Author's Note: I'm on break guys. Let the writing frenzy begin. Hope you like the chapter! Also, Happy Holidays, everybody!

Disclaimer: WolfishMoon does not own Hiromu Arikawa's Fullmetal Alchemist. She also does not own J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter. She never claims the contrary and makes no money from the online publication of this free-to-read fanwork.

The Scientist's Lament

Chapter Six

Wizardry

Edward woke blearily to the sight of red hair and a voice speaking in a language that he could not quite place. It was the voice of one clearly used to being obeyed. "What did you do, Tonks? Remus? Are you insane?"

"We didn't know what to do!" Shabby's voice came from behind him and Ed remembered his English. Shabby continued, "Tonks had an idea and we went for it."

"They're just boys! Muggle boys!" This from the mass of red hair. Said mass of red hair came into focus and Ed could now see a plump woman with red hair to her shoulders. And she was livid. "And the taller one is unspeakably thin!"

"I'm not so sure they're muggles," said Tonks. "I've never heard of a muggle who can do what the older brother can do."

Ed fought to keep his breathing even as he listened, not quite willing to give up his position yet. Granger's voice sounded from the other end of the room. "Here it is!" she said, "I've got the spell."

"Thanks, Hermione," Tonks said. "I know Mad Eye went over it with me at some point but I could not for the life of me remember!"

Ed heard the distinct sound of a book changing hands. Tonks took a breath in preparation to speak and it was here that Ed rolled off of the kitchen table, and squatted beneath it. "Don't you dare, bastard!" he said in Amestrian.

"Aaand he wakes," this from Tonks.

"Mr. Elric? It's okay, we're not going to hurt you," said Red.

"Not goink to hurt me?" Ed asked, crouching low with one hand on the table leg to keep it steady - Alphonse was still atop it after all. "You haff already hurt me! Knockt me out somehow and brought me and my brozer to zis place!"

"Well," Tonks said, hair drooping longer around her heart shaped face. "When you put it like that..."

"We didn't have many other options," Lupin said. "We're supposed to erase the memories of muggles and we couldn't be sure if you were one, and if you were what we should do, given that you've clearly had experience with wizards before."

Ed's eyes widened. "You haff no right to erase people's memories!"

"It's policy," Tonks said. "Not much we can do about it but obey."

"Zat's crazy."

The entire group looked to the table, for it was not Ed who had spoken, but Al. He was sitting up, amber eyes angry and accusatory. "I've been avake for a vhile. Voke up before brozer, really."

"Vhy didn't you say somezing, Al?"

Al huffed. "Same reason as you, brozer."

Ed blinked. Al was perhaps becoming a little too much like him. He wasn't sure how Al managed to get through the troubles in Amestris unchanged and then start to emotionally morph now that they were in a rather less dire situation.

"Zis is besides zee point," Alphonse continued. "Brozer and I did not trust you, precisely, but vee had agreed for at least truce. And vee expekted it to be respekted. Now you zay you vant to erase our memories?"

"You heard Tonks," said Shabby. "We didn't have a choice and we were going to test you for a magical core before we obliviated you."

"Zis obliviate is zee mesod for zee erasure of memories?" Ed asked, looking directly at Shabby's yellowish eyes.

"Yes," it was Red who answered, arms folded under her breasts. "And while I think they're crazy for approaching you children at all, it would be the best option moving forward for your own safety if you turn out to indeed be muggles."

Ed looked at her. "I am scientist. My mind iz most important asset. I do not vant it tampered vith. Zat goes for Alphonse too. Vee haff studied chemistry und physics since vee vere four."

"It wouldn't hurt your memories of your ordinary life," Granger said. "Only remove and replace the magical ones."

"Even zat is unacceptable," Ed said, crossing his arms, left hand closing over his emaciated elbow. Who knows what he would loose? Given his unusual set of memories, it was impossible to know what would be gone.

"You said you vere goink to test us?" Al asked, extending his hands palm up. Imploring. Granger nodded. "Do it."

Ed looked at his brother sharply, but when Al nodded at the window, Ed understood the plan. If these wizards tried anything they would alchemically blast themselves through the outer wall and out of the building.

Tonks gulped from the right and raised her wand, hand steady despite her obvious nervousness; her hair had turned into a sort of pea green.

The entire room held their breath as she said the words, firmly, clearly. Alphonse lit up like a light bulb, but Ed did not. And to hide a certain amount of horror, Ed could not stop from smirking.

Hermione stared as her teacher's younger brother shone. Beside her, Tonks let out a delighted laugh. "Never seen that one done before," Tonks said, eyes glittering. "Didn't reckon it'd be so pretty!"

She watched as Alphonse looked at his hands in a sort of wide eyed wonder. It was so beautiful, if fact, that it hardly registered with her that the elder Elric wasn't glowing. But he was smirking.

"Told you it vasn't magic," he said, looking at his hands with a sort of wry satisfaction. That caught Hermione's attention, but he too was watching Al from the corner of his eye, she could tell.

"Your brother's a wizard and that's all you have to say, Professor?" She put her hands on her hips and stared him down.

"So he can do zis magik hocus pocus," Ed said, eyes blazing with certainty. "It vould be like a certain bastard vee know. But mien bruder and I are men ov science. It doesn't change anyzink."

"Are you so sure about that?" Hermione asked, jerking her head towards the younger brother. Alphonse was still looking at his hands in wonder. His hands raised to eye level, his long sleeves rode up his wrist. Hermione saw skin resting just atop bone and she blinked. She'd not noticed the level of atrophy and it was almost terrifying to see.

Alphonse started when he seemed to notice her watching and brought his hands to his sides, tugging the sleeves back in place - but it was too late. She could see it now, the protruding tendons in his neck, the sallowness in his face - particularly beneath protruding cheekbones

Al visibly squared his shoulders. "I am scientist," he said, but Hermione was almost certain that he was reassuring himself, as well as asserting himself to the room. "My life has been based on zee principles ov equifalent exchange. I von't change now."

Mrs. Weasley bustled over to him, taking bony shoulders in her hands. "You must at least learn some," she said. "It'll go out of control on you if you don't."

"It's amazing it hasn't done so yet," said Professor Lupin. Tonks flicked her wand to dispel the spell; the glow faded.

"Out ov control how?" Alphonse asked, wringing his bony, bony hands.

"People have died," said Professor Lupin. Mrs. Weasley removed her hand's from Alphonse's shoulders and shot Lupin a glare, mouth suddenly pursed very thin.

Hermione decided to interject. Nervously tugging on a bushy lock of hair, she spoke up. "Disregarding all that, magic is incredible to use. And a scientific eye makes it all more fun. Not less."

Mrs. Weasley gave Hermione an approving look for that - Hermione felt certain that Mrs. Weasley did not appreciate Lupin's bluntness with one as young as Alphonse.

Professor Elric shook his head. "Don't veed us bullshit, Granger," he said. "Iv not learning iz life zreatening, zat iz vhat vee need to know." His next sentence was muttered and Hermione only caught snatches. But it ran something along the lines of damning the trust - or truth? - and of course the bastard would.

Professor Elric was the most vulgar professor Hermione ever had and it was starting to wear her nerves thin. But while a part of her brain was wondering about the mutters, the larger part of her understood his point.

"Understood, Professor. Sorry." But Elric was done with her. He had turned to Lupin, Tonks, and Mrs. Weasley.

"You say mein bruder could die vrom zis magic stuff."

The three of them nodded. "He could," Lupin said. "He would not be the first."

"Zen I schould learn," Al said quietly. "Avter everyzing vee did? I von't loose zis body now. Not vrom pride."

That had Hermione wondering. This man and boy walked like Mad-Eye for a reason. What had they been into? Al's sentence and the look on Ed's face were viable clues - she just needed to figure out in what direction to look.

"Ja, naturlich." Professor Elric's face was drawn and serious in a way Hermione had not seen it.

Mrs. Weasley bustled between them, taking Alphonse by the hand - looking for all the world like a hen ruffling her feathers - and said, "Well then. We'll get you learning in no time. I'll contact Minerva. She'll know how we might best proceed."

"Tonks can -" Lupin looked at Tonks, froze, started again. "I can send Professor McGonagall a patronus."

Tonks stared at the ground awkwardly. "I'm sorry," she said. Her hair drooped down to her collar bone and Hermione internally sighed. It was no use getting so sad that you couldn't work your magic right.

Hermione felt like kicking herself. She knew that wasn't fair.

"Right," Mrs. Weasley said, diffusing the tension. "I'll get dinner started. Alphonse? Why don't you sit in the kitchen with me? We can get some food in you immediately."

"Vas?" Al asked. "I can vait viz everyvone else!"

"No. No, you're much to thin. Off you go. Through there." And Mrs. Weasley bustled the helpless Al to the kitchen.

As Professor Lupin and Tonks went out the back door to cast the patronus, Hermione heard Lupin say, "I can help you get it back, you know. Took me a while too."

And unless she was very much mistaken, Hermione could see Tonks lean into him slightly before nodding.

And then there were two.

"And vhen can vee expekt to go home?" Professor Elric asked the otherwise empty air. He muttered something probably unpleasant in German.

Hermione looked at her chemistry teacher. "Would you go over the homework while we wait for dinner?" she asked. "I'm having trouble with he calculations for this chapter."

But that was a lost cause. For just as Hermione suggested it, a windblown Ron and Ginny came in, brooms slung over their shoulders.

"Who's this, Mione?" Ron's hands gripped his broomstick defensively and Hermione knew she was in for a long night. No one was quite ready for strangers, she knew. Dumbledore's Army least of all.

Word Count: 1828

Author's Note: Tonks continues to be a lump. And even writing cannon romance that I can't take out gives me a headache. Wolfy no like. Another PSA. Cannon pairings are my friend. Cannon pairings will probably stay. They will not be a large part of this story. But you can't do book six without giving them at least token mention - they're big part of the book.

Additionally, I would like to thank the FOURTEEN people who reviewed. That was crazy. Last chapter brought a huge jump in review count, favorites, follows, views, and visitors. I am stunned. We're at the 42 review mark and I have to say that I never thought that fanfiction would be the Ultimate Answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything. Thank you so much, guys.

Anyway, I know lots of you were looking forward to this confrontation. I hope you like how it played out. And it's not quite over. We have some ground to make before we get Ed back into the muggle classroom.