Sarahduh518: oh man, it wasn't my intention for that part (the promise) to be tear-jerker but what I can say for now is Yzak has to believe in that promise she made :)

Btw, I initially considered having Yzak to coax her but decided against it, it's too OOC. The impression I have about him is that he's very straight-talking. Even when it comes to the two important women in his life, he won't be able to coax to save himself. He remained straight-talking but perhaps, in a nicer tone or sounding desperate (like in this chapter, he's lost and at his wit's end).

Monkeyheart3: You're so right about the parallels and Ukraine! There are some similarities and I hope you'll enjoy reading this chapter (it was tough to pen out given the amount of dialogues)... AND YES, there are FLUFFS. Hope you like it, hehe!

On Ukraine, I'm saddened beyond words that such atrocities happened in this modern age. I may not be very advanced in my age but I believed we came a long way from the previous world wars. It's terrible. Anyway, Yzak's stand is exactly what you've mentioned, realistic and practical (probably because I've seen Too Much scenes in the anime, where Lacus was going on about her idealism etc.), I cannot stand it, oops.

Chapter 12

"One of them was Chloe."

His words rang loud and clear in her ears. She cannot believe what she's hearing. "Chloe? As in the Chloe who happens to have the same family name as me."

Yzak nodded quietly, eyes fixed on her and watching intently.

She felt someone poured a bucket of ice cold water on her. She couldn't put a finger to the overwhelming emotions that stirred within her.

Disbelief. Shock. Anger.

She doesn't know why she felt angry. Neither was she certain if there was jealousy in the mix because what he was sharing with her now was about his one-night stands. It wasn't the same as being in a committed relationship, like the one had with his ex-fiancee, where they got to like each other enough to be like every other couple. From what she understood, most couples have feelings for each other, shared common goals and dreams and evaluating whether the other party is someone they want to share the rest of their lives together with - that's why they stay with each other, it's not entirely because of sex or physical attraction.

"Shiho, talk to me." His voice snapped her out of the mental rambling. "You've gone quiet and tense." He felt her hands held captive in his turning into tight fists. He let them go and slid his hands up to her arm and gently nudged her, as he looked straight into her eyes.

"I'm trying to rationalise what you've just shared with me." She said, surprised to hear her voice was strained with anger.

The platinum blonde in front of her shook his head, "I don't want you to rationalise. What are you thinking or feeling right now?"

He leaned his head against hers as his hands made their way to hold Shiho's face tenderly. "Talk to me please… I don't know what's going on in your head or with your feelings."

Even though she had no idea why she was feeling angry, it simmered at his pleading. He sounded like he was totally okay if she lost grip on her temper and exploded at him.

"I don't know how to describe exactly how I'm feeling right now." She revealed, as she pushed his hands off and held her head in her palms. "The best word to describe it is upset…" She exhaled a tired-sounding sigh, as her fingers rubbed a spot above her eyebrows, "I'm not feeling good about what happened between you and Chloe… of all people."

The platinum blonde standing in front of her was at a loss as to what he should do. It was clear that she needed space but at the same time, he didn't want to be a jerk by going along the line of 'look, that was in the past.' Even though it was a fact, he didn't want to use that card to brush it off and cause it to be a thorn (sore topic) between the two of them. Her temperament won't let him sweep it under the carpet too. He has to get her to open up to him, no matter how clumsy his attempt may turn out to be.

He went around the counter stool that she was sitting on and wrapped his arms around her to press her back against him. "I'm sorry for what had happened, Shiho. I didn't…"

He pulled her closer and buried his face between her neck and shoulder, "I didn't know there was some… I don't know, bad blood or something between you and Chloe back then… and now that we are together, I regret it. I really do."

When it comes to such matters, he wasn't good with his words. He was too used to speaking his mind and right now, he wished he had a portion of Dearka's skills. "I didn't mean to upset you but I don't want to lie to you about my past either." He revealed the dilemma he had, "tell me what I can do now to make it up to you."

It took a couple of seconds before she dragged her palms down her face and cast a sideways glance at him. A pang of guilt stabbed deep into his chest at the dullness in her usually bright purple eyes, as he stole a peek at her from his position.

How he wished they were burning with anger, instead of drowning with disappointment and something else, which he couldn't put a finger to.

"I may not be in a relationship before but I wasn't expecting you to be celibate… this is something I want to be clear about." She said awkwardly.

"I just…" She paused and placed her hands on his arms, "didn't expect you to be with someone who made my growing up days miserable… it felt like… she was here to aggravate me again, when it wasn't my fault or my doing to begin with."

Although she had his full attention, there was confusion and a desperate attempt to understand her written all over his face. It struck her instantly that the best way to get Yzak to grasp what she had shared, was to reveal about her background.

Her hold on his arms tightened, she wasn't sure if she needed support or it was out of anxiety. "I know I shouldn't be upset with you when it was a one night stand between the two of you, especially when it was before we got together but I…"

She swallowed and hesitated at the last minute. "I-I…" She shifted her attention away from him and looked at the floor in front of her. She didn't know what's going to happen to them, this relationship and more importantly, what he would think of her, after revealing her background.

Aside from the Hahnenfuss, no one else knew about her background except for Chloe's circle of 'friends', Nicol and Lacus who were her childhood friends, and Cagalli whom she grew close to during their time together at the Royal Academy of Fine Arts.

From what she knew and observed about Yzak, he was the only child who grew up in a warm loving family, even though she heard his father was KIA in a classified mission.

Would someone like him be able to understand her and her dislike - in simple words, towards the Hahnenfuss? Except for old madam hahnenfuss, who was her paternal grandmother and the only one who took care of her in that family, and ensured whatever privileges Chloe has, it was extended equally and fairly to her as well.

Will he feel embarrassed or worse, ashamed by who she is?

The last straw for her would be the look of disgust on his face, just like how Mrs Hahnenfuss, Chloe and the staff who serve them would look whenever she crossed paths with them within the mansion.

"You can tell me anything, you know." His voice brought out of her spiral of thoughts and the familiar warmth enveloping her made her realise that she was no longer sitting on the stool, but was on her feet. She couldn't see his face, but was imprisoned in his arms and his hard body pressed against hers.

She leaned her face sideways against his chest and listened to his heartbeat. She didn't know how this would turn out in the end, but she wanted to savour being this close to him seconds before coming clean with him.

"I wasn't a legitimate child… It wasn't even mutually consensual." She felt her throat tightened as she tried her best to share what had happened. "My mother gave me away after she found out about his identity. She pleaded with his mother to take me in because with education and being a Coordinator means I could reside in PLANTS and get to choose how I want to live my life."

She closed her eyes, quietly willing the memory of the day she found out about her mother's existence, how the special bento meal she enjoys on her birthday every year was from her, and why she gave her away. "She doesn't talk much about herself when I finally located her a few years back, before the tension escalated into the first war… but I understood that she didn't have much choice."

She placed her hands on his back and held on to him as though he was a lifeline. She had never felt so vulnerable before. It was too revealing and uncomfortable.

"When we were kids but old enough, Chloe saw me as a threat and pulled all stops to make sure I knew I didn't belong in the family and wanted me gone." She could understand why she behaved the way she did when she was a child, especially when Mrs Hahnenfuss was fueling the behaviour.

"It continued, even when both of us were approaching our teenage years, where someone reasonable would understand that I didn't mean to 'ruin her family' or 'compete with her' for inheritance." They were old enough to clearly differentiate what is right from what is wrong but Chloe chose to play the victim and played the blaming game, aka being the bully.

"I tried to reason with her more than I could remember but she refused to acknowledge that her father was the one at fault. Had he not forced himself on my mother, how on earth would I have existed, right?"

"Nothing changed, she kept up with her hostility towards me. It was beyond me to forgive." She added, her voice strained with anger and hatred. It was clear to Shiho that her half-sister was beyond reason, so she gave up trying to have a cordial relationship with her.

"Even though I had grandma and my late mother who would prepare a birthday bento for me every year and disguise it as something my grandma had the staff to prepare… There were times I wished I had the family that she has, a mother and father who were always eager to welcome her home, to celebrate every achievement she gained - no matter how insignificant it was, even though they have no feelings for each other as a couple."

"There were many things she had that I didn't and yet, she doesn't leave me alone…"

It brought back many unpleasant memories which she managed to keep them buried, due to the intense nature of her role as a ZAFT ace pilot.

Perhaps, that was why she was upset when Yzak shared that he had a one-night stand with Chloe.

"There were times I wished grandma wasn't being fair, so I don't have the same last name as Chloe and I don't have to attend the same school as her…"

"Then I didn't have to put up with many other copies of her in school. Even if I scored better than everyone else, I was still 'that Gen 1', 'that half-breed'." She closed her eyes and took several deep breaths. She didn't want to revisit all those memories anymore.

Feeling ridiculous at the likely reason behind her anger towards Yzak, she went ahead and shared it anyway. She had already revealed this much about herself and he wanted to know what was going on in her head and her feelings.

"That's probably why I was upset, Yzak. It felt like she had you too… She had something I wanted for myself, again." She pulled back to look at him and a tender expression crossed his face. An expression she'd never seen on him. He looked as lost as she felt, as lonely and in need of love too.

He cradled her head to his chest and kissed the top of her head. She froze, left her hands dangling useless at her sides. She'd never been held like this, not by him. But then, she'd never exposed her vulnerability before.

Would he be able to accept her for who she is? An illegitimate child and a Generation 1 Coordinator.

"She never had me, Housenka." His other hand gently slid across her back and pressed her against his body, forcing her to look up and into his eyes. "Not when I have you. The only person who has me is you. That's why we are together, remember that."

She drew him towards her with the surprise swirling in those pale amethyst orbs. He leaned in, lips brushed against hers, softly, delicately, like butterfly wings, just long enough that he could inhale her breath, feel the warmth of her skin, and the taste of drink she had earlier.

He kissed her, softly at first, and then with a swift intensity that made her cling to him as though he was the only solid thing she could hold on to in this world. His insistent mouth was parting her shaking lips, sending jolts along her nerves, evoking from her sensations she had not felt in a while. Since the time they first kissed and made-out at her temporary apartment provided by ZAFT, in space.

Her heartbeat skidded, and it was she who leaned greedily into the kiss, she who slid her arms around his shoulders and her fingers through his hair, as she'd wanted to do since she first saw him with his new haircut.

His breath went ragged and the kiss grew dark and deep. His tongue slipped in, caressing hers. He took her by the waist and lifted her up onto the counter so that her face was level with his.

There is a spark in his gaze now, that darkening of his eyes, something fiery and hungry, something that wants. He hesitates for an agonizing second. Then, his head tilts down toward her. The soft skin of his lips pressed against her, and before she could even register it, he was kissing her again.

She could feel the rapid beat of his heart and taste the sweetness of the drink she had earlier. She wound her hands into his hair again. His hair curled around her fingers, silky and fine.

Her heart was hammering, and there was a rushing sound in her ears, like beating wings. All she knew was she wanted to be close to him and feel the warmth of his hard body on hers. She wrapped her legs around waist and urged him closer towards her, earning a loan groan from him.

As soon as the sound leaves his throat, he's pressing her harder against the counter. His hand was on the back of her head and the other slid down her waist, and further down caressing her thighs, suddenly pulling her hard against him.

His warmth, the pressure of his lips on her, the way his hands caressed and squeezed her hips and thighs were all too much. So much. Good much. So good. She whimpered.

He pauses for a moment, and her eyes flutter open, and he smiles, so she smiles back. And then he leans in to give a quick kiss on her lips, sweet and feather-soft. "I didn't mean to upset you… I made it clear to her and the last time I saw her, I was firm about it too. You have nothing to worry or have second-thoughts about."

The brunette nodded. A part of her felt silly about her reaction, but it wasn't something she could control or rationalise her way out. She felt the anger boiling in her and she was glad that she let it out.

She felt his warm palms on her cheeks, lifting her head slightly so she was looking at him. "I'm sorry to hear about your mother and what had happened growing up…" There was no disgust or any of that sort in his eyes. She didn't want to buy into the warm loving gaze he had for her.

She held his hands to her face and briefly closed her eyes at the feel of his thumb caressing her cheek tenderly. "Are you uncomfortable about who I am? I'm a Generation 1 and an illegitimate child, it's a mess."

"Look at me," he gently squeezed her cheeks.

He was frowning, looking annoyed as hell while he held her gaze squarely. "It doesn't matter to me. I've known you over the two wars, I know you're a good person, Housenka."

"I don't care about your genetics and your background. I'll not allow it to become an issue for us too, so don't let it bother you. I like you for who you are, Shiho." He gave her cheeks a gentle squeeze again to emphasize his point, dropping a quick kiss on her lips.

"You have no idea how happy I am that you chose me and I found out in time before you gave up."

End of Chapter 12

Author's note: Hello there! This staycay portion is turning out to be longer than I had expected (just look at this chapter!) but I doubt y'all are complaining because of the fluff (right?) and having to witness how our main leads are opening up to each other, yes?

This chapter was a tough one to write because I wanted to make sure there was a balance of showing their thoughts, expression with their actions. The fluff too! It has been a long while, so I hope you will go easy on me regarding that.

Did you enjoy this chapter? What do you think of it?

Was the reaction of Yzak and/or Shiho something you had expected? What surprised you? What do you like the most about their interaction?

Looking forward to reading your reviews / comments!

See you in the next chapter :)