After how badly the last couple monthly missions went, none of the students had actually managed to escape the month without some manner of bangs, bruises, and a menagerie of different bumps that resulted in constant wincing. That included Dimitri, who was concerned about the state of his classmates as well as the state of his nation. The last couple of days had been... disconcerting? That was the only word he could really use to adequately describe the situation, the closest he could get to being accurate in the way things currently felt.
He didn't have the proper assortment of words to fully encompass the heart-pounding terror of nearly dying while also being able to mention his worry regarding whatever unknown enemy was apparently trying to take down their houses. He could be eloquent, but never quite as tactful and precise with his language as someone like Sylvain. Disconcerting came close enough to describing how he felt. The real issue for Dimitri was that it wasn't just himself he had to worry about anyone. It wasn't just the Blue Lions either. It was everyone. The Eagles and Deer had sustained just as many awful injuries as the other classes, and that was especially terrifying when he considered the professor was also downed.
Dimitri admired the professor. She was brilliant and she'd done her best to protect both classes during the whole debacle at the canyon. If there was anyone he'd been expecting to still be standing by the end of it all, it was probably her. Especially when one considered the haunting ease with which she could gracefully and deftly defeat any of the students during sparring matches.
She wasn't a main teacher, but Manuela, Hanneman, and Jeralt all had a hold of her often enough that it felt like she was by having her teach whatever weapon they seemed to fancy for the day. She was good at all of them, terrifyingly adaptable. Dimitri had watched her sweep the legs right out from under Felix during one match, as though it was an easy thing to do. Had any member of the Blue Lions even managed to land a hit on her yet? Dimitri wasn't sure. It wasn't like they were weak or anything, they'd been at the academy for a good chunk of time now, and most of them were nobles. Most of them had at least some level of training. No, it was just that Professor Byleth was that good . Jeralt had once told Dimitri that while Byleth mostly specialized in sword skills, it wasn't even her true main weapon. She was more ferocious with something else, but Jeralt hadn't given him the name. It was mostly a passing comment.
Yet, she ended up out cold for a good number of days after doing her best to protect their class. It left him feeling unsettled and on edge. He wasn't the only one either.
Edelgard had looked stressed ever since her conversation with the professor the day prior. She walked around with noticeable tension in her shoulders. She was distracted too, barely paying notice to her surroundings outside of what Hubert mentioned to her. Hubert likewise seemed concerned about her. As bad as their history was, Dimitri had to admit he was a little worried too. They hadn't gotten the proper chance to talk yet, but Edelgard was the one to extend the first olive branch. It was natural he should worry about her, even if only a little; his poor stepsister who carried herself like the world had betrayed her.
Claude, on the other hand, had run around wearing a blinding smile the moment he was finally freed from his bed, or at least he tried. Dimitri could see the faintest hesitation in his gaze, alongside that calculating gleam that he'd started to realize meant so much more than he'd originally given Claude credit for. Perhaps Claude was clever and cunning, but his guard was always a little lower around Dimitri, as though he underestimated him. It almost seemed as though Claude treated him like some kind of wild animal. Dimitri had long since decided not to take personal offense to that, but to instead use it to his advantage. He could observe things about his fellow house leader that many others couldn't because of how guarded Claude usually was.
Finally, there were his own classmates. Their smiles seemed a little tighter, their gazes a little more flighty. It would have been bad either way, but something made Dimitri think that the professor being bedridden for so long had only made the situation all that much worse. Even if she wasn't their 'main' professor, Professor Byleth had such a powerful aura of strength and command that her presence made the situation feel less intimidating. Hence why his class was able to actually complete their monthly mission instead of dissolving into a panic. She carried herself with the resolve of someone who knew how to lead, who was familiar with it and was able to slip into the position with relative ease. The strength she carried herself with had allowed his classmates to carry themselves.
The moment the battle ended and she fell to the floor was the moment that the students first well and truly felt fear in that entire battle.
At least it wasn't anything too serious according to Jeralt. From what Dimitri had heard, Professor Byleth would be able to return to her normal activities soon. She would probably finally be allowed to leave the nurse's office today if he remembered correctly! Did that stop him from worrying? Absolutely not. A fourth of Dimitri's genetic composition was pure anxiety, or so Sylvain had told him when he was eight. He'd used it as a way to encourage Dimitri to loosen up as a child, but thinking about it now, Sylvain was probably right.
Dimitri did sometimes act like a walking can of anxiety waiting to burst. Situations like these didn't make it any easier.
Another quill snapped between his fingers as he made some pathetic attempt at doing his homework. He made a noise halfway between a long-suffering sigh and a growl before slamming down the portion of the quill he was still holding. The only thing that managed to accomplish was adding a new dent to his table... Not that it didn't already have plenty of dents and cracks from other similar incidents.
Sometimes Dimitri resented his Crest, he really did. It was so easy for him to break everything around him, including the things he cared about. Including the people he cared about. Perhaps it was some sick irony of fate, but his classmates would either get worried or laugh at him if he said that out loud.
He was about to pick up a fresh quill to try again when a knocking sound at his door caught his attention.
"Yo, Dimitri," he heard a voice shouting from the other side of the door. Dimitri blinked a couple of times at the familiar sound before he stood up, approaching and opening it wide as a way to welcome his guest.
"Sylvain? Is something the matter?" He asked as he took note of the other man behind his door. Sylvain was probably the most relaxed presently, out of the Blue Lions anyways. Or at least, he was the best at faking some semblance of ease. His posture was loose and he wore a half-formed grin that set Dimitri a little more at ease with himself, if only due to sheer familiarity. The eldest of the four childhood friends had always been something of a caretaker for the group, ironically enough. Judging by the fact he was currently being tailed by a distant looking Felix and a blurry-eyed Ingrid, this was still the case. Even if certain members of their group really didn't want to admit it.
Sylvain himself, for all his easy body language and warm smiling, looked to be bothered. Not as much as the two silently lagging behind him, but still bothered. He usually put some effort into his appearance, but it looked as though his uniform had been thrown on with a halfhearted effort. Unintentionally instead of his usual intentionally careless and sexy facade he tried putting up between himself and strangers. The most telling thing, though? That would be his eyes. Dimitri could see the unspoken tension in those light browns, anxious and impatient like he was waiting for something, though Dimitri couldn't begin to guess what. It was an appearance reminiscent of Felix when he was waiting for an attack. Dimitri tried not to think about it.
"Nothing's the matter with me! But you? I'm sure you're working yourself up into another one of your famous tizzies, huh?"
Dimitri flinched sheepishly as Sylvain gave him a knowing smile. Not a smirk like Sylvain liked to throw around for pretty girls, but a genuine smile. He placed a gentle hand onto Dimitri's shoulder, trying his best to make sure the sympathy in his gaze didn't start to border on pity. "Come on. The rest of the class is in the dining hall already. It's getting late. Let's go get some food in the three of you," Sylvain said glancing at Ingrid and Felix behind him, who vaguely acknowledged his statement with mute nods. A stranger might have had difficulty deciphering such expressions. A stranger probably would have assumed they were all just tired or their heads were completely blank, no positive or negative emotions acting out on their psyches.
Dimitri and Sylvain both knew better. He could only imagine how the rest of their class, his class, were currently coping right about now.
So, he decided, he'd follow Sylvain's example and try to set one himself.
"Right, of course. Thank you for reminding me. I was so invested in my classwork that I completely lost track of the time," he said. He didn't have to give the actual reason for the other three to know. Ingrid's eyes focused for just long enough to turn sympathetic and Felix hesitantly glanced away.
"You would forget, wouldn't you, boar," Felix snarled, but there wasn't any kind of emotion behind his words. As harsh as they were, his tone was completely void, there was no bite to the statement since there wasn't a single drop of feeling behind it. It seemed as though everyone with the exception of Sylvain was just kind of acting out the motions, and said exception was probably just because Sylvain was a skilled liar.
Dimitri nodded mutely and Sylvain led the way, his feet making dull thuds against the wooden floor as they left the dorms. With that, Dimitri was finally thrust back into the outside world, and it was a bit of a shock to say the least. Despite being fairly late in the day, it was still so bright. The sun had only just started dipping behind the visible horizon and the entire sky was painted in hues ranging from yellow to indigo. It would have been fitting if the sky was dipped in scarlet like blood, but apparently the world was kind enough to not go so far into poetics. Instead, it was mostly a mixture of orange, which skipped past red and faded right into shades of violets and blues the farther the sun dipped into the sky.
It was actually kind of pretty.
Whatever breeze stirred his hair was playful and gentle. It gave small tugs, but it didn't pull him the same way the tornado that had been inside his head for the last few days had. The scent was pleasant enough to the point he could almost imagine the sweet taste of the breeze. He took a deep breath, realizing just how much the sensation of fresh air brought life back to his sluggish lungs.
He wasn't the only one who seemed to perk up with sunlight and fresh air. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Sylvain's smile turn gentle and satisfied as he looked between Felix and Ingrid. It went back to normal a little too quickly for Dimitri's tastes when Sylvain realized he was being observed. Dimitri glared as if to say I saw that , and Sylvain's childishly careless grin simply asked saw what? Dimitri decided against bringing it up and Sylvain took a couple of quick steps ahead of the group. He led the way towards the dining area. He made sure to greet anyone who wandered too close to their little group, but also made sure that he continued to urge the other three along with gentle prodding whenever one or more seemed to lag for a moment too long.
Was mother hen the wrong word? No, Dimitri thought as he watched Sylvain slow down a hair and quite purposefully place his hand against Ingrid's shoulder blade to keep her moving along. She jumped slightly but didn't brush him off like she might have the typical flirty Sylvain. This version of Sylvain had an expression so gentle it almost didn't seem like the same man. A stranger might have assumed it wasn't, but it was so deeply and painfully familiar to Dimitri that it made him long for the years of their childhood prior to Glenn's death. That was when everything started to go wrong. Maybe... maybe it could still be fixed if this version of Sylvain existed.
No, Dimitri told himself quietly. No, mother hen wasn't the wrong word.
Sylvain was being exceptionally careful, retreating from the touch almost instantly when it had the desired effect. Never linger a moment longer than what was needed or what was okay, always keeping the touches in specific spots like the shoulder or the hand. Ingrid numbly continued moving, not even taking the time to really acknowledge the touch itself outside of being startled when it was initiated. The entire group was so out of it, Dimitri almost worried about what he'd encounter upon entering the dining hall. Suffice to say, he wasn't expecting it to be any better.
It was deeply unfortunate that out of all the times Dimitri had guessed about things in his life, this had to be one of the times he was right.
When Sylvain opened the door for the other three, Dimitri was the first to walk in. His eyes instantly darted towards the table that the Blue Lions usually claimed as a group when they had meals together. There were no rules regarding seating arrangement or who students were allowed to sit with. They could sit with people from different houses or faculty if they so pleased. Nor were there any assigned tables, but each class more or less had a table they usually congregated at when it came to larger group meals.
That table also typically drew members of the house when they had nowhere else to go during meals. A safe place that would usually find them among friends looking for company if they had no one else to meet with. Some members of the class even ended up there when it wasn't mealtime, studying or relaxing when they were outside of classes and had no one else to hang out with. The staff never seemed to mind, and it kept Sylvain's grades a bit higher at least.
The other four Blue Lions that Dimitri considered himself to be particularly close with were in their usual spot, and were just as much of a mess as the group who'd just entered.
Annette and Mercedes were pressed shoulder to shoulder, their heads resting against one another's. Annette was absentmindedly messing with some of Mercedes' hair which had managed to spill over both of their shoulders. Mercedes didn't even really acknowledge it, her eyes were entirely distant. It felt like she was looking at something Dimitri couldn't see, or maybe her heart and her thoughts were somewhere else entirely, far away from the table that her body was currently stationed at. Part of him wondered if there was anything more than the physical Mercedes sitting at that table. Her hand was firmly gripped in the hand that Annette wasn't using to fiddle dutifully with Mercedes's hair. The two looked like they were scared that if they let go, the other would suddenly disappear.
Dedue and Ashe were noticeably out of sorts, but at least they were acting in a manner that was akin to a functioning human being. It was more than the rest of the class could say at this point, so Dimitri silently congratulated them and hoped they weren't just faking like Sylvain. Between the pair, on the table was a mass of spread out papers, maps and notes and whatever else they deemed fit to silently stare at. Dimitri couldn't tell, and he wasn't sure what exactly they needed all of it for. They continued to whisper back and forth to one another, their voices such a low hush that even when the group of childhood friends started to get close to the table Dimitri couldn't fully make out their words.
Sylvain led their companions to the table, motioning for them all to sit down while his eyes danced around the room. The first things they landed on were the Deers, then they quickly darted towards the Eagles.
"Hello, your majesty," Ashe greeted Dimitri with his best attempt at a chipper smile. The rest of the group gave greetings to one another, though most of the attempts just sounded sad. Literally and figuratively. Aside from Sylvain who was somehow able to pull off the most dashing and charming of greetings despite the mental burden that was probably weighing just as heavily on him as it was the rest of the group. His eyes wouldn't stop making their way around the room in a quick scan every couple of minutes.
"Are you looking for the professor as well?" Dimitri asked his long-time companion.
Sylvain jumped slightly, eyes flashing back towards Dimitri for half a second. "Ah, yeah. You got me, Dima," he said awkwardly. Sylvain's gaze kept jumping between the Deers, the Eagles, the door, and then back to the Blue Lions. Making some kind of continuous rotation as though he was a guard on duty. Finally, Dimitri saw the faintest hint of panic in those eyes, which had been far too calm. Far too unbroken. Just the barest hint of the fact his ease was little more than a facade. One that was, even if only slightly, starting to crack. Deftly the crack was gone as quickly as it appeared, Sylvain burying it and giving Dimitri another charming grin.
"Please, Sylvain, I know you're as worried as the rest of us. Don't try to carry the burden of being strong by your lonesome," Dimitri whispered to his friend as they both sat down. The rest of the table didn't catch Dimitri's words.
Sylvain gave him a sad, slow smile. "I've carried worse for much longer, your Majesty. Trust in that fact. This is nothing compared to that , I'll be fine." Sylvain's easy dismissal came with another relaxed grin. If Dimitri didn't know better he'd be fooled. What was concerning was the way that his old friend emphasized the word that, as though Sylvain had spent years shouldering burdens that Dimitri didn't know about. Dimitri knew that Sylvain carried demons. Miklan being a prominent one. But Dimitri had been privy to most of these issues since he'd been old enough for Sylvain to stop being the 'big kid' of the group. The fact there was something that Dimitri didn't know about was... worrying.
Ingrid sighed as she tuned into the conversation, only catching bits and pieces of it. "We're all worried. The Professor is one of the biggest reasons none of the classes have actually had any major casualties so far. If she was to get injured, it would be partially our fault. But it's important to keep in mind that she's stronger than all of us. Maybe stronger than anyone in the monastery. Manuela gave her the go-ahead today. Captain Jeralt promised that she'd be back on her feet in time for dinner, but she'd only join us if she absolutely had the energy to. Her absence, while worrying, isn't entirely unexpected." Her words were meant to be comforting, but Dimitri just felt sick to his stomach the longer he listened to Ingrid speak.
Sylvain at least nodded, though he seemed hesitant for half a moment. "I know she's strong," he said in a rather baffling tone before another flash of something darker danced in his gaze. Again, Dimitri seemed to be the only one to notice. He was the only one who knew Sylvain well enough and wasn't out of it like Ingrid or Felix were.
The expression disappeared with even more speed, as though he was progressively getting better at hiding the cracks the longer he carried whatever was bothering him. It went beyond what was bothering the rest of their class, of that Dimitri was sure. Sylvain finally gave a laugh, seeming to brush things off. "Right you are, Ingrid! Someone as stunning and beautiful as the Professor can't be kept down by something so trivial." The words felt colorless, much the same as Felix's earlier insult had. That was Dimitri's first impression at least, the words leaving Sylvain's mouth falling just a little too flat. Colorless, without any of the debonair charm that Sylvain used like his lance and steed.
It was a pale attempt at normalcy. But Ingrid bit into the comment hook, line, and sinker, her expression twisting into one of anger and disgust. When the corners of Sylvain's mouth twitched slightly, Dimitri realized with a start that Sylvain's words had been carefully planned. As lacking as they were, they'd done everything they needed to.
"Boy, you just don't know when to quit, do you? Honestly, is that all you can think about right now!?" Dimitri swore he could practically see Ingrid's hackles starting to raise a whole foot in the air as her entire disposition slipped into a well-worn persona. Something that was easy, normal, familiar, and perhaps even a little bit genuine. He had to admit, he was a little impressed with Sylvain.
Just like that, it was a domino effect. Dedue shook his head in disappointed silence while Ashe gave a half bemused laugh, tilting his head to the side like a confused puppy. Felix all but growled while Mercedes almost seemed to snap back to reality like a rubber band upon hearing Annette groan in mock disappointment. She snapped back hard enough that her first reaction was to give a disappointed tut and pat Annette's hand.
"Sylvaaaain," Annette whined while Ingrid just shook her head and sighed in a " what are you going to do" kind of expression. For the first time since this entire mess started, Dimitri was able to let loose a genuine laugh.
It was difficult to catch, but Sylvain seemed to look satisfied with himself for a moment. "Okay, okay, I'm sorry. Pinky promise. Now come on, all seven of you. It's nearly dark out and I know for a fact that none of you have eaten a thing yet. Let's try and get some dinner before it's too late!" As though by some magic only privy to Sylvain, the mention of food created a series of rumbles that could be heard all around the table. Ah, right. Food. A couple of sheepish glances went around the table. Others actually seemed to perk up a little at the idea of something to eat.
Now Dimitri understood. This entire encounter had been well-engineered and planned out the entire time. Sylvain, with all his knowledge of wordsmithing and social engineering, had done his damnedest to try and bring something normal and familiar to the group, to try and snap them out of their stupor just long enough for them to actually take care of themselves. Dimitri considered himself very lucky to be blessed with such an amazing and loyal best friend, even if he was the only one who knew it.
The entirely table stood up, some faster than others, but they all started to move to get into line after Sylvain began leading the charge. Like a mother hen leading little chicks, they toddled after the redhead on unsteady legs. Still confused and upset, but distracted for the moment by the powerful feeling that everything was okay. It was the same power that the Professor seemed to wield if only a little weaker. A mystery indeed, how two people who acted so strange sometimes could use such a powerful kind of charisma.
Dimitri was the last to stand, receiving a moderately worried glance from Sylvain. He only returned the expression with a grateful smile, to which Sylvain pointedly averted his own gaze.
Everything was fine and calm at last, until Dimitri detected the faintest of sobs on his way past the Black Eagles' table. Apparently, Sylvain also heard the noise, and with a shocking amount of speed and grace, he targeted the one girl who was at the end of the Black Eagles' table. She was sitting mostly isolated from the group by a gap that was a couple of seats wide. The other Black Eagles, apparently absorbed in their own issues, had yet to detect the sobbing. Probably because she was actually doing a decently skillful job of hiding the fat tears rolling down her cheeks.
Dimitri only noticed because he managed to catch the noise over the din of the room as he was passing by. It was a marvel how Sylvain had noticed.
"You good, Bernadetta?" He asked as he kneeled down next to the smaller girl. She jumped with a yelp, raising her head enough to see the glittering of wetness on her red cheeks.
Edelgard turned, only now taking note of Bernadetta's distress. She gave him a sharp glare while she was still trying to decide if he was a threat or if he was here to help. Her glare quickly faltered. Apparently, something in the gaze of Dimitri's long-time friend struck a chord with his rival house leader, which in turn caused her to relent slightly. "She's been like that ever since this morning. She won't tell any of us if she's hurt or not, and refuses to communicate what the issue might be," Edelgard said. There were drips of worry very apparent in her tone, while she looked at Bernadetta with an equal mix of concern and disappointment. The hints of disappointment and frustration were obviously directed at herself for not being able to help, but even having known Bernadetta from a distance, Dimitri could guess they were probably making her reaction much worse. Hence why she recoiled from the entire house and was refusing to let them help her.
"Are you hurt? Do you need to see Manuela?" Dimitri asked, but that only caused Bernadette to pull in tighter on herself. The small hiccuped sob was much louder this time, loud enough that a certain someone perked up and caught the noise.
"You aren't being bullying Bernadetta, are you? You better not be!" Hilda yelled all the way from the Golden Deer portion of the room. In a terrifying display of unity, every head in their house swiveled to look at Sylvain and Dimitri. Or more so Dimitri. The force of their unified glare was strong enough to cause Dimitri to stumble backward away from Bernadetta like he'd been burned.
Sylvain didn't so much as blink, acting as though the Golden Deers didn't even exist. "You're not in trouble. You've done nothing wrong. You are not at fault," Sylvain said in a hushed voice and like some kind of magic spell had been uttered, the tension in Bernadetta's shoulders slowly started to bleed out. She was crying louder now, but she actually clung to Sylvain when he offered her a hand. He didn't push her to try and explain, he just let her be quiet and cry, trying his best to keep her attention off the room that was slowly becoming more and more riled up in her defense, thinking everyone else was the bad guy. Talk about a mess.
Bernadetta only unlinked her hands from Sylvain in order to cover her ears when a couple of Blue Lions came to the defense of Sylvain and Dimitri while a couple of the Black Eagles also decided to join the fray.
Sylvain, without missing a beat, turned to Hilda. "The only one who could be accused of bullying right now is you. Could you please shut up?" He asked her. Any pretense of the charming and flirty personality Sylvain usually wore was completely gone, his gaze a glare more ferocious than that of the Deers combined. Hilda was obviously a bit taken off guard, but only for a couple of moments before her expression became colored with disbelief and embarrassment. After that, the tension in the room became palpable to every class. Not to mention the silence became stifling. The only noise was Bernadetta's sobbing.
Glares were traded on behalf of one another's honor, body language was slowly becoming aggressive. What had started as a gesture of good faith and genuine kindness was so quickly able to turn sour as Bernadetta's own house started to inch a little closer to her defensively. Bernadetta was practically stuck in the middle, becoming paralyzed with a look of horror and fear. All she did was cradle a bandage wrapped arm to her chest in mute terror.
Again, the dining hall burst into yelling and threats. Some people were genuinely concerned about Bernadetta as they threw around insults. Others were apparently just looking for a fight, or maybe a distraction. In the center of it all was Sylvain and Dimitri, who'd moved to stand behind his best friend. The look on Sylvain's face was slowly becoming one of pure anger as the room just got louder and louder, resulting in Bernadetta's crying getting louder and louder.
"Dimitri, could you please move?"
It was amazing how a simple phrase could strike a terrifying silence in a room full of angry teenagers.
And yet, that was simply the kind presence that she had. A daunting and familiar voice spoke from behind him, and the entire room fell into a dead silence. Dimitri's body moved before he had even fully registered the words themselves. Sylvain moved alongside Dimitri, going to stand next to the Blue Lions once more and glancing over each and every one of them.
Professor Byleth strode past him, her steps graceful, if not a little shaky. It was easy to tell that she was tired by the shadows below her eyes, but her gaze was completely trained on Bernadetta. All three houses were entirely silent. Byleth kneeled down next to Bernadetta, where Sylvain had been moments before, her gaze so riddled with concern that Dimitri felt the breath leave his lungs.
Byleth wasn't the most expressive person in the world, not by a long shot, but he and many others had come to accept this. She was still a good teacher, a kind one, and it was obvious by a lot of her actions she was plenty kind. She cared, but she had difficulty showing it. That being said, he still didn't believe her to be a humanitarian by any means, and while she cared about all of them he didn't think she quite loved them as much as Jeralt claimed she did. With that gaze, that single gaze so full of warmth and humanity and worry, Dimitri found himself having to reassess a lot of his assumptions about her.
"What's wrong? Is your arm hurting? Manuela told me she had to patch up a cut on your arm, but she gave you pain killers. You've been taking them, right?" In spite of the power and command she'd held in her voice when she ordered Dimitri out of the way, her voice had turned quiet and gentle. It was practically a murmur that was only audible to Dimitri thanks to how close he still was. Something made him think it was only meant for Bernadetta.
Out of the corner of his gaze, he could see Sylvain relax, giving their professor a warm expression before retreating a couple of steps farther towards the rest of the Blue Lions. Now that everything had seemingly calmed down, his gaze was drawn towards Edelgard. She was Bernadetta's house leader. That was why he looked at her with curiosity as the Professor tried to speak with the shy archer.
"No. I'm not hurt," she said at the exact same volume that Byleth had delivered her words with. Her eyes were cast towards the floor and Dimitri could see her frantically swallowing given the way her throat kept twitching and constricting. Byleth remained quiet while Bernadetta shuffled awkwardly. "It's just that..." Her grip on her arm tightened further and Dimitri was starting to feel a little nervous for her. It was obvious that she was struggling, but Byleth was patient and something about her presence made Bernadetta obvious to the fact the entire room was staring at them with concern.
"It's just that... when Manuela checked my arm she said that the wound I got was going to scar!" Bernadetta's eyes were starting to overflow with tears once more and she seemed to crumple slightly. Be it the revelation or the gazes of their classmates finally reaching her, Dimitri wasn't sure, but something about the way she said the words made it actually feel like this was the worst thing in the world despite how much the idea of scarring really didn't bother Dimitri. In fact, he already had a few from his childhood. A couple more weren't a bother. But the way Bernadetta said this with so much genuine distress made Dimitri feel like her world was ending.
It was certainly interesting to watch the changes in Byleth's expression. Not only because it was so rare to see her this expressive, but the emotions themselves caught Dimitri's attention. The speed with which it went from lethal, to sympathetic, and then back to gentle all before speaking to Berandetta a second time baffled Dimitri. Well, the second two didn't, but there was a split second after Bernadetta spoke where he swore Byleth was planning a murder. Obviously not Bernadetta's, but what did she know to cause such a reaction when no one else would feel the same. They were finally speaking loud enough that the rest of the room was starting to be able to hear the conversation.
It was only then that Dimitri saw some anger in the eyes of other Black Eagles and he genuinely wondered if there was a secret that they and the Professor knew that he didn't.
It was worth mentioning there were things Dimitri didn't notice in the eyes of his peers. Things that only a silent observer might be able to notice. Like a similar flash of anger in the eyes of a specific redhead standing a couple of paces behind Dimitri.
After schooling both her expression and tone, Byleth finally spoke to Bernadetta. "Is that an issue?" She asked. It wasn't a belittling question as Byleth phrased it with genuine curiosity. It would make sense: a mercenary like her wouldn't bat an eye at a couple of scars, but she was treating Bernadetta gently and letting her explain instead of dismissing her concerns.
"Of course it's an issue!" There was obviously more to it than Bernadetta wanted to stay. Her entire body went rigid and she clammed up for a moment, unable to force any words out. "Scars are bad," she finally settled on saying. She continued to struggle with some internal dilemma before forcing out one last phrase. One last phrase that seemed to entirely change the conversation for some people: "If you have scars, you can't ever get a husband."
With that Dimitri could see the way a number of Black Eagles fluffed up with anger, as well as the Professor. Some of the others flinched. Well, really it was more Dorothea and Edelgard who flinched. Petra was more confused than anything, looking at Bernadetta with sympathy but also a mystified expression. Dimitri noticed a couple of other uncomfortable expressions around the room. Particularly from a lot of the girls, but also a few from some of the guys like Lorenz or Ferdinand who awkwardly reached for body parts that had been injured in the last battle.
Dimitri was almost worried that the Professor was going to snap at Bernadetta with how her gaze went hard and dangerous. Yet, her words only came out gentle, if not mildly terrifying given the edge she was trying to hold back. She spoke loud enough that the entire room could take note of her words. "Whoever told you that was Dead wrong." The emphasis she placed on the word dead sent chills up and down Dimitri's spine.
"She's kind of right though," Dorothea said. She didn't say it to be mean, at least not towards Bernadetta. If anything her tone was discouraged and somber sounding. "From the words of some people I've actually met. 'Women with too many scars are unworthy of marriage'." Her tone took on an edge of disgust and Dimitri actually felt himself starting to get angry.
Byleth paused for a long minute, the silence becoming stifling as she tried to figure out how to address the situation. She toyed with the sleeve of the jacket she'd come in wearing. It was only then he took the time to notice she wasn't in her regular clothing. Instead, she was in a jacket he thought had belonged to Jeralt and a set of loose-fitting trousers. It made sense, she was still hurt and the apparel didn't put stress on her body, unlike with the tight-fitting and revealing clothing she usually wore which could mess up her body temperature. She tugged on the sleeve more, her mouth slowly becoming a thin, tight looking line.
"Very well, then. Bernadetta, if a single scar makes your unworthy marriage, then the two of us can be unworthy together," she said, taking the hand of the girl who became stunned and dazed by conviction in the Professor's gaze. This seemed to take a lot of the students off guard.
"Professor, with all due respect," Lorenz piped up from the other side of the room, "someone like yourself can't really be defined as unworthy. Nobility or not, you'd be a jewel for any crown." It was hard to tell, but Dimitri thought that Lorenz was trying to compliment her.
"Why is that?" She asked him. It was at that moment Dimitri realized two very important things about what was happening. The Professor had slipped into her 'teacher voice', and Sylvain was grinning ear to ear.
Dorothea shook her head at that as though the Professor had asked a stupid question. "Professor, someone like you? You're so strong and noble. It should be easy for you to find a husband! Or a wife, if you roll that way," Dorothea, of course, mentioned the last sentence under her breath as though she was provoking for a comment. Byleth outright ignored it altogether in favor of focusing on the second sentence.
"Alright. For a moment, let's say I'm as strong and noble as all of you believe. There are other people here who are strong and noble. Ingrid is quite easily both, and will have no issues passing her pegasus knight exams once she's better with flying. Bernadetta is strong and clever, even if she decides to brush off the compliment. Dorothea, you yourself are ferocious and cunning. Despite what you may yourself believe, it's not your beauty that draws people towards you and you certainly don't need to be taken care of," the aforementioned girls all blushed rosy and Dorothea looked like she wanted to argue. Byleth didn't give her the chance. "Are these traits not equal? So, therefore, we have two options. Either I am undesirable because, just like them, my own scars eliminate my positive traits, or we accept that a person's scars don't take away or lower their intrinsic worth as a person."
Dorothea floundered for a response, and it looked like a couple of the people who'd been self-conscious themselves were actually starting to believe her. Including Bernadetta, who'd stopped cradling her arm and was looking up at Byleth, who'd stood up, with pure delight and marvel.
"Yeah, okay, sure. Whatever you say Professor, but we all have to admit there's only so much scarring a person can have before it does start to detract," Hilda was the one to voice her complaints. Claude, who was sitting next to her presently, outright glared, but she kept going. "A couple of scars in the right places can be ignored, or even sexy on some people. Too many scars though? Your accomplishments start to not matter anymore. I doubt you have enough scars to worry about that, Professor. You're way too strong, I'm sure there are some people in this room with more scars than you! I also don't think anyone in this room is that far along yet either. But I think Bernadetta's right to be worrying about it. Can't we just take it as, I don't know, a reason to be more careful or something?"
Dimitri was worried. He was specifically worried about Hilda. The Professor turned to her, but said absolutely nothing. She just stared at Hilda in complete silence for what had to be a full minute, the more time passed the more scared Hilda herself actually started to look. Then she just turned back to Bernadetta, her gaze full of flame. "Scars typically never fade, not naturally. There are types of magics and potions that can get rid of them over time. I know this because I know one of the Dark Mages who actually coined the practice after a good friend of ours started to worry. She was a princess who thought her scars would make her worthless. I know how to make these potions, and if anyone takes problems with their scars then you can bring those problems to me and I will make you that potion."
With this, she paused and turned to the room as a whole, holding tight to the sleeve of her jacket. "But I think that's completely fucking stupid! Scars cannot and will not ever make you less of a person. It's my belief that they make you more of one. Every single scar each of you has tells a story, all of them. They're a reminder that you've faced down the world, a world that hit you with everything that it damn well had. And regardless of how you responded to that hit, you lived. You lived damn it! You are here, alive, with air in your lungs and blood in your veins! You lived to hit the world back. So be proud, each and every one of you, your scars will tell your stories, stories dedicated to the honor and glory of the fact that you survived. Because that's the only real kind of glory there is. Life. Continuing to live. Because if you aren't alive how are you ever going to change the world? How are you going to protect the things you care about? My own scars tell everything about my character that needs to be said. When my friend asked if I myself would like to erase my scars with her potion, I told her no. And if anyone else has a problem with your scars, then you can bring them to me!"
Byleth roared and in one fluid motion tore the jacket from her body. Dimitri felt his stomach do flips, and judging by some people's gaze, theirs did something similar. The only thing she was wearing underneath was a piece of cloth to cover her chest and hold it tightly in place, the kind someone might wear during unarmed training combat depending on the practice. Either way, it was bound tightly enough they wouldn't be seeing anything tasteless. She actually smiled. Dimitri could hear Edelgard make a choking noise. He felt that. Almost her entire upper body was on display and she was looking at the entire dining hall with a relaxed expression. She wasn't uncomfortable at all!
Of course, what reason would she have to look uncomfortable? As her arms hung loosely at her sides and she dropped the jacket to the ground, she looked out over a sea of her starstruck pupils looking noticeably proud. As the shock passed Dimitri and the rest of the students took in her whole appearance. Her arms, her sides, her back. Dear Goddess, she was covered in more scars than Dimitri could count. It was like a mosaic of discolored skin, some old and some new. The only thing that wasn't marked up was her face, and now Dimitri finally realized he could see faint lines on her cheek that he just never bothered to notice before. There were even a couple of tattoos.
Most of the scars had smoothed out with age, they curled around her form in a weirdly elegant manner. That was probably thanks to having been cared for well since they were first acquired as wounds. Their state now only went to show how old they were. They didn't cover her entirely. There were gaps and patches of flesh that weren't marked up. One of the things Dimitri noticed was the fact there weren't as many as he first thought. That wasn't to diminish it by any means, there were still a lot, but they looked more daunting because most of the scars she had were larger ones. As though each mark made on her had been in a battle between life and death. As though the difference between being here now and never having met her students was the flick of a blade or a well-timed spell.
Some people were horrified. Others looked on with amazement. There were certain people who turned a shade of scarlet so bright Dimitri worried sh- they might pop a blood vessel.
Dimitri found himself wondering if more scars and tattoos ran the length of her body that wasn't visible, but he cut that train of thought off quickly. Those in the class who'd been arguing against scarring had all gone silent as a grave. They looked at Byleth with a strange mixture of emotions, but the most important person that Dimitri paid attention to was Bernadetta. She looked up at Byleth with a sense of awe.
"It's really okay? To have this, ah, this many scars?" She asked hesitantly. Byleth just nodded, giving her one more gentle smile.
"Even if your battles weren't grand ones, each scar you ever have will mean something. It's perfectly fine because they're a part of you and tell stories about the pieces of you that people might not always see at first glance. When that mark on your arm scars, it won't just be the story of how you got hurt in our most recent battle. It'll be the story of how you got hurt trying to keep Felix from getting hit by an enemy he didn't notice." The moment Byleth said that Bernadetta turned scarlet and Felix jumped, seemingly startled by the revelation.
"Wait, that's how you got hurt?" Dorothea asked, turning on Bernadetta. The conversation didn't get the chance to continue, Byleth shutting it down just as quickly as she'd revealed that little detail.
"To prove my point, I'll even do something special. I'll tell you the story of how I got any of my tattoos or scars. Completely honest, no lies or tricks. The only stipulation is that you can only ask about one scar or tattoo per month, and I'm not going to be telling you anything that isn't important to the story," she said and Claude's gaze instantly narrowed. The Professor started to pick up her jacket to put it back on once a scar had been picked, but she paused for a moment. "Bernadetta, why don't you pick the first one. It seems like everyone could use a way to relax so now is the perfect time to start. Not to mention, you were concerned first. I'm not very good with stories, but telling one might just help a little."
Bernadetta froze up, her cheeks dusting a shade of pink as she glanced between Byleth and the floor. "Ahhh, that really big one!" She pointed randomly and Dimitri had the feeling Bernadetta didn't actually pick one. That big one could be used to describe most if not all of the marks covering their Professor. She just laughed though, a small hint of amusement in her tone as Bernadetta continued to point, not actually looking at what she was pointing towards.
"Do you mean the claw mark right underneath my collar bone?" The professor asked and Bernadetta just nodded, taking the easy way out. The scar in question was long, starting right beneath her collarbone almost in the middle before trailing up to meet the professor's right shoulder where it tapered off. The hit itself looked like it probably hurt at the time, but Byleth had an undeniably fond expression as she ran her fingers across the darkened flesh. It was a curious scar because it almost looked like it'd been stretched.
The Professor took a moment to put her jacket back on before setting into the seat next to Bernadetta. Her hand continued to hover over the cloth that was hiding the scar. "I must say, you've picked a very good story," she said as she motioned for the other two classes to sit down. "Those of you who haven't eaten yet please make sure you go grab something, and possibly grab me something too. I'm starting to think Manuela purposefully feeds us the most tasteless things she can find as punishment for making her job harder," she quickly amended and a couple laughs seemed to agree with her statement.
The Blue Lions finally grabbed something to eat as well as a couple of other students who hadn't gotten their meals yet. Someone grabbed something for Byleth, but she mostly seemed to ignore it. She was probably just encouraging the students to get some food in them. It took awhile for the classes to push enough tables together to have room, but eventually, the Golden Deers and the Blue Lions were able to make themselves comfortable seated around the Black Eagles typical table.
"Now this is a special story," she said as everyone started to settle in, leaning against one another. Dimitri found himself in the middle of the Blue Lions. Arms jabbed into his sides and he felt bodies leaning against him, but he didn't really mind. "Now this scar is special because it's the very first scar I ever got. It's precious to me because it tells the story of how I made one of my best friends in the world. This is the story of how I tamed a wyvern, a large and terrifying creature who I named Avalon..."
All three classes leaned in close, eyes trained on their professor as she launched into her tale.
Bernadetta stopped cradling her arm.