Their walk home was a silent one. Ji Hoo didn't know exactly what to say or how to approach the subject at hand. It would be a lie to say he didn't feel weird about Jan Di meeting with Young Jae at a restaurant. But what could he say exactly? How would he broach the subject? Then there was the topic of Min Ji. Now that felt impossible. What made it even worse was the fact that Jan Di had been across the street from the bar where Min Ji had been pulling the strings. If he had not submitted to her demands, would Jan Di have been safe? He wasn't so sure.

He hung his jacket on the coat rack, rubbing his bare hands together to warm them up. He had lent his gloves to Min Ji. While it wasn't a big deal, Ji Hoo couldn't help but feel as though he did something wrong. It felt like he betrayed Jan Di.

He turned his head and watched as Jan Di hung up her own jacket and then pulled the black gloves off. From where he stood, he could easily tell by their appearance that the gloves were made of lower quality. Some, like Jun Pyo, Yi-Jeong, or Woo Bin, would have called it cheap fabric. He knew they weren't hers, either. She gripped tightly onto the gloves as she strolled into the living room. Ji Hoo followed behind and observed her; she appeared to be in some kind of daze from the way she walked aimlessly to her room. She didn't even speak to him, let alone utter a single word.

Ji Hoo didn't like this feeling at all. It reminded him of the moments in their life where they grew distant, if only briefly. The time after Ji Hoo caught her lying at Jun Pyo's house and the other when he confessed his feelings towards her, which were initially not reciprocated. Still, both times, they looked past the hardships and stood strong, side by side. Those were the days, back when things were simple and their issues were petty.

But now it felt different. Could he ease her mind simply by talking to her? Would she open her mind—her heart—and hear him out? There was too much to explain. So much even he didn't know.

I can't say anything yet.

Before it was somewhat simple, that he was being targeted by some woman. But now that he delved a little deeper, Jan Di was most certainly involved. Specifically, Min Ji knew that Jan Di knocked someone unconscious at the warehouse.

Ji Hoo knew that this man died. The information was reported to Ji Hoo a while back by Woo Bin. He didn't tell Jan Di simply because he knew that this would weigh heavily on her heart; did she mean to kill someone? Of course not—Jan Di was only acting in defense for F4 and her brother. She had no intention to kill anyone.

I have to find out what else Min Ji knows. Ji Hoo didn't plan on keeping this information from her forever. But he wanted to protect her. Only for a little while longer, he told himself.

But it was obvious there was something on her mind. His heart was racing, he couldn't rid himself of his anxious thoughts that flooded his mind. All the what-ifs and terrible ideas filled his brain. It felt so familiar.

Like when he realized he loved her.

It scared him. Ji Hoo was terrified when he started looking at Jan Di in a different light, when he started imagining being with her, and especially when he found that he couldn't sleep without her being on his mind. Those were the days when he found himself restless and when he began falling out of love with Seo Hyun.

This same feeling arose when he finally confessed to Jan Di that he, in fact, loved her. He loved her so damn much that he couldn't stand by any longer and watch her get hurt by anyone else. So why did he feel this way? Why was it so hard to approach her, just like when he decided to tell her that he loved her? Maybe Seo Hyun would know the answer. I'll have to talk to her. But first: Jan Di. Ji Hoo would just have to try; after all, it was better than the what-ifs that filled his mind.

He inhaled heavily and strolled to Jan Di's room. Using the back of his palm, he knocked gently on the sliding door. At first, there was no response. But then he heard shuffling, and Jan Di opened the door, peeking at him through the crack.

"...Yes? Is there something wrong?" she asked.

Ji Hoo tilted his head, gesturing for her to come out. "Isn't there? Let's talk in the living room. I'll wait for you, so take as long as you need."

He made his way back to the living room and sat on the couch. He crossed one leg over his knee and rested his elbow on the arm of the couch. While he waited for her, he gazed out the glass windows, watching as the snow drifted down from the sky. It was a beautiful sight, truly. But this was the kind of view that he knew he would appreciate better with Jan Di.

Ji Hoo checked the time on his phone. It was growing close ten at night. The whole day felt like disaster from start to finish, but before he went to bed, he wanted to make things right with Jan Di as best he could. Well, that's if he could.

She appeared in the living room close to ten minutes later. Ji Hoo didn't notice at first, until he saw her reflection through the window. He glanced over his shoulder at her. She remained by the doorway with her arms folded across her chest. She shifted on her feet, averting her eyes from him.

"What was it you wanted to talk about?" she asked quietly.

He wasn't sure where to begin, but he decided getting her to come a little closer would help repair their connection. It was weird how a bump in the road in a span of a day caused such a stir between them. He patted the empty spot beside him on the couch.

She took a minute, but eventually she made her way over and seated herself on the couch, though there was a good couple inches between them. Now things were beginning to get awkward, Ji Hoo could feel it. As he glanced over at Jan Di, he noticed she had changed into a pair of sweats. He shifted his gaze back over to the glass windows, watching the snow fall.

His heart took a leap. "Beautiful," he sighed aloud.

"The snow is beautiful," Jan Di replied back quietly.

"I wasn't talking about the snow," Ji Hoo replied, keeping his eyes locked onto the blissful snow. "You're beautiful," he murmured, now turning his attention to her. The glittering specks of white crystalized dust couldn't hold a flame to Jan Di.

It seemed that he caught Jan Di's attention now. She looked a little startled, which he could easily tell from the way she opened her mouth as if to say something. But then her lips closed, she pursed her lips together, and she averted her gaze from his.

"Caught you off guard?" he asked teasingly.

"When don't you?" she breathed out, shaking her head. "Even when I'm...this way, you find a way to catch me off guard."

For a couple minutes, they sat in silence. But that was all Ji Hoo needed to feel at ease once more. Knowing that they finally spoke, engaged in a conversation, he had a feeling that things could still be mended. That this rough patch in the road was only temporary.

Jan Di spoke up once more, "I...was worried about you."

When he turned his head towards her once more, he could see the earnest look in her eyes. But her fidgeting told a different story; she pulled and tugged at the hems of her sleeves. There was something clearly on her mind.

"I'm sorry," he replied. "I'm sorry for worrying you." He reached for her fidgeting hand, took it into his, and squeezed it gently. "The way I've been treating you isn't right."

He watched as Jan Di glanced away, slipping her hand from his grasp. "No, it's okay, sunbae. I guess...I just started overthinking, that's all." She then smiled at him and folded her hands on her lap. "I'm sorry for the other day."

This wasn't going as he had hoped. But maybe they needed some time apart, to think over the unfolding events, and to process it properly. Ji Hoo himself wasn't ready to have the discussion either way. He was sure Jan Di wasn't either.

"Don't worry about it," he forced himself to say with a smile. "It happens. This was just a rough patch in the road."

"Yeah," she agreed, nodding her head. "Just a rough patch. I mean, I went through a lot of it with…" Ji Hoo noticed her stopping mid-sentence, as if to save herself from saying the next few words. But he already knew what she was referring to.

You went through a lot of it with Jun Pyo, right?

Was Ji Hoo doing the same thing as his friend? A sudden feeling of nausea fell over him. Maybe it was the mixture of the stress and drinking. Or maybe he just felt sick to his stomach at the idea he was causing Jan Di distress.

This wasn't good to talk about. Ji Hoo simply leaned back into the cushioning of the couch, rubbing his forehead. "Yeah. Relationships are simply like that." Figuring that there was nothing more to say, Ji Hoo turned his head away. "I think I'll be going to bed early tonight. I spent some time with Woo Bin at the bar, so I'm feeling the effects."

Jan Di's voice came out in a quiet murmur, "I'm going to bed early, too. I'm feeling pretty tired."

A part of him wanted to ask her if she wanted to spend the night in his room. He was tired of having her far from his grasp, and he most definitely didn't want to think about the endless possibilities of what could happen to them. He was going to ask, but Jan Di spoke first.

"Ji Hoo, could I get my phone from your car? I want to call Ga Eul tonight to see how she's doing," Jan Di said.

He cleared his throat and nodded his head. "...Yeah. I'll go grab it."

Perhaps spending the night together was out of the question.

Ji Hoo left quickly to get the phone from his car. While he was gone, Jan Di sat silently on the couch. At first, she didn't know what to think or say. She didn't know what was going on. He said he was spending time with Woo Bin, so then why did I see him leave with a woman? He was obviously lying. Of course, Ji Hoo wasn't foreign to lying; there were numerous times when he did lie, but it was always to protect her.

So then why did he lie this time after seeing that woman? Was it possible that—

No, she told herself, You will not think of him like that.

But what else could it be? Jan Di felt numb, but for how long?

Finally, Ji Hoo returned, her phone in hand. "It's dead," he told her as he sat back down on the couch. "I'm not surprised, considering how long it's been in the car."

"Thanks," Jan Di said quickly, taking the phone from him. Then, to avoid making eye-contact with him, she got up from the couch and began leaving. A part of her wanted to stop and confess that she was confused, a little upset, and frustrated. But another part of her wanted it to be Ji Hoo this time to discuss what went down that day. But it was clear he didn't want to talk about it, despite being the one who wanted to talk. It would be nice if he followed after her and confessed that he'd been seeing someone else, if that were the truth.

But he didn't.

Jan Di reached her room without another word spoken between them. Perhaps it was better that way. Upon entering her room, she closed the door quietly behind her. With her back against it, she exhaled shakily. Her fingers gripped tightly onto the phone in her hand, though they grew sweaty from the tension. From the waiting. From the hurt.

It slipped from her grasp, landing on the floor with a thud. She went with it. Keeping her back against the door, she slid down until her knees were up against her chest. It was starting to hurt a lot. Her heart ached; it throbbed heavily. It felt as though someone were squeezing her heart, causing this sudden pain.

"No one said this was going to be easy," she whispered to herself, as if to remind her that this heartache was normal. It had to be; she experienced it frequently with Jun Pyo. But Ji Hoo is different. He had always taken her feelings into consideration. God, he had taken a bullet for her that could have killed him. So what was going on?

Maybe Ga Eul would know. Jan Di plugged in her phone and waited for it to charge. When it did, she dialed her friend's number and waited as the line rang. She perked up a little when she heard her friend's voice:

"Hello? Jan Di?" Ga Eul asked. Jan Di could hear a yawn follow afterwards.

"Hi Ga Eul," Jan Di replied, clearing her throat. "I, uh...just wanted to see what you were up to."

There was a short pause before she heard Ga Eul's voice again, "...This late at night?"

"Yes." Jan Di chewed on her bottom lip. "Is that weird?"

"Okay." There was a sound of rustling sheets in the background. "Tell me what's wrong, Jan Di."

If there was one thing Jan Di appreciated Ga Eul for, it was always being there, no matter the situation or scenario. Whatever it was, Ga Eul was there in a heartbeat. So, as Ga Eul asked, Jan Di spilled her heart out, telling her friend all about how the rest of the day went since they last talked, what she saw (the woman), and Ji Hoo's attempt to discuss things.

At first, Ga Eul was quiet. Then she spoke, "I'm sorry Jan Di, this all sounds really difficult… Who do you think that woman is?"

"I don't know," Jan Di confessed in a breathy voice. "She was...very pretty, though. Looked like she came from good money."

"Maybe she's family?" Ga Eul asked.

"So why lie? He said he was with Woo Bin, and he didn't even mention her," Jan Di replied. "It doesn't make sense. Not to mention.." She paused, not sure how to phrase it. Well, it had to come out one way or another no matter how she worded it. "I...was informed by a friend that he was with a woman at a restaurant last night. I think that might have been the same one he was with today."

"Oh, Jan Di," murmured Ga Eul. It stung to hear the sympathy that was weaved into her tone. "I have a hard time believing Ji Hoo would ever do something sneaky like that."

"I...I do too, but what if, Ga Eul?" Jan Di replied. "What if that's the case, and our relationship is...going into the shithole?"

"You need to talk to him. Bring it up—"

Jan Di interrupted her, "I can't. I'm afraid, Ga Eul." She inhaled heavily and then sighed. "If I push too much, what if I push him away from me? I don't think I want to know the truth.."

"This isn't the Jan Di I know," Ga Eul said. "You would never take this kind of treatment. In fact, the Jan Di I know would kick a man to the curb—"

"Ga Eul, I think...I think I love him too much," Jan Di confessed. Of course, she loved Ji Hoo very much. But the thing that made it hard was that Jan Di couldn't see herself with anyone else or even without Ji Hoo. When he left to be with Seo Hyun back when they first met, Jan Di was upset. But she was also able to grow from it. Now? She wasn't so sure.

"Oh, Jan Di…" Ga Eul fell silent for a moment. Then her voice perked up again, "Even if the truth is scary, you have to come and face it. That's what our Geum Jan Di always did."

"I know you're right, Ga Eul," Jan Di sighed, laying down on the bed. "It just feels so much more difficult now. I don't want this to be another Macau incident...you know?"

"Well if it is, let me know. I'll come talk to Ji Hoo myself—"

That comment earned a tiny laugh from Jan Di. "Thanks, Ga Eul, but I don't think it'll be necessary. Besides, that'll put you at odds with Yi-Jeong."

"You think that's going to stop me? You before any boy, Jan Di. Remember that."

Ji Hoo started to fall asleep. With his legs splayed open and his forearm draped over his forehead, he began to drift: into a whole new world—a dream world—where maybe things were just a bit better than this horrid reality.

His drifting was disrupted when he felt something vibrate in his pocket. My phone. At first, Ji Hoo was hesitant. He didn't answer it immediately, nor did he even look at it. He remained completely still, thinking—contemplating—if he wanted to read a message that could either be good or bad news. He was thinking it was the latter. If it was, then he didn't want to answer it.

For some odd reason, he decided to glance at his phone. He slipped it out of his pocket, feeling his dread fill up. On the lockscreen, he saw a message from Woo Bin, and relief flooded over him. Ji Hoo unlocked his phone and read the text.

Woo Bin: Did you talk to Jan Di yet

He took a moment to think of a response. Ji Hoo did say he would talk to Jan Di, but things didn't pan out like he wanted them to. He had to be honest. He texted his friend back:

Ji Hoo: Not exactly

Ji Hoo: Things are a bit more complicated than I thought

Woo Bin: I see

Woo Bin: Guess that means you couldn't woo her?

He shook his head and laughed a little. Oftentimes, Woo Bin could be a real player and a cool dude. But other times he was plain ridiculous. Ji Hoo didn't mind the jokes; he welcomed them, especially with the current, overwhelming situation.

Ji Hoo: Were you able to find out anything about the van?

Woo Bin: Not yet. Will get more info soon. It's complicated

Ji Hoo: I appreciate it. Goodnight

Woo Bin: Gn

Ji Hoo locked his phone and left it on his lap. Then he rested the back of his head against the couch cushion, sinking further into the couch. He closed his eyes, breathed out, and relaxed himself. Or at least, he tried to. But one thing remained on his mind and that was how to keep Jan Di safe. For some reason, fate seemed insistent on keeping them apart.

Maybe it's not meant to be.

Ga Eul stood on the bridge in the late evening, gazing out at the night sky. Stars glimmered and sparkled; it truly was a beautiful night. A strong wind blew past her, brushing through her hair and knocking her headband out. She spun around and attempted to grab at it before it flew in the street. Luckily, someone else caught it for her.

He grinned, holding up the flimsy piece of fabric in the air between his two fingers, and approached her. "Lose something?"

"Couldn't you be more eloquent?" Ga Eul huffed, grabbing the headband from Woo Bin. "Yi-Jeong would have been more classy about it."

"You know a lot about being classy then?" Woo Bin replied as he rested his elbows on the bridge railing. "I've known Yi-Jeong all my life—he isn't as 'eloquent' as you think he is, trust me."

"Well, it's enough for me," Ga Eul murmured as she stuffed the headband into her pocket. She crossed her arms. "So then, you said you have an idea?"

"Yes," Woo Bin replied. "I know we want the same thing."

She nodded in agreement. "Yes… But is this the right next step? I can't help but feel as though this might not go like we planned."

"Does anything?" Woo Bin glanced over at her. "It'll work out, some way or another. We'll come out stronger than before, that's for sure."

"Wow, suddenly you're sounding a bit more 'eloquent.' Like a certain someone I know," Ga Eul teased. She then sighed. "Gosh, I miss him."

"You and me, both," he agreed.

For a moment, Ga Eul stood beside Woo Bin, feeling the gentle breeze brush through her hair. She was a little nervous, but she was also excited. She was also certain that Woo Bin felt the same way.