Synopsis: With his time now explicitly limited Geist decides to continue towards Kazdel with or without his belongings. But he quickly finds out his past may end his travels before they even begin.

Warning: This story will contain profanity, dark/adult themes, and blood/gore.

"Thoughts"

(Radio chatter)

[-~-] pov change

[-] short time jump (like 2 characters sitting in awkward silence)

[scene or substantial time change]

If everything is in italics then it's either a memory/dream or hallucination.

Ghost of the slums

Chapter IV

He couldn't sleep…

Once Blaze had left he promptly moved himself onto the floor, opposite side to the door.

Just as a precaution…

But that didn't help him sleep. Like hell he could. Sleeping aboard a land ship filled with people that - not long ago - would have killed him without a second thought? He wouldn't be caught dead.

And so he simply lay there, doing all he could to keep his mind blank as the concept of time muddled into nothingness. The only thing that kept him from completely zoning out was the anticipation of the rising sun. As with that, he could retrieve his gear and make his way towards Kazdel.

Whether or not he actually received his equipment didn't matter, as most of it was worn to shambles anyway. The only thing he truly wanted back was his rifle, although it was next to useless - being out of ammo - unless he wanted to sword fight with its awkward bulk. And he would be hard-pressed to find compatible ammo outside of Ursus.

Lungmen allowed him a surprise break, as some of the LGD special forces used the export model of his rifle. Which made acquiring ammo relatively easy, once he found a source willing to sell to him. But now, now that he was on both countries' shit lists, the gun wouldn't be much besides an intimidation device for would-be muggers.

"Wonder if I could request my stuff now…" Geist wondered, further disappointed by the lack of sunlight.

As much as he enjoyed the hospitality, it felt wrong. He felt naked laying in just the provided shirt and pants. Used to years of sleeping in his coat, boots, and whatever else he could find to keep warm. A stark contrast to his current conditions, receiving better amenities than the army had ever given.

"What is his motive?" He wondered, thinking back to the offer from the Doctor.

Geist was suspicious after waking up not behind bars. Even more so after he was asked to join Rhodes Island. And so Geist had a gut feeling the Doctor was up to something.

"I don't have time for this…" He decided, easing himself to his feet with a grunt.

If what the feline doctor said was true, he had give-or-take a month to live. Which was about the same amount of time it would take to get to Kazdel. That's if his current plan worked, which was to find a caravan or messenger traveling in the same direction willing to hire him as temporary protection.

He had done the exact thing when escaping to Ursus. It was a good business and many people wouldn't turn down having another set of eyes.

As long as they didn't know his gun was empty…

But he had to escape first, although he already ran into issues, as he had to remind himself how the doors worked. Quickly thinking back to how Blaze did it reminded him of the touchpads at the sides and with a light tap the door opened up. He gave the hallway a scan and made sure it was empty before slipping from his room.

Without his overenthusiastic escort, he would have to do some wandering to find wherever his gear was stored. If he had to guess, it would be locked in an armory or some sort. But he had a feeling the more challenging part would be getting his stuff out.

[-]

As it turned out, navigating the landship was fairly easy. The combining factors of its simple layout, directional signs, and information kiosk made finding the armory dangerously simple. Although, he had to remind himself this wasn't a military facility.

At least on paper…

But after fighting them multiple times, he had to wonder why a 'pharmaceutical company' would hire as many combat operators as they did. Although he supposed Terra wasn't the most forgiving place. So he could understand their concern to be well protected.

And so hopefully they could understand his.

That was if the armory was even open at this time, but being what it is, there should be someone stationed at it around the clock. His assumption seemed to be accurate, as in the distance he could see a soft light coming from the back room. Contrary to most of the strange shops he passed on the way here.

The front desk was empty, unsurprising at a time like this, but he could hear distant sounds of activity just past the threshold. As such, ringing the service bell was the most obvious course of action, which he gave two taps without any response. Prompting him to ease himself closer, peaking through the doorway.

"Oi! That's my rifle!"

All politeness was thrown out the window as he laid eyes on a hooded girl sitting at a table with his gun completely disassembled in front of her. She jumped in response to his confrontation, ears and tail going rigid out of surprise. A moment later she looked at him with a frustrated look.

"And it's in terrible shape," The girl replied, matter of factly. "I would expect a trained soldier to maintain their equipment better than this."

"I had other priorities." Geist shot back, moving towards the table as they stared in awkward silence.

She gave him a blank stare as she shifted the candy from one side of her mouth to the other. "What exactly is your need at this hour?"

"My stuff." He replied, motioning to his disassembled weapon.

In reply, she stood from the table and moved over to a computer terminal, exoskeleton on her lower half emitting a low whine as she did.

"What's your name?"

"Geist."

The girl then filled in a few blank columns before shifting the candy once again. "Without a higher ranking operator or staff member with you, I'm afraid that's not possible."

Geist's frown deepened at her comment, Rhodes Island sweatpants wouldn't get him very far, but his gut was telling him he needed to leave.

"Although, it looks like your other belongings are cleared through, clothes, armor, and whatnot." She mentioned, turning to him with a questioning look. "But they told me you would be coming here in the morning with Blaze?"

"Couldn't sleep… and these pants are terribly itchy." He bluffed, hoping she wouldn't delve further.

"You're not wrong about that." She replied, turning back to the computer with a hum. "Well… I could get your other items for you if you'd like? Looks like they are done being cleaned."

As she finished, she turned to him once again, although something in her eyes changed as she adjusted to look up to him.

"How hard would it be to somehow subdue her… looks like she is already physically weak judging by the electronics supporting her legs." A voice rang in his head, the noise weak and distant.

"No…"

"Just kill the damned brat, she has no right to keep from you what is yours!" The voice called again, this time louder.

"Shut up."

"Erm… Are you ok?"

Geist flinched as he blinked a few times and noticed she was giving him an odd look. He closed his eyes and took in a deep breath to steady himself.

"Da, fine…" He answered after opening his eyes.

"O- ok then, I'll grab those for you."

Geist then moved himself back to the receiving side of the counter, thinking he already creeped out this poor girl enough. Luckily she didn't leave him to his imagination for too long, coming back before shortly with an armful of rags. Rags that he recognized as his uniform. Along with that, there was a distinct thud as she set the stuff down, most likely the armored mask he wore.

"So you must be the one from the Reunion battle a few days ago?"

"...Da."

"Im Glaucus, resident weapons engineer and tester. Say… that weapon of yours is pretty interesting," She mentioned, a curious glint in her eyes. "I've never seen a Ursurian using such, did you buy it from someone in Lungmen?"

Geist frowned, it seemed the stereotype of primitive Ursus equipment was more widespread than he thought.

"No. That's Imperial Army equipment." He replied, gesturing behind her. "The one's from Lungmen are the export model."

"I never knew Ursus had such weapons…"

His jaw clenched as he tilted his head. "You think the whole empire was built off of swords and crossbows?"

"Well no, that's just the only-" She started, but paused when she noticed his look. "Er… That's not what I meant, I was just surprised to learn of a Ursurian built firearm."

Geist grunted in reply, reaching his arms around to gather his pile of belongings. Without any further comment, he turned to head back when Glaucus spoke up.

"You forgot this…"

He looked back at her claim and what he saw instantly caused his mood to sour ten-fold.

In her hand was the only medal he ever received during his service. One that he always kept hidden in his coat inside pocket, because the sight alone made him sick with regret. The medal itself resembled the country's double-headed eagle insignia with a colored ribbon and was usually fastened to the wearer's uniform during formalities. It was one of the few emblems that he kept still associating him with Ursus.

But this one he would never forget because that would mean forgetting the most important day of his life.

Which also was the worst day of his life.

The day he failed… and his failure cost the lives of his whole team.

"It's yours… right?"

Her comment snapped him from getting enraptured in thought. Prompting him to reach out and grasp the medal as if it were fragile as glass. He then stood there, awkwardly staring at his palm before he let out a breath and moved to leave.

"...Thanks."

"Your… welcome? Oh and don't worry, your rifle will be done in the morning."

His steps echoing through the halls was the only response Glaucus received.

[-]

A quick trip to the restroom and Geist was feeling slightly more comfortable. Easing himself into a stride as he walked the empty hallways. No longer dressed in the borrowed clothes of Rhodes Island, he wore the familiar uniform of his cursed motherland as he ventured back to his room.

A couple of passing windows allowed him to see the sun had yet begun to rise but with any luck Blaze would turn out to be a responsible 'elite operator' and could escort him to get his rifle early. Hopefully, she wasn't a late sleeper, as he had run out of things to stare at in his room.

But if first impressions were anything to go by he wouldn't be holding his hopes high.

As he continued his room eventually came into view and at the same time his mind paused as he strolled up to it. A frustrated groan escaped his lips as he tried taping the display but to no avail. The damned keycard Blaze had left him was still on the nightstand.

"Blyat…" He cursed, letting out a defeated breath.

The neatly folded clothes fluttered to the ground as he dropped them near the door. Letting out a defeated sign as he coerced himself into finding something else to do while he waited for his charge to arrive. Perhaps he could help whats-her-name assemble his rifle, but that was likely against whatever protocol they held.

So instead he simply tasked himself with memorizing the simplest path off this landship for when he left.

[-]

As it turned out, finding an actual exit off this glorified nomadic hospital was harder than actually navigating the internal layout. Although the more he thought about it, the more it did make sense, as with the landship's 'mobile' nature meant one couldn't simply walk out the front door. Or he just had yet to find it…

But even after taking an elevator down to the lowest floor accessible he was still at a loss. And to make matters worse… somewhere along his travels a feeling of being watched grew within his gut. Watched by something other than the security cameras.

Of course, he couldn't blame them, but that didn't help him feel any better.

And so he continued, guiding himself through what looked like another section of operator barracks. Giving each room a curious glance in the odd chance he spotted Blaze's room, although part of him didn't really want to. And thankfully before he could, one of the directional sighs peaked his attention.

"Cargo bay. Hmm…" He thought.

The mental gears began to click and he decided to give it a shot, turning down the hallway to follow the sign's guidance-

When something caught his foot and caused him to all but faceplant. Groaning in pain past grit teeth as he was forced to catch himself with his injured arm. Even through the medication the pain still caused his vision to blur as he rolled himself onto his back. Easing himself to a sitting position as he cursed what or whoever caused this.

Although, the string of curses in his mother tongue came to an abrupt halt once he spotted the offending object.

To his disbelief, it was an identical - albeit tiny - replica of the 'friends' Mudrock used to summon.

"What the-? That's… that's not possible…" Geist tried reassuring himself.

But as the little golem recovered from the impact it looked to him as if Geist was someone familiar.

"There's no way! Nowaynowaynowaynoway!" He panicked, the first couple of attempts to regain his footing failing because of his sore body.

Eventually, he was able to get back onto his feet, but it was with the help of a pair of strong yet gentle arms from behind.

"I'm so sorry!" The voice of a woman spoke from behind, a voice that caused a chill to run down his spine. "Are you okay?"

Although he was standing on his feet again, the feeling of dread kept his body frozen in place. Part in hoping the person, he feared the identity of, would simply leave him be. But instead, the figure moved around to his front, all the while wiping debris from his clothes.

The woman was dusting off the front of his coat when her hands suddenly stopped as they passed over the emblem on his shoulder. They didn't remove themselves but instead remained stationary as her eyes opened wide with realization.

Her head snapped up, beautiful scarlet eyes gazing through his mask as hands grabbed fistfuls of his jacket.

"Donovan?!"

The name instinctively caused him to flinch, eyes and jaw clenched shut to the point of painful.

"Is that- is that you?"

He so desperately wanted to lie. Come up with an excuse. Tell her he found this armor off some dead guy in Lungmen. But he couldn't, he couldn't bring himself to lie to Mudrock. And so, he opened his eyes with an exhale and looked down to her.

"I- I go by 'Geist' now…"

Mudrock didn't seem phased by his comment, instead, she flashed a bright smile and pulled him tight into a hug.

"I'm so glad you're okay!" She replied, sounding on the verge of tears.

Geist's eyes squeezed shut once again, partly because of the pain her grip was causing his body but mainly because he wanted to return the gesture. But he couldn't, not with as many conflicting emotions currently coursing through his mind. So instead he just stood there until she was satisfied, desperately trying to hold himself together in the meantime.

Eventually Mudrock let up, keeping her hands latched to his sleeves as if Geist would disappear as soon as she let go.

"Oh- hehe sorry…" She caught herself, wiping his sleeves one last time before letting go.

"It's good to see you… Mudrock." He commented, failing to keep his eyes from migrating south, although most of her cleavage was covered by cloth wrappings.

She smiled again. "So you were the one from the other day."

Geist's head tilted slightly in a questioning manner.

"I watched the battle record after the first mission and… something about it reminded me of you."

"I see…"

An awkward silence washed over the pair as a flood of questions begged to be asked, but neither wanted to speak first.

"So… how did you end up with Reunion?" Mudrock finally asked, breaking the stalemate.

"They were… heading towards Kazdel."

"Oh…"

Geist hummed in reply.

"I wish there was a way I could have told you."

"How you ended up… here?" Geist asked, gesturing to their surroundings to which she nodded. "Aren't these the same people that drove us out of Leithanien…?"

"They are, and…" She let out a breath. "It's a long story. Perhaps we could share our stories somewhere a bit more comfortable? My room is just behind you."

Geist nodded in response and began following her once she moved past him, and true to her word, they only made it a half dozen steps before she turned into an open doorway. Trailing behind, Geist followed suit and cautiously entered. To his surprise, Mudrock's room was completely different from the one he was given, rather than his studio quarters hers was more akin to an apartment.

It was fully equipped with a living room, kitchen, and hallway that led to what he assumed would be the bedroom and bathroom.

After a few steps in Mudrock turned to him and flashed another smile. "Have a seat, I'll grab us some water."

"That's-" Geist started but caught himself as he noticed she was already moving towards the kitchen. "Nevermind…"

Doing as instructed, he moved towards the couch and softly sat down. Resting forward with his hands on his knees as he blankly stared at his palms. Thankfully, Mudrock didn't leave him to his thoughts for too long, coming back with two glasses in her hands and setting one in front of him.

She then moved back around the table and joined him on the couch, sitting close enough he had to ignore her earthy fragrance. "Sorry, I should have asked if you were hungry."

"I'm fine, thanks." Geist replied, thinking back to his meal with Blaze.

"Okay. Just let me know if you need anything." She stated, eyes drifting to her knees. "As for how I ended up here…"

"Not too long after we split ways, Rhodes Island actually came to our aid." She explained, idly playing with her glass of water. "And in exchange for treatment, I disbanded our group, gave up my authority, and became an operator."

"Quite the change from Wolumonde."

Mudrock hummed in response, looking toward him. "And what about you? What exactly happened after you and Zofia left for Lungmen?"

Geist instinctively dropped his head upon hearing his sister's name, hoping Mudrock wouldn't notice how he was forced to steel himself before speaking.

"We uh- we made it… eventually." He cleared his throat, attempting to keep his voice neutral. "I found work where I could, and Zofia… became something of a local doctor for the fellow infected that lived in the slums."

Mudrock smiled. "She was always such a good person."

That comment was another hit at his emotional stability, whether she meant it or not. He would have to leave soon, lest he embarrass himself in front of his old captain. But for now, all Geist could do in response was nod his head as his facial features scrunched up once more.

"Is she still there now?" Mudrock asked, voice filled with optimism. "Oh, and what about Isabel? How is she doing?"

This time, there wasn't any more pressure he could clench his eyes closed with to prevent the wetness from seeping past. But he didn't manage to still nod at her comment. Regardless of how she would comprehend his answer.

"Yeah- they're still there…" He managed to get out, voice naught but a whisper.

Which Mudrock didn't miss, judging by the worried look on her face.

"Did something happen?"

Geist nodded yet again. "I took a job that Isabel didn't like and she kicked me out… then before I could fix my mistake Reunion attacked."

Geist took in a shaky breath.

"Neither of them survived…"

When he glanced at Mudrock, her face had transformed into a mixture of horror, grief, and regret. "I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to-"

"It's not your fault… I know you would have done everything you could have to protect them. It was-" He paused, letting out a string of curses in his mother tongue. "It was my fault. I said things I shouldn't have and then left them to die. Heh… I couldn't even achieve the one thing I promised you…"

"No…" She said, reaching over and setting a hand onto his shoulder. "Donovan, I know you would never do something like that. Not if you knew the outcome."

Geist's brow furrowed as he clenched his teeth, shifting his body to look directly at Mudrock while also jerking away from her hand.

"Don't say that name… don't say that FUCKING name!" He said, facade crumbling. "Donovan Narlock is dead, he died in the sewers of Lungmen!"

"..." Mudrock didn't respond, only offering a sad look.

Why would she feel bad for him? He was a failure. And so, Geist didn't stop there. He began to aggressively remove his ushanka and faceplate, slamming them down on the table before locking eyes with her again.

"They lost their LIVES because of me!" He explained, raising a hand to the jagged scar on the side of his head, level with his eye. "And what did I get? Another FUCKNIG scar to show my cowardice!"

"..." She remained silent, compassionate look all but crumbling the last of his resolve.

"I'm a goddamn failure… I have been since-" He paused, body wracked by a sob as he buried his face in his hands.

[-~-]

Mudrock was at a loss for words, having been since Donovan removed his mask.

The look in his eyes made her feel like she had seen a ghost. His bright blue eyes, once eager and full of life, now came off as a dull gray. And behind that blanket of gray was misery, raw and pungent.

She felt guilty as well, as it was her order that led Donovan and his family to Lungmen. But now wasn't the time for self-pity, someone she held dear to her heart was broken down and beaten in front of her. She just didn't know how to help.

A thought came to mind that made her brow furrow with determination, scooting closer as the back of her mind hoped this wouldn't backfire.

Without sharing any words she brought him into another embrace, if all she could do was offer a shoulder to cry on then that's what she would do.

A shudder ran through Donovan's body as she did so, his muscles clenched but he took no action beyond that.

"...let me go…"

"I can't do that. You've been fighting this world all by yourself," She replied, gently using a hand to rest his head against her shoulder. "And I want you to understand that you are not alone, not anymore."

"You promise?" He all but whispered.

"Yes, I-" Mudrock started, but was interrupted as Donovan suddenly returned her embrace.

He wrapped his arms around her tightly, tightly enough that it actually caught Mudrock by surprise for a moment. But she recovered just as quick, bringing a hand soothingly to rub the back of his head. Hoping to offer any comfort she could as his body trembled against hers.

"Who you are and who you needed to be to survive are very different things."

Her comment caused his arms to tighten around her as if his own self-doubt could cause her to disappear at any moment.

"But-" He started, only to be interrupted by Mudrocks easing hush.

"It's ok." She reassured. "We all make mistakes in our pasts, but you mustn't allow them to remain in the present."

Donovan didn't reply, too busy holding himself back from completely breaking down.

"Here." She started, easing his tense mussels to allow them to lay back onto the couch. "You can stay here as long as you need, all night even. I won't leave you."

And true to her word they would stay like this until both eventually dozed off. Comfortably in each other's grasp as they awkwardly shared the small piece of furniture.

"Never again…"

Authorsnotes:

Greetings readers, I hope everyone had a good New Year and whatever happened between my last upload and now. I'd like to firstly apologize for the late upload, I had to edit and proofread this one myself, I also wanted it to slap. But here it is, the next chapter. I may not be 100% happy with it but I really wanted to get something out. It's a bit shorter than I'd like but it is still packed with lots of good development.

Nonetheless, I hope you enjoy it.

The next chapter will take a little bit of time to be completed as my life is still settling into the new place and work but my hope is less than a month.

*NEXT CHAPTER WILL GO LIVE 4/27*