"Mom?" Kurt whispered.
Next to him, Sebastian nearly forgot how to breathe. What the hell?!
It couldn't really be Kurt's mom – she was dead, wasn't she? Though this woman did sound an awful lot like Kurt…
"No, Beth," Burt said from the other room, cutting her off in the middle of her sentence. "Not this time!"
Movement from Kurt's side of the bed brought Sebastian out of his stupor, and he began to panic as Kurt pulled away from him and started to stand up.
"Kurt, wait!" Sebastian whispered urgingly. They didn't know who was out there – and if Burt's tone was any indication, it was not someone he was happy to see.
Kurt went on as though he hadn't heard him.
Not knowing what else to do – and his own curiosity growing by the second – Sebastian threw back the covers and got up, meeting Kurt at the door just as he started to open it.
Kurt slowly, cautiously, crept out of the bedroom and into Sebastian's living room, and Sebastian followed suit.
There they found Burt standing by the front door and glaring daggers at a woman with dark brown hair who was fighting sobs and looking a little helpless.
"Do you have any idea, ANY IDEA what you put Kurt through?" Burt was saying. "What you put me through?"
The woman opened her mouth to answer, but whatever she was going to say was lost when she caught sight of the young couple slowly coming around to stand next to Burt.
The way Kurt's breath caught when they locked eyes on each other was all the confirmation Sebastian needed: this definitely was his mother.
"Kurt," she breathed, pushing past Burt to go to him.
"Mom," Kurt let out, crossing the distance between them. Elizabeth enclosed him in her arms, and even though he was taller than she was, he looked small in her embrace, pulling in his shoulders and pressing his face to her neck.
"Shh, it's okay," she whispered into his hair, one of her hands coming up to caress the back of his head. "I'm here."
Sebastian looked at them, not quite understanding, but Burt was softly shaking his head, looking determined.
"No. No. Get away from my son."
Elizabeth looked up, and something in his eyes made her pause. Her hands fell away from Kurt's shoulders.
Kurt looked up as well. Sebastian could tell he had tears in his eyes. Understanding and criticism had not entered into his mind yet- just the primal urge to be with the person who carried him as a child. He held on to her jacket with both hands. "Dad?" he asked uncertainly.
"You don't get to do this," Burt said, his voice rough with emotion. "You don't get to swoop in and take him. Not after you made me raise him by myself, made me sit through years of him singing goodnight lullabies to a picture frame, yearning for someone he barely remembered-"
"Burt-" Elizabeth started, but Burt shook his head.
"Three weeks ago," he shouted angrily, pointing his finger at her, and then at Kurt, "I had to talk my son down the railing of a cruise ship in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean because he thought he was responsible for his mom's death!"
Sebastian's eyes went wide, and his heart lurched in the same way it had the night Kurt had left him.
Kurt closed his eyes tightly, shaking his head softly in denial, suddenly reminding Sebastian incredibly of his father. Kurt swayed on his feet, and reached out blindly behind him. Sebastian immediately stepped up to take his hand. Kurt squeezed it gratefully. It was like he needed a tangible reminder of where he was, and Sebastian was tethering him to the moment.
"How dare you keep him in the dark and then show up here like you can un-do what you did-" Burt continued angrily.
"I didn't know!" Elizabeth screamed, her voice breaking. "I didn't know you were alive!"
"Our house went up two days after you faked your death a second time, Beth. Two whole days in which you could have contacted us-" Burt protested, but Elizabeth cut him off to explain.
"I didn't fake my death! That bomb was real and it was designed to kill me. I just survived."
That silenced Burt effectively, and slowly, Kurt's mother began to explain. "The blast wave from the explosion propelled me away from the car. I hit the wall of the parking lot and lost consciousness. They took me to a hospital and kept me in an artificial coma for days to determine if I had sustained internal injuries. By the time I woke up, word of your death was all over the news."
"But the Agency knew- " Burt protested.
"They didn't tell me," Elizabeth said, sounding desperate. "For your safety, they kept my survival a secret from you, and made me believe I had lost the both of you, too."
Tears were starting to roll down her face. "I had to mourn you in a locked hospital room with guards at the door, while strangers and politicians held a wake for my family." She was trembling now, pleading to be understood. "I came as soon as I heard the news that you were alive. Do you really think I would have stayed away if I had known?"
Burt shook his head silently, the fight leaving him. She had been in the same situation as they had. Helplessly, he opened his arms. Elizabeth stepped into his embrace. "I'm so sorry," Burt whispered. "Please forgive me."
"I only care about having you back," Elizabeth said. They hugged each other tightly, both overwhelmed by the contact they had missed for so long. "Nothing else matters."
"Can you really stay?" Burt asked, sounding choked up.
"I am never leaving you again," Elizabeth said passionately, and kissed her husband on the lips.
"Kurt?" Sebastian asked carefully. His fiancé was still standing rooted to the ground, watching his parents.
Slowly, Kurt shook his head. "I did this," he whispered.
Sebastian leaned in to hear him, cocking his head. "What do you mean?" he asked.
"I did this," Kurt repeated. "They were living in peace- apart, but safe- and it was me who ruined everything."
"But if she's alive-" Sebastian started to argue. The words froze in his throat as Kurt turned to face him, his eyes red-rimmed and fierce. He pulled his hand out of Sebastian's grip.
"What?" Kurt demanded. "It's all okay? It doesn't matter that we had to destroy our own house and everything in it? It doesn't matter that my mom thought her family was dead for weeks? That my dad thought his son had killed his wife?"
His voice rose with every word until he was shouting, hating himself for directing the anger he felt for himself to Sebastian, but being unable to stop it.
"How- how will that ever be okay again?"
Burt and Elizabeth broke apart, both looking at him in worry.
"Baby, no one is blaming you," Elizabeth started, but Kurt cut her off.
"Why the hell not?!" he shouted, gesticulating wildly. "I am! I made us lose everything . All of our pictures, our memories, our things, our home ? I ruined all of your lives. I was the cause of all this pain! Am I supposed to just act like that never happened and live happily ever after?"
Elizabeth stared incredulously at him, blinking slowly. Her eyes slowly moved to Sebastian, who was looking as helpless as she felt. "You think you ruined our lives?"
"I know I did!" Kurt exclaimed. "None of this would have happened if I hadn't called you that day, or if I had just noticed that damn monitoring app on my phone and thrown it away sooner! I forced Dad to drop everything and start over, I broke Sebastian's heart – I know I did, don't act like I didn't – and Mom–" he broke off, choking over his words as he addressed his mother. "How can you even stand to look at me, knowing I'm the reason you were hurt and almost killed?"
Sebastian winced. Hearing the man he loved speak so harshly against himself was physically painful, and he wished he knew what to say to make him stop.
"It's all my fault," Kurt continued. "And I—" his breathing became shaky as his anger started to dissolve into misery. But he pressed on, pushing his voice past the lump in his throat and trying to ignore the sting of tears in his eyes. "I am so sorry. I hate that I hurt all of you, and I hate that I'm so messed up right now that you all feel like you have to go easy on me. Please, just stop pretending it's all okay, and tell me what you're really thinking!"
An uneasy silence fell over the room as everyone just stared at Kurt, at a loss for words.
It was Elizabeth who recovered first, and she slowly approached her son, a look of determination in her eyes.
Sebastian felt anxiety rise inside himself and he took a step closer to Kurt's side. He did not expect Kurt's mother to hurt her only son, but she was a stranger to him, and he did not know how to interpret her intentions. Their eyes met, and Sebastian realised he knew the look in her eyes, having seen it in Kurt many times. Kurt, unaware of the similarities between himself and his mother, did not relax.
When she reached him, Elizabeth set her hands on his shoulders, fixing him with a stare that commanded his attention.
Sebastian saw Kurt repress a flinch and raise his chin, despite everything ready to take his mother's criticism.
"Kurt," she said, her tone soft, despite her solemn expression, "I know what it's like to feel like the whole world has fallen apart around you, and there's nothing you can do about it. Or worse, that you somehow caused it. But believe me when I say that this was not your fault ."
Kurt let out an exasperated breath, unable to find the words to argue. This was not what he had been bracing for- what he had demanded.
"Hey – listen to me," Elizabeth said, unwavering in her stance. "I mean it. You are not responsible for this. The Andersons are. Okay?"
Kurt didn't respond. He was so focused on holding himself together now that he couldn't speak.
Sebastian watched them both with bated breath, silently willing Elizabeth's words to get through to him.
"And you have to understand," Elizabeth continued, "this didn't just happen to us; it happened to you, too. Yes, I lost my family when I left, but you had to grow up without a mother. I was an adult when it happened. You were a child, and forcing you to go through that, to make you play pretend in front of the whole world and push that responsibility on you? It was the hardest and the worst thing I have ever done. And then, when you finally found your path in life, you had to leave the one you loved behind – trust me, no one understands how hard that is better than I do. It was not your fault."
Kurt shook his head. "I called you ," he argued. "I had promised dad that I never would unless there was something important, or if we were in danger. That I would never call for something trivial-"
"Believe me, Kurt, the news of your engagement was not trivial to me," Elizabeth assured him. "And having your phone bugged was a violation of your privacy. My family had no right to do that to you – and it was not your job to foresee every possible method in which someone might try to harm us, and make sure that they didn't. You don't control the actions of other people."
Kurt shifted uncomfortably as he considered this. Her words made sense, but he couldn't quite bring himself to accept them. His actions had still been the catalyst.
Elizabeth took a steadying breath as her eyes began to well up again. "Do you want to know what you are responsible for?" she asked in a voice tight with emotion.
Kurt hung his head, unable to hold her gaze any longer. Finally. There was something she was holding against him after all. Suddenly, he doubted if he could take it. He had thought that not being blamed for everything they'd been through was hard, but now that someone was about to speak frankly to him, he was terrified. He didn't think he could bear to hear his mother tell him just how badly he had screwed up.
"Saving my life," Elizabeth finished, much to Kurt's surprise, and he lifted his head to look at her again.
"But…th-that doesn't make any sense," he stammered, finding his voice at last. "I wasn't even there–"
Elizabeth shook her head. "I was walking to my car when you called me to warn me," she informed him. "I only stopped because you sounded so upset, and I couldn't go anywhere until I knew that you were okay. If you hadn't called me when you did, I would have already been inside it when it blew up. I wouldn't have had a chance."
Kurt's mouth fell open. He didn't know what to say. His mind refused to let him believe it, insisting that she must only be saying it to make him feel better, but the look in her eyes told a different story. She was telling the truth.
His eyes flicked to his father, who was looking at him with a look of proud determination and fierce love.
Kurt was caught in a whirlwind of emotions. In spite of his mother's revelation, he still felt like he didn't deserve his family's forgiveness; he still felt like they ought to be angry with him, to hold him responsible for all the pain he had caused. But they were refusing to add to his self-flagellation, and now that he had let his frustrations out, he found that his anger was fading, and all that was left was hurt and exhaustion. He was so weary of punishing himself.
As Kurt's resolve began to crumble, Elizabeth moved toward him to pull him into an embrace. He practically fell into his mother's arms, and broke into heavy sobs that shook his whole body.
"It's okay!" Elizabeth gasped, holding tightly to Kurt and looking both pained and a little triumphant as he allowed himself to be comforted at last. "It's okay, sweetheart. It wasn't your fault. You didn't do anything wrong. It's okay."
After a moment, Burt walked over to his family, and he wrapped his arms around both of them, making it into a group hug. Elizabeth closed her eyes and leaned into Burt's embrace, and he pressed a soft kiss against the side of her head, bringing a small smile to her face.
Suddenly feeling like he was intruding on a private family moment, Sebastian quietly took a step back, intent on slipping out of the room to give them their space.
As though reading his thoughts, Burt looked up, meeting Sebastian's gaze with one of his most compelling fatherly looks, and he gave a little jerk of his head, summoning him over.
Oh. Okay, then. Sebastian shuffled forward a little awkwardly, and let himself be ushered into the space between Kurt and his father.
He wound one arm around Kurt's back, and his heart fluttered when Kurt reacted to his presence by readjusting so he could rest his head against his shoulder. "Bas," Kurt breathed, curling his fingers into the folds of Sebastian's shirt. "Please forgive me."
Not even Kurt himself was sure what he was seeking forgiveness for- for his outburst, for shouting, for leaving , or for coming back but not being whole , or for everything all at once.
"I do," Sebastian said clearly. He could have argued that there was nothing to forgive, but he felt instinctively that was not what Kurt needed. He needed absolution, whether or not that was Sebastian's to give was not the point. "And I'll be here to help you forgive yourself, as well." He could feel the last tension bleed from Kurt's posture, as he leaned into the hug now, his mind finally giving him some kind of peace.
A hand on his shoulder made Sebastian look up. Kurt's mother was looking at him, softly smiling, and once again, Sebastian couldn't help but think how it felt like he had known her all this time. He swallowed the lump in his throat and offered her a smile. "Welcome home, mom."