Rin sat inside the temple, her body curled up tight like a ball. Her small body shaking like a leaf as tears spilled down her cheeks like a waterfall. Her eyes red and swollen, her throat sore from crying so hard. She wanted this to all go away, she wanted everything to stop, she wanted the pain and the sadness she felt to disperse. For things to go back to how they were before.
This wasn't fair, why was this happening. Why did her grandpa have to leave her like this? Why did he have to die? He had never done anything wrong, now she was all alone with nothing. Her heart ached, so full of sadness she thought she may never be able to smile again. The fact that she would never ever see him again, she couldn't make the tears stop. She knew he would want her to be brave, but she couldn't do it.
No matter how much she forced herself to smile, to hide her feelings so that she could make him proud. She felt nothing but weakness, nothing but the loneliness inside of her. She wanted to make herself smile and be the brave girl he wanted, to be strong and smile. But she couldn't do it. She couldn't make herself happy. No words, no gestures, no gifts or letters from the clan would make it any better. He was gone, and she couldn't get over that.
He would no longer tell her stories, he would no longer pat her head affectionately. No more presents of sweets to share over tea and no more cuddles. There was nobody left to take care of her, nobody to keep her safe, to feed her. To come home to anymore. He was the only family she had left in the world, the only loved one that remained in her life.
Her parents had died in battle when she was but 3 years old, they never found the bodies, so she didn't even have their had been forced to leave the village to fight against an opposing clan who had sought to harm villagers and force their child to marry into their clan. Nothing but their memories, leaving her an orphan. She never even got to say goodbye to them.
But their deaths had not gone in vain, due to the blackmail and forcefulness of the clan, they had been shamed and cut ties. Rin being put under protection and her Grandpa helping to rebuild the clan's strength while helping Rin recuperate. Just a year before their death, her mother had suffered a miscarriage causing her baby brother to be born a stillbirth. She had been so excited to be a big sister, helping her parents as best she could, to be a big girl.
Ready to help look after and teach her baby brother about the duties of protecting the temple. Then she would have someone to play with, but she never got to meet him. She had been as distraught as her parents had been. Now as the only remaining member of the Matsuoka clan, she bore the responsibility of guardian. She was all alone, she had nobody to protect her, everything would have to be carried out alone.
She felt sick, she felt dizzy and she was scared. She wasn't ready to protect the temple, she still had so much to learn. She wasn't of age, the ceremony was usually passed on by 16, that was 6 years away. She was only 10 years old, she was still a child. What the hell did she know about running a temple, she was nowhere near strong enough. God her head was spinning, and her chest felt tight.
"Grandpa come back. Don't leave, please don't go. I can't do this, I'm scared. I don't want to be alone Grandpa!" she sobbed resentfully. Was she being punished? Why did she have to endure this kind of cruel pain? Much to her unaware, someone had heard her crying. Her desperate pained sobs but was unable to see the owner of the heartbroken weeping. Due to the fact she was shrouded in darkness, but knew it was a girl.
Haru had been wondering around the grounds, having been told by his grandpa to go play after training. Allowing him to have a break so that he wouldn't wear himself out or make himself ill from overexertion. As he had heard someone crying he had become worried, had someone gotten lost at the temple. He couldn't ignore someone in need, so he had approached, but found nobody was there.
This was because Rin was hidden behind the door, so she could have privacy to cry so nobody would make fun of her. She wanted to be alone with her misery and grieve the loss of the last family member she had left. He took a deep breath "Why are you crying? Are you lost? Why are you hiding?" he asked curiously. His grandpa and himself would help take care of them, they had no reason to be scared.
He could hear from her tone that it was a girl around his age. He kept wondering what could have possibly made her cry in such a painful way. causing him to worry about what was hurting her. What inner turmoil was raging inside of her body and causing her such conflict, what sadness was eating away at her and causing those bitter tears?
Rin stiffened, she had always been taught to never be found by a human. Though humans told folklore of her kind, if she was ever to be found it would mean trouble. So, she had to hide from him until she came of age to protect herself. But she was angry and upset, so even if she had to hide she could always vent. "I hate it, I'm all alone. Grandpa is gone, mama is gone, papa is gone and even my baby brother. They're all dead and I have nothing. Nobody to protect me. I'm lonely!" she sobbed bitterly.
Though Tengu's were of the strongest demons, her age and lack of training left her weak. She could easily be overpowered and killed, tortured or even kidnapped. God knows what could happen to her now. She had refused to leave the temple because it felt like her home, going back to the village would be lonely and full of strangers. But this place carried her grandpa's essence and she didn't want to leave.
Haru was stunned by her words, she really had been through a lot. He then sat down outside the temple doors quietly, hoping to keep her company and help ease her pain. She had obviously been through a lot. "You're not alone, I live here. My Grandpa looks after me, but he's really old and I'm scared he will die soon too. My mama and papa are divorced so I don't get to see them much" he explained indifferently.
His grandpa had explained that his parents had fallen out because he wasn't like other kids. Though his father had no problem with his son's gift, the mother was angry at her child having weird powers. His mother had divorced him and abandoned her son. Disowning him as her child and remarried another man. His father heartbroken at the loss had left Haru with his father while he recovered.
However, decided to open a school for children like his son to help them with their own gifts. But sent his son letters and occasionally visited, but after his wife leaving him he was still fragile. Especially given Haru resembled her greatly. But he did love his son and he never failed to remind him that, spoiling his son with love whenever he saw him.
Rin was stunned by this, this boy. This stranger, he had suffered the same as she. However, despite knowing this she could still not stop the tears from flowing. But she never would have guessed he could possibly understand how she felt. Rin hesitated, though they were strangers. She knew this boy lived here, she had seen him about many times. But this was the first time she had ever spoken to him, even if she was hidden.
"W… will you stay beside me. You won't go away too?" she asked hesitantly. She wanted a friend, anyone. She could never speak to him in case he hated her, not until she was strong enough. Not until she could protect him and the temple. But somehow, this boy chased away her loneliness. He was kind, his blue orbs always filled with strength and passion.
Haru smiled, he didn't know why. Even though he did not know the owner of the voice he felt a connection to them. A desire to protect them from their sadness "I promise I'll stay beside you forever" he replied warmly. He just hoped that one day he got to meet them in person, as speaking to a voice all the time got lonely when you knew it belonged to someone.
Rin lay silently on the porch, tears streaming down her face in her sleep. It had been 6 years since that day, since she had lost everything and the worst day of her life. The day she became an orphan. The one person she had left who raised her and showed her kindness, gone forever. Never having been able to say goodbye or even learn fully what her duties meant. Something she had been forced to face alone.
"Oji-chan" she whispered hoarsely. Since that day she had been alone, taking on the responsibility of protecting the temple herself. Her innocence lost and her childhood ending in that moment. Days of hard training, meditation, studying and self-healing had taken place. She had been forced to return to the village briefly for her grandfather's funeral and wake but had to return back as the temple could not be left unattended.
Focusing her energy, her powers and her abilities. Learning all she could about herself and what she was capable of. Learning how to become the strongest she could be so her grandpa would be proud of her. Later becoming a strong beautiful young woman, capturing the hearts of many male Tengu and admiration from her fellow clan members. But her heart would forever belong to Haru, ever since she was young.
Haru was sweeping the yard, cleaning the grounds and restocking the shop goods. Today was a quiet day due to it being a bank holiday so there was not much for him to do. But it would allow him to take it easy. However, he would not rest and indulge in comfort and guilty pleasures until everything was in place and tended to. He was no slacker after all.
Rin was resting on the porch due to boredom and a lack of anything to do. He had a right mind to scold her for being so lazy. Given she lived here, she could at least help out every now and again. He sighed heavily, approaching her with an annoyed expression "Oi Rin. Quit sleeping already" he scolded. Honestly, were all Tengu like this? He had heard they were powerful demons yet the only form of power he had seen was her own that she transferred to him via lip contact.
However, as he approached his expression changed to one of surprise and tenderness. He had seen Rin do a lot of things while here. Tease him, get annoyed, jealous, stubborn and shy. But he had never seen her cry before. Was she having a nightmare, was she sulking? Was she upset? He had never seen Rin look so vulnerable before, from day one she had shown her confidence and pride as a woman. Showing her affections for him proudly.
He knelt down towards her, shrugging her gently to wake her from her dreams. She rarely talked about herself, so god knows what kind of dreams she was having or what thoughts and feelings she repressed. "Rin wake up" he replied sternly but his voice was tender. She was safe, whatever she was dreaming about couldn't hurt her. It wasn't real, any of it.
"I don't want to be alone" Rin replied weakly her tone filled with sadness. She didn't want anyone else to leave her, she wouldn't be able to stand such a loss again. Those words caught Haru off guard, never having expected such words to come from Rin. Yet why did they sound so familiar. He swore he had heard such words from someone before, a long time ago.
He then sat down beside Rin on the porch, work could wait. He didn't want to leave Rin alone like this. He couldn't leave her locked inside the painful dreams she was having, that just would not be right. He reached out a hand slowly and stroked her hair affectionately. Hoping to soothe her sadness, whatever memories she was reliving in her dreams. Hoping to chase away whatever she was being forced to remember.
Rin opened her eyes wearily, her head drowsy from sleep and crying. She hadn't had that dream in a very long time. Since his death, Rin had repressed her memories as they became too painful. She remembered him fondly but being so young his loss had impacted her deeply. Having nobody left, the realization of loneliness had broken her. True fear and sadness having hit her.
She had been forced to stay the village until she was 15, due to the fact she was too young to protect it alone. Wards and barriers were placed around it to keep it safe and of course Haru's family guarded it. When she was 16, she was finally able to return to Haru's side and protect the temple as her grandpa wished for her. However, with a guardian she had been allowed to visit him every now and again.
Though a few close friends and guardians had known about Rin's feelings for Haru, they had been kept secret. Though her love had been supported due to how her Grandpa had encouraged the relationship. Many worried about people using him to hurt Rin or use him as a tool against her. So, as well as being trained as a guardian of the temple and the Matriarch of her family. She had also been bridal trained in secret.
She gripped her throat lightly, she was thirsty. She needed refreshment after crying, she only hoped her eyes weren't noticeably red after that. It would be too awkward to have to explain. When she was young, many other children had teased her for being a crybaby, something she had later started to hide out of fear and shame of being teased.
"Are you feeling better?" a familiar voiced asked in a concerned manner. He had left to make some tea then get back to patrolling the grounds. But upon seeing her wake up, he felt it best to check up on her. Whenever he had a bad dream, his Grandpa would comfort him then make some hot milk to help ease his troubles and help him get back to sleep.
Rin looked up to see Haru standing nearby, holding a tray of beverages. She smiled fondly, he was still as caring as he had been when he was a child. Though he wasn't as easy to show it was he was as a child. "Mm, a bit thirsty though" she admitted shyly. She had developed a habit of hiding her weakness so that nobody could use it against her. Yet she was able to show that side of herself freely to Haru.
Haru softened then approached with the tray, handing her some freshly made tea. I was supposed to help calm the nerves and hydrate you after having exhausted yourself. And Rin looked like she needed it. Though, he had not expected her to cry so hard, he could see the red marks under her eyes from the tears. It must have been a scary dream indeed.
She nodded gratefully taking the tea from him, feeling a little bad for making him worry. "Arigato Haru" she replied kindly. She sipped the tea, sighing under her breath. She felt refreshed and livelier, rousing her sleepiness and easing her sore throat. Feeling calmer than her previously stressed and emotional state earlier, feeling herself returning to normal somewhat.
Haru gazed at her with concern, not quite reassured of her well-being. She could hide it all she wanted, but he knew she was still affected by the dream. He wanted to know what had upset her so deeply. He couldn't force Rin to tell him, he knew that much. But he wished she trusted him enough to open her heart to him. This was her home too wasn't it? She had protected the temple all these years.
He sighed wearily under his breath "I can't force you to tell me, but dismissing your feelings is not good for your well-being. Talking about it helps relieve the mind and body of burden" he replied reassuringly. His grandpa had always explained things to him when he didn't understand or even coaxed him to talk about his feelings. Though it had taken much time and patience.
Rin blushed, where the hell had that wisdom come from? He was usually so bossy, yet every now and again he showed profound knowledge and kindness. It was like he was two different people. She then shifted, the dream was still strong in her mind. She felt lonely and it wasn't often that she showed weakness like this. But it was Haru, she had known him nearly all of her life after all.
"When I was little, my grandpa died leaving me alone. I had no other family members, so I was raised by the servants due the rule at the village of leaving someone so young unattended with adult protection" Rin explained. She had never felt lonelier in her life, feeling as though they never truly cared about her. Only looking after her out of duty because of her role as the sole Matsuoka heir and matriarch.
But her visits to see Haruka away from her studies were the highlight of her life. Being able to get away from the village and see him again. Her love continuing to blossom despite the hardships she faced. When old enough she was able to return to the temple fully and be by his side. Watching over him until they could meet in person and she could tell him how she felt. How much he meant to her.
Haru was stunned, he never knew she suffered such hardships. She was a very strong person to have dealt with all of that and protect a temple at the same time. She really should take pride in that. He placed a hand on her shoulder supportively "Gomen'nasai, I've been very harsh towards you. I apologize" he replied empathetically. He had no idea she carried such strong burdens on her shoulders.
She had protected this temple all her life and faced many hardships, having to deny her own personal problems for her duties. Something he could greatly relate to, as after losing his grandpa he became the guardian of the temple. It was a burden to bear but one he also carried with pride, knowing his grandfathers teachings would not have been in vain.
Rin softened, a small smile appearing on her face "Not really. You were the person who gave me the strength to keep going. Even as a child you told me words I never knew I needed" she explained shyly. Though she had crushed on him from afar as a child, that interaction had confirmed her feelings for him. A love that had blossomed from adolescence into adulthood, her first and only love.
Haru looked confused, they had known each other since they were young? But how could that be? He never recalled having ever met Rin when she was young, the day she appeared before him was a first for him. Sure, Makoto would occasionally visit to play or give him medicine, but he never recalled ever seeing any other girls at the temple.
Rin sighed, of course he wouldn't remember. He had been very young after all, he hadn't even seen her face. How the hell was he to know that she had been the one crying all those years ago. "One day, I was hiding in the temple after he died. I was so upset I couldn't even show my face. But you heard me crying, you sat outside the temple and kept me company" she explained shyly.
Haru blinked, then a look of shock came upon his face. Now he remembered, when he was small he heard a girl crying inside the temple. However, respecting their privacy he had sat outside and kept them company until they felt better. He never saw their face and he never met them, but somehow, he felt a strong desire to protect them. He never thought that girl would turn out to be Rin, that she would be a demon of all things.
A sad smile came across Rin's face, of course he would be repulsed. Oh hey, I've been watching you your whole life because I protect this temple. Oh, and I'm actually in love with you. Like that didn't sound like a stalker, there was no way to say this without sounding creepy. But she couldn't help but be honest, it was in her nature to be so.
"You, you've been watching over me for the past 6 years. So, when you told me you loved me, that was…" Haru said in utter disbelief. He had thought Rin had kissed him to tease him, it had been genuine. She saved her first everything for him, she had done it all out of love. He felt so badly for treating her like a child up until now. He knew she had inherited the temple from her grandpa, but she never said at what age or for how long. So, he simply assumed she had been of an age where she would have adapted.
Rin blushed, honestly Haru could be such an idiot sometimes. His habit of jumping to conclusions occasionally really was a pain in the ass. She knew being a priest he had to be guarded, but being overly suspicious was not attractive. "I know the myths about Tengu being perverted. But believe it or not for some of us it really is a myth" she growled under her breath irritably.
Yes, there were a lot of males at her home village whom were as horny and perverted as people made them out to be. But some were shy, passive and even awkward when it came to such matters. Hell, there were some girls who could even be awkward and dirty minded, while some were ladylike and avoided the topic altogether. She herself had a healthy mind that did have dirty thoughts, but they did not at as her main thought process.
Haru couldn't argue there, even though Rin had made it obvious on many occasions that she cared about him. However, he had simply seen it as a form of attention seeking and playfulness being a demon. However, her feelings for him were genuine and he felt bad for not having taken them seriously. No wonder she was always irritable or upset when he ignored her or was kind towards other women.
Haru sat beside the young Tengu, then placed his arm around her shoulder, then pulled her close to him. Rin's cheeks lit up with embarrassment as it was not often Haru took control like this. He had a musky scent about him, his body was warm and well formed. She knew him as the boy she had fallen for but watching him grow up too. He really had become a man and a handsome one at that.
However, though she was forward and flirty when it came to kissing, she had never really made it past that. When it came to sex, that was a completely different matter altogether. But it was something she had dreamed about happening with the one she loved. "Um… Haru" she stammered shyly. He was acting very unlike himself, usually he was stern and sharp tongued with her. It was rare she ever saw Haru show such a gentle side to anyone but Makoto.
"You had a bad dream right, one that made you cry. Thinking about your grandpa. You must have felt lonely even with me in the dream, right?" he replied bluntly. Even if Rin hid her pain, he would still comfort her. Like he said, it wasn't good to bottle up your feelings. Even if Rin would only give him the basic talk of her problems, he would help her heal through physical attention. She would enjoy that wouldn't she? If she cared about him?
Rin blushed, was he worried about her? But, even so it felt like he was forcing himself to do this because it felt like the right thing. Because as a priest he could not ignore someone who was in need. "You… you don't have to force yourself to comfort me out of pity. I know you don't like me" she snapped defiantly. He took her in when she told him she was a guardian and it was made obvious she had no home.
She lived off of offerings and would eat fruit from trees, which was not enough to sustain her. She bathed in secret at springs or in rain, looking after herself in her own way due to not being able to return home. She had to make do with the best that she had, but that only made her more resilient. She was a tough nut to crack and was a strong willed girl.
Haru irked upon hearing that, his eyebrow twitching and a look of annoyance on his face. Did she really just say that to him? Sure, he wasn't overly romantic or a walking Romeo showering her with affection. But he did care for her in his own way and yes, he enjoyed her company. The way he felt about her was different than how he felt about Makoto. But he had never had a girl tell him that she loved him before.
"I never do anything I don't want to do. Right now, I'm comforting you because I want to, because I hate seeing you cry" he replied tenderly. Knowing Rin had been the crying girl from his childhood only made him want to hold her even tighter. To wipe away her tears and reassure her that everything would be ok. Impressed that despite her sorrows, she had worked hard enough to protect her temple and shrine for all these years.
Rin went silent, her mind going blank and she swore steam was erupting from her head. That almost sounded like a love confession, but she had always taken Haru to be indifferent and bossy. "B… But I thought you found me annoying. Aren't you just kind to me because you feel sorry for a pitiful Tengu" she replied in a stubborn tone. Though deep down the idea of Haru even caring about her a little bit made her happy.
Haru peered at Rin, a cold glare on his face "Do you really think me that heartless, I may be bossy. But I am not incapable of emotions. Thus, you would not be jealous of Makoto" he reminded her impatiently. He had seen the way Rin glared at her, sure she understood their friendship and was softer around Makoto now. But every now and again she would become irritated about their closeness.
Rin huffed, ok he had her there. She had been very jealous of Makoto before she realized their friendship. As childish as she had been, she could see the two genuinely cared about one another. But that still left her curious about how Haru felt about her, why he kept showing her different sides to himself in such a way. He went from being hot to cold so quickly it left her unable to understand completely.
"What do you like about me? I mean I guess you've already found out in my case" she asked curiously her tone stubborn. He had better not be messing with her here or she would be avoiding him for a long time. If he so much as made fun of her for being jealous of another girl she would be pissed. She had hidden her feelings from him from her clan after all.
Haru hummed, he had never really had the time to think about this fully. He had noticed small things she did over time that he found cute, funny or things about her physically that were attractive. "You have beautiful eyes; the colour is very alluring and mysterious. Your hair is really silky too. I've never really thought much of girls with short hair before, or any girls in general. But on you its cute" he replied casually.
Rin gasped, how could he say such embarrassing things so easily. He just called her cute and didn't even get flustered. Back when she decided to cut off her hair, everyone gave her a hard time. But Haru liked it. Hell, though she had gotten compliments before, most guys at the village only wanted her for her status or purely for a physical relationship.
"I admit, when you get moody or sulk it can be annoying when I have duties. But when your shy or upset at being neglected its kind of cute. It makes me want to spoil you, like right now" he replied with a smile and a chuckle. Her cheeks reminded him of strawberries, so bright and red. Full of colour, so beautiful, something he could admire without end.
Rin frowned, was he calling her a kid or complimenting her here. She had mixed feelings about the last comment, as it felt he was laughing at her. She knew he was just being honest, but things you said could be interpreted differently. "So, your calling me childish" she grumbled. She wondered if anyone else knew about his secret mean streak.
Haru smiled, yep there was that cute side he was talking about. "No, your showing your fragile side. Your allowing me to see your weaknesses and that makes me want to shower you with affection" he replied. Though he had always been a giving person due to his grandfathers influence, but never a pushover. Somehow, when he was around Rin he wanted to spoil her endlessly and hold her in his arms.
Rin peered up at him with wide eyes, was he saying he liked her too? Was he admitting he loved her too? No, it was too soon for that, but perhaps he was harbouring a crush, blossoming feelings? I mean he pretty much admitted that he enjoyed showing her affection because her weakness brought out his desire to protect her didn't he? I mean it sounded like it to her.
Haru saw the hope in her eyes and shifted, ok now it was his turn to be embarrassed. Why was it this demon had such an influence on his heart? "I… I do have feelings for you Rin, but whether it's a desire to protect you out of duty as a priest and our partnership. Or if they are romantic, I cannot say. I just know I care about you" he explained.
Rin softened, a playful smile appearing on her face. Oh, how naïve Haru could be, but that was one of his cute aspects. She then leaned upwards and kissed his cheek affectionately making him blush. "Thank you Haru, for making me feel better. But as far as your feelings, we can work them out together" she reassured him. But she would make sure to kindle them, as selfish as it was she wanted his love to be requited. To make Haru see how deeply she cared.
Haru sighed but ruffled her hair affectionately. Glad to know she was feeling better and her tears would not be returning any time soon. As her smile was something he preferred to see. The two of them sat on the porch together in the quiet. This was nice, just the two of them bonding. Feeling refreshed and lighter, their problems no longer giving them grief.
Oji-chan-Grandpa