Chapter 31

The days and weeks following the twins' birth were a whirlwind. They all sort of blended together in a hazy grey fog; one day indistinguishable from the next, only broken up by milestones in their progress. The day that Eli came off the ventilator and took his first breath on his own; the day that Livy got her feeding tube removed; the day that they both were able to be removed from the incubator; and now, three months later, they are finally going home.

Rory was forever grateful for her family during the time of the twins' hospital stay, between her grandmother, dad, and Logan's parents, they were never alone. The time served at the NICU acted as a catalyst to bring the family closer than she ever thought possible.

Shira and Emily had been forces to recon with, and she was pretty sure the first few weeks there the nurses were absolutely terrified of them; thankfully, they didn't get anyone fired, and eventually looked outside of their fear and embraced the staff and trusted them to take the best care of Livy and Eli. They both doted on Rory, making sure she ate, took a shower, changed her clothes and walked outside to see the sunlight and get some fresh air at least once a day.

Rory spent most of her time with the kids battling with the guilt she felt anytime she went home. Logan was able to spend as much time as possible with them and make sure that at least him or Rory were there at any given time during the day so that the twins never had to know what it felt like to not have their parents there. The two of them had not spent much time together outside of falling into bed exhausted around midnight, only to wake-up by 6 to get to the hospital or work. Mitchum surprised everyone and volunteered for the night shifts, keeping watch over their tiny bodies and soothing them when they would fuss, allowing Logan and Rory to get some much-needed sleep.

Livy and Eli were definitely fighters, they had the strong Gilmore and Huntzberger blood running through their veins and it showed. They continued to defy the statistics, growing and progressing ahead of expectations by the staff. They had consistently hit their milestones ahead of schedule, and everyone was beyond relieved when they got the news that they would be able to take them home today; but also terrified. Home. They were going home, where they would not have the monitors, and the round the clock staff, and nurses, and doctors; just them. The thought terrified and thrilled her as she sat in the lobby, their double stroller with the two infant carriers snapped in, carseat covers over top to keep the cold New England air off the sleeping babies.

Logan pulled the SUV around and parked it in front of the double doors of the hospital, jumped out and ran inside to get the rest of his tiny family. He had sat in the car for at least 15 minutes, letting it warm up so Rory, Livy, and Eli would not have to get into a cold vehicle in the middle of one of the coldest winters in CT history. Rory put Eli behind her seat, snapping his car seat into the base snuggly while Logan put Livy on the drivers side. Rory climbed in and sat in the middle seat between the two sleeping babies and stared down at the tiny and perfect humans her and Logan had created. "We are going home kiddos, Mommy and Daddy are finally taking you home."

A single tear rolled down her cheek as she looked up and locked eyes with Logan in the rearview mirror. "You ready Mama?" he asked her, giving her an encouraging and excited smile. "Time for our next step in parenthood, doing it on our own!" he chuckled, trying to bring some of the happy emotions out of her, he knew her and knew that she was probably in the middle of an epic internal monologue spiral. "In Omnia Paratus, right?"

"You jump, I jump Jack." She smiled back. "Let's get our babies home."

The drive home was met with comfortable silence, the babies sleeping soundly with the motion of the car lulling them, and Rory just gazing between the two car seats, amazed with their tiny faces and the fact that they were finally out in the world.

Logan pulled their SUV into the garage and opened the back door to get Livy out, while Rory got Eli. The four of them walked into their house, together, as a family, for the first time; and when they walked through the door, their whole bodies relaxed, they finally felt at peace. Then the babies started crying. Livy needed changed and Eli was hungry; then Livy was hungry and Eli needed changed…and they followed that pattern every three hours for the next several weeks; with tiny naps in between.

Rory vaguely heard the sound of her cell phone ringing and lifted her head up, bleary eyed looking around for the source of annoyance that woke her from her well needed nap. She finally found the devilish noise making device underneath a pillow on the floor and picked it up. She groaned when she saw her mother's name flashing on the screen and begrudgingly answered the call. "Hello mother" she groggily answered the phone, something she definitely wouldn't have done if her brain had been functioning fully.

Lorelai could hear the sleep in Rory's voice and knew she must have woken her up; which made the awkward phone call that much worse "Oh, I'm sorry, were you sleeping?" she stumbled over her words, instantly feeling stupid; obviously she was sleeping, she has twin babies. But instead of stopping, in true Lorelai fashion she just kept going. "I mean obviously you were, you have babies, and babies don't sleep right? Especially when you have two of them, then you really don't sleep; I mean not that I know from experience or anything since I just had the one, but I would imagine that it is way worse…"

Rory cut her off before she could finish her thought "Mother, as much as I love to be woken up in the middle of one of my very rare daytime naps to the sound of your rambling; was there something in particular that you wanted? Otherwise I would like to…" before she could finish her sentence, the baby monitor lit up with the sound of one, then two baby's cries and Rory rolled out of bed and got onto her feet, trudging out the door and down the hall to the nursery. "Actually, I need to go, Livy and Eli just woke up and Logan's at work so I have double duty."

She didn't even wait for her mother's response before hitting the end button and dropping the phone into the pocket of her robe she had thrown on over top of her day-old pajama pants and old yale t-shirt. She did not have the mental energy to deal with her mother right now.

She walked into the nursery and turned on the lamp next to the rocking chair; she went over to the crib and looked down at her babies and the tiredness melted away, and she was overcome with the love she felt for these two tiny humans. They had found not long after coming home from the hospital that the two of them slept much better and stayed on a more in-sync schedule if they slept in the same crib. Obviously when they got older that would likely change, but for now it was working. She picked up Eli first, his little blonde head resting on her shoulder as she walked over to the changing table to give him a fresh diaper. He started sucking loudly on his fist, the first indication that it was time to eat. She changed him as quickly as possible then swapped him out for his sister, giving her a fresh diaper as well. Her bright blue eyes looking up at Rory and her little mouth forming into a gummy smile. She was always so animated when she first woke up, a trait she definitely did not get from her mother.

Once both of them had fresh diapers, she put one in each arm and headed downstairs to heat up some bottles. Because of the extended time in the NICU, they were not able to breastfeed; between their necessity of being on a ventilator and in incubators to how tiny their little mouths were, it just hadn't been in the cards. Rory had not taken that as defeat though, and had religiously pumped every two hours, filling bottle after bottle, bag after bag, and she now had quite the breastmilk stash in the deep freezer and she continues to add to it daily. It may not be the typical breastfeeding relationship, but it worked for them. Plus, it gave Logan more opportunities to help, giving Eli a bottle while she fed Livy, or vice versa.

She reached the kitchen and pulled two bottles out of the fridge, placing them in the bottle warmer and heating them up. Since it was just her this afternoon, she had a moment of panic on how she was going to manage to feed them both, just as her newest member of the staff walked in.

"Good Afternoon Mrs. Huntzberger, I see the babies are ready to eat, would you like me to help you?" The sweet older woman asked in the most soothing and comforting British accent. Rory and Logan had decided that while they did not want their children raised completely by a nanny, that Rory could definitely use the help, so they had went with a cliche and hired a British nanny.

"Oh Margie, I have told you, please call my Rory. And yes please, that would be wonderful. I am not going to lie, I sort of forgot you were here and was having a mini panic attack trying to figure out how I was going to feed them both at the same time." Rory laughed lightly and pulled her hair up into a messy bun on the top of her head. "I will take Livy, if you will take Eli, how does that sound?"

"Gladly Mrs. . . " Margie caught herself and corrected "…Rory. Looks like the bottles are ready, would you like to feed them in the living room? That way you can sit back and be comfortable?"

Rory nodded her agreement and the two of them made their way to the living room. What had been a stylish and functional space was now overrun with baby swings, bassinets, and boppy pillows as well as a diaper changing station and baby monitors. Thanks to the full time staff, it was not in complete disarray, but it was definitely a different looking space from a few months ago, and she absolutely loved it.