I watched over my brother as he slept, shaking and hissing quietly as he dreamed bad dreams, and I was instantly reminded of how Zuko had been the same during his fever. So much made sense now that never did before. The secret exchanges of glances, the information that was always kept hidden from me, things I wasn't allowed to see or hear about…it was all to try and put off my memories returning. Exhaling wearily I began to hum a song to my brother, stroking his head as the stubble of hair began to grow from lack of shaving. It had the same effect it always had, calming him into a better sleep as I lay next to him in the captain's quarters of a fire navy ship that we'd captured.
We'd joined up with Sokka and Katara's father, Hakoda, and all his men at Chameleon Bay. The day of Black Sun was coming and they were all preparing an invasion plan to take down the Fire Lord. At the discussions for the war, I had made one thing perfectly plain. Azula and Zuko were mine. They were going to answer for all their transgression against my brother and me.
Aang gave a small moan of pain so I reached out and kissed his head, trying to comfort him. "It's alright Aang. I'm home now, I'm home with you and everything will be alright." I promised him gently. "I'm an airbender now, and I'll help you bring peace to the souls of our people and restore balance to the world. There's too much fire, too much anger, hate and destruction." I whispered as I heard the door creak open where Toph, Katara and Sokka poked their heads around to look in on us and listen to me as I lamented. "To bring balance, my sweet little brother, you must be the change that you want to see in the world. Where there is fire and destruction, replace it with life. Where you find anger, replace it with peace, and if you find hate, show love." A tear rolled down my cheek but I pressed my eyes shut to stop the rest from following. "And I'll be there to see you grow into the greatest Avatar this world has ever seen."
"The monk's right Aang." Sokka announced and I shot him a glare as he approached the bed where Aang rested. "You'll be pretty awesome. Just remember all the amazing, crazy cool stuff you've already done." He said then began to count them off his fingers. "You've helped loads of people in the earth kingdoms, you saved the northern water tribe, you ended a hundred year long feud between two of the weirdest groups of people I have ever met." He said as Toph lifted her head.
"Yeah twinkle toes. You stood up to me too, remember? That takes some guts, plus you managed to get over your earthbending block, though we've still got some training to do so don't think you're getting out of it that easy." She said as Katara sat on Aang's other side, resting her hand on his head.
"We're all here for you Aang. Just hold on." She said and I gave her a grateful smile. However when I saw Sokka had a strained face, I sighed and rolled my eyes.
"Go on Sokka, I know you're dying to ask me something." I said and instantly he let out the breath he'd been holding with relief.
"Okay so what I don't get is how come you can airbend now. Did you like, die then regenerate or something? Because that would be cool." He said then folded his arms, pursing his lips to squint at me interrogatively.
"I don't know." I admitted, sitting up with a shrug. "I think maybe I always had it in me, but until now it was just locked away inside of me. It was only when I lost my memories and became someone completely different my airbending really came through, like you saw." I said and Katara thought for a moment, however it was Toph who realised the connection.
"Of course! That's it!" She said, lifting her head. "Before you were a serious, kind of grouchy, down to earth kind of person, and that's the key. Down to earth. Whereas on the other hand, Aang is an airhead who always has his head in the clouds. The difference couldn't be greater, but when you got zapped by that lightning freak, your personality changed. I bet you were a more go with the flow kind of person, letting yourself have fun and weren't always so dull." I blinked at her.
"Hey! I was never dull, was I?" I questioned and the others all looked around, avoiding the question so I chuckled. "I guess maybe you're right. I was my own enemy back then, but now…well I guess everyone changes." But as I said those words, I instantly felt a stabbing pain in my chest and I touched it gingerly, the place where Azula had struck me with the lightning, and where I felt Zuko's betrayal the most.
"She missed your heart, you know, but only by a little." Katara said to me. "When I was healing the area you'd been hit, I felt all the energy locked inside. If it had hit your heart then there's no doubt that you would have died." She informed me and I sighed.
"I almost wish I could be struck by lightning again. It's got to better than…this." I said, gesturing to Aang. "Just sitting here, waiting and praying that he'll pull through. It's the worst thing ever." Toph punched me affectionately on the shoulder, attempting to cheer me up but I made no response.
"Sorry. That's all I got." She said so Katara reached out and rested her hand over mine.
"It's not just Aang, is it?" Her eyes met mine with understanding so I sighed and shook my head.
"No. It's not." Sokka scratched his head in confusion.
"What else is there? Did you get hurt or something? A splinter? I hate those, the way they're just under the skin but you can't quite get at them and they really sting…" We all just glared at him so he pointed to the door. "I'll just…go." He said and slipped away, leaving us girls alone.
"It's about Zuko, right?" Katara asked and I nodded my head.
"Uh, hello? Blind girl here. I can't tell if you're nodding or shaking your head." Toph said before blinking. "In fact, don't bother. I'm no good at this mushy girl talk stuff. I'll follow Sokka and trap him halfway through the floor or something." She said, leaving us alone too and I watched as the door slammed shut behind her.
"So, you really fell for him, didn't you?" Katara asked and I grit my teeth.
"I'm not proud of it." I told her and she quickly lifted her hands.
"No, no, I'm not saying it's a bad thing. Well…it kind of is, but you know, they say all love is a good thing, no matter who it is." She tried to amend but I shook my head, telling her it was alright.
"I'm sorry, it's just a little hard at the moment, trying to find the point between the two people I was that makes the person I am now." I explained and Katara nodded her head in understanding.
"That's okay, we all get it. Two people in one mind is frustrating, but I know you'll figure out who you are. Out of us all, you were always the one who knew exactly where they stood without question. You were like our big sister and it was only after you were gone we realised how much we needed you. How much Aang needed you. You should have seen him, Thyra, he was completely out of balance within himself for weeks after. Losing Appa didn't help, but I think he eventually managed to deal with the grief."
"As much as I hate to say it, Aang needed time away from me." Smiling lovingly down at my brother I returned to stroking his head gently. "He needed to find out how strong he was without me, how to handle things on his own. I wish I could tell him how proud I am."
"You will, when he wakes up." Katara answered confidently. "Which will be very soon. Come on, you should rest as well and eat something. You can't lock yourself away in here and waste away, it's not healthy for you." She gripped my hand and I let her lead me away, however I pulled back a moment to kiss Aang's face before finally turning and letting him rest.