The Blue Pheasant Flies On
Chapter 20: Easier than Expected
Lucy hummed to herself as she made her way to the guild. She had been a Fairy Tail mage for two weeks now and had settled in quite nicely. She had found a place where the rent was cheaper than the rooms at Fairy Hills and had already done a few small jobs around Magnolia Town to get used to how the guild system worked. Her downtime had been spent with her new friends and guildmates. Her shopping trip with Lisanna had transformed from Natsu replacing her clothes into a day trip that introduced Lucy to all of Magnolia's sights and where the best stores and restaurants were. The trio had returned to the guild for dinner and Lucy had quickly been taken in by the couple's antics and spent so much time laughing and talking that her food had grown cold (until Natsu noticed and warmed it back up for her, nearly setting her on fire in the process).
Later, Lisanna introduced Lucy to her siblings. She quickly learned that Elfman was a big softie under his tough appearance and outbursts about how manly things were and Mirajane—or Mira, as she insisted every Fairy Tail member called her—was the real person to watch out for. The way the short woman had easily dominated her much larger brother and her fellow S-Class Natsu during the roughhousing she instigated let Lucy know that she never wanted to piss the 'Demon' off.
The next day, Laki had introduced her to Levy and her team. Lucy had instantly hit it off with the blue-haired woman. Levy was the biggest bookworm she had ever met, even bigger than Lucy herself. They had spent hours talking about books they had read and recommending their favorites. Lucy hadn't even noticed how much time had passed until Nab had interrupted their conversation to kick them out so he could close up the guild. Levy had headed home with a promise to show Lucy around Fairy Tail's library the next day.
Laki, Bisca, Alzack, Natsu, Lisanna, Levy. Lucy had barely been part of Fairy Tail but she had already made more friends and had more fun than she had her entire life as the sole heiress of the Heartfilia Kozern. And it was so much more fulfilling than spending all of her time learning boring things like etiquette and finances back at the mansion. Every day was an adventure of her own choosing. Today she'd be going out on a job with Levy and who knew what tomorrow would bring? Lucy was so excited!
Lucy heard Fairy Tail's chaos before she saw the guild and knew that she'd be walking into a warzone. Sure enough, Natsu and Gray were already at each other's throats over something Lucy knew would be stupid. She avoided the danger zone with an ease that she had quickly picked up on pain of becoming collateral to the two S-Class mages' fight and slid into what had become her usual spot.
"Good morning."
"Morning, Lucy," Alzack, Bisca, and Laki replied.
"What set them off this time?"
Alzack shrugged. "I think it was something about whether a Forest or Mountain Vulcan is tougher."
Lucy's sigh was accompanied by an eyeroll. Yep. Something stupid alright. "I swear, those two would argue over whether the North or South Pole was colder."
"I think they have," Bisca said, getting a quick round of chuckles out of the table. "At least they're not as bad as Mira and Erza."
Laki and Alzack nodded and made sounds of agreement while Lucy tilted her head, not understanding what they were talking about. "Oh, I forgot you haven't met her yet." Bisca said after seeing the blonde's confusion. She began to explain, "Erza's another S-Class member of the guild, about as strong as Mira. Those two have apparently been butting heads since they were kids. If you think Natsu and Gray are bad, you should see those two go at it." A shudder ran through the seasoned Fairy Tail members. "I'm surprised the guild's still standing."
The explanation surprised Lucy. She knew Erza through reputation only and the papers made the 'Scarlet Knight' seem like a serious woman that always completed her missions with the utmost efficiency and minimal collateral damage. She bluntly denied every attempted interview and was known for terrifying dark mages and criminals into surrendering just by showing up to a fight. The thought of the mage from the papers getting into childish fights didn't compute in Lucy's mind. Though, if anyone could provoke someone so serious into fighting it would be Mira. The white-haired woman had a wicked tongue and made sure that everyone knew it.
She had also been runner-up in Fairy Tail's 'Most Likely to Swing First' poll after Natsu for four years straight according to Nab, so that probably played a factor.
Another pair of rivals that fought on sight? What was in Magnolia's water that made everyone so violent?
"Ah, it's just them and their teams," Bisca answered a surprised Lucy. The blonde hadn't realized that she had spoken out loud. "They've all been clashing since they were kids. I heard they inherited it from their masters."
"Masters?"
"Yeah." Alzack lazily pointed to the various guild members with his fork as he grouped them under their teachers. "Back in the day, the S-Class mages took you under their wings and taught you how to fight if you were a kid. 'Frost Giant' Kuzan trained Erza and Levy; 'The Strongest Man in the West' Gildarts trained the Strausses, and Natsu; and 'Ice Rose' Ur trained Gray, Jet, and Droy. Apparently, Gildarts's students don't get along with Ur and Kuzan's students and vice versa."
"Wow," Lucy quietly said in awe. Those were big names in the magical community, considered to be some of the strongest on the continent. To be trained by one of them since you were a kid? No wonder they were so strong. Even Levy! Lucy could hardly imagine the waifish bookworm fighting back-to-back with Gray. Now she really wanted to go on that job with her and her team to see them all in action!
Speak of the devil, Levy's voice came from behind Lucy, shocking the blonde. "Come on, Alzack! We aren't all that bad." The blue-haired girl slid next to Lucy with a greeting and pouted at the gunslinger.
"Don't you pull that innocent act on me. I've been on a job with Jet, Droy, and Elfman."
Levy didn't have a response for that. "Fine," she acquiesced. "But at least Lisanna and I aren't that bad."
"I don't know, Levy. The whispers around the guild's walls claim that you used to clash your intelligence with a rival named Cana during your apprenticeships under the Frost Giant and Strongest Man," Laki interrupted.
"That was years ago! I'm better now!" Levy insisted while waving off Laki's accusation. But Lucy noticed the way she flinched at the mention of Cana's name and how her knuckles were white around her glass. Years of intense people watching at social parties where every comment was a probing attack and even the most honeyed words were filled with barbs let Lucy know that Levy really didn't want to talk about this Cana person.
She changed the subject by asking Levy what she thought about the surprise twist in a mystery novel they had both read recently. It wasn't her smoothest topic shift, but as she let the smaller woman's go on about her theories for what this meant for the upcoming sequel and watched the rest of the table's attention drift away, Lucy figured it was good enough.
The first sign of Erza's approach was when the drinks started rippling.
Lucy didn't notice it at first, too busy laughing over a rather embarrassing story Bisca was telling about a job she went on with Alzack while holding off the man in question with one hand as he desperately tried to cover her mouth. But, as the distinct sound of heavy footsteps and clinking metal became audible, the normal chaos of Fairy Tail quickly disappeared until Lucy was the only one making any noise louder than a whisper.
Her laughter died as she noticed how loud and out of place it was in the tense atmosphere of the guild. Fairy Tail now had more in common with a funeral home than its usual frat party. "Uh, what's going on?" Lucy nervously asked.
"She's back…" Alzack, Bisca, and Laki muttered in trepidation at the same time that Levy perked up and excitedly declared, "Erza's back!"
The two opposing reactions did little to clarify whether Erza's return was a good or bad thing. Lucy resolved to wait and see for herself. But why were the footsteps so loud? Was Erza a giant? A monster? Severely overweight?
It turned out that Erza wasn't giant, but the massive horn covered in decorative jewels and gilded with gold she was effortlessly carrying over one shoulder was. She set it down with a boom that made the mugs bounce and looked around the guild while everyone was staring at her. "I'm back," she needlessly announced.
"Welcome back, Er-chan!" Levy shouted as she ran up to hug the taller woman.
Erza's severe expression relaxed, and she was briefly covered in a bright light that removed her gauntlets and replaced her breastplate with a white blouse that went nicely with her blue skirt. It certainly made the hug Levy was pulled into much softer as her head was buried in the young woman's generous chest instead of bouncing off of magically reinforced steel. "Hello, Levy-chan. It's good to see you too."
What a nice scene. Lucy didn't see what everyone was panicking about. Sure, Erza looked really intimidating at first with that no nonsense glare, but she seemed really sweet.
"Levy, you wouldn't happen to have anything to do with the rumors I've heard about graffiti coming to life and causing all sorts of problems for Phantom Lord, would you?" Erza asked.
Levy's eyes shot open in fear, and she tried to laugh off the question. "What? Me? No. Of course not. Why would I know anything about that?" she stammered while trying to subtly pull out of Erza's hug, but her older sister's grip was like a vice.
"Because it sounds an awful lot like something you'd do to antagonize Phantom. It also sounds a lot like something that Sensei has repeatedly told us not to do," Erza reminded her. She then shuffled Levy around to free one of her arms while still keeping the other hooked around her neck. "But I know you'd never cause trouble like that, right?" her actions clearly showing her lack of faith in Levy.
Levy desperately tried to come up with an excuse that Erza would accept and came up blank. "Uh… it was an accident?"
"Try again."
"Jet and Droy dared me to?" She tried, dragging her friends down with her and making them shout in disbelief at the betrayal.
"You've used that one," was Erza's flat reply. The two betrayed mages cried out in relief and triumph only for Erza's eyes snap over at them and quickly destroy the hope that they'd make it out unscathed. "I have my own questions for them." The cocky smirks the pair had been wearing quickly turned to terror. "Giant plants bursting out of Phantom's branch guilds? Reports of a brown blur harassing Phantom members? Ring any bells?" she asked with narrowed eyes.
Jet and Droy suddenly found the ceiling and floor very interesting to look at and both spontaneously started practicing their whistling, which was very out of tune and clearly needed some work.
Erza then spun in place (lifting Levi's feet off the ground) and snapped her free hand out to point at Gray, who had been trying to slink out of the front door while Erza was occupied. "And where do you think you're going, Gray?! I heard about your streaking incident. Ur may not be home but that doesn't mean that you get to run around in your birthday suit! I can sew your boxers on just as well as she can!"
"Shit," Gray swore under his breath. When Ur threatened to sew his pants on he knew she wouldn't go through with it. Erza, on the other hand, would. He didn't have a way out of this, he was already down to just his boxers from fighting Natsu. Erza wouldn't believe any of his excuses. And she couldn't sew worth a damn either. All her stitches were uneven. He was screwed.
Speaking of Natsu, the Dragon Slayer heroically (stupidly) chose that moment to open his mouth and draw everyone's attention. "Ha! Serves you right, Snow cone!"
Erza spun back around (sending Levy's legs flying again and leaving the blue-haired woman resigned to being swung around like a doll) to turn on Natsu. "What are you so happy about, Natsu? Didn't the paper just report that you burnt down Hargeon Port?"
Natsu's face rapidly paled as he realized his mistake by drawing Erza's attention, but Mira stepped in to save his hide. "Ha! Did the villagers give you a high horse to go with that horn, Erza?" she asked with a sneer.
Instantly, Erza's personality did a complete one-eighty. Her stoic, unamused expression changed into one of annoyance at the sound of her rival's voice. With an about-face that left Levy's legs swinging—and the blue-haired girl forced to hold the hem of her dress down to keep from inadvertently flashing the guild—Erza marched right up to Mira so that they were chest to chest (puberty having left them unable to go nose to nose like they used to without leaning forward at a ridiculous angle). "Oh? Is that jealousy I hear, Mira?"
"As if!" Mira snorted. "Who'd be jealous of a walking tin can like you? We heard you coming a mile away in that scrap metal. How you manage to not frighten away the monsters you kill is your real magic."
"Better than being a walking porn mag. Tell me, how often do mothers covered their kids' eyes when you walk down the street?"
"Uptight nitpicker."
"Slutty punk."
"Bitch."
"Whore."
"You wanna take this outside? Gramps won't be back from the Guild Master's Meeting until tomorrow so there's no one left to hide behind."
Erza matched Mira's challenging smirk in anticipation of throwing down with her rival before she remembered why she had come straight back to the guild instead of dropping off the village's gift in one of her rooms at Fairy Hills. With visible reluctance, Erza backed down from Mira's challenge. "…no."
Mira was already heading for the door and cracking her knuckles, "That's what I like to hear! I'm going to shove my—wait. What?"
"I have something more important to take care of right now."
"How important?" Mira asked, unwilling to directly offer her rival assistance, but if it was important enough for Erza to pass up a chance to spar then whatever it was wasn't to be taken lightly.
"Nothing you have to worry about," Erza replied, waving off Mira's concerns. "Levy-chan and I will be more than enough to handle it."
The white-haired woman crossed her arms and leaned back against the doorframe. "Hmph. You'd better not take too long. I'll be waiting to start our fight when you get back."
"Count on it."
Erza turned and scanned the room for Levy. Unable to locate her, she strode over to their usual table and approached Jet and Droy—they were never far from Levy, still infatuated with her even years after she had turned them both down in quick succession. "Where did Levy run off to? I wanted her help with a problem."
The two men look at Erza in confusion and share a look. A quick game of rock-paper-scissors left Droy the one to tell Erza. "You never let go of her," he said while pointing to her side where a limp Levy was dangling from the redhaired mage's grip.
"Levy-chan!" Erza cried out in distress. The blue-haired mage was held up in front of Erza's face. "I'm sorry! Wake up! Please hit me for being so thoughtless!" she demanded while shaking the unconscious mage.
After Jet and Droy managed to get Erza to calm down and quite shaking Levy, she quickly recovered and agreed to Erza's request. Then after lightly bopping her on the head, she listened to what she actually wanted help with.
"I'm sorry, Er-chan," Levy said with palms pressed together. "I'd love to help, but I promised Lu-chan that I'd go on a job with her today."
"'Lu-chan'?" Erza repeated in confusion. There hadn't been anyone in the guild with a name like that, especially one that Levy was close enough to give a nickname to. Erza was the only one she had ever given a nickname to. Erza's eyes narrowed. This required immediate investigation. "Who's this 'Lu-chan'?"
Excited at the chance for her sister to meet her new friend, Levy dragged a clearly nervous and uncomfortable Lucy into the conversation. "This is Lu-chan! Natsu brought her here to join while you were gone, but she's really great! She loves reading and will be joining our book club!"
"I-it is nice to m-meet you," Lucy nervously greeted the S-Class mage, who was much more intimidating up close. "My name is Lucy."
"Nice to meet you," Erza replied woodenly while offering her hand. Lucy's quick shake and soft hands didn't do the blonde any favors, though her grip was surprisingly firm. While looking her over, Erza's eyes zeroed in on the key holder on her hip. "A Celestial Spirit Mage?"
"Uh, yes!" Lucy answered, surprised that Erza recognized her keys. Most people needed an explanation of her magic. "I have three gold keys and four silver ones."
"Hm," was Erza's neutral response. Forming and maintaining contracts with seven spirits was impressive, but if that was all she could do then she could get severely injured or killed if she lost them or couldn't summon a spirit: like what had happened to Karen from Blue Pegasus. "Anything else?"
Lucy was thrown off by the lack of response to her keys, especially since she had recognized them. There were only twelve Gold Celestial Spirit Gate Keys in the world and Lucy had a quarter of them! "Uh… I can use a whip?" she awkwardly admitted. If super rare magic items couldn't impress her then there was no way her nonmagical whip would win her any points.
"Really? How good are you with it?" Erza curiously asked, instantly disproving Lucy's assumptions. "How long have you been practicing?"
Now caught off-guard for a different reason, Lucy wasn't sure what to do. She hadn't been expecting to get sized-up like a potential suitor just because she was friends with Levy. The blue-haired mage in question wasn't any help; she was just giving her a thumbs up and a smile. That didn't exactly give Lucy any hints of what to do. "Um, I would say I am fairly proficient. I have been practicing since I was a child." Her father had agreed that she should learn how to defend herself in case of an attempted kidnapping before she had been strong enough to summon one of her mother's spirits to defend her. He hadn't cared what she learned to defend herself, just that she showed results. After she had successfully summoned Aquarius, he stopped caring about her progress, but Lucy had kept at it and become quite skilled by the time she was a teen.
Erza closely studied Lucy's face for a moment, leaning in uncomfortably close before announcing her decision. "Alright. You may join Levy and I!"
"What?"
"Since Levy already promised you that you two would do a job together today and I want her assistance it would be best if you join us," Erza explained as if it should have already been obvious. "You seem capable of handling yourself in a fight, so you shouldn't be a burden."
Well, that was a resounding endorsement of someone that had never even seen her fight Lucy cynically noted. And she hadn't even asked if she wanted to help! Lucy wasn't going on a job with Levy just because she wanted to hang out with her friend—she would much rather do that here in the guild. "I actually need that job to help pay my rent for the month. I forgot to account for the security deposit and am a little light on funds at the moment." Seventy thousand jewels a month for the spacious two-story apartment she had found was a steal, but one hundred forty thousand jewels was a huge chunk out of her savings. Thank the gods she hadn't had to pay for all of those replacement clothes.
Erza nodded. "Understandable. Fairy Hills can be expensive when you're just starting out." She turned to her sister, "Levy, can I see the job and a pen?"
"Sure, but what do you need the pen for?"
Erza flipped the flyer over and scribbled something on the back of the flyer. She thrust it into Lucy's hands. "I believe that should cover it."
Lucy accepted the piece of paper and quickly scanned it. Her confusion turned to surprise, and she pulled the flyer closer to her face to be sure that she was reading it correctly? "F-four hundred thousand jewels?!"
"Is that not enough? I figured that if you and Levy-chan split it that should cover you for two months. I can increase the reward if that isn't' enough," Erza offered.
"No! This is enough. It is more than enough! What do you need, Erza-sama?!" Lucy asked, eager to get started. Two hundred thousand jewels?! That was almost three months' worth of rent! She was ready to get this job started! Greed had taken control of Lucy's actions and shoving her concerns to the side. It wasn't enough to completely blind her though, "Ah, that is, if Levy-chan is willing to change our plans." She didn't want to decide for the both of them when Levy was the one that had invited her to do the job in the first place.
"Of course! This will be great!" Levy proclaimed while hooking her arms through Erza and Lucy's. Lucy had passed the first test! Now her sister and best friend were going to be getting along. All three of them would be together, this was great! Now all that was left was to introduce Lucy to Kuzan! …After finishing whatever this thing that Erza wanted help with was.
"What are we supposed to be doing, Er-chan?"
"I'll explain on the train. Meet me at the station in half an hour."
Lucy slid into the train car next to Levy and across from Erza. There had been no problems getting onto the train outside of a slight delay as the station manager and several employees were needed to load the truly excessive amount of luggage Erza had brought. It was practically another train car itself! Levy had told her it was going to be a quick job that wouldn't even take the day. Lucy hadn't even packed a change of clothes!
Onibus wasn't that far from Magnolia, so Erza began her explanation with no preamble, "On my way back from my last job, I stopped in a mage bar and overheard several mages complaining about something called 'Lullaby' that was locked behind a complex magic seal." It was hard not to overhear them with how loudly they were griping in the small bar. "One of the men said that he could break the seal and sent the others back to tell their boss that he wouldn't be long."
"That's not really our problem, Er-chan. What's got you worried about those guys?"
"Their boss's name is Erigor."
"Damn," Levy swore as she bit her thumbnail.
"Who is Erigor?" Lucy asked, feeling left out. He had to be bad news if an S-Class mage like Erza needed help to deal with him. And Levy recognized his name right away, which meant he had to be somewhat famous.
"He's the ace of the Eisenwald guild," Erza explained. "Thanks to him, they became famous for taking illegal assassination jobs. It earned him the nickname 'Shinigami' and Eisenwald the attention of the Magic Council. They were forced to disband and their master was imprisoned, but Erigor was never caught. It seems that the rest of the guild rallied around him and have become a Dark Guild."
Lucy began to sweat nervously. Wasn't this supposed to be an easy job? Why did she get dragged into taking down a Dark Guild lead by a guy who specialized in killing people?! Why didn't Erza bring another S-Class mage for this? "…so you need our help taking down the entire guild?"
"Oh, no," Erza quickly dissuaded her. "I can easily handle them all by myself." Eisenwald was just a small fry compared to some of the guilds she had taken down in her career. She had defeated stronger guilds before she had made S-Class. The only person that might pose a threat was Erigor himself—and whatever the "Lullaby" was.
"Thank the gods," Lucy said, feeling a huge weight fall off her shoulders. Then she realized how that sounded and tried to walk it back. "I-I-I mean, not that I couldn't help! Just, a whole Dark Guild is a lot to handle by yourself, you know?" She said, to the woman that had just said that it wasn't. "I-I-I…," Lucy's mouth was going faster than her brain, which was spinning its wheels trying to come up with a way to get her foot out of her mouth.
Levy took pity on her friend. It was always tough going on your first job with Erza. Fortunately, she had lots of practice! "What do you need our help with, Er-chan?"
"I need you to help me track down Eisenwald with your magic. The bar was in Onibus so that should be a good place to start." It was the only lead they had. Erza didn't know where Lullaby was supposed to be sealed and today was supposed to be the day the Eisenwald member returned with it. She slammed her fist into the armrest in frustration, making Lucy jump with a squeak that Erza missed and Levy giggled at. Damn the trains! She had lost valuable time walking home because they refused to let her bring her horn aboard.
"No problem! We'll track them down in a jiffy and kick their asses!" Levy confidently stated.
"You can do that with your magic, Levy-chan?" Lucy asked in surprise. She had thought that Levy's Solid Script could just make things appear when she wrote them out. What could she make that would allow them to find an entire guild?
"Yep! I won't be able to find the guild, but if it's a person, thing, or place I can find it no problem!"
"That's amazing! How can you do it?"
Levy grinned at the chance to show off. A lot of people underestimated her magic, including herself at first. But with Kuzan's help in thinking outside the box, she had managed to develop all kinds of tricks with her magic. "Watch." Levy held out a finger and wrote "Track" on the back of her hand. "With this, I can track down anything I'm thinking of." It did require a lot of concentration and a constant input of magic though." Let's try Eisenwald."
"Track" spun wildly like a compass needle and didn't stop. After several seconds Lucy asked, "Is it supposed to do that?"
Levy frowned in disappointment. "No. It doesn't work on concepts, so I guess they don't have a guild building anymore."
"Try Erigor," Erza suggested.
Levy concentrated and the word spun until it was pointing towards the front of the train. "It worked!"
"Perfect." Erza smiled fondly at her little sister and ruffled her hair, making Levy swat at her in protest. "With your help this won't take any time at all."
'If it was going to be that fast, why did she bring all of that luggage?' Lucy wondered. Aloud, she said, "Can you track Lullaby too?"
"Let's see."
To the trio's surprise, the word spun around on Levy's hand and pointed to the back of the train.
"That's weird," Levy muttered to herself. "I thought for sure that they'd be in the same direction.
"Unless the Eisenwald member hasn't delivered it yet," Erza said while rising to her feet.
"You don't think that they're on the train with us, do you?" Lucy asked, once again sweating in fear.
"There's only one way to find out. Levy, lead the way."
The blue-haired mage started walking down the aisle with her arm outstretched to keep an eye on her spell. Erza followed behind with her armor on and eyes darting from every face in the train, looking for someone she recognized. Lucy followed in the rear, one hand on her keys and the other on her whip. Eventually, the word began to move and they stopped in front of a car with only a single occupant.
The young man inside had black haired pulled back into a short, spiky ponytail and was wearing a white collared shirt. He looked up at the three women with a scowl on his face. "What do you want…" he began but trailed off when he recognized Erza's distinctive red hair. She had been at the bar when his idiot guildmates couldn't keep their mouths shut. "Oh shit."
Before anyone could react, Erza was in the car and had buried her fist into the man's stomach. He coughed out bile from the blow and then found himself pinned to the window by his neck. "B-bitch."
"Where's Lullaby?" Erza demanded.
"Er-chan! I found it!" Levy immediately answered. She had kept her eye on the spell and watched it follow the man's bag. A quick peek inside had revealed a wooden flute that had a three-eyed skull carved on one end and ended in plant roots. "And it looks really evil."
The man in her grip mentally swore. If he let these goody-two shoed flies take Lullaby from him Erigor would have his head.
"Wait a minute. I recognize that flute!" Lucy exclaimed. "That's the flute the dark wizard Zeref turned into a weapon of mass destruction. Anyone that hears its song will die!"
And the blonde recognized the flute. Great. This whole job just had to go tits up when he was right at the finish line. Perfect. Just his luck. Kageyama—the Eisenwald mage—activated his magic and sent a fist made of shadows crashing into Erza's chin. He pushed off the wall at the same time to make a lunge for the blue-haired girl, planning to break free of the woman's grip while she was distracted. Instead, her grip didn't change at all and he just ended up choking himself with his attempted escape. He glanced back at Erza to find her unimpressed gaze and raised armored fist.
"Bad move."
"Ah, fuck."
Erza hefted Lullaby in her hands. It was surprisingly light for such a dangerous weapon. To think that something so small and fragile could take the lives of anyone in hearing range. You didn't even have to be good at playing it, you just had to blow air into the skull. Such a small action could cause so much death. What an awful weapon Zeref had created.
"What are we going to do now, Er-chan?" Levy asked. They had interrogated Kageyama after he had woken up from Erza's punch. The man had initially been too stubborn to say anything, even at swordpoint. Then Levy had scrawled "talk" across his forehead and he spilled everything.
"Kageyama said that Erigor was waiting for him at Kunugi Station. It would be a shame to keep him waiting," she replied with a vicious smile. "After all," Erza tossed Lullaby into the air and requipped to her favorite sword. Demon Blade Benizakura flashed through the air and split Lullaby in two with no issue, "someone should tell him what happened to the flute he went through all the trouble to get."
Levy's grin was just as wolfish as Erza's own. The blue-haired and red-haired women chuckled darkly as a great wail rose from the remains of the Lullaby flute and a surge of evil magic was dispersed into the air above them, painting the pair in a demonic purple glow.
Off to the side, Lucy was sweating buckets. Why did she have to get dragged on this job with two crazy people? Was it too late to go back to Fairy Tail where her biggest worry was if Natsu was going to burn her clothes off on a job?
The train pulled into the Kunugi Station and the wheels had barely stopped screeching before the people on the platform drowned it out with their screams. A group of thugs obnoxiously cackled and leered at the fleeing civilians. They were led by a lanky man with spiky silver hair that covered his left eye. His bare chest was covered in tattoos with a small matching one under his visible eye. A scythe with a skull ornament was resting against his shoulder. "Out of the way, flies."
On the train, the Fairy Tail mages watched the chaos on the platform. "Wow. They just marched right in. We didn't even need the tracker," Levy said with a hint of disappointment as she dispelled her magic. The sheer audacity of the Eisenwald Guild left her impressed.
"That just makes our job easier," Erza replied with a savage grin. She rolled her neck with audible pops. "Let's go say hello."
Lucy did a doubletake as Erza headed for the door, apparently going for a direct confrontation instead of trying to ambush them. "That's a lot of people…" There had to be over fifty mages out there. What were three girls supposed to do against that?!
"Don't worry, Lu-chan. Er-chan will leave some for us!" Unused to people that didn't want to fight at the drop of a hat, Levy misunderstood her newest friend's hesitation. She grabbed the blonde's wrist and pulled her out to catch up with Erza just in time for her to stride through the door.
"EISENWALD!"
The dark mages' attention was pulled away from harassing the "flies" at the shout. Seeing the three women exit the train to stand across from their entire guild, they started chuckling again.
"Hey, it's that armored girl from the bar," a tall mage with three whiskers on each cheek and his black hair sticking up in a tuff noted.
"She must have overheard our plans," said his fat, green-haired companion with oversized lips and no nose.
"So it's your fault that our plans are being interrupted," the shirtless man said with a sharp glare that made them both freeze in fear. "I'll deal with you later."
"Erigor, I assume," Erza said while pointing her sword at the dark guild.
The man lazily floated into the air and spun so that he was upside down. "And if I am?" he asked with a psychotic grin.
Two pieces of wood clattered onto the platform. The dark guild collectively inhaled sharply at the ruined flute laying between the mages. "Then this is for you."
Erigor's eyes bulged out as his face flushed red with rage. His body shook as he failed to put his rage into words. Half-formed syllables and choking sounds were all that was able to escape his mouth.
"It suffered some damage during transit."
Erza's comment snapped the dark mage out of his stupor, and he magically propelled himself at her with a wordless cry of rage. His scythe clashed against Erza's sword and began to hum with Wind Magic as he tried to decapitate the source of his wrath. "I WILL KILL YOU!"
"No."
Erza broke the blade lock and lashed out with a kick that sent Erigor crashing into the ticket station. She looked back to Levy and said, "I'll take care of Erigor. Can you and Lucy handle the rest?"
"Sure!" Levy declared over Lucy's "No way!".
"I leave it to you then." Erza disappeared in a blur and reappeared over Erigor with a twohanded slash that the other mage had to desperately block with his scythe.
"Levy-chan, are you crazy?! We cannot beat all of these mages ourselves!" Lucy worriedly hissed at her friend. They were already recovering from the shock of watching their boss getting sent flying and turning their attention to the two girls in front of them.
"Sure we can, Lu-chan," Levy said with the confidence of someone reciting a fact from a book. "They're not that tough. We got this."
That said, Levy began to create words in front of her and elemental attacks went flying at the dark mages. They tried to dodge, but they were too grouped up and several took the full brunt of her magic. That galvanized the mages to charge forward, weapons appearing in their hands as magic was gathered in fists and sent flying.
Lucy let out a scream of fear and was forced to dodge to the side. "Dammit, Levy!" she cursed while pulling out a golden key shaped like an axe. "Open! Gate of the Golden Bull, Taurus!"
There was a golden glow and chime before her pursuers were sent flying by a large double-headed axe wielded by a humanoid black and white cow in a speedo and boots. The bell around his neck clanged as he snorted around the ring in his nose and took a defensive stance in front of Lucy. "No one touches Lucy's booooobs," he mooed.
"Dammit, Taurus," Lucy muttered. She hoped Erza was too busy fighting Erigor to notice how perverse her spirit was. This entire job was a chaotic mess, but she hoped to at least give off a good first impression of her skills. She stepped up next to her spirit and cracked her whip. "Taurus, everyone here is our enemy!
"Even the woman with the nice boobs?"
"Everyone except her," Lucy amended with a tired tone. Couldn't he have picked a different adjective for Erza?
"What about the woman with the tiny boobs?"
"Just… just attack all the men."
"Yoooouuuuu got it!"
The bull spirit let out a loud moo and slammed his axe into the ground, splitting the station and sending Eisenwald members flying. Taurus charged into the fray and began to cut down the mages armed with magic weapons in a display of superior weapon skills. Any mage that tried to attack him from afar or behind found themselves being cracked across the face or tripped up by Lucy's heart-tipped whip. Some tried to take out the blonde, but they quickly found themselves sent flying into unconsciousness as the spirit protected his summoner.
Despite the superior numbers, Lucy found that Levy was right: the Eisenwald mages really weren't that tough. Speaking of her friend, Lucy noticed that she wasn't throwing magic words around the station anymore. Momentarily distracted by Levy's missing presence, Lucy was almost struck by a black bolt of magic, but Taurus was able to block it with his axe. "Thank you, Taurus," Lucy exclaimed in relief.
"No problem, Lucy. Don't space out like that though."
The blonde nodded. She didn't have time to worry about Levy right now. Besides, Levy had been in Fairy Tail for years and Erza had originally wanted to bring her along as her only backup. She was sure that she would be fine.
Levy was handling her opponent fine.
Her thrashing of the dark guild had been interrupted by a cocky mage with a stripped hood and sharp features that had declared himself "the great Rayule" before attacking Levy—completely wasting the element of surprise. She had to admit, he was certainly stronger than the average guild member. The black bands on his fingers could extend and pull him along the various structures of the station, making him a very mobile opponent. He could also use them to quickly attack from strange angles, forcing her to use her Guard spell to block the attacks rather than dodging. She had tried that at first, but he had just bent the attack and struck her with surprising force. While she felt bad at leaving the rest of the guild to Lucy, Levy was glad that her friend wasn't facing Rayule. He could easily bypass her spirits and attack her directly, and unlike Levy, Lucy couldn't defend herself. One whip couldn't defend against ten.
"LUCY KICK!"
"Agh! My dick!"
And it certainly didn't seem like Lucy was having any trouble.
Rayule was yelling something again. Levy had tuned him out a while ago, but he was yelling "flies" enough that it made its way through. It was probably the name of one of his spells, though she didn't know why he'd name them that. Flies didn't have much to do with black bands unless it was supposed to be some play on flypaper.
Struck with an idea, Levy wrote Stick into the air instead of her normal Guard and grinned when Rayule's bands hit them and stopped.
"Dammit. What's this?" he demanded while struggling to free his magic.
"It's my Stick spell. Can't you read?" Levy cheekily asked. She clasped her hands behind her back and ducked under the floating word. She began to whistle a jaunty tune and stalk towards to the trapped mage.
Panicking at the cheeriness and nonchalance she was showing, Rayule began to struggle harder. "Stay back, you damn fly!" When Levy just started to whistle louder and skip he got pissed off. "If that's how you want to play it then take this!" Rayule jumped and angled his legs at Levy before shortening his magic to send a flying kick at the petite mage.
Levy just ducked out of the way and let Rayule go roaring past her. He tried to stop reeling himself in only for his momentum to carry him forward and slam his hands into Stick. Levy skipped back to where Rayule was now stuck even worse than before and asked, "How'd that work, oh great Rayule?"
"I hate you so much, you cu-"
Rayule was cut off by a Silence slapped over his mouth. All he could do was glare daggers at Levy as she stood on her tiptoes and wrote something above his head. "Night-night," she said while pulling down an eyelid and sticking out her tongue.
Then Iron dropped on Rayule's head and he fell unconscious.
Levy admired her work for a moment and gave a satisfied nod. The Stick spell had turned out quite well. She'd have to remember it in the future. But for now she threw Fire with both hands and joined Lucy in cleaning up the rest of Eisenwald.
Erigor's scythe spun like a pinwheel in his hands as he desperately parried Erza's sword. The Fairy Tail mage's swordplay was ridiculous. If he lost concentration for even a second she'd make him pay for it. He hadn't been ready for such a fierce opening at first and had nearly been stabbed in the face—ending the fight before it even got started. The sharp pain in his ear from where she had sliced it in half was a constant reminder that he had to bring his A-game.
With a blast of Wind Magic from his scythe that forced Erza back, Erigor gained some room to work with. He floated out of Erza's reach and glared down at her. "You damned fly. How dare you ruin months of planning!" Did she understand how long it had taken to discover where Lullaby had been hidden? They had almost missed their window of opportunity. If Kageyama hadn't known how to dispel the seal keeping Lullaby locked away all their time and effort spent finding Lullaby would have been wasted.
Speaking of Kageyama, Erigor would need to kill him after he killed this annoying fly. The man had been incompetent enough to not only get caught, but he had also let the Lullaby be destroyed when they were just about to have their revenge!
"How dare youtry to use a Death Magic like Lullaby!" Erza shot back. "How many people were you planning on killing with that horrid flute?"
Erigor's mouth twisted into a sneer. She had destroyed Lullaby without even knowing what his plan was? Just because it was "Black Magic?" These Fairy Tail flies were truly the worst. "It's not a matter of how many—though it certainly would have taken a lot before people learned not to test us—but who we killed first."
"Who were you trying to kill here?" Erza demanded.
Erigor tsked his tongue in disappointment. "Come now, Scarlet Knight, I thought you were supposed to be smart. The only fly worth killing here is you." Saying so, Erigor made several quick movements with his left hand and thrust it at Erza. "Storm Bringer." A large tornado was summoned forth and its howling deafened everyone inside of the train station. The winds whipped debris and unconscious mages around as it rushed Erza.
The red-haired mage summoned forth a large club made of rocks with a glowing eye in the middle of the head and smashed it into the approaching tornado. The two forces fought each other for dominance, but Erza's strength proved greater. The tornado was countered and thrown back at Erigor, but he had long since moved. Erza dropped her club and summoned her sword back to her hand in time to spin around and block Erigor's scythe from slitting her throat from behind.
Unwilling to face Erza in a test of strength that he would surely lose, Erigor disengaged and flew out of reach. "Impressive. To tell you the truth, I had always wanted to fight you at least once. And now that you've destroyed my Lullaby this seems like the perfect opportunity."
Erza didn't care what Erigor wanted. She just wanted an answer. Several knives requipped in her hands. "Tell me what you were planning, Erigor!" she demanded while hurling the blades at the assassin.
Erigor deflected the knives with contemptuous ease. He didn't even need magic to defend against such a pathetic attack. As usual, he was untouchable in the air. "Tell me, fly, where does this track end?"
Erza's eyes narrowed in frustration, but she played along, "Clover Town."
"And what is currently occurring in Clover Town?"
"The Guild Master's Meeting!?" she exclaimed in shock, eyes wide with horror. "You were planning to kill the guild masters?"
"Yes! Those bastards that closed our guild and relegated us all into outcasts deserve to die!" The wind picked up around Erigor as he raised his hand to attack Erza with another tornado. "And you just had to ruin it."
Erza's head had dipped down as her arms shook from suppressed rage. As the Wind Magic rushed towards her again, her scarlet hair was blown back to reveal her face twisted into an even greater rage than Erigor's. She flexed her hand and summoned her club back into her hand with her Telekinesis and swung it one-handed to destroy the tornado.
Erigor was shocked at the casual display of strength compared to her earlier struggle but didn't let that show on his face. "Looks like you've—!" His taunt was interrupted by a cry of shock and agony as his back, legs, and arms exploded with pain. He stared at the knives he had deflected sticking out of his limbs in disbelief. He turned back to stare at Erza only to find her leaping off of the air itself and heading right for him with her sword drawn again. He tried to swipe at her with his scythe, but she was too quick and jumped over it. Now above him, Erza reached out for the club she had thrown to the ceiling while Erigor was distracted and brought it rocketing back down to her hands and smashed it into Erigor with gravity's assistance.
The dark mage slammed into the station floor with a resounding crash. All of the combatants stopped fighting to stare in disbelief at what had just happened. Erza slowly used Geppo to slow her descent as she dismissed everything but her sword. She landed without a sound and walked over to the edge of the crater that Erigor's body had created. "You still conscious, Shinigami?"
The dust was cleared with a burst of Wind Magic and Erigor stood up. He was surrounded by swirling winds that filled the station with a dull roar as it rapidly rotated around him. "If I hadn't used my Storm Mail that would have killed me. I thought you official guilds weren't supposed to kill anyone?" he mocked over the wind's roar.
Erza brushed the hair that Erigor was blowing into her face over her shoulder. "There's no rule against killing dark mages—just taking assassination jobs. Something I would think you of all people would have known," she replied. "Besides if I hadn't seen you activate your Storm Mail I wouldn't have hit you as hard."
"Bullshit!" Erigor declared before taking a moment to calm himself. "It doesn't matter. Now that I've activated my Storm Mail it's over for you flies." He flew to up to the opposite side of the crater and held out two fingers of each hand before crossing them in front of his chest. "Goodbye, Scarlet Knight! Emera Baram!" Thousands of wind blades were launched from Erigor's hands. They sliced into everything in their paths. The train station, tracks, train, and even the wall opposite of Erigor were sliced into ribbons and destroyed by his most destructive magic. Once he had finished casting it, Erigor let out a loud laugh in triumph. "Good riddance!"
But when the dust cleared Erigor's laugh died in his throat as Erza stood in front of him with her arms crossed to protect her face and no worse for wear. "Tekkai," she intoned before dropping her arms. Shocked by his ultimate attack failing, Erigor began to desperately send blasts of wind at Erza with waves of his arm. She was undeterred by the attacks and just casually deflected them with her sword. Erza then disappeared in a burst of Soru and reappeared within reach of Erigor. With a single stroke she cut through his Storm Mail and struck Erigor himself. He could only stare at her with eyes wide and mouth agape before his strength left him and he fell back unconscious.
Erza lifted his scythe to her hand and began to give it some practice swings. It was actually a nice weapon. Balance was good; blade was in decent shape; allowed the wielder to cast Wind Magic from the blade. Honestly, if it wasn't for the gaudy skull at its head Erza thought it would pair well with her Sky Empress Armor. A shame it didn't match. Sky blue with white accents just didn't mesh well with dark, gnarled wood. She'd just stick to her Wind Daggers.
"Ooh. Did you get a new toy, Er-chan?" Levy asked. The few members of Eisenwald that hadn't been defeated by the time Erza finished with Erigor had immediately surrendered with their leader's defeat. Levy had made some rope and left Lucy to tie them up, finally able to pull seniority on someone to get out of cleanup. Jet and Droy always turned it into a competition between themselves and she couldn't exactly pull seniority on her older sister. Erza would just use her Telekinesis to get it all done at once anyways, which would take all the fun out of it.
"My weapons aren't toys, Levy," she replied out of habit. "But, yes, I think I'll keep this one. I just need to find something to go with it. Perhaps a ragged black cloak and a skull mask?"
Levy stuck out her tongue. "Blegh. That's so cliché. You've got to have something better. What about that black dress with all the frills?"
"Maybe. I'm not sure it would match that well though."
"You could try polishing the wood? Make it nice and shiny so that it doesn't look like you got it by cutting the limb off a hanging tree."
Lucy had walked over in time to hear the end of Levy's suggestion. "Oh gods. Why are you guys talking about hanging trees?" she asked. Erza held up her new scythe and Lucy made a face at it. "Ew. That thing is definitely creepy enough to come from a hanging tree." She looked down at the unconscious Erigor. "Creepy scythe for a creepy guy."
Erza stashed her newest weapon in her requip space and walked to put a hand on Lucy's shoulder and gave the mage a small smile. "You did a good job against Eisenwald. I can see why Levy-chan wanted to bring you along."
Lucy awkwardly squirmed at the compliment. "Well, Taurus is a Golden Celestial Spirit, so he is rather powerful."
"Yes, but you were quite skilled as well. I saw how well you were using that whip of yours. It was impressive." Erza herself was merely passable with a whip. She'd struggle to pull off some of those grabs and hits that Lucy had made look easy. "I'd appreciate if you'd join me for training sometime and give me some pointers."
Lucy's smile split her face in half. "I would love to!"
Levy sidled up behind Lucy and jumped to hook her arm around the taller woman's neck. "Lu-chan's not just good with a whip! She also wants to join our book club!"
Erza's smile grew wider. "Even better. We can practice before the meeting."
As the trio began to walk away and make plans, Lucy jerked to a stop when she realized something. "Wait! What are we going to do about them?" she asked while gesturing to the Eisenwald guild.
Levy waved off her concerns. "With all those people that they scared off the Rune Knights are already on their way. Let them earn their paychecks."
Erza nodded in agreement. "Yes. In fact, if we hurry we can make it back to Magnolia Town in time for you two to take that job you were planning on doing."
Levy blanched at the suggestion. The train station was trashed and would be delayed for some time so there was only one way Erza could be thinking of on how to get back and it was a horrible idea. She opened her mouth to shut it down, but Lucy (poor, clueless, Lucy) spoke first.
"How will we do that?"
"We can take a magic four-wheeler!" Erza cheerily suggested with a look in her eye that Levy knew meant trouble.
"Oh! I hvae never ridden in one of those before!"
"Then this is the perfect opportunity!" Erza declared, subtly shooting a victorious grin at Levy. She knew that her little sister hated her driving. But she didn't exactly have any room to talk with how bad she was behind the wheel. Master drove faster than her! "If you like it I can give you driving lessons."
"That would be amazing!" Lucy said, unable to see Levy's pale face, rapid head shaking, and mouthed "NO!" She always wanted to try driving, but her father had insisted that Heartfilias didn't drive and if she really wanted to go somewhere he'd hire a chauffeur.
Overruled without even needing a vote, Levy followed her friends to the four-wheeler rental with a resigned slump to her shoulders. At least they'd be getting back home quickly…
…she'd cast a few extra Seat Belts just to be safe.
Kuzan woke to an annoying slight of daylight positioned directly over his left eye. He closed it tighter and tried to ignore the light, but it was too persistent. He could feel a familiar pair of arms around him and tried to slowly shift out of them to keep from disturbing his bedmate, but as they squeezed him tighter and pressed two squishy mounds into his back he knew that he had failed. "Morning."
"Good afternoon, sleepyhead," Ur answered.
"Hrm. It's still early. A few more hours then."
"Hilarious," Ur drily told him while lightly smacking his shoulder, forcing a chuckle out of Kuzan. "You're not still tired from last night, are you?" she teased. "You're getting old."
He rolled over so that he was facing her and stole a quick kiss. The years had been quite kind to Ur, only giving her beautiful face a few more lines and sparing her the grays that had claimed most of Kuzan's own hair. "I'm not that old yet."
Ur gave him a sultry smile and began to slowly run her foot up his leg. "Would you care to prove that? Or are you too worried about what the kids have gotten up to?" she challenged.
Kuzan leaned in for a deeper kiss. "They're adults. I think they can handle themselves." Even with his eyes closed Kuzan knew that Ur was giving him a disbelieving look. "And they haven't shown up in the papers," he admitted.
Ur's arms reached up to drape over his shoulders and pull him closer. "Then what are you waiting for?"
They may not have left the bed, but the lovers certainly didn't get any more sleep.
"You know that we do have to end this vacation at some point?"
"Later."
Omake: Driving Lessons
"'Morning," Kuzan mumbled as he sat down at his usual table with a steaming mug of coffee that was both too small and too weak for his tastes. He ignored Ur's response of "it's noon" and blindly grabbed at the paper folded in front of him. It was Sunday, he was supposed to be sleeping in, but Levy had woken him up with a message from his (girlfriend? lover? significant other? None of those seemed like the right way to describe their relationship) saying that there was something that they needed to talk about, so here he was.
"Have I ever told you that it's weird that you can walk around with that sleeping mask on and not bump into anything?" Ur asked. "Because it's really weird. Especially when you do it while the girls and boys are fighting. No defense, no contact, and not a drop of coffee spilled."
"Hmm," Kuzan grunted as he finished his coffee. "Did you just wake me up early to gawk at my amazing sensing skillsor did you actually want to talk about something? Because I've still got the mask on and can go right back to bed right here."
"Well if you'd take that mask off you'd see what I wanted to show you on the paper you're pretending to read."
Kuzan raised a hidden eyebrow at Ur and very maturely decided to let her have this one before pushing his mask up and reading the front page. His expression didn't change, and he set the paper down. "'Magic Four-Wheelers become commercially available'," he quoted the article's title around a yawn. "That's what you woke me up early for?"
"I figured that since these things will start being available the kids should learn how to drive," Ur explained.
Kuzan nodded in agreement. "Makes sense. Why do you need me?"
"I can't drive."
"Neither can I," Kuzan replied with a shrug. Four-Wheelers were just Turtle Cars that ran on magic instead of gas and there weren't a lot of Turtle Cars back in his old world. With how limited land was in the Blues and Grand Line, they weren't that useful to the vast majority of the population. Only the rich could afford them and you didn't make that kind of money on a Marine's salary—even an Admiral's. "Why would you think I can drive? I bike everywhere."
"Aren't you like sixty? Shouldn't you be looking into buying one of these for your midlife crisis?"
"No," Kuzan said with a face that showed he was not amused with Ur's cheeky answer or grin. "I'm pretty sure that I went with the new hot young girlfriend option."
"Ooh. Good answer," Ur laughed off the compliment, but he caught the sparkle in her eyes that he knew meant she appreciated it.
"And, for the record, I'm fifty-five," Kuzan reminded her while running his hand through his mostly gray hair. How had Sengoku managed to keep his hair a solid black into his seventies? He put up with Garp and he had gray hair. It had to be the kids. Garp had his family; his son Dragon, the most wanted man in the world; his adopted grandson Ace, the son of Gold Roger and a commander under Whitebeard; and his biological grandson Luffy, the most notorious pirate of the Eleven Supernovas, which was an accomplishment itself seeing how notorious that group already was. Sengoku was childless and just had to run the world's entire united military. No wonder he didn't have gray hair. As if he needed any more proof, Kuzan distinctly remembered that his hair hadn't started graying until he started taking care of Erza and adding Levy into the mix had only accelerated the process.
"Well if you don't know how to drive and I don't know how to drive, who the hell is going to teach the kids?"
The pair were stumped for several minutes before Kuzan said, "What about Makarov?"
"He might. Can't hurt to ask."
When they asked, Makarov confirmed that he knew how to drive and was more than willing to teach the kids, with the exception of Natsu, who turned green at the idea of getting into a car. They would soon come to regret their decisions because neither of them bothered to check how well Makarov could drive.
The kids had drawn lots and Mira was the winner, so to speak. The four-wheeler that Makarov had rented for the day was a simple two-person vehicle that was relatively low to the ground and came with an enclosed cabin. Mira approached the vehicle but couldn't find her instructor anywhere. "Gramps?" she hesitantly called out. Was he running late?
"In the four-wheeler, Mira-chan," the old man's voice said, but a quick glance inside the cabin didn't reveal the source. It was only when Mira was leaning on the hood of the four-wheeler did she see the tufts of Makarov's thinning hairline over the dash. "I know, the seats are a little low to the ground, but it'll be fine," his (mostly) disembodied voice assured her. She heard the sound of something tapping leather and assumed that Makarov was patting the driver's seat. "Now let's get the lesson started. The other kids are quite eager for their turns too."
"Yes, sir!" Mira eagerly answered and quickly took her place behind the wheel. She fastened her seatbelt and strapped the SE Plug on her arm.
Makarov showed her the pedals, handbrake, and had her move the wheel back and forth to get used to how much force she'd have to put into a turn before her begin. "Now just start pumping magic into the plug and off we go."
"Like this?" Mira asked as she concentrated on sending her magic into the plug. The car began to slowly move forward, and Mira carefully pulled in front of the Fairy Tail guild where the other teens watched them head into town in fascination and envy.
"Good job, Mira-chan!" Makarov praised. "Now that you're on the road you can really open her up."
An eager grin stretched across Mira's face before she forced magic into the plug and made the tires squeal as they spun in place before gaining traction and the four-wheeler tore off into Magnolia Town. Mira and Makarov were slammed back into their seats and Mira kept a death grip on the wheel while she tried to keep it straight, but every time she thought she had fixed it, the four-wheeler would jerk the opposite way.
"You don't have to cut the wheel that much, Mira-chan. Just a slight adjustment is enough. The faster you're going the less you have to turn the wheel to make it go the direction you want it to," Makarov calmly explained from below the dash.
Mira listened to his advice and managed to get the four-wheeler under control. She breathed a sigh of relief but then tensed right back up when she saw the rapidly approaching T-intersection. "Hey Gramps, how do I turn?"
"Turns are easy. Just cut the wheel as you approach, pull the handbrake, then cut back to straighten her out and you're good. And make sure you put the handbrake back down before you stop moving sideways."
Mira grinned as she spun the wheel one-handed and yanked on the handbrake with the other. The tires squealed again, and Mira could see the skid marks left behind out of the corner of her eye as she forced the four-wheeler to make a hard turn. It fished-tailed a little and she winced when she felt the rear collide with something and heard the sound of breaking wood. "My cabbages!" someone shouted from behind her as she sped off from the scene of the crime.
She looked down at Makarov with a nervous grin, but the old man just waved off her concerns. "Don't worry about it, these things happen all the time."
"Destroying food carts?"
"Yes. You'd be surprised how many produce merchants there are in Fiore and how flimsy their carts are. They're practically designed to be destroyed." Makarov said with a sagely nod. "Now keep your eyes on the road. You wouldn't want to hit anything important."
"Yes, sir!" Mira said with a laugh as she poured more magic into the plug and sent them back into their seats again.
And so, the lessons on how to drive from an old man who couldn't see the road continued.
"Uh, Gramps? This is a dead-end."
"You'll just have to go over, Gray-kun."
"Okay," the black-haired mage said with a shrug. He froze the wheel in place and leaned most of his body out of the window so he could touch the street. "Ice-Make: Ramp!" The four-wheeler hit the ice and barely cleared the building. Gray managed to pull himself back inside just in time for the four-wheeler to hit the ground. He glanced at the steering wheel and leaned back in his seat. He didn't need to turn yet, so it was fine.
Makarov didn't agree. He smacked Gray's head and said, "Both hands on the wheel at ten and three at all times. We're safe drivers here at Fairy Tail."
Levy checked her mirrors and carefully backed up between the two garbage cans before cutting the wheel and pulling forward to finish parallel parking the four-wheeler. She nervously glanced to where Makarov was watching her outside of the vehicle and let out a sigh of relief when he told her, "Good job," with a thumbs up.
The four-wheeler's tires squealed as it spun out of control while Erza fought with the wheel to make it do what she wanted. She could see the smoke from where she had been and saw a glimpse of her target every two seconds. With a cry of exertion, she yanked back on the handbrake and twisted the wheel to her left, forcing the car to stop spinning. It continued to slide sideways for several more feet and then hit the curb. The vehicle listed dangerously on its side and nearly tipped over, but she requipped a large hammer into her left hand and the extra weight saved her. Erza leaned her forehead against the steering wheel without releasing it from the death grip that had bent the top half of the steering wheel backwards. After taking a nervous breath, she checked in front and behind her and gave a small fist pump when she saw that she had managed to successfully park the four-wheeler between the two trashcans.
She turned to Makarov and he told her "Good job," with a thumbs up.
Elfman desperately cut the wheel while simultaneously hunching over it so he could fit in the cabin. He was trying to take a left turn in a four-way and was rapidly approaching the opposing street where an old lady shorter than Makarov with a walker was in the middle of crossing it.
"You want this left," Makarov unhelpfully reminded him.
"I know!" Elfman shouted back. He roared out in exertion before smashing his fist through the driver's side window, leaning most of the way out of it (which was the most comfortable he'd been since he crammed himself into the damn four-wheeler), and slammed his Stone Bull arm into the street to slow his momentum. He carved a ditch in the road, but successfully turned the vehicle and avoided hitting anyone.
"Pull your arm back inside, Elfman," Makarov ordered. "If you run into something it'll be torn right off."
The large teen sighed in defeat. "Can I at least keep my head outside?"
"No. But next time remind me to get an open cabin. You don't fit and I can't see a damn thing."
The four-wheeler wobbled unsteadily on the large vine it was driving on. In the driver's seat, Droy kept desperately throwing seeds in front of the four-wheeler out of the broken window so that they wouldn't run out of road—er, vine, and plummet to their deaths. He didn't know what to do. Things had escalated so quickly! One minute he was driving down the street and about to take out a runaway baby carriage, the next he had thrown down a supercharged beanstalk seed and was driving up in the clouds! This was ridiculous!
"I was going to go over off-roading next lesson, but it seems that you're eager to jump ahead, Droy-kun," Makarov commented from his seat, either completely unaware or unaffected by the predicament they found themselves in. Droy couldn't tell, he was too busy working on not falling to their deaths to ask.
Lisanna patiently waited at the stop sign with her turn signal on as the young couple crossed the street in front of them. Once the coast was clear, she looked both ways to double-check her surroundings before carefully pulling forward and driving further into town.
"Very good job, Lisanna-chan," Makarov praised the white-haired girl.
"Thank you, Gramps!"
"You know, your siblings had trouble with their turns and I was sure you would as well. Looks like you proved me wrong."
"Guess I'm just a natural," Lisanna jokingly said without taking her eyes off the road. It was important not to get distracted while driving. She gently accelerated now that they were out of the busier part of town but made sure not to go too fast. They were always safe drivers at Fairy Tail after all.
"Yahoo!" Jet crowed as he poured more of his magic into the four-wheeler. The engine whined in protest, but still went faster as Jet's Speed Magic flowed through its system. "Now this is what I'm talking about!" he yelled out the open window. They had left Magnolia Town miles back and he was thrilled to be driving out here on the open road like this. No restrictions! No distractions! No obstacles! Just a flat stretch of road and nothing but speed. Gods, this was even better than running.
Unfortunately for the sharp-toothed mage, all good things had to come to an end. "You're U-turn's in half a mile, Jet-kun. You're going to want to start twisting the wheel now or you'll miss it," Makarov informed him from behind a large map and several inches deeper in the back of his seat than he thought possible on this model.
Jet groaned his disappointment even as he reached for the handbrake. If he did it right, he'd be able to keep most of his speed as he started to make his way back to Magnolia Town.
Kuzan and Ur stared in horror at the condition the four-wheeler was in when Makarov finished his lessons. The tires were bald, the front band back bumpers were dented and mangled, and there were what looked like leaves of lettuce stuck in the bumper. The driver's window was missing and presumably destroyed based on the shards that hadn't been removed, and the body had to be covered in more dents and scratches than Natsu after a fight against Erza.
"So… how did the kids do?" Ur asked after finding her voice. It was clear by the condition of the car before them that the lessons had gone terribly. The only question was how terribly and who had caused the most damage.
"The kids did great," Makarov told them, surprising the pair. "No problems at all with their driving, they're all naturals; especially Lisanna and Levy." The old man began to walk back to the car. "Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to go return this thing to the rental place and get my security deposit back. I'll be gone for a while so Ur, you're in charge until I get back."
"Kuzan? Do you think that it might have been a mistake to let Master teach the kids how to drive?"
They watched as Makarov hopped in the car—that he still couldn't see out of, especially with the bent steering wheel in the way—and immediately pulled out like a racer leaving a pitstop. The four-wheeler went from zero to at least seventy in four seconds before his giant hand stretched through the window and grabbed a lamppost at the end of the street to use it to help him turn two-hundred-and-seventy degrees to the left and take the right turn back to the rental store.
The two watched this happen with their mouths hanging open before looking back at the kids. Makarov had approved of their driving. Especially Lisanna's and Levy's?! Kuzan swallowed thickly before answering Ur's question.
"Yes. Yes, it was."
A/N: Chiropractor, doctor, specialist, canceled surgery, surgery, recovery, other surgery, recovery, physical therapy, ER for a different reason, new specialist, medical procedure. 2021 was shit. I'm healthy now though. Thanks for sticking around guys. Later.