Us. If one word could invoke such hesitation it was that word. Us meant reality. Kakashi was a planner. He thought out his moves and actions diligently, considering every possibility to every option before actually acting, but this was not the time for hesitation.

But, his face uncharacteristically fell, and her eyes caught it. The slight widening of his eyes that Shizune mistook as hesitation when it was really just shock at her forwardness. He already thought he'd made his intentions clear with his actions. He made sure the house was clean, so she didn't have to be on her feet after working all day, and that her favourite blanket was always washed since she liked curling up in it on weekends. He'd hidden of all her jasmine and plum scented perfumes because he knew they triggered her nausea even though she'd loved them before and made sure to always have taro ice cream in the freezer for her.

Shizune looked away, disappointment suffocating her heart as she squinted at the white hot tears burning her eyes. She quickly rushed out of the apartment, not wanting to be the hysterical one in the interaction. Shizune wasn't hysterical. She was logical and measured, and it didn't end well when she let her feelings take over. But the calmness of his interactions always unnerved and infuriated her. It was as if he didn't feel. It was a great asset for someone of his position, but it never shut off.

"Shinobi aren't supposed to feel," her mental voice reminded her. To which she forcefully thought, "Bullshit, I feel. Everyone does."

"Does he know how difficult it is to feel so alone? Does he have any idea what it's like to have no one to talk to in the middle of the night?" All she wanted from him was to be there for her like her friends were. To be the hand she held on this journey that they found themselves taking. Why couldn't they do it together?

But, why bother saying it. He was always alone, so obviously he knew; he seemed to prefer it. Should she even be blaming him for hesitating at the thought of commitment when it was never the future he pictured for himself. She was the one who optimistically sought a life of companionship and love, even when the only companion she had was Tsunade. She dreamed of happily-ever-after, not whatever this was. Her prince charming wasn't supposed to be an errant, porn-reading fool. Who still reads porn anyway?!

Kakashi, meanwhile, was getting stir-crazy waiting for Shizune to come back from wherever she'd gone. He met up with Yamato at a local bar to talk through this situation being that the wood-release practitioner was one of his closest friends. Unfortunately, Yamato had less experience with serious relationships than Kakashi, so it was more of an opportunity for Kakashi to gripe than gain insight. He'd began helping in subtle ways ages ago, and he couldn't understand why she was so upset with him. He wasn't expecting the question to be about them, so he didn't answer right away, but it should be apparent to her already.

"Why can't she see that I'm making the effort already? I'm on time to her appointments. I go home every evening!"

"I'm honestly surprised that you let yourself fall into this situation," Yamato began to say, "I think-"

"She wants you to want to be there," Iruka cautiously interrupted, "It's not enough just to show up, you have to mean it."

It seemed the Chunnin was grabbing a drink there as well, and despite the awkward timing and the slight annoyance that Kakashi felt at being comparatively out of the loop again, he would take all the help he could get.

"I wouldn't be making the effort if I didn't want to make a go of this," Kakashi said while shaking his head, "I even rented out my flat to another person. Of course I mean it!"

"Have you tried telling her this?" Iruka asked in turn, "Does she realize that you're not around because you feel obligated to be there? That you aren't doing it out some misguided sense of duty? Because...from our talks, I don't think she does."

"Our talks," Kakashi repeated as he lazily looked over at the tanned teacher, "Talks, huh?"

"Hey now!" Iruka exclaimed taking a step back, "Don't shoot the messenger! I'm sure she'd like to talk with you over me. I'm just trying to be a good friend."

Sending him a side-eyed glare, Kakashi ordered another round for the table. Yamato glanced up at Iruka, motioning for him to sit as it seemed the Copy Ninja wanted to have a few words with Shizune's friend. Iruka sighed as he knew this would derail his plans for the evening.

"Tell me more about these talks."

Kakashi came home to find Shizune seething, angrily setting up the nursery and decidedly avoiding his gaze. She was very roughly putting together a mobile with little ninjas and stars, while he gently went over and sat next to her.

"Iruka will be his godfather, and Yamato should be the guardian," Kakashi suddenly declared, jarring Shizune out of her rage-trance, "Iruka is good with kids, and Yamato is reliable. Tsunade can be his godmother, but I get to decide these things as well. I should be included in these decisions. He's my kid, too."

So, it seems he did have an opinion and wanted to have an input. Shizune was heartened that he was at the least taking an interest in their child's future, but she stubbornly kept putting fluffy stars on hooks instead of looking up at him. It was the first time he'd acknowledged being a dad and being involved, and she was having a hard time keeping a straight face. This damned kid was turning her into a crier, so she hurriedly looked down, blinking frantically to curb the stinging in her eyes.

"I saw you were out of daifuku…" he continued carefully, "I brought some more since you like those after appointments…"

She looked up him in slight surprise. She'd been too preoccupied with her own thoughts and emotions to realize that he'd noticed any of her mannerisms. If he was paying such close attention to little things like that, she began to wonder what other things he'd been doing. As she thought back, Shizune could have kicked herself for being so unobservant. She hadn't done dishes in a month, and she'd seen him doing laundry on more than one occasion.

"A Hokage doing my laundry," she chided herself, "That's not how assistants work… He's busy enough as it is!"

"I've been such a fool," she said slowly, pouting a little in his direction, "Thank you…for doing everything I haven't noticed."

Kakashi nodded in response and smiled his signature, behind-the-mask smile at her, happy that her anger had seemingly dissipated.

"Does this answer your question from earlier?" he asked leadingly.

"No, not at all," Shizune said, wanting a firm answer with no assumptions, though she hoped her assumption was true.

"We're already an 'us'," he answered with a deep sigh, finally saying it out loud.