I just want to preface this by saying that I have never played poker, let alone dealt a game, so any mistakes I apologize for, usually I would get someone to fact check them but I didn't want to make you guys wait any longer.

Ana's POV-

Spinning around in my dress I make sure that it's long enough to cover everything important because the last thing I need is for a summer breeze to blow up the skirt and I end up flashing everyone. When I brought this dress a few months ago in the sale I don't think I expected to be wearing it for my first date with Christian, hell I didn't think I'd ever go on a first date again. But this is Christian, he isn't some insensitive or insecure jerk who's going to push things too far or be surprised if I say I need more time. Like earlier, with our dry humping, he pulled back despite the fact I know he was as worked up as I was just to check on me, to make sure I was okay. If that doesn't show me how good a guy, he is I'm not sure what will, don't get me wrong I never in a million years could have prepared myself for things to take the turn they did, but I'm thankful they did. I know he was worried I would regret it but in all honesty, I don't, I'm not sure how I could. No one, not even Ray and 'Mone have ever made me feel as safe and as cared for as I did in that moment. I don't think I ever expected my first time, can I even call it my first time if I didn't get naked and there was no penetration involved?

"What you thinking so hard about?" Christian asks startling me from where he's now standing the open doorways. He takes a moment scanning the length of my body taking in my dress, I'm self-conscious but in a good way, like I want him to like the way I look not that I'm worried he may see my scars and be repulsed, I think he proved this morning that they don't.

"Was this morning our first time?" I ask before I can think better of it.

"Yeah, I guess it was."

"But there wasn't any uh… penetration involved." My cheeks heat at the words and I dip my vision until I'm staring at my navy blue strappy heeled sandals, which match the flowers on my dress.

"So?" He says pulling me to him and raising my head so that I have no choice but to look him in the eyes. "Penetration doesn't necessarily equal sex, sure it's how most of society recognizes virginity but there are plenty of couples out there that never have penetrative sex. Some same-sex couples, some of them never actually have penetrative sex even if there are penises involved, some people don't like it."

"They don't?" I ask dumbly not really sure where he is going with this.

"No, look I'm no expert I only know based on what friends have told me. Some gay men never have penetrative sex and they only ever trade handjobs and blowjobs, does that mean that they've never had sex? Or what about two girls, the only way to have penetration is with a dildo if you want to say fingers don't count, but some may say that doesn't count but her hymen wouldn't be intact so therefore not a virgin. But for some that may never happen, especially if there is a physical limitation like disability, really the idea is a social concept that's outdated. I think it can mean whatever you want it to, so it's up to us."

"Okay." I pause thinking it over trying to figure out where I stand on the issue. "I think it was our first time, but I don't know if I feel like I lost my virginity."

"I agree with you there." He leans down placing a sweet kiss on my lips. I think I'd feel different if we'd been naked or if there was any more skin on skin contact but right now, I just feel like that girl in the movies who took a step towards losing her virginity but isn't there yet. Pretty apt really, given I'm kinda afraid this is all a dream and in a minute, I'm going to wake up with Ben drooling all over me. "You look beautiful by the way." He whispers in my ear before placing a kiss just below it.

"You're not half bad yourself." I say giving him the once overtaking in the tight-fitting khakis and form-fitting light blue shirt, somehow it seems to match perfectly with me without us even trying.

Christian drives my car into town, we park up in a quaint little car park in East Hampton, usually, I feel kind of awkward about parking my car in car parks just because it's often the nicest car in the place but clearly we're in a nice part of town because there are more than a few luxury cars parked here.

"This way." Christian says opening my door, helping me out. It's a short walk from the car park to the restaurant, I'm not really paying attention to where we're going until Christian stops telling me we're here. My heart stops when I see the name of the restaurant. Fuck this is bad, this is so bad.

"Ana look at me." Christian's hand guides my face to his and gets me to slow my breathing, once again he manages to stop a panic attack before it even starts. Right now, though I'm once again regretting leaving Ben behind, even though I knew Christian would be okay with him coming, I didn't think I'd need him, I feel safe with Christian and even though that scares me, it's also kind of refreshing. "Wanna tell me what caused that?" He asks no trace of judgment in his voice just a pleading for understanding, he genuinely wants to know so he can help.

"It might be better to just show you." I say pulling him through the open door and into Vincenzo's, stepping up to the hostesses stand. "Hey is Vin in tonight?"

"He might be, depends who's asking?"

"Anastasia Steele." I say not even bothering with pretenses, given the way she asks I can tell what's she's trying to imply. She thinks I'm Vin's sidepiece or one of them at least but what she doesn't know, is that while Vin may pretend to be a player, anyone who's ever met his wife Mia would know that there's no way in hell that he would step out on her. For one she's stunning and he looks at her like she hung the moon, but she wouldn't take any shit and she'd literally cut off his balls and then make him eat them if he were to cheat.

"Alright, give me a minute." She says rushing off to the back rolling her eyes like she knows he's going to say no. He won't.

"I made reservations." Christian says pulling me into his side.

"I figured but I know the owner and if he finds out I'm here and I didn't say hi, he'll be pissed."

"How exactly do you know the owner?" He asks and with most guys, I'd worry they were jealous but with him, I know he is just curious.

"He's Ray's cousin and boss. He's the New York underboss." I whisper the last part because the last thing I need is for someone else to overhear.

"Holy fuck." He hisses and for a moment I wonder, is this too much? Is this the final straw? Will, he finally realizes that this isn't all as simple as it seems, Ray makes it look simple but I'm not naïve I've seen enough movies to know the mafia are serious people and most if not all of what they do isn't exactly legal. I know that Ray shelters me from most of it, but I'm not blind I've seen the seedy underbelly, hell it's how I met Vin.

"Ana." A deep voice pulls my attention and I instantly step out of Christian's arms to the already outstretched ones behind me. He picks me up squeezing me to him, planting a big kiss on my cheek, Vin's one of the few people I don't mind touching, but I think that's just because he's such an affectionate guy anyway. "How's my favorite cousin's girl?" He says putting me back on my feet and I step back to Christian who pulls me into his side instantly despite the fact that he's face to face with Vin.

"I'm good. Vin this is Christian Grey. Christian this is Vincenzo Covelo."

"Pleasure to meet you, Sir." Christian says reaching out to shake Vin's hand, most people cower at the sight of Vin, he and Ray both look eerily similar. Both taller and larger than life, whereas Ray is covered in tattoos Vin has more of a clean-cut polished look, but I guess its kind of required so he can blend in at functions and not come across like the mobster he is.

"You too, kid. I saw a reservation for two under your name, that right?" Vin pins Christian with a stern look.

"Yes, Sir. It's Ana and I's first date." Christian doesn't even blink, only pulls me tighter into his side, Vin catches the movement, I expect him to disapprove because he's somehow even more over-protective than Ray but if anything, he seems to smile.

"I can see that. Come on let me show you to your table." Vin guides us through the restaurant and out the back to the garden, but he doesn't stop at any of the available tables merely walks between them to the raised table at the back of the garden. We follow him up the stairs to the platform, from the ground it seems like you should be able to see the platform from the ground but it's caged in by a wall of vines privatizing the area. "This table do for you?"

"It's perfect thank you."

"My pleasure. You know I'd do anything for you." He says with a pinched smile. "Pick some drinks for yourselves and I'll be back with the main menu." He hands us the drinks menu's before disappearing down the stairs again. I look over the menu more times than it would take most people to read it let alone someone who doesn't drink alcohol when I finally find the courage to look at Christian, he's staring at me.

"I take it he's the Italian mob boss who gave you the car right?" He asks but once again there's no judgment in his tone just curiosity. I can only nod in response, I have no idea what to say, I mean it's not like he didn't know what Ray does really at least partly but it's different to be confronted with it. "What's wrong?"

"You're okay with this?" I ask chewing into my bottom lip.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?"

"I guess it's just different, I mean you know who he is. You're not scared of him?"

"Not really, the guy clearly thinks a lot of you, as do you of him, he hugged you. Sure, I may not agree with most of his practices but clearly, he has more redeeming features that most mob bosses. I assume. I didn't want to hide the fact that we're together because word will inevitably get back to Ray and you know he'd figure out this was a date in a heartbeat. I know what Ray really does, it doesn't take a genius to figure it out and Vin clearly is more involved than him but that doesn't have to define them, just like our pasts have to define us. Please don't worry about it, I promise it's going to take a lot more than this to scare me off." He says as if he's reading my mind.

"Okay." I whisper not trusting myself to speak louder, he squeezes my hand where it's resting on the table.

"So, have you decided what you want to drink?" Vin asks surprising us both, I guess we were so wrapped up in our conversation we didn't hear him coming up the stairs.

"Yeah, I'll take a coke please." Christian asks recovering faster than me.

"I'll have a mint lemonade please."

"Would expect nothing less." Vin says with a knowing smile, I always have one at Sunday night dinner, speaking of which.

"Why aren't you at home, it's Sunday night?"

"We're having at my summer home, Mama wanted it to up here in case you needed any of us."

"Tell her I said hi."

"I will, I'm about to head out, I was trying to get the last of my paperwork done before I head over but if I'm much longer she'll kill me. Speaking of which, I spoke to the chef he's going to cook you guys a couple of specialty dishes on me. What are you guys in the mood for?" Christian looks at me the confusion evident on his face, I nod trying to tell him to just go along with it, this is Vin's way of extending an olive branch.

"Uh… pizza for me please."

"Pasta would be great, I'm not fussy, so anything will fine for me." I know I don't need to specify anything because Vin already knows what I do and don't like.

"Alright. I take it you like garlic bread?"

"Of course, can you really trust anyone who doesn't?" Christian chuckles, he doesn't know how true that is, really this is Vin's way of testing him, he doesn't trust anyone who doesn't eat the stuff. But I think that has more to do with the fact he doesn't trust the Russians and they don't like the stuff.

"You're right there. Anyway, I best be off. I'll pass your orders on, I'll get Marnie to be your server, she's my best if there are any issues you've got my number. See you later." He says pressing a kiss into my hair and shaking Christian's hands before leaving us.

"Who's Mama?" Christian asks once he's out of earshot.

"Vin's Mom but she makes everyone call her Mama, she pretty much fits every stereotype when it comes to Italian Mama's."

"So short, a little tubby, bone-crushing hugs and takes absolutely no-nonsense?"

"Hit the nail on the head. She's the best."

The conversation flows easily all evening, we talk about everything and everything, somehow it feels like we've known each other forever. That's how it's supposed to be, right? The garlic bread is to die for with caramelized onions and melted mozzarella, I know that garlic bread and onions aren't the right things to eat on a date but neither of us seem to care as we devour it. The specialty dishes though are even better somehow, I get some sort of fig and ham concoction on the pizza that tastes like heaven, Christian gets a sort of next-level lasagne and bolognese mix that also tastes like heaven. By the end of our meal we're both stuffed, so we decide to take a walk before heading home, Christian takes me to this little lake, where the ducks are all settled for the evening. We sit down on the bank to watch the sunset, but not before getting ice cream from the truck nearby. Sitting between his legs as we rest against a tree, the last of the sun glimmers on the water, I try to find the right balance between savoring the mint choc chip and not letting it melt before I can eat it.

"So how did you meet Vin?" Christian asks breaking out comfortable silence.

3 years earlier-

I shuffle the cards, spreading them out across the table before I riffle them. I carefully pitch them out to all the players at the table, even though there are six players at the table there are only two players who really matter. Vin, who I found out today is the New York underboss, which is crazy enough in its own right but the other player who matters arguably more than Vin is Ivan. Ivan Vasilyev who it turns out is the head of the Bratva and not just the New York chapter but the whole US chapter of the Bratva. This whole game in itself is surreal without the fact that I'm rigging the game for a man who by every definition of the word is dangerous, like kidnap and murder you dangerous. And here I am purposefully making the man lose more than win which by all accounts is just pissing him off.

"Hey, Doll? I need him or someone on his team to win the next few rounds." Ray's voice floats through the earpiece that lies just beneath my hair although it's one of those fancy wireless ones it's not invisible so I've been careful not to play with my hair in any way because the last thing any of us need is for Ivan or his team to find out it's. I don't acknowledge Ray, but he'll know if I heard him or not when one of Ivan's men wins. Sure, there's no really guarantee when it comes to Poker, you can have the skills to play the game well but in all actuality, it's a game of chance because you can't be sure what cards you'll start out with, well they can't. You can manipulate the game base of what you're but if you're dealt shit cards from the start then you can't really do much with them, therefore, it's virtually impossible to win.

"Blyad!" Fuck! Ivan bites out almost under his breath but its loud enough that I still hear as do most people at the table but only half the table understands what he says. His me and I do but Vin and his men not so much, it's kind of an unwritten rule that neither group learns the other's language, it's a sign of respect I guess so they can have some idea of privacy. Despite the fact they're both aware the other is spying on him and his operation. "O vremeni."

Yeah, I bet it's 'about time' for Ivan given I've cost him the last five rounds. I only know how to speak Russian because my neighbor growing up was Russian, she took pity on me and would give me her leftovers when my parents forgot to feed me or didn't by any food. Guess I'm lucky that I actually managed to pick it up, but it's always like that with me I just tend to have a knack for picking things up easily, languages being an example. Ray's been teaching me Italian; he says if I'm going to be a part of the family, I need to at least be able to cover the basics just in case, I'm by no means fluent but in his words, I'm 'not half bad'. Although I can understand what's being said by both sides of the table, I'm careful not to let either side know I can hear understand what they're saying. I keep my face a blank mask, like a good little dealer, even with the simpering anxiety that seems to always run beneath the surface. You'd think that dealing for such a high stakes game would make it worse but somehow it makes it better, maybe it's because I'm the one that's actually in control. Or maybe because I know that Ray is just a few feet away from me in his office.

"Prendimi un altro scotch." Vin says asking one of his bodyguards for another drink, handing him the empty glass without looking back.

The last of the game goes off without a hitch, I play the game as Ray instructs making sure the rest of the guys at the table win and lose a few as well so it doesn't look like anything fishy is going on. Something tells me that Ivan wouldn't take to kindly if he found out, call it a hunch, but the hand tattoos and the pistol in his waistband I noted when he stood up earlier, don't exactly scream friendly. Vin collects the last of the pot winning the last hand, pulling what has to be close to a million back into his pile, Ivan almost foaming at the mouth as Vin stacks the chips

"Why don't you get yourself a drink?" Ray offers only this time it's not through the earpiece but from where he's now standing behind me, pulling my chair back as I stand.

Behind the bar I use the soda fountain to pour myself a lemonade, I don't bother going back around to the other side because I know that it won't matter because my role here is done for the night. I played my part, I buttered Ivan up after pissing him off the majority of the night so he would be in the right headspace and think Vin has his best interests at heart when we all know that isn't true. Not in the slightest.

Resting on the counter just below the bar top I sip my lemonade, not paying attention to what they're discussing knowing that even if I did understand what they're talking about, it would be better for myself and everyone involved if there were plausible deniability. It's not until a loud bang echoes through the casino floor that I look up at what is going on.

"You son of a bitch." Ivan bites out his thick Russian accent making the words seem even angrier. I duck under the bar not wanting to stick around to see what happens next, I'm just lucky that the bang didn't trigger a panic attack.

"Now, now there's no need to get all crotchety." Vin says completely unfazed by Ivan's temper tantrum. "You knew what would happen if you came into my territory and started trying to push out my suppliers." Vin tuts his words like he's scalding a naughty child not the head of one of the most ruthless criminal organizations in the world. "What did you expect? Me to just sit back and let it go unpunished. You know my reputation and you know that's not my style."

"What do you want?"

"It's not about what I want it's about what I can take from you. Tell me, Ivan, what would your empire be like if I took away your biggest ports? You think you could still sneak in your girls and drugs if you had no access to any ports? I know you're a conniving sneaky SOB, but I think even you would struggle if you didn't have access to New York, Baltimore or Newark." Although I can't see Vin, his tone is so calm I can imagine him lounging in his chair completely unfazed while Ivan sweats trying to figure out how to tell his bosses he screwed up.

"What do you want?" Ivan growls this time.

"I want you to get the fuck out of my city and while we're at it you can get out of Marland and Massachusetts as well."

"What the fuck have they got to do with anything?"

"I've got friends in high places and once again they haven't taken to kindly to your advances either, so I suggest you pack up before someone shoots your sorry ass." Vin says I hear a chair push against the carpet, so I assume he's getting ready to leave which Ivan says something I only just catch.

"Ubey yego seychas." At first, the words don't register with me but when the guy who was tending bar most of the night moves away, I catch the glint of metal in his hand, the words register, kill him now!

It's like the world moves in slow motion, the bartender moves towards Vin, and Ray but neither they nor the bodyguards are going to notice him in time because they're all so focused on Ivan and his men. I look around, my brain moving a mile a minute as I try to figure out what to do, I have to do something I can't watch someone else die. I contemplate jumping across the bar and tackling him, but I won't make it over the bar or around it in time, and even if do there's every chance Ivan on one of his men will spot me and shoot me before I can make it. So, in a desperate attempt, I launch the glass in my hand across the room aiming for the bartender's head, knowing that even if it doesn't hit it's intended target the glass breaking will draw their attention and hopefully, they'll be able to react in time.

"Tutti scendono." I yell telling everyone to get down as I throw the glass.

The glass sails through the air, the last of the lemonade sloshing over the rim. By sheer fluke, the glass actually hits him, not in the head as I intended but the glass shatters against his back throwing him off balance as the gun fires. On instinct I duck down behind the bar, people start shooting but I can't really make out what is going on, it's all too loud. Another loud band rings out, but it's different this time like wood splintering not like the crack of a gun. I gather the courage to peak between the counter and the bar top as all of the motion seems to have to stopped. Sure, enough when I look up everyone is frozen with their guns pointed at each other. There's a broken chair butted up against a wall, I assume that's what's causing the noise.

"The only reason I'm not going to shoot you is that I'm not dumb enough to try and start a war." Vin spits lowering his gun from where it's pointed at Ivan's chest. "But let me make one thing very clear, I will never forget this, so you come into my city or my state every again, I won't hesitate to come after you, truce or not." He rebuttons his suit jacket and runs his hands through his hair fixing his hair from whatever happened while I was on the floor. "And if you ever try to run girls or people through any of the ports in this country, I'll gut you like the pig you are truce be damned. Now do us all a favor and fuck off out of here before I change my mind about shooting you." Despite the fact, his words are calm there is no mistaking the anger behind them, which may be tantamount to the level of self-control he possesses. If someone tried to kill me, I don't think I'd be as courteous as Vin is right now, but I guess that's how he got to where he is. Ivan and his guys all but storm out, I swear if the guy had a tail it would be tucked between his legs.

"Doll, where are you?" Ray rushes out coming around the bar and pulling me into his arms the moment he sees me. "Fuck, you got a set of balls on you." He huffs into my hair and I almost think he's proud of me.

"He's right that took stones, kid." Vin says, Ray puts me down and I turn to face him despite the fact all I want to do right now is fall into bed, I guess the adrenaline is wearing off.

"Uh… thanks."

"If anyone should be thanking anyone it should be me. Thanks, I owe you one." The bartender groans on the floor reminding us all that he's still there, I forgot about him. "Don't worry I'll deal with him." Although he's looking at me, I get the feeling he's talking to Ray, he snaps his fingers pointing at the guy and one of his bodyguards bend over picking him up in a fireman's carry and walks out the room. I know I should probably worry about what's going to happen to him, but he could have gotten Ray killed today and I'm not sure I would be able to handle that. So, I decide to file it away in another folder, labeled 'do not open', just like most anything that comes with Ray and what he really does for a living.

Present-day -

"A week later Vin showed up with the car, he said it was his way of thanking me properly."

"Wow." It's the first thing he's said since I started my story, I just kept going because I was too scared of what his reaction was going to be. I mean it's one thing to know what I do isn't exactly legal it's another thing to hear how dangerous it can be. Sure, nothing like that has ever happened again, I think they all learned their lesson because, despite the fact that probably wasn't the first or last time that has ever happened to Ray or Vin, I think it still rattled them. If I wasn't there that day who knows what would have happened. "They're right you know. You really do have balls. Not even sure I could have done the same or even been able to react as fast as you did." Christian's hold tightens around me.

"I honestly have no idea how I didn't have a panic attack that day."

"Neither do I but maybe that's because you knew that it wouldn't have helped. You're pretty amazing you know that?" He says echoing the words he said this morning.

He pushes me forward and somehow manages to spin me around so I'm in his lap, I straddle his legs so I can take some of the weight off him. His hand tangles in my hair and he pulls me to him, his lips instantly find mine, somehow, it's with even more intensity than this morning. I lose myself in the kiss and the feel of him beneath me, only when a duck quacks on the lake we pull apart as if we've just realized where we are, sure it's late but there could still be kids out, it's the last week of summer vacation after all.

"We should get home." He says but pulls me even tighter to his crotch, his hand firmly planted on my ass, I'm no better with one hand under his shirt around his waist.

"We should." I say but I don't pull back, we just stare at each other trying to catch out-breath.

Eventually, it's Christian who moves, pulling his hands away, I take his lead and get up pulling my dress back into place, but not before he takes the opportunity to place a soft kiss on my upper thigh. He readjusts himself before standing, he can't be comfortable in those tight khakis but it's not like we can do anything about it here. Once he's standing, he pulls his shirt out of his trousers and down over the front to cover the still obvious bulge in his slacks, neither of us a say a word as we head back to the car dropping our ice cream pots in a trash can on the way.

As we drive back to the house, Christian makes small circles with his thumb on my inner thigh, making it hard for me to focus on anything but the movement, thank god I'm not driving. By the time we pull up the house, I'm breathless and squirming in my seat trying to find some relief from the persistent ache between my thighs. Getting out of the car Christian scans the area for something, I'm not sure what but he pulls me from the car happy whatever he's looking for is not there. We rush up the stair and through the already unlocked door, before the door is even fully shut, I'm pushed up against the wall in the foyer.

"Fuck, am I going to fast?" He asks.

"I don't think so." I whisper not sure; I know that what we're doing isn't too much but if this going much further it might be.

"I promise you; I'm not going to undress you until you tell me to or do it yourself."

"Then no this isn't too much at all."

Christian's hands grip the backs of my thighs, lifting me up for the floor, perfectly aligning our crotches. I know anyone of the group could walk in and find us right now, but I can't find it in me to care, the only thing that matters his Christian's mouth on mine and the feeling of his hardness against me. I pull his mouth to mine, my hands in his hair careful not to tug too hard. His hand slides under the base of my skirt, I think he's going to go for my panties but instead he brushes over them up to my waist pulling me tighter to him, so I'm saved from having to decide if I want this to go any further. He pulls away from my mouth as we run out of air, I'm basically panting as he trails kisses down my neck along with soft little nips that set my skin on fire and only serve to make my panties wetter.

"Fuck." I hiss as he tugs on my earlobe with his teeth, with just the right amount of pressure. I did not think my ears would be such an erogenous zone.

"Elizabeth?" A startled voice rings out, my eyes fly open at the now unfamiliar name coming face to face with the last face I expected to see ever again.

Thanks, as always for reading, and thank you for all your kind reviews they mean the world to me.

Once again please excuse any errors, this is self-edited.

I should probably apologize for the cliff-hanger, hopefully, I can make it up to you by having the next chapter up this weekend. I know this one is a little late, despite the fact we're still in lockdown here I've been crazy busy.

I hope you enjoyed.

FearfullyBrave.