I don't own digimon.

Chapter 24

Are you a boy or a girl?

Bubbles was in no way the sharpest blade in the sword stand. If he wasn't, then Carinamon wouldn't have been able to easily lead him over here to the graveyard. As narrated by me, a supposed 'bag of dicks'. Nothing really gets me down. Unless it's on my end. That's a far different story.

Nonetheless, we (Bubbles, Phusitmon and Carinamon) find ourselves in the graveyard. Graves are still unmarked and the sound of earth being moved echoes about. Talk about a lucky shot in the dark or something.

"Princess?" Bubbles called out, scanning the area for his princess. Even when she wasn't in her dress, Madame was pretty easy to find. Though with all these gravestones, this advantage was mostly nullified. "Princess!"

For a brief moment, the digging stops and the sound of possible panic echoes through the graveyard. But it is too late. Bubbles was making a beeline right towards the source of the noise with little sign of stopping. Which judging by the hole that's currently being dug by our thief. Which was where the little dragon found his most favorite person. Kollmon stood guard, though she didn't have enough time to really warn her.

"Oh." Madame muttered, setting her shovel down for the moment. The bodies of her maids from the other day lays patiently. Rewarded with eternal rest, they just need to be buried. Her focus isn't even on Bubbles currently, debating her options for the possible mess she had created for herself. "Uh… How did you sleep?"

Bubbles looked towards his guardian, confused. Sure, he had heard Blaze and his boyfriend getting drugged by her, but that couldn't be true. There had to be another explanation for this. Right? Madame wouldn't double cross him for such a selfish reason.

"Drug?"

Carinamon let out a chuckle. He hadn't expected to his captor to be so direct. If he was lucky, these two would fight it out and he could just book it. But for the moment, he focused on whatever was going to come out of the thief's mouth next. Just in case.

"Yeah… that." Madame muttered, gaze finally on Bubbles right now. "I needed to grab my whip and I uh…"

Madame looks away, whipping the ground right after. But Bubbles was still standing there. Phusitmon gets down, inching his way towards the grave. Time for the big guns then.

"And you thought drugging the five year old because he would just follow you was somehow a good idea?" Phusitmon accused, gaze split between Kollmon and Madame at the moment. Normally, he preferred to avoid conflict and let his partner do most of the talking. But right now, it was unlikely that Bubbles would actually get through to the thief. So he was going to step up for him.. "Can you at least try to be a team player for once? At least for Bubbles sake."

Kollmon rolled her eyes, claws slashing into the side of a body. Mumbles of her strange speech pattern pierce right on through. Nowhere near the level that they can actually be heard on my end. Too cooperative of a move for the moment. A pattern of sorts, if you want to call it that.

"Like, that's what I told her!" Kollmon countered, Bubbles finding his way over to her. Very carefully, he gave the mole digimon a hug. Nice effort, even if he was still holding Carinamon at the moment. "Oh my gosh! Isn't that like the Artasan guy's scorpion?"

Madame held a hand to her forehead. Kollmon just had to flub it at the last moment, didn't she? Just the simple act of keeping herself straight and maybe try to stay on her side for once was just too difficult. Because of course it was. That just had to explain the string of bad luck over the past couple days she had been having. Just had too. Though if Bubbles had gotten the Artisan's scorpion, maybe they could use that to their advantage.

Carefully, Madame got out of her hole. Did leave the shovel down there. Possible plans for when things go wrong? Could be. Or perhaps she plans to finish this job after this.

"May I see your friend?" they inquired, getting a confused look from the dragon. "I won't hurt you again. I promise."

The words roll out, registering just a couple seconds later. Quite a lofty promise. Especially when you have a habit of being less than honest with people. Good enough for Bubbles.

"Okay!" Bubbles answered and handed Carinamon to Madame. Turning to his partner, it was the rabbit digimon's turn to be carried. Not that Phusitmon seemed to mind. Even if Carinamon looked a touch jealous right now.

"So you're the one who went through all that trouble for just one measly whip." he muttered, getting an eye roll from Madame. "If I didn't know any better, I would've thought you were part of Dist-"

Madame smashed the scorpion digimon into the dirt, rubbing his body about. Just for good measure.

"I want to make one thing crystal clear to you, ruffian." Madame barked, hands curling up in anticipation for her opponent's counter attack. When no such attack came, she carefully picked Carinamon back up. Did grab his stinger as a precaution. "I am not on your side. My actions might make it look like I am, but I assure you. I. am. Not."
Her passenger let out a chuckle as Bubbles and Kollmon focused in on her. That was to be expected though. The actions taken yesterday did not paint the best picture of her goals, for better or worse. Even more so in regards to our little dragon. Even as he hung over her head as some sort of strange temptation, Madame was confident in finding a solution.

"Like, for real? Because you seem like a soco, a socco… a sociopath." Kollmon countered, inching a bit closer to the hole at the moment. Uh… what's that, exactly? Outside of sounding less than great. Got that part loud and clear. Wait… Social means talking. Path probably doesn't a path literally here. Probably, in the more figurative sense.

"You do realize that your partner didn't understand what you just called them." Carinamon countered, gaze on Kollmon for now. "Or is your brain just as bubbly as your body?"

Kollmon flashed a claw at the scorpion. I don't think it quite had the desired effect she was looking for.

"Like, that's not true." she muttered, receiving a head pat from Bubbles. While the gesture helped her emotional state, the mole digimon was still pissed. So what if she had just confused Madame. At this point, she brought this on herself. Or themself. Whatever the heck they wanted to be called. "I'm like totally, totally... smart!"

Madame just rolled her eyes. This was exactly what she was talking about. Sometimes there was something insightful. Other times, nothing but dead air. No happy medium seemed to exist with her.

"Prove it." the thief remarked, turning to face her partner. This should put an end to this. For good, hopefully. If not, she could use this opportunity to truly take control.

"Your hair isn't yours, nor are those tits." Kollmon countered, pointing towards Madame's chest for the moment. Uh… you're playing with fire. Especially since the only way to find out is for our thief to change out. Unless… they don't know how too. Always a possibility. Had to teach a couple people how to take their robes off the other day. A lot of people have conditions that aren't quite visible. Sure, wizards aren't quite the most observant of people, nor are we good at serving as counselors. That's what warlocks are for. What? Everyone assumes that they're melodramatic drama queens with a tinge of the devil. And some of them are. The academy mostly hires those chosen by archfey. Okay, they weren't quite given the choice of patron. Though one or two that I've had the pleasure of working with had said they've seen a beautiful woman in a winter wonderland. Something about sitting in a simple chair, succubus sitting in her lap. Sometimes they're dancing. Other times, just sitting. Quite a looker. But taken. Not that I would really know in regards to love.

"Hey, that would be kind of funny." Carinamon announced, getting a look from both Madame and Bubbles at the moment. Might want to keep that mouth of yours shut. "The girly girl turns out to be a guy all along! Who would've thought that"

Madame froze, gaze sitting firmly on the dirt. Had everything she had believed been some big old lie perpetuated for her ancestors sake. That couldn't be it. Her partner had to be lying out of her ass at the moment and was trying to throw shade onto her face. So she took a deep breath, grabbing hold of a claw from Carinamon. If this didn't work, then this was a mystery they would have to solve some other day. Just in case, she motioned for Bubbles to come over.

"Princess?" Bubbles inquired, watching his guardian take a deep breath and sit down. Their gazes met, needles in her head. "Help?"

Madame nodded, already feeling the little dragon grab hold of their hair and pull. It hurt quite a lot. Not that this was stopping the thief from running Carinamon's stinger across their chest at the same time. Initially, it's just a single slice. The second round though, the result is crystal clear. A pair of breasts fall right on out. Which I'm for certain that is not how breasts work whatsoever, I think.

All while Bubbles tries his best to heal the holes in Madame's head. Maybe that will get her some proper locks of hair. Okay, that's just wishful thinking.

"Holes." Bubbles inquired, hard at work with his healing touch thing. Sure, he had seen the pair of mounds fall to the ground. But that was the least of his worries. These holes had been done quite sloppily. The fact that Madame hadn't gotten something bad as a result of this was nothing short of miraculous, but that just brought further questions. "Princess, alright?"

Madame's expression remained unchanged. While having the holes in her head fixed was nice, that didn't change the fact that her partner was right to an extent. Also made Kollmon actually smart. Supposedly. Okay, I will concede that fact is a bitter pill to swallow. Maybe there's a grain of truth to it.

"How do you know Madame's breasts were fake?" Phusitmon remarked, Kollmon looking out into the sky. For a few minuscule seconds, the mole digimon is no longer in the graveyard. Instead, she was standing in a sterile room with a bunch of people. Standing around a table, there looks to be strange round things similar to the ones that Madame now formerly sported. It all felt so familiar, but somehow not at the same time. People were talking, of note was a woman with quite impressive mounds. Like seriously, those sure as fuck aren't natural. Not one bit. Blonde hair and blue-eyed, a ring hung from her finger. Quite pretty, a sign of something maybe? As quickly as she found herself here, it's back to reality and the cemetery. "Kollmon?"

The mole digimon's gaze swiveled back over to Phusitmon. A deep breath, which looked to be more of a sigh in that moment. After, she scooped the false boobs up. Safekeeping? Yeah, just in case her mistress wanted to wear them. Though, I think that's quite unlikely at the moment.

"Yes?" she answered, trying her best to think up a reason on the spot. This felt like something the mole digimon knew like the back of her ha- I mean paw. Keep forgetting that they aren't humans. "I guess I've um… seen a lot of those in the past. I think."

Phusitmon nodded, taking her answer with a huge grain of salt. Right after, their gazes were back on Bubbles and Madame.

The last of the work had just been finished by the little dragon, his attention turning to the thief's chest. Holding a paw out, he pulled it away at the last moment. Madame's chest needed to be examined, but not by him. He was a priest for a possibly dead goddess. This required someone with a bit more medical know-how. So he let his focus stay on his guardian. But who exactly could they go to? Sure, there was Yvonne. Ella even, but they probably had their own share of problems to be dealt with. Maybe that Dave guy? He seemed like someone who had some idea, even if he didn't really know. Wait. There was those ladies at that restaurant. Maybe they had some idea of what he could do in this moment. Even if the one seemed insistent on serving goop to Madame. Quite rude of her. Couldn't she see that

"I'm guessing you want to take me somewhere?" they inquired, seemingly fine with their lack of bust for the moment. Probably feel just a touch lighter. She was still hanging onto Carinamon, somehow. Whip too. Don't want a repeat of last time.

Grabbing hold of Madame's hand, he pulled them out of the graveyard and towards the Shaky Walls Cafe. Considering that there isn't really any other

"Sorry." he whispered, giving their partners a chance to catch up to them for the moment. Then he's back on "Still friends?"

Madame looked away. While sure, the whole mess with the whip could've gone a heck of a lot better. She was going to need a change of plans. Or in other words, maybe working with people this time around. Not much of a choice here.

"Oh my. Look who got their butt dragged in." Marigold announced, making her way over to the pair. "I guess you see what you are now."

Madame rolled their eyes. The last thing they needed right now was this mess

"Could you just hold this stupid scorpion for the moment and get us some actual food." Madame barked, taking a seat. Bubbles joined them, their partners bringing up the rear. "And it better not be a plate of goop."

Marigold nodded, making a beeline for the kitchen as her customers took a moment to take a deep breath. The last couple minutes had felt like a crazy blur, almost impossible to really believe in this moment. That had really happened. Was her entire life really just a set of really well told lies that everyone had taken at face value.

"Madame?" a voice announced, Blaze and Dave approaching our duo. They look to be an alright mood, the fatigue of the fight with the Artisan still clearly on their faces at the moment. No sign of a weapon being drawn. So it isn't all doom and gloom. Even Dave still hasn't gotten around to trying on his other outfits. Tomorrow. "Uh… What happened to you?"

Madame looked away. How were they going to explain this fucking mess when they had no real way of explaining it themselves? Just make something up? No, that would be perpetuating the mess that they got into in the first place. Tell the truth? While that might get them some good will, would that really be their best option at the moment?

"Things that I thought were true turned out to not be." Madame mumbled, looking down at the table. "You can laugh if you want."

Blaze looked away, hand going to his scimitar. But no blade is facing down Madame moments later. To some extent, this is just one more mystery on the massive pile they were making. Sooner or later, it was bound to balance out and they would be able to get to the bottom of this. But that would come later down the road.

"Could I get a little help here?" the dancer mumbled, turning to Dave. Oh right. LGBTQ. Yeah. This might be something better explained by him. So the maid gave a nod and sat himself down at the table.

"Uh… hi." Dave greeted, getting a look from Madame. While unlikely to recognize him at the moment, it was worth a shot of getting to the bottom of this. "I'm guessing you're Madame?"

Madame nodded, Bubbles finding his way into their lap. At this point, such comfort was kind of necessary.

"What about it?" they remark, getting a look from both Kollmon and Balamon at the moment. Not the worst people in the world, but that wasn't really saying much right now.

"Blaze just wanted to make sure that you're alright." Dave finally answered, bending down slightly to be around Madame's level. Not sure if the thief really appreciated the gesture though. Seemed more frustrated than anything right now. Not that I blame her for feeling that way. Whole world just went upside down and there's no real way of flipping it right side up. "You're outfit is messed up and you're running around with your chest exposed. Did something happen?"

Silence fell over the thief, tears beginning to run down their face. The words refuse to exit from the mouth. By force, it all comes out in one burst.

"Idon'tevenknowwhoIam."

Notes:

I'm back! Now that's my big project for AWC is now done, I feel refreshed and ready to get back to work on this. Though, that did mean having to com to this and trying to decide how I wanted the scene at the end. After his battle with the artisan, I doubt our dancer would want to cause any more trouble. Though, I don't think there was much Dave could actually do.

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Next time: Rantha tries to find a suit. It's more likely than you think.