He watched Nina walk back to the car. Hands in her pockets and her long black hair waving in the post rain wind that had been blowing strong in the last few days. She had a small concerned nod in her face that made him huff and slide down in his seat. She had Gavin, Mac and who knew what other people were in her life, plus and most recently him and this girl. How could she care for so many people at the same time? It seemed tiresome for him. And above it all she was sweet, even when she raised her voice to him a few days ago there was a fragility there, a tenderness. He felt himself be played by those as if he could only watch as she got what she wanted from him. She was no saint despite her sweet face.

"You good?" No would've been his only answer, he went with nothing stead. "The couple said that before Saskia ran away, they were already thinking of taking her in, if it ever came to it, they want to keep her now. I want to trust them but I'm still gonna pass by the house every now and again to see how things are going for her." She raised him an eye brown, His response was still nothing. If the little girl was ok, he had nothing left to say. He just wanted out of there as fast as possible.

…

Nina's spare bedroom was in the end of the house's hallway, the last room in it. It wasn't far enough from the kitchen that he couldn't hear just about every move the girl took in there. She was cooking now; he smelled of a variety of spices he couldn't name and meet in the fire. She dropped vegetables in the boiling water. It all filled up the room while he set in the edge of his bed. Just hoping it could drown the sound of the child's speech still playing in his mind. The oven open and closed, he closed his eyes, she hummed a song, it was a slow, dragged melody. The words mashing into one another like a monastery's chore. It did nothing to help calm his mind and soon enough he was far away from the room, far from that time. He remembered rain and solitude. He remembered longing, missing people he didn't know, not now at least. Then fear, the cold sprinkles of light rain in his face as he charged full speed in the enemy.

The year was 1943, it was his first in the front. He was in Italian territory; he remembered clearly a younger privet, a Scottish boy, he would always whistle such songs before they follow to battle. The kid didn't even realize he did it, James suspected. They were Celtic lullabies; his unit was almost all American, the boy explain it was the only reason he would sing such songs out laud. They were various but their melody unmistakable so was the anticipation they brought him. Another note and he was ready for war, the memory didn't stop at the quiet moments before the fight, he was back there, there were canons, gunfire. There were man falling, the pour willie, with his songs, his memories of home, fell too. Shot once to the head and he was gone. No warning, not then, not now. James was on his knees, shaking and sweeting. It was what he was most afraid of; it had to be her, it had to be this house, this life. He felt safe there, even if just a little it was enough. It was the clearest memory he had. His body felt weak, if this happened again in a fight, he would lose his mission.

…

A string of letters and numbers went up in Gavin's screen. He was asked to pay off the favor the European Rising Tide did him, with information about Colonel Anton Vasleiv. He just needed to do some decoding of S.H.I.E.L.D. files; he was almost done with that when he heard a loud boom from the fire escape, like a car had dropped there. He almost spilled coffee all over his keyboard getting up to check his window.

"James! What are you doing here?" he blurted out excited to see his old war hero. "I thought you and Nina were looking for that girl."

"We found her, this morning. I wanted to know about the bugs, did you get any other recordings?" He said looking again at the airplane models over the dresser.

While Nina was away in LA, Gavin brought James over to the old apartment he where he had been leaving with his mom ever since she got sick, little over a year ago. They spend an evening in the apartment spying on the hydra agents. Gavin attempt to hack into the real state building software, I didn't really work. Their documents were filed under layers and layers of encryptions. It could take months to crack it all; he decided to just drop it and ordered pizza. James got particularly interested in the models. A few of them were classic aircrafts. James vaguely remember flying one himself; he remembered been taught by a pilot reckless enough to let James pilot it, after just some quick instructions. He couldn't remember the man's name but he gave Steve his shield and was incredibly confident of his skills. he mentioned been the best civil pilot in the world.

"Bucky, you didn't tell me what you liked about those so much models" James turned around without meeting Gavin's eyes. "Sorry, I didn't mean to call you that, James, you have to tell me, you ever fly in one of those?" He smiled a little, he had developed a soft spot for the guy's ever-present excitement.

"Piloted actually, I might have learned years ago, I think."

"You're awesome, man. I've got one new recording from those same guys speaking in German again. The rest is just business stuff, they're really running a real estate firm for some reason."

"Best way to make something sound legit is if it really is, I guess." he said turning from the models.

"Does Nina know you're here? Bet she's cooking she does that when she's done looking for something or someone."

"I don't think so. We finished with the girl but there's still Hydra after me, I'm making things worse for myself staying here... And for her too. This is all a bed idea and I should leave."

"Ha! When is it not a bad idea?" Gavin said with a humorless laugh "It was a bed idea to help me, I was arrested twice before I turned eighteen, she still chose to be my friend anyway. When we met I was always getting in fights I couldn't win, got myself near dead a couple times, so Nina… she said that I should train with her, that if I could beat her I could beat anyone, that was over five years ago. I still can't beat her but I also don't want to fight anyone else. Between her and the Rising tide, I got purpose."

"That's not the same thing as people wanting to kill us."

"That's not a first either. Just ask her about Bruce, she convinced him to get out of this gang and his old boss, Jefferson, wasn't too happy about it. He sent guys to kill her. In the and not only she sent then running back to their mothers, she convinced Jefferson Bruce was more useful as a layer than some dumb gang member. What I'm trying to say is she's not a dumb girl and she's a good judge of character, If she is putting so much time and effort into keeping you around, I think she decided you are worth the risk. I say you should trust her."

"Send the audio over to Nina, I'll translate from there."

"Where you going?"

"I'm coming home."

…It was late at night when he made it back to Nina's place. He walked inside without a noise; he could see the counter from the entrance. There was an opened bottle and a glass of wine there, she was still at the kitchen that now smelled like dinner.

"You missed lunch, I decided to make a beef wellington for dinner thougth, it's my favorite food. My mom used to make it every year at my birthday." Nina shouted from the kitchen, she didn't need looking to know there was only one person that could walk in so quietly. "Can I ask where have you been?" She asked sincerely popping off from the kitchen.

"You were singing a sing earlier, it… it reminded me of when I was in Italy for the first time. Someone I knew there, he used to sing songs like that, Celtic songs. Then I remembered feeling… responsible, for him and for the other man there. I've been felling that way again lately; for that girl earlier, for your friend Gavin… for you."

"I notice, I can tell you care, even if you're trying not to because of, you know Hydra and everything. Just don't think we can't handle ourselves while you are here. We're careful, and I know it's taking long but I get it done, I can promise you that."

"Nina when it's done… I'll have to go."

The girl met his eyes. She tried to undo the puzzle that he was all at once as if that was her last chance, as if he was leaving tomorrow. He had large blue eyes, narrow, focused... soulfuls? His posture was rigid, built... uneasy, maybe he was waiting for a scolding, a punishment from outer space. He was a walking contradiction, for Nina, it kind of made him look like a miracle.

That punishment he was expecting never came. She just leaned forward, and kissed him, gentler this time, he kissed her back. He had meant it earlier, he sure wanted to do it again, no turning back this time. He wasn't going to lose it, he wasn't going to lose any time ether, he wouldn't have much of that. When she felt his hands go down the leggings she was wearing, she remembered they didn't cover her ass all the way she smiled before another soft kiss, their mouths fit perfectly together, her dinner would have to wait he wrapped his arms under her tights and took her away.

Her bed had soft blankets where he dropped her body that bounced a little on the mattress. He followed her tracing the skim in her chest, neck and face with his lips. Their lips met one more time as she slipped her hands under his shirt pulling it out of the way, revealing his metal arm and the scars around it. He stopped a second, face turned dark and gloom. Nina knew signs of abuse and she sow it; she took her own shirt off without a word. Light in the room was dim but he still saw the end of three long cuts around the left side of her ending a few inches of her belly bottom.

"I don't mind your scars if you don't mind mine." he ran his flash fingers over then.

"Your Dad?"

"Yeah, and yours, they are from Russia right."

"Some."

"They don't make how we are. we make who we are."

"Do you know that... Are you sure?" he really was asking, maybe she had a different answer then what his nightmares would tell him.

"I'm sure. Who do you want to be James?"

He gently pushed her body down until her head touched the pillows. Using both his hands took her paints out and opened his own.

"I just want to be inside you."

She nodded a soft yes with her head, James dived in her neck burying his lips and nose there. She shook a little as he inserted himself on her. She felt his body, it was a little hotter than usual, she could tell how careful he was not to hurt her. He moved soft and sweet; she would have him this way for now. She would have him anyway he wanted, anyway she could.