"Uhd-uhd-uhd...!"

"Psy. Corphish, what are you doing?"

The Ruffian Pokémon glares at his fair-weather friend, the filthy duck who dares to block his view of his prey! He grumbles and shifts slightly to the side, being careful not to fall back into Celestic Pond (is that what it's called? Probably).

"Cor! Begone, you pestilent platypus! I, the MAGNIFICO, have set my sights on that 'saiyan'!"

"Psy-DUCK. Oh, and now you're making up words. Great."

Corphish rolls his eyes and settles into his stakeout. 'Gohan', as he has deduced is the human- I mean saiyan's name, is being trained by the Champion herself (and also her sister)! He must make an effort to be caught by this, lest some idiotic bug catcher happen by and doom him to a career of mediocrity! The duck rolls the eyes of his own, and flops into the pond. He leisurely kicks around, spinning into a laid-back float perfect to watch Corphish's shenanigens.

"Psy duck? What's your plan for if Cynthia sicks Garchomp on you?"

"Phish! Use Iron Defense!"

"Duck psy duck sIGH DUCK. Corphish can't learn Iron Defense, and your moveslots are already taken up by Double Hit, Bubble Beam, Leer, and Knock Off."

"Ccorrroro! Shshshsh! They're doing something!"

...

"Okay, Gohan, Cynthia told me to teach you how to do this – so, uh, here's your Poké Ball."

Gohan takes the orb, looking it over one more time. It looks the same as yesterday when Cynthia showed one to him. He's really going to have to sit down and examine how these work one of these days. "So, I just chuck it at...?"

"Yamp! Yap yap!"

Lucy nods. Gohan mumbles his apologies as the Yamper scampers around in circles, barking excitedly. "H-how do I throw it again?"

"Just like, spin it with your wrist or something! It should be able to figure it out!"

"Okay... here goes!"

*bONK*

Yamper whines as the ball bounces off his head, dropping to the floor. The two children watch the inert ball as Yamper rolls around in the grass. "O-oh, right, I already own Yamper. A Poké Ball wouldn't work."

"Did I at least throw it right?"

"Yeah, sure, whatever. You did great."

...

"COR! COCOCORRRO! You see? You see?! He's already gearing up to catch a starter! That was practice, a practice shot!"

"Psyduck. Delusional as you are, if he is as incredible as you say he is would he not need a pokémon?"

"Cor. If he wants to compete in the Pokémon League."

"... Psy. ... That's valid."

Corphish salutes, twirling around and stretching. Psyduck sighs as he jumps! He dives! Plunging past the psyduck, the magikarp, the barboach and goldeen as he sinks to the bottom of the pond, kicking his scuttley crab-legs as he pumps his way towards his kind.

"CRAW. HELLO, LITTLE CORPHISH. WHY DO YOU RETURN."

"Corrrr-o! I, the Magnifico, have returned to bid farewell to my family!"

The last crawdaunt left in the pond nods, and steps aside for Corphish to make his way into the colony. The bottom of the pond is bursting with life, crab-like monsters scrabbling everywhere! Mm, he smells some whiscash decaying.

"Crrrro! Friends! Family! I have returned from the surface world!"

The entirety of the colony glances towards him, before going back about their business: a relatively small percentage stay and swim in to greet the self-styled conquistador. In sharp contrast to his self-image, the Magnifico is rather an unimportant figure in his community. Tolerated for the amusement he provides, and little else. I shall spare you the details – but let it be known that Corphish the Magnifico made an utter fool of himself in front of his colony, while remaining none the wiser. No learning experiences here.

...

"Okay Lucy, so what now?" he asks her. He turns over the Poké Ball in his hand, still trying to inspect it. "Do I catch one?"

"Uh... no. You have to get certified."

"Oh, all right. How do I do that?"

"You have to go to a Pokémon Center and pick up an ID. You have to be eleven."

The half-saiyan glances around, scratching the back of his head. "I, uh, am eleven. I've been eleven for a while."

"W-what?! Y-you're..."

"I'm older than you...?"

"No! Shut up! Hmph!" she grumbles, twisting away and sticking her nose into the air. Wot a brat. He sighs, and plops onto the ground.

"If you have to be eleven... how come you have Chimecho and Yamper?"

"Because I wasn't the one who caught them! They... they're hand-me-downs. From Cynthia."

Chimecho jingles angrily. Hand-me-downs, really? That's a pretty shitty way of describing your partners.

"... Can I have Yamper?"

"What, no! He's my Yamper!"

"Okay. So can I catch a pokémon?"

"No!"

"... Do you just not want me to catch a pokémon before you do?"

Lucy growls, glaring at him with an intensity he's only seen from his mother before. Jeee-sus christ that's unnerving. He must've been right. It must be perfectly legal to have a pokémon young - you probably just can't use them in cockfights.

"Okay, okay! I'll drop it, you happy?" With this he tosses her the Poké Ball. She catches it, and looks it over before looking back at him with a blank expression.

"... Yes."

Yamper whines and jumps up onto Gohan, pushing him forwards as the corgi-esque creature paws at him ("Yamp! Yamper!"). He lets himself fall to the floor as the dog scampers over him, licking his face as he laughs. What a cute dog! He should have gotten a pet, back home... oh, hey Lucy.

Lucy snorts as she looks down into Gohan's face, covered in dog slobber. Yamper lays on his chest, yipping excitedly as it... makes even more slobber.

"Hey."

"Yeah?"

Lucy blushes a bit, glancing away. "So, uh, here." With no fanfare, she sticks out her hand and tries to return the Poké Ball. He reaches up and takes it. Woo. "You can catch a pokémon if, you, want. I was... lying. You were right. You just need the ID to train the ones you do have."

"I, uh, okay?"

With this... gesture out of the way, she straightens up, turns around, and stomps off. Gohan sits up, catching Yamper in his arms before the pokémon can fall to his lap ("Yap!").

"... She really is a piece of work, huh?"

"Yamp!"

Gohan gently places the corgi on the ground and wipes the slobber off. "You're smart, right? You understand what I'm saying." The dog yips in confirmation. "Huh, okay. Do you know... how I'm supposed to get one of these IDs?"

"Yap!"

"Lead the way, Yamper!"

Yamper yips, but with purpose. It bumps against Gohan's leg before shooting forwards ("W-wait up!"). The two run through the small town, whistling between the buildingsf as Yamper makes a ring around the central depression. The Corgi Pokémon skids to a stop halfway across, sliding to an end before the iconic red-brick building known as the Pokémon Center. He gulps: it only now occurs to him that he still knows nothing about pokémon themselves - he could very well fail to get his ID. Or license, whatever. ... Well, he'll definitely fail if he stays outside. Gohan pats Yamper and tells him to "Run back to Lucy, little buddy! I'm sure I can figure it out from here."

...

So this is the Pokémon Center, huh? Looking around, it doesn't look like much. Pretty empty, even the little lounge area to the right has no one in it. There are some stairs to the left, and a map in the far right corner. Yeah, this really isn't his Earth.

"Hey, kid. You wanna rest your pokémon?"

Should this (according to her name tag) Nurse Cherri be smoking a cigar while on the job? To be fair, it doesn't look like much is happening, but still. She's lounging behind the counter, her arm propped up against what he presumes to be the pokémon-healing-device while she reads a magazine. Other than the computer-looking thing to her left, it's about the only interesting thing in here.

"Uh, no thank you?"

"Really? It's free. Don't even know why I'm here. It takes like, a second."

"Miss Cherri, I don't have any pokémon."

"Huh? Then why ya..." she lowers her magazine, staring him in the eye. "Oh! You must be a newly eleven year-old or somethin'. Yeah, you came to the right place, kid. Better than walking all the way to Eterna City or some crap." She hoists herself off her chair, hacking up a storm while Gohan glances around nervously. Should she really be a nurse? "Upstairs, kid. I'll give ya the lesson and send you on yer way."

"Uh..."

"Up!"

He scurries up the stairs, clutching the Poké Ball he has. Should he have this? Eh, he'll get to use it later, at any rate. Looking around, he takes a seat on one of the beanbag chairs as Miss Cherri emerges from the first floor lugging an... is that a television set. No? It's a minifridge. Why the heck does it have a screen?

"Think fast, kid."

Gohan barely snatches the fruit out of the air! King Kai Almighty, is she trying to earn a citation? ... I guess it's nice that she's providing snacks? The television flickers as she plops into a chair next to him and whips out... a Poké Ball.

"Okay kid, so, like, since you're here in the first place you think you can make it as a trainer. Or at least, you want ta be able to boss around your pokémon while ya walk around outside town. Issat right?"

"Uh, yes?"

"Aight. Just remember that ya should probably make time to do some learning. It's a choice between edumacation and pokémon training out there, kid, both take a lot of time."

"I'll take that into consideration."

"Great, great. SO," she says, lurching up out of her seat towards the minifridge. "Tha first thing you gotta know about pokémon is how to catch one. You gots a mom or pops around?"

"N-no."

"Well well well," she mumbles into her cigar, "you'se got a Poké Ball?"

"Yes?"

"Okey dokey. You find a pokémon you like – and you hit it over the head with a rock or somethin'. It might run away, but if it don't then you got a pretty okay shot at catching it. Get yourself a starter within town, got it?"

"Yes!"

"Aight," she says as she takes out a plate of small berries. "Y'want some oran berries?"

"No thanks."

She nods, seemingly extracting some sage wisdom from his refusal to eat weird berries. "Any-*COUGH*-ways, watcha gotta learn about are stats. You know what stats a pokémon's got?"

"Uh–"

"They got speed, defense, attack, SPECIAL defense and attack, and HPs. They also got 'accuracy' and 'evasiveness' but them can't be vitamined-up. Those all're important, capiche, kid?"

"Okay? What do those mea–"

Gohan is immediately cut off by her half-drunken mumbling. At least she seems knowledgeable on what she's talking about. She... she wouldn't have this position if she was wrong, right? He nods absently along as she rambles on about some things called EVs and IVs and how you got to get pokémon with specific IVs to make them shiny. What would a shiny pokémon do? Blind people? He takes a bite out of the fruit she tossed him–

"Whoah there, kid. Kid! Stop bitin'!"

"Bwuh?" he blinks, confused as she grabs the fruit out of his hand. He crunches what's in his mouth as she looks it over.

"... Huh. You got some dang mighty chompers, huh?" she says as she awkwardly holds the fruit back out for him. He takes it, looking it over... "Them apricorns harder en' steel, they are. How the heck you manage to crunch it up?"

"I have high attack?"

"Aight." Wait, she bought that? That's... okay, then. "So kid... you know 'bout type matchups?"

"No."

"Okay so... all pokémon got a type, right?" This sounds like something actually important... he listens closely, less of his attention being directed towards cracking open the apricorn in his mouth. "All them pokémon you can find in this here town are water types – thas' pretty good, they can learn Surf to carry ya over water. But they'res a bunch more. Pokémon can be any of the... eighteen types, or even two at the same time. Like, gyarados is water and flying type, and that other kid's yamper is electric type, which means it can't be paralyzed..."

He nods along, actually rather interested in the Type Matchup dynamics. It seems like really complicated janken... something he could relate to. Dad always did love his janken. Though, it does leave him with a lot of questions. Are poison types immune to poison in general or just type-based pokémon poison? Same with fire types, electric types, and ice types for their respective 'status conditions'. What type is he – would he be normal or fighting? Or something else? Do types even apply to humans? Cynthia made a point of seperating pokémon and normal animals. Do the dragons grant wishes - heck, are there any actual dragons that aren't just 'dragon type'? And would a psychic type be a match for his own intellectual prowess? ... An IQ of 5000?! Jee whiz, never mind.

"M'kay kid, you ready for your test?"

"Ba-huh? Uh, yes!"

"Okay, er, name all the pokémon types."

He blinks. What? Right now? The look in her eyes... well, she doesn't really look like she cares. Er...

"So, uh, by 'metal' I think you meant Steel and by 'wood' I think you meant Grass. Also you completely missed Ice, Ground, and Normal types. And I think you mixed up Ghost and Dark types."

"So, uh..."

"Ya passed. Congrats. Yer a Pokémon Trainer."

"..."

She then starts hacking up a storm, accidentally letting her cigar fall to the ground before she stamps it out. Geez, she's cute, but good god she needs to get off the smoke. Cherri shoves the minifridge to the side before going back down the stairs: Gohan follows her as she meanders towards the computer thing. "Okay kid, just walk up to the PC." Wait, it's really just called a PC? "It should, uh, make you a trainer card. Just press all the right buttons and stuff."

Huh, all right. Cherri presses a few things on the screen and then walks out of the way. Presumably her job is done, as she hops over the counter back into her seat to resume her reading. Gohan looks at the screen and, glancing around one last time, starts to fill out the information.

Name: Son Gohan

Money: Uh, zero? Zero Poké-Units or whatever they're called.

Region: ... Cynthia said this place was called Sinnoh, right? Sinnoh. Yeah.

Starter: He, uh, doesn't have a pokémon yet. Just gotta clic oh hey, 'no pokémon' is an option!

Started: Oh, nothing to type here. It's just the date. ... July 11th, 2001? This is the future? Over a thousand years in the future, wow. ... Or just a different calendar. That makes more sense.

*CLICK!*

"Agh!" His eyes! Argh! No warning, really?! ... Oh, hey, there's his card sticking out of the PC. He grabs it and inspects it – it looks pretty hi-tech. As he grabs it it shimmers with energy. Man, will this thing update on the fly? That'd be pretty sweet. Hopefully it updates when he catches a pokémon, too.

"Uh, I have my card now. So..."

"Get outta here and getcherself a pokémon. Come back soon."

"All right? See you later."

"Bye, kid."

Gohan sighs, and clutches the card in his hand. Damn, he really should get some pants with pockets. As he opens the door to leave the Pokémon Center–

Wild Corphish appeared!

"GAH!"

"CRROOOOOO—aghk!"

Wild Corphish is blasting off!

Gohan wheezes. Oh god, oh crap, oh jesus, did he just...

"Damn kid, why you even need a pokémon?! You just punted that bugger clear outta town!"

"I... uh... uh...!"

"Yeah, that crawfish prolly fainted dead away. I'd recommend chasin' after it." A quick glance back shows that she's flashing him two thumbs-up: looks like she's taken a liking to him. Heheh, probably wouldn't want to get on his bad side. "See ya, kid–!" is all he manages to hear before the door finally shuts behind him (it took him this long to move out of the doorframe, huh).

The cliff face just south of the Pokémon Center now has a noticeably Corphish-shaped hole in it. The Magnifico twitches at the bottom of it, unable to extract himself as his vision hazes over. The saiyan child takes a few steps from the Pokémon Center, looking back and forth - and causing Psyduck to instantly smack itself against the other side of the building. Kyogre's shit on a stick that kid is strong!

"Ps-s-s-syyyyyy duck... I-i-is Corphish dead?! He can't be dead, can he? He's too stupid to die!"

A quick peek over the side of the building shows that Corphish is, in fact, not dead. The Gohan kid appears to have... smashed the rock face around him and pulled the unconscious pokémon out. And... and tapped a Poké Ball to his head. Isn't that illegal? Whatever, doesn't matter to him. He turns away in a huff as synthetic sound effects indicate the Corphish's capture... Well, he got what he wanted. He doesn't have to stick around.

"Whoah... what're you?"

"OWWWWRD OWRD!"

And Gohan thus loses sight of the the wild pokémon whence it flops into the pond, screaming its ducky head off. He shrugs and immediately turns around towards the Pokémon Center he just left – he has a feeling it might need healing.

...

"Oh, Gohan! You're back. ... Where's Lucy?"

Gohan looks up at Cynthia, and answers with a simple "I dunno." She sighs. Seems like her running off isn't exactly unusual.

"So, Gohan, what've you been doing?" She leans forwards, putting her face in her hands as she looks at him. He scratches the back of his head in a mildly nervous manner.

"Eheh~, I got my card thing." For good measure he holds it up. Cynthia raises an eyebrow at this – she had figured Cherri would blow him off. Ah, well, this is good. "And I caught a pokémon?"

"Really! So, you have your Trainer Card and a starter pokémon?" He nods in confirmation. "You might want this." She smiles and pulls out a gift from under the table – a backpack. Nothing special, really; a few pockets, for everything a trainer might need. Berries, TMs, some Key Items... you know, stuff. Gohan gasps as he takes the backpack, looking it over as he takes a seat. He slips the Trainer Card into it and places his Poké Ball on the table.

"Thank you so much, Miss Cynthia!"

"Heheh, you're very welcome. And please – I'm just Cynthia."

He nods, still grinning from the gift. It's not much... but it speaks for the peoples' kindness. Even a universe away, human decency is an almost constant constant.

"So, Gohan. How about we see that pokémon of yours?"

"All right!" he says, hopping off. He clicks the Poké Ball to increase it to full size, and hopes he's using it right. "Should I say something, or...?"

"Nah, just throw the ball. It should pop back into your hand if you don't jump away or anything."

"Mhm, mhm. Uh... go!" Gohan shouts, throwing the Poké Ball with a flourish. "Core-fish!"

"Whoah! A corphish? That's really cool, Gohan. How'd you catch it?" The Corphish itself grumbles, it's bizarre cry emanating from it's shell as it turns around and looks up at its new trainer.

"I, uh... I kicked it?" Seeing Cynthia's blank look, he adds that "It surprised me on the way out of the Pokémon Center, and I kicked it and then threw the Poké Ball?"

"Okay, that seems a little farfetched. But I'll take your word for it." The corphish looks up at her and blanches for a second, realizing whose house it's in. It then puffs up its chest and starts to howl in that uhd-uhd-uhd way of his– arrogance and logic waging their eternal war, within its enigma of a mind. "Is it hungry? Or... actually, have you checked it's data yet? You might want to learn about it."

"Huh... no, the closest thing I've done is giving it a nickname when the Trainer Card told me to. How do I...?"

"Oh, just return the corphish. You know how, right?" She looks at him expectantly, crossing her arms.

"Uh..." he holds up the Poké Ball, pointing the button towards the crawdad. "Corphish?" It looks up at him, chirping. "Return!" Through an unknown means a red light shoots out of the orb, illuminating his target. Corphish chirps as it dissolves into raw data and spirits into the depths of the Poké Ball. "Now what, Miss Cynthia?"

"Okay... you don't have a Poké Dex, right?" His blank look confirms what she already was pretty sure about. Doesn't hurt to make sure though – maybe Professor Rowan had swung by, you never know. "Let me get out my PC..."

Cynthia takes out a small lap-top computer. "This is my PC... pretty cool, right? Place your Poké Ball riiiight there." He does so, turning it so the button on its face is touching the computer. She swivels the computer around, letting Gohan touch it. "Go ahead, figure it out. You're smart, I'm sure you can do it." With a glance at his Poké Ball, he looks at the PC and starts to figure out how it works...

GOHAN booted up the PC. Which PC should be accessed?

/GOHAN's PC

Accessed GOHAN's PC. What do you want to do?

/Item Storage

/Exit

/Turn Off

Which PC should be accessed?

/Someone's PC

The Pokémon Storage System was opened.

/Move Pokémon

/Party Pokémon

/CORE-FISH [male]

/Summary

/Info

CORE-FISH [male]

Lv. 24

[no mark]

Item : None

Dex No. 341

Species : CORPHISH

Type : WATER

OT : GOHAN

ID No. 45748

Exp. Points : 20

To Next Lv. 10486

/TRAINER MEMO

RASH Nature

July 11th, 2001

CELESTIC TOWN

Met at Lv. 24.

Proud of its power.

/SKILLS

Ability : Hyper Cutter

Prevents the Attack stat from being lowered.

/MOVES

DARK : Knock Off

WATER : Bubble Beam

NORMAL : Double Hit

NORMAL : Leer

/RIBBONS

/RETURN

Continue box operations?

/No

/See ya!

Which PC should be accessed?

/Log Off

"Wow... the Poké Ball can find out all that, just from catching it?"

"Yep. It's how most trainers know how to start using a newly acquired pokémon - for example, it showed us that Lucy's Yamper knows Tail Whip."

"Nice! How can... uh... what do I do now?"

She smiles at him. "Well, I suppose you could start your journey. The nearest gym is in Eterna City across the mountains: but of course, it doesn't matter which badges you have so long as all eight of them are official. An acquaintance of mine, Ethan, entered the Ever Grande League with badges from several different regions. Just please let Lucy catch up with you once she leaves on her own."

"All right. Come on, Core-fish!" he says, looking down at the orb containing his new companion. "We're going on an adventure! One where smarts will be more important than brawn!" Having said such, he confidently strides out of the house, unaware of the amused smirk he has left on Cynthia's face.

Starfie, or Alolan Cleffa

Class: Cryptic

National Pokédex Number: Unconfirmed

Egg Group: Fairy, suspected

Transformations: None

Type: Normal/Psychic or Normal/Fairy, suspected

Height: 0.3 m

Weight: 5.5 kg

Stated to be a possible relative to the clefairy line, this pokémon has never been officially documented. However, rumours about it circulate widly throughout the more remote parts of the Kanto, Johto, and Orre regions. It is said to resemble a star, with a cone with a bulbous growth atop its head and... a generally cleffa-shaped body. The mystery may be answered soon – former Ever Grande Champion, Brendan, claims to have caught one during his travels.