Why do we do things even if it hurts us? I wonder…
Once she was done cleaning his wound, they resumed their journey. They did not know what dangers awaited them.
Neither dared to speak as each was consumed recollecting the events of the morning. The silence in the car was deafening.
Luna noticed Leon's expressions and she could tell that he was troubled by the possible death of their peers. She too was distraught, but one thing she was good at was making other people forget about their sorrows. She made it a point to normalize the situation whenever possible.
Sulking on the events of the past would not help their current situation, so Luna decided the break the ice. "Should we stop at a nearby outpost to get cleaned up?"
"I don't think that's a good idea," he responded briefly.
"Leon, hygiene is very important. The importance of brushing, flossing, and showering daily, cannot be overstated," she narrated to him as if talking to a child. She tried to lighten the situation.
He let go of one of his hands from the steering for an epic facepalm. "I know that. I meant stopping at the outpost is not a good idea."
She laughed before indulging him further. "Why do you think so?"
"When a fugitive is on the run, the first thing we do to track them down is to set a checkpoint at their basic necessities. Food, water, and shelter. If the Empire wants to find you, then they will certainly keep tabs on nearby outposts," he elucidated, like a seasoned mercenary.
"Can't we just use their amenities?" she complained.
"I don't think it's worth the risk. Besides, the nearest outpost is still a few miles away. It will be a while before we reach there," he replied.
"Aww, I really wanted to freshen up," she grumbled.
"It's not exactly princess standard, but we are driving right next to the river," he suggested, expecting an affirmative reply. He knew very well how to push her buttons. Anything he suggested that she couldn't do because of her being a princess automatically became a dare for her.
"River would do just fine," she replied, as expected. Leon's lips automatically curled up in his silent victory.
"As you wish," he said, looking for a decent spot to take a break.
After a while, they came to a secluded area where their car could easily be hidden in the bushes.
"Open the trunk, please," she requested, and he obliged. She made her way to the trunk and started fumbling around with her bags.
"I am going to scout the area to make sure it is safe. Don't venture too far from here. Call me if you need me," he instructed.
"Yes, boss," she replied playfully with a mock salute. Once he left, she went back to fishing her luggage.
He cleared out the area of a few stragglers Saberclaws.
After scouting the area thoroughly, he returned to the car. "It should be safe here for now. Right behind those rocks, there is a small waterfall in a secluded area. Even the water downstream from there is not too deep. Over there are some coconut palm trees right along the riverfront making it a suitable location to relax if you want," he described, pointing at each location.
It wasn't until he finished his scouting report that he saw Luna holding many things in her hands. She had a towel, travel kit, clothes, and a few other things. "Where are you going with all that?" he questioned, pointing at many things in her hand.
"Right behind those rocks there is a small waterfall in a secluded area," she said mimicking his voice. "I am going to go there to brush my teeth, take a bath, and get changed."
It was time for another facepalm. "If you haven't noticed we are on the run for our lives," he said seriously.
"If you haven't noticed, I am still in my nightdress. I don't want to die wearing a chocobo pajama." Somehow her tone left no room for further argument.
"You have strange priorities," he commented, shaking his head.
"Now I'll go take a bath over there and you stand here and watch guard," she commanded.
"No."
"Good," she said before realizing that he had not agreed to her terms. "What do you mean, no?"
"It means I am not going to stand here to watch guard," he asserted, as his eyes scanned the area once more. "I will stand by that rock."
"You pervert, you just want to be close enough so you can look," she accused, narrowing her eyes.
He gave himself a facepalm before explaining his rationale. "I just want to be close enough so I can hear you scream. There is a waterfall over there, and if you haven't noticed it generates a lot of noise. If something were to happen and if you were to scream, I won't hear it all the way out here. If I stand over there, then I can at least hear you or warn you if required."
"Okay, that makes sense," she admitted sheepishly.
They made their way towards the waterfall, making small talks. "If you need me, just yell ice-cream," he suggested.
"Ice-cream?" she asked.
"Yes, that's our code word. I'll come charging in if you say the code word."
"Why can't I just yell help like a normal person?"
"You could," he said with a shrug. "But it's not fun."
"You have a very weird idea of fun," she said, rolling her eyes.
Once Leon reached his designated location he announced, "I guess I can use this time to do my daily exercise." He looked at a branch of a nearby tree and wondered if he could use it for pull-ups.
"Alright, and remember no peeking," she said in a playful voice.
"If you say it one more time, then I'll make it a point to look," he warned.
She pulled an imaginary zipper on her lips.
She disappeared from sight as Leon got busy exercising. Exercise and training were two of his favorite things. He is usually very focused during these activities and often loses track of time. However, today, his mind kept on thinking about the events that had transpired so far. But if there was one thing he prides on, that was his discipline. The more his mind wandered, the harder he trained. He avoided all distraction; he worked out as a man possessed.
A familiar voice fake coughed to break his concentration. "Do you train this rigorously every day?"
He stopped doing his pushups and looked at the friendly intruder. She wore a carmine-pink and white top held up by a string that wraps around her neck. Underneath the top, she wore a double layer flare skirt. The top layer was light pink with a white stripe while the bottom layer was plain white. She wore paler brown boots. Her long hair was styled in a braid down her back, with curls on either side of her face, framing her face. A red ribbon tied her hair together. She looked beautiful.
"Yes. I train like this even when I am sick. The discipline of mind and body is essential for a soldier," he remarked, catching his breath, getting back on his feet.
"Impressive. I meditate and pray every day. The discipline of mind and soul is essential for an Oracle," she responded, mirroring his statement.
"I see. Meditation is very good to focus your mind. Perhaps you can teach me your meditation technique?" he requested, wiping off the sweat from his forehead.
"I can teach you, but not until you take a bath first," she said pinching her nose playfully.
"As you wish," he said, as he gathered all his belongings. "Your turn to watch guard now."
"No"
"Huh?"
"It's my time to meditate and pray. She will watch guard," Luna stated, pointing at Pryna at a distance.
He looked at Pryna and thought of his own pal, 'I haven't seen Umbra in a while.'
He nodded at Luna and made his way to his bath.
A few minutes into the meditation, Luna felt a sudden chill. She opened her eyes and was greeted by the friendly face of Genitana.
"My lady, I have come to caution you," Gentiana stated with her eyes closed. Luna got very attentive.
"A human heart can be very treacherous. Desires not tamed can lead one astray."
Luna knew what Gentiana was referring to. "I am committed to my cause, rest assured," she declared with a steely resolve.
"Of that, I have little doubt. My concern is not of your goals, but your heart."
"What of it?"
"The bond of the Oracle and her Shield has grown beyond friendship. Should this bond continue to grow unchecked, it will lead to misery and pain. When this bond is severed, it will leave behind two broken hearts: yours and his."
"What would you have me do?"
"That is not for me to decide. Be very cautious of where your heart leads you. That is all I came to say."
Luna nodded and Gentiana disappeared from her sight.
Luna knew that she would have to address her feelings for Leon at some point. Just not right now. She shut out any Leon and Noctis related thoughts and returned to her meditation.
After finishing his morning rituals, he came back to see her sitting still in meditation, breathing evenly and deeply. He sat quietly next to her, waiting for her to wake up.
She opened her eyes and saw him sitting next to her with his legs crossed. She noticed he was wearing a high collar sleeveless indigo shirt, black pants and boots, and black cloth covering his left leg and arm. He had a shoulder pauldron, and his chest was covered by two straps, held in place by a lion-like badge. "I am sorry. I did not realize that you were back. How long were you waiting?"
"Just a few minutes. Didn't want to disturb you from your meditation," he responded, getting up.
"Thank you. That is very considerate of you," she replied, grabbing his hand to stand up.
"Shall we go?" he asked.
"No, not before we capture this moment," she said with a smile. "Give me your phone."
She got his phone and took a selfie to capture their journey. It was almost noontime and her stomach growled demanding attention.
"Hungry?" he asked.
"A little," she replied.
"Hmm, we did not stock up on food. We have some chips, cookies, and soda in the car. Or we can find something in the wild to eat," he wondered, stroking his chin thinking.
"I don't want any junk food. But what can we get out here?" she wondered.
"I know just the thing that you would like," he remarked, taking the lead.
After jumping through a few rocks and stepping over a few bushes, they finally made it to their desired location.
"When I came here earlier, I saw coconut palm trees. So, would you like some coconut water?" he offered.
"I would love it," she confessed, getting excited.
"Why don't you go get the straws from the car, I'll work on getting the coconut," he proposed the plan.
"You got it," she agreed cheerfully, making her way to the car.
They meet up at the agreed site and Leon had two coconuts in his either hand. He had his pants rolled up to his knees and was barefoot, as his boots were tossed at some distance. He motioned her to follow him.
He sat by the river with his feet dipping in water. The stream of water splashed at his feet, causing rippled downstream. Luna removed her shoes and joined him. She swung her legs freely in water like a child, causing a bigger splash.
Leon had prepped the coconut prior to her arrival. He poked a hole in it with his dagger and inserted the straw and offered it to Luna.
"Thank you," she said with a smile. He nodded and continued poking a hole through another coconut; this one was for himself.
"Do you always carry that dagger with you? I noticed you had it back when we fought against Titan," she asked curiously, looking at the dagger.
"It's a survival knife. A dear friend of mine gave it to me as our parting gift. She said I should hold on to it so we have a reason to meet again. It's a shame I don't remember her anymore. I've been carrying it with me ever since. It has gotten me out of tough situations many times."
"Interesting story," she commented, before sipping her coconut.
They were sitting under the light shade of coconut palm trees, sipping coconut. Their legs freely swung in the lukewarm water. The birds sang melodious tunes and gentle breezes danced around them, providing a soothing atmosphere. To think that they were running away for their lives just a few hours ago seemed like a distant memory. Luna took their customary selfie capturing this perfect moment.
He had offered to go, but she insisted on staying there for a few more minutes.
"Leon, I can't do this anymore. I am tired of seeing people die for my sake. I am tired to see you getting hurt for my sake. It is one thing for me to sacrifice everything I have to protect the world, but I can't bear to watch others sacrificing themselves for me."
"People have not sacrificed their lives for you; they did it for a cause they believed in. The only way to honor their sacrifice is to keep going on this path," he encouraged.
"The path that I walk on only leads to more despair and dismay," she sighed, looking at her distorted reflection in the water.
"That may be so, but it's a worthy price for a brighter future."
"Yeah," she whispered quietly.
Luna hadn't said anything for a while. She seemed distracted; he noticed.
"Everything okay?" he asked with concern.
"Leon, what would happen to us once this is over?"
He took a deep breath and begin to answer. "You will get married to your prince charming and live happily ever after. I will go back to my time and will try to pick up the pieces and make something out of it."
"No, I mean, what would happen to us?" she choked, placing her left hand on his right hand.
Luna was torn by her current predicament. She cared about Leon deeply that much she knew. But how deep were her feelings for him, she did not know. Perhaps she knew but was too stubborn to admit it.
With their nascent relationship, Leon knew they needed to have this conversation sometime. He just didn't think it would be today. They were more than friends, even Leon could tell. His loyalty to her was unquestioning but was it out of duty, honor, or feelings, he did not know. Perhaps he knew but did not have the courage to admit it.
"We," he paused, trying to gather his thoughts. "We will become memories. Our time together will become past and we will reflect on it either fondly or with regret."
"I don't want this to end. I don't want this to become a fragment of a forgotten memory."
"I don't think we have a choice in that," Leon replied solemnly.
"I know," she sighed with resignation. "Such is our fate," she radiated sadness with every word.
'What we have is something pure and beautiful. Anything further than this will just lead to more heartache.' He decided it would be best for them to keep their distance to avoid any further attachment. But his walls crumble as soon as he saw water forming at the edge of her eyes.
He lifted her chin and made her look into his eyes. "We decide our fate by the choices we make and the actions we take. Sometimes circumstances dictate our choices, but that is okay, not everything has to go according to our wishes. It is precisely when things don't go our way that we yearn, learn, adapt, improve, improvise, and grow. It is in this struggle that our conviction, courage, character, resilience, grit, and our bonds are tested. It is in this struggle that you realize what is worth fighting for and how much you are willing to sacrifice for it. No goal can be achieved without sacrifice. For a goal as noble as yours, saving the world from eternal darkness, if you have to sacrifice your freedom to choose, then don't have second thoughts."
'I have lived most of my life like a prisoner in my own castle. I don't care about losing my freedom. If I walk on the path I am supposed to, then I might save the world, but I will lose you in the process!'
For the first time in her life, she was not content by simply doing what was supposed to do. She loved Noctis because it was her duty. She loved Leon because she wanted to. She felt torn between her duty and her heart.
"Leon, I don't think I have the courage to sacrifice what I am asked for," she confessed averting her gaze.
"Luna, you are a lot stronger than you think you are. In fact, you are one of the most courageous people I have ever known. At a young age, you lost your parents, your brother defected, your kingdom lost, you were a prisoner in your own castle, and in spite of all that you never gave up. You traveled around the world, giving hope to people when you had none. You put a smile on the face of people whenever you went even though you had lost yours. You healed people even when you were hurt the most. If that is not courage, then I don't know what is."
'I did all that because back then I had nothing to lose. Now I am afraid of losing you. I think I should be blunt and just say it, he is really not getting this.'
"I am neither loyal to my duties nor to my heart. It is not fair to him and it sure as hell is not fair to you. I am a horrible person," she spoke as tears streamed down her face.
Before she could speak any further, he wrapped his arm around her and pulled her closer to him. She rested her head on his shoulder and continued to sob.
'To belong to someone you can never be with and forgo the one you want to be with, such is my fate,' she thought.
He could not bear to see her sad, so he tried to cheer her up. "Someday when I look back at our time together, I don't want to look at it with regret. We can't control what happens to us in the future, but we can choose what we do now. So, let's make the best out of what we have right now. If we are to be memories, then let's make the best memories together."
He knew fully well that he would come to regret this advice. The only thing 'making the best of their time' would bring him is pain. The more they stayed together, the more they liked each other and the more difficult it would be to stay apart. But if his pain is the price for her happiness, then he would gladly pay it.
His suggestion seem to briefly bring a smile back on her face. "It is so unlike you to cheer someone up, but you still did it for me, and for that, I am grateful to you," she acknowledged, looking up at him. He just nodded slightly in acknowledgment.
"I don't like to see you cry," he confessed, releasing her from his hug.
"Then I promise not to cry," she assured, wiping her tears. 'I promise not to cry in front of you at least.'
They went back to sipping his coconut as silence accompanied them once again. It was their conscious choice not to think about the past or the future and enjoy what they had now. They resumed their journey after their long break.
They made a stop at Meldacio Hunter HQ for a delivery. Knowing that they won't be able to say at an outpost for a while, and sleeping under the stars might be their only option, Luna purchased some groceries when Leon was busy running errands.
When Leon came back, he saw Luna wearing a cap and sunglasses. "How do I look?" she eagerly asked, as he approached the car.
"Beautiful as always," words came out of his mouth unfiltered.
She immediately blushed at his honest response. He wished he had timed it.
"What brought about this change?" he questioned, sitting in the driver's seat.
"Just wanted to blend in with everyone else. Also, for those who don't know me so well, it would make a little harder to identify me in this," she gave her rationale.
"Now you are starting to think like a fugitive on the run. I am proud of you," he remarked casually, as he started the car.
They continued their journey with minimal hostility for now. As their car ride started getting longer, a pattern emerged. Luna would often read a book while Leon drove silently. Sometimes they would turn on the radio to listen to the news or songs. Their ride was usually quiet unless Luna initiated some conversation.
"Leon, do you miss home?" she asked unprompted.
"How can I miss something I don't even remember?" he stated, eyes still glued to the road. "Do you?"
"Yes, I do miss my home. I miss the people of our palace and our town. I miss my bed. I miss my sylleblossom," she listed all the things she missed. "I wonder if Maria is watering them regularly."
"Don't worry, you'll be home soon. You just need to finish these trials," he suggested.
"I am not so sure about that. Once the trials are done, I don't even know what will happen to me," she whispered softly, looking in the distance.
"Why do you say that?" he asked. 'Once again, she is talking with a sense of finality. What does she know that I don't? What is she not telling me?'
"It's nothing. Let's not talk about it," she averted, ending the conversation abruptly.
Looking at her pained expression, he decided not to push the topic any further.
Not wanting to spend too much time in public, they had grabbed some food on the go. They stopped by an old abandoned farmhouse to take a break and eat their lunch.
They sat on a broken bench side by side as they unpacked their sandwiches.
"Leon, what's your favorite dish?" she asked, as she carefully took out peppers from her sandwich.
"I forgot the name. It's that sweet you made for us at Lestallum," he replied, carefully picking out olives from his sandwich.
"Memory lane pastry," she recalled immediately.
"Yes, that. It was amazing," he exclaimed, before taking a bite out of his sandwich.
"I am glad you liked it. I will make it for you again," she offered, after chewing.
"You don't like peppers?" he asked.
"I do, but there are too many in here," she stated.
"Pass it on, I'll take it," he proposed.
"What did olives ever do to you?" she asked.
"Just don't like them," he said plainly.
"Can I have them?" she requested.
"Absolutely," he gladly agreed.
"What is your favorite dish?" he asked.
"I enjoy falafel," she remarked, after thinking.
"Your favorite drink?" she asked.
"Pina colada," he replied enthusiastically.
"I don't like it at all," she said immediately. "However, you seem to like coconut-based flavors, don't you?" she remarked, noticing the pattern.
"I guess I do," he confessed. "Your favorite drink?" he inquired.
"Mango shake," she replied gleefully. "Let me guess, your favorite ice-cream is Coconut chocolate?"
"Yes. And yours is Cookies and cream?" he guessed.
"Nope. My favorite ice-cream is pineapple orange. Maria at our manor makes this amazing ice-cream," she recalled fondly.
"You know so much about me and I feel like I don't know anything about you," he stated disappointingly.
"Don't worry, you'll get there," she encouraged.
They finished their meal in idle conversations like this. Once done, they made their way back to their car while having a playful banter. Ever since Luna broke down and poured her heart out, everything felt slightly different. Even though they tried their best to keep everything normal, there was always an underlying pain that accompanied their every conversation now.
Their journey continued as clouds gathered above. Leon retracted the previously open roof back to enclose the open car. Within moments rain started pouring. Luna was busy reading one of the books Lina had left in the car, 'The Legend of Vascaroon'. Leon played some music at a very low volume and occasionally tapped his fingers along with the beats.
She reclined her seat back, taking a break from the reading.
"Coffee?" she asked.
"Sure, but do we have any?"
"I got one can of Ebony Coffee at our last stop," she revealed, reclining her chair back up so she can reach the glove compartment in front of her.
"You are the best. I was starting to feel a bit sleepy," he admitted.
"I wasn't sure if you would like it or not, so I only got one," she said, opening the can and handing it to him.
"Thanks!" he took a sip of it and it was truly great coffee. "This is fantastic, you should try it too," he suggested, offering her the can.
She was hesitant at first, unsure of what to do. There were out of straws and there was only one can. Drinking from the top would be risky in a moving car. After evaluating all her options, she grabbed the can and took a sip from it directly. She had never shared food like this with anyone else before. It felt odd and comfortable at the same time.
But one sip of coffee made her forget all that. "Wow, this is good. We need to stock up on this."
"I 100% agree."
They each took a sip alternatively and quickly finished off Ebony, longing for more.
Longing for something they can't have seemed like the theme of their life.
Author's Notes:
The answer from the last chapter: Lina is a White SeeD who reads book to the children on the White SeeD ship.
This chapter's question: What is significant about "The Legend of Vascaroon" book and Survival knife?
Please leave a comment if you've enjoyed the story so far. I would love to hear your thoughts. Thanks :)