Chapter 10

Changing for the Better, or for the Worse

"So where are they, Wench?" InuYasha asked, looking around the grove. Kagome was silent, her eyes traveling around the woods. For the most part she was going in and out, sometimes she would be there, others she would retreat into herself, punishing herself by thinking of InuYasha and Kikyou.

Even after walking for a straight week she couldn't stop thinking about what Sesshomaru had told her. InuYasha was mated, and most likely was going to be a father. Yes, Kagome had made the decision to give up InuYasha, to let him live his life, but that didn't take the hurt away. It didn't stop the constricting of her heart when he looked towards the distance, as if searching for something. It didn't stop her painful hot tears as he snuck away every night thinking she hadn't noticed.

She just wanted it to stop. She wanted this feeling of despair gone, but nothing worked. The only one that somehow was able to get her mind away from InuYasha's betrayal was Titan, and even then he had trouble. He couldn't reveal that he was Sesshomaru, but he still wanted to help her. She was thankful for the lord, even if she couldn't tell him. He was going out of his way to try and cheer her up, but he hated humans.

While they dreamt she was most at peace. She didn't have to have any dreams of InuYasha, and Sesshomaru spent their nights training her. She woke tired and drained, every muscle sore, but it was worth it. She was making herself stronger, and that is what she needed at this point. She needed to stop feeling sorry about her self. She needed to move on from InuYasha, and focus on her. It was easier said then done, but she believed with Sesshomaru's help she will become strong enough to not rely on InuYasha any more, and when that happened she could finally be free.

"Wench!" InuYasha shouted, making Kagome jump. She glared at the hanyou, hating how he talked to her, but not being able to do anything about. He never listened to her when she voiced her aggravtions. When they first met, it angered her with the names, but then she started to grow used to it, and even accepted it as a term of endearment. But now… now she hated it. Why would she ever think being called a whore was an endearment.

"What InuYasha?" Kagome asked, her tone that of annoyance. Sango and Miroku noticed the change in Kagome. She was no longer the fun going, caring girl the knew. She was withdrawn and easy annoyed, especially towards InuYasha. They worried for her as friends should, but they didn't know how to go about helping her. She wouldn't talk to them.

Shippo who was riding on Kagome's shoulder, clutched to his mother figure, just as worried as the others. She still smiled at him, laughed at his jokes, and took care of him the same. But she was different. The light didn't meet her eyes, and her smile was as large. The warm Kagome aura that he fed off of, craved, and loved to cuddle up in was gone. Yes, she was still his mother, still attentive and loving towards him, but she wasn't Kagome. And he knew InuYasha had done something to hurt her, and Shippo hated him for it.

The only one who didn't seem. To notice was InuYasha. He still acted the same, treated her the same, and continued on as if the heart of the group wasn't shattered. He knew Kagome was upset with him, but he also knew he hadn't done anything wrong. When she first arrived back to his time, he went over every interaction they had and not one thing stood out. He just assumed she would get over like she did everything else.

"Where is the brat?" InuYasha asked, stopping to look at Kagome, his arms crossed in front of his chest. Kagome glared at him, tempted to sit him just to make her feel better. The wind blew, causing the large red sleeves of the haori to flutter in the wind, while his hair followed in the same fashion.

"Why do you have to be so rude?" Kagome retorted, her voice snappy. To anyone else, they could hear the warning tone in her voice, and they knew InuYasha needed to tread carefully. "Her name is Rin, not brat. It may be an inconvenience to you to take her in, but she is just a child and shouldn't be left on her own."

"She wouldn't be on her own if the bastard could take care of her. I hope the fuckers dead." InuYasha replied, shrugging his shoulders. Titan took a step towards his brother, wanting to rip out the demons throat.

"Sit boy!" Kagome screamed, and InuYasha grunted as he hit the ground harder than he ever had before. "Sit! Sit! Sit! Sit! Sit!" Kagome continued, watching with tears in her eyes as the half demon went farther into the ground. She only stopped screaming when Titan nipped at her hand getting her attention. "Just stop talking InuYasha. No one wants to hear you." Kagome whispered when she calmed down.

She began walking again, patting Shippo on the bottom as he hugged her neck in support. She was thankful for her little kit as much as she was Sesshomaru at this point. Sesshomaru had told her to keep following the sun rise, and they would find Rin, and she trusted him. So that was what she was doing, but InuYasha wasn't able to have that much trust in his half brother. It was just another annoyance Kagome had in her friend.

They continued walking, Kagome now in the front. InuYasha had crawled out of his crater and joined them a few minutes after they left and stayed in the back. Far away from the irate female. The group had been silent for the most part, no one wanting to set of Kagome. The only noise heard was Shippo and Kirara running around the adults feet as they played. They seemed to know they would be spared Kagome's ire.

"Kagome?" Sango questioned slowly stepping up towards her best friend.

"I'm not mad at you or Miroku." Kagome admitted freely, and Sango nodded already knowing that. She just wanted to help her sister in any way that she could. First, she had to get Kagome to talk about it.

"I know. You would have told us if you were." Sango replied, keeping her pace matched with Kagome's as she adjusted her boomerang on her shoulder. "What did he do? We've never seen you this hurt before"

Kagome was silent for a moment thinking of what she wanted to say. She still hadn't talked to anyone about what she was feeling and she wasn't sure she was ready to. How did she tell someone that her heart was broken, but she was still in love with the man who broke it. Not a lot of people would understand that, and at the moment she was still trying to deal with rejection she didn't want confused pity and judgement as well.

"I can't talk about it right now. I'm not ready." Kagome whispered, keeping her voice low so InuYasha couldn't hear her. "He…chose, Sango, and it wasn't me." Kagome admitted, hoping that would be enough for Sango at the moment. She really couldn't say anymore than that. She needed time.

"I understand, Kagome, and when your ready I'll be here." Sango replied soothingly. She was burning up inside, her blood in a rage, but all of that was directed towards InuYasha. She had a feeling this was the way things were going to go, but she hated the hanyou for leading Kagome on as he did. He shouldn't have dragged Kagome around for years, but he did, and now Kagome was broken.

"Miko." Titan called into her mind, gaining Kagome's attention. She turned to look at him, saw what he was sitting by and sighed in relief. It was a giant paw print, one she recognized from the dragon Ah-Un. They were close. She was so tired and just wanted to sleep.

"They went this way." She announced, following the tracks without waiting for anyone to reply. Titan fell in beside her, and she could feel his tension. She knew he was anxious to see his daughter, and she was glad to help them. It was the least she could do at this point. He had been there for her the most. Although silent, it was what she needed.

They continued walking in the new direction, the silence still thick around them. Kirara was now perched in Sango's arms sensing her masters upset and Shippo was perched on Miroku's shoulder. InuYasha was still in the back, his grumbling getting louder as they got closer to the person they were searching for.

"Lady Kagome." A girls voice shouted, and Kagome smiled as Rin launched herself from the dragon and into the young woman's arms. Kagome wasted no time hugging the girl to her, knowing the child probably needed the contact. It had been months since she had spoken to anyone other than Jaken and Ah-Un.

"Rin, how have you been?" Kagome asked, kneeling down to the child's level. She could see Titan sitting by a tree not to far away, and she knew he was relieved to see Rin unharmed. She couldn't blame him, this was his child.

"Good, Lady Kagome. Rin had been lonely though. Lord Sesshomaru has gone missing and Jaken left." Rin admitted, letting go of the woman and kneeling down to pick at a few flowers between herself and Kagome.

"Where did Jaken go?" Kagome asked, hearing the growl in her head at the news. Now she was going to have a grumpy Titan on her hands.

"He said he didn't get paid enough to take care of Rin, and deal with the lord. So he left and never came back." Rin said sadly, looking up at Kagome with doe brown eyes threatening to mist. "Is that why Lord Sesshomaru left. Did he no longer what Rin?"

"That's not true at all." Kagome replied immediately. Her tone not leaving any room for arguments. "That's why I'm here. You see, Sesshomaru got himself into trouble, and he asked for me to care for you until he can return and take you back."

"Really? He still wants me?" Rin asked, and her misted eyes filled with tears, one falling down her face. Jaken must have left the girl alone some time ago for her to be this lonely.

"He does. He loves you, he just doesn't know how to say it." Kagome soothed, gently wiping away the few tears that h ad fallen over plump cheeks. "So, why don't you pack up your things and we can find somewhere to camp."

Rin's little face contorted into frustration and the girl shook her head, taking a few steps back. "Rin wants to, Lady Kagome. But Lord Sesshomaru gave me a secret word. If anyone was to come to me telling me they had his orders, they would have a secret word. Do you know it?" Rin asked, as Ah-Un came to stand behind her, grazing on a fresh piece of grass.

"Not right now, but I can figure it out. How about this. I'm really tired, and I'm sure Shippo would love to have someone to play with other than Kirara. Do you mind if we stay here with you for tonight?" Kagome asked, her voice understanding and proud of the little girl. Not many would continue to listen to someone who hadn't been there in months.

"Keh. What are you going to do, dream about the bastard again." InuYasha scoffed, and Kagome wasted no time in forming his bed for the night by saying one simple word.

"I will say this one last time InuYasha." Kagome said, turning to look at the crater. No-one had heard Kagome's voice so cold before, and InuYasha's eyes widened. "You will refrain from bad mouthing Sesshomaru. Especially in front of Rin. I wont have you poisoning her against her father, when he desperately wants to get back to her. Enough is enough."

She stared down at a shocked hanyou for a few long and tense moments before turning and making her way back towards Rin. "Come on, is there a spring around here?" She asked softly, and Rin began speaking animatedly as Kagome grabbed her big yellow bag, followed by Titan. Kagome could really use some time to relax, and getting to know Rin better was the perfect option.

…CBCH…

Sesshomaru walked through the empty dream world looking for the miko. Normally she was here first, due to him not falling asleep till after she did. It was the best way to protect her. However, he understood her absence for the night. She was caring for another child.

Rin had been ecstatic to have others around, and she played with Shippo until her little legs couldn't carry her anymore. Kagome had then picked up the child, placed her in the funny bedding she carried, and began chasing down Shippo to get him ready for bed as well. It took time, but finally the kitsune crawled in with Rin and settled down.

Kagome was patient yet firm with the children, and Sesshomaru couldn't help but to admire her mothering skills. She had no help from the others, but she didn't ask for it either. She accepted responsibility without expecting anything in return, and this made his chest feel funny. It was as if it was filling with something, some type of pressure, and he hated it.

It had been a few weeks in total that they had been traveling across the country side, and finding Rin had put Sesshomaru in such a peace he curled up beside the funny looking futon and fell asleep while listening to Kagome tell the children a story.

He woke up immediately later, and realized he missed her voice, and that had him in the bad mood he was currently in. Why should he miss the voice of a human? She was beneath him, and while her voice was soft and caring it wasn't anything he should enjoy. Yet he did, and he had no idea why. In fact, the more he was around the woman, the more he began to question himself.

He was a demon lord, yet he found himself doing things he would only be doing for Rin. He thought that maybe he had a soft spot for human females, but he did not react this way towards the slayer. Only Rin and the miko had his attention, and it seemed as if he couldn't look away. He accepted it for Rin a long time ago, wrote it off as he being a child, but now he was questioning that even. Kagome was no child, and he was beginning to have instincts concerning her as well.

He wanted to protect her. Much farther than their original deal ran. He wanted to make sure no harm came to her physical, emotionally, and even mentally. He wanted to kill InuYasha every time he attacked Kagome in some way. He wanted to rip out his brothers throat for talking to her the way he did. None of this Sesshomaru understood.

Letting his anger get the best of him, Sesshomaru snarled and struck out at the nearest tree. It splintered into pieces, sending wood falling as the truck crackled and popped, snapping in half and slowly making a decent to the earth that resulted in a vibrating thump.

"Did it look at you funny?" Kagome giggled from behind him, and he tensed, not turning to look at her. Of course she would see him throw a fight at his confusion. But then his eyes narrowed, wondering why it should matter if she saw that or not. He spun to her, bending to pick up two large trunks of the tree and handing one out towards her.

"We train, miko." Sesshomaru snapped, hating, yet loving the way her eyes still laughed at him. What was happening inside him? Why was he changing? More importantly, how was the miko involved?

"Can I ask you something first?" Kagome asked, and Sesshomaru nodded, hoping she hadn't noticed the difference he was noticing as well. "You want me to take in Rin, and we found her, but she says I need a secret word."

"Good girl." Sesshomaru growled, his pride evident. It had taken everything he had not to lick the child's face when she turned down the miko. It was a test of sorts, making sure the child still obeyed him, even if he wasn't around. Everything he did was for her protection.

"Yea, she is. Not many people would think to teach her that, and I'm glad you did. It will keep her safe." Kagome agreed, and Sesshomaru eyed her for a moment. A tingling feeling running down his spine at her praise. "Can you tell me that word?"

"Little bird." Sesshomaru replied, looking up to the sky and thinking of the time he and Rin had come up with that saying. "She is my little bird." He whispered out loud and not realizing it. Kagome simply smiled and let him have his moment, knowing she was forgotten as he traveled through the past.

"Sesshomaru?" She called again after a few silent moments. He looked towards her, glad eyes blinking in expectance. And she smirked towards him. She felt so much more free here, then she did in the real world. "How did you come across Rin?"

Sesshomaru had not been expecting that question, and he paused for a moment debating on his answer. To tell her, would admit that he had a moment of softness that now followed him around. He had told no one the true story of Rin and his meeting, not even Jaken. But, looking at Kagome, he somehow knew she wouldn't think less of him.

So he told her. Admitted that InuYasha had injured him, and Rin had attempted to help him. Spoke of the beatings and rapes the child had endured, and how she was still able to smile at him. He told her of the wolves, and that Rin had been a victim of Kouga's pack, but Sesshomaru had revived her. When he was done, Kagome cried freely, her hand covering her mouth at the sad story of Rin's life.

Sesshomaru hadn't known what hit him when the miko was suddenly leaning against his chest, sobbing as loudly as she could. He knew she was finally having the release she has needed these past few days, and while he wanted to push her away because of the intense confusing feelings rolling through him at her touch, he wanted to give her what she needed. So he let her cry. He let her cry for Rin, and for herself.

He stood still, not moving an inch, his hands tightened into fist. He wanted to return her embrace, but didn't know if that was welcome or not, so he forced himself to stay still, not moving as the miko clutched to him. He never had armor in this world, and strangely, at this moment, he was glad for it.

Kagome soon calmed down and reduced her sobs to sniffles, before pulling away and wiping her face with her inner elbow. Her eyes were puffy, and swollen, but they shined with a light that had been missing for sometime.

"Thank you, Sesshomaru. For everything." She whispered, leaning towards him again. He expected her to embrace him like she did moments ago, but instead she kissed his cheek, her lips soft against his skin. His eyes widened at the burn left behind from her touch and his eyes locked with hers. For a moment he thought about tasting her lips, but he pushed that away as soon as it popped up. She was human, and beneath him. He wouldn't lower himself for a rut that would most likely leave him dissatisfied.

He picked up the stick the miko had dropped when she clung to him and handed it to her. She, nor he, said a word as they got into stance and prepared for a training session. For the life of him he couldn't keep his mind off of the miko.

Even as they woke the next morning, his eyes followed the woman, watching as she immediately went to Rin, woke the child, and whispered something in her ear. Rin squealed in happiness and wrapped her arms around Kagome's neck, and Kagome let out a laugh that for once, was real.

He had no idea what was happening to him. He know no idea how the miko was some how involved. But what scared him the most… he had no idea if he wanted to stop it.

…sSs…

I hope my writers block is gone with this one. I've gotten past it with two others, as well as two new stories I'm writing with a friend. Hopefully this means ill be able to come back to all of them eventually. If you like NCIS and Ghost adventures, I am writing those stories with a friend from high school. You can check them out of you want. And if you don't, I still hope you enjoy this chapter.