Cyclamen, a flower that means that all good things must come to an end.
Today was the 10-year anniversary of the freedom of Monster kind.
You pretended to forget when Frisk came running to your room, excitedly waking you up before the sun rose. This was their favorite holiday, after all, and it was fun to tease them.
Of course you remembered, it'd been in your phone calendar and you had a reminder set for the past week leading up. It was circled in green and red markers on the mass calendar in the kitchen, where the residents of the house kept adding new little doodles around it. From smiley faces to confetti to abundant exclamation points.
You'd been planning the 10th anniversary celebration for a while. You and the young Ambassador had already discussed with the mayor many months prior to closing off roads for half the town so that the monsters could have a safe free roam. Every year there was a party of so sort, but since the first Anniversary it was mostly the monsters gathering far and wide to crowd the neighborhood Asgore and Toriel lived in. You thought it'd been ten years too long to not make the celebration more official.
Frisk thought so too, which is why they were so excited to get the day rolling. After all, there were a lot of venues to double and triple check before the festivities really began.
"What kinda brekkie you feeling today?" You asked the kid as you strode into the kitchen, still fixing the outfit you had hurriedly thrown on. They already had the stove burning, a carton of eggs on the counter. You finish tucking your button up into your slacks.
"Quick and easy." They signed, before waving you towards the fridge. You snorted as you grabbed the milk and butter they gestured for. When you hand it to them you notice you have to look up to meet their smiling eyes.
The kid had grown. Which was expected, as they were now nineteen and running your town, but still. It surprised you everyday with how old they'd gotten. How tall they were.
You ruffle their bedhead of hair, getting a laugh out of them.
After scarfing down breakfast the two of you pull on winter coats to head out. Frisk pulls on a purple and pink beanie, sending you a wink.
You'd sewn their old onesie into that hat when they got too big for it, but didn't want to let it go. It was funny to see them still cherishing it so much.
The town was quiet, citizens still sleeping or just waking up and getting ready for the day. You and Frisk trekked through the snow into town, forgoing the iced over car.
There were workers out, mostly monsters, a few scattering of shivering orange clad humans, all helping to set up. Most of the larger structures had been set up a few days ago, like the pop up stage and a few kiddy rides. The booths and the banners and ribbons were the main things being put up today.
Frisk makes a beeline to an older woman off to the side overseeing the workers. She was the mayor and she looked happy to see the monsters' ambassador approaching. You stray behind, deciding to forgo listening to the political talk. Plus, the mayor had learned sign language years ago to best communicate with Frisk, so your translator job was minute. Instead your eyes catch a familiar figure and you grin as you walk over to him.
"Darling I asked for a hot coffee, not a lukewarm, poor excuse for a latte that- Oh darling, there you are!" Mid scathing sentence Metatton's eyes happened to glance to your approaching form. The human in front of him, clutching the latte, looked ready to ball as they quickly escaped as the robots attention was taken by you.
"Here I am." You make a mock little curtsy, showing off the suit you adorned. Mettaton hummed, taking in your outfit of choice before finally nodding.
"You are here. Definitely catching the eyes of your people." He hummed, smirking as you frowned.
"They're not my people." You muttered, feeling heat in your cheeks.
"They've been your people for over ten years and you're still trying to make excuses." he gave an exasperated sigh, as if not expecting this conversation to go this way every time he brought it up. Instead of pointing that out, you take a moment to look over his very form fitting and very eye catching choice of wardrobe.
"Ready for your big performance?" Mettaton puffed up his chest, looking proud and smug as he tossed his hair over his shoulder.
"Of course darling. I was made to entertain. This will be my biggest, brightest, grandest performance yet!"
"You say that every year." You note. Mettaton wraps an arm around your shoulders.
"And do I disappoint?" You laugh and shake your head.
As you pull away, you see a figure in your peripheral vision. It makes you jump and spin towards it.
There's no one there.
"Darling?" You blink, turning back to meet Metatton's raised eyebrow. You shake your head and then shrug.
"Nothing. Thought I heard Frisk." You wave him off as you start walking. "But hey, like you said, you never disappoint, so break a leg today!" You laugh as Mettaton does a dramatic bow to see you off.
As you're walking, surveying the speed of setup, you feel an itch in the back of your brain. You pause,deciding to itch the thought. Every year Mettaton did a show for the anniversary. You knew that for a fact. So why couldn't you remember him performing the last couple of years? In fact, you don't remember him performing once in town.
Odd.
You shrug it off as early morning brain fog and decide to get a hot drink to wake you up. Getting off the street you duck into the most familiar building there.
Grillby's is, like always, warm and inviting, and doesn't look a day older than when it magically appeared in town. Other than the new selection of human booze on the back shelf and some updated music choices, the bar looked no different than it did when it was in the Underground.
Though early, the fire elemental was dutifully behind the bar, polishing the counter. When he heard the bell chime and saw you he waved in greeting.
"Morning. Getting ready for the big day?" He laughed, the fire popping. He gestured to the freshly stoked back wall.
"I've been getting ready for the past month." He said, pulling a mug out and stepping over to his industrial espresso machine. You note that it was one of his finer choices of new equipment.
"Haven't we all?" The machine hissed as it began brewing. "Frisk hasn't stopped talking about it for the last half a year. The only thing the kid thinks about is celebrating monster kind."
"They're sweet." Grillby says, taking a glass out to polish. "We're lucky to have them as an ambassador."
"We're all lucky." You say softly. Grillby pulls the coffee from the machines hold. He pours your usual amount of sugar and cream before gently setting it in front of you. He knew you too well.
"Tonight will be busy." He says, wiping his hands. "If you could get away, would you mind taking up a shift with me tonight?" He turns as he stacks the glass and then begins wiping down bottles.
"You sure you want me?" You laugh. "I'm pretty clumsy. I've also never worked as a bartender?" You knew Grillby hid his humor but this kind of joke was new. You blow in your mug as you watch the fire elemental turn back around. He sends you a quizzical look. "What?"
"You worked at my bar for four years." When he sees your brow knit in confusion he steps to the wall of bottles. Above them are numerous photographs. Mostly of regulars, many had been photobombed by Sans, others signed by celebrities (there were many of an signed by Mettaton). He pulls one off, looking at it, and then hands it to you.
You give him another confused look, wondering why he was running so hard with this joke, but then look at the photo.
It was you. You and Grillby, Frisk, Sans, and a few other monsters piled together. You were all grinning like maniacs at whoever took the picture. You notice that Frisk is still a small kid, around the size of Sans. You also notice that you and Grillby are arm in arm, both wearing the uniform Grillby usually wore behind the bar. Under it is a date, January, same year as the barrier falling. It says "congrats Grillby. For hiring me. Congrats on the new bar too I guess" with a smiley face. It was in your hand writing.
You don't remember writing this. You don't remember this day, or this photo, or being hired at the bar.
Your hands shake as you set down the photo. Grillby stares at you as he takes it back.
"Is everything alright?" He asked softly, leaning in as if the bar was full and he was trying to keep it private, trying to make is voice heard. But the bar was empty-
It wasn't empty.
That's a pop in your ears and the world tilts.
Suddenly there's noise and people.
The bars packed and you lurch out of your seat in surprise.
Your chair clatters to the ground, ringing out and stopping most noise in the bar.
"You okay sugar?" Asks Dogamy. Him and his wife look worriedly at you in the bar stools that'd been next to you. The bar stools that had been empty milliseconds ago.
All of the monsters in the bar stare. Panic and fear rise up like throw up in your throat. You gasp for a breath as your vision tunnels.
You take a shaky step back from Grillby, who looks ever more confused and worried.
You run.
You crash out of the bar, gulping a breath of cold, freezing air.
It's night outside.
Night.
It'd been the early dawn just seconds ago. The crowd of monsters move around you, absorbing you into them as soon as you take a step. You bumped between them, forcing yourself back through the current, trying to run and flee from your panic.
You pop out of the crowd near the pop up stage. Mettaton sits on the edge of it, talking to fans all around him. You hear many of them talking about his show that had just transpired.
It had already happened?
You see a figure to your right and you flinch back. When you look, there's nothing. You back peddle and run into someone. This time when you spin there is someone there.
"Papyrus!" You shout as you flatten yourself against him. His arms come around you immediately and you sink into the familiarity.
"There you are!" He squeezed you tighter before pulling away. "Sans and I have been looking everywhere for you." You shakily breathe in.
"Papyrus today has been-I don't know it's been a day. Everything's been so weird and out of order and -"
"I know!" He huffed. "They completely ruined the food items I helped the ambassador order! It would've been a catastrophe if I hadn't stepped in." You try to open your mouth but you stop.
"You're quiet, Papyrus." He wasn't, in fact, quiet. He was still talking above the normal octave that a person should be standing so close, but it was so much quieter than you were used to with him.
"I'm talking like I always do?" He says, giving you an odd look. "Either way, come now, you're missing out on dinner." He takes your hand in him and spins you around to pull you through the crowd.
He wasn't talking in third person, either. When did he start not doing that? What was going on?
Papyrus's hand slips from yours as a monster bumps into you. You squeak when you're pushed back, before lunging to grab the skeletal hand sliding between bodies.
"Papyrus!" You yell as you fall forward.
There's another electric pop.
You smack your head on something hard and stumble back, covering your face.
"Hey kid, you alright? Two heads are supposed ta be better than one, but I'm not sure if bumpin' counts." You rub your forehead before looking out-
It's sunny.
You stumble again, eyes wide and up to the sky. It's mid afternoon, sun high above your head. You blanche as you feel a hand pull at your wrist.
Sans stands in front of you in a far less crowded street, eyes narrowed in worry as you gawk. He grabbed you to help your balance, you you'd almost fallen over in your shock.
It was just night. You were just with Pap. Where was he? Why was-
"You looking for my bro too?"
"Uh, yeah." You look down to see Sans pocketing his hands. He was in his usual large fluffed blue coat, but a cleaner than usual shirt was under it and he even adorned normal, khaki shorts and converses. He seemed to notice you staring and he chuckles.
"Paps wouldn't let me leave till I changed." It would've sounded like a complaint if he wasn't grinning ear to ear with a fond smile.
"He was just here." You murmur, still looking around as your skin crawled.
"Really?" He looked around. "He said something about helpin' with a food delivery before runnin' off."
The streets had monsters but it wasn't packed yet. They meandered in and around stalls and buildings. It wouldn't get packed until Mettaton played or the stalls broke down.
Which had just happened. Already happened? Was going to happen?
Something wasn't right. Of course it wasn't right! Your memory, time… It was all wrong.
"Sans have you noticed anything weird?" You blurted. He looked over to you.
"Weird?" He asked. "How weird?" He snorted as he gestured to a monster carrying blushing humans on each shoulder at one of the booths. You would've laughed if you weren't still panicking.
Sans didn't know about the time you were skipping. You knew him well enough to read, and there wasn't a hint anywhere that he knew.
"Well, Paps'll get home. Was lookin' for you anyways." He shrugged. "Tori's havin' the usual feast at her place and wants your help cookin'." He reaches a hand out. You hesitate long enough that his phalanges curl back.
"I, uh, I can't!" You purse your lips. "I have to find… Find Frisk, first."
Right. Frisk. If there were time shenanigans happening, and Sans wasn't aware, it was probably the kid. He looked you over before shrugging and nodding.
"'kay. I'll help ya. Probably with Paps." You stutter a nod and head off.
You needed to calm down. Deep breaths or whatever. If you kept acting weird Sans was going to worry and the last thing you needed was Sans, the biggest worrier you knew other than Toriel, to get on you.
It wasn't hard to find Frisk and Papyrus. The large food truck and the yelling of Paps was easy to follow.
Papyrus and Frisk were both frowning. At the food delivered and at the paperwork on the clipboard in the kids hands.
"This isn't right at all!" Paps huffed, crossing his arms. It wasn't until now that you noticed the black turtleneck and fitted jeans he was wearing.
"Sup bro." Sans languidly stepped up to his brother, looking over the crates and bundles of good.
"Now is not the time, Sans." Papyrus hissed, running a bony hand over his face. Sans just chuckled and took a seat at one of the semi set up tables.
"Hey guys." You meekly great. Frisk head pops up at your voice and they smile sweetly at you before glancing back to the paper. "What's wrong?"
"What's wrong? Everything!" Paps dramatically shouted. He took a deep huffy breath before he continued. "Only half of our shipment came in! There is not nearly enough food here to feed all of the hungry citizens!"
"Bummer." Sans commented.
"Bummer indeed." Papyrus snapped.
"What happened to the other shipment?" You asked as you walked over to Frisk. They passed over the clipboard as they began rummaging around the food. A few numbers had been missed and reported wrong, it seemed, so the company delivering didn't have as much stock as they thought.
"It's too late to order more." Papyrus said, sighing.
"Why not make some?" You pipe up. You set the clipboard down as Paps and Frisk look to you. "Cook something, Paps, for the monsters. I'm sure with that on top of stall food and the local restaurants there'll be enough."
"I…" He trailed off before his face lit up. "Of course! I am an excellent cook! Why hadn't I thought of that earlier!" He took a step to kiss your head before sharing a look with Frisk. The two excitedly began pick up food they need before rushing off towards Grillby's
"Look at you, savin' the day." Sans said, now next to you. He nudged you gently but you kept staring.
"When did Papyrus stop wearing his battle body?" You ask.
"...A month after we left the Underground." Sans is staring up at you now. You're sure he's caught on that something's wrong. "Remember fightin' bout it? You threw a fit when you saw him take a shower in it."
"...right." You say, as if you remembered. You didn't. At all.
"Kid you doin' alright?"
"Yeah." You lie again, looking away from him. You knew he'd be able to tell. You're sure he could already tell.
"Kid-"
"Sans! Kid! " You sigh in relief as Undyne comes bounding over with a scurrying Alphys at her side. "Haven't seen you two in a while!" She crushes you to her chest in a bone cracking hug. Sans expertly says hi to Alphys first to avoid the greeting.
"I-its beautiful. Y-you and frisk did ver-very well setting up." Alphys complimented.
"It was nothing." You wave off. Half of it was modesty and the other half was that the memory was gone. You're sure you remembered setting up this anniversary with Frisk but now, when you tried to specifically think of the time you spent… It was gone.
"You two are coming to the queens dinner, right?" Undyne asks. "Me and sweetcheeks are making some casseroles and bring the strong wine." Sans snorted at the same time you laughed.
"Ya know, Tori hasn't been a queen for over ten years now." Sans drawled. Undyne made a face as Alphys snickered.
"Wouldn't miss it for the world." You say. Your eyes catch a glint and you look down, spotting a ring on Undyne finger.
"We were bouta head over and help Tori with the cookin'." Sans said.
"Can I make a request then?" Undyne asked you pointedly, smirking.
"Oh uh, sure?"
"No fish." She deadpanned. Alphys snorted and batted at her arm and the two started laughing. It was then you saw Alphys wearing a matching ring.
Were they… Married?
When did they get married?
The question is on the tip of your tongue but you swallow, feeling that panic rise back up into your chest.
How could you not remember when your two best friends had gotten married? You had to have been there, right?
"You don't remember."
"Of course I remember." You snap. You had physically recoiled at the accusation, not knowing how they could've known you'd forgotten. Undyne and Alphys stop laughing and look at you.
"Huh?" Undyne glances at her wife. "It was a fish joke kid, lighten up." She pushes at your arm and this time you give them looks. Hadn't they just….
"You can't remember." This time you're looking between the three of them when you hear the voice again. Your heart takes a swan dive when it doesn't come from them and when they don't react.
They couldn't hear it.
"Kid you haven't been actin' okay since you ran into me. Knock somethin' loose?" It was said as a joke but San's look isn't playful. You try to answer him but you're trapped in your mind.
First the time skipping, then the loss of memory. You'd been seeing things out of the corners of your eyes and now you were hearing disembodied voices?
This couldn't be happening. This had to be a dream. Just one… big... Dream?
Who was that?
A monster stood at the edge of town. As soon as your eyes found him between your friends a blanket of white noise filled your ears. All you could do was stare at the figure. You couldn't look away even if you tried.
Who was that?
You push past your friends. If they said something you didn't hear it. Maybe they didn't even try to stop you. You don't know, you don't remember. You just walked.
When you get to the figure he tilts his head down to look at you. He looms, whether he wants to or not.
The blacks holes in his skeleton head bore through you.
You can't hear anything as you stare.
His mouth moves.
A verbal voice isn't heard, but your soul hears him. Hands appear around him, multiple sets without arms, signing in a language you didn't know.
But you knew.
"Who are you?" You ask. You don't hear your voice but the skeleton tilts its head as if he'd heard you.
You think you hear the whisper of the name Gaster, but his jaw doesn't move.
"You were not supposed to get this far." Black ooze builds in Gaster's eye socket. "You are an error in this universes code. A virus. A… very, very, very interesting one." It drips out. It's thick and hangs before dropping onto your cheek.
"What are you saying?" You whisper, your voice refusing to get any louder.
"You are not supposed to be here." He says.
"On the surface?" You ask and the monster leans down, closer and closer until the bone ridge of his nose is a breath from your own.
"Frisk does not have a sister. Who are you?"
"Frisk doesn't have a-" Just as you glare, feeling a spark of anger-
You blink.
You're suddenly sitting in the dark, eyes burning from staring at a screen much too bright. The thin font blurs in front of you. There's pages of it on the screen, you've been reading it for a while now.
At the same time you know where you are, you don't. Weren't you home?
You are home.
Did you mean where you sit now, or in front of Gaster?
Go home
Go home
Go home
Go home
Go home
Go ho
You hear your name called and you gasp.
Your knees crack as they hit the icy ground, a hand flying to your throat as you struggle to breathe. Fisting your hand in the snow you ground yourself. You're here. At Mt. Ebott. Breathe.
Breathe.
You're home.
Arms surround you and the feeling of warmth, of another body touching you, cements that this is reality.
"What's going on with you!?" Undyne is kneeling next you, pulling you up to make sure that you do get a breath into your lungs. You shake your head, blanking on words, but seeing her, Alphys and Sans close behind, shakes something inside of you.
You start to cry.
Undyne balks, hesitantly patting your back. The pinpricks in Sans's sockets roll as he nudges her aside to scoop you into a familiar hug. He holds you, running his bony hand through your hair, trying to soothe you.
In the back of your mind you're positive that he's done this before. Him hugging you and telling you that you were alright, that everything was going to be okay.
...But you couldn't remember.