A/N: There is no time lapse between chapters. I included the last several lines of Chapter 25 for continuity.

Remember the italics are for emphasis in dialogue, names of publications, words related to magic, foreign language and/or inner thoughts.

Please review! PM me if you see any errors, plot holes, or inconsistencies, as I currently do not have a beta.

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

Excerpt from Chapter 25

He has brought me home, his home, his retreat. Hermione thinks, He's showing me more and more of who he truly is. Draco's openness continually surprises her. If someone told her a year ago that Draco Malfoy would show her his soft side she would have scoffed. She ponders this and realizes she is wrong, he has shown her his vulnerability before, during sixth year. Until recently, she had pushed their encounter to the farthest recesses of her mind, not being able to reconcile the Draco by the lake and the Malfoy who let Death Eaters into Hogwarts. She is finally able to do that now. Voldemort left him no choice. She studies him, noting his relaxed posture and the smile he gives her as he shows her some ancient Roman artifact. She replays the memory of them together that day, the first time they really talked to each other. She remembers smelling what she thought was freshly mowed grass, but then realizing it was sandalwood. Then the conversation she had with Ginny this afternoon pops into her mind, Parkinson thought someone slipped him Amortentia. She closes her eyes, remembering it like it was yesterday, the smell that engulfed her was coming from Draco. Her eyes pop open. Bewildered, she looks at him and whispers, "Amortentia?"

Chapter 26

Draco stops talking, forgetting about the ancient urn he had been so keen to show Hermione. Taking a step forward, he reaches for her and feels relief when she falls into his arms. At the same time they ask, "You are?" Looking at each other with questioning expressions she says, "I thought...I had always thought it was Ron, expected it to be him." She looks up and Draco is staring intently at her and she continues, "I haven't smelled it since sixth year, that first day with Professor Slughorn, when he brewed it." The memory overtakes her and she closes her eyes, breathing in deeply. "It wasn't fresh mowed grass, it was sandalwood...oh gods Draco, it's always been you." Her eyes fly open as she is filled with concern. Her insecurities take over as she searches his face, not sure what to make of his expression. She drops her eyes and in a small voice asks, "Draco?"

He is flabbergasted. Hermione just told me I am hers. Salazar Slytherin be damed, I am hers too. When she says his name he grins. He knows it is a big and dopey, but he does not care. He picks her up and spins her around. Draco laughs and she giggles. Finally he sets her on her feet and begins, "I stole a vial of Amortentia that day. Smelling it was all that kept me sane that year. I took out almost every girl in school looking for you. Then, that day, by the lake, when I realized it was you, I was stunned, but I should not have been." He tucks a wayward curl behind her ear and leans in so their foreheads touch. "All those years, I lied to myself. I tried to believe that I hated you for your blood. But you, with your intelligence, cunning, wit and beauty are completely different from everything that was drummed into me about muggle-borns. I realized you made all those beliefs, complete garbage. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, readying himself to tell her everything, including his biggest confession, hoping she will not turn him away. When he opens his eyes, he leads her to his favorite chair where he sits and pulls her into his lap. She snuggles into him and turns sideways so she can see his face.

Draco swallows, "I used to dream about you, even when we were little. In my dreams, I was the one who was your best friend. I got to show you everything about the wizarding world. When I woke from those dreams, I would hate Weasley and Potter even more and I would torment them worse." He sighs and shakes his head. Hermione kisses his cheek, encouraging him to continue, "As we got older, the dreams continued, my subconscious kept trying to tell me what I refused to admit for years and only came to completely accept during the war. During the day, I would catch myself staring at you and I would hate myself. You were the best student in school and you never backed down from a challenge. I could not admit I admired you, so I would rant and rave to the other Slytherins about how much I hated you and your friends. Everything I felt about you, I would repress and say the opposite. My dreams continued to change as I watched you turn from a child into a pretty girl. I had been dreaming about you all summer before fourth year. Good dreams, about us being friends. I had even let myself hold on to one where the new DADA professor would not know our background and would pair his two best students together to prepare us for our O.W.L.s in fifth year and we would become friends, then more."

Draco pulls Hermione to him, hugging her even closer and continues, "Then I overheard the plans for the Quidditch World Cup and my dreams turned to nightmares. When I would wake, I would console myself, thinking you would not attend, knowing you did not like the game and only went to matches at school to support your house." Draco is caught up in the memories, his face is twisted with emotion. Hermione nods and caresses his cheek, bringing his attention back to her. She smiles, marveling at the man in front of her, "You're right. I went for the experience and to be with my friends. I didn't have a clue you knew so much about me at Hogwarts." Her words cause Draco to pull out of the emotions of the past. He kisses her gently, pouring his feelings into it. "No one knew, especially since I would not admit it to myself." He smiles briefly before he continues, "I caught a glimpse of you the morning of the match and I freaked out, knowing I had to warn you. When I finally caught up, the girl who garnered even more of my respect when you slapped me the previous year, had changed from pretty to beautiful. I was focused solely on you and all I could think of was I had to keep you safe." His words make her feel all warm inside, knowing he was warring with himself but still wanted to protect her. She shifts so she can look at him fully and sees he is lost in thought. He frowns and his voice takes on some of his old hateful qualities and he sneers when he says, "Then I saw Potter and Weasley were with you and it made me angry." His face and voice soften as he looks at her, "When I was chasing after you, for those few minutes I had thought I would be the hero, the one to save you. I told myself I was stupid and I turned around and walked back to our tent."

Hermione reaches up and caresses his cheek again, not being able to fathom what that day must have been like for him. He leans into it and sighs. "I stewed in my anger all day and later when I saw you in the Minister's box, I again thought I hated you. You were with them and all summer I had this glimmer of hope, this stupid hope in the back of my mind that we would become friends …." Draco trails off and she sees the pain in his eyes. "Then the look you gave me … so full of contempt. Gods it hurt, even though I completely deserved it for the way I treated you. In that moment I wanted you to hurt, like you hurt me. But I could not hold on to it. From the moment I sat down, my nightmares haunted me. Later on my mother asked me what I thought of the veela, when I answered 'what veela' she hugged me and told me I was a good boy. I had not even realized they were there. I was too focused on brooding over you." He punctuated his remark by running his finger down her nose and tapping the tip. "After the game, I knew I still had to protect you, so I followed you back to your campsite and hung around the periphery. When you all came running out, I trailed behind to make sure you were safe. I knew danger was close and when your daft ex tripped I could not hold my tongue. All I could think about was he should be protecting you, and here you were helping him. I kept talking, baiting you all until I knew the Death Eaters had passed behind us. I will not say I did not mean the things I said at the time, because I did. I was angry at you for giving me that look again. I was angry at them for not protecting you properly when I could not, and yes I know you were and are very capable of protecting yourself. Mostly, I was angry at myself for making sure you were safe."*

Hermione looks at Draco, hardly believing what he is saying, but she just knows it is the truth. She understands she is seeing something he usually keeps locked away, buried deep. His confession spurs her newly found love for him to blossom and take hold, rooting itself around her heart.

Draco notices she is studying him, taking in everything he tells her, so he continues, "I still dreamed and part of me held on to the little hope that my dream about being study partners was prophetic, but when the old Auror turned out to be our defense teacher, I knew it would not happen." He looks intently at Hermione and chuckles, "Actually knowing now that it was Barty Crouch, Jr., I'm surprised he did not make us work together. Apparently he really hated my family so that would have been ideal to him. But, I assume he knew he had to keep up appearances, so I got turned into a ferret instead." This makes Hermione giggle and she tries to stifle it. He gives her an incredulous look and says, "Hey, all that bouncing hurt!" Thinking of how he looked that day, she can't help laughing and he eventually joins her. "Guess that would have been a site to behold. I am sure I was the most handsome ferret you have ever seen." Glad he is able to poke fun at himself over something that had to be traumatic, she agrees, "Yes, yes, you made a very handsome and noble ferret with very pretty fur."

Once they are over the fit of laughter, he grimaces, "I need to finish telling you all this." She nods, still unsure how all this relates to Amortentia. "I continued on like before, squashing my fantasy and I kept telling myself I hated you. The dreams went away for a while when Potter was named a school champion in the Tri-Wizard Tournament. I focused on making his life miserable, and pushed you out of my mind. It worked until I saw the article that Skeeter wrote about you and Potter dating and I saw red. I watched you both for any indication that you were together, but never saw anything. I felt relief when I heard his date to the dance was one of the Patil twins. After all he would have been a fool to go with someone else if you were dating. Then, by the gods, I swear when I saw you the night of the Yule Ball, all I wanted to do was punch Krum, not hex or curse, but physically punch. I watched you all night tried to tell myself you were fickle and a tart. But, I knew you were not."

A dark look crosses Draco's face and his voice lowers, "Fifth year came. All Father talked about the summer before was that he was finally back. We would be taking our rightful place in the world soon." He scoffs. "He filled my head with all these grandiose ideals and in my naïveté I absorbed it all, not realizing what the consequences would be with his return to power. I did not think about the repercussions of there no longer being any muggle-born in our world. I had been taught you should have never been told about your powers or that Hogwarts existed. I just assumed they…" he stops speaking and gives her a tender kiss, before continuing, "you, and the others would be oblivated and then banished to the muggle world. Honestly, I felt relieved, thinking you would be safe and you would be back where you belonged and I would stop dreaming about you and both worlds would be fine. At the time, I did not think to consider the muggle world at all. I was bloody deluded."

"Father would disappear for days at a time, and sometimes upon his return I would read about something horrible that happened. At first I thought it was a coincidence, but it began happening more frequently. Then, I noticed changes in my Mother, she was becoming thinner and would pick at her food. She looked wan, but always told me she was fine, trying to protect me. The injustices I read about triggered nightmares. My subconscious was trying to force me to realize it was connected, but I did not until it was too late."

"When the school year began, I did a what a good, dutiful, brainwashed son should and followed my Father's orders and helped Umbridge. I enjoyed the privilege and the power she offered. I was the perfect Death Eater in training, with the exception of my dreams of you."

He looks at Hermione, and strokes her cheek. "Then my world came crashing down. I heard you had been badly hurt and Father had been sent to Azkaban after the incident at the Department of Mysteries. I blamed Potter for it all. Thinking he was hungering for glory. I know now all he was doing was trying to protect his godfather." Draco hangs his head. "I found my Mother openly weeping, devastated. I thought she was missing Father since it was his birthday, but I was incorrect. She rarely cried and I had never seen her like that and it added to my anger at Potter, which really was unjustified. She and I had a long talk while I was in France and she told me she had actually been relieved Father was in jail, knowing he was out of Voldermort's clutches. She was actually grieving that day because Bellatrix had just told her she killed our cousin, who you all had gone to protect. The crazy bitch took delight in telling Mother she killed the little boy she loved to play with and spoil by sending him through the veil. She had not seen him in years and knew she would never have the chance to again. She told me several stories about 'sweet little Sirius' and I told her to record them all and give them to Potter."

Draco thinks of some of the horrible things he saw and says,"Gods, that summer was horrific. When I got off the train, Mother was not there to meet me, so I waited. When everyone was almost gone, Goyle's father returned and walked to me, rolling his eyes, he said, "Don't just stand there looking daft boy, come with me." I was shocked he spoke to me that way. No one in our circles dared. Malfoys were pureblood royalty. When he put his hand on me, I recoiled and sneered at him, spitting out, 'How dare you touch me.' Then he jerked me by the arm, laughing, saying 'Your name means nothing since Lucius fucked up. Come on, The Dark Lord wants to see you.' Mother was waiting by the floo when I got home. She was fidgeting and looked horribly frail, with dark circles under her eyes. She hugged me and quietly whispered that Father had invited The Dark … Voldemort into our home to live before his arrest and she was basically a prisoner since then because of his paranoia. She warned me he expected me to take my Father's place. Then, she told me to keep my mind shielded with occlumency because he was a powerful legilimens and to be sure to keep anyone I cared about behind protective walls."

Draco looks at Hermione again, her beautiful features full of care and concern for him and he realizes something for the first time. "Several summers before, she was the one who taught me how to shield my mind. I just realized she must have had at least an inkling about you. That day, she was telling me to protect my thoughts of you from him. She knew he would use them to his advantage if he found out." Draco thinks about when his Mother practiced with him. She would always try digging into his memories of Hermione. His Father always belittled him about her making better marks and he thought it was her way of doing it as well. In response, as soon as he felt his mother searching for her, he made it a habit to throw out those awful memories of taunting Hermione and tuck his dreams away. The respect he holds for his Mother increases ten-fold. "She taught me how to keep my real thoughts and dreams about you safely hidden away." Hermione smiles, "I don't know much about her, but I know she loves you enough to risk Voldemort's wrath for you by lying to him about Harry. You take after her. You always tried your best emulate your Father when you were young, but thankfully your Mother had already impacted your life too much to become like him. Did she tell you anything else before the meeting?"

"Just to call him my lord and that she loves me. When she released me, her cheeks were wet with tears. I had not realized she was crying. That summer was the only time I have ever seen her cry and it was all due to the monster Father asked into our home. I was led into our drawing room. It was the first time I saw him and I was terrified, but swallowed it down and buried it behind my walls. I walked to him with my head bowed and called him my lord, even though saying it caused bile to rise up in my throat. He told me he had a special job for me, but I must be initiated first." Draco reaches for his mark, almost able to still fill the burn. He stares off into space, the words tumble out in a monotone as he speaks the truth of that day out loud for the first time, "There was no grand ceremony. No asking if I wanted to follow him. It was already a given, because of my Father's failure. He used his wand to rend the sleeve of my shirt from the inside of my elbow down, not caring that he cut my arm in the process. The pain of getting the mark was unbelievable, forcing me to my knees. I knew I had just been branded as his slave and there was no escape." He only tells her basic details from that horrific summer, not wanting her have to hear the horrors of what he witnessed. He does tells her a little more about the day he finds out that his mission is to kill Dumbledore. He can still hear the sound of Voldemort cackling with glee afterward. He talks about his crazy aunt's insistence that he had been given the task as an honour and that was what he repeated, even though deep down he knew it was a death sentence for him and a punishment for his father. He explains he had decided he would go to Dumbledore as soon as school started and beg him to get his Mother out, but his plan was derailed when he found out if he failed, not only would he be killed, but his parents would be too. He felt trapped, with no way out.

Draco looks at her then continues, "I had no solace until the first day of potions. After getting a whiff of Amortentia, I did not even care that I had lost the Felix Felicis potion to Potter, especially since I expected to lose it to you anyway." Hermione blushes and he kisses the tip of her nose. "I went back that night and I filled up a vial of the love potion. Smelling it was the only thing that relaxed me. I tried to figure out who it was all year. Then the day by the lake, when I woke up, I smelled the woman I had been searching for, and marveled that you had found me. When I opened my eyes, I was shocked to see you, but I should have know from the start it was you. The girl turned woman, that I had dreamed of since we were eleven. The only person I ever have had feelings for and I had been trying to repress them for years. You were sitting beside me, showing only care and concern, telling me you had been worried about me all year, when all I ever showed you was my contempt. There you were, my beautiful angel, trying to rescue me and I shattered. Angry at myself for not knowing, not seeing, and even then repressing my feelings for you. Continuing to do so, thinking you would never be with me. Only now, I am finally free enough from our past to admit to you how I feel. I love you Hermione Granger."

*If you want to read or reread, about this conversation in the Harry Potter books, it is in Goblet of Fire, Chapter 9 The Dark Mark.

If you want to reread about the day by the lake in the Auror Mentalist:

Draco's POV – Chapter 9 (I edited it somewhat so it fits in better with how the story has developed)

Hermione's POV – Chapter 15

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