Hello lovelies! I feel like it's been 72,000 years since I've written anything. Shame on me. I had originally intended for this series to go in order with each episode. I should have known better. My brain doesn't do linear very well. This is my exploration of the connection between Regina and the Queen and the odd twist that is GoldenQueen.

I'm going to say possible TW for dubcon just to be safe, but really nothing graphic at all.

"Regina open this door." Robin's fist pounds against the wood. They'd been curled on the couch, blissfully alone for the evening when she'd abruptly pulled away from him and disappeared upstairs. He'd waited a moment, two to be precise, watched as the clock on the mantel clicked down each second before going after her. He can hear the water running, see the steam curling from under the door. "Regina!" he pounds again, trying the nob again and again.

"I'm fine, Robin," she manages to steady her voice into something she hopes he believes.

He hears here muffled cry, the sound of something banging against the side of the tub. "Regina." He waits another beat, infuriated by her denial of him, but still not wanting to intrude on whatever secret she's keeping. She has her reason's, he's sure and as much as he wants to believe her, he's not about to sit outside the door when he knows she is not fine.

She cries out, a short choked thing followed by another thud against the tub and Robin puts his shoulder into the door. It flies open, bouncing off the opposite wall (denting it no doubt, but he'll fix it later). He falls to his knees beside her. She's curled into herself on the floor of the tub, fully clothed, water running too hot from the shower head above.

"Gods, Regina." He reaches around her to turn off the tap, wipes wet hair from her face. "What on earth is going on?"

"It's nothing. I can't handle." She gasping for breath, shaking as she tries to turn away from him.

"This is handling?" he questions. "Regina, it's me. You can tell me anything." He steps into the tub, scoots down the wall settling in behind her and pulls her shaking body against him. He's soaked in seconds, but he doesn't notice anything but the way she trembles against him, the way she buries her face into his neck, hiding herself away. "I love you," he kisses into wet hair.

"I love you too," she mutters against him, her hand fisting in his shirts. "But I need you to go. Please." She looks at him then, brown eyes red and pleading hold his gaze until she's pushing away from him, curling back into the ball he found her in, whimpered cries muffled against her own thighs.

Robin doesn't leave the tub, but he doesn't force her to stay in his arms. She's scooted as far away as she can, which isn't that far, she's still trapped between his calves. Robin brings his knees up to try to give her a bit more room as she begins rocking herself back and forth. "Let me help you," he begs her, reaching out and grabbing her ankle. She flinches at the contact, but doesn't pull away. Robin moves slowly, his hand tentatively moving up to her hip as he resituates himself to his knees, hovering over her.

Regina makes herself impossibly smaller, practically fusing to the tub floor. Robin's hand is warm and steady against her hip, his other rests gently on the small of her back and she both loves him and hates him for being there. It's going to happen again, she can feel the coiling in her stomach, the tightening of her muscles, the racing of her heart. Her hand lurches back, blindly reaching for his. She means to push him away, to rid her body of his touch, but her fingers grip on to his and instead of pushing him away she's pulling him closer.

He moving down to her the moment her fingers meet his, matches her white knuckled grip with his own, presses his chest to her back as she cries out and goes boneless beneath him. Then she's just cries: loud painful sobs that block air from her lungs as they echo off the tiles around them. Robin sits back on his heels bringing her with him, scoops her out of the tub as he stands and carries her into the bedroom. She's shivering against him, wet clothes and hair growing colder by the second. This he can fix, Robin thinks as he peels her ruined dress off, leaving the garment to puddle on the floor and wraps her in the duvet, pooling it around her until she's cocooned. He sheds his own soaked clothes faster than he ever has in his life and slips into the pajamas he'd discarded on the floor that morning. Not once does he look away from her.

By the time he crawls into bed her sobs have faded to occasional hiccups and shuddered breaths; by the time she meets his eyes, she's warm, relaxed, and safe. "I can feel them," she confesses quietly into the darkness of their room. Robin inches closer, runs soothing fingers through her hair, along her cheek, and waits for her to elaborate. "The Evil Queen and Gold," she chokes out. "I can feel when their…together." She tenses in his arms as giving voice to what is happening makes it all the more horrible. Robin's hold around her tightens.

"How long has this been happening?" he asks, folding the blankets back so he can see a bit more of her.

"A few weeks now," she admits. Robin sighs heavily beside her. "The last few times it's been more" she pauses, searching for the right word, "…intense?" She sees him flinch out of the corner of her eye and everything she's feared comes crashing down. "God I—I'm sorry. I can't-" she pulls at the blankets, wrapping them more tightly around her.

"You can't control it," he finishes for her, prying the blankets away from where she's tried to bury her face from him. "Regina, I wish you would've told me." He thinks back on her behavior and hates himself for not noticing sooner. She's been avoiding his touch, leaving the table during meals, slipping out of their bed in the middle of the night. She shouldn't have had to tell him, he curses himself. He should have figured it out.

"I…" She can't say it. It sounds so ridiculous now as they sit on the edge of their bed wrapped up in each other, but she didn't want to lose him, didn't want to give him any reason at all to walk away.

He thumbs away the tear that slips free as she sniffs against him. He knows what she's thinking; she's always been an open book to him. "I'm not going anywhere, mi'lady. Certainly not for something beyond your control, something that's causing you pain." His fingers weave through her hair, the locks drying into the reckless curls that he loves. "May I hold you?" he asks, scooting fractionally closer, watching her face for any sign that he should retreat.

"You still want to?" she asks already letting her body melt into his.

"Until my end, Regina. No matter what. Never hide from me."

She nods against him as he pulls her the rest of the way in, snaking his arms through layers of blanket until his palm presses against her bare back and his legs tangle with her own. "I love you," she breathes into him, letting him soothe, letting him heal.

"And I you," his lips brush her forehead. "We'll figure this out, Regina. Don't ever think you're alone." He rubs aimless patterns against her skin long after she's fallen asleep, wishing not for the first time that he could take her away from the pain that haunts her life. But she's peaceful now, snoring softly in his arms as he drops delicate kisses into her hair.

...

...

...

She turns away from him; he's long since turned away from her. The moment they'd finished this evenings distractions he had left her in a cold bed, left the room with the door banging shut behind him. "Dark One's don't sleep," he's told her before. She's told him that "Queen's don't cuddle," and she's never asked him to stay, yet she still flinches every time the door slams. The bed is comfortable enough, the sheets silken as they slide against her skin. She's loose limbed, sated, chilled from sweat that cools her skin. The Queen turns to her side, pulling the unused pillow against her chest. She closes her eyes, focusing on the feeling of loving arms wrapped around her.

A single tear falls for the warmth that will never be there.

Reviews and prompts are welcome and appreciated. Thank you for visiting.