Washington, D.C., May 2019
"Elliott Christine Marie Pope, we don't have time for you to play around with your food this morning. Your Tante will be here soon, and you won't be ready. Will you please finish your waffle so we can get you dressed?"
"I don't like it," her daughter complained.
Olivia sighed. Her baby was excited about today's outing with her aunt, and couldn't eat. It was why Olivia hadn't told her about the musical at the Kennedy Center until last night at bedtime. Well, that and the endless questions that she knew would come. Elliott was exhausted and could barely keep her eyes open. She didn't have the energy to ask any questions, before drifting off to sleep.
But, this morning was different. Olivia had awakened to a pair of deep blue green eyes and a crooked grin, staring directly at her. As she focused, Elliott giggled and began jumping up and down on her knees, on the bed, before the barrage of questions began.
Smiling at the memory, Olivia turned to her daughter and responded.
"Yes you do. You asked for a waffle without syrup." She stopped when she realized she was arguing with a four and a half year old. "Finish your fruit and drink that milk please." Olivia leaned against the huge tiled island in the center of the kitchen, sipping her tea. She watched Elliott pick the strawberries and grapes out of the bowl of fruit she'd also prepared, and pop them into her mouth.
"Can I have peanut butter, Mommy?"
"May I," Olivia corrected, "and, what else?" Elliott stared at her mother, then smiled and said, "Please."
'Yes you may." Leaning over, she kissed the tip of Elliott's nose before walking across the large chef's kitchen to retrieve her daughter's favorite organic treat from the pantry. Due to the "Nut Free" zone policy at Elliott's school, she only had peanut butter at home.
As the morning news played very low on the television in the kitchen, Olivia glanced over at the expanse of glass in the dining area, and looked out at the pool. Today would be a good day to spend in the water, but she couldn't, she had too much work to do. She turned her attention back to her daughter just as she was drinking the last of her milk.
"I'm finished, Mommy. The peanut butter waffle was very good."
Olivia smiled. The peanut butter, spread over the waffle, had done the trick.
"You're welcome baby." Elliott had eaten the waffle and the fruit, and drank her milk. Her child usually lingered over breakfast every morning, testing Olivia's patience, but this morning her excitement won out.
Olivia rinsed and placed the dishes in the dishwasher. Then turning to her daughter, who was climbing down from the bar stool, she said, "Come on sweet pea, let's find you an outfit to wear to the theater. Hop to it!"
Elliott began to hop on one foot. "Hop…hop… hop!"
Laughing at her daughter's antics, Olivia grabbed her mug of tea and followed Elliott as she "hopped" ahead of her towards the stairs. Her eyes narrowed in concentration. Every time she saw her daughter's crooked smile, she was reminded of Fitzgerald Thomas Grant III. Although she no longer had him, she had been left with a part of him. Elliott had inherited his hair, with its uncontrollable curl, the curve of his eyebrows, his nose, his laugh, and his even temper. The pouty lips and doe shaped eyes belonged to Olivia, but the deep blue green color was all Christine Grant. As long as she lived, Olivia could never forget her child's father. He lived in a smaller, feminine version named, Elliott Pope.
Upstairs they entered Elliott's bedroom and the child ran straight to her bed, jumped in and grabbed her beloved bunny, Bugs.
Olivia opened the closet door and started moving hangers, while Elliott was chattering away about something.
"What am I going to see again, Mommy?" Olivia had lost track of how many times she'd heard the question since waking up that morning.
She turned to see her daughter, all big blue green eyes and braided hair, sitting in the middle of her bed, playing with one of Bugs' ears. She took a deep breath before answering. "It's a musical called, "The Wiz Live! Remember, we saw it on television last week." They had watched it together, so Elliott would be familiar with it when she saw it on stage.
"Oh yeah. That doggie was so cute, Mommy." She giggled.
"Yes he was. But there will also be a lot of singing and dancing. Are you excited to see it?"
"Yes!" She tossed her bunny in the air for emphasis.
Olivia laughed at her baby and turned back to the closet.
"I want to wear my blue dress, Mommy." Olivia's hand had just passed over the navy, French styled, embroidered cotton smock dress that Elliott was referring to.
"Elle, are you sure?"
"Yes. P-l-e-e-a-a-s-e?"
"Okay, but we have to hurry."
Grabbing the dress and a pair of metallic silver Mary Jane shoes, Olivia closed the closet door.
"Okay, let's go brush your teeth, get you dressed and then I'll comb your hair." She reached out her hand to help Elliott down from the bed. Together they walked to the ensuite bathroom.
X
"You're all done, Sweet Pea," Olivia said, stroking her daughter's precious face.
"Do I look pretty, Mommy?" Elliott asked as she twirled around.
"Yes you do. Go look in the mirror and see what you think."
Elliott ran to the standing mirror in the corner of the room. Admiring her reflection, she smiled at the big navy bow that held the ponytail at the top of head, back off her face. The rest of her hair hung in blonde and brown curly waves down her back, a real novelty for the child. Her hair was usually worn in ponytails or French braids.
Olivia had just finished packing an overnight bag for her daughter when the doorbell rang. "There's Tante. Grabbing the bag and Elliott's hand, they both made their way down the stairs.
Olivia opened the door to find her sister standing there. Cecily stepped forward and kissed Olivia's cheek, before walking further into the house. Olivia closed the door behind her.
"Tante!" Elliott exclaimed. She stood on the next-to-last stair, grinning and clapping.
"There's my Patootie," Cecily said as she smiled and walked towards the child. Reaching out her hand, she helped her down to the floor.
"You look so pretty." She gave her a hug and kiss. "Hello love. You're getting to be such a big girl aren't you?" Elliott shook her head vigorously.
Turning to Olivia, who had been quietly watching, she asked, "So what are you doing for the next twenty-four hours, since you'll be childless?"
"I downloaded a huge case file last night and I need to review it without interruptions." She glanced at Elliott who was looking in her overnight bag.
"What? You have a childfree Saturday and you're going to spend it working? When was the last time you took some personal time? No Elle, work, just you?"
Olivia let out a sigh. "When I had mono last year." The work on a big case and being a single mother to an active toddler had left Olivia so mentally and physically drained, she'd come down with mono and had to be hospitalized for a few days. Thank goodness for her family. They had all stepped in to care for Elliott while she recovered. She'd promised them all and herself that she wouldn't allow work to affect her health and take her away from her baby again. She was close to being burned out.
"But no time for yourself." It was a statement, not a question.
"Cis I have a four and a half year old with an active social life and extracurricular activities, and a demanding career. I don't have time for "me time."
"Libby, please tell that to someone else. You know mom, dad, me and August, hell even Aunt Caro, are always available to look after Elle Belle."
"She is not your responsibility."
"We know that Libby, but, we're your family and we want to help."
"I know Cis, and I'll keep that in mind."
Changing the subject, Olivia walked closer to her sister.
"Look at you Cis, you're glowing." At thirty-seven, Cecily was pregnant with her first child. I can't get over just how pregnant you look. I haven't seen you in a week, and your stomach has grown tremendously."
Cecily chuckled. "To hear August tell it, I'm still not showing enough, although I can't get into any of my clothes. I'm five months already, with four to go and August is already irritating."
Olivia laughed at her sister's eye roll. "Enjoy it while you can Cis."
"Yeah. Whatever." She looked over at Elliott who had pulled most of the items out of her bag while they were talking.
"Alright Patootie, let's blow this popsicle stand!"
"Cis," Olivia hissed.
"What?" She laughed.
Cecily grabbed Elliott's hand while Olivia repacked her bag, zipped it and followed them out to Cecily's SUV. Cecily opened the door and assisted the child into the car seat she'd had installed for her beloved niece. Olivia placed the bag on the floor and then leaned over to kiss Elliott's cheek. "Goodbye, Sweet Pea. Mommy loves you to the moon and back."
"Bye, Mommy."
"Bye Cissy. You guys have a good time."
"We will Libby. You should try it too. I'll have her back tomorrow afternoon."
She stood in the driveway, waving as she watched the vehicle back into the street and drive away.
X
After three hours of reviewing documents, Olivia stood and stretched. It was too quiet in the house for a Saturday. She wandered around the house she'd purchased when Elliott was six months old. It was located in the Shepherd Park neighborhood, not too far from where she'd grown up. She'd wanted her baby to have a large backyard to play in and to grow. They lived close to downtown D.C. and Rock Creek Park, where she used to run with Elliott in jogging stroller. Her neighbors were diverse, and Elliott's best friend, Vida, lived across the street.
Olivia had had the house gutted and then worked with a contractor, designer and decorator to make it a home for her and her daughter. The only major requirement she'd insisted on was a chef's kitchen, because she was determined to learn to cook for her baby. And she had. Olivia discovered that she actually liked to cook and often hosted Sunday dinner for her family. She was reminded of the time she'd spent playing sous chef to Fitz while in L.A. Those were also memories she tried to suppress.
Walking into the kitchen, Olivia filled her tea kettle with water and went about the mundane task of boiling water for tea. While she waited for the water to boil, she leaned against the island, folded her arms across her chest and thought about what Cecily said.
It was true, she didn't take a lot of time for herself. After she became a mother, she didn't go out or date. To be honest, she'd rather stay home with her daughter doing nothing more exciting than watching a Disney movie…repeatedly. Olivia took her responsibility as a parent very seriously. She worked hard to make certain her daughter didn't lack love or confidence because her father wasn't in her life. She closed her eyes at that thought. It was a touchy subject with her. It was also something she didn't discuss with anyone, even her family.
The whistling from the tea kettle brought Olivia out of her reverie. Turning, she reached for the kettle, poured the hot water into her French press, added two Lapsang Souchong tea bags and allowed it to steep for five minutes. While waiting, Olivia allowed her thoughts to drift back to six years ago. She'd blocked a lot of what happened during the summer of 2013 from her mind. It was probably the lowest point of her life, which is why she didn't think about it often. It was her conversation with Cecily that had brought her here.
When Olivia arrived at the airport in D.C. from the Vineyard, the car and driver that she'd called before leaving Boston, was there waiting to pick her up. She still hadn't called Garrett to let him know that she was on her way home because she wanted to surprise him. When she reached their Dupont Circle apartment, she immediately realized that no one had been in the apartment since the day they left for the Vineyard. Concerned, she finally called him, but got voicemail. She left a message before ending the call.
As the hours passed and Garrett hadn't returned her message, Olivia called him again and left another message. She also sent him a text message before finally going to bed. For the next few days, to keep her anxiety at bay, Olivia unpacked, rearranged and cleaned the apartment. By Friday, she was resigned to the fact that he wasn't going to call her. It's why she didn't contact the police; deep in her heart she knew he wasn't missing.
On Saturday morning, Olivia was sitting in the living room sipping her morning tea when she heard a key in the door. Garrett walked in and stopped in front of her. She didn't look up at him for fear that she would break down, and she didn't want him to think that her tears were for him. They weren't. They were for her. It hurt to admit that she had been wrong and a fool for a man incapable of love. It hurt even more to think that after all this time Garrett hadn't really cared about her or her feelings at all.
He finally took a seat next to her on the upholstered blue wool-mohair Montauk sofa that had taken them almost a year to find. The expensive piece of furniture had been an investment towards their life as a married couple. They sat in silence for what seemed to Olivia like hours but in reality may have been five minutes.
"Liv this is probably the hardest thing I've ever done."
Her stomach sank.
"I want you to know that I believe that I love you and I know you're a wonderful person."
As Olivia watched him, tears flooded her eyes.
"But I can't be the man you want and need me to be. I can't give you what you want. I really thought that I wanted the same things. You know relationships have never been easy for me, but when you came back into my life, I thought I could do it. I thought you were it for me. But Liv, I can't. And knowing how much I'm hurting you right now makes me want to hurt myself."
He didn't say anything for a few seconds, expecting her to respond. When she didn't, he continued.
"I know I'm breaking your heart doing this, but I know it's the best thing for both of us. Really it's the only thing."
Sighing heavily, he finally broke the shocking and devastating news.
"She's pregnant Liv. Raquel's pregnant. I'm so sorry. I know I'm going to catch hell from my parents, and probably yours, for what I've done, but she's the woman I want in my life. I know that's this is hurting you deeply and I hope that one day you can forgive me."
As Olivia tried to make sense of the words coming from his mouth, she silently screamed, you bastard! I didn't believe you could be this cruel, and such a liar. How low can you get? You are a disgusting, sick piece of sh**.
She felt like someone had punched her in the stomach. Wide-eyed, Olivia opened her mouth but no words came out, so she did the only thing she could. She ran from the room before she threw up. After dry heaving a couple of times, she stood, closed the lid on the toilet and sat down.
She tried to catch her breath. She was stunned, speechless. For a moment, her mind went blank. A thousand questions went through her mind. How long had he and Raquel been seriously seeing each other? Had he never stopped loving her? In the end she knew it didn't matter. She'd been dumped by a man she thought she knew. A man she'd called herself in love with since her senior of high school, twelve years. And now she'd been kicked to curb for Raquel Lewis.
Parts of her wanted to strangle him for putting her through this and yes, his mother and father were going to give him hell. Serves him right, she thought. Her parents, on the other hand, would probably breathe a sigh of relief. Cecily was going to laugh herself silly…once she made sure that her Libby was okay.
Olivia was still too stunned to put a name on how she was feeling, but deep down inside there was a sense of relief. Yes, she was hurt and humiliated but if she was being honest with herself, she knew something like this was always possible with Garrett.
He'd rushed back to D.C. not for work, but to be with the other woman, who was waiting for him. The woman who was now carrying his child. That made her furious all over again. Garrett had betrayed her in the worst way. It was just as her family and friends had predicted. Every one of them believed he couldn't be trusted to honor her by being faithful. But Olivia trusted and felt that once they were married, they would prove everybody wrong. He had made her look like an even bigger fool than she felt she was. For that she would never forgive him.
A rapid knock on the door interrupted Olivia's thoughts.
"Liv, are you okay?"
She didn't answer. What did he think? How was she supposed to be okay?
"Liv I'm not leaving until you answer me."
Well she certainly wanted him to go. She heaved a deep sigh and stood to look at herself in the mirror before opening the door. He was leaning against the wall across from the door.
"Are you okay?" He asked.
She didn't move. She just stood in the doorway of the bathroom glaring at him for asking such a stupid question. How did he think she felt.
Trying to ignore the daggers she was giving him, he said again, "Liv, I don't know what to say, except I'm so sorry."
She finally spoke. "Sorry? Is that the best you can do? You're sorry you screwed another woman? You're sorry you got her pregnant? What else are you sorry for, Garrett?" She folded her arms across her chest.
"I'm sorry for everything. I never meant for any of this to happen." He took a couple of steps toward her then stopped as if he was too scared to get any closer.
"You never meant for any of this to happen?" Olivia spat. "You had unprotected sex with her, you meant for something to happen!"
"What do you want me say?" Garrett asked.
"Say something Garrett! She yelled. "Tell me why you asked ME to marry YOU when you knew all along that you wanted to be with another woman."
She walked out of the bathroom, past him, and walked into their bedroom. Garrett followed. She stopped abruptly when she saw his suitcases near the closet. She walked to the opposite side of the room and stood in front of the window, looking down as the busy street came alive with Saturday morning traffic.
"Get out Garrett! Just get out! Get out of my life! I hate you!"
He was shocked by her words and wanted to go to her but knew it was best to leave. He would come back later for the rest of his things. Walking over to the closet, he picked up his suitcase and suit bag and took them to the living room.
When he returned to bedroom, she was sitting on the side of the bed staring at nothing.
"I'm sorry again Liv. I hope that one day you can find it in your heart to forgive me." He walked out of the room before she could say another word.
When she heard the lock on the front door click, Olivia stood and ran to the bathroom. Falling to her knees, she vomited, before collapsing to the floor in tears.
Cecily was worried. Olivia had left the Vineyard on Monday afternoon. It was now the following Monday and she hadn't spoken to her since Wednesday, when she'd called her to see how she was doing and to ask her about Garrett. Olivia was evasive and told her she'd call her back. That never happened. Her calls and text messages to Olivia, since that day, had gone unanswered. If Garrett Davis had hurt her sister, there was going to be hell to pay.
As soon as the private car dropped Cecily and her husband off at their Columbia Heights home Sunday evening, she jumped into her car and headed straight to Olivia's apartment. She broke the speed limit driving to Dupont Circle, hoping against hope that she would find her sister safely at home.
Cecily parked in one of the visitor's parking spaces in the parking garage and was relieved to find Olivia's car parked in its assigned spot. She took the elevator to the eighth floor and when the doors opened she exited and ran to Olivia's door. Knocking for a full three minutes, she realized she was going to have to use the "nuclear option." When Olivia had attempted to give her a key to the apartment that she shared with Garrett, she had adamantly refused. Now she sent up a prayer and was thankful that Olivia had been persistent.
Using the key, Cecily opened and let out the breath she'd been holding when she saw her sister in the living room, curled up on the sofa. She was dressed in yoga clothes which she'd probably slept in, and crying. Olivia barely looked up when her sister let herself into her apartment.
She had never seen her sister this dejected. Olivia had always been full of life, at least until the last three months. Cecily fought the urge to take her into her arms and comfort her, like she'd always done. Nope. Her sister needed tough love. She walked over to Olivia, who hadn't moved.
"Olivia Carolyn Pope this is the second disappearing act you've pulled in a week. If you do it again, I will tell The Maya the real story of how her precious Lalique vase ended up in pieces." Her words had their intended effect. Olivia turned over opened her eyes and stared up at her sister. After a few seconds, they both burst out laughing.
"I thought that would get your attention. And don't worry your secret's still safe with me." She walked over and sat on the arm of the sofa and ran her fingers through Olivia's wild curls. Softly she said, "I have been worried sick about you. I want you to get up and go take a shower, while I fix you something to eat. After that we'll sit and talk." She stood and rubbed her hands together. "Now get to it."
An hour later, Olivia sat at the small island in the kitchen of her apartment, lethargic, but feeling better. She had been crying since Garrett walked out of the door. She had no more tears to shed. Then despair had set in. It was hard putting one foot in front of the other. All she'd wanted to do was sleep. The meal that Cecily had prepared for her was the first meal she'd eaten since Friday morning, and even now, she picked at the food on her plate as she told her sister about Garrett's betrayal.
Cecily had no comment when Olivia finished her story. Her silence made Olivia anxious and nervous because Cecily had opinion about everything. Maybe she was trying to spare her feelings.
"So you have nothing to say? Or maybe you have too much to say. Whatever it is, I deserve it. I deserve everything that's happening to me." Olivia sighed.
Getting up from her chair, Cecily picked up her empty plate, took it to the sink, rinsed it and then placed it in the dishwasher. She returned to her seat and looked at her sister tenderly before speaking.
"Libby, you know better than anyone how Garrett is. He's hurt you before so you knew he was capable of doing this to you and worse. She reached across the island to clasp Olivia's hand in hers. "We were all so worried that something like this would happen which is why I kept saying that you didn't have to marry him. I still don't understand why you felt you had to stay with him, and plan a big wedding to help keep up the big front."
Silent tears began to flow. "I believed what I wanted to believe and now I'm forced to see the truth."
"Look Libby, we've had this conversation before and we're not going to revisit it. I understand you're devastated right now, but everything's going to be alright. Just keep believing that. Now as for Garrett Davis, Raquel Fletcher can have him."
Olivia nodded and laughed at her sister's words.
Now, go pack a bag…or two. You're going to stay with me and August for as long as you need. I don't want you staying here alone. Take some time away from your usual routine to get some perspective. Next week you might actually see that this was for the best."
Cecily stood and took Olivia's plate to sink, not giving her a chance to respond. Instead she got up and walked over to her big sister and hugged her tightly. Since they were little, Cecily had been her rock.
"I love you, Cissy."
Cecily hugged her back. "I love you too Libby." Now go and pack your bags so we can beat this popsicle stand."
Olivia laughed and walked out of the kitchen. She knew she'd grieve the end of this decades long relationship but as her sister said, everything would be alright.
Raquel Fletcher did have him…for about a year. They never married and were now co-parenting their five year old son, Edison Fletcher Davis. The little boy attended the same school as Elliott. Karma, Olivia mused.
Grabbing her French press and mug, Olivia went back to her office to continue reading the case file.
At eight o' clock that evening, a white Volvo SUV backed out of the driveway and drove away. Hayes and his wife Tamara had called and invited Olivia over for dinner. Since Elliott was away for the night, she didn't really have to cook and needing to get out of her too quiet home, she accepted their invitation.
Down the street, inconspicuously parked among other cars lining the street sat a black sedan. Inside, Fitz watched Olivia leave and wondered where she was going. From where he was sitting he couldn't see if their daughter was with her. He thought about following her, but he would bide his time. Tomorrow he would introduce himself to his daughter.
X
Olivia's phone rang before eight the next morning. She knew who it was before she reached over to answer it.
"Good morning, Sweet Pea."
"Good morning, Mommy."
"Did you wake Tante and Uncle Aug this early?" She knew her child.
"Uh huh. The sun was in my room and woke me up."
Olivia laughed. She owed her sister and brother-in-law, big time."
"Did you have a good time with Tante?"
"Yes. We saw Wiz Live. I danced with the lady, Mommy."
"Oh yeah. What lady?"
She could hear Elliott attempting to cover the phone as she asked Cecily a question.
"I danced on stage with Dorothy."
"You did? Did Tante take pictures?"
"I don't know. Um Mommy, Uncle Aug's gonna walk Turbo and I wanna go. Bye Mommy." And she was gone.
A few seconds later, Cecily came on the line.
"Hey Liv, were you sleeping?" She laughed at her joke.
"Hey Cissy, I see misery loves company. Did she wake you guys?"
"Patootie and Turbo have been up since seven. That dog loves my baby."
"She has as much energy as he does. Did she behave yesterday?"
"Of course. She was an angel."
"As if you would tell me if she didn't."
Cecily laughed. "True. I don't know why you even ask, little sister."
Olivia laughed too.
"Well I'm going down to start breakfast. I'll bring Elle Belle home by noon. Okay?"
"That's fine, I'll see you then."
"Bye, Liv."
"Bye, Cissy."
Olivia lay in bed for another thirty minutes before she rose to begin her day.
X
Later that morning, Olivia was headed downstairs to fix a cup of tea when the doorbell rang. Glancing at her watch, she saw that it was only ten o' clock. Cecily's early she thought. Twenty-four hours of non-stop little girl chatter gets old, quickly, she mused. Elliott could talk a person's ear off.
Walking to the door, she opened it. "You're ear…" Her words trailed off. Olivia felt the floor sway beneath her and her pulse pounded in her chest. It couldn't be. She wanted to scream, but she could only moan, "No." Her breath came in short pants as she leaned against the door frame. He wasn't in D.C., he couldn't be. She'd moved on from him, even though a part of her wanted him to come to her; not for herself, but for Elliott. She stepped out of the way as he pushed the door.
Olivia hadn't thought of trying to close it or lock it. It would've been futile to try and lock a door against Fitzgerald Thomas Grant III. She knew he would've just kicked it open. The cold, hard look in his eyes said it all. She jumped when he walked past her into the foyer.
"Fitz," she whispered. Gathering the strength she walked into the family room. With her back to him, she closed her eyes, willing her mind to go blank.