AN: *Pokes head out of the depths of grad school: Erm here's this.

I can't deal with my emotions from "A Single Pale Rose" and so I'm channeling it toward fics.

"Is there any chance we're going to survive this?" Amethyst asked staring up at the hand shaped space ship descending toward the place that had been her home for centuries now. All the humans had been evacuated from Beach City already and, even though humans tended to stay away from this area of the beach, it still felt empty. Probably because of the absence of the boy they'd watch grow up on that beach.

"Unfortunately, yes," Garnet replied. Her mouth became a thin line as her fingers curled around the two gems that made her up. Pearl glanced at Garnet and then folded her arms over her chest and looked away from them to somewhere down the beach. Her body was eerily still. Nervous Pearl was usually a moving, pacing, jittery mess, but this Pearl was as still as a statue. Amethyst often forgot that under the overprotective, bossy, cookie-baking, parenting-book-reading Pearl, there was this hardened solider Pearl in front of her now. That's what finally did it for Amethyst. Sure, she'd known intellectually that the gems coming were bad news and that everyone was in danger, but a part of her hadn't really realized it until now.

She felt suddenly alone on that beach despite the company of the two people she'd spent so much of her life with. Garnet looked over at her and then at Pearl. "It'll be best if you two form Opal," she said. Amethyst looked back up at the sky. What use would Opal be against that? She thought. She didn't voice her doubts though, instead choosing to return Pearl's nod when she looked over.

Amethyst was instantly awake. That sick feeling of helpless loneliness still lingered in her gut despite the years and distance between the events in her dream and now. Sleeping was a no then.

Amethyst sat up, curling her arms around herself. Opal hadn't been any use in that fight. In retrospect, she wondered if Garnet had known that. The suggestion had probably been less about giving them a fighting chance and more about giving her teammates some tangible form of comfort in the last moments before… She shook the memories away. Drowning herself in those feelings wasn't going to help her.

She was so tired though.

She'd been forcing those feeling back for so long now just so she could muscle through life without curling up into a little, catatonic ball. Now was the first time in years that she had the option of succumbing to all of it without having to worry about being literally stabbed in the back while she was distracted. It was so tempting to just give in for a little bit. Maybe she could even poof herself and take time reforming…

"Don't you dare, Amethyst," she whispered to herself. She dug her fingernails into her arm, trying to focus on the physical pain. "You've got a reason to look forward to the sunrise for once. Now is not the time."

Needing to move, she got to her feet and batted open the flaps of the small tent Steven had set up for her before going to bed. As they'd walked toward Connie's and Steven's tent after their conversation the night before, Connie had pulled Steven aside to whisper something in his ear. Steven had then offered to let her sleep in their tent with them. It had been a terribly tempting offer as every one of her instincts were screaming at her to not let that child out of her sight, but it also felt a bit intrusive. It had been incredibly thoughtful of Connie to suggest it, though, and they'd insisted on setting up a tent for her a few yards away from their own.

Her eyes lingered on the larger tent before she turned away to trudge toward the opposite side of the camp. Even with most of the people in the camp asleep, there were still soft sounds of life around her: sleepy murmurs inside tents and blankets rustling. A couple of the humans were standing guard on the outskirts of the area, talking quietly to one another. She waved so they wouldn't think she was a threat trying to sneak up on them. They acknowledged her presence but didn't try to speak with her.

She half wished they had struck up a conversation, though she didn't particularly want to talk to strangers. At least it would give her something else to think about.

When she made it to the edge of the campsite, her eyes were drawn to something familiar: a van with Steven's last name printed in colorful letters on the side. It was sitting with its lights on, the engine humming softly. Amethyst walked around the side of it to see that the back was open. Greg sat on the edge fiddling with something.

"This old thing still works?" Amethyst asked. He startled a bit.

"Oh, hey Amethyst," he said, setting the object in his hands down. He glanced at the inside of his van. "Uh, yeah. We have some people working with us that are pretty good with technology stuff. There aren't really any places you can get gas for it anymore so they had to rig it so it works off some gem artifact we found a couple years back."

Amethyst looked the van over with a critical eye. "No offence Greg, but, why?"

He smiled a bit. "Here, let me show you." He disappeared into the back of the van and, after a moment, Amethyst crawled in after him.

While the outside of the van had looked exactly the same as it had before, the inside didn't look at all familiar. First of all, it was clean. (Well, cleaner. There were a couple of blankets and pillows thrown into a corner indicating he still slept in the thing. There were some old food containers laying around, but Amethyst could tell by their scent that they hadn't been around for more than a few days.) Secondly, there was a hodgepodge of human and gem technology laid out together right behind the driver's seat.

"What's all this?" she asked.

"Remember how I was able to decode the message on the Wailing Stone with some of my equipment?" he asked.

She did. It hadn't done them much good in the long run, but they'd been able to get a bit prepared. Garnet had enough time to map out the best path with her future vision. They'd been able to discuss what was happening with Greg when Steven had gone to bed. They'd been able to pack Steven's bags with care instead of just throwing things into bags when they saw the hand-ship in the sky one day. "Yeah," she replied.

"Well, we can't figure out all of the gem technology with what we have here, but we've been able to understand some things and intercept some of the messages going out from the Homeworld forces. I was able to use some of the music tech I had in here at the beginning and its gone from there. I've been getting a lot better and, with all the human scientist that we've teamed up with over the years, we've been doing pretty okay for ourselves." He sounded a bit proud of that.

"That's pretty cool, Greg," she said.

"Yeah, well," he said running his fingers through (what little was left of) his hair. "We're still quite a bit behind. Like, I've been trying to figure this out for months now," he said, picking up the thing he'd been fiddling with before she'd arrived to show her.

She glanced at it. "Here, give it to me," she requested, holding out her hand. He looked at her for a moment before handing it over. She pushed a few buttons to activate it. The device made a few quiet sounds and she twisted the top a few times to tune it before turning a dial. The voices became clear even if they weren't saying anything important at the moment. He accepted the device back with an unreadable expression that had her turning away a bit and trying to hide behind her hair. "We used them sometimes," she explained. She didn't see his reaction to that fact as she wasn't looking at him anymore. The van suddenly seemed more cramped than it had moments before.

"Amethyst," he started. "I have to ask…"

"If you're going to ask where my loyalty lies," Amethyst interrupted, "it's still with Steven."

There was a pause. "I wasn't going to ask that," he told her, his voice kind.

"Really?" she asked, chuckling darkly, "cause that's the first question I would've asked."

There was a rustling sound as he moved closer and she could feel his hand hovering near her shoulder, but he didn't touch her. "Amethyst, I know you. I watched the way you and the other Crystal Gems were around Steven while he grew up. Where your loyalty lies was never in question. You three would do anything for him." She glanced at him and then looked away again.

"Yeah," she agreed, hugging her knees to her chest. He crawled toward her and sat next to her, leaving just a couple of centimeters between them. She closed the gap, letting her shoulder rest against his arm.

"What did they do to you Amethyst?" he asked.

"Well, they didn't shatter me," she said bitterly.

"Amethyst."

She sighed. "You know, the only other quartz I'd ever met until Homeworld came back was Rose," she told him quietly. She clenched her fists, "but most quartzes aren't like Rose," she said with a strangled laugh. "They suck. And," she swallowed, "and the worst part is that I see some of what they are in me. They're messy and loud. They never think about the consequences of their actions. They," she hesitated, looking over at him, "they're intentionally cruel."

Greg sighed. He knew exactly what she was talking about. "First of all, Amethyst," he started, "being messy and brash does not mean you're evil. I mean, didn't you ever see my van before? The only reason it's clean now is because Connie helps me clean it out at least once a week." She snorted a bit despite herself. "And while sometimes you probably should have thought before you did things, sometimes being unpredictable is a good thing. You were a good balance to Pearl and Garnet in a fight from what I understand. And secondly, I'm not going to lie and say you never purposefully did things that you knew would hurt others, but you never did it for fun. It was because you were lashing out in grief or because you felt attacked. It wasn't nice of you, but it doesn't make you evil. It just makes you a person. And you made up for it."

"I cleaned your garage after turning into your dead lover in front of your kid," she said blankly, "and that was only the second time. The first time, I just barley spoke to you for over a decade unless it involved Steven."

"Well, I didn't say you were good at making up for it."

She picked at a hole in her pants. "Yeah," she agreed. They sat in silence for a moment. She could feel his sides moving softly with his breath and despite everything she relaxed a little bit. The rhythmic feeling of a human's movements while breathing had become a comfort over the years ever since- It breaths even when it isn't awake which seems odd to Amethyst. Sure, Amethyst breaths most of the time to be able to talk and stuff, but it was a conscious thing and she often doesn't bother when she doesn't need air for anything. But apparently, human babies need to breath constantly even when they aren't doing anything but laying there with their eyes closed. Garnet had made sure to give her that lecture very firmly and Amethyst wonders what future she'd seen where Amethyst screws up.

The thing laying on top of her makes a noise and shifts a bit. Drool pools on her shirt, but even if Amethyst cared, she would not be moving. The small human had just been screaming not 15 minutes ago, louder than any corrupted gem. At least now it isn't screaming. She hopes Greg or Garnet come back soon and that Pearl doesn't. It makes another soft whine. Is it supposed to do that? Amethyst hopes she hasn't broken it.

Oh god, what if it's finally quiet because she broke it.

Except, no, she still feels its chest move as its lungs expand and contract. As long as that is happening, it's probably alive. Just to make sure she gently pokes it in the face. Soft skin dimples under her light touch, but springs back when she pulls her finger away. It makes a complaining noise when it's forced awake, its eyes opening to stare at her. It is the most person like thing she's ever seen it do yet and she cracks a smile. 'Sorry,' she apologizes in a whisper. 'Just wanted to make sure you're okay.' It seems to accept her apology, snuffling a bit and closing its eyes again before going still. Well, still except the rhythmic movement of its chest. Okay. So. Maybe she can see why Garnet and Greg like holding him. Maybe.- "Thanks, Greg," she said, bumping her shoulder into him gently. He smiled a bit at her and she bit her lip. "And also," she continued, "thanks for taking care of Steven all these years."

"He's my son," Greg pointed out.

"Yeah, I know," Amethyst said, "But thanks anyway." He nodded. "He's so grown up now. He's still him, but different too: stronger, smarter. You did a good job, although you always were the only one who was any good with the raising him junk."

Greg laughed. "Not really. I never knew what I was doing. The day my three-month-old magically ended up on the carwash roof, I knew I never had a chance. I've been faking it ever since. We were all in the same boat with that kid."

"Yeah, but you knew what to feed him and how not to almost drown him in the bath," she pointed out.

"True," he conceded.

She grinned, but then sobered, looking away. "I'm still messing up," she confessed.

"What do you mean?"

"I told him what happened to the others. I shouldn't have, but I couldn't lie to him when he asked."

Greg paused. "I… well, Steven is an adult now. he deserves to know how they…"

"No Greg," she winced at how sharp her tone was and took a breath before continuing. "They're alive. Or at least Pearl is, and I think Garnet might be. And I told Steven." She yanked at her hair.

"Oh." Greg replied. "He'll want to…"

"Of course, he will. He's Steven," she rubbed the bridge of her nose. "Pearl would kill me if she knew I told him."

Greg thought for a moment. "I don't like it," he admitted. "He's going to put himself in the direct line of fire over this, so, of course I don't like it. I'm his dad. But, like I said, he is an adult now. He's no longer the 13-year-old kid he once was. A lot of things have happened to that little boy to make him the person he is today. He's protected the Earth and helped raise an army of humans to defend themselves. Not to say I don't worry about him and that the concept of him going directly after Homeworld like he is probably going to do terrifies me to no end. But, there is nothing either of us can do about it now. They're still his family."

"I know." And a part of her wanted to do it too. Fight against Homeworld directly to get back Pearl and Garnet. She could barely even imagine what it would be like to have all of them back together again, but her heart still ached at the idea of it.

"Promise me you'll go with him though," Greg said seriously.

"I'm not going to send our kid off on a dangerous mission without adult supervision Gregory. What type of responsible adult do you think I am?" Despite the gravity of the situation, Greg accepted the shift of mood, rolling his eyes.

"The type that feeds a three-year-old a pint of cookie dough ice cream for breakfast."

"How was I supposed to know what would happen?"

"You knew," he accused.

She shrugged. "Maybe, but I wasn't watching him that day." Greg scoffed, Amethyst chuckled, and things were all right for at least a few moments.

Amethyst sat outside her tent, her legs crisscrossed, staring at Steven and Connie's tent impatiently. The sun had already risen (what felt like) hours ago, and most of the adult humans had already started their days. Amethyst could smell food being cooked a few tents away and people were shambling from place to place in the way humans usually do when they first wake up.

She bit her lip and sighed, picking at the grass next to her. 'Steven and Connie need sleep,' she told herself, 'you have to leave them alone.' She unfolded her legs and flopped onto her back, closing her eyes against the glare of the rising sun. She was given a few seconds of warning by virtue of the soft sound of pattering feet racing toward her.

"Hi!" the small child from the day before enthused when he sloppily landed beside her, his boney elbow jamming into her side in a way that would have stolen the breath of a human.

She opened one eye to peer lazily at the boy. "Sup, Steven Junior?" He giggled when she called him that and she felt a smile pull at her lips in spite of the chill façade she was trying for.

"You want breakfast?"-It's together breakfast! he exclaims. The stack on his plate looks like something humans probably shouldn't eat. Honestly, she's doing him a favor taking it off his hands. He doesn't seem to agree and takes off running through her room. She could catch up with him in an instant, but it's more fun to give chase.- Larry blinked down at her.

She swallowed. "I'm not really hungry, but thanks," she told him.

"Really?" he asked, "my dad's a good cook!"

"Nah, squirt, save it for the people who need to eat." He looked confused for a moment, probably not aware gems didn't need food to survive. She reached up and ruffled his hair and he easily forgot his confusion. "Why don't you go help your dad with breakfast.

He smiled, "Okay!" he said, complying without question. He popped to his feet and was gone in a flash, leaving only a cloud of dust that blew into her face.

She gritted her teeth and hit herself in the forehead when he was gone. "Don't do this. Keep it together," she mumbled to herself. Little inconsequential things like that should not send her mood plummeting. After a few moments, she pushed herself up onto her feet. She glanced at the tent in front of her. They'd had enough sleep, she decided. She plastered a smile onto her face and marched toward the tent.

"Steven! Connie!" she called, springing into their tent before stopping fast, "…Stevonnie."

The fusion woke with a start, bolting into a sitting position with their blanket held to their chest with clenched fingers. "Amethyst?!"

"You fuse when you sleep?" she asked. They hadn't unfused immediately, Amethyst noted, even with the shock. Impressive. They must be a pretty stable fusion

A blush rose on their cheeks. "Um… yeah…sleep," they coughed.

Amethyst tilted her head at them. "Wait, do you not have a shirt on?" she asked noting the way the fusion was still clinging to the blanket and the bare shoulders just barely visible. "Oh."

"Get out," they said.

"Wait, wait," she said, "how does that work, do you just…?"

"Out!" they yelped, reaching blindly for whatever was next to them and throwing it at her violently.

She caught the object (Steven's shoe) and laughed, rolling out of the tent to avoid the next projectile. She laid flat on her back for a moment guffawing as one voice turned into two and there was a desperate shuffling inside the tent.

Amethyst sat up and waited for a few minutes. Finally, Steven and Connie walked out of the tent. Connie glanced at Amethyst, blushed, and walked off in the other direction. Steven, wordlessly, held out a hand for his shoe.

Amethyst contemplated him for a moment. "Greg did give you 'The Talk' didn't he?" she inquired, plopping the shoe into his hand. "Because I already helped raise one human. I'm not ready for another baby. I need a couple of centuries."

"I am not having this discussion with you," he replied, struggling to put on his shoe.

"Why not?"

"No offence, Amethyst, but you're a sexless rock that came out of the ground fully formed. You don't know anything about it. Also, it was awkward enough with dad and Pearl when I was eight."

"Oi, your mom was a sexless rock too you know. Besides, I know plenty," she protested. "Do you know how many books on puberty Pearl tried to make us read and then read out loud to the rest of us when we wouldn't?" she asked. "So. Many."

"Please don't make me have this conversation again. Really. Dad covered all the bases. Please."

"Whatever dude," she relented. "Just don't let her get you pregnant." Steven paused and looked like he was going to say something before shaking his head.

"Yeah, okay, I promise I won't get pregnant. Can we drop it now Amethyst?"

"Sure," she agreed, satisfied with his promise, "what's the plan for today?"

"Well," he said, his eyes lighting up, "first, we should have breakfast and then you can meet Centi and the others and then you can help Connie and I train!" He grabbed her arm and pulled her toward a seating area a little ways away where Connie was already putting together a couple of plates of food and idly talking with a couple of the other humans.

Connie turned when Amethyst and Steven walked up and smiled at them, apparently over her embarrassment from earlier. She handed a plate to Steven. "Do you want anything?" she asked Amethyst.

"Nah, I'm good," she said. Her stomach still twisting at the thought of 'together breakfast' and the lack of the 'together.'

"You sure?" she asked. "We have plenty, really."

She shrugged, glancing at the plate in Steven's hand. "Eh. It looks like goop anyway," she waved her off.

"Amethyst, I've seen you consume literal garbage," Steven commented bewildered.

"Yeah, well, I got out of the habit of eating," she snapped, immediately regretting her tone. She tried to soften into nonchalant. "That can from last night gave me indigestion."

The damage had apparently already been done, judging by Steven's expression. "But…" he trailed off. "Okay," he said after a moment. They sat down on some chairs, an awkward silence between them while the two humans began to eat. Steven kept giving her those part pouting, mostly concerned puppy dog eyes he was so good at but didn't press. That almost made it worse. Why hadn't she just eaten the darn food.

Connie shifted and cleared her throat a bit. "So, do you want to ask any more questions about our operation?" she asked. "We didn't really explain much yesterday."

Amethyst didn't really have any questions, but she wasn't about to throw away the conversation life-line Connie had just thrown her. She thought for a moment. "I noticed Donut Girl, erm, Sadie, stayed with you guys all these years," she commented.

"Yeah, a lot of the Beach City people stuck around with us. They kinda knew more about what was happening with the world than most humans because they'd lived with you guys all those years," Connie told her.

"I guess running into gem monsters on the beach every so often would prepare you for a lot," Amethyst said.

"Yep, we're pretty spread out at the moment, but it's nice to at least know where some people from before all this happened are, you know," Connie said.

Amethyst swallowed thickly and twisted her fingers up in her pants a bit. "I do." Back to silence. Amethyst opened her mouth and then closed it.

"Do you want to see Vidalia?" Steven blurted. Both Amethyst and Connie looked at him in surprise. "It's just, she used to talk about how you were friends sometimes after…" he trailed off, looking down at his plate. Amethyst forcibly shoved the thought of a thirteen-year-old Steven being comforted with stories about Amethyst and Vidalia in the old days from her head.

"So, she's okay then?"

Connie was watching Steven with drawn eyebrows, but still answered her. "Yeah, her and her family should have landed on the Pacific Coast by now," Connie explained when it was clear Steven wasn't going to reply. "Would… would you want to go see her?"

"I-I don't know, I…" That offer brought up a lot of complicated emotions. She hadn't even seen Vidalia since Steven was little. Would she even want to see Amethyst? Her race was currently trying to destroy the Earth after all. Of course, she wanted to see her, but it was more complicated than that. It was… "Yes," spilled out of her mouth without permission.

"Okay, we can go there first today," Connie said. She turned to Steven. "Why don't you go radio them and tell them we're coming?" His eyes flickered up to her.

"Yeah, sure," he replied getting up. He took Connie's plate from her and walked away.

Amethyst sighed.

"Hey," Connie said softly, reaching a hand over to cover Amethyst's.

"I didn't mean to…"

"I know," Connie replied. "So does Steven. He just doesn't know how to deal with this yet." She hesitated. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"There's not really and 'it,'" Amethyst explained. "I don't know why I got so stressed out about breakfast. There's just a lot of things bumping up around in my head that I can't really pin down. I'm not sure where some of these thoughts are coming from honestly… It's silly."

"It's not silly," Connie reassured her, squeezing her hand a bit. "You don't have to completely understand what's going on in your head right now. Give yourself a bit of time."

She gave the girl a half smile. "Thanks," she mumbled.

"I, uh, called Jenny and said we're coming." They both looked up at Steven's voice. Neither had noticed him approach. "She'll let Vidalia know."

"Alright then, let's go," Connie said getting up. Amethyst hesitated, playing with her fingers.

"Come on Amethyst," Steven said. "I promise she'll be happy to see you." He leaned over to curl his fingers over hers. She looked up at him. His eyes were gentle and calm. Apparently, she'd been forgiven for her earlier curtness already. She turned her hand over and linked their fingers. He tugged at her arm, no harder than he had when he was a toddler, though by now he probably could have picked her up and carried her away if he'd decided. She let him pull her up anyway. He let her hold his hand until they had to let go to mount his lion.

AN: This will eventually get done. Eventually.

Sorry for the typically spelling errors.