She's Worth It ch. 4
My head feels like there's a jackhammer going to town on it, I'm so fucking tired more than I usually am, my mouth's dry as fuck, it's fuckin bright in here but I didn't have the strength to get up to turn the lights so I pulled the sheets over my head. I feel someone wrapping their arms around my waist before snuggling into the nape of my neck and all I could see was a messy mop of blonde hair, shuddering at the feel of warm breath. Wait short blonde hair? Did Brittany cut her hair last night? How did I even get home last night? I don't remember. I pulled the sheets off of my head before shifting to see that I'm not in my apartment or in my bed cause nothing here looks familiar and I'm getting a warm and cozy vibe here as my room, I never get that kind vibe.
I shift carefully to see that it's not Brittany that's snuggling into but Malibu Barbie from last night as a feeling of dread washes over me but I couldn't for the life of me remember what the fuck happened last night although it looks like I slept with Doe-Eyes' girlfriend. I swore that I wouldn't do this type shit again yet I fell into old habits again… wait, her clothes are still on so there's no way that we slept together but where's Rachel and there's no way in hell that she would let me sleep in bed with her girl in nothing but my underwear. I gotta get the hell out outta before the dancer realizes that I'm not home and there's no telling what might happen if she notices my disappearance especially when I'm dressed like I went to the club or something. I shudder at the thought as I carefully untangle myself from the sleeping girl, gathering my clothes and throwing them on then making my exit as I was nearly out the door when someone calls my name, turning to see Rachel standing a few feet away.
"You're leaving already, Santana?" Rachel asked sadly.
"Yeah, I g-gotta go. I'm sure that I've hassling you guy long enough"
"You weren't a hassle and you don't have to leave so soon. I was just making breakfast and you're more than welcome to stay if you want"
"Nah, I better go Short Stack" I said smiling slightly. "See ya around"
I was almost out of the door when Shorty gently wraps her hand around my wrist, stopping me dead in my track as I looked at her over my shoulder and there's something about her eyes, stopping me from leaving. I don't know what it is but I'm blaming on that I'm hung-over from last night as she leads me towards the table then disappearing into the kitchen and reemerging with a glass of water and some aspirin in hand, giving them to me. I popped them into my mouth before draining half of the glass as Rachel comes back into the living room with a plate with some kind of bread or roll and fresh fruit on the side as when I reached to take it from her, she slaps my hand away. She sticks a fork in it, tearing away a piece and brings to it to my lips like I was some weak child or something causing me to frown, crossing my arms over my chest in defiance.
"Santana, you need to eat something" Rachel said trying to feed me again.
"I can feed myself thank you very much. I'm not a child" I said glaring at her
"I know you're not and I apologize if I made you feel that way. It wasn't my intention but promise that you'll eat since I do have to get ready" Rachel said placing the place on my lap.
"Sorry I didn't mean to snap at you" I said in a small voice, looking down.
I don't want her to get angry with me for not wanting her to feed me and hit me since Brittany would if she thought that I was feeling ungrateful for everything that she was doing for me like keeping a roof over my head or sleeping with me because she's the only that wants me in that way. I hear her shift next to me, lifting my chin so I'm looking in the eyes and raise her hand causing me to flinch slightly at the suddenness and Shorty looks at me confused for a moment before placing it gently on my cheek, kissing me on the forehead.
"I'm not upset with you, Santana. You have every right to be a little upset and never apologize for how you feel. I want you to feel like you can express yourself around me" Rachel said smiling kindly.
My breath hitch slightly as I turn my gaze down to the plate in my lap before picking up the fork and digging in. Oh. My. Fuckin God! This is so fuckin good! It's like a fuckin orgasm in my mouth. I didn't notice Malibu Barbie walking in until she groans looking like death before plopping down on the other side of the couch to see that her hair's all mussed up like a lion's mane when Rachel gives her some aspirin which she takes thankfully then pulling her onto her lap. Shorty squeals before struggling to get up but Quinn wasn't having any of it although the shorter girl had a bright smile on her lips and the scene reminded me of the times with Brittany before she changed. I wish that I could have those times but the dancer has to want to change and I don't see that happening any time soon especially when I walk back into the apartment, shuddering at the thought.
"You okay over there, San?" Quinn asked looking at me questioningly.
"Y-Yeah, I'm fine" I said stuffing my mouth.
I can feel her eyes on me and the last thing that I need to be doing is spilling my guts to some random strangers that I barely know cause I don't need them getting involved since I've beyond saving at this point. Rachel kisses Quinn on the lips before getting up to ready for whatever she's planning on doing for the rest of the day leaving me alone with her girlfriend and I don't know how I feel about that as a moment of silence fall between us. The badass gets up, walks into the kitchen then comes back wit two sticky buns in one hand before setting back in her spot as I picks up a PS4 controller and starts playing Dark Souls III wordlessly.
Shorty comes back in the living room completely dressed in a long sleeved dark grey shirt, a black mini skirt, a black beret, and knee high boots with a small backpack on her back as she walks over to see her girlfriend on the cheek before moving over to wrap her arms around my neck briefly. I tried not to flinch this time but I did as Malibu Barbie looks at me outta the corner of her eyes and I knew that she was gonna ask me about that as soon as Rachel left.
"Rest up you two and Quinn honey, please don't spend all day in front of the TV" Rachel said as Quinn merely huffs a little before her attention back. "Hopefully you'll still be here by the time I get back but if not, you can maybe have lunch with me later"
"We'll see"
"I'll take what I can get but we're friends now so I do expect us to hang out, okay" Rachel said smiling.
"Yeah right"
Rachel walks out of the door, leaving me alone with Quinn as the silence fills the living room again and I knew that I should've gotten up to leave but for some fuckin reason, I'm cemented to the couch, fidgeting every so often. Ten minutes past without either of us sayin a word and it was making me fucking uneasy as hell when Malibu Barbie sets the controller down on the coffee table before shifting to face me fully as it was like her eyes was looking at my very soul.
"They're hurting you, aren't they?"
"W-What? What are you fuckin talking about?" I asked frowning. "No one's hurting me"
"Don't lie to me, San" Quinn said glaring at me. "I saw the faded bruises and I saw the way that you reacted to Rachel before I came in and when she hugged you. No one would react that way unless you just don't like people invading your personal space or someone's being hurting you. You have two options: One, you can tell me the truth and let me help you or two, I can start snooping around for answers"
I wrap my arms around my mid-section, pulling my knee up to my chest as it feels like my heart is gonna burst out of my chest and feels like I can barely breathe, rocking back and forth. It feels like the walls are closing in on me and it feel like I have to puke what I just ate as black spots are dancing along the back of my eyelids when the badass comes into my line of sight, taking my face in her hand and her voice is muffled but I focused on it.
She instructs me to match her breathing and it was hard because I was starting to feel light-headed but I managed to breathe on my own and all I wanted to do now was climb into bed, never to come out again as she gets back on the bed, guiding me to lay on top of her. I knew that the longer that I stayed here that the angrier Brittany was going to get but I was too tired to bring myself to care. I closed my eyes for a moment and the next thing that I heard was quiet whispers as I laid still as possible to hear what they were talking about and I knew that it was Short Stack and Malibu Barbie.
"We have to help her, Quinn. Someone's abusing her"
"I know that Rach and I want to help her just as much as you do but we can't just confront her about it. I made that mistake this morning and the poor girl had a panic attack" Quinn said running her hand through her hair.
"What do we do? We can't just stand here and let it continue"
"I get what you're sayin but there has to be a correct way to do this. This is someone's life that we're meddling with, babe but I promise you that we're gonna help her" Quinn said wrapping her arms around Rachel.
I hated that these two are getting involved in my mess and that's what I've been trying to avoid but its happening any way but no, I can't get them involved cause I don't know what Brittany might do if she finds about this. I open my eyes to see that I'm in the couple's bedroom, looking out the window to see that there's a fire escape going all the way down to the ground. I lift up the window quietly before sliding out on the platform as I make my descend to the alley on the building then making my way down the street. I hailed a cab that takes all the way to my apartment and I'm hoping that Brittany was still sleeping off last drinking as I carefully open the door to see Will and Finn passed out on the couch as Schue has his head resting in Hudson's crotch.
I knew that they were gay for each other. I walked cautiously towards the bedroom, opening the door to see that it's completely empty with no sign of the dancer anywhere then the door closes unexpectedly to see her standing behind me with an impassive look on her face while looking me up and down. Before I could do anything about and like a snake, she reaches out and wraps her hands around neck , squeezing my neck as I gasp for air but the dancer didn't let up. I clawed at her hand to get away from her but Brittany pushes me on the bed, straddling my hips as she slaps me across the face then punches me in the face as she unleashes her fury on my body. I cried out for someone, anyone to help but they fell on deaf ears as the tears streamed down my face, lying on the bed in pain as my girlfriend sets off of me as she straightens out her hair.
"I don't know why you make me do this, San. It's like you're trying to make me angry on purpose but if you just do what I say then none of this would have to happen. You know that I love you, baby" Brittany said rubbing my cheek gently. "No one else would want you but me. You're just a whore but you're mine and I'm never letting you go"
She walks out of the room without a second glance, sobbing cause I don't know how I end up like this with someone who claiming to fuckin love me but abuses me so damn much. I curled up into the fetal position, hoping to alleviate the pain and wishing that I hadn't left Quinn and Rachel's place but I shake off of the thoughts because thinking of them isn't gonna make my fuckin situation any better. No one's gonna save me and I'm worth saving. Brittany's right and I'm just a whore for her to use whenever she needs to get rid of the itch. I'm not worth loving and the sooner that I accept the better off I am. More or less
~Nicole The Dragon Rider signing off
End of ch. 4