Every time Edelgard accidentally brushed again her Byleth was completely sure her skin was going to melt off from the heat. She didn't need a tour, she knew the monastery better than Edelgard at this point, but she followed the imperial princess around nonetheless, listening with a stony expression because she knew any other kind of facial expression would just result in an assault of nervous smiles and giggling if not some awkward half grimace. And really, no one wanted to see Byleth's reputation crumble like that, least of all Byleth. So following around Edelgard like a lost pup was the most she could manage.
Following around Edelgard like a lost puppy while listening to Sothis' constant beratement, that is. "You're far more like a lost kitten," said goddess drawled, seeming all too amused with the situation. "You fall asleep in random patches of sunlight, have fish for every other meal, and hiss whenever a stranger tries to touch you but would melt into a puddle of purrs if Edelgard ran her fingers through your hair. Or touched you literally anywhere else for that matter. Yes, I believe you share much more likeness with a kitten."
Shut up Sothis.
"Tell me, Professor, have you ever ridden a Wyvern before?" The question came from Edelgard's mouth. Byleth, taken off guard by the seemingly random question, nearly flinched but just barely kept her composure. It wasn't good for her to be this distracted. She'd managed to completely tune out the actual words Edelgard was saying in favor of just watching her mouth move. What were they talking about? Okay, they were at the stables, Edelgard mentioned Wyverns, okay. Okay.
"I have," Byleth managed two words. That's all. Two words. She was worried her voice would crack if she said more.
The corner of Edelgard's mouth twitched, though Edelgard kept up her careful mask. It wasn't the good kind of twitch either, like when she was trying to hold back a smile. It was irritation, or perhaps more accurately, disappointment. "Are you any good at it?" The quizzing continued. Byleth couldn't tell if Edelgard was trying to prod for details regarding the mercenary's past or if she was trying to measure the merits of recruiting Byleth.
"She'll be more impressed if you tell her a story instead of just two words. Why not regale her with stories of your own teachers?" Sothis said, pulling up their join memories of the woman who taught Byleth how to ride wyverns bareback in a pinch. The proverbial shove was enough to get rid of the tightness in Byleth's throat and loosen up her words. It didn't really help to loosen up her facial muscles, but it was a start.
"When I was younger my father and I traveled a lot. We made friends all over. One of these friends who lived in Ylisse asked us to go with her to Valm to help settle some... issues, let's say. Well, this friend introduced me to a woman who was an expert wyvern rider. My father had a deal system of sorts, he'd give a discount on our typical rates if the customer could teach me a skill I didn't already know. The problem they were asking us to deal with would have been substantial, too much money for the people asking for our help, so the wyvern rider offered to teach me how to ride. I still have the scars from when I was just learning." Byleth actually remembered the event rather fondly.
"She was a strange woman, but not at all a bad teacher. Though she did have her quirks. She said either I tamed a wild wyvern or I got no wyvern at all..." Byleth had learned how to ride wyverns from the madwoman by the name of Cherche. She who thought spikes were cute and battled her own wyvern for dominance when she was younger. If Byleth was to learn properly, she'd have to get her own wyvern in Cherche style. It was both a blessing and a curse Byleth later learned.
There were few things more powerful than the ferocity and loyalty of a tamed feral wyvern. The wyverns bred from use in the army (as well as the pegasi) were by Byleth's own experience more apathetic due to the fact their masters could easily change classes and a new one would be thrust upon them. They were glorified tools of war. So some of the loyalty was bred out in favor of them easily being able to adapt to new masters.
Wild wyverns and pegasi, both of which Byleth had experience with, tended to not only be more ferocious but exceedingly more loyal after their favor was earned. Byleth's wyvern, Avalon, was the only wyvern Byleth would ever ride. The same thing could be said of her personal pegasus Astra. Perhaps she'd get ahold of the friends she had caring for the pair and have them both sent over. The con when it came to ferals was the fact you needed to earn their trust, which was a different process for each of the priorly mentioned mounts. If it was a wyvern you wanted, there was going to be a fight involved.
"Were you actually able to tame one?" Byleth gave a quick nod at the question and Edelgard looked mystified. "My teacher, that is quite astounding. I'm sure many of the students in not only my class but also the other classes will be exceptionally excited to hear you have that kind of experience. You must have had an interesting childhood."
"You could call it that," Byleth had spent the first 12 years of her life in Plegia and Ylisse where her father had a longer standing contract than in other regions. If anything, they were what she'd come to truly consider her home. Occasionally they would leave for smaller countries and foreign shores she couldn't remember the names of, setting up small mercenary bases while Byleth practiced new skills. Back then she actually knew her age because her godfather knew her age. She stopped keeping track when she realized most countries didn't share the year. It wasn't until she was almost 14 (after their little Valm adventure) when Byleth got separated from her father for a time and, well, that was a story for a different day.
"Ugh, this is getting boring," Sothis complained in the background. She could wander off at any time. "Oh yeah," Sothis said, more to herself than Byleth. The two had discovered in her more tangible form Sothis was not entirely bound to Byleth. She could wander away and interact with objects as she pleased, allowing her to entertain herself with things like books or games while Byleth taught.
The closer the two got, ironically, the farther away Sothis was able to wander. And so, Sothis did wander off, as visibly bored by the tour as Byleth was starting to feel. She'd find some way to entertain herself, be it just people watching or actively terrorizing the students by making them think a ghost could ever exist on holy ground.
Perhaps Byleth could figure out a way to get to something more interesting herself, now that one her sources of entertainment had fled out of boredom. "I don't really ride wyverns I haven't trained, so I suppose the stables won't be all that important for the time being. I think you've shown me most of the campus, is there anywhere else important I should know about?" Byleth asked. If not she had some letters to get started on. In particular perhaps an appeal for Avalon to be sent along to Fodlan with the rest of the mercs who would eventually wander in from Valm. Avalon was currently under the care of Cherche.
Avalon rarely tolerated other people, but she didn't seem to mind the children of Cherche's friends. Some of which were a part of the company, though very loosely as a good many had other responsibilities. Perhaps one or two would be willing to bring over Avalon since even if she didn't allow them to ride her without Byleth present Avalon at least wouldn't attack them like she would anyone else trying to get her to do something.
Edelgard pressed a finger to her chin for a moment before an idea sparked in her eyes. "Well, not particularly. I suppose I'll release you soon. But it's about lunchtime so perhaps you'd like to join me in the dining hall?"
It wasn't supposed to be an invitation for a date, but it sounded like Edelgard was asking her out on a date. Which made her poor little heart turn frantic in her chest. She was glad she'd taken some time to get used to her own heartbeat during the last reset. She was certain she'd be convinced she was having a heart attack right about now if she hadn't. She had to admit she was a little glad Sothis wasn't around to witness her fumbling around in such a state.
"I would be honored," Byleth said. Her expression was as bland as always but her eyes practically twinkled. Unfortunately, none of her students would be able to take note of such a small thing for a good couple of moons longer. They were still new to the inner workings of someone like Byleth.
When the pair arrived at the dining hall, Byleth found it to be full of a menagerie of familiar faces. Shockingly enough, it almost felt like home for a couple of minutes as students from various different classes turned to her and called out greetings. Edelgard guided Byleth towards a table which just so happened to conspicuously have all the important Black Eagle students sitting at it. One look at Bernadetta's face revealed how little she wanted to be here and how much this must have been planned.
"Greetings professor! I, Ferdinand von Aegir, would like to welcome you to the school on behalf of all the Black Eagle students. We greatly look forward to working with you and your father," were the first words which met her ears. She tried not to sigh at the over the top greeting, but the warm expression on most of the class' faces made it easy to forget. Obviously Bernadetta was too deep in her own woes to really smile and Linhardt was asleep, but honestly? What else did Byleth expect? The normalcy of it all made her feel a bit more at ease while Edelgard led her to one of two empty seats. The two empty seats at the table just so happened to be next to each other, once again leading Byleth to assume Edelgard had planned this.
The empty seat was on her left, while Petra was seated to her right.
"Lady Edelgard, if you'd like to sit down as well I'll go and procure food for you and the professor. Any preferences?" Hubert offered, always eager to please Edelgard.
"Thank you, Hubert, I'm most assuredly fine with just about anything. Professor?"
"I have to admit to sharing the same sentiment."
Hubert nodded and disappeared in the crowded dining hall with practiced ease. Everyone else at the table already had plates in front of them, but out of respect they held off on eating. The conversation between those remaining at the table who were willing to talk quickly turned friendly and amicable. It practically made Byleth's poor little heart soar. This happiness, it wouldn't last unless she found a way to protect it. This time she wasn't going to let those smiles she'd come to so treasure break and crumble. Not this time.
She swore it.
(-)(-)(-)(-)
Reset Four, Crimson Flower
In spite of everything going on around them, in spite of the fact all of them could die tomorrow morning, everyone was smiling. Byleth wasn't sure if she loved it or hated it. The smiles coving the faces of her students were the first she'd seen in a long time. There'd been a slight lull in the constant barrage of battle after battle. It was to be expected, anyone would need a break after the death of their King. They'd finally defeated Dimitri. The decisive blow left Rhea scrambling and while they could feel the final battle closing in the Black Eagle Strikeforce was given a small amount of downtime before things really turned awful.
Byleth still thought it was an atrocious name.
The world around them might as well have been ending, but each of her students wore a smile. Even Bernadetta, who'd grow progressively stronger, wore a smile that could light up the room. No one's expression was quite so radiant as the one Edelgard wore though.
In times long past, Byleth had thought herself insane for loving Edelgard. All the way back in the first reset when she stood beside Dimitri, something about the beauty and force of Edelgard's ideals had drawn Byleth towards the Emperor. She wished that they could have spared her back then, that Byleth wouldn't have been given a reason to reset. So few people died in that route, she wouldn't have felt the need to reset if only Edelgard had lived. But in the eyes of the Emperor, Fodlan could only have one ruler.
It was something that had slowly been proven true in reset after reset. But in the eyes of someone like Byleth who'd been to more countries than she could list on two hands it seemed like a stupid assumption. The whole "there's only room for one ruler" idea was exactly what bred tyrants. Check and balances to power weren't something that just happened inside of the kingdom or empire, but outside of it as well. In that regard, multiple rulers were necessary and the power vacuum caused by the death of one in a situation like this could be catastrophic.
That was why she lobbied so hard to keep Claude alive.
"Spacing out again professor," Caspar suddenly asked her. She perked up slightly, tilting her head to the side. The table laughed at the action, even Hubert chuckling darkly and shaking his head in a way that almost seemed fond. She got along with him... frankly, better than she really should have. The two clicked in a decidedly unexpected way.
"My apologies, my head wasn't where it ought to be," Byleth admitted.
"The professor seems to always be getting lost in the thinking. 'Blame Rhea', as Dorothea would say," Petra said. Dorothea who was sitting beside Petra burst out into peals of laughter, her body movements erratic enough to reveal the fact that the two were presently holding hands under the table. Caspar smirked at Petra who turned a noticeable shade of red while Dorothea remained blessedly oblivious, her head tilted back in mirth as though it was the funniest thing she'd heard all day. Coming from Petra, it kind of was. She usually wasn't the type of indulge jokes or colloquialisms out of sheer misunderstanding of their meaning.
This one was simple enough it didn't need to be explained.
Slowly the rest of the table devolved into laughter of various volumes. From giggles to howls, spurned on not by anything particular comedic but by the laughter they were hearing around the rest of the table. It was infectious, the way the joyful noise reverberated off the walls of the old dining hall and crammed itself into their ears.
The table only went silent after Byleth started laughing. Was this the first time she'd laughed in front of the Black Eagles? Given the way they were looking at her, perhaps it very well was. She didn't care. The laugh evolved into a deep kind of belly laugh that started to make her sides ache. She was unable to control the sudden rush of emotion.
The looks of shock she was getting from around the table slowly morphed into an even brighter kind of joy which only evoked more happiness. No one was smiling with the same intensity as Edelgard who's expression practically glimmered. It made sense. Edelgard was her best friend, of course she'd be happy for Byleth. While she didn't know the full extent of what Byleth was, she knew the traits they shared in common. It was enough to make Byleth's joy infectious enough that Edelgard broke into another round of laughs.
This. If the world could just stay like this, then Byleth would be content to stay in this moment.
But the world doesn't stop turning. It trudges forward regardless of how ready you are. Time never stops moving. No matter how powerful of a deity you are.
Byleth had a feeling the statement had come from Sothis' thoughts more than they had her own. The Goddess was currently content to sit in silence for a moment. She would often get quieter after their join powers reawakened. Not silent like the first reset, but quieter. Despite that, Byleth could feel her happiness. When Byleth was happy, Sothis was happy, and there was nothing that made either of them happier than seeing their students happy.
When the darkness inevitably came, she would remember the echoes of this laughter ringing in her ears.
(-)(-)(-)(-)
Reset Four, Crimson Flowers
Byleth had never before realized how much she hated the existence of the word 'inevitable'.
She almost hated it as much as she hated the fact 'darkness' was literal in this case.
She choked back a small whimper as she looked around the dim dungeon. One strong wind was all it would have taken to blow out the torches lining the walls. And even if that eventuality didn't come, surely the torches would burn out soon enough. The only thing that kept Byleth calm was the gentle if not forceful presence in the back of her mind. Rhea was dead and her hair had faded back to its natural shades, but the existence of Sothis hadn't left her body. She wouldn't admit it to Edelgard, but her crest was still present even if the crest stone wasn't and Sothis' existence couldn't be untangled from Byleth's own.
Their pairship went too far back for them ever to be undone.
Sothis wasn't going to join them in their dark hell. Fortunately. Another thing Byleth wouldn't admit was the fact she and Sothis shared an acute case of nyctophobia.
"How did we end up here?" Edelgard asked from her position at Byleth's side. She wondered if the fact they were pressing themselves together as close as physically possible was so Byleth could comfort El or if it was for El to comfort Byleth. The question wasn't a 'how did we get here kind of question' as much as it was a 'how did we end up here' question.
It was a fair question to ask.
Things had been fine. Up until a point anyways. They beat Rhea and started headfirst into a brand new future. Things should have been fine. But Byleth should have realized by now that things are never fine. She had tried to ignore the sinking sensation in the pit of her stomach, and look where it'd gotten her.
Those Who Slither In The Dark turned out to be a bit more than either Byleth or Edelgard planned on them being. Apparently they went so far as to track down the corpse of Flayn for the purposes of stealing more of her blood. At least, that was what Byleth had gathered from Hubert who'd been in a noticeable panic for months. Keyword, had been. He wouldn't have to worry about any of that anymore. None of the Black Eagles would...
There was no time to focus on societal reform when the war against the Slithery Bitches was already underway and the Emperor was behind. Edelgard did her best, but her divided attention did her little good and only seemed to earn animosity from a restless country which was anxious to see what kind of ruler Edelgard would be. Her distraction started to look like hesitance. In the eyes of a war-ravaged population, hesitancy started to look a lot like greed and complacency. The words tyrant and warmonger were thrown around constantly.
They were able to keep their feet under them for a time. Byleth had earned Edelgard vast amounts of support. Specifically in the form of the students from other classes. Nobles, most of them, powerful ones. Unfortunately, powerful nobles didn't mean anything when they'd left their country of origin to fight for a cause their country still didn't approve of. Byleth's students all returned home, but only the Adrestian nobles were well received, as well as the Alliance nobles who belonged to territories which supported Edelgard.
Claude was as much help as he could be without endangering himself. Which was to say, not much. Byleth didn't blame him for hanging back. She'd actually told him to. She'd rather he be there to try and help pick up the pieces if everything truly went sour. And wouldn't you know it? Things went worse than sour.
The creeping mold that was Those Who Slither started to infect not only the citizenry but it clung to the faithful like the blind lambs they were. Those who saw blind faith in the Goddess' name as a way to survive. Those who were still loyal to the church. They turned on the new powers with a vengeance, regardless of the amount of placation Byleth and Edelgard attempted.
Edelgard and Byleth had plans to defang the church and get it up and running again. A less dangerous and not crest centered church, but a church dedicated to the Goddess nonetheless. Those Who Slither called these promises lies and whispered to the faithful with sweet charm and honey-flavored venom. Ironic how the most valuable allies of the people who hated the Goddess violently seemed to be those most faithful to the Goddess herself.
It wasn't long before rebellion after rebellion started to weigh heavy on Edelgard's crown. They'd won a war, sure, but that was a war. This was a slow death from the inside. It was their own knights turning against Edelgard, it was the peasants refusing to pay taxes or sell food to the capital, it was the popular opinion rending even the Emperor powerless. There was only so much that 9 people could do, regardless of how powerful those 9 people were. There was only so much a leader could do if the people refused to follow.
When Those Who Slither stepped in the battle turned into an execution. One by one, they and their friends were picked off. It was almost systematic, one by one, their blood painting sometimes the walls of their own homes. Linhardt, Bernadetta, Caspar, Ferdinand, Dorothea, Petra, and finally Hubert. Each one captured and killed till only Byleth and Edelgard remained. When Hubert died, he'd told Byleth that she was the only one he had ever actually trusted to keep Edelgard safe. His final wish, his last appeal to her, was that Byleth would stand by Edelgard when they lost. For as much as he knew their strength and Edelgard's valiant determination, he also knew a losing battle when he saw one.
Byleth promised him that much, and so here she sat in some nondescript dungeon awaiting an execution that couldn't come fast enough. Byleth would have reset by now, but she felt the need to honor her promise to Hubert regardless of circumstances.
Edelgard pressed a little farther into Byleth's side when a rat scurried past the pair, eyes glinting in the near darkness. Scratch that. With a sputtering puff the only torch near the two finally died out. The last of the light was a single miniature window at the top of the two's cell. It was obvious enough it must have been late, as the only light pouring from that window was moonlight. In the academy days, Byleth had always found the moon and stars to be a comfort. They protected her from nightmares and the shadows that haunted her steps when she wandered too late at night, unable to find sleep no matter how sweetly Sothis crooned and fretted.
Now she'd give anything just to see the sun.
"Do you regret it?" She asked, hesitantly. Her voice wavered slightly and Edelgard went rigid.
The Emperor stayed silent for a long time before she sighed. "I... I do not regret my goals. The crestocracy was an evil thing, I stand by that even now. I regret my actions and the choices I made though. I do not know if there was a better path for me to take, but looking around myself, I am certain now that I have only made things worse." Edelgard had never been one to stall or display self-doubt. She was dead set and determined. The misery in her voice now, the uncertainty, it was such a far call from the Edelgard that Byleth first met she could almost mistake the other girl for a fake.
Even Edelgard who'd been so set on her path was finally starting to come around to see things more from Byleth's viewpoint. It only took a war, the death of all their friends, and the realization that there was no way for her to feasibly win to do it. Because that was the sad fact of the matter. She'd always been outnumbered, and she didn't do herself any favors making an enemy out of Dimitri. Perhaps there were no better options, but now she'd only laid the path of domination for Those Who Slither.
"Perhaps this is punishment. From the Goddess. Perhaps she is angry that I killed her children," Edelgard laughed bitterly and Byleth tried not to flinch.
There was a stir in the back of Byleth's mind and a tiny voice finally spoke. "No amount of anger or grief should be enough to warrant a punishment like this..." Sothis had finally returned from whatever wanderings she'd been on. Byleth kind of felt bad, considering their shared fear. She shouldn't have to be down here with them. "Hush. I'll stand beside the two of you. My other half and her precious paramour."
"Do you begrudge the Goddess? Do you hate her as much as you hated her children?" Byleth asked the question she'd been terrified to ask for so many years. She'd spent such a long time afraid of the answer. The question, whether Edelgard knew it or not, would also answer whether Edelgard hated her.
"Once upon a time when I was very young, perhaps. I hated the Goddess for not saving my siblings, for creating the Crests which we died for. Now I realized that wasn't her doing. It was the doing of those who spoke for her. I shouldn't hate a creature, person, I know nothing about. I don't know if she's real. I don't know how much power she had over this world. For all I know the Goddess could have tried. I'll hold back judgment all things considered," Edelgard went quiet for a moment, glancing at Byleth. Her eyes were worried, as though she knew something she wasn't saying, and that sent chills right down Byleth's spine.
"I hated Rhea, but I don't hate the Goddess. She gave me you. You, who stood beside us and fought with everything you had. Perhaps if gods were like you, they wouldn't be so bad." Edelgard turned her face to press it into Byleth's side. She was quiet for a long time, but the tension in the air made Byleth feel like there was more Edelgard wanted to say. Eventually, Byleth was proven right.
"I had a dream the other night. A dream where you and Dimitri killed me. Then I dreamed that you and Rhea stood and against me. Then it was Claude. I thought nothing of it at first. But the more I continued to think about it... Byleth, what do you make of this?" The rare usage of Byleth's own name shocked her down to her core. It wasn't unheard of for some of her classmates to remember the past resets. Usually, only ever in dreams, they brushed off as fiction, and only ever those she spent large amounts of time. Edelgard had seemingly put the pieces together that they might not just be dreams. She was asking for confirmation.
Byleth was quiet for some time. Fuck it. If they were going to die, Byleth might as well be honest. "What if I told you this wasn't the first time I'd done all of this? What if I told you I'm supposed to be more than just a prophet or the second coming of Serios... but the actual reincarnation of a god with the powers to force back time's fingers. But only ever so far?"
Byleth was expecting revulsion or anger, but the only thing she got was another heavy sigh. The kind that made it feel like this was the answer Edelgard had been expecting. The answer she'd know all along. Edelgard leaned against her harder. "I might have been shocked, but now? Well, it would be just like you. Especially after everything that's happened. Always so strange. Thank you, my teacher, for picking me this time. Thank you for trying. Might I make one final request of you?"
Byleth gave a quick nod and Edelgard shifted so that she was looking directed at Byleth. "If you are to do this again... Don't let me go down this path. Once upon a time, I thought it was the only option, but it's so bloody and wrong. There must be a way to make a better future. I have tried my hand and I have failed. The future I created is worse, flawed and broken by underestimation of my former allies and the damages this war would cause. So, my wonderful teacher, I leave the future and all of my hopes to you. I place these fragile dreams in your hands because if it's you, I know that there might just still be hope. Do not let me walk this path, and please, don't leave me to walk alone."
Edelgard's desperate plea sent shock waves through Byleth's body. Before she could respond a door swung open with a loud thud. "The Emperess," a man in a dark hood commanded. Edelgard stood up with all the grace she could physically manage, always keeping up that powerful air. Emperor Edelgard glared hard at the man and strode forward like she still had a second plan to avoid death.
"I'll do it!" Byleth blurted as Edelgard was leaving the cell. She didn't say anything, but she turned to Byleth with a broken smile before turning and following her executioner.
Byleth wouldn't let this happen again. She wouldn't let any of this suffering happen again. No matter what she had to do, no matter how black and blue she had to beat herself. She couldn't. Now it was a promise, a vow to make a better future. For her children, her friends, her beloved, she'd do it.
No matter what it took.
She swore it.
"Just don't go too far," Sothis muttered as time bled into ceaseless waves and the two were carried back to the start.
(-)(-)(-)(-)
Headcanon that when we see support conversations between other characters in game it's actually Sothis wandered around. Watching the students like it's some kind of soap opera.
Side note, I'm a bit curious. What background ships are all of you hopeful to see? I have a couple I've already got 'planned' in the loosest sense of the word, but I'd like to hear what everyone thinks before I finalize them. A couple I'm set on, but I've always been one to weigh my merits against good arguments so I'd like to hear thoughts regardless of how set in a stone I'm feeling. Don't worry, the background ships won't 'eat' the story or the main pair.