The order of the White Lotus had issued us all passports to travel into Ba-sing Sei, so we travelled to the hidden cove where the ferries carried refugees across every day, however before we got there, Lee had suggested that I change my appearance.
With some of the money that had been given to us, Mushi found me simple boy clothes to wear after I had taken a bath and once I was dressed, I tucked my hair under a hat which hid my eyes from view. "There. Now no one will bother you." Lee said to me, but I still didn't understand why I had to wear a boy's outfit. Seeing my confusion, Mushi chuckled at me.
"It is Lee's subtle way of taking precautions. If you are a girl, then other men may take an interest in bothering you, however if you look like a boy, then no one will. You see? He is just trying to protect you from all possibilities." Mushi assured me so I nodded my head, smiling in the shadow of my straw hat.
However when I saw the desolate place that was the refugee camp, I couldn't help but feel distressed at seeing so many hopeless faces. I touched a hand to my heart as I saw a small family grouped together, the mother holding her two little girls close. Where was their father?
"The Fire Nation did all this?" I questioned as I followed my two companions, still looking around me.
"Fire is difficult to control once it starts to spread." Mushi informed me as he head towards the ticket desk and joined the queue.
"Everyone looks so sad." I noted, biting my lip as a baby began to cry loudly, wanting something to eat but the elderly woman who held him had nothing to give. "And hungry." I stopped and looked down at a little girl who was tugging at the hem of my outer robe so I knelt down to look at her.
"Do you have anything to eat?" She asked me and I felt tears rise to my eyes but I reached back into the small pack I had been given and found an apple.
"Here. Take this." I said and she gave me a toothy smile before taking it out of my hand and biting into it quickly before I could change my mind. "Where is your mother?" Instantly her eyes saddened.
"Mama's gone away, the bad men came to my village and took away all the earthbenders. My big brother looks after us now." She told me before scampering away and I watched her go, feeling my heartstrings pull.
"Saki." Lee said, drawing my attention towards him and I stood up, seeing that the line had moved forwards. I walked with a bowed head onto the ferry, morbid thoughts wrapping around my mind.
"What troubles you child? You look as though you are in a very dark place." Mushi questioned me gently so I sighed, gripping onto the side of the ship as I watched the waves lap against its sides, as hungry as the people on board.
"I was just thinking, about the war. Maybe my family were killed by soldiers like many of these people." Taking a deep breath I shook my head. "I'm sorry, I know what you'd say. I should not worry about a past I cannot remember, but look to my future instead."
"No, that wasn't what I was going to say." Mushi said to me. "Memories are very important to everyone. They help shape people into who they are. Even if your family is no longer with you, I believe that there will be at least someone out there who still cares for you. Just look to your left, you'll see one now." I looked left and smiled at Mushi, who chuckled. "And also, if you look right, though he'd never admit it." I turned my head to look at Lee who glared out at the ocean, his fingers tightening their grip on the side.
"I couldn't care less." He answered grumpily but I only chuckled, knowing that it was part of Lee's nature to be prickly and defensive.
"Admit it, you adore me." I teased, poking his side but he shot me a dangerous look which I ignored. His uncle laughed as I poked him again and I got a twitch of a smile. "Come on, I know you're smiling." Giving a wide smile at Lee he rolled his eyes before moving away and I pulled back, wrapping my arms around my waist as Mushi placed his hand on my shoulder.
We were all given a bowl of…something…to eat. Quite honestly I preferred to go hungry. It smelled disgusting and didn't look much better. I prodded at the contents of my bowl and I swear it moved of its own accord. So I tipped it over the side with my tongue stuck out in disgust. "I'm sick of eating rotten food, sleeping in the dirt...I'm tired of living like this." Lee complained angrily and I rolled my eyes from behind Mushi, leaning against the rail with my injured leg propped up and resting against the side to take off the weight, arms folded across my chest as my staff leaned at my side.
"Aren't we all?" A voice questioned and I instantly tensed, feeling slightly on edge by it though I couldn't think why. It just naturally made me suspicious. "My name's Jet, and these are my freedom fighters, Smellerbee, and Longshot." A boy with messy black hair and tanned skin stepped forwards, chewing on a stem of some sort with two companions at his side.
"Hey." The little one waved and the archer nodded his head in greeting as Lee glanced at them then looked away.
"Hello."
"Here's the deal. I hear the Captain's eating like a king, while us refugees have to feed off his scraps. Doesn't seem fair, does it?" Jet reasoned while stepping closer to Lee and I tensed slightly as the suspicious boy got too close to Lee for my liking.
"What sort of king is he eating like?" Mushi questioned curiously, peering at Jet who wore a blank face.
"The fat, happy kind." He answered and instantly Mushi began to drool so I elbowed him, frowning as I went quiet and regarded this newcomer carefully. He was lithe and seemed the agile type, with various concealed weapons on his person and that dark look in his eye put me well off him. "So what do you say? You want to help us liberate some food?" Jet invited and Lee looked down to his gruel before throwing it over his shoulder and into the water.
"Count me in." He nodded his head so Jet smirked.
"Great. Here's the plan." I arched my eyebrow then turned my head away, my nails digging into the wooden rail before I gripped my staff and used it to move towards a group of elderly people, all shivering in the swiftly falling temperatures. Night was fast approaching, so I started to hand out blankets with Mushi's help.
Some kids had caught my attention and were all playing around me with laughter as I smiled and tickled them, however when Lee approached they all backed away. "Saki, stay with uncle. I'll be back soon. Don't talk to anyone." He ordered me then moved off but I caught his wrist, anchoring my staff to stand up whilst still holding onto him.
"Wait Lee…are you sure you want to do this?" I questioned, glancing over to where Jet and his two freedom fighters were waiting. "I know you're hungry and so is everyone else, but stealing is wrong. I'm sure if you just asked the captain he'd be happy to give us some of his food."
"Well you're wrong Sakiya." He answered forcefully, ripping his wrist out of my grip and I flinch, crestfallen at his harsh tone. "You can't let yourself think that all people are good, you can't trust everyone you meet. You need to learn to take what you need in order to survive, because it's the only way!" Lee glared me then began to walk off, however I quickly became angry. No way am I going to let him talk to me that way! So I slammed my staff down upon the deck, making a loud bang that stopped him in his tracks.
"You're wrong about me you know. I don't trust everyone." I informed him coldly as he turned to look at me at an angle, so I twirled my staff to line it against my arm and used it to point towards Jet who was distracted at the moment. "I don't trust him." Mushi glanced between us, seeing the argument as it began to boil between us, but I cut the fire from the cauldron by turning around and limping away slowly, my leg starting to hurt painfully so I made it over to Mushi then collapsed to the ground, dropping my staff and he quickly pulled me into his arms and patted my back.
"There now, you rest. You have done more than enough exercise for one day." He told me and I nodded my head before leaning against him and closed my eyes. The sky quickly became dark and the passengers all huddled together against the night. I was annoyed at Lee, but it quickly passed. He was just trying to help these people. I shouldn't have let my suspicions against Jet make me get so irritated.
It wasn't long before he returned and he helped hand out food, however when Jet held out a bowl of food to me, I used my staff to turn it away to give it to a hungry looking child, who gasped with a smile then quickly began to eat it, making Jet arch an eyebrow at me curiously and I lifted my head slightly.
I didn't let him see my face as I didn't want him to try and intimidate me, so I simply sat with a straight back and my leg resting outwards, wrapped up tightly in bandages. "What happened to your leg?" He asked and I waited a moment before answering.
"A building fell on me." I replied sardonically and he arched his eyebrow again curiously.
"Really? Ouch. I thought you might be a girl. You don't walk like a man." He said, moving forwards to take the seat beside me but I quickly snapped my staff to hit the empty space, stopping him in his tracks as I blocked his path.
"Reserved." I grit my teeth, clenching my fingers tightly and Jet laughed, holding up his hands in mock defeat.
"Okay, okay, I know when I'm not wanted." He said, backing away just as Lee appeared. Glancing at Jet he quickly narrowed his eyes, tensing his shoulders but then Mushi let out a huge belch, effectively diffusing all tension as Lee pinched his nose shut and made a sound of disgust.
"Uncle!" I only smirked from under my hat, biting back my laugh at Mushi's coarse manners.
"Aahh…that hit the spot. Any more?" He asked hopefully but there was none spare. Both Smellerbee and Longshot sat with us, making conversation awkward and rather non-existent until Mushi decided to try and perk things up again. "So, Smellerbee, that's an unusual name for a young man." He said but the kid only gave a sharp glare.
"Maybe it's because I'm not a man. I'm a girl!" She revealed, rising and storming off where Longshot quickly followed after her.
"Oh, now I see! It's a beautiful name for a lovely girl!" Mushi called after her and I chuckled, shaking my head.
"Next time, how about you stick to commenting on the weather?" I suggested and he chuckled as well, giving a deep bellied laugh before yawning with a stretch.
"Well. Tomorrow is a big day. I suggest we all get some rest. You too, nephew. Even a man needs his sleep. Especially old, fat men like me." Mushi laughed again as he lay down and promptly started to snore, making Lee roll his eyes.
With an affectionate smile I took off my blanket and tossed it over Mushi, tucking it around him securely to keep him warm then got up, taking my staff with me to limp over to the side of the ship where I could see the stars clearly and I turned my head to gaze up at them. They seemed to comfort me, so I started to make shapes out of them all, making a wish if I saw a shooting star and tonight there seemed to be many, though I only made one wish. I wished for my memories.
"Saki." Lee's voice came from behind me softly and instantly I turned my head away, signalling I wasn't ready to talk but he didn't seem to pick up on my hint as he approached me all the same. "You'll get cold." He said before I felt something be wrapped around my shoulders, already warm from where it had been Lee's blanket so I turned around.
"What about you?" I questioned with concern. If he didn't have a blanket then he might catch a cold.
"I'll be fine." He assured me then turned his head away, looking slightly ashamed. "I'm sorry I snapped at you earlier. It was uncalled for." He said and I blinked in surprise before smiling, relaxing my shoulders.
"It's okay. I'm used to you being a jerk." I said with a teasing tone before punching his shoulder. "Just try not to walk all over me. I may be a cripple now, but once I have both feet working again, I'm gonna kick your butt." Giving him a smirk I took my staff and made to move back towards Mushi, however my leg buckled underneath me and I went straight for the ground.
"Watch out!" Lee quickly moved to grab me, holding me upright. "Your leg?" He questioned and I nodded my head, biting my lip as I pressed my eyes shut to block the tears of pain. "Here, I'll carry you."
"No it's okay, I can manage." I started pleadingly but Lee didn't give me a choice. He lifted me all too easily off the ground and I instantly had to cling onto him for balance as he walked away from the side of the ship and carried me over to where Mushi was sleeping, still snoring deeply but Lee gave him a kick and his uncle snorted before quietening down, making me giggle before turning to look at Lee, his handsome features accented by the moonlight with deep amber gold eyes looking back down at me.
He shifted awkwardly, unsure of what to do or say and I blushed, still holding onto him. "Goodnight." He said finally, putting me quickly down then walked away with a firm stride, making me blink after him before looking down in disappointment.
I lay down and pulled the blanket close around me, curling up but did not sleep for a long time, looking out towards the sky where the stars and moon continued to gleam.