourself. When it came to Rosemary, Daenerys always felt like she had something to prove.
Daenery fell to her ass, her pants dirty and ripped, She wore something similar to a squire, at least, that what Daenerys felt like she looked like. Rosemary told her she couldn't practice fighting in a dress.
And Daenerys felt like she was always practicing.
"You're too still, you need to move around more when you fight. Smaller, quicker targets are harder to punch and a lot harder to shoot an arrow at." Rosemary told her from the sidelines. "Again!"
In front of Daenerys was Parsley, the two of them had come to terms with each other after a few sessions of beating each other up for fun. Or at least that is what Rosemary told them they were doing. She said it was a sisterly way of getting over any bad blood. By the way that Parsley and Daenerys threw punches at each other, it seemed they still had a bit of bad blood between them. Where Parsley was quick and light, Daenery was stronger and could take a lot more hits, but all this training was exactly was Daenerys needed.
She never wanted to feel powerless again.
"I heard you were almost raped…" Rosemary came to her the morning after Jon had left. "I thought you were better than that."
"How did you-" Daenerys was stunned.
"Jon told me," Rosemary threw her a change of clothes, they were a pair of men's trousers and a blouse. "We are going to fix that."
Daenery looked at the clothes, then back to Rosemary. "How do you plan on doing that?"
"You're a dragon, Daenerys, be a dragon."
"Be a Dragon."
Those words rang in her ear with every swing of a sword, every bullseye with an arrow and every punch she landed. She was in a trance, high on this feeling of strength when she punched Parsley right in the face. The girl fell to the floor with a hard thud and Daenerys snapped out of her trance. "Parsley!"
"No I'm okay," Parsley spat the blood from her mouth, "But I think I earned a bath and a nap."
The two girls laughed and looked at Rosemary, whose face changed from stern to a smile. "Fine, you two are done for the day. Go clean up before supper."
Daenerys lent out her hand for Parsley to grab. Parsley smiled and took it, and Daenery helped her up. "You punch hard when you're in a daze."
"I'm sorry," Daenerys told her, inspecting Parsley's bloody lip, "At least I didn't break your nose."
"I bet the men in Snowhome would love a woman who could break his nose." Parsley laughed as the two girls headed back to their rooms to get ready for dinner.
Daenerys smiled as she walked along with Parsley, "I'm sure the men in Snowhome just want a woman who'd take care of their bloody noses."
"Do you think Jon's taken a wife yet?" Parsley asked. Daenerys gave her a bit of a confused look and Parsley chuckled, "Oh no I'm not trying to say… I just mean Jon is a King. Isn't a King supposed to have a Queen? You know… to make him babies, give him an heir… that sort of thing." Daenerys felt a touch bitter but Parsley made a point. Jon needed an heir, and not just because he was a king but because Jon was a Targaryen. The last male Targaryen. He should've been the King, but instead, he was theirs. The true North's King. It's his children who will be the next Targaryen's. Maybe they will do better than we did. "Daenerys…" Parsley's voice broke her out of her thoughts, "Wh-what about you? Do you think you'll get married one day?"
Daenerys smiled and shook her head no. "I was already someone's wife, a long time ago. I don't think I get another chance after that."
She had a different kind of nightmare the next night. Daenerys couldn't remember the last time she had a good dream. When she was first brought back she had nightmares about death. After Sage died she had nightmares about that. The ones she was having now were about Jon. About him dying, over and over again. No matter what it was she dreamt about, one thing always stood constant: her hands. Daenerys hands were always either stained or covered in blood. Sometimes it was the blood of the lost, sometimes of the fallen and forgotten. Most of the time, of those she had wronged. Daenerys didn't understand what the nightmares were trying to say but she had woke up on many occasions crying. That morning she woke up she felt an uncomfortable pain in her stomach. She went to get up and felt... strange. As Daenerys pulled the sheets off of her, Daenerys could see that the bed and her legs were covered in blood. For a moment she panicked, still thinking she was in a dream, but then remembered she was still awake and the bleeding wasn't strange at all. Ever since Daenerys had been brought back this would happen, she forgot the odd sensations and pains that came along with the bleeding but one thing was for sure.
If Daenerys could bleed, she could have children.
As Daenerys got out of bed, she rolled her eyes, frustrated with the mess she would now half to clean. She pulled all the sheets off the bed to see that the blood had seeped through and side. Just as she tried to gather things to clean the mess the bedroom door opened.
"My Queen," It was Kinvara, she was finally back, "I wasn't expecting to find you here."
Daenerys sighed, now embarrassed of her mess, "I'm so sorry about the bed…"
"No that's fine, I'm just confused," Kinvara watched as Daenerys struggled to clean the blood from the mattress, "I thought you would've joined Jon Snow at Wolvesden. Why are you still at Widow's Keep?"
"Widow's Keep is my home, If you don't want me in your house I can ask for a room in the main house." Daenerys should've figured Kinvara would return and want her own space back, but that wasn't Kinvara's concern at all.
"No, Daenerys," Kinvara stopped her, "You have bled again, you're alive again, why are you here and not with him?"
Daenery sighed and stopped cleaning. "If you're God brought me back just so I could bare Jon Snow's children then he doesn't understand who I am." Daenerys turned to Kinvara, a frustrated look on her face, "I am not a broodmare."
"I would never dare say you are, your Grace," Kinvara replied calmly, "but your fate is with Jon Snow." Kinvara smiled, hands clasped in front of her, "You can't run from it forever."
"I swore when you brought me back that I would be better. That I would change," Daenery crossed her arms over her chest and turned away, "and wipe the past clean from my hands. But-"
"But?" Kinvara questioned her.
Daenerys sighed, "But I feel like no matter how much I clean them, I can still see it… all the blood and all the death."
"Is that what you think you are?" Kinvara asked her, "Just fire and blood?"
Daenerys shook her head no, "My purpose must be greater than just a Queen Mother."
"If it's a purpose that you seek, my dear," Kinvara put a hand on her shoulder, "I promise you that you will find it, and what the Lord is asking for is so much more than you think."
Later that afternoon Daenerys and Kinvara readied there horses to make the travel to Snowhome. Right before they left, Rosemary came to see them off.
"If his castle is nicer then the Keep, I won't be offended if you stay." Rosemary joked as Daenerys tightened her bag to the horse's saddle.
Daenerys smiled and turned around. "Nothing will ever feel more like home then this Keep, and don't you worry, I'm coming home."
"I know you are." Rosemary smiled as she leaned in to hug Daenerys.
As Daenerys held her, she could feel that something with Rosemary had changed. It took her a second but then she could feel the bump. Daenerys eyes nearly jumped out of her head as she let Rosemary go, "Are you pregnant?"
Rosemary smiled, putting her hands on her little belly. "Aye, it seems this body can still provide."
Daenerys couldn't help but smile, but inside she also felt something else. She wasn't sure why, but she could've sworn it was the slightest hint of jealousy. "You deserve this, Rosemary."
"So do you, Daenerys," Rosemary took Daenerys hand and squeezed it, "you deserve happiness."
"I don't know-"
"Daenerys," Rosemary squeezed harder, "You have suffered enough. Your hands are clean, and even though the stains don't wash off it doesn't mean their dirty. It just means you don't get to forget."
Daenerys smiled and nodded, letting Rosemary go. She climbed on her house and before she turned to leave she looked back at Rosemary. "The father, who is it?"
Rosemary smiled and looked back, and behind them standing at the entrance of the Keep was Tormund with the biggest shit eating grin on his face. "Don't tell Jon, he wants to tell him himself."
Daenerys was confused, impressed and had a lot of questions but she kept all her feelings to herself and smiled. "I'll be back, Rosemary, I promise."
"No rush, Daenerys. We'll be okay while you're gone." Rosemary stood there with a smile on her face as Daenerys and Kinvara rode off.
As she rode away from Widow's Keep, she looked back to give her home a good look. She could see Tormund now standing next to Rosemary as the Keep got smaller and smaller the farther away she rode. She wasn't sure if Rosemary was right, but she made a good point. Daenerys would never forget all the things she had done in the past, but now all she strived for was to move on from them and find her true purpose, whatever that could be.