Lucifer: More Than My Own Existence
Chapter 3
A Broken Family
By the time Michael figured there was something wrong, it was too late. Liz's fear over their daughters' safety was what first let him know his family needed him, and while he was in heaven when he felt this immense fear, he immediately took flight. He was half-way there when he felt Liz's sudden fear turn to terror, felt the pain with the first gunshot, and the three that followed. The agony was enough to cause him to fall a few thousand feet before righting himself. It was through this connection that he felt Liz leave, their daughter, this world and him behind.
It shouldn't have hurt this bad, knowing Liz was dead. She would go to heaven, of that Michael was certain, where else would someone like Liz go. Hell was out of the question. It wasn't like he would never be able to go and see her. No, the hurt was in knowing that Sara, his daughter, had just lost her mother and was injured as well. This is what really helped him to keep from falling back to earth. He had to get to Sara.
Hold on Sara, he thought to himself. Sara. Such a simple beautiful name Liz had chosen. Granted it was a play on words with Liz's last name, Sara Fenn, seraphim, an angel of the highest order and one of pure light. Given that Michael, Lucifer, Amenadiel, and Gabriel were all of that order, Michael thought it would be perfect. He might not be able to be there physically to see her grow up, at least her name would inspire her to be the best human she could. He still remembered the day he realized he would not be able to keep his little piece of happiness.
Michael was managing the Coffee Hut while Liz had taken Sara to her two-week appointment. There were no customers, so he saw Raphael through the window before he actually came into the shop.
"Hello, brother" Raphael said, strolling in, looking about the place in mild contempt.
He plastered a fake smile to his face as he greeted him back, "It is good to see you Raphe. It has been too long."
"Yes, it has." Raphael was the picture of divinity. Curly blonde hair, sharp blue eyes and Michael couldn't believe it, but his brother was actually wearing his war armor and had his bloody wings out. Not that a human would see them. That was Raphael's gift, he could make humans see what he wanted them to. Think burning bush, or an angel with sixteen wings.
Michael came out from behind the counter, grateful Liz and Sara were not there. "What brings you to Earth? Has Father send you here on assignment?"
Raphael's mouth twitched a little at the corners, "In away. Your absence has been noticed in the Silver City. I was sent to check on you."
His stomach dropped a little. But only a little. If his siblings knew about Liz or Sara, Remiel would have come to fetch his daughter, not Raphael. So, it stood to reason, they knew nothing of his family.
"Well," Michael said, as he removed the apron and tossed it back behind the counter. "Consider me checked on and in good health. Feel free to return to heaven and let them all know."
Raphael walked over to a table Michael had not yet cleared, acting as if hadn't heard him and picked up the unfinished coffee. "I think you miss understand me, Brother." He sniffed the contents in disgust, "I know about your human."
The smile vanished from Michael's face and a knot formed in the pit of his stomach, "What of her brother? There is no rule that says I cannot interact with humans."
Setting the coffee down, he wiped his hands on the tablecloth. "It is the way you have interacted. You are getting too intimate with this human. I know she is aware of who and what you really are. Humans and the divine cannot mix." He walked up to Michael and placed a hand on his shoulder, "Brother, what would happen if you were to father a child with this human? You know that is forbidden."
Michael felt relief flood his body. Raphael knew of Liz and that he was with her but knew nothing of Sara. Not to mention that having a child was not forbidden, just frowned up. He knocked Michael's hand off his shoulder, "What do you want Raphael?"
Turning his back on Michael and lacing his hands behind his back he answered, almost smugly, "Your mission from Father is finished, you will return with me to the Silver City, now."
A small laugh escaped Michael's lips, "If Father truly wanted me back in the Silver City, he would have sent Amenadiel, not you." It was true. Amenadiel was the only angel Michael could not beat, but he had come pretty damn close.
Michael had to jump back when Raphael spun around, letting his brother's wings knock over the tables, "Again you misunderstand. If you do not come with me, well lets' just say humans are such fragile creatures."
Before Raphael could stop him, Michael had him by the throat and shoved up against the right-side of the wall, his black wings out, a snarl leaving his throat. "Do not piss me off brother."
Raphael was laughing now, "I sometimes forget how much you can look like him when you are mad."
Michael didn't need him to say whom he was referring to. But he would use it if it would keep his family safe, "Lucifer isn't the only one who liked to punish evil. You come near Elizabeth and I will end you." He let him go and stepped back. "Brother," came out more of an expletive.
Getting to his feet, while rubbing his throat, Raphael glared at him, "You both definitely share a temper." He took a moment than faced Michael, "You cannot protect her forever. Yes, angels can't kill humans, but you know Uriel talent. Will you really subject her to a life of constantly looking over her shoulder? That's no life. Not even for a human."
Damn it, Michael thought. He hated to admit but Raphael was right. If he stayed there with Liz, it wouldn't just put her in harm's way but their daughter as well. His heavenly family would find out about Sara, even with the Liz wearing the Huc Angelus. All it did was hide Sara's divine heritage; it did not hide her physically. There were two things Michael was not willing to gamble on, the life of the woman he loved and the life of his child.
He looked away, "Very well. I will return." He faced Raphael and his brother was wearing a smug look on his face. Another growl left his lips and Raphael found himself plastered against the wall, this time it was Michaels' forearm at his throat, pinning him in place. "But I will say goodbye to her alone," he growled at him. Michael felt his eyes flash and a brief look of panic wiped the smugness of Raphael's face, who nodded, so Michael released him. "I will return to the Silver City with the sunrise tomorrow."
Raphael started to object but again Michael glared at him. "As you wish brother," was all he said before he slunk off like a beaten dog.
After Raphael had creeped out of the Coffee Shop, Michael close up early. If this was going to be his last day with his family, he would make it memorable.
It had hurt Michael to tell Sara he would have to return home and at first, she had thought it would not be permanent.
"Well," she told him holding back tears and not really believing the words coming out of her mouth, "it's not like you won't be returning eventually."
He had shaken his head sadly, "I cannot return, it will put you and Sara in too much danger."
There had been a lot of tears on Liz's part and it had broken Michael's heart, not being able to give her what she truly wanted, which was for him to stay. Liz had hung a sign on the Coffee Shops' door that it would be closed the following day and she, Sara and Michael had driven out to the Cliffs. Liz had waited in the car while he took his daughter for a final flight, knowing that he would not be there, should she end up with wings, to teach her to fly and she let a few tears fall before wiping them away.
Michael had flown out over the sea so far that not even the shore lights were visible by the time he thought it best to turn and head back. If he'd wanted he could have flown all the way to the Atlantic and still be back long before the sun rose. But that would have taken time from Liz and now that Sara was sound asleep in his arms, he knew he didn't want to waste a moment with her.
Liz had wrapped herself up in a blanket seated on the only bench and was waiting for him to return. She didn't get up when he landed with their daughter, just motioned to the car. Michael took the hint, and ever so gently place Sara securely in the car seat. It was warmer in there and even Michael could feel that tonight would be chilled. She took a shaky breath when he returned to her.
"Michael, I can't raise her on my own," her voice shook.
He was next to her in an instant, his arms around her and pulling her tight to his chest. "If I knew of a way to keep the both of you safe, I would in a heartbeat. If they find out about Sara, they will take her from you, and I know that will destroy your heart. Better it be me than Sara."
There was nothing Liz could argue about those statements. As much as she loved Michael, losing her daughter would kill her. "I hate this!" She wrapped her arms around him, as if trying to keep him from flying off. Which, in a way, she was. "Why can't they just leave you alone."
A smile played at his lips, but he didn't dare laugh, not right now. "I don't know Liz, but I do know this, I can't let them hurt you like that. And so, I'll return." He pulled out of her embrace and cupped her delicate chin with his hand, "But if I think for a second, I can return to you and Sara, I will." He kissed her forehead. "I promise."
Elizabeth could tell he wanted to say something else, "Say it," she told him, gently caressing his cheek, while looking into his eyes. "I want to hear you say it."
Michael looked away towards the rising sun knowing that Raphael would not wait a second longer than he had to. He gazed back to her, his eyes saying what she wanted him to say. "I love you, Elizabeth Fenn. He kissed her again and she smiled sadly up at him. There was no way she could keep him here and she knew it.
Flying away from Liz and Sara had been the hardest thing Michael had ever endured in his long life. But now, flying back to his daughter was the most painful.
He tucked his wings and landed half a block away, out of sight of prying eyes, and ran the rest. Because Liz was no longer alive Michael could sense Sara as a Celestial being. He needed to get to her quickly before his family realized what it was they were sensing. It had been many millenniums since a Celestial was born and Michael was hoping they would not recognize the signs.
He arrived before there were too many there were cops, but it looked as if the paramedics had already been there and left. The officers who would most likely be working the case had not shown up yet, so the few officers who were there had blocked off the whole sidewalk in front of the store, but this didn't stop him. He pulled the tape aside and walked towards the door.
"Sir!" an angry voice shouted from behind him. "You can't go in theā¦" The officer stopped short when Michael turned to face him. "Oh! Lucifer. I'm sorry. Didn't recognize you." He glanced up and down eyeing Michael's wardrobe, "Trying a new look are ya?"
Michael was currently wearing jeans, a white t-shirt, with sneakers. He just nodded, a small knot forming in his stomach. He knew Lucifer was no longer minding hell but had no idea his twin had set up shop in L.A. If his twin was there maybe, he should reconsider just running into the shop. But the idea of Lucifer finding out about Sara was enough to keep him moving.
"Odd. You beat Detective Decker here." The officer motioned for Michael to head in. Again, Michael kept his response to a simple nod.
Michael was met with blood and carnage. There was still a body lying in the middle of the shop covered in a white sheet, the pool of blood had already soaked through. There was also, happily no sign of his brother. A woman sat alone at the table furthest from the body and look to be an employee there, she still wore Coffee Shop apron. He be-lined for her.
"I'm sorry Miss," Michael said as he took a seat across from her. Her eyes lit up for a second and then as if remember what she had just seen, they darkened. "I know you have been through a lot but I'm looking for Sara Fenn. I know she was here, and I know she was injured. Could you tell me where they took her?"
Cora couldn't take her eyes off this man. Yes, he was certainly not her normal type, very tall, dark hair, and the deepest dark brown eyes she had ever seen. His voice was deep, husky and brought all kinds of inappropriate thoughts to her. Not to mention that t-shirt did nothing but enhance the physic underneath it. Then she remembered what had happened just ten minutes ago and she lowered her eyes and shook her head. She looked up again when she felt him take her hand.
"Please." God his eyes looked so sad and so worried. "I knew Liz and I need to make sure Sara is alright."
Michael pushed a little with his mind, encouraging this woman to open up to him.
She shook her head but answered, "They took Sara to Cedar's Trauma Center in downtown LA. She didn't look good."
Another officer came up to the table and draped a blanket around her before asking her to follow him outside, he gave Michael a node, most likely mistaken him for Lucifer, as he guided the woman out of the shop. This left Michael alone in the shop. He got to his feet and cast a quick glance around the place but wished to his Father he hadn't. Liz was lying just behind the counter. Before he knew it, he found himself kneeling beside her. The cops hadn't covered her body and Michael brushed a stray strand of hair out of her face, shocked at how cold and colorless she was.
Tears stung the corner of his eyes and it still surprised him how much it hurt to know that Liz r was really gone from this world. He took a deep breath telling himself that once he checked on Sara, he would head up to heaven to check on Liz. He knew he couldn't stay too much longer, not if he wanted to avoid running into his twin. He leaned down, kissed Liz on her cold forehead, removed the Huc Angelus from her neck and took his leave out the back door.
He had just opened the back door in the office, when he heard a version of his voice with a thick British accent. "I'm telling you Detective, I just arrived. I have no idea what that officer is talking about." For just a moment Michael considered revealing himself to Lucifer but stopped, Sara needed him. "And seriously," his brother continued with such distain in his voice, Michael grinned, "do you think I would EVER wear jeans?" Once out the door he took flight. He'd lived in L.A. long enough he knew where Cedar's Trauma Center.
When Sara was five her mom gave her the nickname Hummingbird. She and her mother had gone camping on the coast. It was just the two of them and since Sara was only five, her mom tended to keep a close eye on her. This time Sara managed to give her mom the slip. She had seen a red neck hummingbird and had followed it. She remembered looking up at the hummingbird, with her little hands reached up towards it. Then she was falling. She had been so enthralled with this tiny little flying creature that she didn't see the edge of the cliff and had walked right off it.
Her stomach dropped and what air was left in her chest rushed out. Some long forgotten instinct kick in and Sara pointed her feet towards the rapidly approaching ground. She felt the muscles of her back tighten and an excruciating burning sensation erupted. Dark wings unfurled and managed to catch some air. They faltered for a moment, but Sara willed them to stay open, even though the fire shooting across her back brought tears to her eyes. Her descent slowed and a few feet from the bottom she tightened her back muscles and her wings flapped, allowing her to hover for just a moment before her feet touched the ground. She was now standing on the beach shore, the waves lapping at her feet, with a fifty-foot cliff at her back.
By the time Liz found her, unharmed, her dark wings still out, Sara had been terrified. To this day her mom believed it was the fall and the appearance of her wings that had caused her daughter to shake with fear, but it wasn't. Sara had been frightened of two things. One that she would be in trouble for wondering off, and two her mom would never let her use her wings again.
Sara never told her mom that the pain when her wings had first erupted from her back had been excruciating. Like a thousand red hot pokers being shoved out of her back. The first time waking up after being shot was probable the closes thing to that pain that she had felt in a long time.
The first time Sara finally managed to get her eyes to open, she was on a gurney in the back of an ambulance. The man had his hands on her right shoulder and was pushing hard enough to make Sara to cry out.
"I'm sorry kido, but I have to keep pressure. The bullet may have nicked an artery and I can't get your bleeding under control"
Sara didn't care about the bleeding, she cared that the burning sensation was not limited to the front of her shoulder. There was a burning pain behind her as well and she could feel a the wetness on her back. Every time he pushed on her shoulder, she felt the pain travel from front to back, and that's not even mentioning the sickening grinding noise she was hearing coming from her shoulder.
"Mike! You need to hurry. She's still bleeding, and her blood pressure is dropping."
There was a slight acceleration and Sara started to blackout.
The second time Sara managed to open her eyes, there were bright lights shining in her eyes, and voices were over lapping.
"How close was the shooter, this is a mess."
"I don't think I've seen an exit wound this large on someone so little."
"Clavicle and acromion bones are fractured."
"Careful her shoulder is dislocated."
"Tore through the scapula, nicked the axial artery, she's bleeding out."
Sara eventually tried to close her eyes, because the lights were to bright but a jolt of pain in her shoulder, followed by a very audible crack and pop, caused her eyes to fly open and a scream to come rolling out. Then happily she was out again.
This blackout was nothing like the others. There was no pain, no cold, no pressure, and no feelings in general. It was just dark. Sara didn't even feel aware of herself at all. She hated this feeling. There was no way for her to measure how much time had passed. It didn't feel like a long time, but it also felt like an eternity.
After the painful re-location of her shoulder the next thing Sara felt was, well nothing. But this was not like the black nothing. No, this was like when you go to the dentist and he shoots novacane into your mouth. Your lips feel nothing. Even when your run your fingertips over them, still nothing. That is what this new nothing felt like on the entire right side of her body.
She could hear a steady beeping off to her left, and a little bit in front of her were other voices, but they were muffled and there was no way for Sara to make-out what they were saying. However, the male voice beside her left ear was perfectly clear.
"Sara, I am so sorry. I tried to get there in time, but I was too late."
This voice brought back long forgotten memories. Sea air, cold air whipping her face, and the smell of salt-water, and strong arms wrapping her up protectively.
She felt him take her left hand and hold it tight. "I cannot stay and protect you, but I will be keeping a closer eye on you." She felt him press her hand to his lips. "This," he was saying, "will keep you hidden from my family." She felt him slip something over her head, it landed to rest just below her throat. "It was your mothers. Remember to never take it off Sara." He knew she could hear him, or he wouldn't be telling her this.
Sara tried as hard as she could to will her eyes open, they fluttered a little but wouldn't stay open.
"I love you Sara," he kissed her forehead, "I will always love you."
She could feel him start to let go of her hand and not knowing why she tightened her grip on him, at least she tried. He must have felt her try and squeeze his hand because she felt him hesitate.
She took that opportunity to force her eyes to open. She was in a hospital room, that much was obvious. The lighting was wrong though, it all looked a soft pink. She blinked a couple times to try and make sense of it. Sara turned her head to the side and was meet with the darkest chocolate brown eyes. I know those eyes, she thought.
"Please," she whispered. Even though she was the one saying it, even she could barely make out what she said. The man beside her seemed to have no problem hearing her. "Don't go."
He gave her hand a gentle squeeze back, "I have to honey. You are not safe if I stay."
I wasn't safe with you gone, she wanted to say back, because she finally realized who she was looking at. Her father.
Since she couldn't voice what she wanted she shook her head and held his hand tighter, or at least she thought she did. But whatever energy she had left her and she could feel herself sinking back into the nothingness. "Dad, please."
But he was already gone.
