Kyle's POV
"Where is she?" I ask myself as I stare at the clock on my phone. Sue has planned a day at the mall for all of us, mainly arcade games and fast food. All a teenager's vacation plan come true. We're waiting outside the mall for Charlie who hasn't arrived yet.
"Maybe you should call her again." Stan suggests.
I start clicking into Contacts before Kenny stops me, "There she is." He says as Charlie steps out from Dr. Nixon's car and walks towards us.
At first, I couldn't even recognize her. She's wearing a sweet looking white dress with dark blue floral print on it, along with black leggings that reach to her calves. Her black hair has been slightly styled to a wavier look and she's carrying a small handbag.
I'll admit, she looks a lot different from the tomboy look with sneakers and hoodies I'm used to from her.
"Charlie, nice new look." Sue greets her as she compliments Charlie's outfit, "I like the colors."
"Thanks, since it's a celebration, I thought: Why not dress up around it?" Charlie smiles as she shrugs, then swirls around in front of Kenny, "What do you think, Kenny?" She simpers.
"You look gorgeous, princess." Kenny smiles adoringly at her before going back to his playful cocky attitude as he worms his arm around her waist. "I don't know how I'm gonna keep my hand off of ya."
"I'm glad you're OK, Charlie." I say. I wasn't sure if she'd be up for an arcade day today but she seemed a lot better when she did after leaving the courthouse.
"Yeah, sorry I couldn't do this yesterday." She replies as she 'tries' to squirm away from Kenny's wandering hands, "I was a little overwhelmed." Poor girl, Kenny's not gonna let her go until she has at least 3 marks on her neck.
Thankfully Sue manages to pull Charlie away and into a headlock, "Girl, this ain't the time for apologies. This is your freedom party, you're the star. Own it!" She shouts with her free arm pumped into the sky, before calming down and saying, "Sorry, I just went full white party girl there."
We all burst out laughing at Sue's remark as we go into the food court and Man, it's packed with crying kids, antsy nerds arguing about the Wonder Woman trailer and couples on their sappy dates. We decide to split up; Sue and Tweek go to get smoothies for everyone while Kenny and Stan order our food. Charlie and I have to find a table for the six of us, luckily there's one near the exit and away from the play area where some snot-nosed kid would probably come over and knock over our fries.
"So what's gonna happen now?" I ask Charlie once we sit down.
She leans back onto the chair with a thoughtful look, "Well now I legally have the rights as an adult and I can live with Aunt Francine in peace. Not to mention I'm changing my fucking name." She scowls, "Isaac Baxton died that night on the rooftop so Charlie Baxton could live."
"That lawyer was such a dick. I can't believe he pulled that card."
"Forget about that asshole, princess." Kenny appears and hugs her from behind, "You don't have to ever see those people again if you don't want to."
"Yeah, yeah." She rolls her chocolate brown eyes as Kenny sits next to her, she simpers as she gives him a small kiss. "Thanks, Kenny."
Kenny has a smile brighter than the sun as the two feed each other fries in that sickeningly-cutesy manner that you'd see in most sitcoms. I turn away as they start to use their mouths to do it, part out of the embarrassment that they're doing this in public, and part because I kinda wish I was doing it myself, maybe with Stan.
Wait, what?
"You OK, Kyle?" Stan's voice turns me back to reality. I realize that while I was in my head, my head turned to face Stan and it looks like I was staring at him dazedly. The thought of us inching closer with a French fry between our lips flash again and I turn away, trying to calm my crazy heartbeat as I come up with an excuse.
"I'm worried about Charlie." I spit out.
"What do you mean?" Stan raises an eyebrow as he steals a glance over towards her, "If it's about Charlie's new look, maybe she just wants to be more feminine for Kenny?"
"What Mr. Solf said about her psychiatric reports, Charlie's more depressed now than when she was about to commit suicide. But look at her," I look over to see her and Kenny laughing as they act even flirtier than before, "does she look like that depressed?" I ask as I look back at Stan.
"That bastard's probably making shit up, he's been bullshitting throughout the entire trial."
"I don't think he was lying about that though. Even Dr. Nixon told me that she noticed her mood change." I respond as I feel my phone vibrate. Like the devil, I see that Dr. Nixon sends me a text.
Kyle, I need to talk to you, it's about Charlie. Please come by my office tomorrow after your classes ended.
Well, I guess that's my plan for tomorrow. I put my phone away into my pocket before pulling Stan towards a fighting game machine. I'll worry about all that crap later, right now I'm gonna play video games with my best friend and I'm gonna whoop his ass (in a totally non-sexual way, shut up).
Just as planned, I jump onto a bus after class and head towards the hospital. I keep thinking about everything that's been happening. Charlie clearly isn't as OK as she keep letting on, otherwise Dr. Nixon wouldn't have called me to talk about it. I try to go but the receptionist blocks me from going any further, she isn't in her office right now and I can't go in there because of the tools.
After half an hour of working on assignments on my laptop, Dr. Nixon appears looking a little tired as she treks grudgingly into the waiting area. "Hello, Dr. Nixon." I greet as I put away my laptop.
She has black circles around her eyes and her hair lazily tied up, Kenny told me that Charlie makes coffee for her often but she looks like she hadn't had a good night's sleep in months. "Kyle, sorry it's been a little busy and I had to do my rounds." She smiles tiredly, trying to upkeep her professionalism.
"It's Ok, you said you had something you wanted to talk about regarding Charlie." I remind her as we walk into her office.
"Yes, I believed I found the cause of her depression." She informs me as she sits down at her desk, "Have you heard of gender dysmorphia?"
I sit down on the chair across the table as I take in what Dr. Nixon said. Gender dysmorphia? I read about it, it's when someone thinks that their bodies don't represent their real gender properly. Suddenly my mind makes sense of what she's implying. "Wait you think that-"
"Gender dysmorphia includes the stress and anxiety caused from the strong repulsion of their birth-assigned genders. Charlie's still a teenager and her body's still changing and growing, just not in the way that she envisions it to be. Last weekend, she started dressing a lot more effeminate, she even asked me for high heels. But I get the feeling that it's not the only reason for the sudden severity of her depression."
"Yeah, Charlie was never that insecure about herself." She identified as a girl but she wasn't wearing pink dresses and quoting 'Mean Girls' or anything like that, she was still one of us. I notice that the first time I saw her wear something obviously feminine was yesterday during our outing, I think about the horrible events during the trial, "Do you think that court case did a number on her?"
"Well it definitely didn't help with what that bastard of a lawyer said." She scowls as she drinks the cooled coffee on her desk.
"Does Charlie know about her gender dysmorphia?"
"Yes, but I don't think she understand how much it's affecting her. I do believe she knows why though, she won't say a word about it."
She knows why, but she won't tell? Why?
"Anyways, that's not the only reason I asked you to come here today." Dr. Nixon changes the subject, "I wanted to get started on teaching you some basic bedside manner when it comes to dealing with patients, but first I need to talk to you about something. I've heard from Charlie that you have a kind of dating anxiety."
Goddammit, I wasn't expecting to have this 'talk' and Moses knows I'm not excited about it. "It's not that serious, it's not affecting my ability to lead a normal life or some shit like that." I explain as I turn away like some emo teen, "I just can't really trust myself to date."
"Can you describe what happens with it kicks in?"
"Well… I start shaking a little, then I start to sweat. If I don't calm down, that's when my heart feels like it's beating off-rhythm and my breathes become shorter. I usually calm down or run out of the place before it gets any worse than that."
"When did this start?"
I eye her suspiciously, wondering if calling me here was just a counselling session in disguise. Dr. Nixon gives me a look that just says 'Answer this question' and I comply. "After some bitch at high school played me. I couldn't trust anyone who just leaves nameless confession letters into my locker or guys who throws some sleazy pickup lines around."
"No one said that you should date whoever throws their hearts at you, that'd be reckless." She says as she hands me a glass of water.
"I know, but a part of me is jealous because I can't even do that if I wanted to. I can't just be with someone even if I know there's no strings attached, my anxiety will kick in at the thought of someone touching me like that." I wince at the thought of it. "Besides, I want an actual relationship. Not some stupid fuckbuddies deal."
"Well, you sound quite certain of that. Did you find someone you'd want to be with?"
I choke on the water once Stan's face was the only thing that comes to mind. Goddammit, Stan. I must be flushing like a fucking schoolgirl now. Stop blushing! "I got someone in mind. By the way, does Kenny know about Charlie's condition?" I explain while changing the subject, desperately trying to get rid of the pink covering my face.
Dr. Nixon smiles knowingly at my flushed complexion but follows my lead and answers, "Charlie didn't want me to tell him, she didn't know what he'd think if he found out. As a doctor, I'm not allowed to break the code of conduct. But she was willing to tell you, she wanted you to help her if things got too outta hand."
"She should've told him. Kenny's her boyfriend, he wouldn't look down on her from that."
"I think she's more worried about how he'll react. Kyle, Kenny has been one of her biggest motivators and I think she doesn't want him to worry about her." She sighs as she stirs her coffee, "She really shouldn't though. From what I've seen, Kenny's a sweet boy, a little rough and crude but I can tell he takes his responsibilities seriously he'll be more than willing to help her through it." She smiles before her face drops, "Either way, it's not my call to make."
"I guess." I say softly, thinking about what Dr. Nixon said about Kenny and Charlie. "Do you really think that they'll make it through this together?" I ask.
"I think so." She nods confidently "Love can do some pretty amazing things, I believe their love can get them through."
I sit there quietly as I ponder this. She's right. I've seen it time and time again, Butters and Charlotte, Ike and Karen. We're not perfect, we've all got problems but having someone to help us through it will be worth it. They didn't give up on each other and Stan didn't give up on me, he deserves the same chance.
I do have feelings for Stan, I've come to terms with that. Whether I feel it as strongly as he does or whether or not we'll both be happy with this, I gotta go against my brain and follow my heart on this one.
Time to make a phone call.
Stan's POV
Classes have been hectic now that assignments are almost due, finals are around the corner and I still have to figure out what I'm gonna do for my next song. Even after Hawaii, I haven't had much inspiration to write. Most of the songs I've come up with would've even made Raven cringe on how emo it is. Whatever, I'm just going to get through today and try again.
I enter the Communications building after stopping by Harbucks, only to find Sue close to passing out on the desk next to her laptop. "Hey, Sue. You look like shit."
"Thanks a lot, you dick." She glares, not really as intimidating as it usually is since she's yawning too. "I'm still technically your boss, you know."
"Yeah I know, that's why I got you this." I grin as I put down a warm cup of coffee and with a paper bag, "From your sweet 'boyfriend'."
She rolls her silver eyes but smiles as she shakes her head, "Cute. Thanks though, I need the caffeine." She takes a drink and sighs at the relief of the caffeine pumping through her system "Speaking of boyfriends, where's yours?"
"Are we seriously doing 'the girl with the gay best friend' cliché right now?" I raise my eyebrow.
"First of all, I wouldn't call us 'best friends'." She chuckles, letting me know she's joking, "Besides, I thought you were Bi."
"You know what I mean." I laugh as she starts packing her things up.
"Well, I can't be the only one with a love-life dilemma lately. Jake's been extra annoying, he recently got me some sexy tight dress." She said with a tinge of disgust in her tone. "He didn't even get it in the right size, it's two sizes too small."
"I think he's doing it on purpose."
"Geez, you think." She deadpans, giving me that 'You're a dumbass' look, "I'm giving this dress to Charlie, it'll probably fit her perfectly."
"Well I know Kenny will thank you for it." I chuckle at the thought of Kenny's reaction. Though that dress probably wouldn't last long if that was the case, I just hope Charlie would get to wear it for more than one night before Kenny ruins it.
"Tell him to drop a strawberry shortcake and the strongest cup of dark roast they have on my table and all debts have been paid." She shoves me and laughs with me before her smile falls, "This assignment is killing me and I haven't heard back from any companies yet."
Sue has been trying to get an internship job to help kick start her career but she hasn't heard anything back and it's been getting on her nerves when she thinks about it. Unfortunately for us, that also means she doesn't take mistakes and unexpected mishaps very well.
"You've got one of the best portfolios in the communications sector." I try to encourage her. "I mean, who else can show their work on the student podcast and their management on the college radio station as an example of their work?"
"This could be my last year here and I'm planning to pass the reigns to Katie, she's my best friend, plus my second-in-command. She'll run the show just fine."
"What about Jake?" I didn't know what I said until I hear it. I immediately shut up and turn to look at Sue, hopefully not ready to bite my ear off.
She isn't. Instead she looks sullen as she contemplates it, "Finding a host isn't the problem, finding a good one is. Hopefully we'll find someone before his last term." She turns to me, "Part of me wished I could ask you to take over."
"I don't think I can. With the radio show, my channel and the music career Cartman's helping me with, I don't think I'll have enough time for the podcast."
"Yeah, I figured as much. I'll find someone." She takes a breath and regaining her strong composure, "That's my problem to worry about, you just need to get in that booth and do a good job tonight."
I enter the booth to record my sessions, since finals are coming up we need to pre-record some so that we'd be free to take our time to focus on our exams than what to do for the next session. After 3 hours of recording, I wrap up the last recording session.
"That's the end of my set, I'm Stan Marsh and I wish you all good day and good night."
I take a deep breath and a gulp of water after I say my outro for the 3rd time today. Sue gives me a thumbs up, showing that the recording is good and that I'm done for the day. Man, it's 5 p.m. already? I check my phone for any message. Huh? Kyle called me a few minutes ago. Did he just call me to say something or did he ring three times? I sit there silently contemplating when Kyle calls me again.
Ring~
Ring~
Ring~
Then, it stops. Three. Three rings. That's three. Does that mean? I couldn't even finish that thought before texting him.
SM: Rly? U cereal?
KB: Correct your spelling.
KB: Super cereal. You heard the phone ring three times. I'm taking the bus home, I'll be at the stop there in 30 mins.
KB: See you there, you dork (:
I feel my face hurt a little from having a smile so big, I clutch the phone and hold it close to my chest. I probably look like a fucking retard but I don't care. I feel like a kid who just got the latest PlayStation for Christmas.
Fuck yes! I did it!
I jump out of the booth, shocking Sue who's looking at me like a madman that just escaped the asylum. But she takes one look at my shit-eating grin and the text on my phone before she mirrors it happily and gives me a high-five. "You earned it, rookie. Go get 'im."
With that, we say goodbye before I bolt out of the room. When I reach the outside of the Communications building, I jump right into my car and start driving to the bus stop. My vision and thought begin to tunnel as all I can think about is what I'm gonna do when I see him.
Maybe I'll hug him and twirl us around a little like that scene from Castle in the Sky. Maybe he'll actually let me kiss him this time.
Just that thought alone makes me press down on the gas even harder, swerving around the traffic the night Kyle and I saved Tweek. I feel like this is all some beautiful dream my lovesick mind concocted and I'm refusing to wake up. I need to see him now.
I manage to find a parking spot near the bus stop and I start running again toward the stop. I look out for a forest green ushanka and I see Kyle sitting there on the other side of the street, looking at his phone, probably listening to some Daft Punk. He's probably waiting for me.
I start waving as I call out to my hopefully-new-boyfriend, "Kyle! Hey Kyl-" My voice gets cut off from a piece of rag covering my mouth and nose with a sharp smell.
I feel someone grabbing my wrists and pulling me away from the road. "No! Kyle!" I try screaming but all that comes out are muffled cries. Suddenly I feel lightheaded. Shit, is that chloroform?! I start struggling, but it's too late. My body doesn't have enough energy to stay awake and fight the choke-hold this person has on me. My eyes slowly glaze back at Kyle, completely oblivious to what's happening. He looks so happy, so excited for me to show up, I thought before passing out.
I'm sorry, Kyle.
A/N: Surprise, a cliffhanger! Yeah, Kyle accepted Stan's confession, was there any doubt? But I am sorry that it took so long to happen, next time we see how Stan deals with his attacker.
Again, I apologize for not being on schedule with these chapters. Work and real life stuff make it really hard to motivate yourself to spend the night writing. I'll try to keep up and make it on time but don't worry, I won't drop this story c:
This chapter is shorter so I'll try to get the next one up as soon as I can. Thank you all so much for being so patient, and for helping this story get to over 40 comments and 8500 views c:
Anyways, as always feel free to check out the drama this story is based on, "It's Okay That's Love" by SBS. Please let me know what you think, reviews and comments make my day.
Take care, Loves.